Questions Only

[Heathcliff]

Didn't I get it from you?

[Indyben]

Didn't I get it from my sister?

[Heathcliff]

Where did she get it from?

[Indyben]

Wasn't she insane?

[Heathcliff]

Did I miss something?

[Pendragon]

Didn't you get the memo?

[Jazz_]

Did anyone get the memo?

[hack]

Is 'memo' short for something taller?

[dafydd manton]

Is abbreviating words sizeist?

[Genocide]

Wouldn't it just be lazy?

[MarkBastable]

Sa whu?

[Genocide]

I c wha u did thar...

What were we talking about?

[dafydd manton]

Hw th hll shld I knw?

[mrv]

Weren't you the psychic one?

[Genocide]

Are you questioning his powers?

[mrv]

Don't you see him questioning them himself?

[dafydd manton]

Are you suggesting that I talk to myself?

[Genocide]

Don't all psychics?

[dafydd manton]

Why should we....er.....they?

[Genocide]

What am I thinking right now?

[dafydd manton]

You're not trying to tell me you were thinking, are you?

[Darcy101]

would i lie to you?

[Genocide]

Was that an insult, sir?

[Indyben]

Whose thinking?

[hack]

Is there an answer key?

[Maryd.]

Does anyone here, really think?

[hack]

Think about what?

[Maryd.]

How am I supposed to know?

[Jazz_]

Didn't you ask the original question?

[Genocide]

Doesn't everyone think?

[MarkBastable]

You've never been to Burnley, have you?

[tailor STATELY]

Would that be the Burnley Vineyards and Winery located in Barboursville, VA ?

[Genocide]

Doesn't he mean Burnley, UK?

[dafydd manton]

Why would anyone in their right mind voluntarily go to Burnley, Lancs?

[Maryd.]

Are you saying I don't have a right mind?

[dafydd manton]

Wouldn't that depend on whether you would like to go to Burnley?

[Maryd.]

What's in Burnley?

[dafydd manton]

Can you imagine nothing, going rusty?

[Maryd.]

What's rusty?

[dafydd manton]

Would you believe me if I said "Burnley"?

[Maryd.]

Is Burnley really rusty?

[dafydd manton]

If you go there and see something that isn't either rusty, shabby or dirty, would you let me know?

[Maryd.]

Will you pay my fair to England?

[Indyben]

Is England nice this time of year?

[dafydd manton]

Which part? Burnley?

[Heathcliff]

Is it significantly different to other places in England?

[dafydd manton]

Do you know how many times we've tried to cut it off, float it out into the North Sea and sink it?

[Maryd.]

Why would you do that?

[dafydd manton]

Would I get in to terrible trouble if I spoke the truth?

[hack]

Isn't truth beauty, and beauty truth?

[aliengirl]

Does it mean that ugliness is false?

[dafydd manton]

Would that then mean that Burnley is false, thus doesn't exist, making the last dozen or so posts a waste of time?

[Madhuri]

Is playing in this thread a waste of time? :eek:

[dafydd manton]

Wouldn't that depend on how seriously one took oneself?

[hack]

If beauty is only skin deep, then is ugly to the bone?

[dafydd manton]

What's that got to do with Burnley?

[tailor STATELY]

Is there a there there ?

[dafydd manton]

Since there is a their, why not a there, there?

[tailor STATELY]

They're there ?

[dafydd manton]

Surely, they're their, there?

[hack]

Is the weir there fashioned from their hair or
of some other ware, of which I am unaware?

[dafydd manton]

Were you aware that there were weird, way-out wares to be wary of that were what we're worrying about, like Wade?

[tailor STATELY]

Who's Wade ?

[Genocide]

What's he done?

[tailor STATELY]

How can we find out ?

[Genocide]

Should we keep asking?

[mrv]

What else can we do now, when we've been made aware that there were weird, way-out wares to be wary of that were what we're worrying about, like Wade?

[Genocide]

Well aren't we smart?

[Indyben]

Can we be classed as intelligent?

[dafydd manton]

Would Wade think we were, given that he was a potter?

[Indyben]

Did you know my parents collect Wade pottery?

[Heathcliff]

Should I nod my head and pretend I know what that is?

[hack]

Did you know that when a potter throws a pot at a wheel,
if the clay is just right, the pot can capture the ambient
sounds, and hold them, like a phonograph recording, and
that if we could make the proper device for retrieving them,
we should be able to hear dogs barking, children playing,
and psalms sung to long forgotten gods, all in ancient
wares that are most admired for all the wrong reasons?

[MarkBastable]

I've thought about this before, in terms of rendered walls, and I reckon that we should be able to recover the conversations that were taking place between the plasterers who were slapping render on the walls of Tutankhamun's tomb. Er. Don't you?

[dafydd manton]

Wouldn't the noise of the bricklayers drown them out?

[Genocide]

Haven't they tried that in some kind of murder trial?

[dafydd manton]

Surely, that was the Tower of Babel, wasn't it?

[Indyben]

Is that Babel as in Babelfish?

[Heathcliff]

Isn't that the online translator I've just been using?

[MarkBastable]

isn' t dat de online vertaler ik heb just gebruikt?

[Heathcliff]

Do you think it is useful?

[Maryd.]

Do you understand it?

[Heathcliff]

Why would I use a translator if I already understood it?

[Indyben]

Why not?

[Heathcliff]

What is the Italian word for pizza?

[Indyben]

Isn't it pizza?

[MarkBastable]

Yeah - why would the Italians make up their own word for it, when we've given them a perfectly serviceable one already?

[dafydd manton]

How do we know if they already have a translator?

[Indyben]

Because the derpy?

[aliengirl]

What is derpy?

[mrv]

Derpy?

[dafydd manton]

Are we still doing this in English?

[mrv]

I guess we are, no?

[Genocide]

Porque no lo hacemos en espanol?

[dafydd manton]

Kennst du dass wir solche Dinge nicht verstehen?

[Maryd.]

My gosh, what thread am I on?

[Genocide]

No sabes?

You don't know?

[dafydd manton]

You're not asking me to help, are you?

[Genocide]

Why would you think that?

[Indyben]

Wouldn't it be nice to offer someone help?

[dafydd manton]

Who were you thinking of?

[MarkBastable]

Is it just me, or is this game kinda running out of steam?

[Genocide]

Are you bored of it?

[Indyben]

Why am I awake at 10:34 in the morning on a sunday?

[Heathcliff]

Am I awake at 10.43?

[Indyben]

is that what your clock says?

[Heathcliff]

Do you think my clock is wrong?

[Indyben]

Does it matter what I think about your clock's time?

[Heathcliff]

Could you let me know so I could change it?

[Indyben]

What do you think my clock says?

[Heathcliff]

Is it a few minutes after mine?

[Indyben]

How do I answer that with a question?

[Heathcliff]

Could you ask me to change the time on my clock?

[tailor STATELY]

Am I too slow ?

[Indyben]

Can I?

[tailor STATELY]

May I ?

[Indyben]

How should I know?

[hack]

How could you not, no?

[Indyben]

does the fact I'm an idiot account for anything?

[Maryd.]

Who called you an idiot?

[tailor STATELY]

Isn't Who on first ?

[Maryd.]

What?

[tailor STATELY]

Isn't What on second ?

[Maryd.]

Should I ask who's on third?

[tailor STATELY]

Isn't Who still on first ? (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Who's_on_First%3F)

[neilgee]

Isn't that Who sneaking out of the back door?

[dafydd manton]

Didn't they disband for a while after Keith Moon died?

[Maryd.]

Who's Keith Moon?

[dafydd manton]

Wasn't he the drummer with The Who?

[Maryd.]

How did we get onto the subject of drummers?

[Genocide]

Would you prefer guitarists?

[Indyben]

Aren't we just awesome?

[dafydd manton]

Yes, but are we as awesome as Keith Moon?

[Jazz_]

Who likes The Who?

[dafydd manton]

The Human League?

[Genocide]

Don't you want me, baby?

[dafydd manton]

Haven't we only just been introduced?

[Genocide]

Don't you know I was asking if you liked the song?

[tailor STATELY]

Who's song was that ?

[hack]

Are you as tired as you think I am?

[tailor STATELY]

Would you bring me a glass of water if I was ?

[Indyben]

Wouldn't coffee be better if you were tired?

[Genocide]

But isn't water healthier?

[tailor STATELY]

May I please have a glass of water ?

[Genocide]

Do you like iced water?

[tailor STATELY]

May I have ice cubes ?

[Genocide]

Do I look like an ice dispenser?

[dafydd manton]

Did nobody tell you about the restorative properties of a Nice Cup o' Tea?

[tailor STATELY]

Mind if I have a bit of mint tea ?

[dafydd manton]

Mint? Mint?? What d'you think this is? A Restaurant??

[tailor STATELY]

"To bed, to bed, perchance to dream" ?

[dafydd manton]

What time do you want the alarm setting for?

[Heathcliff]

Who wants to wake up early anyway?

[dafydd manton]

Who said anything about early?

[Indyben]

What time is it in Wales?

[Heathcliff]

What time would be considering it is 1pm here?

[Indyben]

Could it be derpy 'Oclock

[Heathcliff]

Wouldn't the King of Derpysville know the time in Derpy?

[Genocide]

What's with all the "derpy"?

[dafydd manton]

Is it foreign?

[Madhuri]

Foreign...with respect to which place?

[dafydd manton]

Where whould you like it to be foreign to?

[Maryd.]

Do I have to say?

[Pensive]

Why would you rather not say?

[Maryd.]

Why do you need to know?

[Pensive]

Why are we blessed (or cursed :p) with curiosity in our nature?

[Maryd.]

Are you cursed or blessed?

[dafydd manton]

Is it us that are cursed, or them?

[Indyben]

Why would we be cursed when we have an entire life that is ours to control?

[dafydd manton]

Now, who told you that you control your own life?

[Indyben]

Who else can control it?

[Heathcliff]

Is there a remote controller?

[Indyben]

Do you have the ability to make a metaphorical remote control?

[MarkBastable]

Shouldn't that question be in the 'Why I believe in God' thread?

[Indyben]

Aren't we talking about taking control of one's own life, not relying on God to do it for us?

[Heathcliff]

Would God need a remote control?

[Indyben]

Have you considered maybe God is a remote control?

[Heathcliff]

Who controls God?

[Jazz_]

Does that mean people press God's buttons every time they change the channel?

[Indyben]

Wouldn't God do more than change TV channels?

[Heathcliff]

Can God also fast-foward and re-wind TV?

[Indyben]

Can't God do everything?

[Heathcliff]

How do you know?

[dafydd manton]

Since He is omnipotent, and will already have seen every programme there ever was, why would He need a remote control?

[mrv]

What has omnipotence got to do with a remote control?:out:

[dafydd manton]

Why would omnipotence preclude changing channels without getting out of the throne?

[Genocide]

If God can do anything can he make a burrito so hot he can't eat it?

[mrv]

But what has omnipotence got to do with a remote control?:out:

[dafydd manton]

Are you taking this rubbish seriously?

[mrv]

Man! Will someone tell me what has omnipotence got to do with a remote control?:banghead:

[dafydd manton]

Isn't it painfully obvious?

[mrv]

Won't it be painful for you if you banged your head against a wall because no one will tell you what has omnipotence got to do with a remote control?

[dafydd manton]

Why would it hurt?

[mrv]

Do you know nothing? Nothing at all?

[Maryd.]

What makes you think I know nothing?

[mrv]

What makes you think I think you know nothing?

[Jazz_]

Did you imply that in your earlier posts?

[tailor STATELY]

Is this, like, déjà vu ?

[dafydd manton]

What exactly IS like deja vu?

[Maryd.]

Don't you know?

[dafydd manton]

Haven't we been there before?

[Maryd.]

Now, where are we going?

[dafydd manton]

Weren't you supposed to be telling me?

[Maryd.]

Why do I have to do the talking?

[dafydd manton]

Isn't that what women do best? *Ducks*

[Maryd.]

(Slaps! - You didn't duck low enough!!!)

Do you think you could out-talk us?

[dafydd manton]

D'you really think I'd be daft enough to try?

[Maryd.]

Do you think it would make a difference if you tried?

[dafydd manton]

Would I want to live that dangerously?

[Maryd.]

Why would you not want to live dangerously?

[Jazz_]

Is anyone else living dangerously?

[Maryd.]

Should I live dangerously, because you do?

[dafydd manton]

Is Jazz your role-model?

[Maryd.]

Why, are you jealous?

[dafydd manton]

With my good looks, money, career, intelligence, fashion sense, youth, popularity and unbelievably fantastic modesty?

[Maryd.]

Would also say that you were witty as well?

[dafydd manton]

Do you think I might not have mentioned that because of my unbelievable modesty?

[Maryd.]

Is there a reason you need to brag?

[dafydd manton]

Didn't I tell you about the Inferiority Complex?

[Maryd.]

Why do you feel this way?

[dafydd manton]

Sorry, are you talking to little insignificant me?

[Maryd.]

Um, er, you are the only one here?

[dafydd manton]

Hadn't you seen that leprachaun over there, behind the tree?

[Genocide]

Does he have a pot of gold?

[dafydd manton]

Bit avaricious, ain't it?

[Heathcliff]

Do you know which way to hold the remote control to get it to work?

[Genocide]

Towards the television, no?

[Jazz_]

Did that work?

[dafydd manton]

Are these remote controls for televisions, then?

[MarkBastable]

Taking it for granted that, if you're anything like me, you'll have a remote for the TV, a remote for the cable box, a remote for the DVD player, a remote for the iPod dock and a remote for the retracting cover over the pool full of maneating sharks, what's the greatest number of remotes any of us have in one room of the house?

[dafydd manton]

You are cool enough to have a remote for the man-eating shark Pool?

[MarkBastable]

Well, one has to these days - one just can't retain the henchstaff, can one?

[Genocide]

Why can't one? (doesn't that sound silly?)

[dafydd manton]

If one hasn't got henchstaff, should one be enquiring about one's ability?

[MarkBastable]

Honestly - you people have no idea of the expense, the administration, the sheer bureaucratic slog involved in running a secret organisation hellbent on global domination, do you?

[Genocide]

Why wouldn't we?

[dafydd manton]

Do you realise the expense, administration and sheer bureacratic slog I'm having trying to run No 13A Abattoir View Villas?

[MarkBastable]

Okay - you - Genocide - the insolent one - just for future reference, what's your full name and address?

[Genocide]

Would you like my SS (or NI) number as well?

[dafydd manton]

Flat 64
13A Abattoir View Villas
Gasworks Lane
Grotsville
W1A 4WW

OK?

[MarkBastable]

Not you, manton - would it surprise you to discover that, in terms of my intention to achieve total control over the minds and bodies of the population of Sheffield, I don't really consider you an obstacle?

[Genocide]

Does that make me a threat?

[MarkBastable]

If I were to tell you that I plan to eliminate threats, irritations, cellphone salespersons, a really rude bloke on London Bridge station and anyone who likes Abba, into which category do you think I'd feel you fell?

[Genocide]

Is it suicide to say the first?

[MarkBastable]

Let's just say that it's probably not a good idea to start reading any long books, shall we?

[Genocide]

Was that a threat, sir?

[dafydd manton]

Please can I be one of your henchpersons?

[MarkBastable]

How are you at laughing gruffly and saying 'Yes, boss' before going on to bugger up the simplest knot-tying task in my absence?

[dafydd manton]

Yeah Boss, OK Boss, We get dis bum good Boss, What did you say, again? *chews gum inexpertly, dribbles*

[Genocide]

Wow, that's what your henchmen are like?