Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

[prendrelemick]

Farmer? Honesty?

Alert the mod team, someone's hacked Mick's account!


Relax, I'm just not myself - sleep deprivation.

[soundofmusic]

its very late and I can't go to bed until this bloody sheep has lambed. Then I have a dawn patrol, at dawn, to do - a typical lambing day so far. I've passed the tired and the short tempered stages, and have entered the zombification phase.

Can anyone explain to me why blokes stay up when their livestock deliver and go out with their mates when their wives do?:cool:


We don't get any spare, and we'd share with the Mother-in-law if we did. I'm not that accomplished yet. I'm hoping to do better this year.

I think when you start, it makes the vegetables expensive, but as you improve and don't have to buy more tools etc, it becomes more economical. I got about 3 months worth of potatoes last year from 6 bags of compost and a 3x2 metre bed. That was worth it. I'm now harvesting my purple sprounting broccolli and I think this is worth growing, as the broccolli we buy here is quite expensive. It grew over winter, and hasn't needed much input.

I didn't get to the alotment. Mrs Paulclem wanted to go shopping - which is fine as she hasn't been out much recently. Perhaps tonight, or tomorrow.

3 months of potatos sounds good; where do you keep them? When I buy large quantities of potatos and onions I'm always stuck as to where to put them; nothing worse than the smell of rotting potatos and onions...of course, it's hot down here.


Humiliated again!

I don't know if you chaps, and Sounds, remember my last escapade with the cistern - which by the way has been working perfectly with the new fittings that I now cannot fix myself should the need arise?

Well last Friday, Mrs Paulclem put her foot down and insisted that I change the filter on the "Big Fridge" we have had for a few years now. The cold water feature now doesn't work, and we though it likely that the filter - which hadn't been changed in 2 years - was probably blocked. So I dutifully - yet a little stressfully - found the few tools I needed for this job, and eased the "Big Fridge" out. I turned off the stopcock for the mains, which is situated helpfully next to the said "Big Fridge", and proceeded to change the filter.

Having done this, I tested the water - which still didn't work, sighed and turned to pick up my tools. It was then I noticed a stain in the wall where the stopcock was. Yes, it had begun leaking. So in failing to fix the "Big Fridge" water, I had discovered the mains stop **** had gone a rusting too far.

So - and it was 5.30 on Friday - about the same as last time - I called the plumber. He was very helpful abnd called after he had done his other jobs at 9.30pm! He was even uncomplaining, and fixed the stopcock in about 3 minutes. I gave him a cup of tea, he charged me £40 quid, and everyone was happy - (it could have been £70!).

But as a parting shot I promised not to do any plumbing jobs at 5 o'clock in the evening again, and he said - "Yes, better leave it to the wife".

Humiliated again!

I think I'd pour your tea all over that plumbers head for that wisecrack...


http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/funny.gif

God, you'd have been debagged for that only a couple of decades ago.

Nailed!

Do you have the laughing Elmo Atheist...I love that guy!

[The Atheist]

Can anyone explain to me why blokes stay up when their livestock deliver and go out with their mates when their wives do?:cool:

Animals can't talk.

;)



Do you have the laughing Elmo Atheist...I love that guy!

No, only the .gif. Sesame Street rocks!

[soundofmusic]

Animals can't talk.

;)

No, only the .gif. Sesame Street rocks!

I must admit, the few times I had to do nursing in a maternity ward; I couldn't wait to get out. NOthing like impending delivery to turn a woman into some horrible creature from the depths of hell...I seem to remember I was quite pleasant and chatty; they tell me it was a bit different after they "put me under"...I apparently cursed like a sailor....

It takes a real man to admit he likes Sesame Street; my hat is off to you...I love Sesame Street...I never quite got Barney and Pee Wee Herman.

[Paulclem]

I must admit, the few times I had to do nursing in a maternity ward; I couldn't wait to get out. NOthing like impending delivery to turn a woman into some horrible creature from the depths of hell...I seem to remember I was quite pleasant and chatty; they tell me it was a bit different after they "put me under"...I apparently cursed like a sailor....

It takes a real man to admit he likes Sesame Street; my hat is off to you...I love Sesame Street...I never quite got Barney and Pee Wee Herman.

It's because of Barney that I had to wipe over the TV a few times in the 90's when the kids were young. It used to get attacks of spontaneous vomiting when it came on with that awful song.:puke:

Anyway I'm behind with the new half of the allotment. I've dug a 12 x 3 foot bed for the Kale, but it took me an hour to dig and double rake it to get most of the grass and stuff out of it. Still it was pleasant work.

Fred, the old guy next to me was there, and he gave me a few leeks which was good of him. He still wants to use "Ivy cottage" to store his tools, which is fine.

"Red-Neck Graeme", who has an allotment nearby, but fortunately seperated by a couple of hedges, was talking to me at the weekend. He goes down every day and tipples in his shed. By the end of the morning you can tell he's been supping because every other word is an eff. He couldn't get his effing rotivator going apparently.

We call him "Red Neck Graeme" because of cetain vague racist comments he made to my wife and I in general conversation. He's one of those people who assumes that you think as they do about race, which is annoying, but pointless to follow up because he's been tippling. Having said that, he lends Fred - my allotment neighbour who is an old Afro-Carribean Guy- his hedge trimmer.

I had to laugh a couple of years ago at him. Our neighbours on the old allotment are churchy people - nice but a bit fussy. "Red Neck Graeme" had befriended them, and they though he was wonderful. He is generous, and he had given them some seedlings. He then came onto their allotment later in the morning fairly well tanked up - shouting in a good humured but embarrasing way with all the effing and blinding that goes with it. My wife and I kept our heads down as we sniggered through the scene. :lol:

[The Atheist]

I must admit, the few times I had to do nursing in a maternity ward; I couldn't wait to get out. NOthing like impending delivery to turn a woman into some horrible creature from the depths of hell...I seem to remember I was quite pleasant and chatty; they tell me it was a bit different after they "put me under"...I apparently cursed like a sailor....

I'd love to see a study done of women during childbirth - they all seem to go through identical patterns of lucidity, abuse and crying. There must be some evolutionary reason for it, but I'm damned if I can figure it. No wonder blokes used to stay out of the way!


It takes a real man to admit he likes Sesame Street; my hat is off to you...I love Sesame Street...I never quite got Barney and Pee Wee Herman.

Yeah, that Barney is disturbing. Peewee never really made it to screen much here.

[prendrelemick]

^I was never quite sure what kind of relationship there was between Ernie and Bert.

[The Atheist]

^I was never quite sure what kind of relationship there was between Ernie and Bert.

Compared to Noddy & Big Ears, nothing to worry about.

[Calidore]

I disagree that one must be a "real man" to admit liking Sesame Street. Quality is quality. Sesame Street had (has) creativity, humor, and Muppets. It teaches without teaching, to paraphrase Bruce Lee.

[prendrelemick]

I disagree that one must be a "real man" to admit liking Sesame Street.


Quite right. The lovely Maria was reason enough to tune in.


yet another fantasy figure to ease me through those teenage years, together with Daisy Duke , Emma Peel, the Dr Who assistants, Pans People, Suzi Quattro, Jaqueline Bisset, Jenny Agutter, Paa-ym off Dallas... I,ll stop now.

[The Atheist]

...Jenny Agutter...

I see you and I went to the same school of rating women.

If you haven't seen [all of] her in Walkabout, get a copy.

[prendrelemick]

Oh I've seen it/her/them.

[soundofmusic]

It's because of Barney that I had to wipe over the TV a few times in the 90's when the kids were young. It used to get attacks of spontaneous vomiting when it came on with that awful song.:puke:

Anyway I'm behind with the new half of the allotment. I've dug a 12 x 3 foot bed for the Kale, but it took me an hour to dig and double rake it to get most of the grass and stuff out of it. Still it was pleasant work.

Fred, the old guy next to me was there, and he gave me a few leeks which was good of him. He still wants to use "Ivy cottage" to store his tools, which is fine.

"Red-Neck Graeme", who has an allotment nearby, but fortunately seperated by a couple of hedges, was talking to me at the weekend. He goes down every day and tipples in his shed. By the end of the morning you can tell he's been supping because every other word is an eff. He couldn't get his effing rotivator going apparently.

We call him "Red Neck Graeme" because of cetain vague racist comments he made to my wife and I in general conversation. He's one of those people who assumes that you think as they do about race, which is annoying, but pointless to follow up because he's been tippling. Having said that, he lends Fred - my allotment neighbour who is an old Afro-Carribean Guy- his hedge trimmer.

I had to laugh a couple of years ago at him. Our neighbours on the old allotment are churchy people - nice but a bit fussy. "Red Neck Graeme" had befriended them, and they though he was wonderful. He is generous, and he had given them some seedlings. He then came onto their allotment later in the morning fairly well tanked up - shouting in a good humured but embarrasing way with all the effing and blinding that goes with it. My wife and I kept our heads down as we sniggered through the scene. :lol:

Red neck sounds like my kind of neighbor haha; exactly what is he prejudiced against? We don't really have finer prejudices over here; It's a thing between different groups of spanish and different groups of blacks and everyone else is considered white...we think we have differences; but the blacks and spanish claim that the difference between irish white and jewish white is not enough to make the curve:grouphug:


I'd love to see a study done of women during childbirth - they all seem to go through identical patterns of lucidity, abuse and crying. There must be some evolutionary reason for it, but I'm damned if I can figure it. No wonder blokes used to stay out of the way!


Yeah, that Barney is disturbing. Peewee never really made it to screen much here.

Okay, another thing...how about women biting dentists. Yeah, I was under during mouth surgery and my dentist claimed there was something about oversexed women biting dentists...did he make that up...Oh, by the way, he still has teeth marks:rolleyes:
Yeah, I don't think Peewee would travel well:smile5:


^I was never quite sure what kind of relationship there was between Ernie and Bert.

They started out as just friends who shared the same bed; later, they had twin beds and fought alot more.


I disagree that one must be a "real man" to admit liking Sesame Street. Quality is quality. Sesame Street had (has) creativity, humor, and Muppets. It teaches without teaching, to paraphrase Bruce Lee.

Bruce liked Sesame Street; god, I would have loved to see him teaching big bird some moves...and that bird sound.


Quite right. The lovely Maria was reason enough to tune in.


yet another fantasy figure to ease me through those teenage years, together with Daisy Duke , Emma Peel, the Dr Who assistants, Pans People, Suzi Quattro, Jaqueline Bisset, Jenny Agutter, Paa-ym off Dallas... I,ll stop now.

What is it with Maria; all of my men and lesbian friends have the hots for her...:confused:


I see you and I went to the same school of rating women.

If you haven't seen [all of] her in Walkabout, get a copy.

Still confused, I understand the big boobed blond tennis players; but Maria...got to see this movie. :gnorsi:

[Paulclem]

Red neck sounds like my kind of neighbor haha; exactly what is he prejudiced against? We don't really have finer prejudices over here; It's a thing between different groups of spanish and different groups of blacks and everyone else is considered white...we think we have differences; but the blacks and spanish claim that the difference between irish white and jewish white is not enough to make the curve:grouphug:



I don't know what he's prejudiced against. He's one of the "them coming over here and taking our jobs" types who don't really say anything intelligent or specific, but have a general feeling for racism. My parents were the same. I think they get these kinds of thoughts from certain newspapers and perhaps their peers hearking back to some perceived pre-immigration heaven, (which never existed of course).

[The Atheist]

I think they get these kinds of thoughts from certain newspapers and perhaps their peers hearking back to some perceived pre-immigration heaven, (which never existed of course).

Oh indeed.

If only the great British rose-tinted memories existed.

This has to be an argument in favour of time travel - let the whingers travel back to London, Liverpool and Newcastle in the 1920s and see what paradise was left behind.

[Paulclem]

Oh indeed.

If only the great British rose-tinted memories existed.

This has to be an argument in favour of time travel - let the whingers travel back to London, Liverpool and Newcastle in the 1920s and see what paradise was left behind.

Too right. It's forgotten that the post war years were full of rationing and austerity, and we didn't really begin to prosper until the 70s. Pre-war years were full of hardship for working folk. Those early fights for better pay and conditions really set us up for lter on - and contributed to the economic booms due to the redistribution of wealth.

[L€lä RËmØ MÅðçÂ]

:angelsad2:EHHH

[soundofmusic]

I don't know what he's prejudiced against. He's one of the "them coming over here and taking our jobs" types who don't really say anything intelligent or specific, but have a general feeling for racism. My parents were the same. I think they get these kinds of thoughts from certain newspapers and perhaps their peers hearking back to some perceived pre-immigration heaven, (which never existed of course).

"They took our jobs; let's go to the county square and go make love...love that South Park. Really, though, here in South Florida, people are starting to all be a sort of yellowish color and speak a sort of mixed language and I'm not sure, they might be taking our jobs...:lol:


Oh indeed.

If only the great British rose-tinted memories existed.

This has to be an argument in favour of time travel - let the whingers travel back to London, Liverpool and Newcastle in the 1920s and see what paradise was left behind.

I thought things were pretty good in Europe in the late 20s; before WW2...wasn't that the jazz age, money, money everywhere? I seem to recall we lived pretty good in the 50s and 60s, the 70s got alittle lean; but this is the leanest time I've ever seen.


:angelsad2:EHHH
Hi, is that your name...it must have been tough in first grade spelling that one:confused:

[The Atheist]

Too right. It's forgotten that the post war years were full of rationing and austerity, and we didn't really begin to prosper until the 70s. Pre-war years were full of hardship for working folk. Those early fights for better pay and conditions really set us up for lter on - and contributed to the economic booms due to the redistribution of wealth.

I think the yearning for an unreal past happens to us all at some stage. It's why humans don't remember pain very well - we've evolved to block the bad bits out to some degree and people will remember the war spirit but not the rotting corpses.


I thought things were pretty good in Europe in the late 20s; before WW2...wasn't that the jazz age, money, money everywhere?

The Great Depression not ringing any bells? Mile-long queues at soup kitchens?

It didn't seem as bad in UK & Europe because they hadn't had the boom USA had, but conditions were pretty inferior across most of the continent and UK.


I seem to recall we lived pretty good in the 50s and 60s, the 70s got alittle lean; but this is the leanest time I've ever seen.

In UK, the 1950s were still quite deprived, with rationing only being phased out, but replaced with super taxes which meant that 90% of every pound earned over an arbitrary figure was taken in tax. That's why most British rock and movie stars moved to USA at that stage - it wasn't worth earning it in Sterling because you'd give it all to the government.

I think the 1980s through to 2000 was reasonably prosperous all round, but we're seeing the fruits of that false economy now.

[soundofmusic]

I think the yearning for an unreal past happens to us all at some stage. It's why humans don't remember pain very well - we've evolved to block the bad bits out to some degree and people will remember the war spirit but not the rotting corpses.



The Great Depression not ringing any bells? Mile-long queues at soup kitchens?

It didn't seem as bad in UK & Europe because they hadn't had the boom USA had, but conditions were pretty inferior across most of the continent and UK.



In UK, the 1950s were still quite deprived, with rationing only being phased out, but replaced with super taxes which meant that 90% of every pound earned over an arbitrary figure was taken in tax. That's why most British rock and movie stars moved to USA at that stage - it wasn't worth earning it in Sterling because you'd give it all to the government.

I think the 1980s through to 2000 was reasonably prosperous all round, but we're seeing the fruits of that false economy now.

Wasn't the time after WW1 and before the stock market crash in '29...it least, it seemed that way when I'm reading my little books of Hemingway, Fitzgerald and stories of the ballet troupes...

What I remember of the 50's was that my parents lived on 1 salary, that of a welder, with 4 children, bought a new home and fairly new car, ate really well and had decent clothing on 75 dollars a week...The '80s to about '99 were also pretty good in the US; it's been all downhill since then economically

[The Atheist]

Wasn't the time after WW1 and before the stock market crash in '29...it least, it seemed that way when I'm reading my little books of Hemingway, Fitzgerald and stories of the ballet troupes...

That's true, and even in Europe the upper-class found plenty of money, but for the majority, the deprivations of war - which largely left USA intouched - were still apparent in the 1920s.


What I remember of the 50's was that my parents lived on 1 salary, that of a welder, with 4 children, bought a new home and fairly new car, ate really well and had decent clothing on 75 dollars a week...The '80s to about '99 were also pretty good in the US; it's been all downhill since then economically

Give it another six months and house prices will be back where they were in 1950s!

[soundofmusic]

That's true, and even in Europe the upper-class found plenty of money, but for the majority, the deprivations of war - which largely left USA intouched - were still apparent in the 1920s.


Give it another six months and house prices will be back where they were in 1950s!

Alot of times, I seem to notice what is going on in the literary world and forget the life at home...I seem to recall that my father, who was born in 1923, complained of wearing flour sack pants to school and eating beans 3 times a day at home.

My house, which I bought 32 years ago, is only going for about 15,000 more than I paid for it then at the moment. I'm okay because I never borrowed against it; but my friends all borrowed against there homes after the 2005 hurricane when the houses went to 5 times there value; now they owe all that and are stuck, they can't sell, they can't rent and get enough to pay the mortgage.

[The Atheist]

Alot of times, I seem to notice what is going on in the literary world and forget the life at home...I seem to recall that my father, who was born in 1923, complained of wearing flour sack pants to school and eating beans 3 times a day at home.

My house, which I bought 32 years ago, is only going for about 15,000 more than I paid for it then at the moment. I'm okay because I never borrowed against it; but my friends all borrowed against there homes after the 2005 hurricane when the houses went to 5 times there value; now they owe all that and are stuck, they can't sell, they can't rent and get enough to pay the mortgage.

A lot of people just walking away from their properties.

I scan the for sale columns for Detroit & places and look at a whole house and section being sold for $1000. Ok, these are not nice places, but they're probably still a lot nicer than a shed in Bangalore.

The world's a strange place.

[SilentMute]

A lot of people just walking away from their properties.

I scan the for sale columns for Detroit & places and look at a whole house and section being sold for $1000. Ok, these are not nice places, but they're probably still a lot nicer than a shed in Bangalore.

The world's a strange place.

You could live cheap now, are you practicing your American accent haha

[soundofmusic]

A lot of people just walking away from their properties.

I scan the for sale columns for Detroit & places and look at a whole house and section being sold for $1000. Ok, these are not nice places, but they're probably still a lot nicer than a shed in Bangalore.

The world's a strange place.


You could live cheap now, are you practicing your American accent haha

Sorry guys, I accidently jumped in while Jessica was still on the computer; that's my post...So Atheist, are you planning to move from sunny NZ anytime soon?

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...I seem to recall that my father, who was born in 1923, complained of wearing flour sack pants to school and eating beans 3 times a day at home.


Interesting conversation you have going. Both of my parents were born in 1924, God rest their souls. I remember similar "burlap" stories, such as my mother claiming to chew balls of pine pitch because they couldn't afford chewing gum. My father was born on an oil town in northern Oklahoma.


A lot of people just walking away from their properties...
...The world's a strange place.

It is crazy. the interest rate on mortgage are at all time lows. I could swear I heard 3 to 4% recently on the news. We had re financed our home a few years ago when the rates were at 5.25% thinking that it would certainly not go lower than that.


You could live cheap now, are you practicing your American accent haha

Atheist, you should consider settling in the Bible Belt. It might do you some good! ha

.

[soundofmusic]

Interesting conversation you have going. Both of my parents were born in 1924, God rest their souls. I remember similar "burlap" stories, such as my mother claiming to chew balls of pine pitch because they couldn't afford chewing gum. My father was born on an oil town in northern Oklahoma.

It is crazy. the interest rate on mortgage are at all time lows. I could swear I heard 3 to 4% recently on the news. We had re financed our home a few years ago when the rates were at 5.25% thinking that it would certainly not go lower than that.


Atheist, you should consider settling in the Bible Belt. It might do you some good! ha

.

I loved those stories! Dad said he didn't mind as long as his mom had enough fabric that he didn't get the writing on his bottom; but as his bottom widened, the words were always across his seat.
EVeryone was telling me to refinance, do you believe I just paid the house off last year; I thought I was paying 11.5; I was actually paying 12.75%:ack2:
I don't know about the bible belt, they have those long narrow roads where people drive their truck 100 mph from church to the country corn liquor still every sunday and one of his kids would probably be pogo sticking or skateboarding...Atheist, if you move over here you have to start getting those kids on microwave food and games that will put fat on them and deprive them of light and vitamin d:Yawn:

[The Atheist]

...So Atheist, are you planning to move from sunny NZ anytime soon?

No.

:D

First off, I really doubt I'd be allowed in.


It is crazy. the interest rate on mortgage are at all time lows. I could swear I heard 3 to 4% recently on the news. We had re financed our home a few years ago when the rates were at 5.25% thinking that it would certainly not go lower than that.

You could have the same interest rates as Japan - about 0.1%. Imagine the mortgage payments on that sucker?



Atheist, you should consider settling in the Bible Belt. It might do you some good! ha

.

Getting shot is good?


Atheist, if you move over here you have to start getting those kids on microwave food and games that will put fat on them and deprive them of light and vitamin d:Yawn:

Oh god, they'll never fit in then. They have fast food about twice a year, live outside and we don't even own a microwave! (horrible, taste-destroying machines)

[OrphanPip]

My brother was considering buying property in Rochester because they're going at something like 20,000 a year, says they'd pay for themselves in 5 years of rents. Seems like a pain to manage property across the border though. Some connections have got him an offer for an office building downtown for only 1.2 million, which might be a good buy. You need to make 60% down payment on commercial though because banks don't like to take on risk.

[The Atheist]

My brother was considering buying property in Rochester because they're going at something like 20,000 a year, says they'd pay for themselves in 5 years of rents. Seems like a pain to manage property across the border though. Some connections have got him an offer for an office building downtown for only 1.2 million, which might be a good buy. You need to make 60% down payment on commercial though because banks don't like to take on risk.

Given the prices, I think residential rentals in USA must be pretty attractive.

If we were a lot closer to it it's certainly where I'd be heading for investment.

[The Atheist]

Paul:

What's this I see about councils wanting to sell allotment land? I see a large group of angry men with pitchforks confronting councillors!

[soundofmusic]

No.

:D

First off, I really doubt I'd be allowed in.

Getting shot is good?

Oh god, they'll never fit in then. They have fast food about twice a year, live outside and we don't even own a microwave! (horrible, taste-destroying machines)

I doubt if any of the bible belt blokes would want to tangle with a rough, tough, NZ bloke like you; remember, our folks get their brawn from potatos and beer.
Not own a microwave, oh my god, what do they eat when they come home from school...no microwave pizzas, little microwave potato skins...:confused:


My brother was considering buying property in Rochester because they're going at something like 20,000 a year, says they'd pay for themselves in 5 years of rents. Seems like a pain to manage property across the border though. Some connections have got him an offer for an office building downtown for only 1.2 million, which might be a good buy. You need to make 60% down payment on commercial though because banks don't like to take on risk.

Now, at least down here, there seems like there is more property than renters; I don't know about the rest of the country. Most of the buyers a few years ago were from out of the country and then they have a management person or company to run the day to day operations. I don't know how much they clear after paying a middle man though.

[DocHeart]

I've had one of the worst Mondays of my career.

Last one this bad was when I was 18. During a summer job cleaning swimming pools on Corfu, a waiter thought it would be funny if he substituted the big plastic bottle of pool detergent with a similar one that contained diesel. Then I broke his face with a punch, but also my own finger. After being treated by a fat guy who seemed to take pleasure in resetting bones and causing his patients unspeakable pain, I got arrested for assault and was sued by the hotel owner for losing him revenue (he had to close the pool for two days). My parents flew out to get me out of a cell and back home.

That was 20 years ago. Today was a little worse than that.

Hey Jack. Get me a double Teacher's. Not too many rocks.

[Paulclem]

Paul:

What's this I see about councils wanting to sell allotment land? I see a large group of angry men with pitchforks confronting councillors!

I haven't heard about this. But fear not - I and my compadres will be standing firm, tools at the ready...

[Paulclem]

I've had one of the worst Mondays of my career.

Last one this bad was when I was 18. During a summer job cleaning swimming pools on Corfu, a waiter thought it would be funny if he substituted the big plastic bottle of pool detergent with a similar one that contained diesel. Then I broke his face with a punch, but also my own finger. After being treated by a fat guy who seemed to take pleasure in resetting bones and causing his patients unspeakable pain, I got arrested for assault and was sued by the hotel owner for losing him revenue (he had to close the pool for two days). My parents flew out to get me out of a cell and back home.

That was 20 years ago. Today was a little worse than that.

Hey Jack. Get me a double Teacher's. Not too many rocks.

Parker will always supply the drinks you need in this thread - no problem.

I hope the problems turn out ok,

[The Atheist]

I doubt if any of the bible belt blokes would want to tangle with a rough, tough, NZ bloke like you; remember, our folks get their brawn from potatos and beer.

And guns. ;)

Rule #1 of blokedom is "Don't do a Peter Blake and take a pop-gun to a machine-gun fight." The bigger you are, the bigger target you are!

and many other cliches...


Not own a microwave, oh my god, what do they eat when they come home from school...no microwave pizzas, little microwave potato skins...:confused:

Usually fruit plus a sandwich or crackers. I would be the first to admit that our children are somewhat weird. They are one set of very few kids that don't take pre-packaged lunches to school and then have them after school as well. ("She" is taking one of daddy's home-made meat and vegetable pies to school today.)

They had some chocolate at Easter.


Now, at least down here, there seems like there is more property than renters; I don't know about the rest of the country. Most of the buyers a few years ago were from out of the country and then they have a management person or company to run the day to day operations. I don't know how much they clear after paying a middle man though.

That's the story everywhere. It raises the question to me: where the hell did everyone go?

I have to assume that these properties were occupied at some time, so where are all the people displaced from all the hundreds of thousands of vacant properties? Moved in with other family members?


I've had one of the worst Mondays of my career.

Mate, that doesn't sound good.

I'll get Parker to fix you a stiff one.


Last one this bad was when I was 18. During a summer job cleaning swimming pools on Corfu, a waiter thought it would be funny if he substituted the big plastic bottle of pool detergent with a similar one that contained diesel. Then I broke his face with a punch, but also my own finger. After being treated by a fat guy who seemed to take pleasure in resetting bones and causing his patients unspeakable pain, I got arrested for assault and was sued by the hotel owner for losing him revenue (he had to close the pool for two days). My parents flew out to get me out of a cell and back home.

That was 20 years ago. Today was a little worse than that.

Hey Jack. Get me a double Teacher's. Not too many rocks.

Please, "Parker", not Jack. We have a few standards to uphold!

:D

And going by that now being the second-worst day, this one must have been a doozy.

Good luck with it!

[DocHeart]

Please, "Parker", not Jack. We have a few standards to uphold!




That's what I meant. Parker. He's a good man. :)

[The Atheist]

Glad to see you're still.....

here!

:D

Post more! Someone from where the sun shines more than not's always a good thing - the rest of us, apart from Sound, live in cold, damp places. Bring the sunshine!

That pic works, I imagine Sound will be on her way shortly.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...Post more! Someone from where the sun shines more than not's always a good thing...


http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/Jackrabbit.jpg

.

[prendrelemick]

^How things have changed for Marlboro Man.



Hang on Atheist we're having a drought here in sunny Britain.

[Janine]

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/Jackrabbit.jpg

.

Gilliatt, really funny! This post card reminds me of the 'Rabbit Proof Fence' story in Australia - ever see how many rabbits they now have? I heard all of them were imports. Now we have stink bugs - also an import - from China - and very undesirable. :ack2: Seems there are no natural predadors for the 'stinky' bugs here in the US...yuk! I collect old post cards like this one - love that old painted photo look!

[The Atheist]

Hang on Atheist we're having a drought here in sunny Britain.

Yes, I see you guys have found the sun.

Bad time to have drought conditions, but I bet you already knew that. Spring was much the same here with many farmers struggling to make hay.


Gilliatt, really funny! This post card reminds me of the 'Rabbit Proof Fence' story in Australia - ever see how many rabbits they now have? I heard all of them were imports.

You can keep those stink bugs!

Yes, rabbits are a huge problem in NZ and Australia and yep, they all came by boat. Early settlers thought "Wouldn't it be nice to be able to go and shoot a rabbit every now and then?"

Alas, the rabbits liked our weather a bit too much and there are now billions of the damned things.

[soundofmusic]

I've had one of the worst Mondays of my career.

Last one this bad was when I was 18. During a summer job cleaning swimming pools on Corfu, a waiter thought it would be funny if he substituted the big plastic bottle of pool detergent with a similar one that contained diesel. Then I broke his face with a punch, but also my own finger. After being treated by a fat guy who seemed to take pleasure in resetting bones and causing his patients unspeakable pain, I got arrested for assault and was sued by the hotel owner for losing him revenue (he had to close the pool for two days). My parents flew out to get me out of a cell and back home.

That was 20 years ago. Today was a little worse than that.

Hey Jack. Get me a double Teacher's. Not too many rocks.

Sounds awful, so what happened today...tell us before Parker mixes one of his special memory obscuring specials...


Parker will always supply the drinks you need in this thread - no problem.

I hope the problems turn out ok,

Actually, I have a bone to pick with Parker; he hasn't been returning my phone calls and recently, I heard he's setting up housekeeping in Pauls shed with some young wench from up Jockys way...might be Mrs J's cousin...


And guns. ;)

Rule #1 of blokedom is "Don't do a Peter Blake and take a pop-gun to a machine-gun fight." The bigger you are, the bigger target you are!

and many other cliches...



Usually fruit plus a sandwich or crackers. I would be the first to admit that our children are somewhat weird. They are one set of very few kids that don't take pre-packaged lunches to school and then have them after school as well. ("She" is taking one of daddy's home-made meat and vegetable pies to school today.)

They had some chocolate at Easter.

That's the story everywhere. It raises the question to me: where the hell did everyone go?

I have to assume that these properties were occupied at some time, so where are all the people displaced from all the hundreds of thousands of vacant properties? Moved in with other family members?




That's why your children have such wonderful skin and bright eyes; do the kids ever crave junk food?
What seems to be happening here is that multiple families are moving into single family dwellings or single family dwellings are being cut into small apartments.


http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/Jackrabbit.jpg

.

Now that is my kind of cowboy...

^How things have changed for Marlboro Man.



Hang on Atheist we're having a drought here in sunny Britain.

Well, in my head, the 50's still rein supreme...

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

^How things have changed for Marlboro Man.


Yes, times have changed for Marlboro man. Now he smokes electronic cigarettes and keeps his USB battery charger in the saddle bag.


Gilliatt, really funny! This post card reminds me of the 'Rabbit Proof Fence' story in Australia - ever see how many rabbits they now have? I heard all of them were imports. Now we have stink bugs

Glad you enjoyed it, there's plenty more from where that came from.


Yes, I see you guys have found the sun.

Yes, rabbits are a huge problem in NZ and Australia and yep, they all came by boat. Alas, the rabbits liked our weather a bit too much and there are now billions of the damned things.

We have several cotton tails that roam our neighborhood and creek, but up to now, they haven't been too much of a bother.


...I heard he's setting up housekeeping in Pauls shed with some young wench from up Jockys way...

Now that is my kind of cowboy...
Well, in my head, the 50's still rein supreme...

Where is Jocky by the way?
Paul...was he in fact hanging out in your shed?
Have you even dared to open it?

If you like that kind of Cowboy, you should see my Uncle who lives out west. He rides a Jackalope.

.

[soundofmusic]

Yes, times have changed for Marlboro man. Now he smokes electronic cigarettes and keeps his USB battery charger in the saddle bag.



Glad you enjoyed it, there's plenty more from where that came from.



We have several cotton tails that roam our neighborhood and creek, but up to now, they haven't been too much of a bother.



Where is Jocky by the way?
Paul...was he in fact hanging out in your shed?
Have you even dared to open it?

If you like that kind of Cowboy, you should see my Uncle who lives out west. He rides a Jackalope.

.

Up until the rumors of Jocky in Pauls shed, I'd heard nothing of him. Aye, it must have been your uncle I was hollering at one night, there was a horrendous lightening storm and the jackalopes were all drinking whiskey and making love; I saw a feller in the saddle and I yelled out "Come inside you dade burn fool; but he paid me no mind; next thing I saw was his hair lighting up....

[Paulclem]

Up until the rumors of Jocky in Pauls shed, I'd heard nothing of him. Aye, it must have been your uncle I was hollering at one night, there was a horrendous lightening storm and the jackalopes were all drinking whiskey and making love; I saw a feller in the saddle and I yelled out "Come inside you dade burn fool; but he paid me no mind; next thing I saw was his hair lighting up....

In my shed?!! I hope he brought his own bed. The floor is a little... earthen.

I also hope he hasn't been into my spiced rum. A bloke's got to have a nip in his coffee on a busy day.

[prendrelemick]

Ey up Paul, if you tune into the Challenge Cup match this afternoon, you may see me in the crowd. Look for a, burly, bearded, balding, bloke in a Halifax shirt... only problem is, that just about discribes everyone who'll be there.

[The Atheist]

Ey up Paul, if you tune into the Challenge Cup match this afternoon, you may see me in the crowd. Look for a, burly, bearded, balding, bloke in a Halifax shirt... only problem is, that just about discribes everyone who'll be there.

I thought everybody had dressed like you because it was a special occasion!

[Paulclem]

Ey up Paul, if you tune into the Challenge Cup match this afternoon, you may see me in the crowd. Look for a, burly, bearded, balding, bloke in a Halifax shirt... only problem is, that just about discribes everyone who'll be there.

Ey up. Missed it. The daytime hours are when the TV is a no-go. I get it post 9pm when Mrs Paulclem and my daughter have retired to their boudoirs. Just read that they lost to Bradford. Pity that.

[Paulclem]

I discovered a new tool today - or rather I began to appreciate its fine design. It has a long shaft - rough for a firm grip, with a rounded end that bends at the end. Yes - it's a potato spade. I'd never heard of one before, and wondered what it was bequeathed in the shed. I suspected that the fellow had been of giant proportions, but no I was wrong. Vic - in the allotment shop - informed me that it was a potato spade and very useful.

So I tried it today, and he was right. The bend in the shovel end ploughs the earth over the potato leaves to earth them up in a very easy motion. The length means that I can reach right into the middle of my rows. Brilliant.

http://www.online-literature.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=932&pictureid=8841

[prendrelemick]

That's a French shovel. Unlike us hard working British shovellers, the french preferred to put a bend in their shovel rather than in their backs. Also popular in Cornwall.


You know, I have no idea how I know this stuff.

[Paulclem]

That's a French shovel. Unlike us hard working British shovellers, the french preferred to put a bend in their shovel rather than in their backs. Also popular in Cornwall.


You know, I have no idea how I know this stuff.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kzn3KaO2Vyk

Shared heritage - shovels.

Well I'm glad of the bend in it. My back was killing me after digging another bed for my taties. I put another 3K of charlottes in today.

The ground in the new half of the allotment has a lot of couch grass. Apparently the old guys call it twitch, though there's no indication as to why. Perhaps it makes them twitch.

[prendrelemick]

Oh God, I think I know that as well. I have become Eric.

A twitch is a short lengh of rough twisted home made rope, usually made of straw, coiled up round your hand and used to rub down horses. It has other ropey/stringy conotations too.

The roots (rhyzome) of couch grass resemble a hairy rope, or indeed are strong enough to be used as string

[Paulclem]

Oh God, I think I know that as well. I have become Eric.

A twitch is a short lengh of rough twisted home made rope, usually made of straw, coiled up round your hand and used to rub down horses. It has other ropey/stringy conotations too.

The roots (rhyzome) of couch grass resemble a hairy rope, or indeed are strong enough to be used as string

That's brilliant. I'll be able to tell the woman on the committee who was wondering about it. They do resemble hairy rope. I've got piles of it where I've dug out the beds.

Thanks Mick.

By the way, have you heard the expression:

"Tha'll go to mass" as a kind of threat? My Dad used to use it, and in the book club we've come across "By the mass" as a mild cuss.

[The Atheist]

I discovered a new tool today - or rather I began to appreciate its fine design.

I can taste those spuds already!

Can you use glyphosate on the allotment? A bit of that around the edges will make your life a lot easier!


They do resemble hairy rope.

Crikey, I'd be careful who I said that to!

[DocHeart]

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

Anonymous

[Paulclem]

I can taste those spuds already!

Can you use glyphosate on the allotment? A bit of that around the edges will make your life a lot easier!



Crikey, I'd be careful who I said that to!

I could, although I don't want to. It's hard work keeping the grass and weeds down - and I'm still digging the second bit, so I haven't done that much. I'll get the strimmer on it next week hopefully.

In the long term, I hope to put down that black weed suppressant material with gravel perhaps on the paths. I think we're a way away from that though.

The maincrop is just coming through too. I was chuffed with last year's crop.

[The Atheist]

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

Anonymous

Always liked that one!

[The Atheist]

The maincrop is just coming through too. I was chuffed with last year's crop.

So, we should be ready in about 10 weeks?

Send my dinner invite; I'll get flights organised now!

[prendrelemick]

"Yes" is the answer.

Anonymous



Not tonight dear, is often the answer I get.

[Paulclem]

So, we should be ready in about 10 weeks?

Send my dinner invite; I'll get flights organised now!

It'll be barbie time in England - unless we've had summer already. A few baked potatoes and whatever you want. We'll get Parker to buy a few barrels in.

[soundofmusic]

In my shed?!! I hope he brought his own bed. The floor is a little... earthen.

I also hope he hasn't been into my spiced rum. A bloke's got to have a nip in his coffee on a busy day.

No doubt he's laying on his little wool kilt, finishing off that spiced rum right now; what say we take our shovels and hoes and storm the shed:reddevil:


Ey up Paul, if you tune into the Challenge
Cup match this afternoon, you may see me in the crowd. Look for a, burly, bearded, balding, bloke in a Halifax shirt... only problem is, that just about discribes everyone who'll be there.

Aye, I saw you, you were the furry bloke mooning the cameras:nono::blush::cheers2:


I thought everybody had dressed like you because it was a special occasion!

That's why he had his initials shaved on his...ar.....:sosp:


I discovered a new tool today - or rather I began to appreciate its fine design. It has a long shaft - rough for a firm grip, with a rounded end that bends at the end. Yes - it's a potato spade. I'd never heard of one before, and wondered what it was bequeathed in the shed. I suspected that the fellow had been of giant proportions, but no I was wrong. Vic - in the allotment shop - informed me that it was a potato spade and very useful.

So I tried it today, and he was right. The bend in the shovel end ploughs the earth over the potato leaves to earth them up in a very easy motion. The length means that I can reach right into the middle of my rows. Brilliant.

http://www.online-literature.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=932&pictureid=8841

That beautiful patch of raw earth brings tears to me eyes...


Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question. "Yes" is the answer.

Anonymous

Somebody give this man 20 lashes, don't you know you never put "sex" as a question...the earth would still not be peopled:yikes:

[prendrelemick]

Aye, I saw you, you were the furry bloke mooning the cameras:nono::blush::cheers2:



That's why he had his initials shaved on his...ar.....:sosp:



:


No that was my face

[Paulclem]

No that was my face

:lol:

Would that self-assfacement?

[jocky]

I've had one of the worst Mondays of my career.

Last one this bad was when I was 18. During a summer job cleaning swimming pools on Corfu, a waiter thought it would be funny if he substituted the big plastic bottle of pool detergent with a similar one that contained diesel. Then I broke his face with a punch, but also my own finger. After being treated by a fat guy who seemed to take pleasure in resetting bones and causing his patients unspeakable pain, I got arrested for assault and was sued by the hotel owner for losing him revenue (he had to close the pool for two days). My parents flew out to get me out of a cell and back home.

That was 20 years ago. Today was a little worse than that.

Hey Jack. Get me a double Teacher's. Not too many rocks.

Punching a waiter in the face is never good even if he did try to poison you, and getting bailed out by your Ma and Da is reprehensible. Perhaps the poor guy was simply trying to point out your youthful errors i.e. drinking Jack Daniels. Atheist, standards are slipping. Am I still in purdah, the Teachers reference was badly misunderstood and I am a PALE shadow of my former self? We are not a bad bunch to have on your side.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyiLfSHSqds

[soundofmusic]

No that was my face

:smilielol5: ooh, ah, there must have been a large verticle crack on the camera lens :smilielol5:

:lol:

Would that self-assfacement?

:smilielol5::yesnod:

Punching a waiter in the face is never good even if he did try to poison you, and getting bailed out by your Ma and Da is reprehensible. Perhaps the poor guy was simply trying to point out your youthful errors i.e. drinking Jack Daniels. Atheist, standards are slipping. Am I still in purdah, the Teachers reference was badly misunderstood and I am a PALE shadow of my former self? We are not a bad bunch to have on your side.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UyiLfSHSqds

So that wasn't you in Pauls shed, nor your kilt on his floor? Then I guess this isn't your wallet full of bills I found next to the kilt either:smilielol5:

[jocky]

So that wasn't you in Pauls shed, nor your kilt on his floor? Then I guess this isn't your wallet full of bills I found next to the kilt either:smilielol5:

No way, I believe it may have been Mick's he is worn out by the sheep and all that lambing. As to the wallet it could be mine, you never know there is a lot goes on in sheds that is never mentioned. What Paul gets up to with fallen kilts is none of my business, I just hope he is teaching rich thickos how to wangle there way to Oxbridge. Duh :D

[prendrelemick]

A yorkshireman and his wallet are rarely separated.
So thats where you've been. A man in a kilt, in purdah, I can see how that could happen. I hope you will still have time for us in your struggle for independence Jocky - couldn't you at least wait till we've nicked all the oil!:smilewinkgrin:




On second thoughts, sod the oil, just keep sending the whisky.

[jocky]

I hope you will still have time for us in your struggle for independence Jocky - couldn't you at least wait till we've nicked all the oil!:smilewinkgrin:




On second thoughts, sod the oil, just keep sending the whisky.

I think the Scottish election result reflected the good work done by Alex Salmond and the S.N.P. rather than any popular desire for independence. I am afraid divorce is not on the cards just yet. :cheers2:

The mere thought of exporting our whisky sends a shiver down my spine but unlike oil it will never run out. :)

[Paulclem]

No way, I believe it may have been Mick's he is worn out by the sheep and all that lambing. As to the wallet it could be mine, you never know there is a lot goes on in sheds that is never mentioned. What Paul gets up to with fallen kilts is none of my business, I just hope he is teaching rich thickos how to wangle there way to Oxbridge. Duh :D

Alas the rich thickos won't have me. i didn't go to the right school. Thornes House comprehensive in Wakefield was having strikes/ riots by the kids in my first year there. We in the top band were in the classroom murdering French with our thick accents and refusal to pronounce ou properly, whilst the other classes were running around the school, avoiding teachers, giving raucous interviews to the press and having fun.

[The Atheist]

We in the top band were in the classroom murdering French with our thick accents ...

Thanks to my ability to mimic voices, I ended up with what I'm assured is an upper-class French accent.

Which goes nicely with my lower-class English one!

:D


We are not a bad bunch to have on your side.

Is that if the sport is boat-races with whisky?

[prendrelemick]

Ah wee paul, je connais exactement quelle vous est ditting.

[Paulclem]

Ah wee paul, je connais exactement quelle vous est ditting.

Wee. ( I can hear Eric Ostlethwaite's Dad in that pronunciation). Je suis Monsieur Pomme-de-Terre.

My French now is from the Eddie Izzard Book of French.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x1sQkEfAdfY

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...The mere thought of exporting our whisky sends a shiver down my spine but unlike oil it will never run out.

Welcome back Jocky!
I'm not complaining about your exports.


Wee. ( I can hear Eric Ostlethwaite's Dad in that pronunciation). Je suis Monsieur Pomme-de-Terre.

My French now is from the Eddie Izzard Book of French.


I am familiar with some Cajun French. Here's a sampling:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3wuSO59OdM&feature=related

.

[jocky]

Welcome back Jocky!
I'm not complaining about your exports.



I am familiar with some Cajun French. Here's a sampling:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3wuSO59OdM&feature=related

.

Cheers Gilliatt, here is some Cajun from one of my favourite films, enjoy.http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5sP5RJHuUBg

[Paulclem]

Welcome back Jocky!
I'm not complaining about your exports.



I am familiar with some Cajun French. Here's a sampling:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3wuSO59OdM&feature=related

.

About as discernible as our Yorkshire French.

[soundofmusic]

A yorkshireman and his wallet are rarely separated.
So thats where you've been. A man in a kilt, in purdah, I can see how that could happen. I hope you will still have time for us in your struggle for independence Jocky - couldn't you at least wait till we've nicked all the oil!:smilewinkgrin:

On second thoughts, sod the oil, just keep sending the whisky.

I don't know whether it is just bad luck; but I haven't ever met a man who was easily separated from his wallet. I find the only way is too ply them with liquor, put them to bed, promise them a night of wild antics, then make off with their trunks when they are snoring away the next morning, though usually, the belt buckle clinking gives you away....:(


I think the Scottish election result reflected the good work done by Alex Salmond and the S.N.P. rather than any popular desire for independence. I am afraid divorce is not on the cards just yet. :cheers2:

The mere thought of exporting our whisky sends a shiver down my spine but unlike oil it will never run out. :)

Which reminds me, where does a man keep his wallet when he wears a kilt?


Alas the rich thickos won't have me. i didn't go to the right school. Thornes House comprehensive in Wakefield was having strikes/ riots by the kids in my first year there. We in the top band were in the classroom murdering French with our thick accents and refusal to pronounce ou properly, whilst the other classes were running around the school, avoiding teachers, giving raucous interviews to the press and having fun.

Then come to america, we say ou ...owww....and all we want is a fellow who knows how to use a french spade.


Thanks to my ability to mimic voices, I ended up with what I'm assured is an upper-class French accent.

Which goes nicely with my lower-class English one!

:D

Is that if the sport is boat-races with whisky?

What do we use the whiskey for, to drink or to start the engines?


Welcome back Jocky!
I'm not complaining about your exports.



I am familiar with some Cajun French. Here's a sampling:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n3wuSO59OdM&feature=related

.

Haha, Did you ever see that Cajun chef on television, I loved him.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...Haha, Did you ever see that Cajun chef on television, I loved him.

You talkin bout Jussin Wilsuhn? ..."Hi yall are?"

My mother and used to watch this guy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZX3Y27LXFYw

.

[The Atheist]

What do we use the whiskey for, to drink or to start the engines?

Haha! Different sort of boat races.

The guys line up sitting cross-legged on the floor, behind each other, just like a rowing eight.

The first one drinks his glass dry, slamming it down when empty, which is the start for #2, and so on.

Great fun when you're about 18.

[Paulclem]

Haha! Different sort of boat races.

The guys line up sitting cross-legged on the floor, behind each other, just like a rowing eight.

The first one drinks his glass dry, slamming it down when empty, which is the start for #2, and so on.

Great fun when you're about 18.

Did you ever do that rowing dance with the Gap Band?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-N19NmO3NP4

[The Atheist]

Did you ever do that rowing dance with the Gap Band?

No, never heard it before. We never really listened to any US music.

Apart from Meatloaf.

:D

[DocHeart]

I knew a guy who never cut his toenails unless he was going on a first date.

[jocky]

I knew a guy who never cut his toenails unless he was going on a first date.

:lol:

That is a concession too far, " this was some time known as a paradox " as our female counterparts would never dream of cutting their toenails on any date. I'm a toe-man deh deh deh deh, deh deh deh deh.

[jocky]

Which reminds me, where does a man keep his wallet when he wears his kilt

In our right hand sock under our sgian-dhub. :)

[prendrelemick]

[QUOTE=soundofmusic;1034446]I don't know whether it is just bad luck; but I haven't ever met a man who was easily separated from his wallet. I find the only way is too ply them with liquor, put them to bed, promise them a night of wild antics, then make off with their trunks when they are snoring away the next morning, though usually, the belt buckle clinking gives you away....:(



[QUOTE]

:lol:

And they say romance is dead.:ladysman:

[Paulclem]

I knew a guy who never cut his toenails unless he was going on a first date.

On the first date??!!

[DocHeart]

On the first date??!!

No, no. Before it. In the bathroom. While rehearsing his lines.

Parker, will you do a round for the gentlemen, please. And whatever ladies may have, how to put it, strayed in. On my tab. Hey, don't give me that look. I've owed you more in the past and I did pay it back, didn't I? Start pouring. Chop-chop.

[jocky]

Parker, will you do a round for the gentlemen, please. And whatever ladies may have, how to put it, strayed in. On my tab. Hey, don't give me that look. I've owed you more in the past and I did pay it back, didn't I? Start pouring. Chop-chop.

Why that is very kind of you Doc, I don't mind if I do, make mine a double Glenmorangie on the rocks. Aaah! that was good. Er, are you sure you have cleared this with Parker ? I have heard from a very reliable source that the last fellow who tried to rip him off was found bound and decapitated on the outskirts of Aukland. Cheers :)

The weather has been very strange in Jockland of late, the sun has actually been shining. I have been able to relax in the recliner in the back garden , with a cold beer, watching Mrs Jocky mowing the lawn. She is very good at it and I always encourage her by shouting the immortal phrase, Darling, you've missed a bit. Ouch! what was that for ?

[The Atheist]

No, no. Before it. In the bathroom. While rehearsing his lines.

That sounds too personal to be a "my friend" story!

:D


Parker, will you do a round for the gentlemen, please.

Jolly decent of you!


Why that is very kind of you Doc, I don't mind if I do, make mine a double Glenmorangie on the rocks. Aaah! that was good.

I'm having the same, good choice. I hope Doc knows how much this all costs!


Er, are you sure you have cleared this with Parker ? I have heard from a very reliable source that the last fellow who tried to rip him off was found bound and decapitated on the outskirts of Aukland. Cheers :)

That is nothing but malicious rumour! The fact his will had just been changed to the benefit of The Blokes' Club was entirely coincidental.


The weather has been very strange in Jockland of late, the sun has actually been shining. I have been able to relax in the recliner in the back garden , with a cold beer, watching Mrs Jocky mowing the lawn. She is very good at it and I always encourage her by shouting the immortal phrase, Darling, you've missed a bit. Ouch! what was that for ?

Sun in Scotland?

It's giving you respite before the Gulf Stream dies off and Scotland reverts to glaciation.

Mrs Jocky will cope - she can pull the wood on a sled.

[Paulclem]

:lol:

I'll have the same too seeing as we haven't used up the bequests fund.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Checking in.

That last round Doc ordered up was mighty good, but it has me seeing double...no make that seeing deca's. Have you blokes noticed all the Fahrenheit 451 entries under general Literature?

What's the latest coming out of the allotments Paul?

I reckon I better sign off for tonight.

.

[DocHeart]

Checking in.

That last round Doc ordered up was mighty good, but it has me seeing double...no make that seeing deca's. Have you blokes noticed all the Fahrenheit 451 entries under general Literature?




Yea, what is up with that? Someone must tell Ray Bradbury, he'd be chuffed to bits.

[Paulclem]

Checking in.

That last round Doc ordered up was mighty good, but it has me seeing double...no make that seeing deca's. Have you blokes noticed all the Fahrenheit 451 entries under general Literature?

What's the latest coming out of the allotments Paul?

I reckon I better sign off for tonight.

.

The broad beans haven't done well - put in too late with all the hot wearther we've been having here. The driest for 100 years or so.

The potatoes, on the other hand are doing great.

I've still got quite a bit to dig in the new half, but I've got lettuce, kale, beetroot and cabbage in there now.

It is looking very untidy, as the grass has grown quite big, but I'll be strimming it this weekend hopefully.

[DocHeart]

The broad beans haven't done well - put in too late with all the hot wearther we've been having here. The driest for 100 years or so.

The potatoes, on the other hand are doing great.

I've still got quite a bit to dig in the new half, but I've got lettuce, kale, beetroot and cabbage in there now.

It is looking very untidy, as the grass has grown quite big, but I'll be strimming it this weekend hopefully.


So, what do you do?

:)

[Paulclem]

So, what do you do?

:)

My wife's brought on the aubergines and courgettes. We've also got cabbage and lettuce to go in, so we've got lots nstead. Pity about the broad beans. They're great young and tender in a salad.

[soundofmusic]

You talkin bout Jussin Wilsuhn? ..."Hi yall are?"

My mother and used to watch this guy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZX3Y27LXFYw

.

Thank you, Gilliatt, I love Justin! I've put him in my recipe file now...I never noticed he had that scar up the side of his head. I'm going to use a few of his recipes, though, I'm going to cut out about a pound of grease out of each...


Haha! Different sort of boat races.

The guys line up sitting cross-legged on the floor, behind each other, just like a rowing eight.

The first one drinks his glass dry, slamming it down when empty, which is the start for #2, and so on.

Great fun when you're about 18.

I learn something new every day on this thread. I should think your boat might get a bit wet inside by the 6th or 7th glass, since I'm not at al confident that the fellows can uncross their legs and take a run by then.


Did you ever do that rowing dance with the Gap Band?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-N19NmO3NP4

I'm waiting to see you do that dance, Paul


I knew a guy who never cut his toenails unless he was going on a first date.

I guess he was hoping to get lucky on the first date. I think it must be quite a common habit, I noticed my young men were usually reluctant to take off their socks...they claimed it was cold feet or ugly feet. I often wished they would take off their socks since alot of fellows don't seem to realize that they need to change their socks everytime they change their shorts.


:lol:

That is a concession too far, " this was some time known as a paradox " as our female counterparts would never dream of cutting their toenails on any date. I'm a toe-man deh deh deh deh, deh deh deh deh.

I always did my nails and toenails; but I only shaved my legs if the fellow was special :brow:


In our right hand sock under our sgian-dhub. :)

I think I might need you to draw a diagram...don't think I've seen that part in grays anatomy haha


[QUOTE=soundofmusic;1034446]I don't know whether it is just bad luck; but I haven't ever met a man who was easily separated from his wallet. I find the only way is too ply them with liquor, put them to bed, promise them a night of wild antics, then make off with their trunks when they are snoring away the next morning, though usually, the belt buckle clinking gives you away....:(



[QUOTE]

:lol:

And they say romance is dead.:ladysman:

Yes, unfortunately a lady has to keep her head about her, check for phone numbers and pictures before you give your heart; men are just far too clever and unlike women, they stick together.


On the first date??!!

See, great minds do think alike.


No, no. Before it. In the bathroom. While rehearsing his lines.

Parker, will you do a round for the gentlemen, please. And whatever ladies may have, how to put it, strayed in. On my tab. Hey, don't give me that look. I've owed you more in the past and I did pay it back, didn't I? Start pouring. Chop-chop.

Ah ha...so you are the reason Parker couldn't take me to Hawaii this weekend; he took me to a hot dog stand and I said, no sir, I am not cutting my toenails for this.


Why that is very kind of you Doc, I don't mind if I do, make mine a double Glenmorangie on the rocks. Aaah! that was good. Er, are you sure you have cleared this with Parker ? I have heard from a very reliable source that the last fellow who tried to rip him off was found bound and decapitated on the outskirts of Aukland. Cheers :)

The weather has been very strange in Jockland of late, the sun has actually been shining. I have been able to relax in the recliner in the back garden , with a cold beer, watching Mrs Jocky mowing the lawn. She is very good at it and I always encourage her by shouting the immortal phrase, Darling, you've missed a bit. Ouch! what was that for ?

I was wondering where my third husband got off too; ah well, good thing I and Parker got him to fill out that million dollar life insurance policy...

I see Mrs J gave your beautiful long locks a bit of a trim while she was mowing too...the Scottish lasses are so clever.


The broad beans haven't done well - put in too late with all the hot wearther we've been having here. The driest for 100 years or so.

The potatoes, on the other hand are doing great.

I've still got quite a bit to dig in the new half, but I've got lettuce, kale, beetroot and cabbage in there now.

It is looking very untidy, as the grass has grown quite big, but I'll be strimming it this weekend hopefully.

What sort of weather is good for potatos; I thought you needed plenty of water.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

The broad beans haven't done well - put in too late with all the hot wearther we've been having here....
...It is looking very untidy, as the grass has grown quite big, but I'll be strimming it this weekend hopefully.

Forgive me if I missed an update somewhere along the way, but what about the cottages? Are they still standing? or were you in fact planning to use thenm or at least one?



Thank you, Gilliatt, I love Justin! I've put him in my recipe file now...I never noticed he had that scar up the side of his head. I'm going to use a few of his recipes, though, I'm going to cut out about a pound of grease out of each...



I could feel my arteries seizing up just watching that episode!! The scar was probably from wrangling an alligator or a Capybara.

.

[The Atheist]

Have you blokes noticed all the Fahrenheit 451 entries under general Literature?

I don't know where it started, but for years, every summer one class at least will be told by the teacher to come here and discuss some aspect of 1984 or Animal Farm.

Saves the teachers thinking.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

I had a hunch it may be related to a school assignment.
Hows the weather down NZ way?...oh and how's the playhouse holding up?

.

[soundofmusic]

Forgive me if I missed an update somewhere along the way, but what about the cottages? Are they still standing? or were you in fact planning to use thenm or at least one?



I could feel my arteries seizing up just watching that episode!! The scar was probably from wrangling an alligator or a Capybara.

.

I am always surprised when I see the creole ladies down our way boiling down all these nasty animal parts, putting tons of hot sauce in a pot and then, would you believe it, by the end of the day a glorious smell and glaze at the bottom of the pot and meat that falls off the bone.
Oh my god, a Capybara, never heard of such a thing...how frightening, a stone age looking rat..akkk


I don't know where it started, but for years, every summer one class at least will be told by the teacher to come here and discuss some aspect of 1984 or Animal Farm.

Saves the teachers thinking.

I have to get over there and check all this out; I must admit, I am quite ashamed of myself, I never even look at literature now that I am on a literature forum.


I had a hunch it may be related to a school assignment.
Hows the weather down NZ way?...oh and how's the playhouse holding up?

.

Oh yes, the playhouse...I am curious. Atheists children look like Angels who dropped out of heaven; but if the son hasn't decided to take his tools to it; Baje is probably using it as a skateboard ramp haha

[The Atheist]

Hows the weather down NZ way?...oh and how's the playhouse holding up?

.

The weather, for the start of winter, has been amazing. The few bad days we've had have been really bad, but most of the time, it's still more autumnal than winter.

Great to ask, because yesterday was a stunner, so we went to the beach, with this result:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/kahawai1.jpg

All her own work, on a 6-lb test line, the fish weighing about 4 pounds. It's a kahawai by its local name, but internationally, it'd be called a sea trout, because they fight just like a trout, leaping out of the water and going on huge runs.

Her arms were a bit tired at the end of it, but a superb catch, eaten for dinner in a kahawai and spinach quiche!

The playhouse has been taken down as we're going to move. Just waiting for the right house.


Oh yes, the playhouse...I am curious. Atheists children look like Angels who dropped out of heaven; but if the son hasn't decided to take his tools to it; Baje is probably using it as a skateboard ramp haha

:lol:

Her skateboarding has a little way to go before she's doing jumps. Ollie is still an unattainable target at the moment.

She can half fish though! You shoulda seen her - reeling in, letting it run; just like an old pro. She got a bigger fish as well, and that's a very small set she's using. A+

[prendrelemick]

Fantastic!

[Paulclem]

Forgive me if I missed an update somewhere along the way, but what about the cottages? Are they still standing? or were you in fact planning to use thenm or at least one?

.

Ivy cottage is being used by the old Guy next to me. He asked me if he could keep his tools there, and that's no problem. THE Shed is way big enough for our needs.

The fallout bunker is still there too. I'll take it down eventually, but I'm still digging patches for whatever's got to go in. I'm behind with the work, but we're getting there. The runner beans my wife has grown are big and healthy. The next job is to fill a raised bed for some rather nice aubergine pants my wife has raised.

I strimmed the plot today with the association's petrol mower. It leaves your hands popping inside with the vibrations. It makes it look neater though.

I'm off work for the week after next, so hopefully I'll be able to catch up then.

[Paulclem]

I'm waiting to see you do that dance, Paul


What sort of weather is good for potatos; I thought you needed plenty of water.

That's a dance I can do - sitting in a row on the floor and swaying back and forth. The only problem in the old days was the spilt beer and broken glass on the dancefloor.

Not too wet I gather. The tubers might rot in the ground. It's been very warm and dry here this spring, but the taties are doing well.

[Paulclem]

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/kahawai1.jpg

All her own work, on a 6-lb test line, the fish weighing about 4 pounds. It's a kahawai by its local name, but internationally, it'd be called a sea trout, because they fight just like a trout, leaping out of the water and going on huge runs.


Nice photo.

[prendrelemick]

Can anyone explain the connection between volcanoes in Iceland and Doncaster Borough Council? Google ads seems to have found one.


These are puzzleing times.

[The Atheist]

Can anyone explain the connection between volcanoes in Iceland and Doncaster Borough Council? Google ads seems to have found one.

The Council spends so much money on Google Adsense that their ads appear on every UK browser when it gets to an Adsense site?

Bit like ads for seek.co.nz, NZ's employment site appearing on LitNet in my browser, even though nothing here is connected to job searches.

[Paulclem]

I've got an ad for fungal nails and Tatton garden show. One makes sense whilst the other...perhaps Google's psychic. Are you taking an unexpected trip to Doncaster Mick? It would be unexpected as no-one would plan to go there.

[prendrelemick]

Nope! nor Iceland. It's not an advert for anything though, just the words "Doncaster Borough Council" and a crest, nothing else.

The only thing I can think of, is that they are one of those authorities who put their (our) money in a high intrest account in a certain Icelandic bank, and lost it all. Google remembers all!

[Paulclem]

Nope! nor Iceland. It's not an advert for anything though, just the words "Doncaster Borough Council" and a crest, nothing else.

The only thing I can think of, is that they are one of those authorities who put their (our) money in a high intrest account in a certain Icelandic bank, and lost it all. Google remembers all!

Or perhaps they wanted to advertise, but had nothing to show off in it.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

The weather, for the start of winter, has been amazing. The few bad days we've had have been really bad, but most of the time, it's still more autumnal than winter.

Great to ask, because yesterday was a stunner, so we went to the beach, with this result:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/kahawai1.jpg

All her own work, on a 6-lb test line, the fish weighing about 4 pounds. It's a kahawai by its local name, but internationally, it'd be called a sea trout, because they fight just like a trout, leaping out of the water and going on huge runs.

Her arms were a bit tired at the end of it, but a superb catch, eaten for dinner in a kahawai and spinach quiche!



A lifetime memory. I would say the arm has healed quite well if she was able to bring that one in.

.

[prendrelemick]

I dreamt about Kate Middleton last night in what was probably a treasonable way. Mrs P says it's not my head that needs chopping off! These menages a trois are so difficult at times.

[The Atheist]

A lifetime memory. I would say the arm has healed quite well if she was able to bring that one in.

.

Yep, just like new!


I dreamt about Kate Middleton last night in what was probably a treasonable way. Mrs P says it's not my head that needs chopping off! These menages a trois are so difficult at times.

:smilielol5:

It's gone a little quiet around here - that bloody jocky, slopes back after months with the French Foreign legion, scares off our new members, then slopes back off again.

Parker's setting up rounds all round!

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

I dreamt about Kate Middleton last night in what was probably a treasonable way. Mrs P says it's not my head that needs chopping off! These menages a trois are so difficult at times.

A worthy dream. I just had a vino vision of Claudette Colbert. Gibbon's had it all wrong, I tell you it was Claudette that brought down the Empire! (see below)



It's gone a little quiet around here - that bloody jocky, slopes back after months with the French Foreign legion, scares off our new members, then slopes back off again.

Parker's setting up rounds all round!

"Your a butterfly with the sting of a wasp. Take off your clothes and get in here and tell me all about it"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pNNE_U8GOw


.

[prendrelemick]

Gilliat, I don't know how you find these clips. Ms. Colbert certainly had it in spades - before "it" had been invented.

Meanwhile, the imaginary afair with the Dutchess Of Cambridge is not going well. My dreams have returned to the usual- walking down the Highstreet without any trousers on- sort of thing.

[Paulclem]

I tell you it was Claudette that brought down the Empire! (see below)




"Your a butterfly with the sting of a wasp. Take off your clothes and get in here and tell me all about it"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pNNE_U8GOw


.

That clip had a lot of passing Yorkshiremen in it - you could hear them all passing going, "ey up, ey up". I always suspected that we had an integral part in the Empire and Hollywood.

[soundofmusic]

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/kahawai1.jpg

All her own work, on a 6-lb test line, the fish weighing about 4 pounds. It's a kahawai by its local name, but internationally, it'd be called a sea trout, because they fight just like a trout, leaping out of the water and going on huge runs.

Her arms were a bit tired at the end of it, but a superb catch, eaten for dinner in a kahawai and spinach quiche!

The playhouse has been taken down as we're going to move. Just waiting for the right house.


:lol:

Her skateboarding has a little way to go before she's doing jumps. Ollie is still an unattainable target at the moment.

She can half fish though! You shoulda seen her - reeling in, letting it run; just like an old pro. She got a bigger fish as well, and that's a very small set she's using. A+

Wow, she's incredible, and still looks like she's been locked away in a castle, with never a broken fingernail. :thumbsup:

Fantastic!

I think we should have Parker put Atheist under, I could use some of that DNA for a cloning experiment I have going.


Ivy cottage is being used by the old Guy next to me. He asked me if he could keep his tools there, and that's no problem. THE Shed is way big enough for our needs.

The fallout bunker is still there too. I'll take it down eventually, but I'm still digging patches for whatever's got to go in. I'm behind with the work, but we're getting there. The runner beans my wife has grown are big and healthy. The next job is to fill a raised bed for some rather nice aubergine pants my wife has raised.

I strimmed the plot today with the association's petrol mower. It leaves your hands popping inside with the vibrations. It makes it look neater though.

I'm off work for the week after next, so hopefully I'll be able to catch up then.

Fallout bunker, no kidding, when was it built? I don't know, maybe you should keep it, if WWIII doesn't happen, we can always hide away our retirement cash.


That's a dance I can do - sitting in a row on the floor and swaying back and forth. The only problem in the old days was the spilt beer and broken glass on the dancefloor.

Not too wet I gather. The tubers might rot in the ground. It's been very warm and dry here this spring, but the taties are doing well.

Ooh, I certainly wouldn't want to be pulling glass from my ar** and wondering how I got it the next morning.
I'm trying to decide what the best size for a baking potato is. I bought some wonderful ones from Costco, about half a foot, they barely had any flavor and were tough as the dickens...took about 3 hours to bake.


I dreamt about Kate Middleton last night in what was probably a treasonable way. Mrs P says it's not my head that needs chopping off! These menages a trois are so difficult at times.

Ah, the princess. I think you should tell Mrs P that you were dreaming about Kate and it was just terrible, she wasn't air brushed in the dream and all of her old acne scars and white heads were showing; so you looked down the isle and a beautiful creature came walking toward you and when you woke up...there she was.


A worthy dream. I just had a vino vision of Claudette Colbert. Gibbon's had it all wrong, I tell you it was Claudette that brought down the Empire! (see below)

"Your a butterfly with the sting of a wasp. Take off your clothes and get in here and tell me all about it"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pNNE_U8GOw


.

Okay, have to check this out again; that is a wonderful quote.




"Your a butterfly with the sting of a wasp. Take off your clothes and get in here and tell me all about it"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8pNNE_U8GOw


.

Take off your clothes and tell me all about it; meanwhile, we'll work on that stinger....hum, I wonder if we missed alittle girl action:banghead:

[DocHeart]

Take off your clothes and tell me all about it; meanwhile, we'll work on that stinger....hum, I wonder if we missed alittle girl action:banghead:

Girl action?!

Parker, another one of what the lady's having, when you get a chance.

[The Atheist]

I'll get him to double up all round - seems to be working quite well!

[soundofmusic]

Girl action?!

Parker, another one of what the lady's having, when you get a chance.


I'll get him to double up all round - seems to be working quite well!

Yeah, I think I'm going to need a double tonight gents and a little girl action would be a welcome relief. My daughter checked out Mel Gibsons "The Passion" tonight for our movie night...I didn't get past the part where they hang him over a cliff.....:cold::eek6::shocked::ack2:

So, if Claudette Colbert will lose some of that makeup when she goes down in that milk again, I think I could get into this stuff...:lol:

[DocHeart]

Crikey. I've just calculated I've smoked 209,875 cigarettes in my life.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...So, if Claudette Colbert will lose some of that makeup when she goes down in that milk again, I think I could get into this stuff...:lol:

Or you might consider becoming a "Baller Girl" :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLpS4Phe0Wc

btw - is anyone familiar with the tune in the video? I need to get my hands on that.



Crikey. I've just calculated I've smoked 209,875 cigarettes in my life.

Marlboro is looking for a new "man" !! Can you ride a horse?

------
Thought I'd share a pic of Gilliatt junior as he was helping clear off the stage following his HS Orchestra concert. photo quality's not the best, it was taken from the back of the auditorium w/ no flash:

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/Sonandviolin.jpg

[Paulclem]

Or you might consider becoming a "Baller Girl" :

btw - is anyone familiar with the tune in the video? I need to get my hands on that.


I'm completely bewildered by that video. I like the tune too, though I've never heard it before.

Keep the wierd vids coming Gilliatt.

Nice picture of your boy. It's a great thing to be able to make music.

By the way, the "Serious Discussions" thread is becoming a little serious. I see you chaps are keeping out of it. I had a little tinker, but it's a bit pointless I realise. I'd not dipped into the Mozart thread, and so I didn't know what to expect. I'll be joining you chaps in the members only bar later.

[soundofmusic]

Crikey. I've just calculated I've smoked 209,875 cigarettes in my life.

I'll bet you never catch colds, do you? My husband smoked 5 packs a day, never caught a cold. Viruses hate smoky breath, or maybe the lining along the throat is all callouses...


Or you might consider becoming a "Baller Girl" :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qLpS4Phe0Wc

btw - is anyone familiar with the tune in the video? I need to get my hands on that.


Marlboro is looking for a new "man" !! Can you ride a horse?

------
Thought I'd share a pic of Gilliatt junior as he was helping clear off the stage following his HS Orchestra concert. photo quality's not the best, it was taken from the back of the auditorium w/ no flash:

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/Sonandviolin.jpg


I think I like the little mermaid girls swimming around in the fish tanks in bars better.

Yes, young Gilliatt is quite adorable...talent too, take some of Gilliatts dna too Parker...




By the way, the "Serious Discussions" thread is becoming a little serious. I see you chaps are keeping out of it. I had a little tinker, but it's a bit pointless I realise. I'd not dipped into the Mozart thread, and so I didn't know what to expect. I'll be joining you chaps in the members only bar later.

You don't say...I have to get over there! Every time I've been they're discussing the same stuff they were 3 years ago. Speking of profound discussions, where is our Jocky....and why hasn't Mark come back to tell us a joke?

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150192333426549&set=pu.20532671548&type=1&theater Somebody said Jocky was spending the day at South Beach in Miami:lol:

[The Atheist]

Crikey. I've just calculated I've smoked 209,875 cigarettes in my life.

Enough to make a trail from New York to Beijing.

Less after they've been smoked.



Thought I'd share a pic of Gilliatt junior as he was helping clear off the stage following his HS Orchestra concert. photo quality's not the best, it was taken from the back of the auditorium w/ no flash:

Good grief - I'm guessing he takes after mom!

:D


I'll bet you never catch colds, do you? My husband smoked 5 packs a day, never caught a cold. Viruses hate smoky breath, or maybe the lining along the throat is all callouses...

He must've just been lucky, as any nurse on a non-surgical ward will tell you.



I think I like the little mermaid girls swimming around in the fish tanks in bars better.

There's just something about mermaids...


Somebody said Jocky was spending the day at South Beach in Miami:lol:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/funny.gif


By the way, the "Serious Discussions" thread is becoming a little serious.

Why do I get the impression that those threads pop up in droves around the time the loony-bin has a few day-release passes being handed out?

[DocHeart]

He must've just been lucky, as any nurse on a non-surgical ward will tell you.




I don't care what a nurse on a non-surgical ward will tell me. It won't matter to me. I'll find her sexy anyway. It's a fetish thing.

[The Atheist]

I don't care what a nurse on a non-surgical ward will tell me. It won't matter to me. I'll find her sexy anyway. It's a fetish thing.

:smilielol5:

I've never got into the uniform fetish, but I used to get into some nice nurses in my youth.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

By the way, the "Serious Discussions" thread is becoming a little serious. I see you chaps are keeping out of it. I had a little tinker, but it's a bit pointless I realise. I'd not dipped into the Mozart thread, and so I didn't know what to expect. I'll be joining you chaps in the members only bar later.

Every so often I'll drop a response on the porch light it on fire then run. When it comes to M****t (I can't even bring myself to say the name), I'm quite satisfied that I settled that issue two years ago back in Dumas at the "Dreary Beery"


...Yes, young Gilliatt is quite adorable...talent too, take some of Gilliatts dna too Parker...

You would want my parents, any positive aspects you are implying skip a generation.



... Somebody said Jocky was spending the day at South Beach in Miami:lol:

Mine require suspenders too, but at least I have the decency to wear a shirt and breeches!


...Good grief - I'm guessing he takes after mom!

Ha! yes thankfully he picked up her Belgian qualities rather than father's "Slobic" ones.

.

[The Atheist]

Ha! yes thankfully he picked up her Belgian qualities rather than father's "Slobic" ones.

.

How about that - we share ethnicity!

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

Are yanks welcome here? I've had many a fantasy about Kate Middleton, and her sister, if that helps. :nod:

http://fashiontrendsusa.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/Pippa-Middleton-Bikini-Pics-04-Kate-Pippa-Middleton-Bikini-2011.jpg

Nice.

[The Atheist]

Are yanks welcome here? I've had many a fantasy about Kate Middleton, and her sister, if that helps.

Indeed, they are a lovely pair.

We already have several members from the former colony of USA, if that's what you mean, so certainly, pull up a chair, tell Parker what you're drinking, and come on in!

[prendrelemick]

Are yanks welcome here? I've had many a fantasy about Kate Middleton, and her sister, if that helps. :nod:

http://fashiontrendsusa.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/Pippa-Middleton-Bikini-Pics-04-Kate-Pippa-Middleton-Bikini-2011.jpg

Nice.




So! That's where kate's gone. She left my fantasy about two weeks ago and I haven't seen her since.

( Ask her where she put the pot of yoghurt and the bycycle pump when you next see her.)

[The Atheist]

( Ask her where she put the pot of yoghurt and the bycycle pump when you next see her.)

:eek2:

I need a strong one after that!


By the way, the "Serious Discussions" thread is becoming a little serious.

That seems to have been taken care of! A few whacks with the big stick by Scher and it quietened down nicely.

I'll get Parker to set her up a..

Scher, what would you like? Something long and refreshing after that workout!

:D

____________________________________


I've had Parker lay in a few cases of Corgi Pale Ale in honour of Her Majesty's birthday observation in New Zealand.

To celebrate the occasion, I've put out a few anti-monarchists rants.

:cheers2:

[Paulclem]

That seems to have been taken care of! A few whacks with the big stick by Scher and it quietened down nicely.

I'll get Parker to set her up a..

Scher, what would you like? Something long and refreshing after that workout!

:D

____________________________________


I've had Parker lay in a few cases of Corgi Pale Ale in honour of Her Majesty's birthday observation in New Zealand.

To celebrate the occasion, I've put out a few anti-monarchists rants.

:cheers2:

Whoa - that is some stick.

I'd be wary of the Corgi "Pale Ale".

The monarchy's arms are empire length.

[prendrelemick]

That seems to have been taken care of! A few whacks with the big stick by Scher and it quietened down nicely.

I'll get Parker to set her up a..

Scher, what would you like? Something long and refreshing after that workout!

:D

____________________________________


I've had Parker lay in a few cases of Corgi Pale Ale in honour of Her Majesty's birthday observation in New Zealand.

To celebrate the occasion, I've put out a few anti-monarchists rants.

:cheers2:


She reminds me of a headmistress we used to have (Sher that is, not the Queen,) a few whacks across the back of the leg with two rulers would soon bring us into line.

I realize now she used two rulers held together for sound effect purposes, they made a very loud THWACK! instantly cowering any dissent from the watching 6 year olds.

[Paulclem]

She reminds me of a headmistress we used to have (Sher that is, not the Queen,) a few whacks across the back of the leg with two rulers would soon bring us into line.

I realize now she used two rulers held together for sound effect purposes, they made a very loud THWACK! instantly cowering any dissent from the watching 6 year olds.

We used to get THE STRAP which, thinking back, was like a belt with no buckle, and not particularly painful. i think it was the anticipation of THE STRAP that caused the pain.

We also used to get rules and slippers - or pumps across the backside. I've also been and seen kids get slapped - sometimes across the face. The Middle school i went to had the cane - which I never had the pleasure of.

Ahh the good old days...

All the same, it was nothing to what you got at home anyway. My parents would say that it never did them any harm. They were nuts though, so I'm not too sure.

[The Atheist]

She reminds me of a headmistress we used to have (Sher that is, not the Queen,) a few whacks across the back of the leg with two rulers would soon bring us into line.

That sounds a lot like wishful thinking!


I realize now she used two rulers held together for sound effect purposes, they made a very loud THWACK! instantly cowering any dissent from the watching 6 year olds.

I know what kept us in line - one day when I was about 8, the teacher beat the living crap out of my mate. She was in a fury, punctuating every second word she shouted at him with a very hard slap on the leg. After a couple of minutes, his leg was purple and he was crying hysterically.

We kept pretty quiet after that!


The Middle school i went to had the cane - which I never had the pleasure of.

Oh yeah, lots of that at my high. When I was in the sixth form I was mostly in love with my English teacher and I can vividly remember her going white one day when the deputy head was giving some kid six of the absolute best right outside the room. You could tell from the sounds that he really stepping into them hard.

Nasty business, that.

One of our teachers was a Maori All Black prop PE teacher. His classes were pretty well-behaved.


Ahh the good old days...

All the same, it was nothing to what you got at home anyway. My parents would say that it never did them any harm. They were nuts though, so I'm not too sure.

Well, it didn't always cause bad, but I do go along with laws that prohibit that kind of behaviour nowadays.

[Paulclem]

Well, it didn't always cause bad, but I do go along with laws that prohibit that kind of behaviour nowadays.

It's the thought that teachers would be able to do it to your kids. Most teachers are fine enouh, but some I wouldn't trust with the power.



One of our teachers was a Maori All Black prop PE teacher. His classes were pretty well-behaved.


:lol:

Yes, physical prescence is alays respected by boys. It was a factor - the unspoken elephant in the room - when I was teaching - not that I was a bully teacher or anything like that. It was just the awareness that you got respect for physical prescence.

[The Atheist]

It's the thought that teachers would be able to do it to your kids. Most teachers are fine enouh, but some I wouldn't trust with the power.

I am certain one of the teachers at my high used to cane on an inordinate number of third formers and have very strong suspicion that had a lot more to do with his sexual fantasies than behaviour, which is what put me off the idea of letting teachers do it.

As the youngest and youngest-looking boy at high when I started, I am eternally thankful I never got closer than 10m to him the entire time I was there.


:lol:

Yes, physical prescence is alays respected by boys. It was a factor - the unspoken elephant in the room - when I was teaching - not that I was a bully teacher or anything like that. It was just the awareness that you got respect for physical prescence.

Yeah, it's funny like that. Another teacher was also a 1st Class rugby player and I know for a fact he never touched a cane, let alone used one.

His classes, while often a bit noisy, were always well-behaved, but because he was a top bloke and we didn't want to piss him off. (I had him as a teacher all the way through. ;))

I notice one of my kid's school's teachers as having a really well-behaved class every year, and I'm sure it's because he is strict but without being a dick. That old R-E-S-P-E-C-T works.

[soundofmusic]

I don't care what a nurse on a non-surgical ward will tell me. It won't matter to me. I'll find her sexy anyway. It's a fetish thing.

I don't know, maybe I'm looking at it from gender bias; but nurses have all the sex appeal of an 80 year old nun to me; which reminds me, any of you guys into nuns:lol:


:smilielol5:

I've never got into the uniform fetish, but I used to get into some nice nurses in my youth.

Do you have any idea where there hands have been, if so, you would never let them touch you! That's why I go after all doctors except gynecologists.




You would want my parents, any positive aspects you are implying skip a generation.

Mine require suspenders too, but at least I have the decency to wear a shirt and breeches!

Ha! yes thankfully he picked up her Belgian qualities rather than father's "Slobic" ones.

.

Well, I hope he has his dads witty personality.
Thank you for sharing that; some of my endowments also require suspenders; but I've given up wearing them. :lol:


Are yanks welcome here? I've had many a fantasy about Kate Middleton, and her sister, if that helps. :nod:

http://fashiontrendsusa.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/05/Pippa-Middleton-Bikini-Pics-04-Kate-Pippa-Middleton-Bikini-2011.jpg

Nice.

Theres just something wrong about women who wear dangling earrings and a bikini.


So! That's where kate's gone. She left my fantasy about two weeks ago and I haven't seen her since.

( Ask her where she put the pot of yoghurt and the bycycle pump when you next see her.)

You're probably getting interference from the fetal monitor:idea:

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

....We also used to get rules and slippers - or pumps across the backside. I've also been and seen kids get slapped - sometimes across the face. The Middle school i went to had the cane - which I never had the pleasure of.

Ahh the good old days...


...I know what kept us in line - one day when I was about 8, the teacher beat the living crap out of my mate. She was in a fury,...

...One of our teachers was a Maori All Black prop PE teacher. His classes were pretty well-behaved...

I attended Catholic school for the first few years of grade school. I still have vivid memories of Sister Cecilia and her 12 inch Maple rule. She whacked your palms or wrists so hard, you could measure from the imprint left behind. My parents pulled me out and sent me to public school. I had the baseball coach for a history class in Junior High. He used a board, about the same proportions as a cricket bat. You don't want a baseball coach dolling out corporal "licks".


...some of my endowments also require suspenders; but I've given up wearing them....

Very funny !!

.

[DocHeart]

Only a few days after winning their sixth European Champion title in Barcelona, Spain, Panathinaikos of Athens clinched their 13th Greek Championship title in 14 years last night.

Panathinaikos went into the finals against Olympiakos Pireaus (also known as the scum of the earth) with a home-court disadvantage, but won the series 3-1 anyway - 'cause, you know. It's just the way it is. They have been the greatest club in Europe for so long that any aspiring challengers know they are just that, aspiring challengers.

The six-time European champions won the fourth game in the series 101 - 94 in front of their home crowd who once again packed the OAKA Arena to capacity, even though they lost their captain (and European player of the year) Dimitris Diamantidis a few seconds into the game due to injury. Youngster John Kalathis took over at point guard and dominated the key with 16 points and 5 assists. Antonis Fotsis hit 6/6 three-pointers in his 28-point rampage, and Mike Batist (pictured below) kept crashing the boards scooping up 11 offensive rebounds and 22 points.

For one night, we forgot our worries about the state our economy is in and had a chance to bring out the retsina and the bouzouki. Well, Panathinaikos fans did. Olympiakos fans didn't. Go on, ask me if I feel sorry for them...

http://4.bp.blogspot.com/_0YS0Ob3sKZw/TPZhGDdDJvI/AAAAAAAAAvw/Y20xUweN3jU/s1600/article_image1_41501.jpg

[The Atheist]

I don't know, maybe I'm looking at it from gender bias; but nurses have all the sex appeal of an 80 year old nun to me; which reminds me, any of you guys into nuns:lol:

No way! They become a hard habit to break, so I hear.



Do you have any idea where there hands have been, if so, you would never let them touch you! That's why I go after all doctors except gynecologists.

I'd be more concerned about the proctologist!



I attended Catholic school for the first few years of grade school. I still have vivid memories of Sister Cecilia and her 12 inch Maple rule. She whacked your palms or wrists so hard, you could measure from the imprint left behind. My parents pulled me out and sent me to public school. I had the baseball coach for a history class in Junior High. He used a board, about the same proportions as a cricket bat. You don't want a baseball coach dolling out corporal "licks".

Ow!

Nuns have a horrible history of child abuse while teaching. Luckily for them, the behaviour of the priests allowed the nuns to hide away quietly.


Only a few days after winning their sixth European Champion title in Barcelona, Spain, Panathinaikos of Athens clinched their 13th Greek Championship title in 14 years last night.

Congrats to you and your team!

I'm betting you're not too upset for the Olympiakos fans. Something about your post just gives me that impression:

Olympiakos Pireaus (also known as the scum of the earth)

:smilielol5:

Basketball's going ok here at the moment as well, with our team having just taken out the Australian Champs.

[soundofmusic]

I attended Catholic school for the first few years of grade school. I still have vivid memories of Sister Cecilia and her 12 inch Maple rule. She whacked your palms or wrists so hard, you could measure from the imprint left behind. My parents pulled me out and sent me to public school. I had the baseball coach for a history class in Junior High. He used a board, about the same proportions as a cricket bat. You don't want a baseball coach dolling out corporal "licks".

Very funny !!

.

I'm sure you wouldn't have minded your lashings if the nuns would have looked like Kate Middleton.
Thank you, it's good to be appreciated.


No way! They become a hard habit to break, so I hear.


I'd be more concerned about the proctologist!


Ow!

Nuns have a horrible history of child abuse while teaching. Luckily for them, the behaviour of the priests allowed the nuns to hide away quietly.


I don't know any women who go to proctologist...do we? hum, I don't know any proctologists that admit to being proctologists...:idea:

Really, well, I did meet a few gentlemen who found me irresistible in my white dresses, one later confided, though, that is was because my panty line showed through in the light.

Did we used to hear much about the sins of priests? I don't recall it until the 80s; though my mother being a protestant had all sorts of stories about Catholics.

So, is Kate with child or not, Star says yes, Buckingham says no.

[Paulclem]

I don't know any women who go to proctologist...do we? hum, I don't know any proctologists that admit to being proctologists...:idea:


Here in the UK the NHS calls us men up when we're 55 for a visit to the friendly local proctologist - not sure what they're called - well officially called - here.

A friend of mine used to describe the visits. He said the chap usually looked a large ruddy faced giant who was of a genetic lineage of bale hauling agriculturalists whose usual hobbies included wrestling bulls or bending iron bars with their huge strapping hams.

I don't know whether it just looked that way as he adopted the position...

Anyway - to the utter delight of our wives - the birthday party will be in full swing when the letter - like an uninvited bad fairy - will drop through the letter box with the euphemism - screening - typed in jagged black letters across the top. :lol:

[prendrelemick]

I shall be taking my own jar of vasaline.

[DocHeart]

Things a proctologist might say:


"Don't have a seat, I'll be right with you."

"Yes, I see a family resemblance."

"Out of K-Y Jelly? Oh well, let's do a dry run."

"I'm putting you on a low-bean diet."

"Nurse, give me a number 2 sandpaper glove."

"If you think that was a pain in the ***, wait till you get my bill."

"Nurse! Who let this ******* in my office?"

[The Atheist]

I don't know any women who go to proctologist...do we? hum, I don't know any proctologists that admit to being proctologists...:idea:

Yeah, women don't feature high on the rectal disease list. Where's your equal rights there, eh?


Here in the UK the NHS calls us men up when we're 55 for a visit to the friendly local proctologist - not sure what they're called - well officially called - here.

Do they have national prostate screening in UK?

There are signs of them wanting to do it here. Waste of time and money, and adverse medical results says it shouldn't happen, but some blokes get a bit of size envy at the girls' health budgets every so often...


A friend of mine used to describe the visits. He said the chap usually looked a large ruddy faced giant who was of a genetic lineage of bale hauling agriculturalists whose usual hobbies included wrestling bulls or bending iron bars with their huge strapping hams.

I don't know whether it just looked that way as he adopted the position...

I think you'll find he means the hand size.

I always tell mates that if you're having anything done in that region, find a Chinese female doctor. ;) (I once had a Dutch bargee. :eek2:)


Things a proctologist might say:


"Don't have a seat, I'll be right with you."

"Yes, I see a family resemblance."

"Out of K-Y Jelly? Oh well, let's do a dry run."

"I'm putting you on a low-bean diet."

"Nurse, give me a number 2 sandpaper glove."

"If you think that was a pain in the ***, wait till you get my bill."

"Nurse! Who let this ******* in my office?"

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/funny.gif

[Paulclem]

Yes I think they do prostate screening too. Either that or they're thinking about it.

[soundofmusic]

Here in the UK the NHS calls us men up when we're 55 for a visit to the friendly local proctologist - not sure what they're called - well officially called - here.

A friend of mine used to describe the visits. He said the chap usually looked a large ruddy faced giant who was of a genetic lineage of bale hauling agriculturalists whose usual hobbies included wrestling bulls or bending iron bars with their huge strapping hams.

I don't know whether it just looked that way as he adopted the position...

Anyway - to the utter delight of our wives - the birthday party will be in full swing when the letter - like an uninvited bad fairy - will drop through the letter box with the euphemism - screening - typed in jagged black letters across the top. :lol:

Isn't it strange how fellows with wide, heavy hands always go into jobs like glass blowing, proctology and gynecology. I had a doctor with huge hands who thought I had some sort of post traumatic stess because he said I bit him when his hands were in my mouth; the doctor was so huge that my teeth grazed his hands and his private parts always grazed the patients leg when he was doing an examination. :lol:


I shall be taking my own jar of vasaline.


Things a proctologist might say:


"Don't have a seat, I'll be right with you."

"Yes, I see a family resemblance."

"Out of K-Y Jelly? Oh well, let's do a dry run."

"I'm putting you on a low-bean diet."

"Nurse, give me a number 2 sandpaper glove."

"If you think that was a pain in the ***, wait till you get my bill."

"Nurse! Who let this ******* in my office?"

Aren't their any female proctologists...of course, ones who don't wear glue on nails.


Yeah, women don't feature high on the rectal disease list. Where's your equal rights there, eh?



Do they have national prostate screening in UK?

There are signs of them wanting to do it here. Waste of time and money, and adverse medical results says it shouldn't happen, but some blokes get a bit of size envy at the girls' health budgets every so often...



I think you'll find he means the hand size.

I always tell mates that if you're having anything done in that region, find a Chinese female doctor. ;) (I once had a Dutch bargee. :eek2:)



http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/funny.gif

I've avoided colonoscopies even though I'm a few years past 50. I had never met a woman with colon cancer except ladies of the night; but recently I talked with my ex's sister and she got colon cancer in her early 30's.


That reminds me Atheist, do any of you fellows remember when "trolling" met prostituting? Apparently, it means something else now

[The Atheist]

Yes I think they do prostate screening too. Either that or they're thinking about it.

Against the sound findings of the BMJ, no less.


That reminds me Atheist, do any of you fellows remember when "trolling" met prostituting? Apparently, it means something else now

Yes!

Although I've always used it in fishing rather than that kind of hooking. I guess you could troll for hookers on the internet!

[The Atheist]

Looks like winter might be finally starting here and we haven't been back to our beach yet.

Lizzie's birthday was taken up with more civilised pursuits:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/mtsinaionline.jpg

(the winner of the Open Hurdle at Ellerslie racecourse on Monday)

[prendrelemick]

Ah a day at the races, that photo could have been taken this spring at Haydock - doesn't New Zealand do Autumn?

The daughter went to York races last month. She put £5 on a horse and it won, so she put £10 on a horse in the next, that won too. She went to put £20 on one in the next, but couldn't get to her lucky bookie in time, and the horse won. She had chosen horses she liked the look of, nothing to do with form.

Her boyfriend then got her to put all his remaining stake money on a horse she fancied in the next, and he lost it all.

That lady luck, fickle as ever.

[Paulclem]

Ah a day at the races, that photo could have been taken this spring at Haydock - doesn't New Zealand do Autumn?

The daughter went to York races last month. She put £5 on a horse and it won, so she put £10 on a horse in the next, that won too. She went to put £20 on one in the next, but couldn't get to her lucky bookie in time, and the horse won. She had chosen horses she liked the look of, nothing to do with form.

Her boyfriend then got her to put all his remaining stake money on a horse she fancied in the next, and he lost it all.

That lady luck, fickle as ever.

I once played a rugby game in the middle of York racecourse. It was a saturda morning, but no races were going on at the time.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Isn't it strange how fellows with wide, heavy hands always go into jobs like glass blowing, proctology and gynecology...

...Aren't their any female proctologists...of course, ones who don't wear glue on nails.

....That reminds me Atheist, do any of you fellows remember when "trolling" met prostituting? Apparently, it means something else now

I received the white glove treatment a couple of years ago.
My Dr. is from India, she has big hands.


Looks like winter might be finally starting here and we haven't been back to our beach yet.

Lizzie's birthday was taken up with more civilised pursuits:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/mtsinaionline.jpg

(the winner of the Open Hurdle at Ellerslie racecourse on Monday)


Hold your Jackalopes!!...is Lizzie one of yours?
Great job and/or happy birthday.


--------
Entirely random; a fresh layer of chemtrail dust just settled on my property last night and it got me to thinking about other wordly phenomenon. I found this postcard I picked up the last time I passed through Roswell New Mexico:

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/DebrisField.jpg

The caption on the back reads:
"Major Jesse Marcel inspects material as "Mac" Brazel discusses finding the debris field on the ranch near Corona, New Mexico, July 7, 1947"

Looks like we have an anniversary coming up!


.

[The Atheist]

The caption on the back reads:
"Major Jesse Marcel inspects material as "Mac" Brazel discusses finding the debris field on the ranch near Corona, New Mexico, July 7, 1947"

Looks like we have an anniversary coming up!

God, if only that had happened in the days when people had cameras with films in them and not just aeroplanes, TV, radio, computers, atomic bombs, Lucky Strike cigarettes and Willy's Jeeps. What a pic that would have made!

Anyway, it's now all clear on Roswell, had you not caught up with that?

It wasn't aliens, but Russian mutant midget dwarfs, courtesy of the Angel of Death himself, direct from Auschwitz, Herr Doktor Mengele. (http://www.stuff.co.nz/entertainment/books/5058688/Roswell-UFO-piloted-by-Russian-mutant-midgets)

And I know that's true, because it was written by an investigative journalist and it was in a real newspaper!

[/frantically searches for nose-thumbing emoticon....]

[soundofmusic]

Looks like winter might be finally starting here and we haven't been back to our beach yet.

Lizzie's birthday was taken up with more civilised pursuits:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/mtsinaionline.jpg

(the winner of the Open Hurdle at Ellerslie racecourse on Monday)

Isn't the horse supposed to jump the hurdle?


Ah a day at the races, that photo could have been taken this spring at Haydock - doesn't New Zealand do Autumn?

The daughter went to York races last month. She put £5 on a horse and it won, so she put £10 on a horse in the next, that won too. She went to put £20 on one in the next, but couldn't get to her lucky bookie in time, and the horse won. She had chosen horses she liked the look of, nothing to do with form.

Her boyfriend then got her to put all his remaining stake money on a horse she fancied in the next, and he lost it all.

That lady luck, fickle as ever.

Haha :cool:

I received the white glove treatment a couple of years ago.
My Dr. is from India, she has big hands.




Hold your Jackalopes!!...is Lizzie one of yours?
Great job and/or happy birthday.


--------
Entirely random; a fresh layer of chemtrail dust just settled on my property last night and it got me to thinking about other wordly phenomenon. I found this postcard I picked up the last time I passed through Roswell New Mexico:

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/DebrisField.jpg

The caption on the back reads:
"Major Jesse Marcel inspects material as "Mac" Brazel discusses finding the debris field on the ranch near Corona, New Mexico, July 7, 1947"

Looks like we have an anniversary coming up!


.

Is the doctor big everywhere else? My gosh, how far did you have to go to find a big indian woman? You know, I never quite trust people that tell me to drop my pants and look the other way...are you sure it was a doctor...

And talking of getting taken...how about those air ballons....:lol:

[jocky]

http://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=10150192333426549&set=pu.20532671548&type=1&theater Somebody said Jocky was spending the day at South Beach in Miami:lol:

That is my brother Hamish he works full time as a male stripper, apparently the Women's Institute were most impressed by his last performance. Just between us he has a few shortcomings if you get my drift. :yesnod:

[jocky]

I note with great interest that surgical procedures seem to be the hot topic of the day. It was on this very subject that Mrs Jocky and I came very close to divorce. Those of you with a squeamish disposition should look away now. It all started five minutes after young Jocky was born, I was sitting with my tea and toast watching the medical team repairing the carnage when I asked the midwife if there was any chance of them inserting a few extra stitches. Well for some reason beyond my limited comprehension Mrs J leapt out of the bed and tried to strangle me, encouraged by several members of the female maternity staff. After all I had been through you would have thought a little sympathy and compassion would have been forthcoming. :)

[stlukesguild]

School is out for the summer and I finally go around to ordaining the grill for the first time with some marvelous brats and the thickest New York Strip cut steaks. Young's Double Chocolate goes to wonderfully with this. I've got 4 pints sitting ready in the 'fridge with an Ommegang ale to wrap things up. I've got the evening's listening also lined up: Thelonius Monk, The Louvin Brothers, Johnny Cash, the Rolling Stones, and Bob Dylan. Should be a wonderful evening... although whether I'm able to get up and get into the studio tomorrow morning is another story.

Right now listening to:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1HISecnfIFU

[jocky]

School is out for the summer and I finally go around to ordaining the grill for the first time with some marvelous brats and the thickest New York Strip cut steaks. Young's Double Chocolate goes to wonderfully with this. I've got 4 pints sitting ready in the 'fridge with an Ommegang ale to wrap things up. I've got the evening's listening also lined up: Thelonius Monk, The Louvin Brothers, Johnny Cash, the Rolling Stones, and Bob Dylan. Should be a wonderful evening... although whether I'm able to get up and get into the studio tomorrow morning is another story.

Right now listening to:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1HISecnfIFU

Enjoyed the Monk piece, shades of Acker Bilk or perhaps the other way round, your taste in music is first class. I got your subliminal message and take on board your observations. Perhaps we should just learn to live with each other. Have a good vacation as you thoroughly deserve it.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

School is out for the summer and I finally go around to ordaining the grill for the first time with some marvelous brats and the thickest New York Strip cut steaks. Young's Double Chocolate goes to wonderfully with this. I've got 4 pints sitting ready in the 'fridge with an Ommegang ale to wrap things up. I've got the evening's listening also lined up: Thelonius Monk, The Louvin Brothers, Johnny Cash, the Rolling Stones, and Bob Dylan. Should be a wonderful evening... although whether I'm able to get up and get into the studio tomorrow morning is another story.

Right now listening to:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1HISecnfIFU


Enjoyed the Monk piece, shades of Acker Bilk or perhaps the other way round, your taste in music is first class. I got your subliminal message and take on board your observations. Perhaps we should just learn to live with each other. Have a good vacation as you thoroughly deserve it.

Two of the Blokes finest return for some home brew :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sVvKbNb3-VY&feature=related

St. Lukes, sounds like you have a great evening lined up. Congratulations on your freedom.
“ordaining” the grill? Either you’ve already been tipping the bottle and missing keys, or…come to think of it, that makes perfect sense; “ordaining the grill”.

You can take care of Dylan and Cash in one shot:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PEVK66jsEM


.

[jocky]

Gilliatt, it is fairly obvious that Stukes has been draining the bottle, sorry I mean the drain, no I meant derailing the girl. Well you know what I mean. Cue Atheist.

[stlukesguild]

Actually the beer hasn't done it's work yet. I haven't even needed to rely on spell check so far. So let's break out this stuff:

http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5231/5834783054_ee0b0407f8.jpg

8.5% alcohol... that ought to get things warmed up.

Current listening:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kizPITXG9Ag

:smash:

[stlukesguild]

Perhaps I should move on to Hank Williams next... but then it almost seems blasphemy to be drinking Belgian ale to Hank. Nothing but some good Kentucky whiskey or bourbon for Hank! :smilewinkgrin::smash:

[The Atheist]

Mate! Great to see you back again.

Broken the shackles for another week?


... I asked the midwife if there was any chance of them inserting a few extra stitches...

Yes, women make such a fuss during childbirth. I've been present at all four and it didn't look all that difficult!

The Real Blokes' [TM] trick to talking about episiotomy stitches is actually to tell the surgeon to leave a couple out.

;)

[jocky]

Since we are all in a joyous mood of alcohol induced stupefaction how about this for a half decent song.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QE8YLPHZImw

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Perhaps I should move on to Hank Williams next... but then it almost seems blasphemy to be drinking Belgian ale to Hank. Nothing but some good Kentucky whiskey or bourbon for Hank! :smilewinkgrin::smash:

Funny you should mention Kentucky, I'm working on some Maker's Mark as we type.


...Mrs J leapt out of the bed and tried to strangle me,

By the way Jocky, where the hell do you go on these extended sabbaticals?
Rumor has it, you've been held up in Paul's Ivy League cottage tormenting the residents of his allotment.


.

[stlukesguild]

Joyous drinking songs? I prefer the dark stuff. Of course I can't help it. I'm listening to Johnny Cash right now... and wouldn't you know he'd sing the same song that was on the Louvin Brothers disc:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rct5EEt1VfA

Of course Johnny hits you like an Old Testament prophet...

hell, he even looked one...

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2723/5834875056_b0f1b9aaac_b.jpg

That's a face that Michelangelo would have loved. I can just imagine it on a sculpture of Isaiah or Abraham. :D

although this might be my favorite photo of Johnny:

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3080/5834323273_1ebb2abeae_z.jpg

Expressing his thoughts, perhaps, on commercial Nashville "country" music.

:smash:

[jocky]

By the way Jocky, where the hell do you go on these extended sabbaticals?
Rumor has it, you've been held up in Paul's Ivy League cottage tormenting the residents of his allotment.


.

I have been worrying myself sick over Atheist's assertion that the Gulf stream is going to shift and Scotland will revert to an ice-age glacier. Then I got to thinking about the upside, as there always is, and the horror of our southern neighbours dealing with a mass invasion of six million Jocks. Farms and allotments in England look a very inviting prospect for us homeless supplicants. Mick and Paul had better pray that the weather forecast changes as mutton and aubergines will go down very nicely. In fact some of my fellow compatriots are planning to invade Halifax, nothing to do with survival you understand, for the specific pleasure of stringing up Brian Moore.

[jocky]

Joyous drinking songs? I prefer the dark stuff. Of course I can't help it. I'm listening to Johnny Cash right now... and wouldn't you know he'd sing the same song that was on the Louvin Brothers disc:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rct5EEt1VfA

Of course Johnny hits you like an Old Testament prophet...

hell, he even looked one...

http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2723/5834875056_b0f1b9aaac_b.jpg

That's a face that Michelangelo would have loved. I can just imagine it on a sculpture of Isaiah or Abraham. :D

although this might be my favorite photo of Johnny:

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3080/5834323273_1ebb2abeae_z.jpg

Expressing his thoughts, perhaps, on commercial Nashville "country" music.

:smash:

Right enough Johnny has always been what we term in Scotland ' A looker ' :)

[stlukesguild]

You can take care of Dylan and Cash in one shot:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PEVK66jsEM

Great... but the Dylan I have lined up is the ultimate Dylan classic:

http://farm6.static.flickr.com/5153/5834408627_f07f0d3e30.jpg

As for Johnny Cash duets... you can't beat this one:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l3YFmpSFJ40

Johnny virtually condenses Cormac McCarthy's bleak view of America into a few brilliant lines:

I went out searching
looking for one good man
a spirit who would not bend or break
who would sit at his father's right hand.
I went out walking
with a Bible and a gun (!!!!)
the word of God lay heavy on my heart
I was sure I was the one...

Scarily, this is the core American culture for many:

I went out walking
with a Bible and a gun

[stlukesguild]

Right enough Johnny has always been what we term in Scotland ' A looker

Ummm.... I'm not certain that translates into American English all that well. A "looker" here is usually someone about whom you might have fantasies involving getting naked. I'm just not sure Johnny fits that bill...

:shocked::yikes:

Of course you might just have intended irony (something we don't get in the States... especially after a couple pints of beer).

But we do know how to smash things:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0HuToOuc9cA

:smash::smash::smash::crazy:

By the way... I'm currently taking a break with some Australian piss-water. I found an oil can of Fosters in the back of the 'fridge and thought it best to finish that before returning to the Young's Chocolate stout.

[stlukesguild]

Closing in on mid-night... time for:

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3231/5834567637_88f84b672b.jpg

:smash::smash::smash::smash:

[The Atheist]

I have been worrying myself sick over Atheist's assertion that the Gulf stream is going to shift and Scotland will revert to an ice-age glacier. Then I got to thinking about the upside, as there always is, and the horror of our southern neighbours dealing with a mass invasion of six million Jocks. Farms and allotments in England look a very inviting prospect for us homeless supplicants. Mick and Paul had better pray that the weather forecast changes as mutton and aubergines will go down very nicely. In fact some of my fellow compatriots are planning to invade Halifax, nothing to do with survival you understand, for the specific pleasure of stringing up Brian Moore.

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/funny.gif

The timing of that post as I read Tom Sharpe's The Throwback is almost too much!

[Paulclem]

There'll always be a place in the shed for you Jocky. no need to invade. You'll even have a choice of fallout Bunker and Ivy cottage, though you'll have to vacate Ivy cottage on a Wed afternoon as that's when old Fred goes in for a sit down.

I know what you mean about Johnny being a looker. His nose is pretty straight compared to us Northern types.

[prendrelemick]

I have been worrying myself sick over Atheist's assertion that the Gulf stream is going to shift and Scotland will revert to an ice-age glacier. Then I got to thinking about the upside, as there always is, and the horror of our southern neighbours dealing with a mass invasion of six million Jocks. Farms and allotments in England look a very inviting prospect for us homeless supplicants. Mick and Paul had better pray that the weather forecast changes as mutton and aubergines will go down very nicely. In fact some of my fellow compatriots are planning to invade Halifax, nothing to do with survival you understand, for the specific pleasure of stringing up Brian Moore.


In that case I have a barn with a beam, and I'm sure there will be a bit of old rope lying around somewhere...

[jocky]

There'll always be a place in the shed for you Jocky. no need to invade.

That is a most generous offer Paul. According to the latest intelligence reports I have already visited your shed. Strange thing is I have no recollection of being there, I must have been on a bender. :)

[jocky]

In that case I have a barn with a beam, and I'm sure there will be a bit of old rope lying around somewhere...

SO old potato head Moore is not loved in his own country either, what a surprise !

[Paulclem]

That is a most generous offer Paul. According to the latest intelligence reports I have already visited your shed. Strange thing is I have no recollection of being there, I must have been on a bender. :)

Did you find the plastic bottle with my stash of spiced rum?

[soundofmusic]

That is my brother Hamish he works full time as a male stripper, apparently the Women's Institute were most impressed by his last performance. Just between us he has a few shortcomings if you get my drift. :yesnod:

Ah, poor Hamish, with such shortcomings I think the Womens institute has the wrong brother dancing:wink5:


I note with great interest that surgical procedures seem to be the hot topic of the day. It was on this very subject that Mrs Jocky and I came very close to divorce. Those of you with a squeamish disposition should look away now. It all started five minutes after young Jocky was born, I was sitting with my tea and toast watching the medical team repairing the carnage when I asked the midwife if there was any chance of them inserting a few extra stitches. Well for some reason beyond my limited comprehension Mrs J leapt out of the bed and tried to strangle me, encouraged by several members of the female maternity staff. After all I had been through you would have thought a little sympathy and compassion would have been forthcoming. :)

I would have thought she would have thanked you:angelsad2:; though I'm not sure that making something smaller really helps. Reminds me of a friend of mine who was walking like a duck for a week in horrible pain, I asked him what was wrong and he confided that while his lady was away, he attended a party where the drinking prize was a coffee mug in the shape of a ladies....
which doubled as a.....Well, apparently my friend didn't realize that it was a joke mug, not meant for use and tried it on for size...:blush2:


School is out for the summer and I finally go around to ordaining the grill for the first time with some marvelous brats and the thickest New York Strip cut steaks. Young's Double Chocolate goes to wonderfully with this. I've got 4 pints sitting ready in the 'fridge with an Ommegang ale to wrap things up. I've got the evening's listening also lined up: Thelonius Monk, The Louvin Brothers, Johnny Cash, the Rolling Stones, and Bob Dylan. Should be a wonderful evening... although whether I'm able to get up and get into the studio tomorrow morning is another story.

Right now listening to:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1HISecnfIFU

Steaks and Chocolate, what woman could resist this party...after a few drinks I might even dance to a boy named Sue.


Two of the Blokes finest return for some home brew :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sVvKbNb3-VY&feature=related

St. Lukes, sounds like you have a great evening lined up. Congratulations on your freedom.
“ordaining” the grill? Either you’ve already been tipping the bottle and missing keys, or…come to think of it, that makes perfect sense; “ordaining the grill”.

You can take care of Dylan and Cash in one shot:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5PEVK66jsEM


.

That's not a pretty sight, Dylan and Cash together...let me take another drink.

[soundofmusic]

Mate! Great to see you back again.

Broken the shackles for another week?



Yes, women make such a fuss during childbirth. I've been present at all four and it didn't look all that difficult!

The Real Blokes' [TM] trick to talking about episiotomy stitches is actually to tell the surgeon to leave a couple out.

;)

God, I can still feel a twinge where they had those stitches...
I think if I were a man, though, I would wimp out when it came to standing next to the delivery table or I'd take a few hits of something first:puke:


Did you find the plastic bottle with my stash of spiced rum?

Did we ever decide if you can put liquor in a plastic bottle?

[Paulclem]

I've never had a problem, but then my taste buds are not very discerning.

When I was a poor pre-student i used to put a little something into a handy catheter bag - you know the ones with the little tap. Great for top ups.

You will tell me if I start repeating myself won't you? That's twice now tonight I've had the feeling I'm repeating myself. I don't want to be one of those old guys who regales you with the same stories every time he sees you.

Occaisionally I have to stop myself from telling the kids the same things - now they just pull that stretchy lip teen face. I do that one well too.

[jocky]

Did you find the plastic bottle with my stash of spiced rum?

No, but I seem to remember seeing a poster of Leopold Von Ranke, a stash of Playboy Magazines from the 1980's , a copy of Samuel Smile's ' Self Help ' and a pamphlet on the ' The Glory Of Allotments '. Either that or I may have been in my own shed. :lol:

[jocky]

Ah, poor Hamish







Soundo, how long have you been on the Cold Ale Thread ? You would think by now you could get it right ! It is ' Alas, poor Hamish ' This is getting tiresome having to correct everyones use of the Engerlish language. On that note I am going to my berd.

[The Atheist]

God, I can still feel a twinge where they had those stitches...

I think of the three episiotomies I've watched every time I'm slicing fillet steak.

:D

[Paulclem]

No, but I seem to remember seeing a poster of Leopold Von Ranke, a stash of Playboy Magazines from the 1980's , a copy of Samuel Smile's ' Self Help ' and a pamphlet on the ' The Glory Of Allotments '. Either that or I may have been in my own shed. :lol:

:lol:

Under the netting in the corner? No definately not my shed. I shall be down there tomorrow morning confirming that too.

[jocky]

I wonder what Vasari and Ruskin would have made of this,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QRJxafiqHvw

[prendrelemick]

Ruskin would understand.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

I wonder what Vasari and Ruskin would have made of this,

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QRJxafiqHvw


Ruskin would understand.

The reemergence of the Hudson River School.

--------------------

Heading home this past Friday, I cranked the wheel toward my usual haunt to pick up some spirits. The initial goal was to treat myself to a bottle of fine Belgian Ale to celebrate Father's Day, but as I pulled up in front of the spirit house, I noticed the reflection of my truck in the storefront glazing. Suddenly, I was drawn back to my youth visiting my maternal Grandmother down in Houston. She, being of solid Moravian stock, had a natural proclivity to Drambuie. I recall the empty bottles under her bed and the sweet Drambuie aroma blending with that time honored smell typically associated with Grandmother’s and their Depression era homes.

It is father’s day and as it turns out mine claimed he had some traces of Scotch in his veins; a claim backed up on Audio Fidelity vinyl in the form of the “9th Regiment Bagpipe Band”.

So, it all makes sense now…buying that Drambuie.

A wood (pre cardboard) Drambuie crate from my Grandmother’s house, my father’s LP and my bottle of Drambuie:


http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/IMGP1834.jpg

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/IMGP1839.jpg

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/IMGP1840.jpg



For the Bloke dad’s…Happy Father’s Day
(For Sundoff…a belated Happy Mother’s day)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33iJpxf-eDE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amKyA2PrSu4



.

[Paulclem]

The reemergence of the Hudson River School.

--------------------

Heading home this past Friday, I cranked the wheel toward my usual haunt to pick up some spirits. The initial goal was to treat myself to a bottle of fine Belgian Ale to celebrate Father's Day, but as I pulled up in front of the spirit house, I noticed the reflection of my truck in the storefront glazing. Suddenly, I was drawn back to my youth visiting my maternal Grandmother down in Houston. She, being of solid Moravian stock, had a natural proclivity to Drambuie. I recall the empty bottles under her bed and the sweet Drambuie aroma blending with that time honored smell typically associated with Grandmother’s and their Depression era homes.

It is father’s day and as it turns out mine claimed he had some traces of Scotch in his veins; a claim backed up on Audio Fidelity vinyl in the form of the “9th Regiment Bagpipe Band”.

So, it all makes sense now…buying that Drambuie.

A wood (pre cardboard) Drambuie crate from my Grandmother’s house, my father’s LP and my bottle of Drambuie:


http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/IMGP1834.jpg

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/IMGP1839.jpg

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/IMGP1840.jpg



For the Bloke dad’s…Happy Father’s Day
(For Sundoff…a belated Happy Mother’s day)


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=33iJpxf-eDE&feature=related

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=amKyA2PrSu4



.

What a fine picture with a fine provenance that is Gilliat. It's a picture and story that should go on the Blokes Club Wall at the back of the bar.

Happy Fathers day too.

This morning I was given a copy of Boccaccio's Decameron and Rob Roy by Walter Scott. What fine children to get me what I asked for.

I had a nip of whiskey in the coffee down at the allotment, and I bought a couple of bottles of pear cider to try. very nice.

Note to Jocky:

I've put a few bottles of "home brew" in the shed, though the brewery is our wormery. I've named it "Codger's Old Fart" due to it's singular bouquet.

I wouldn't recommend it as it may induce spontaneous vomiting, and if it doesn't, then it may well be a trip down to casualty for the old stomach pumping.

Just thought I'd mention it before you decided to have a swig of the black stuff.

[jocky]

Heading home this past Friday, I cranked the wheel toward my usual haunt to pick up some spirits. The initial goal was to treat myself to a bottle of fine Belgian Ale to celebrate Father's Day, but as I pulled up in front of the spirit house, I noticed the reflection of my truck in the storefront glazing. Suddenly, I was drawn back to my youth visiting my maternal Grandmother down in Houston. She, being of solid Moravian stock, had a natural proclivity to Drambuie. I recall the empty bottles under her bed and the sweet Drambuie aroma blending with that time honored smell typically associated with Grandmother’s and their Depression era homes.

It is father’s day and as it turns out mine claimed he had some traces of Scotch in his veins; a claim backed up on Audio Fidelity vinyl in the form of the “9th Regiment Bagpipe Band”.

So, it all makes sense now…buying that Drambuie.

A wood (pre cardboard) Drambuie crate from my Grandmother’s house, my father’s LP and my bottle of Drambuie:


http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/IMGP1834.jpg

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/IMGP1839.jpg

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Misc%20Album/IMGP1840.jpg







.

Ah, the Drambuie made famous by Prince Charles Edward Louis Casimir Sylvester Maria Stewart. Unfortunately for him it finally done for him in a tenement in Rome where he died a drunk and wife-beater. There used to be a drinking game in Scotland where after much imbibing of Drambuie the guests were invited to raise a toast to the said Prince, reciting his full name.
Needless to say the results were always a hoot.

I recall once being awakened early in the morning by the Pipes and Drums playing Amazing Grace. I thought to myself that is the best I have heard our Regimental P&D playing. I opened the cutains only to find that it was the Irish Rangers. It pains me to say it but they put our lot to shame.




Note to Jocky:

I've put a few bottles of "home brew" in the shed, though the brewery is our wormery. I've named it "Codger's Old Fart" due to it's singular bouquet.

I wouldn't recommend it as it may induce spontaneous vomiting, and if it doesn't, then it may well be a trip down to casualty for the old stomach pumping.

Just thought I'd mention it before you decided to have a swig of the black stuff.

It is a good job I tried it out on Turncoat first, you will be receiving the hefty vets bill very shortly. Still I found your Spicy Rum and very tasty it was too.

[prendrelemick]

I once tried to distill some bitter dandilion wine my father had laid down in the 60's. Out of one whole demijohn of wine I got a small ketchup bottle of clear liquid. After sampling it we decided it would be best kept with the other cleaning products under the sink.

[Paulclem]

I once tried to distill some bitter dandilion wine my father had laid down in the 60's. Out of one whole demijohn of wine I got a small ketchup bottle of clear liquid. After sampling it we decided it would be best kept with the other cleaning products under the sink.

I once made some elderflower wine. unfortunately I neglected to remove the stalks from the flowers. So the wine smelled and tasted of the green stalks.

it was strong though, and I managed to get it down with dashes of lemonade. Times were hard.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Ah, the Drambuie made famous by Prince Charles Edward Louis Casimir Sylvester Maria Stewart...
...the guests were invited to raise a toast to the said Prince, reciting his full name...


So Jocky, do you have any suggestions on how I should drink this stuff? I've had it straight in a shot glass, mixed with a little Dr. Pepper.

The label mentions a "Rusty Nail". Sure I could look it up, but I would rather learn of it from a veteran whose been hammered a few times.


I once tried to distill some bitter dandilion wine my father had laid down in the 60's. Out of one whole demijohn of wine I got a small ketchup bottle of clear liquid. After sampling it we decided it would be best kept with the other cleaning products under the sink.

Haha. You know that might make a good accelerant for getting the charcoal briquettes fired up. Heck, it could serve double duty as a marinade!


I once made some elderflower wine...
..Times were hard.

Haha
Speaking of hard times, legend has it that the Drambuie Grandmother made beer in her bathtub during Prohibition.

Paul I just realized...have you considered turning those potatoes into vodka?

.

[soundofmusic]

I've never had a problem, but then my taste buds are not very discerning.

When I was a poor pre-student i used to put a little something into a handy catheter bag - you know the ones with the little tap. Great for top ups.

You will tell me if I start repeating myself won't you? That's twice now tonight I've had the feeling I'm repeating myself. I don't want to be one of those old guys who regales you with the same stories every time he sees you.

Occaisionally I have to stop myself from telling the kids the same things - now they just pull that stretchy lip teen face. I do that one well too.

No, I'm sure you haven't told that one...I'd remember...that is alittle scary. :smilielol5:


Soundo, how long have you been on the Cold Ale Thread ? You would think by now you could get it right ! It is ' Alas, poor Hamish ' This is getting tiresome having to correct everyones use of the Engerlish language. On that note I am going to my berd.

I might have had it right by now Jocky; but I really need constant reinforcement an you keep going off for your hiatuses in Pauls shed.


I think of the three episiotomies I've watched every time I'm slicing fillet steak.

:D

Don't tell me they have you do the cut too...ewww; I'm never reincarnating as a man; though, the idea of the endowments do fascinate me...if only I could come back as one who has lots of hair on his head and none on his ar**...:smilielol5:

[jocky]

So Jocky, do you have any suggestions on how I should drink this stuff? I've had it straight in a shot glass, mixed with a little Dr. Pepper.

The label mentions a "Rusty Nail". Sure I could look it up, but I would rather learn of it from a veteran whose been hammered a few times.





.

In my experience those who ask the right questions usually think they know all the answers. You are so far ahead of yourself you should be careful you don't bump into yourself on the way back, this usually results in an unneccessary headache. I only tasted the stuff once and it was disgusting.






I might have had it right by now Jocky; but I really need constant reinforcement an you keep going off for your hiatuses in Pauls shed.





Yes, it is clearly an unfortunate repercussion of the herd mentality, I will do my utmost to stop it from happening again. Let us raise our glasses and drink a toast to individuality and the poor suckers that have kept it a reality for the West, not Drambuie, Cheers!

[Paulclem]

Paul I just realized...have you considered turning those potatoes into vodka?

.

Well... I do have 5 beds of potatoes going and a tub in the garden... have you heard of the Irish version - pocine?


It is a good job I tried it out on Turncoat first, you will be receiving the hefty vets bill very shortly. Still I found your Spicy Rum and very tasty it was too.

I should have called our dog something like that. He's Mrs Paulclem's dog, and makes it patently obvious every time he bites me. I had to chase over the green after him today as he was chasing a car - (should have left him to it, but Mrs Paulclem's wrath would see us meeting at the shed).

The rum is good - and on offer in Sainsbury's at the moment. The bill's not so tasty though...

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

In my experience those who ask the right questions usually think they know all the answers. You are so far ahead of yourself you should be careful you don't bump into yourself on the way back, this usually results in an unneccessary headache. I only tasted the stuff once and it was disgusting.

Ha, yes I've always had a problem with thinking before I act and walking too fast !

As for the "Rusty Nail", here's what I found: 1 1/2 oz Scotch whisky, 1/2 oz Drambuie and 1 twist lemon peel. Unfortunately I don't have Scotch Whiskey, but I do have some Makers Mark and Chianti.


Well... I do have 5 beds of potatoes going and a tub in the garden... have you heard of the Irish version - pocine?

I can't say that I have. Google is swaying me to "poRcine"...
"...or pork terrine made out of pig trotters and other, supplementary meats. Pig trotter terrine, vodka and pickles..
and some think Drambuie is disgusting.

.

[Calidore]

As for the "Rusty Nail", here's what I found: 1 1/2 oz Scotch whisky, 1/2 oz Drambuie and 1 twist lemon peel. Unfortunately I don't have Scotch Whiskey, but I do have some Makers Mark and Chianti.

[snip]

and some think Drambuie is disgusting.

.

If you like scotch, as I do, you'll probably like Drambuie, as it's a scotch-based liqueur. I love Rusty Nails.

[prendrelemick]

Ha, yes I've always had a problem with thinking before I act and walking too fast !

As for the "Rusty Nail", here's what I found: 1 1/2 oz Scotch whisky, 1/2 oz Drambuie and 1 twist lemon peel. Unfortunately I don't have Scotch Whiskey, but I do have some Makers Mark and Chianti.



I can't say that I have. Google is swaying me to "poRcine"...
"...or pork terrine made out of pig trotters and other, supplementary meats. Pig trotter terrine, vodka and pickles..
and some think Drambuie is disgusting.

.

Try "Potcheen".

And now here is a warning if you dont want to make your own still.

DO NOT take a 2 gallon pan with a conical shaped lid.

DO NOT half fill with fermented friut (or potato)juice.

UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES float a small bowl in the juice .

NEVER put the lid on upside down and fill with ice cubes.

Should you accidently do all this DON'T then place over a gentle heat.

[Paulclem]

Try "Potcheen".

And now here is a warning if you dont want to make your own still.

DO NOT take a 2 gallon pan with a conical shaped lid.

DO NOT half fill with fermented friut (or potato)juice.

UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES float a small bowl in the juice .

NEVER put the lid on upside down and fill with ice cubes.

Should you accidently do all this DON'T then place over a gentle heat.

Cheers. That's the one.

Any ankle cures chaps? I've got a thrumming ligament on the outside of my ankle that is givng me a bit of gyp.

[prendrelemick]

R&R unfortunately Paul, but if that is not an option I find those neoprene ankle/knee/elbow supports quite good, you can carry on while it slowly gets better.

If not, I've got an old ketchup bottle of something under the sink...



By the way chaps is anyone watching Wimbers this year? Still no one to hold a candle to the lovely Steffi. The onetime contender Maria Sharapova was looking a bit ropey this afternoon, and Hantucwhatever has gone out early. Only the Tutonic Lisicki has impressed me this year, the way she thrashed those balls around was quite magnificent.

[DocHeart]

Any ankle cures chaps? I've got a thrumming ligament on the outside of my ankle that is givng me a bit of gyp.


If you've got a good woman to bring you a can of beer while you rest it, ice it, compress it and elevate it (RICE), you'll be apples.

[The Atheist]

Any ankle cures chaps? I've got a thrumming ligament on the outside of my ankle that is givng me a bit of gyp.

Yep, RICE is the key, but if you can't get the rest, a tight crepe bandage. A standard brace probably won't give you enough support.

I'm an expert on ankles - the last time a doc saw an x-ray of my left ankle, he laughed; he said it reminded him of a bowl of spaghetti.

[Paulclem]

Thanks all. I just wondered. I've got a support from previous sprains. I had a weak left one for a few years. The found the painkiller expletive-a-mol to be most effective.

It's difficult to rest it completely. It's the busy time at work. The bike's better than stumbling around though.

I've had a pear cider tonight, and I shall put my feet up to watch the rest of Inception.



I'm an expert on ankles - the last time a doc saw an x-ray of my left ankle, he laughed; he said it reminded him of a bowl of spaghetti.

The pain is sublime - just for a couple of nanoseconds. I bet we've all had it as well. I used to laugh at my mate who would go over on his every now and then. He'd get so angry and aggressive. I'm getting the karma for that now.

I was speculating with Mrs Paulclem that they might get me one of those braces and a big boot. I don't think they do them though these days. She was rubbing her hands in glee at the thought of the Boot catching on the mudguards as I cycle to work next week.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Try "Potcheen".

And now here is a warning if you dont want to make your own still.

DO NOT take a 2 gallon pan with a conical shaped lid.

DO NOT half fill with fermented friut (or potato)juice.

UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES float a small bowl in the juice .

NEVER put the lid on upside down and fill with ice cubes.

Should you accidently do all this DON'T then place over a gentle heat.

Let me guess, either you ended up with something that was relegated to an empty ketchup bottle or the inverted ice filled lid was sucked into the pan once the heated brew cooled down.


Thanks all. I just wondered. I've got a support from previous sprains. I had a weak left one for a few years. The found the painkiller expletive-a-mol to be most effective.

It's difficult to rest it completely. It's the busy time at work. The bike's better than stumbling around though.

I've had a pear cider tonight, and I shall put my feet up to watch the rest of Inception.

Something that might take your mind off the ankle; I see that the "featured article" on Wikipedia, concerns Coenred was king of Mercia. (Midlands)
"... He was a son of the Mercian king Wulfhere, whose brother Æthelred succeeded to the throne in 675 on Wulfhere's death. In 704 Æthelred abdicated in favour of Coenred to become a monk. Coenred's reign is poorly documented, but a contemporary source records that he faced attacks from the Welsh. The same threat may later have led Æthelbald to build Wat's Dyke, a defensive earthwork on the northern Welsh frontier..."

Let's not forget Custer's Last stand (June 25th)...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QcWevSHrbiA

.

[The Atheist]

I've had a pear cider tonight...

Nectar of the gods.

Parker has a case of New Zealand's finest.


The pain is sublime - just for a couple of nanoseconds.

I'd always had trouble with mine and I made it a lot worse by playing on after rolling it on numerous occasions. Then I completely wrecked it running into a rabbit-hole while wearing tramping boots.

The weirdest thing is, due to all the damage, all the toes on my left foot are numb. Apparently the nerves were damaged as well as all the cartilege.

Lesson: stay off it until it's right!


Let's not forget Custer's Last stand...

One of my favourite events in all history, that. For a different view of it, try Frederick Forsyth's Whispering Wind.

[Paulclem]

I'd always had trouble with mine and I made it a lot worse by playing on after rolling it on numerous occasions. Then I completely wrecked it running into a rabbit-hole while wearing tramping boots.

The weirdest thing is, due to all the damage, all the toes on my left foot are numb. Apparently the nerves were damaged as well as all the cartilege.

Lesson: stay off it until it's right!

.

Nasty. I've rolled mine a few times, but not as badly as that, so I can sympathise. The most embarrassing time was outside the Salvation Army Hostel - where it is usual to see people rolling around on the floor swearing...



Something that might take your mind off the ankle; I see that the "featured article" on Wikipedia, concerns Coenred was king of Mercia. (Midlands)
"... He was a son of the Mercian king Wulfhere, whose brother Æthelred succeeded to the throne in 675 on Wulfhere's death. In 704 Æthelred abdicated in favour of Coenred to become a monk. Coenred's reign is poorly documented, but a contemporary source records that he faced attacks from the Welsh. The same threat may later have led Æthelbald to build Wat's Dyke, a defensive earthwork on the northern Welsh frontier..."


.

Thanks Gilliatt. It's a time I - and perhaps not many - know much about. That period seems to have been eclipsed by the later monarchs' histories.

There are still battles with the Welsh, but they tend to take place on the Rugby pitch these days. :D

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...One of my favourite events in all history, that. For a different view of it, try Frederick Forsyth's Whispering Wind.

Thanks for the recommendation, I'll make note of it.

.

[jocky]

If you like scotch, as I do, you'll probably like Drambuie, as it's a scotch-based liqueur. I love Rusty Nails.

Good to hear from you Calidore. Whisky is the main ingredient of Drambuie, unfortunately it is totally ruined by the addition of honey. Scotch should only be drank with water, anything else is an abomination and should be avoided at all costs. Sorry to be so picky but one can speak rubbish about every subject imaginable on the Cold Ale thread but we take our booze very seriously. Shee you later, hic.

[The Atheist]

There are still battles with the Welsh, but they tend to take place on the Rugby pitch these days. :D

I'll just say 1953.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Good to hear from you Calidore. Whisky is the main ingredient of Drambuie, unfortunately it is totally ruined by the addition of honey. Scotch should only be drank with water, anything else is an abomination and should be avoided at all costs. Sorry to be so picky but one can speak rubbish about every subject imaginable on the Cold Ale thread but we take our booze very seriously. Shee you later, hic.

Honey!, so that's why my my hand sticks to the bottle neck. Jocky, I'm inclined to agree with you; the Drambuie, on it's own, is rough going. I'm about half way through the bottle and I'm still searching for something to make it a little more palatable.
Is does make a good elixir against mosquitoes.
I tried some in my coffee this morning and that isn't too bad. How my Grandmother managed to knock down bottles of this stuff is beyond me.

.

[The Atheist]

... the Drambuie, on it's own, is rough going. I'm about half way through the bottle and I'm still searching for something to make it a little more palatable.

Believe it or not: beer.

Drop one shot in a half pint. Thank Tom Sharpe.

[DocHeart]

Good to hear from you Calidore. Whisky is the main ingredient of Drambuie, unfortunately it is totally ruined by the addition of honey. Scotch should only be drank with water, anything else is an abomination and should be avoided at all costs. Sorry to be so picky but one can speak rubbish about every subject imaginable on the Cold Ale thread but we take our booze very seriously. Shee you later, hic.

The man speaks the truth. Parker, a double for my friend here please. What car keys? I ain't got no car, sold it. Oh alright, here, take the bloody car keys.

[jocky]

Has anyone seen Turncoat ? I sent him to collect my copy of The Times three days ago, he knows how much I like the crossword, and he has not been seen since. I am devestated I have left a huge bone outside the kitchen door and have even filled his favourite hole in the driveway with muddy water, he likes to sneak into the kitchen and shake his coat while we are having a dinner party. Mrs Jocky has as usual been no help, she said " It is all your own fault you should have never gave him that twenty pound note in the first place. " Mans best friend my eye.

[The Atheist]

Twenty poounds! Why a dog could travel to Cornwall on that!

Has he maybe gone to visit HRH Prince Charles' Jack Russells?

[prendrelemick]

I'm a bit worried about Paul, apparently if you play Stairway to Heaven backwards there is a satanic message about sheds! And Paul has two of them.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qwiba6_LYP0&feature=related

[The Atheist]

... apparently if you play Stairway to Heaven backwards ...

... it sounds a lot better.

[Paulclem]

I'm a bit worried about Paul, apparently if you play Stairway to Heaven backwards there is a satanic message about sheds! And Paul has two of them.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qwiba6_LYP0&feature=related

But I have three....bwahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

Yes there are two sheds you can go buy
But in the long run
It still pays to get a third one on

dum dum dum di di dum dum di di dum dum dum...

[jocky]

But I have three....bwahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

Yes there are two sheds you can go buy
But in the long run
It still pays to get a third one on

dum dum dum di di dum dum di di dum dum dum...

I might have known you would have three sheds whereas I , being a mere mortal, can only boast two. However, it is the quality of the sheds and not the quantity that counts.

For example, completely ignore this post as I messed up downloading pictures.

[Paulclem]

I might have known you would have three sheds whereas I , being a mere mortal, can only boast two. However, it is the quality of the sheds and not the quantity that counts.

That's right. Two are good for demolition being virtually derelict. My best shed is not in the best of conditions, though it is sturdy.

In fact my former allotment neighbour is referred to by the committee as "Two Sheds" as an homage to John Prescott. His sheds are of fine and pristine quality. He had the allotment side with the shed the day before we moved in, and never offered to share the space for out tools. He then built another one just to mock us. "Two Sheds" ...given time I would have come up with something more...direct....

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

I'm a bit worried about Paul, apparently if you play Stairway to Heaven backwards there is a satanic message about sheds! And Paul has two of them.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qwiba6_LYP0&feature=related

Haha. I recall during high school, a local chucrh sponsored an album burning one night. The buzz at school the next day claimed that a Led Zepplin album refused to burn and that it levitated in the flames.


But I have three....bwahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

Yes there are two sheds you can go buy
But in the long run
It still pays to get a third one on

dum dum dum di di dum dum di di dum dum dum...

Be careful Paul, it's not too early to begin thinking of this year's play!.........bwahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!

[soundofmusic]

In my experience those who ask the right questions usually think they know all the answers. You are so far ahead of yourself you should be careful you don't bump into yourself on the way back, this usually results in an unneccessary headache. I only tasted the stuff once and it was disgusting.



Yes, it is clearly an unfortunate repercussion of the herd mentality, I will do my utmost to stop it from happening again. Let us raise our glasses and drink a toast to individuality and the poor suckers that have kept it a reality for the West, not Drambuie, Cheers!

It's one am, I will raise my glass to anything right now...though, I don't think I'll do it with scotch, maybe a bit of rum or some chick drink.


Well... I do have 5 beds of potatoes going and a tub in the garden... have you heard of the Irish version - pocine?



I should have called our dog something like that. He's Mrs Paulclem's dog, and makes it patently obvious every time he bites me. I had to chase over the green after him today as he was chasing a car - (should have left him to it, but Mrs Paulclem's wrath would see us meeting at the shed).

The rum is good - and on offer in Sainsbury's at the moment. The bill's not so tasty though...

What sort of potatoes are they; I've just discovered I really like those tiny red fellows...made a smashing cheese dish with them the other night.
Is the dog the reason for the bad ankle?


Ha, yes I've always had a problem with thinking before I act and walking too fast !

As for the "Rusty Nail", here's what I found: 1 1/2 oz Scotch whisky, 1/2 oz Drambuie and 1 twist lemon peel. Unfortunately I don't have Scotch Whiskey, but I do have some Makers Mark and Chianti.



I can't say that I have. Google is swaying me to "poRcine"...
"...or pork terrine made out of pig trotters and other, supplementary meats. Pig trotter terrine, vodka and pickles..
and some think Drambuie is disgusting.

.

Ah, ever since the first Mr Sounds spent every night of the last year of our marriage with a gallon of Chianti, I have had rather a prejudice against it...of course, it smelled a bit worse after spending a night on the floor with my sounds:puke:


If you like scotch, as I do, you'll probably like Drambuie, as it's a scotch-based liqueur. I love Rusty Nails.

Hello Calidore...welcome...


Try "Potcheen".

And now here is a warning if you dont want to make your own still.

DO NOT take a 2 gallon pan with a conical shaped lid.

DO NOT half fill with fermented friut (or potato)juice.

UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES float a small bowl in the juice .

NEVER put the lid on upside down and fill with ice cubes.

Should you accidently do all this DON'T then place over a gentle heat.

I want a video of this...or maybe you can tell us what happened....


If you've got a good woman to bring you a can of beer while you rest it, ice it, compress it and elevate it (RICE), you'll be apples.

Or perhaps he could train Mrs. P's dog to bring him a beer; the dogs nature might change if he shared it with him. We have a large red neck population in our area and a good many beer lapping/weed smoking pitbulls.


Yep, RICE is the key, but if you can't get the rest, a tight crepe bandage. A standard brace probably won't give you enough support.

I'm an expert on ankles - the last time a doc saw an x-ray of my left ankle, he laughed; he said it reminded him of a bowl of spaghetti.
I think you missed your calling Atheist, you should have become a doctor; after 4 children, you have probably seen and dealt with it all.

[Paulclem]

What sort of potatoes are they; I've just discovered I really like those tiny red fellows...made a smashing cheese dish with them the other night.
Is the dog the reason for the bad ankle?


I have to confess to showing off down at the allotment by carrying two bags of compost on my shoulder up to my plot. The guys were joshing me and said I bet you can't run. I said I can and jogged up to my plot with them. The upshot was that I strained the ligament on the outside of my ankle. It wasn't too bad though, but worsened after I had to go chasing after the dog - who was running after a van up onto a busy road. I did curse. Mrs Paulclem is eagerly awaiting our next visit in order to relate my misfortune to the guys at the Allotment shop. Joshings are coming. :lol:

By the way - the Potcheen, (Mick put me right there), is a potato based spirit brewed by the Irish. I've tasted some from a former landlord. Suffice to say, you don't get to drink it; you just absorb it through your mouth.

[The Atheist]

I think you missed your calling Atheist, you should have become a doctor; after 4 children, you have probably seen and dealt with it all.

My bedside manner would have ruined it.


I have to confess to showing off down at the allotment by carrying two bags of compost on my shoulder up to my plot.

:smilielol5:

The karma of hubris.

[prendrelemick]

In for breakfast this morning, and found Mrs P grinning mischievously waving aloft a 2 ft long tape. "Look" she said, "you've been sent a testicle tape." She began to read the instructions, "Measure widest circumference of testicles-" The tape was colour coded, red amber and green, to get in the green zone one would've required testicles 34 to 50 cm in circumference. I began to feel inadequate. She read on "- feel to check tone,-" No problem there, I am a bloke after all and do so several times a day, "- ensure there are no lumps.-" I was about to check again when she read the last part. "- Consult vet for thorough check."

"Ha ha very funny" I replied as she removed her thumb from the "Mature Ram testicle tape" label.

[DocHeart]

Or perhaps he could train Mrs. P's dog to bring him a beer; the dogs nature might change if he shared it with him. We have a large red neck population in our area and a good many beer lapping/weed smoking pitbulls.




Sorry -- have I just been told off for being politically incorrect in the Bloke's Thread? I do apologize. I have total respect for women and their personalities and all that jazz. Parker, another of what the lady is having, if you please.

DH

P.S. Oh, I almost forgot, here's a list of malicious nouns, adjectives and transcendental modifiers (?) that men often maliciously use to refer to women:

chick
broad
tomato
Her indoors
my old woman
the wee wifie
She Who Shall Never Parallel-park


P.P.S. You know I love you, right? ;)


Sorry -- have I just been told off for being politically incorrect in the Bloke's Thread? I do apologize. I have total respect for women and their personalities and all that jazz. Parker, another of what the lady is having, if you please.

DH

P.S. Oh, I almost forgot, here's a list of malicious nouns, adjectives and transcendental modifiers (?) that men often maliciously use to refer to women:

chick
broad
tomato
Her indoors
my old woman
the wee wifie
She Who Shall Never Parallel-park


P.P.S. You know I love you, right? ;)


Actually I just re-read the whole thing and it doesn't look like I was told off, after all. I just misunderstood the first time and rushed to answer. Damn. And it was the funniest thing I've written in weeks.

Good health to all. :)

[jocky]

Or perhaps he could train Mrs. P's dog to bring him a beer; the dogs nature might change if he shared it with him. We have a large red neck population in our area and a good many beer lapping/weed smoking pitbulls.




You are a dark one, you never once mentioned you had relocated to Scotland. :)


In for breakfast this morning, and found Mrs P grinning mischievously waving aloft a 2 ft long tape. "Look" she said, "you've been sent a testicle tape." She began to read the instructions, "Measure widest circumference of testicles-" The tape was colour coded, red amber and green, to get in the green zone one would've required testicles 34 to 50 cm in circumference. I began to feel inadequate. She read on "- feel to check tone,-" No problem there, I am a bloke after all and do so several times a day, "- ensure there are no lumps.-" I was about to check again when she read the last part. "- Consult vet for thorough check."

"Ha ha very funny" I replied as she removed her thumb from the "Mature Ram testicle tape" label.

:lol::lol:

What would we do without our wives ?

[Paulclem]

Testicle tape...lots of potential in the pub there for joshing the blokes. Just get rid of the vet reference. Some geezer is bound to end up with the nickname "ramsbollocks". It has a certain ring to it.

Thieving dogs
Prince Charles' Jack Russels
Satanic Sheds - Led Zeppellin's original name
A case of Highland envy - shedwise
An annoying neighbour
Mystical levitating albums
A proposal for this year's Blokes Thread Play
Sounds drinking habits/ potato cheese dishes/ the trouble with chianti/ a welcome/ a request for an illicit substance's recipe/ the Miami demographic/ careers advice
Testicle Tape - Ill never forget
A telling off/ un-PC ness/ a realisation
Specualtion about a relocation/ praise for the qualities of wives
A tip for using Testicle tape

All this on one page? That's what I call value for money.

[The Atheist]

All this on one page? That's what I call value for money.

Like I keep saying, best thread on the entire internet.

You couldn't buy this stuff.

Although anyone wanting to pay us should certainly post details!

[prendrelemick]

Today is the day. The battle of the blondes over at Wimbers. Can that pinnicle of agressive German womanhood -Sabine Lisicki, beat the willowy strength of Russian Maria Sharapova.

O, and some other women are in the other semi final too.

[jocky]

Today is the day. The battle of the blondes over at Wimbers. Can that pinnicle of agressive German womanhood -Sabine Lisicki, beat the willowy strength of Russian Maria Sharapova.

O, and some other women are in the other semi final too.

I will grant you they are a lovely pair, but who can forget the beauties of Yesteryear who graced the centre-court, Billie Jean King, Martina Navratilova, Yvonne Goolagong and the sensuous Virginia Wade? They were enough to bring tears to a man's eyes, quite literally !

[The Atheist]

I will grant you they are a lovely pair, but who can forget the beauties of Yesteryear who graced the centre-court, Billie Jean King, Martina Navratilova, Yvonne Goolagong and the sensuous Virginia Wade? They were enough to bring tears to a man's eyes, quite literally !

I can remember all of them. BJK and MN were a bit on the butch side, although Martina has reinvented herself as many times as Madonna.

Even when they were playing, we had Chris Evert, Gabriella Sabatini and a few others to look at. And Bjorn Borg.

[Paulclem]

The Tour De France starts tomorrow. I shall be up late - the time when control of the TV is within my grasp - watching the thrills and spills around the scenic countryside of France. Well the highlights anyway.

[jocky]

The Tour De France starts tomorrow. I shall be up late - the time when control of the TV is within my grasp - watching the thrills and spills around the scenic countryside of France. Well the highlights anyway.

Aye, it is exciting watching a front wheel touching a rear wheel on the mountain stages and watching the cyclists tumbling down the Alps or Pyrenees. Then to see the sprint to the finish knowing damn well that the winner is full of masked steroids. It does kind of take the shine off the forthcoming olympics.

I always thought the TV control was in my grasp when Mrs Jocky was working nights until I accidentally pressed Sexcetera only to be informed that this channel is not available. After much deliberation I realised she who must be obeyed had configured the parental controls. It did not help in the morning when she came home and enquired, with a wicked smile,

"Was the telly good Jocky, what did you watch ?"

The Magic Roundabout. :(

[The Atheist]

:D

Oh, the joys of Scotland in the summer!

Unlike NZ, where although the winter has been ridiculously mild, the viruses have tried to make up for it by coming up with the most-virulent and violent influenza I've seen to date. The Great Piggy 'Flu Scare was but a cold compared to this year's event.

For the past ten days I have had the two sickest kids you've ever seen outside a hospital! Temperatures >39/103, coughing like terminal TB patients, throats burning like acid.....

Thankfully, I was vaccinated against it. This bug will be mowing them down like a combine harvester in the old folks' homes of the country.

You northern hemisphere types, let me advise you right now to make sure you get vaccinated this year!

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

:D

...For the past ten days I have had the two sickest kids you've ever seen outside a hospital! Temperatures >39/103, coughing like terminal TB patients, throats burning like acid.....


Everyone around here (Texas) is running a 100F + fever, due to the fact that it is 100+ outside! As the saying goes; "It's hotter than hell's half acre"
Hope the kids get well soon.


Oh, by the way Jocky, I believe I saw Turncoat and Bartok heading west to Roswell. I figur they plan to take part in the upcoming July 8th celebrations.

.

[Paulclem]

Aye, it is exciting watching a front wheel touching a rear wheel on the mountain stages and watching the cyclists tumbling down the Alps or Pyrenees. Then to see the sprint to the finish knowing damn well that the winner is full of masked steroids. It does kind of take the shine off the forthcoming olympics.

I always thought the TV control was in my grasp when Mrs Jocky was working nights until I accidentally pressed Sexcetera only to be informed that this channel is not available. After much deliberation I realised she who must be obeyed had configured the parental controls. It did not help in the morning when she came home and enquired, with a wicked smile,

"Was the telly good Jocky, what did you watch ?"

The Magic Roundabout. :(

Day one and there was a forty bike pile up that reconfigured the ending. Dramatic stuff.

I hpe the kids get well too Atheist. My wife usually gets the flu jab along with the elderlies.

[prendrelemick]

Been reading the blurb that came with my testicle tape, it is printed on a card the shape of a Ram's scrotal sac and comes with several dire warnings for the Mature Ram including this one:-

"The scrotum is rich in sweat glands that cool the testicles if it is allowed to hang in the breeze. However, sheep will pant and lie down when the are hot. By doing this, rams are lying on their testicles and cooking them."

A warning I think all chaps should take heed of - especially in Texas!

[Paulclem]

Been reading the blurb that came with my testicle tape, it is printed on a card the shape of a Ram's scrotal sac and comes with several dire warnings for the Mature Ram including this one:-

"The scrotum is rich in sweat glands that cool the testicles if it is allowed to hang in the breeze. However, sheep will pant and lie down when the are hot. By doing this, rams are lying on their testicles and cooking them."

A warning I think all chaps should take heed of - especially in Texas!

There you go Gilliatt. You'd better hang them out...just to be sure...

Actually it's been a bit warm here today...

[The Atheist]

:smilielol5:

When the gold runs out in Jo'burg, they will start mining the comedy in this thread!

Mick's testicle tapes are about 25 Troy ounces on their own.

(Kids are improving now, thanks!)

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...However, sheep will pant and lie down when the are hot. By doing this, rams are lying on their testicles and cooking them."

A warning I think all chaps should take heed of - especially in Texas!


There you go Gilliatt. You'd better hang them out...just to be sure...


Not to worry gentlemen, in Texas the men and Rams begin sleeping on their backs at the turn of the summer solstice.

.

[Paulclem]

Not to worry gentlemen, in Texas the men and Rams begin sleeping on their backs at the turn of the summer solstice.

.

I can't do that unfortunately. I snore like a ram on the rampage, or rather I'm told i do. I have seen no evidence of the truth of the statement just the results of the claim which is sore ribs and back of a morning. (Mrs Paulclem is intolerant of snoring. Either that or she needs an excuse for prone, small hours boxercise).

[jocky]

I can't do that unfortunately. I snore like a ram on the rampage, or rather I'm told i do. I have seen no evidence of the truth of the statement just the results of the claim which is sore ribs and back of a morning. (Mrs Paulclem is intolerant of snoring. Either that or she needs an excuse for prone, small hours boxercise).

Have you ever considered the possibility she may be telling whoppers and using your sinus problems as a smokescreen giving her the justification to beat you up during the night ? :)

I believe that my phone may have been hacked by News International and that Rebekah Brooks has ordered her private investigators to get me. It is one thing to reveal all my grubby secrets on the Cold Ale thread but quite another to have me and Mrs Jockys telephone rows splashed all over the News of the World. I am just relieved that Bartok and Turncoat have fled the country for the sanctuary of Roswell.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

I can't do that unfortunately. I snore like a ram on the rampage, or rather I'm told i do. I have seen no evidence of the truth of the statement just the results of the claim which is sore ribs and back of a morning. (Mrs Paulclem is intolerant of snoring. Either that or she needs an excuse for prone, small hours boxercise).

Funny!
I've had a few of those night time assaults as well some due to snoring, but the worst beatings result from unintended "dutch ovens".


...I believe that my phone may have been hacked by News International and that Rebekah Brooks has ordered her private investigators to get me. It is one thing to reveal all my grubby secrets on the Cold Ale thread but quite another to have me and Mrs Jockys telephone rows splashed all over the News of the World. I am just relieved that Bartok and Turncoat have fled the country for the sanctuary of Roswell.

Haha!
Not to worry Jocky. Just hold on a few more days until the 8th and all will be revealed in Roswell. Cell signals will be scrambled, genetically altered pigeons and unfaithful dogs will stand together as one, in awe of extra terrestrial manifestations.
That's it, I've had too much...good night.

.

[prendrelemick]

Have you ever considered the possibility she may be telling whoppers and using your sinus problems as a smokescreen giving her the justification to beat you up during the night ? :)

I believe that my phone may have been hacked by News International and that Rebekah Brooks has ordered her private investigators to get me. It is one thing to reveal all my grubby secrets on the Cold Ale thread but quite another to have me and Mrs Jockys telephone rows splashed all over the News of the World. I am just relieved that Bartok and Turncoat have fled the country for the sanctuary of Roswell.


In a way you are fortunate to have a life worth splashing jocky. Ms. Brooks was very disappointed with my intimate text conversations with Mrs P :-

16.30: wots 4 T

16.32: dunno

16.36: ok c u L8r.


Needles to say the Paps have been recalled.

[The Atheist]

I believe that my phone may have been hacked by News International and that Rebekah Brooks has ordered her private investigators to get me. It is one thing to reveal all my grubby secrets on the Cold Ale thread but quite another to have me and Mrs Jockys telephone rows splashed all over the News of the World. I am just relieved that Bartok and Turncoat have fled the country for the sanctuary of Roswell.

Whoa! That is turning into the ugliest thing since Joseph Merrick.

Can we bring back the death penalty just for this crowd? And their readers.

[MarkBastable]

I have a new car.

This is not the sort of thing that I usually talk about, but I felt left out of the thread, and I reckon that this is the kind of news that a real man would mention.

It's black and it has a friendly face.

[prendrelemick]

You were doing great untill you mentioned the friendly face. We men have a stereotype to live up to you know.

What's its max talk...or tourque.. or how many kilometers to the mile do you get and other manly things?