Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

[prendrelemick]

On to a serious subject guys and gal. Why are we not responding to the Pakistan crisis as we should ? I take it as read we all have standing orders to Save The Children and other good causes but why are we responding so slowly to this one? It may be for political reasons and the fact that the World Banks have made it difficult, but kids are kids and I for one do not find life easy when somebody else's children are hungry, emaciated and starving. It kind of takes the shine off of life.

We have sent double our usual natural disaster donation, because of the lack of response. I think the reasons are political and cultural (A euphenism for racist?). Pakistan has had a bad press lately, and there is a generally held belief that the local Pakistani community do not contribute to such relief funds when disaster strikes in other countries.

Also, I must admit while transferring the money I did not feel confident it would get to where it was needed. I think this is the major problem.



[/QUOTE=prendrelemick;941853]Tis strange indeed. Whilst on the same quest, I was crossing a blasted heath, when I heard a cackleing of voices and a clicking of high heels coming from a lonely coffee house, the night was dark and damp, so I entered...

http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k78/prendrelemick/mac.jpg



.[/QUOTE]

I'm so glad there has been no suggestions as to the identities of the above.

[dafydd manton]

I'd start going to a different pub if I were you.

Good point about donations to Pakistan, certainly from Britain. Racism is not too strong a word.

[prendrelemick]

I never knew what you went through; thank god I'm female so I don't have to live a painful life of wedlock with one.




..:flare:



once again you prove that Irony is not just for ironing shirteries.

[dafydd manton]

Mick, can't tell from a tiny photo on a laptop. INRA 410 or Cheviot? or am I way off the mark?

[prendrelemick]

Texel cross Derbyshire Gritstone.

[dafydd manton]

You'd have thought living here I'd have recognised them! Tend to get more Blackface round here. Or, believe it or not, Herdwick.

[The Atheist]

I thought I saw a couple of boxes of viagra in the pile and Parker stood me up when I went in to slip on my size 22 bikini...:flare:

Not likely.

The only reason Viagra ever gets used by Blokes' Club members is in mountain climbing.


On to a serious subject guys and gal. Why are we not responding to the Pakistan crisis as we should ? I take it as read we all have standing orders to Save The Children and other good causes but why are we responding so slowly to this one? It may be for political reasons and the fact that the World Banks have made it difficult, but kids are kids and I for one do not find life easy when somebody else's children are hungry, emaciated and starving. It kind of takes the shine off of life.

I missed this, but it's an excellent point, because you've hit a nasty fact right on the head. In NZ, we have a good relationship with Pakistan - despite them beating us in the World Cup final in when it was held in Auckland and collections here have been as strong as any other disaster relief, so it can only be racism that's making the difference. It is a sad indictment on people that it happens.

I understand that muslin countries haven't responded well as well - could that be because Pakistan is seen as being too much on "our" side? Funny old world when both sides perceive Pakistan as not our friend and as you rightly note, the Pakistani kids have been left in the middle.

[The Atheist]

I missed this, but it's an excellent point, because you've hit a nasty fact right on the head.

Or, possibly not a fact at all.

Jocky - your anecdote about Britons not giving to Pakistan may be wrong:

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/asia/uk-shaming-world-on-pakistan-appeal-2059705.html

Whether Britain is "shaming the world" is unknown, but it's clear that the UK total so far is more than 20% of the entire world total, so they're certainly in the leading division at the very least.

Two weeks into the appeal and the total is 29 million pounds. Going by previous appeals, it looks as though the total will be respectably near, or even greater than recent offshore disasters:

http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/10571665

[dafydd manton]

Not meant as a divisive comment, but I can't help wondering if the vast majority of that is from the Ex-pat Pakistani populace, who always seem to have outstanding generosity within their communities. I sspect that it might be the case.

[soundofmusic]

once again you prove that Irony is not just for ironing shirteries.

:cornut: It would save so much unpleasantness if people realized that what you may like looking at in the store window or magazine cover; doesn't always belong in your house.


Not likely.

The only reason Viagra ever gets used by Blokes' Club members is in mountain climbing.



Mountain climbing...is that an analogy...maybe parker was planing on coming back to the whirlpool:ciappa:

[The Atheist]

Not meant as a divisive comment, but I can't help wondering if the vast majority of that is from the Ex-pat Pakistani populace, who always seem to have outstanding generosity within their communities. I sspect that it might be the case.

Yes, that could be it too.

Certainly a lot more Pakistanis than Haitians in UK.



Mountain climbing...is that an analogy...maybe parker was planing on coming back to the whirlpool:ciappa:

No, it isn't an analogy.

The only worthwhile use of Viagra is in combating altitude sickness. Works better than cocaine, apparently. It's also much cheaper and a lot less likely to get you thrown in jail!

[The Atheist]

I just had to post this.

Check out the posting stats between this and that sheilas' thread.

[dafydd manton]

Ha! We're one ahead, lads, and that's without interminable conversations about vacuum cleaners and ear-rings! Tremendous coincidence, that both were on 3511.

They said it would never last. They scoffed.. They doubted, but here we all are, as erudite and well-informed as ever, and discussing the Serious things of life!!

By the way, anybody know Daisy Duke's vital statistics?

[The Atheist]

Ha! We're one ahead, lads, and that's without interminable conversations about vacuum cleaners and ear-rings! Tremendous coincidence, that both were on 3511.

They said it would never last. They scoffed.. They doubted, but here we all are, as erudite and well-informed as ever, and discussing the Serious things of life!!

Not to mention not having to put up with that awful brown gunge that smells like stale cats' pee.

Pass me a beer!


By the way, anybody know Daisy Duke's vital statistics?

No, but I can volunteer to find out?

One lovely thing today, as winter tries to give us a last blast - the sun coming up this morning. A red sky that correctly boded ill for the day, but regardless of that, a sky full of at 6.20 am.

The sun's coming over our way for while, sorry!

[soundofmusic]

Yes, that could be it too.

Certainly a lot more Pakistanis than Haitians in UK.



No, it isn't an analogy.

The only worthwhile use of Viagra is in combating altitude sickness. Works better than cocaine, apparently. It's also much cheaper and a lot less likely to get you thrown in jail!

I am going to try asking my GP for viagra for altitude sickness and see what she says...I used Bonine last time and nearly died when I tried alcohol with it

Daisy Duke: birth: 1954, 5'8 inches, 36-23-35; now whether that was in the day, or not, I don't know...

[dafydd manton]

How the blazes do you find these things out? No, on second thoughts, don't tell me........... I don't think I could take it!

[Paulclem]

I am going to try asking my GP for viagra for altitude sickness and see what she says...I used Bonine last time and nearly died when I tried alcohol with it

Daisy Duke: birth: 1954, 5'8 inches, 36-23-35; now whether that was in the day, or not, I don't know...

Are you off mountain climbing Sounds?

[soundofmusic]

How the blazes do you find these things out? No, on second thoughts, don't tell me........... I don't think I could take it!

You can practically find out anything with google; but, I'm still trying to figure out why, with all the popularity you blokes have with the young ladies; the old cougars are still favorites?


Are you off mountain climbing Sounds?

:blush2: One of my former youthful admirers refered to Sounds as a mountain that was once worth climbing...I was alittle hurt by the past tense

[OrphanPip]

No, it isn't an analogy.

The only worthwhile use of Viagra is in combating altitude sickness. Works better than cocaine, apparently. It's also much cheaper and a lot less likely to get you thrown in jail!

Cocaine is a vasoconstrictor, I'd think it would make altitude sickness even worse, you would have a harder time getting oxygen to your brain. Viagra causes vasodilation, a quick google search turned up some French study that it helps with oxygen uptake at higher altitudes, more than a placebo at least.

A lot of rural Columbians seem to chew Coca to help with the nausea caused by altitude sickness. I'm not so sure it would be a good idea to snort a line of coke while climbing the Andes though.

[dafydd manton]

Aye, least of all if you happen to be the pilot...................!

[Paulclem]

:blush2: One of my former youthful admirers refered to Sounds as a mountain that was once worth climbing...I was alittle hurt by the past tense

I hope you made your point - with an ice axe.

As a bloke i am used to denigrating comments about my person - as have been discussed many times in this thread. Rhino skin helps and a certain - I'm over forty - what do I care? I'm not trying to impress anyone anymore - type attitude.

I think it's somewhat different for ladies though.

[prendrelemick]

Any ideas who or what I can sacrifice to the weather gods, so I can get the silage done?
its nearly september for Heavens sake! (Or Hades'sake or Valhalla's sake I dont care). I want three fine days in a row please.

[dafydd manton]

Any ideas who or what I can sacrifice to the weather gods, so I can get the silage done?
its nearly september for Heavens sake! (Or Hades'sake or Valhalla's sake I dont care). I want three fine days in a row please.


Ask Scher - she's all-powerful!! (I don't mean sacrifice Scher, I meant a sacrifice to Scher.........................) Oh, when you get to the bootm of the hole, stop diggin, Manton!

[The Atheist]

You can practically find out anything with google; but, I'm still trying to figure out why, with all the popularity you blokes have with the young ladies; the old cougars are still favorites?

Old fiddles play good tunes.

;)



:blush2: One of my former youthful admirers refered to Sounds as a mountain that was once worth climbing...I was alittle hurt by the past tense

Damn Philistine! Send him to Parker for remedial lessons on how to treat a lady.

I can still hear the screams from the last one like that.

*shudder*


Viagra causes vasodilation, a quick google search turned up some French study that it helps with oxygen uptake at higher altitudes, more than a placebo at least.

Yes, it's another handy side-effect, but I don't know whether the young female customs officers are impressed by it!


A lot of rural Columbians seem to chew Coca to help with the nausea caused by altitude sickness. I'm not so sure it would be a good idea to snort a line of coke while climbing the Andes though.

Correct! But "chewing coca leaves" doesn't have the same impact.

:D


Any ideas who or what I can sacrifice to the weather gods, so I can get the silage done?
its nearly september for Heavens sake! (Or Hades'sake or Valhalla's sake I dont care). I want three fine days in a row please.

Done.

I have just now sacrificed three virgins, a cat and a prize charolais bull in the name of Freyr (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freyr).

Fine weather for the next week for you.

[dafydd manton]

It isn't Friday here, yet, so that might be a bit premature. How on earth did you find three vir........oh, never mind!

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...One of my former youthful admirers refered to Sounds as a mountain that was once worth climbing...I was alittle hurt by the past tense

The hills are still alive in Florida!


Any ideas who or what I can sacrifice to the weather gods, so I can get the silage done?


Don't forget the dung we chatted about many moons ago.
I can ship some of the prized Dumas stuff if you like. "...in shades of blue and green"

.

[soundofmusic]

I hope you made your point - with an ice axe.

As a bloke i am used to denigrating comments about my person - as have been discussed many times in this thread. Rhino skin helps and a certain - I'm over forty - what do I care? I'm not trying to impress anyone anymore - type attitude.

I think it's somewhat different for ladies though.

I'm not trying to impress anymore; but the blows seem to have more effect than they once did.
I don't know if this bloke would have even noticed if a pick axe went through the side of his head...


Any ideas who or what I can sacrifice to the weather gods, so I can get the silage done?
its nearly september for Heavens sake! (Or Hades'sake or Valhalla's sake I dont care). I want three fine days in a row please.

The weather gods have forsaken us all this year; we had a few breezy days and I thought we might have an early autum; but it's back to the high 90's
and they're warning us there is a stomach virus in our beaches...


Old fiddles play good tunes.

;)
Damn Philistine! Send him to Parker for remedial lessons on how to treat a lady.

I can still hear the screams from the last one like that.

*shudder*



Done.

I have just now sacrificed three virgins, a cat and a prize charolais bull in the name of Freyr (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Freyr).

Fine weather for the next week for you.

Right you are; and the strings vibrate more...Tell Parker to give him an extra lash for me...
Can you manage a few low humidity days in florida while you're at it..


The hills are still alive in Florida!


.

Yep, though gravity is causing the valleys to deepen...:ack2:

[prendrelemick]

The hills are still alive in Florida!



Don't forget the dung we chatted about many moons ago.
I can ship some of the prized Dumas stuff if you like. "...in shades of blue and green"

.

Ahh, a kind of burnt offering. Then if it doesnt stop raining we threaten to "offer" some more.:angelsad2:

[The Atheist]

I don't know if this bloke would have even noticed if a pick axe went through the side of his head...

Jesus, there are a lot of people like that in the world.



The weather gods have forsaken us all this year; we had a few breezy days and I thought we might have an early autum; but it's back to the high 90's
and they're warning us there is a stomach virus in our beaches...

Lovely!

I must say, I've always wondered why USA built their retirement state in the middle of a tropical swamp. Helps weed out the sick, I guess.



Right you are; and the strings vibrate more...Tell Parker to give him an extra lash for me...
Can you manage a few low humidity days in florida while you're at it..


Ahh, a kind of burnt offering. Then if it doesnt stop raining we threaten to "offer" some more.:angelsad2:

I'll have a go, but I'm struggling with some persistent rain here right now!

:D

I think I called Mick's over to NZ.

Has it stopped raining yet??

[prendrelemick]

I can confirm we have had a change in the weather, its now COLD as well as wet.

[dafydd manton]

Ahhhh - a British summer. Isn't Yorkshire wonderful!

[Paulclem]

I can confirm we have had a change in the weather, its now COLD as well as wet.

Don't forget the wind. Wet cold and windy. Lovely August.

[The Atheist]

One of those virgins must have lied! Crikey, she was only 43 and three kids, but she swore she was a virgin.

Righto. Instead of messing about with these ancient pre-Druid remedies, today being Sunday, I'm holding a full-on, Dennis Wheatley-style Black Mass.

That rain will be gone by Monday morning GMT, and then no more than 5 mm before Friday afternoon.

[prendrelemick]

Well I sneaked half the silage in between downpours, the rest is lying in the field quietly composting.

However Athiest's intercession may be working, there is fine weather on the way (honestly). He must know a powerful Diety to vanquish the August Bank Holiday Rain Sprite, wno has held sway in these parts since time immemorial.

[dafydd manton]

I think he's swayed a bit further south of you - it's raining sideways here, although I don't have to worry about silage. Hope you get it sorted!

[Emil Miller]

[QUOTE=prendrelemick;946139]Well I sneaked half the silage in between downpours, the rest is lying in the field quietly composting. QUOTE]

I'd come up and give you a hand but I've forgotten where I put my smock and gaiters. I've mislaid my pitchfork a well.

[jocky]

Anyone for cricket ? :)

[prendrelemick]

Dafydd: Is that a Ruddy Duck you have there?

Brian: Dapper as ever, One dosn't always dress for silage time, an informal lounge suit will suffice.

Jocky: You betcha!

[dafydd manton]

No, Mick, the ruddy duck's a Mandarin. I'm fattening it up, then it's destined for the old orange sauce. Parker has an excellent recipe. Best served with a decent Claret, they tell me.

[Emil Miller]

No, Mick, the ruddy duck's a Mandarin. I'm fattening it up, then it's destined for the old orange sauce. Parker has an excellent recipe. Best served with a decent Claret, they tell me.

I'm sure that Parker will recommend a good Burgundy which is the usual wine for wildfowl but is not recommended for a Big Mac and fries. One would hope that, should you invite Prendrelemick to partake of the duck a l'orange, he will not cause embarrassment by asking Parker for a bottle of Newkie.:eek2:

[Paulclem]

Dafydd: Is that a Ruddy Duck you have there?

Brian: Dapper as ever, One dosn't always dress for silage time, an informal lounge suit will suffice.

Jocky: You betcha!

:lol:

[prendrelemick]

Ay up Paul mi owd mucker, did you watch the Challenge Cup final on Saturday?

[Emil Miller]

Dafydd: Is that a Ruddy Duck you have there?

Brian: Dapper as ever, One dosn't always dress for silage time, an informal lounge suit will suffice.

Jocky: You betcha!

I haven't worn a suit for years, the last one I had had to be donated to a clothing charity on account of the waist size having unaccountably shrunk so as to be unwearable.

[jocky]

Jocky: You betcha!

:)

It is so refreshing to find out that my Southerly neighbours are not the only ones adept at cheating. No balls is a worrying new trend in the genteel art of cricket. Eunuch said. :)

[prendrelemick]

I always thought Scottish sword dancing would be more fertile ground for betting on no balls. One slip, and Bob's your auntie.

[jocky]

I always thought Scottish sword dancing would be more fertile ground for betting on no balls. One slip, and Bob's your auntie.

Man you are right there. One slip in the sword dance and tossing your caber goes right out the window.

[Taliesin]

If I find the bloody bastard who stole my bike this evening...

[jocky]

If I find the bloody bastard who stole my bike this evening...

:)

You will give him a five hundred pounds reward, as all that exercise was killing you.

[Paulclem]

Ay up Paul mi owd mucker, did you watch the Challenge Cup final on Saturday?

Missed it! Missed virtually the whole season. The games aren't usually on at a time when i can get hold of the remote. (I'm last in the pressing order).

I thought Warrington - in the two games I've seen them play, were pretty good though.

[Paulclem]

If I find the bloody bastard who stole my bike this evening...

Unlucky. Were you far from home?

[The Atheist]

However Athiest's intercession may be working, there is fine weather on the way (honestly). He must know a powerful Diety to vanquish the August Bank Holiday Rain Sprite, wno has held sway in these parts since time immemorial.


:Angel_anim:


Anyone for cricket ? :)

:lol:

That is truly hilarious. What will they think of next?


No, Mick, the ruddy duck's a Mandarin. I'm fattening it up, then it's destined for the old orange sauce. Parker has an excellent recipe. Best served with a decent Claret, they tell me.

Always a favourite duck & orange.

I can't the find the emoticon with the knife & fork at the ready, but I'm sure you get the picture!

[dafydd manton]

I'm starting to panic!!!!!!!!!

[jocky]

I'm starting to panic!!!!!!!!!

This is not an unusual occurrence in the Blokes Thread, but don't worry help is at hand. Take an ordinary brown paper bag and blow hard into it until your breathing is back to normal. Mrs Jocky, who has years of medical experience, assures me this will get you through till morning. After that you are on your own. :smilewinkgrin:

[Paulclem]

This is not an unusual occurrence in the Blokes Thread, but don't worry help is at hand. Take an ordinary brown paper bag and blow hard into it until your breathing is back to normal. Mrs Jocky, who has years of medical experience, assures me this will get you through till morning. After that you are on your own. :smilewinkgrin:

That's funny - Mrs Paulclem always recommended a plastic bag - over the head.

[jocky]

Since the Cold Ale Thread is clearly on the up, is it not time we had a motto? Here is my humble suggestion; " Omnes relinquite, O Vos intrantes. " :)

[jocky]

That's funny - Mrs Paulclem always recommended a plastic bag - over the head.

:)

Quite right, it is a well known fact that different bags have different remedies. Was my syntax correct? ...... I have this awful feeling that I have muddled something up. :)

[Paulclem]

:)

Quite right, it is a well known fact that different bags have different remedies. Was my syntax correct? ...... I have this awful feeling that I have muddled something up. :)

She did mumble something about it being a remedy for life, but I thought she was talking about Socrates.

Seemed crystal. What's the translation of your motto?

[The Atheist]

Since the Cold Ale Thread is clearly on the up, is it not time we had a motto? Here is my humble suggestion; " Omnes relinquite, O Vos intrantes. " :)

Just because you have that on your doorway....

:D

I think we can be a bit more positive than that.

What's wrong with the simple "Den of Iniquity"?

[jocky]

I think it was something along the lines of Beware the Dog. Look it up for yourself you lazy git. Teachers nowadays, I don't know what is the world coming to? :)

[Paulclem]

I think it was something along the lines of Beware the Dog. Look it up for yourself you lazy git. Teachers nowadays, I don't know what is the world coming to? :)

:lol:

But I'm still on holiday...:yesnod:

[jocky]

Just because you have that on your doorway....

:D

I think we can be a bit more positive than that.

What's wrong with the simple "Den of Iniquity"?

" Den of Iniquity " Sounds good to me. Inspirational, almost as good as the " Mobbled Queen ". I give up I am away to my bed, door slams. :(

[dafydd manton]

Immer Im Mist, Nur die Tiefheit Verandert Sich. or "Always in the manure - it's only the depth that varies."

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...That rain will be gone by Monday morning GMT, and then no more than 5 mm before Friday afternoon.

"5mm...Have you been firing NATO rounds into the sky?


No, Mick, the ruddy duck's a Mandarin. I'm fattening it up, then it's destined for the old orange sauce. Parker has an excellent recipe. Best served with a decent Claret, they tell me.

Here in Rockford, I've come to learn that Ruddy Squab is the local delicacy.


I think it was something along the lines of Beware the Dog.

How about "Beware the hair of the dog"


Ahh, a kind of burnt offering. Then if it doesnt stop raining we threaten to "offer" some more.:angelsad2:


Immer Im Mist, Nur die Tiefheit Verandert Sich. or "Always in the manure - it's only the depth that varies."

I’m sorry gentlemen, the Chianti is doing its job and therefore I am unable to restrain myself. All this talk of digested grass is welling up a nostalgic tear:

“… Cityslicker, I see you come for a truck load of our most prized commodity, but there is something I’ll share with you that is far more precious than Fire Frisbees”

The dung loader popped his head into the bar to let me know the chips were about ankle deep in my truck; “jes wunderin if I should keep shovelin in more BS”.

“Yes, yes; let’s keep piling it on.”

Annoyed at the interruption, the Terrier continued: “City slicker, are you familiar with Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart?...”

---------

“…Fortunately, I have never experienced the bottom of a steaming heap head first while attempting to maintain a clear perspective. I should think that one would be in want of goggles and a mask if they were to indulge themselves.
Your reference to Timbuktu made me realize that I left out roughly 200 years of detail between that glorious night on the Llano Estacado in 1541 to Salzburg Austria in 1763….”

----------

“…to his most trusted lieutenant; Miguel Cervantes. Lt. Cervantes returned to Spain in the region of S____ and gave the music to a Franciscan monk by the name of B_____ S____. BS placed the music in the sepulcher of a famous knight who hailed from the region of La Mancha…”

.

[jocky]

I have never denied being partial to a "hair of the dog" but I have never tried to swallow it whole. This is after all the Cold Ale Thread where hard working guys are allowed to let their hair down. Cervantes understood this well or there would have been no Sancho Panza. Do not misconstrue having a joke with being unread and uneducated.

[soundofmusic]

Jesus, there are a lot of people like that in the world.

Lovely!

I must say, I've always wondered why USA built their retirement state in the middle of a tropical swamp. Helps weed out the sick, I guess.


I'll have a go, but I'm struggling with some persistent rain here right now!


Has it stopped raining yet??
No kidding,
Well, everyone here who hasn't gone to the beaches are complaining of stomach problems too...I've felt dreadful the last few days..
I think that might be the idea; get us down to the tropics and then give us all those flu shots...if one doesn't knock off the elderly population, the other will.


I can confirm we have had a change in the weather, its now COLD as well as wet.

I think I'd take your cold; it's hot and wet here.


Ahhhh - a British summer. Isn't Yorkshire wonderful!

Do you guys really get rain; when I've been in Britain, I could walk a mile in your rain and my clothes were still dry?


Don't forget the wind. Wet cold and windy. Lovely August.

Last time I was in London in August it was hot as a furnace and I had an attic room, I laid on the bed most of the day next to the one window.


No, Mick, the ruddy duck's a Mandarin. I'm fattening it up, then it's destined for the old orange sauce. Parker has an excellent recipe. Best served with a decent Claret, they tell me.

Don't you dare; that is a gorgeous duck. We don't get anything that pretty in florida.


I haven't worn a suit for years, the last one I had had to be donated to a clothing charity on account of the waist size having unaccountably shrunk so as to be unwearable.

My whole wardrobe is having that problem; the only thing that I can button is the top.


If I find the bloody bastard who stole my bike this evening...

Next time get a pink bike or bright green...bad business, my sympathies...

:)

You will give him a five hundred pounds reward, as all that exercise was killing you.

Whoever claims that once a person rides a bike, they never forget has not meant me; I can't even keep the things up anymore, much less fit my bottom on the seat..


That's funny - Mrs Paulclem always recommended a plastic bag - over the head.

Has Mrs Clem suggested you finish all of the spring repairs first...has she taken to shopping at victorias secret.


Since the Cold Ale Thread is clearly on the up, is it not time we had a motto? Here is my humble suggestion; " Omnes relinquite, O Vos intrantes. " :)

I can't find the break down; please interpret...

[Emil Miller]

If I find the bloody bastard who stole my bike this evening...

I know it's no consolation, or, depending on one's political persuasion, perhaps it is, but our current Prime Minister also had his bike stolen. Now he has to go around in his Lexus; as they say, it's tough at the top.

[dafydd manton]

Sounds - you ask if we get rain. We do indeed, the only difference being that at the moment, instead of falling vertically, it comes sideways. Sometimes from two different directions.

[jocky]

The sun is shining in Scotland today......hold on......no it has just disappeared behind a muckle huge bleak black storm cloud. We should be grateful that is the first time it has been sighted up here in twenty five years. Happy days :)

[prendrelemick]

Now we have Den of Iniquity, what about a name for our brotherhood like, Cold Ale Club Knights, or CACK for short.

[Emil Miller]

Now we have Den of Iniquity, what about a name for our brotherhood like, Cold Ale Club Knights, or CACK for short.

This reminds me of the time when the London borough of Southwark set up a group called Southwark Housing Investment Team, before realising that it would have to be changed to something less embarrassing.

[The Atheist]

"5mm...Have you been firing NATO rounds into the sky?

Don't they use 9mm?

Do NATO have small weapons?


All this talk of digested grass is welling up a nostalgic tear:

Me too.

I love the smell of frshly-opened silage pit!


No kidding,
Well, everyone here who hasn't gone to the beaches are complaining of stomach problems too...I've felt dreadful the last few days..
I think that might be the idea; get us down to the tropics and then give us all those flu shots...if one doesn't knock off the elderly population, the other will.

Mind you, there must be excellent economies of scale in Florida.

Hope you're feeling better!

I'm getting Parker to chill the Kahlua to exactly 4 degrees C for you when you come right.

:D



I can't find the break down; please interpret...

Abandon hope, all ye who enter.

Jocky's translation of "beware the dog" is also accurate.


Now we have Den of Iniquity, what about a name for our brotherhood like, Cold Ale Club Knights, or CACK for short.

In the cack would be right!

:lol:

[The Atheist]

This reminds me of the time when the London borough of Southwark set up a group called Southwark Housing Investment Team, before realising that it would have to be changed to something less embarrassing.

:smilielol5:

[jocky]

Now we have Den of Iniquity, what about a name for our brotherhood like, Cold Ale Club Knights, or CACK for short.

:)

After much consultation among the Scottish membership we have decided to come down in favour of Mick's proposal, with one proviso, the majority of urban members shall not be lorded over by the minority pastoral aristocracy. You know who you are. :)

[dafydd manton]

Or. to put it another way: "We'll have none of your **** in our chambers!"

[jocky]

This reminds me of the time when the London borough of Southwark set up a group called Southwark Housing Investment Team, before realising that it would have to be changed to something less embarrassing.

:)

Yes, but common sense finally kicked in and they changed their name to Southwark Housing Investment Team Enterprise. :)

[dafydd manton]

And nobody noticed.................

[The Atheist]

Now this stuff brings back happy memories. I used to live for English assignments where I could dream up epithetic acronyms.

Most don't bear repeating in this type of open forum.

:D

[dafydd manton]

I genuinely spent some time on an Army signals Regt unit, which had a First-Aid Techinical Stores Officer, a very florid and rotund Major.....FATSO!

[The Atheist]

I have honestly interviewed a man named Wayne Kerr.

Also, Rod Stewart, Bruce Willis and several others with celebrity names.

[Emil Miller]

:)

Yes, but common sense finally kicked in and they changed their name to Southwark Housing Investment Team Enterprise. :)

Actually they changed it to OHIT. I never discovered what the 'O' stood for.

[prendrelemick]

Perhaps the O was a zero.

[Emil Miller]

I genuinely spent some time on an Army signals Regt unit, which had a First-Aid Techinical Stores Officer, a very florid and rotund Major.....FATSO!

One of my former colleagues in the MoD was sent to the Falkland Islands for six months. He said that the British radio station that broadcast to Argentina was called the Falkland Islands Broadcasting Service. The Argentinians must have had a laugh at that.

[The Atheist]

Perhaps the O was a zero.

That's very good!


... Falkland Islands for six months...

Los Malvinas! English imperialist!

Who was the radio designed for? Did it actually have an audience, or was it some kind of Lord Haw-Haw for the '80s?

Here, this'll cheer you up.

When the Falklands War was happening, I had a friend about to take the "big OE" as it's called in Kiwi-speak - an extended overseas trip - and he was going to UK/Europe first. He was a bit worried, because of the war, so I asked him why that bothered him.

He thought the Falklands were part of the Channel Islands and that the war was within an Exocet of London.

:smilielol5:

[dafydd manton]

.....and he was a Navigator!

[Paulclem]

That's very good!
Here, this'll cheer you up.

When the Falklands War was happening, I had a friend about to take the "big OE" as it's called in Kiwi-speak - an extended overseas trip - and he was going to UK/Europe first. He was a bit worried, because of the war, so I asked him why that bothered him.

He thought the Falklands were part of the Channel Islands and that the war was within an Exocet of London.

:smilielol5:

I once asked a colleague who was going on holiday to Miami if she was going to pop up to see her sister in LA, not realising that it is as vast a distance from the UK to Miami as it is from Miami to LA

I'm a smalltown boy.

[jocky]

That's very good!



Los Malvinas! English imperialist!

Who was the radio designed for? Did it actually have an audience, or was it some kind of Lord Haw-Haw for the '80s?

Here, this'll cheer you up.

When the Falklands War was happening, I had a friend about to take the "big OE" as it's called in Kiwi-speak - an extended overseas trip - and he was going to UK/Europe first. He was a bit worried, because of the war, so I asked him why that bothered him.

He thought the Falklands were part of the Channel Islands and that the war was within an Exocet of London.

:smilielol5:

The benefits of aggressive Imperialism are about to bear fruit. The waters around the Falkland Isles are heaving with black gold and it is about to be harvested. This will probably lead to another war, this time against a South American coalition bankrolled by Hugo Chaves. We could, of course, negotiate a deal and everyone is happy but history points in the other direction.

[dafydd manton]

My first Mother-in-law, who lived in a tiny village in Rutland, North Luffenham, asked me once why we didn't pop back on weekends. I was stationed in Berlin!

[Paulclem]

This is the truth - I once taught a woman in her late thirties who said that she had only gradually realised that there were other countries. We were doing animal farm, and so the references to Russia were problematic. She wasn't a stupid person either. And she passed.

[jocky]

My first Mother-in-law, who lived in a tiny village in Rutland, North Luffenham, asked me once why we didn't pop back on weekends. I was stationed in Berlin!

That brings back memories, after our last tour of the northern part of an Island located in the Atlantic we found ourselves in the haven of Catterick. It was my proud duty to inform the guys in the gymn hall that life was going to be so much easier. " After a light exercise on Friday afternoons the weekend is all yours. " I omitted to mention that they would be so knackered they would not waken up till Sunday. I am glad to find there is someone even older than me in the Blokes Thread. :)

[dafydd manton]

Oh, cheers, Jocky!! I'm a very youthful 55. Indeed, I am actually 21 with 34 years of additional experience!

[jocky]

Oh, cheers, Jocky!! I'm a very youthful 55. Indeed, I am actually 21 with 34 years of additional experience!

:)

To hell with the experience, we both wish we were 21 again.

[dafydd manton]

Ah, now to have the mind of the older man, but the body of the younger.....!

[jocky]

This is the truth - I once taught a woman in her late thirties who said that she had only gradually realised that there were other countries. We were doing animal farm, and so the references to Russia were problematic. She wasn't a stupid person either. And she passed.

Paul, if that does not get you promoted to Deputy Headmaster with the commensurate salary increase, my name is not Jocky. The powers that be only need to read your posts and your elevation is guaranteed. :)

[dafydd manton]

I have a funny feeling that our putting in a good word might be a hindrance......

[The Atheist]

I once asked a colleague who was going on holiday to Miami if she was going to pop up to see her sister in LA, not realising that it is as vast a distance from the UK to Miami as it is from Miami to LA

I'm a smalltown boy.

:lol:

At least you didn;t suggest she walked!


The benefits of aggressive Imperialism are about to bear fruit. The waters around the Falkland Isles are heaving with black gold and it is about to be harvested. This will probably lead to another war, this time against a South American coalition bankrolled by Hugo Chaves. We could, of course, negotiate a deal and everyone is happy but history points in the other direction.

Yes, I see that. Is there any ironic value in Argentina having a female in charge this time around?


This is the truth - I once taught a woman in her late thirties who said that she had only gradually realised that there were other countries. We were doing animal farm, and so the references to Russia were problematic. She wasn't a stupid person either. And she passed.

That doesn't surprise me. I once employed a 26 year old woman who had never been more than 30 km from her home suburb in her entire life. She thought Auckland was the entire country.

(it actually is, but that's another subject :D)


:)

To hell with the experience, we both wish we were 21 again.

Nah. I'd go for 28. I was a lawnmowing contractor, tanned, fit and could lift a couple of hundred kgs without breaking a sweat. Women used to stalk me.


Actually, remembering that last part, I think I'll stick with 51!

:smilielol5:


I have a funny feeling that our putting in a good word might be a hindrance......

Hindrance?

Terminal would be more like it.

Ha! What was that I was saying about famous people applying for jobs?

Beat this one!

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/omar.jpg

[prendrelemick]

I must admit, when my son was walking in New Zealand, I had every confidence I could just go there and find him if need I needed to. After all, I knew he was somewhere on the South Island. How hard could it be?

[soundofmusic]

I know it's no consolation, or, depending on one's political persuasion, perhaps it is, but our current Prime Minister also had his bike stolen. Now he has to go around in his Lexus; as they say, it's tough at the top.

I think it is rather nice of him to run around in a Lexus instead of a limo; what does the queen go about in?


Sounds - you ask if we get rain. We do indeed, the only difference being that at the moment, instead of falling vertically, it comes sideways. Sometimes from two different directions.

I guess I won't visit England during rainy season then; when is it cool and dry over there?


The sun is shining in Scotland today......hold on......no it has just disappeared behind a muckle huge bleak black storm cloud. We should be grateful that is the first time it has been sighted up here in twenty five years. Happy days :)

Or maybe I'll visit Scotland; but I hear you have to be in good condition and walk uphill alot.


Now we have Den of Iniquity, what about a name for our brotherhood like, Cold Ale Club Knights, or CACK for short.

How about Cold Ale Nights...I like the concept of telling the spouse, "I'm going to the can"


This reminds me of the time when the London borough of Southwark set up a group called Southwark Housing Investment Team, before realising that it would have to be changed to something less embarrassing.

Even better...



Mind you, there must be excellent economies of scale in Florida.

Hope you're feeling better!

I'm getting Parker to chill the Kahlua to exactly 4 degrees C for you when you come right.

:lol:

I walked into the hospital today just for a medical clearance form; just the thought of them touching me and I feel 100%; tell parker I'm ready for that Kahlua...


Or. to put it another way: "We'll have none of your **** in our chambers!"

:smash:

My first Mother-in-law, who lived in a tiny village in Rutland, North Luffenham, asked me once why we didn't pop back on weekends. I was stationed in Berlin!

:crazy: I had one of those too; Poor woman, she kept asking to see her son and he kept sending me in his place.


This is the truth - I once taught a woman in her late thirties who said that she had only gradually realised that there were other countries. We were doing animal farm, and so the references to Russia were problematic. She wasn't a stupid person either. And she passed.

Was she American; I thought we were the only ones who thought that there were no other countries in the world...

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

The Breakers Beach Club
“Come in the water. The water is fine”
The summersault layout maneuvers starting at 1:20 are superb:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NFsuDEsEaY&feature=related


.

[jocky]

The Breakers Beach Club
“Come in the water. The water is fine”
The summersault layout maneuvers starting at 1:20 are superb:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NFsuDEsEaY&feature=related


.

:)

You give a new meaning to the term fossil hunters.






Or maybe I'll visit Scotland; but I hear you have to be in good condition and walk uphill alot.












Soundo you know you are more than welcome, but I have a statistic for you. 9.2 million Americans are of Scottish descent, while only 5 million Scots remain in Scotland. Go figure. Besides, Mrs Jocky has ordered me to sweep the snow off the mountains as she says, " I am nae being embarassed in front of our American guest. " :)

[soundofmusic]

The Breakers Beach Club
“Come in the water. The water is fine”
The summersault layout maneuvers starting at 1:20 are superb:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NFsuDEsEaY&feature=related

I had forgotten what real bossoms on actresses look like! They're cute, but the Betty Boop voice has to go and they should fire the coreographer
.


Soundo you know you are more than welcome, but I have a statistic for you. 9.2 million Americans are of Scottish descent, while only 5 million Scots remain in Scotland. Go figure. Besides, Mrs Jocky has ordered me to sweep the snow off the mountains as she says, " I am nae being embarassed in front of our American guest. " :)

Thank you for the kind invite. I'm afraid you and Mrs Jocky would be embarrassed that the Scots in America can barely pull a 12 foot pine out of the ground with all this city living and beach lounging. Tell Mrs Jocky I'm not one of those hoity-toity Americans, I'm wash and wear and can sleep anywhere.:smilewinkgrin:

[prendrelemick]

From Gilliatt.
“…womanly name of “Iu-i-si-a-wih-si-wih-ti-tsa”, the [Zuni] governor called her a “bag of hard howls,” and said that she had the habit of storing up breath like a horned toad, which accounted for her extraordinary circumference, and her ability to make a noise in the world” - Frank Hamilton Cushing; Zuni ethnologist

I knew a girl like that once, she was called Sh-ar-on-Heg-gin-bo-tt-om. She went from one nomenclaturely challenged group to another when she married my mate, David Pratt.

[Emil Miller]

[QUOTE=soundofmusic;948451]The Breakers Beach Club
“Come in the water. The water is fine”
The summersault layout maneuvers starting at 1:20 are superb:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NFsu...eature=related

......they should fire the coreographer.



I hate to think what you would do to this one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjxzKZYAWvo

[The Atheist]

I must admit, when my son was walking in New Zealand, I had every confidence I could just go there and find him if need I needed to. After all, I knew he was somewhere on the South Island. How hard could it be?

:lol:

I'll just ring my mate to go and get him if need be.


I think it is rather nice of him to run around in a Lexus instead of a limo; what does the queen go about in?

Rolls Royce. Gold carriage.



I guess I won't visit England during rainy season then; when is it cool and dry over there?

March 11th.

;)



I walked into the hospital today just for a medical clearance form; just the thought of them touching me and I feel 100%; tell parker I'm ready for that Kahlua...

Excellent!

Your Kahlua's at the table and I'll bring over a couple of those really healthy, hand-made Belgian dark chocolates when I get a sec. (Freud at play? My finger the "X" first time I typed that!) :blush2:



Was she American; I thought we were the only ones who thought that there were no other countries in the world...

No worries there, ignorance is pandemic.

[Paulclem]

Just seen on the news that there's been an earthquake in NZ.

Hope things are going ok.

[OrphanPip]

I think Atheist is in Auckland, which is reasonably far from where the earthquake was, but ya, hope everything is well.

[The Atheist]

Yes indeed, a long way from us, but a large earthquake hit Christchurch this morning. 7.1 on the Richter, with early damage estimates over $2billion.

Thakfully, as it struck at 4.30 am, nobody has been killed, because the devastation and damage is unbelievable. Roads & bridges destroyed, thousands of houses either flattened or severely damaged.

Pics here:

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/image.cfm?c_id=1&gal_objectid=10671105&gallery_id=113677#7073686

[Nightshade]

I hate to sound like a twit but if houses were flattened where were the people who belong in them at 430 in the morning?? :confused:

[dafydd manton]

Just glad you're OK mate!

[prendrelemick]

My brother and his family, who live in the area are all OK. They were able to reassure us nearly straightaway because of facebook. It has been some use at last.

[The Atheist]

I hate to sound like a twit but if houses were flattened where were the people who belong in them at 430 in the morning?? :confused:

A combination of lucky escapes and most of the buildings that actually fell down were commercial buildings in the central city and therefore empty at 4.30 am.


Just glad you're OK mate!

No worries, it's volcanic eruptions we have to worry about, not earthquakes!

Auckland has had one every ~600 years for the past several hundred thousand years and the last one was 800 years ago, so we are well and truly overdue.


My brother and his family, who live in the area are all OK. They were able to reassure us nearly straightaway because of facebook. It has been some use at last.

Dead right!

I first heard about it on the internet at about 5.30, so I switched the tv and radio on... nothing.

Back to the internet - information everywhere, the best source being NZ chat pages.

[dafydd manton]

Typical TV - nobody dead, not news!

[LitNetIsGreat]

Forgot that our Atheist lives in New Zealand, glad to read that you are OK and that it is just damage, not people. Scary stuff though.

[The Atheist]

Forgot that our Atheist lives in New Zealand, glad to read that you are OK and that it is just damage, not people. Scary stuff though.

Yes, it would have been terrifying.

I've lived in lots of places that get frequent earthquakes, but about strength 5 is the worst I've felt, and that was scary. 7.1 is 100 times stronger.

Still only the two injuries, although it looks like it has scared at least one bloke to death with a fatal heart attack occuring straight after it and lots of other cardiac "events", apparently.

Just the one bloke left in ICU and they're quietly confident he'll be ok.

Injuries coming through now are from the Darwin Award-wannabes who are determined to kill themselves trying to fix damage they aren't competent to fix.

[Paulclem]

We're lucky in the UK - no vlcanoes or earthquakes of any note. We had a tornado in Birmingham a few years ago where a few streets were damaged.

We do get flooding, which is perhaps the worst event.

Facebook is good for keeping in touch. Most of it is complete ******** but it saves phoning the relatives when you can just chat and send messages.

[Nightshade]

You forget the earthquake in Lincoln a few years back too. Then there was the hurricane in October 87. Of course its technically not a hurricane but a great storm because it was in the wrong part of the world but who is quibbling?

[The Atheist]

Didn't you have quite a bit of disruption recently through a volcanic eruption? Admittedly, not a UK-based one.

The floods of 1952 spring to mind as well. Not to mention that a rise in sea level wouldn't be all that good for large parts of the country.

That's one of the things the Christchurch quake brought home - it was in an area where earthquakes were unknown. I saw the farmer interviewed whose farm was right above the epicentre.

"I never knew there were fault lines here" he said.

The picture behind him showed a huge rupture running right through his entire farm - and for several miles thereafter.

He knows now!

[OrphanPip]

We get tornadoes occasionally in Quebec, and small earthquakes in Montreal occasionally. The only major natural disaster I remember is the icestorm in '98, it caused something like 6 billion dollars in damage.

[Nightshade]

Somebody correct me , but can't fault line appear just about anywhere? I mean yes obviously there are the established ones but surley enough bashing causes new cracks forming smaller plates and more fault lines?
I am thinking f the kinderegg I was going to use to explain layers of the earth to one of my classes this year... i was even going to crack top layer and creat fault lines .. all of which I would get to eat of course.

[The Atheist]

We get tornadoes occasionally in Quebec, and small earthquakes in Montreal occasionally. The only major natural disaster I remember is the icestorm in '98, it caused something like 6 billion dollars in damage.

yes, but in a country where temperatures of -30C in the daytime is considered "normal", I think you have enough to go on with.

:D


Somebody correct me , but can't fault line appear just about anywhere?

Only the remotest possibility. Faults are only on or near the edges of the tectonic plates, so one appearing in the centre if a plate, say, would be extremely unlikely.

[Nightshade]

Remind me again how do we know where the edges are? How say do we know that the plates are one solid piece as opposed to two or three jammed together which eventualy drift loose causing 'new' fault to appear?

[The Atheist]

Remind me again how do we know where the edges are? How say do we know that the plates are one solid piece as opposed to two or three jammed together which eventualy drift loose causing 'new' fault to appear?

Seismic surveys, mostly. Geologists create small explosions and measure the movement for several kilometres from the site. This enables them to track where faults are and so far, the predictions have been correct.

Not saying it cannot happen - just very, very unlikely. An earthquake which was able to shatter a tectonic plate wouldn't be good for anyone anywhere.

[The Atheist]

And just to top things off, since the earthquake, North Island has been beset by severe storms and flooding.

The bottom half, anyway. I almost feel a bit guilty, sitting in Auckland in nice spring weather while the rest of NZ falls to bits.

But not for long!

:D

[Paulclem]

Didn't you have quite a bit of disruption recently through a volcanic eruption? Admittedly, not a UK-based one.

The floods of 1952 spring to mind as well. Not to mention that a rise in sea level wouldn't be all that good for large parts of the country.

That's one of the things the Christchurch quake brought home - it was in an area where earthquakes were unknown. I saw the farmer interviewed whose farm was right above the epicentre.

"I never knew there were fault lines here" he said.

The picture behind him showed a huge rupture running right through his entire farm - and for several miles thereafter.

He knows now!

We get flooding pretty regularly. The 1952 one claimed quite a few lives, and the smaller ones cause fatalities too, not to mention the cost for the people who can't get insurance on their houses then. I don'[t think there were many fatalities in the 1987 storm - though Sevenoaks was denuded and should have been called Oneoak.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Yes indeed, a long way from us, but a large earthquake hit Christchurch this morning. 7.1 on the Richter, with early damage estimates over $2billion.

Thakfully, as it struck at 4.30 am, nobody has been killed, because the devastation and damage is unbelievable. Roads & bridges destroyed, thousands of houses either flattened or severely damaged.



Glad to hear you and for the most part everyone is OK.

For us it is tornadoes, flash floods and at times we will have a summers with excessive deadly heat.

Keep us informed on the latest.

Gilliatt

[soundofmusic]

From Gilliatt.
“…womanly name of “Iu-i-si-a-wih-si-wih-ti-tsa”, the [Zuni] governor called her a “bag of hard howls,” and said that she had the habit of storing up breath like a horned toad, which accounted for her extraordinary circumference, and her ability to make a noise in the world” - Frank Hamilton Cushing; Zuni ethnologist

I knew a girl like that once, she was called Sh-ar-on-Heg-gin-bo-tt-om. She went from one nomenclaturely challenged group to another when she married my mate, David Pratt.

:shocked::lol:

[QUOTE=soundofmusic;948451]The Breakers Beach Club
“Come in the water. The water is fine”
The summersault layout maneuvers starting at 1:20 are superb:


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4NFsu...eature=related

......they should fire the coreographer.



I hate to think what you would do to this one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EjxzKZYAWvo

Well guys, it could be that I've fallen in Lussss...ove; but it all looks pretty romantic to me today...

:lol:

I'll just ring my mate to go and get him if need be.


Rolls Royce. Gold carriage.

March 11th.

;)
Excellent!

Your Kahlua's at the table and I'll bring over a couple of those really healthy, hand-made Belgian dark chocolates when I get a sec. (Freud at play? My finger the "X" first time I typed that!) :blush2:



No worries there, ignorance is pandemic.

Atheist, I forever find myself comparing every man I meet to you and Parker; I still haven't found any that know that I need Belgian chocoate with my Kahlua:ladysman:

Yes indeed, a long way from us, but a large earthquake hit Christchurch this morning. 7.1 on the Richter, with early damage estimates over $2billion.

Thakfully, as it struck at 4.30 am, nobody has been killed, because the devastation and damage is unbelievable. Roads & bridges destroyed, thousands of houses either flattened or severely damaged.

Pics here:

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/image.cfm?c_id=1&gal_objectid=10671105&gallery_id=113677#7073686

Glad to hear everyone is okay...I don't know what would happen to us in Florida if we had an earthquake, we grew up in the Cuban missle crisis with "Duck and cover":icon_bs:

I was thinking of Hurricane Andrew, I got one phone call during the hurricane, it was from a total stranger from England who said, "I hear you're having a bit of a blow over there..."

[jocky]

It would take more than a 7.2 magnitude earthquake to light a fire under old Atheist. Now if his fishing line was to break while struggling with a decent sized salmon, that would be a disaster! :)

[The Atheist]

It would take more than a 7.2 magnitude earthquake to light a fire under old Atheist. Now if his fishing line was to break while struggling with a decent sized salmon, that would be a disaster! :)

Damn right!

The saddest moment of my life was out game-fishing about 30 years ago.

I watched a huge fin surface next to the bait. The shark sucked in the bait and the line ran off, screaming. The skipper, who saw it as well, reckoned it was 300kg plus of mako shark.

It had bitten through the bait just behind the hook.

I was devastated.

[jocky]

Damn right!

The saddest moment of my life was out game-fishing about 30 years ago.

I watched a huge fin surface next to the bait. The shark sucked in the bait and the line ran off, screaming. The skipper, who saw it as well, reckoned it was 300kg plus of mako shark.

It had bitten through the bait just behind the hook.

I was devastated.

I have a sense of deja vu here. The skipper's name and his sworn testimony, along with a faded black and white photograph of this legendary, or should I say mythical Mako would be appreciated. Remember I have read ' The Old Man and The Sea ' at least he produced the skeleton of the Marlin, though no one saw him catch it. :)




I was thinking of Hurricane Andrew, I got one phone call during the hurricane, it was from a total stranger from England who said, "I hear you're having a bit of a blow over there..."

Good JOB he was English, if he had been Scottish it could have been misconstrued and caused a lot of adverse comment, blaming mostly me, in this dangerous thread. :)

Guys and Gal, I am desolate and need my pals. Me and Mrs Jocky have had a huge spat. It all started when I broached the subject of hiring an Au Pair. I had rehearsed all the arguments in favour, such as the kids are all up and you deserve to put your feet up. No more cooking, cleaning and washing. " Aye and I suppose she will be young, blonde, blue eyed and big busted. " The thought had crossed my mind; "You must think I came up the Clyde in a banana boat. " The argument went on in this vein for several hours until Mrs J brought it to an abrupt halt, she flashed her eyes dangerously and remarked; " Well if we are hiring an Au Pair, I am going to have me a Butler. " You canna win. :(

[soundofmusic]

Guys and Gal, I am desolate and need my pals. Me and Mrs Jocky have had a huge spat. It all started when I broached the subject of hiring an Au Pair. I had rehearsed all the arguments in favour, such as the kids are all up and you deserve to put your feet up. No more cooking, cleaning and washing. " Aye and I suppose she will be young, blonde, blue eyed and big busted. " The thought had crossed my mind; "You must think I came up the Clyde in a banana boat. " The argument went on in this vein for several hours until Mrs J brought it to an abrupt halt, she flashed her eyes dangerously and remarked; " Well if we are hiring an Au Pair, I am going to have me a Butler. " You canna win. :(

Well, we shall cry and have a drink together...doggone it, Young Romeo has left a trail of empty liquor bottles in his wake:dupe: and told me I missed my "window of opportunity with my day or two of morality"....

Parker, I think I might have a shot of rum in my Kahlua tonight....

Anyone have a song for the Jock and myself:cryin:

[The Atheist]

I have a sense of deja vu here. The skipper's name and his sworn testimony, along with a faded black and white photograph of this legendary, or should I say mythical Mako would be appreciated. Remember I have read ' The Old Man and The Sea ' at least he produced the skeleton of the Marlin, though no one saw him catch it. :)

Not even a photo, dammit. It was there and gone in seconds.

I don't even have a photo of the 108lb tiddler I won a fishing contest with.

Even worse, my brother's dog ate the jaw!

[The Atheist]

Anyone have a song for the Jock and myself:cryin:

Yep.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnzHtm1jhL4

[gbrekken]

This is now becoming my monthly drive thru/by shooting off of the mouth. I'd tell you what I was referring to but that would give you an unfair advantage wouldn't it? I'll just use quotes in making reference. The reading this month was much more interesting than previous times when my virus detector found a trojan horse on-site.

Anyone heard of the Madrid fault in the middle of the U.S.? Sand geysers and all. No loss of life in Kiwi land is a thankful thing.

Someone on site older than Jocky? God forbid.

No politics allowed, but the host (reference our parasitic nature) here in the states sells adds for even the senatorial race in NV. Adieu.

[The Atheist]

This is now becoming my monthly drive thru/by shooting off of the mouth.

You should make it weekly, or at the very least give Parker advance warning!


The reading this month was much more interesting than previous times when my virus detector found a trojan horse on-site.

Seriously?

I find that a bit odd - I come in at least daily and haven't ever seen a sign of one. Or are you referring that Saffer? A sneaky disguise if ever I saw one!


Anyone heard of the Madrid fault in the middle of the U.S.? Sand geysers and all. No loss of life in Kiwi land is a thankful thing.

Even more amazing, the Christchurch quake was slightly stronger than Haiti's one, yet the death toll of zero compares pretty favourably with haiti's 230,000.

I looked up the [New] Madrid fault - never heard of it before. Interesting stuff.



No politics allowed, but the host (reference our parasitic nature) here in the states sells adds for even the senatorial race in NV. Adieu.

That's Google, not LitNet.

[Paulclem]

How's about this chap in the US burning The Koran. Is this a Freedom of Speech too Far?

I think the media should have to answer for any problems from this. Not only is it potentially putting lives at risk, but it's polarising opinion - straight into the arms of the terrorists.

In the UK we have inciting racial or religious hatred laws. Is there nothing similar in the US?

[jocky]

Someone on site older than Jocky? God forbid.



:)

Great to hear from you Gb, even if you have come back with an insult.


How's about this chap in the US burning The Koran. Is this a Freedom of Speech too Far?

I think the media should have to answer for any problems from this. Not only is it potentially putting lives at risk, but it's polarising opinion - straight into the arms of the terrorists.

In the UK we have inciting racial or religious hatred laws. Is there nothing similar in the US?

From what I can gather the authorities can only take action once an offence has taken place. I am sure some of our American friends can enlighten us as to the legal position. If it is allowed under the Constitution I doubt if anything can be done as this is inviolable. Saturday should be an interesting day.

[The Atheist]

How's about this chap in the US burning The Koran. Is this a Freedom of Speech too Far?

No.

The people who feel upset by this need to harden up.

Islam has been perverted by people who say it ok to kill infidels. I don't see the same mullahs screaming about that, so why should anyone care what they think about someone burning a book?



I think the media should have to answer for any problems from this. Not only is it potentially putting lives at risk, but it's polarising opinion - straight into the arms of the terrorists.

I disagree. Mockery is the best medicine against extremism. As with the Danish cartoons, if the response is violent, the problem is solely with those causing the violence.


In the UK we have inciting racial or religious hatred laws. Is there nothing similar in the US?

Not that covers this, no.

Just as Americans may burn their flag and effigies of their president and have groups like the KKK, they are most welcome to burn qurans as they see fit.

Funnily enough, the main problem for the church is that they need to get a permit for a fire in the open, and they won't get it.

From my perspective, this stuff is great - both sides hate atheism, so it's nice to sit back and watch them attack each other for a change.

:D

[jocky]

No.

The people who feel upset by this need to harden up.

Islam has been perverted by people who say it ok to kill infidels. I don't see the same mullahs screaming about that, so why should anyone care what they think about someone burning a book?



I disagree. Mockery is the best medicine against extremism. As with the Danish cartoons, if the response is violent, the problem is solely with those causing the violence.



Not that covers this, no.

Just as Americans may burn their flag and effigies of their president and have groups like the KKK, they are most welcome to burn qurans as they see fit.

Funnily enough, the main problem for the church is that they need to get a permit for a fire in the open, and they won't get it.

From my perspective, this stuff is great - both sides hate atheism, so it's nice to sit back and watch them attack each other for a change.

:D

It is a difficult one Atheist, burning books is anathema to most people, yet I would happily consign the Bible, Talmud, Bhagavad Gita and all the other bronze age works of theology to the flames. As you point out it is the fundies on all sides who create the violence. Yet we are where we are and the repercussions could be horrendous. Worrying times.

[OrphanPip]

Personally, I keep a pile of Ghidean Bibles for use as kindling when it gets cold in the winter. At least, those are given out for free. I can just imagine the killing Qu'ran publishers are making right now.

[jocky]

Yep.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnzHtm1jhL4

:)

Look Soundo, they are playing our song.

[jocky]

Personally, I keep a pile of Ghidean Bibles for use as kindling when it gets cold in the winter. At least, those are given out for free. I can just imagine the killing Qu'ran publishers are making right now.

:)

Ghidean Bibles, that is top drawer Pip.

[OrphanPip]

When I first received a Gideon (looked up the spelling, haha) from a random stranger in a suit outside my high school as a teenager. I, of course, rushed home to eagerly spend my evening reading the Holy Book, only to discover it only contained the New Testament, what a gyp. I think it's a marketing ploy to try and get you to go out and buy the complete thing.

My favorite religious group is still the Raelians, with their cloning hoaxes and weird UFO village cult headquarters. They're off their rocker, but it's hard to dislike a group that just wants to hang out talking about aliens and having orgies.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ra%C3%ABlism

[jocky]

When I first received a Gideon (looked up the spelling, haha) from a random stranger in a suit outside my high school as a teenager. I, of course, rushed home to eagerly spend my evening reading the Holy Book, only to discover it only contained the New Testament, what a gyp. I think it's a marketing ploy to try and get you to go out and buy the complete thing.

My favorite religious group is still the Raelians, with their cloning hoaxes and weird UFO village cult headquarters. They're off their rocker, but it's hard to dislike a group that just wants to hang out talking about aliens and having orgies.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ra%C3%ABlism

UFO activity has been markedly on the increase in the North East of Scotland of late. We have connected as I am a Vorihon and Mrs Jocky is a Vorihoness. I think I will retire to my chambers now as there are some blue flashing lights outside my portal. :)

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

...My favorite religious group is still the Raelians, with their cloning hoaxes and weird UFO village cult headquarters. ...just wants to hang out talking about aliens and having orgies.



UFO activity has been markedly on the increase in the North East of Scotland of late. We have connected as I am a Vorihon and Mrs Jocky is a Vorihoness. I think I will retire to my chambers now as there are some blue flashing lights outside my portal.


Alien’s, UFO’s, Lights, Bigfoot…now you’re talking my language.
Remember the Marfa Lights Jocky?


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tuPpVadm1OI&feature=related

Yours truly captivated by the reflection of an alien craft that landed in Chicago:
(Yes; I’m wearing my Roswell Mystery Cover Up” T-shirt)


http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Chicago%20August%2015%202010/CloudGate03.jpg

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/ae114/tabuka1/Chicago%20August%2015%202010/CloudGate02.jpg


.

[Paulclem]

No.

The people who feel upset by this need to harden up.

Islam has been perverted by people who say it ok to kill infidels. I don't see the same mullahs screaming about that, so why should anyone care what they think about someone burning a book?



I disagree. Mockery is the best medicine against extremism. As with the Danish cartoons, if the response is violent, the problem is solely with those causing the violence.



Not that covers this, no.

Just as Americans may burn their flag and effigies of their president and have groups like the KKK, they are most welcome to burn qurans as they see fit.

Funnily enough, the main problem for the church is that they need to get a permit for a fire in the open, and they won't get it.

From my perspective, this stuff is great - both sides hate atheism, so it's nice to sit back and watch them attack each other for a change.

:D

The problem is that the people who this affects - in Afghanistan for example - don't have acces to liberal ideas, are easily polarised, however ridiculous it is to you and I, and just aren't critical in their regard of their own culture, leaders etc.

I agree that humour is the best response - for a more enlightened western society, but these are more feudal and display a distinct lack of humour about some things.

I also agree that there should be more self criticism.

Is it too serious for our relaxation area. Apologies if it is.

[The Atheist]

It is a difficult one Atheist, burning books is anathema to most people, yet I would happily consign the Bible, Talmud, Bhagavad Gita and all the other bronze age works of theology to the flames. As you point out it is the fundies on all sides who create the violence. Yet we are where we are and the repercussions could be horrendous. Worrying times.

I agree that's it's not cut and dried, but I also think that allowing ourselves to be intimidated by threats of violence as worse than any of the alternatives.

I start to add it up - the Danish cartoons, Southpark, now the quran - where does it end? The edge of the wedge seems to be half of the wedge all of a sudden.


When I first received a Gideon (looked up the spelling, haha) from a random stranger in a suit outside my high school as a teenager. I, of course, rushed home to eagerly spend my evening reading the Holy Book, only to discover it only contained the New Testament, what a gyp. I think it's a marketing ploy to try and get you to go out and buy the complete thing.

My favorite religious group is still the Raelians, with their cloning hoaxes and weird UFO village cult headquarters. They're off their rocker, but it's hard to dislike a group that just wants to hang out talking about aliens and having orgies.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ra%C3%ABlism

Same reason I like Wiccans and Rastafarians. Any group whose idea of a good time is feasting and having an orgy - or getting high and having sex - can't be all bad!

We used to have those Gideon bibles given out officially when I was in high school. I recall being horrified at the time when some of the less well-bred pupils ripped them up. I still think book burning is pretty juvenile, but I'll defend the rights of people who want to do it.


The problem is that the people who this affects - in Afghanistan for example - don't have acces to liberal ideas, are easily polarised, however ridiculous it is to you and I, and just aren't critical in their regard of their own culture, leaders etc.

I agree that humour is the best response - for a more enlightened western society, but these are more feudal and display a distinct lack of humour about some things.

I also agree that there should be more self criticism.

Is it too serious for our relaxation area. Apologies if it is.

Nah, best place to discuss this kind of absurdity is over a quiet whisky - and if anyone gets too stroppy, Parker's nephew is downstairs. You'll recognise him as the bloke doing bench-presses with 280 kg on the bar.

;)

The trouble is, now that the burning has even been mooted, nothing will make things any better anyway - much better to go ahead and get it over with. If it isn't this, it'll be something else. The reaction of some parts of America to the proposed mosque at Ground Zero is as bad as the reaction to the quran burning, as far as I can tell.

[The Atheist]

Do you lot go to other forums as well?

Quite the hot topic, this quran-burning.

[Paulclem]

No. No time for this one really.

Difficult topic book burning. As you say - it's out there already. Bugger.

[The Atheist]

How about gargoyles? Muslims appear to be offended by them as well.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/world/news/article.cfm?c_id=2&objectid=10672263

[Cat Square]

Christians too:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7cbYPgkt_w



poor gargoyles -- such a bad rap

[The Atheist]

And onto more pleasant subjects, 6 am this morning, the birds started tweeting with the very first light.

Nice!

Sorry, but my kids need the outdoors more than you lot need the sun, so get over it, it's down our way for the next six months!

I think an important goal for science and engineering is to straighten up the damned planet! This half and half stuff is just a nonsense, we ought to be able to align the planet so it sits perpendicular to the sun and we do away with this "winter".

It's not the weather - which has been its usual mild self - so much as the kids constantly coming home with some stinking, sneaky viral infection from all the diseased kids sent to school regardless of being as crook as a dog.

Soundo, you'll just have to move to NZ once we straighten 'er up - it isn't going to improve your weather. Plus, you'll probably be under water, Antarctica and Greenland will definitely melt.

[dafydd manton]

If only the water would rise....and drown Blackpool! Las Vegas with Pox!

[Paulclem]

Blackpool - I really can't understand the attraction- and I went there as a young chap. It's a glorified funfair. Skegness either. My enduring memory of both is the smell of chips. I like chips, but not the smell everywhere.

[The Atheist]

I'm hoping the lack of Mick over the past few days means the weather's picked up and he's been flat out making silage, because there can't be enough rain to be raining there as well the amount we've had here today!

39 more days and I'll be building an ark!

[jocky]

Antarctica and Greenland will definitely melt.

:)

Which will be quite sad really as this will only leave the New Zealand branch of the Bloke's Thread above water. Inform Parker to have the spare room ready, we are on our way.

[dafydd manton]

Should we order in lunch now, or when we get there? (And after Paul's earlier comment, not chips, I feel.)

[The Atheist]

Hell yeah, move over here now while there's still some land left!

Jocky - I'm getting the boys down south to resurrect the NZ distillery in your honour. About 35 years ago, someone decided it would be good to start a New Zealand distillery and make our own brand of "scotch".

You must try some!

[Tallefred]

Oh, it seems like I've come at a bad time. Any spots left on that ark?

[jocky]

Hell yeah, move over here now while there's still some land left!

Jocky - I'm getting the boys down south to resurrect the NZ distillery in your honour. About 35 years ago, someone decided it would be good to start a New Zealand distillery and make our own brand of "scotch".

You must try some!

Thank you for the kind offer Atheist but I think I will pass on the Hokonui Moonshine. I will however be packing a few of my homeland's finest single malts and a few blends. Trust me you will never want me to leave. :)

[dafydd manton]

Got any of The Laphroaig in there, Jocky? I only ask to act as bodyguard, you understand............

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

Should we order in lunch now, or when we get there? (And after Paul's earlier comment, not chips, I feel.)


Hell yeah, move over here now while there's still some land left!

Jocky - I'm getting the boys down south to resurrect the NZ distillery in your honour.


Oh, it seems like I've come at a bad time. Any spots left on that ark?


... I will however be packing a few of my homeland's finest single malts and a few blends. Trust me you will never want me to leave.


http://www.galvestonhistory.org/ElissaPhotosWeb/images/Full_sail%2C_a_calm_day_on_the_Gulf.jpg

(A shameful partial re posting)

I managed to secure Elissa for safe passage to higher ground. Aye, I still recall the day I first caressed her hull, stole glances at the supple curvature of her gunwales, marveled at her firm stern, but when she turned her bow towards me revealing those inflated jibs, my untamed desires set sail on the uncharted waters of wild abandon.

She’s now been tamed for the most part. Oh sure, she’ll creak and moan from time to time, but her barque is worse than her bite.
Jocky, you’re my first stop. The Gulf Stream is taking me north to Scotland and then I’ll work my way south from there. Elissa likes that.


Anchors Aweigh
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ch1UAXp8h8Q&feature=related


.

[dafydd manton]

Rum, whisky, whiskey, anything will do...

[prendrelemick]

Well thats the silage done. The lambs weaned. The cattle brought down from t'moor.

If I keep catching up at this rate it'll be Christmas in November.

[jocky]

Got any of The Laphroaig in there, Jocky? I only ask to act as bodyguard, you understand............

Your hired dafyyd, Mrs Jocky has been known to throw a wobbly when the bottle of Islay nectar is produced. :)



Jocky, you’re my first stop.


.

I will recognise you by your Roswell teashirt. :)

[dafydd manton]

Thanks, Jocky. Should I bring a bottle of Arran?

[The Atheist]

Oh, it seems like I've come at a bad time. Any spots left on that ark?

Always room for another couple. I'll just throw the unicorns off - stupid damn animals cost a fortune in vet's fees. Always goring each other while drinking.


Thank you for the kind offer Atheist but I think I will pass on the Hokonui Moonshine.

Haha! You've heard about it then!



I managed to secure Elissa for safe passage to higher ground.

That's what we need - a return to more peaceful, slower travel.

Have you ever been on a square-rigger? The motion, sound and feel is utterly unlike any other form of transport.


Well thats the silage done. The lambs weaned. The cattle brought down from t'moor.

If I keep catching up at this rate it'll be Christmas in November.

There you go!

Now all I need to do is figure how to stop it raining here...

[jocky]

Thanks, Jocky. Should I bring a bottle of Arran?

:)

Each to his own dafydd, I was getting worried as I had never heard of it but apparently it is a new single malt. I think perhaps you should bring the Barra as we may have to dump a few intoxicated members overboard. Now I am retiring upstairs, illuminated by my candle, to partake of my Glenmorangie. I will hear from you tomorrow but not too early. Like your style.

[dafydd manton]

Arran is a lovely light, slightly peaty malt, bit like an Islay, but not so matured. Very nice, too. Don't forget to blow out the candle, that Glenmorangie burns nicely!

[Paulclem]

Always room for another couple. I'll just throw the unicorns off - stupid damn animals cost a fortune in vet's fees. Always goring each other while drinking.



Haha! You've heard about it then!



That's what we need - a return to more peaceful, slower travel.

Have you ever been on a square-rigger? The motion, sound and feel is utterly unlike any other form of transport.



There you go!

Now all I need to do is figure how to stop it raining here...

Yiou remember the black mass you did for Mick so he could get the silage done? Well the rain's got to go somewhere.

I sounds as though it could be a jolly trip on the ocean blue - particularly with Jocky's single malts. I have no experience whatsoever, but I'm willing. Presumably the experience will be useful for The Atheist Ark too.

[The Atheist]

Yiou remember the black mass you did for Mick so he could get the silage done? Well the rain's got to go somewhere.

Good ! It's gone somewhere else again, because about an hour after I posted, the clouds blew away and it's not only fine, but absurdly warm for the time of year - presently touching 20 deg.


I sounds as though it could be a jolly trip on the ocean blue - particularly with Jocky's single malts. I have no experience whatsoever, but I'm willing. Presumably the experience will be useful for The Atheist Ark too.

Boats and booze go together in a way cars can't. You cannot be a responsible drinking driver, but if you wait until the anchor's dropped - or if you're off watch on a ship - you can responsibly whacked.

Sounds better and better!

:D

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

That's what we need - a return to more peaceful, slower travel.

Have you ever been on a square-rigger? The motion, sound and feel is utterly unlike any other form of transport.


Unfortunately not, only walked around them. I bet it is a thrill.
The largest sailboat I’ve actually sailed on was a Columbia 38. I was invited to join the crew on a two day regatta, which included sailing through the night. It was a great experience.
Other than that I’ve sailed several times on a friends Lightning.

http://www.columbia-yachts.com/c38brochure.jpg

http://cnyblogs.com/HistoricalSociety/files/2007/12/lightning.jpg



:)
...to partake of my Glenmorangie.


Arran is a lovely light, slightly peaty malt, bit like an Islay, but not so matured. Very nice, too.



Boats and booze go together in a way cars can't. You cannot be a responsible drinking driver, but if you wait until the anchor's dropped - or if you're off watch on a ship - you can responsibly whacked.

As you can see from the brochure, the Columbia has plenty of room to stow your beverage of choice.

.

[The Atheist]

Unfortunately not, only walked around them. I bet it is a thrill.

Yes, I spent a couple of days on one many moons ago.

Magic.

Probably wasn't 150 years or so ago!

[soundofmusic]

:ihih: Hey Gents, Sorry it's been so long; old women and love are a nightmarish pair....:banana::banana::incazzato: :sleep:::cold::argue::sleep::party::ladysman::auto : :iamwithstupid::nopity::bawling::nono::sad::ciappa : :dupe::toetap05: :angel::ihih:


Yep.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hnzHtm1jhL4

If that isn't a blast from the past; and a perfect description of my lif:conehead:


This is now becoming my monthly drive thru/by shooting off of the mouth. I'd tell you what I was referring to but that would give you an unfair advantage wouldn't it? I'll just use quotes in making reference. The reading this month was much more interesting than previous times when my virus detector found a trojan horse on-site.

Someone on site older than Jocky? God forbid.

No politics allowed, but the host (reference our parasitic nature) here in the states sells adds for even the senatorial race in NV. Adieu.

I think, at the moment, I am the ancient on sight. Do they have voting in Nevada...I thought everything there was decided by a coin toss; since gaming came to Florida, everything is decided by perscription drugs:party:


How's about this chap in the US burning The Koran. Is this a Freedom of Speech too Far?

I think the media should have to answer for any problems from this. Not only is it potentially putting lives at risk, but it's polarising opinion - straight into the arms of the terrorists.

In the UK we have inciting racial or religious hatred laws. Is there nothing similar in the US?

Seems like alot of folks down my way admire the crazy bugger; I personally don't like a middle aged, confused coot with a small church in the middle of nowhere claiming he is representing my belief system...

:)


[QUOTE=jocky;951802]:)

Look Soundo, they are playing our song.

I love that they are playing the song; but I'm confused as to what level to set the lights and if I should move the furniture for dancing...

I read a bit of the constitution recently; it's really vague...kind of like, "Don't ask, don't tell vague...


When I first received a Gideon (looked up the spelling, haha) from a random stranger in a suit outside my high school as a teenager. I, of course, rushed home to eagerly spend my evening reading the Holy Book, only to discover it only contained the New Testament, what a gyp. I think it's a marketing ploy to try and get you to go out and buy the complete thing.

My favorite religious group is still the Raelians, with their cloning hoaxes and weird UFO village cult headquarters. They're off their rocker, but it's hard to dislike a group that just wants to hang out talking about aliens and having orgies.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ra%C3%ABlism

Where did you say that group was; I knew there was at least one church group that I could fit in with....the only problem I have with orgies is that it's kind of equal rights; even the ugly people get a girl:troll:

[The Atheist]

:ihih: Hey Gents, Sorry it's been so long; old women and love are a nightmarish pair....

Hang on a second.

Are you trying to tell us something here? If so, spill, woman!

[jocky]

:)

Thank goodness Soundos back. Now we have someone to swab the decks, pour the refreshments and repel all boarders. I guess that will be me that gets the black spot. Ha har Jim lad.

[The Atheist]

I guess that will be me that gets the black spot. Ha har Jim lad.

Black spot?

Ball, surely?

[dafydd manton]

Is this an illness I kow nothing about? What causes it? What is the cure? Other than a bath, that is! That Stockholm Tar gets everywhere!

[Emil Miller]

Now here is a conundrum. Today I went to the dentist and had root canal treatment by a young lady from Latin America. Earlier, I had noticed an article on the MSN page with a a picture of one, Penelope Cruz, whoever she may be, and the dentist could be her double. The question is this, should I ignore the voluptuous dentist and lie back and think of England, or should I enjoy, what would otherwise be an unfortunate necessity?

[dafydd manton]

If you can lie back and think of England whilst somebody is carrying out mining operations on your gums, you are a better man than I am, Gunga Din.

[Paulclem]

Did you know that if you stick you tongue into the cavity left by a just pulled tooth you can feel the bone underneath? I tried it quite a while ago and it surprised me. I wouldn't recommend t though - infections and all that.

I once had a filling - quite a large one that looked like a small ingot - come out once. I was working in a primary school and said to one of the female staff - "Just feel the weight of that little bit of metal." "Oooh yeah", "She says, "Where's it from". The horror look and jump reflex was comical when I told her.

Teeth - the fun side.

[soundofmusic]

Alien’s, UFO’s, Lights, Bigfoot…now you’re talking my language.
Remember the Marfa Lights Jocky?

Yours truly captivated by the reflection of an alien craft that landed in Chicago:
(Yes; I’m wearing my Roswell Mystery Cover Up” T-shirt)
.

Talking of Bigfoot, did I ever tell you that the first Mr sounds wore a size 13 steel toed boot...


I agree that's it's not cut and dried, but I also think that allowing ourselves to be intimidated by threats of violence as worse than any of the alternatives.

I start to add it up - the Danish cartoons, Southpark, now the quran - where does it end? The edge of the wedge seems to be half of the wedge all of a sudden.



Did someone say Southpark; God, I miss Southpark:bawling: It was never quite the same after chef left, though...Like family guy, every American cartoon needs at least one etnic:icon_bs:

Do you lot go to other forums as well?

Quite the hot topic, this quran-burning.

:mad: I'll be glad when they go back to discussing American Idol; particularly since the people I know can't stay on one side of the fence from week to week.

Christians too:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=t7cbYPgkt_w

poor gargoyles -- such a bad rap

Hello and welcome, Cat...how'd you come up with the name:shocked:

And onto more pleasant subjects, 6 am this morning, the birds started tweeting with the very first light.

Nice!

Sorry, but my kids need the outdoors more than you lot need the sun, so get over it, it's down our way for the next six months!

I think an important goal for science and engineering is to straighten up the damned planet! This half and half stuff is just a nonsense, we ought to be able to align the planet so it sits perpendicular to the sun and we do away with this "winter".


Soundo, you'll just have to move to NZ once we straighten 'er up - it isn't going to improve your weather. Plus, you'll probably be under water, Antarctica and Greenland will definitely melt.


I'm coming as soon as I can sell this bit of slum I live in as beach front property; I waded home with water to my ankles after a short burst of rain the other night...won't be long now:party:

If only the water would rise....and drown Blackpool! Las Vegas with Pox!

Maybe that is why we are getting floods...I knew there would be a pox on Florida when we legalized gambling:eek6:

:)

Which will be quite sad really as this will only leave the New Zealand branch of the Bloke's Thread above water. Inform Parker to have the spare room ready, we are on our way.

Do you mind if you and Mrs Jocky take the top bunk; I tend to roll out of bed.


Should we order in lunch now, or when we get there? (And after Paul's earlier comment, not chips, I feel.)

Atheist always knows how to feed us and Parker keeps our hinges well oiled with liquor; I'm beginning to consider letting the shack go for taxes..

Oh, it seems like I've come at a bad time. Any spots left on that ark?
Welcome, I'll give you my spot if you don't mind me perching on your shoulders with my looking glasses..

Well thats the silage done. The lambs weaned. The cattle brought down from t'moor.

If I keep catching up at this rate it'll be Christmas in November.

Just in time for you to send my a nice wool sweater...in the event we do have a winter in the South.


Hang on a second.

Are you trying to tell us something here? If so, spill, woman!

:party: Oh yes, this old lady is keeping late hours and having to take extra vitamins...our cup runneth over :ihih:

:)

Thank goodness Soundos back. Now we have someone to swab the decks, pour the refreshments and repel all boarders. I guess that will be me that gets the black spot. Ha har Jim lad.

Thank you kindly, Jocky. I think Mrs Jocky is taking over head of housekeeping though; I shall be in charge of supplying staff uniforms. Parker wants to know if he can wear those tiny bicylcle shorts he got as a "best customer" gift from victorias secret.


Now here is a conundrum. Today I went to the dentist and had root canal treatment by a young lady from Latin America. Earlier, I had noticed an article on the MSN page with a a picture of one, Penelope Cruz, whoever she may be, and the dentist could be her double. The question is this, should I ignore the voluptuous dentist and lie back and think of England, or should I enjoy, what would otherwise be an unfortunate necessity?

Forget England, my friend. Ask for the gas and keep looking south:ihih:

[The Atheist]

Now here is a conundrum. Today I went to the dentist and had root canal treatment by a young lady from Latin America. Earlier, I had noticed an article on the MSN page with a a picture of one, Penelope Cruz, whoever she may be, and the dentist could be her double. The question is this, should I ignore the voluptuous dentist and lie back and think of England, or should I enjoy, what would otherwise be an unfortunate necessity?

I'd advocate going to the next visit wearing a kilt.

Works for women, allegedly...


:party: Oh yes, this old lady is keeping late hours and having to take extra vitamins...our cup runneth over :ihih:

Woohoo!

That must be another excuse to break out the bubbly.

As if we need one...

:party:

[jocky]

Now here is a conundrum. Today I went to the dentist and had root canal treatment by a young lady from Latin America. Earlier, I had noticed an article on the MSN page with a a picture of one, Penelope Cruz, whoever she may be, and the dentist could be her double. The question is this, should I ignore the voluptuous dentist and lie back and think of England, or should I enjoy, what would otherwise be an unfortunate necessity?

Just think yourself lucky Brian you are not going for a vasectomy, as you would be praying the nurse looked like Boris Karlof.


Parker wants to know if he can wear those tiny bicylcle shorts he got as a "best customer" gift from victorias secret.


:D

Shush, If Master Atheist finds out that his missus bought them for Parker, on his credit card, there will be big trouble in Aukland.

[Paulclem]

Just think yourself lucky Brian you are not going for a vasectomy, as you would be praying the nurse looked like Boris Karlof.

:D

Especially during the shaving.

[jocky]

:D

Especially during the shaving.

Have you not got essays to mark or forms to fill in ? Think on lad, the public service cull is coming shortly. Teachers with time to burn could be supernumary. :)

[The Atheist]

Just think yourself lucky Brian you are not going for a vasectomy, as you would be praying the nurse looked like Boris Karlof.

Did I mention that the vasectomy nurse when I had mine chopped was an amazingly gorgeous blonde?

That was a little odd, I have to say.


:D

Shush, If Master Atheist finds out that his missus bought them for Parker, on his credit card, there will be big trouble in Aukland.

Parker? Bike shorts?

Never!

[jocky]

:D

Especially during the shaving.


Did I mention that the vasectomy nurse when I had mine chopped was an amazingly gorgeous blonde?

That was a little odd, I have to say.





:D

I bet you didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I hope you closed your eyes and envisioned the All Blacks front row. Better than any anaesthetic. Either that or Mick shovelling the silage. :)

[The Atheist]

:D

I bet you didn't know whether to laugh or cry. I hope you closed your eyes and envisioned the All Blacks front row. Better than any anaesthetic. Either that or Mick shovelling the silage. :)

Looking at the pieces of equipment laid out to work on me with obviated any need to think about the ABs!

[jocky]

The Pope is paying a visitation to Scotland, " The Special Daughter of the See of Rome. " Mrs Jocky has been counting her rosary beads and saying her hail Mary's. Every time the word sinner is mentioned she flashes her eyes in my direction. On that note I will retire to my confessional. Any thoughts ? :)

[Emil Miller]

If you can lie back and think of England whilst somebody is carrying out mining operations on your gums, you are a better man than I am, Gunga Din.

It wasn't a problem as the nerve was already dead and she was able to do it without anaesthetic. For my next appointment I am looking to purchase a sombrero, a poncho and a pair of maracas.

[The Atheist]

The Pope is paying a visitation to Scotland, " The Special Daughter of the See of Rome. " Mrs Jocky has been counting her rosary beads and saying her hail Mary's. Every time the word sinner is mentioned she flashes her eyes in my direction. On that note I will retire to my confessional. Any thoughts ? :)

Quite a few!

I won't mention too many of them, but the one conversation I would like to share over a bottle of consecrated wine is asking Ratty what Jesus would have done had he been ordered to join the Hitler Youth.

:D

[dafydd manton]

Nice One, The Atheist!!!

[Paulclem]

Have you not got essays to mark or forms to fill in ? Think on lad, the public service cull is coming shortly. Teachers with time to burn could be supernumary. :)

Aye - they'll be shaving 20% or more. The least we can hope for is a pay freeze. Birmingham council is looking to renegotiate public sector contracts and have the employees re-apply for their old jobs. Perhaps that'll be us too. No more golden decade for me either. I wonder if it'll be a dingy sunset. :D


Looking at the pieces of equipment laid out to work on me with obviated any need to think about the ABs!

The first injection into my right hand jewel killed whatever atmosphere there was.

That and the sound of someone screaming with laughter out in the waiting room where my wife was... She's worked in the clinic before...

[jocky]

Quite a few!

I won't mention too many of them, but the one conversation I would like to share over a bottle of consecrated wine is asking Ratty what Jesus would have done had he been ordered to join the Hitler Youth.

:D

:yikes:

His Holiness Pope Ratzinger ( Ratty ) :) would have gazed at you through his watery eyes and thoughtfully replied ; " Ach Von Atheist, our glorious Fuhrer would never have employed a Jew. " He would have then turned to his Swiss Guard and said ; " Escort our Kiwi friend from our presense ". The Captain would have whispered in the Pontiff's ear...... " The Roberto Calvi treatment ". ...... "Jahowl, and God's blood remove that rubbish wine and replace it with the Liebfraumilch. " :)

[jocky]

Aye - they'll be shaving 20% or more. The least we can hope for is a pay freeze. Birmingham council is looking to renegotiate public sector contracts and have the employees re-apply for their old jobs. Perhaps that'll be us too. No more golden decade for me either. I wonder if it'll be a dingy sunset. :D


:)

Personally Paul, I would go for the pay freeze. " dingy sunset" sounds all too familiar .

[The Atheist]

Aye - they'll be shaving 20% or more. The least we can hope for is a pay freeze. Birmingham council is looking to renegotiate public sector contracts and have the employees re-apply for their old jobs. Perhaps that'll be us too. No more golden decade for me either. I wonder if it'll be a dingy sunset. :D

I was reading the Independent this morning and studying the unemployment figures for Europe with shock. Spain at 20% is just aking for trouble, and with gov'ts all over the place undertaking "austerity" cuts, it's going to get a lot worse before it gets better.



The first injection into my right hand jewel killed whatever atmosphere there was.

That and the sound of someone screaming with laughter out in the waiting room where my wife was... She's worked in the clinic before...

I was smart enough to leave the Mrs at home.


:yikes:

His Holiness Pope Ratzinger ( Ratty ) :) would have gazed at you through his watery eyes and thoughtfully replied ; " Ach Von Atheist, our glorious Fuhrer would never have employed a Jew. " He would have then turned to his Swiss Guard and said ; " Escort our Kiwi friend from our presense ". The Captain would have whispered in the Pontiff's ear...... " The Roberto Calvi treatment ". ...... "Jahowl, and God's blood remove that rubbish wine and replace it with the Liebfraumilch. " :)

How about this gem spotted in UK today:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/ratz33.jpg

:smilielol5:

[soundofmusic]

I'd advocate going to the next visit wearing a kilt.

Works for women, allegedly...

Woohoo!

That must be another excuse to break out the bubbly.

As if we need one...

:party:

I don't know about the kilt, Brian; I recall the days before they draped the patient in long plastic bibs. I was wearing my favorite blouse and my bosoms were spilling out in a fetching, but proper manner...at the end of the treatment, my mouth hurt way before it should and we both realized that he had given me a root canal on a perfectly good tooth...1 tooth away from the sick one.

Here, Here, any reason is a good one for the bubbly...

Ah, fellows, just wanted to ask a question...I and loverboy are having a bit of a disagreement about the male anatomy and physiology. My friend claims that mens parts naturally rise and follow women during a comatose sleep; I told my friend that I am relatively sure that nocturnal emissions do not include a full blown laser and fireworks show:smilielol5:




Shush, If Master Atheist finds out that his missus bought them for Parker, on his credit card, there will be big trouble in Aukland.

Mrs A just bought the matching bow and boots:drool5:

:D

Especially during the shaving.

Hum, really, I would have thought that the mast would fall at the sign of a razor blade:yikes:

Did I mention that the vasectomy nurse when I had mine chopped was an amazingly gorgeous blonde?

That was a little odd, I have to say.

Parker? Bike shorts?

Never!

What a time to have a gorgeous blonde around; how long before you could form a proper fantasy about her?

Yes, the bicycle shorts were supposed to be for that Queen video; Parker arrived and found that they weren't using the shorts to ride afterall:hand:



How about this gem spotted in UK today:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/ratz33.jpg

:smilielol5:

:smilielol5:

[Emil Miller]

:yikes:

His Holiness Pope Ratzinger ( Ratty ) :) would have gazed at you through his watery eyes and thoughtfully replied ; " Ach Von Atheist, our glorious Fuhrer would never have employed a Jew. " He would have then turned to his Swiss Guard and said ; " Escort our Kiwi friend from our presense ". The Captain would have whispered in the Pontiff's ear...... " The Roberto Calvi treatment ". ...... "Jahowl, and God's blood remove that rubbish wine and replace it with the Liebfraumilch. " :)

Roberto Calvi treatment? Could anyone imagine the Atheist hanging from Blackfriars Bridge with five bricks in his pockets ? Don't all answer at once.:D

[jocky]

Ah, fellows, just wanted to ask a question...I and loverboy are having a bit of a disagreement about the male anatomy and physiology. My friend claims that mens parts naturally rise and follow women during a comatose sleep; I told my friend that I am relatively sure that nocturnal emissions do not include a full blown laser and fireworks show:smilielol5:






:smilielol5:

This loverboy would not happen to be a certain Yorkshire farmer who has been posted missing recently. I am suspicious. You keep him well away from your vegetable patch. :lol:


Roberto Calvi treatment? Could anyone imagine the Atheist hanging from Blackfriars Bridge with five bricks in his pockets ? Don't all answer at once.:D

Categorically no, apart from the members of every religious organisation on the planet. :lol:

[The Atheist]

Two days without a post!

Parker was almost in tears. There he was with filet de boeuf en croute with the 1959 Burgundy and nobody came to dinner.

(It's not all bad news, the beef makes great sandwiches!)

[dafydd manton]

Atheist, my dear old thing, the invitation must have got lost in the post. Rather partial to boeuf en croute, with carrots Vichysoisse and satueed potatoes. I hope the Burgundy wasn't a Remoissonel Clos de Vougeot, or I shall be devastated. Please pass on my abject apologies to Parker, assuming he's come round yet.

[Emil Miller]

Two days without a post!

Parker was almost in tears. There he was with filet de boeuf en croute with the 1959 Burgundy and nobody came to dinner.

(It's not all bad news, the beef makes great sandwiches!)

Surely Parker would never make the mistake of serving Burgundy with beef, unless he's been at the Newcastle Brown ale again. Prendrelemick has a lot to answer for.

[dafydd manton]

Terribly middle-class prejudice, that, Brian. Remember, Parker knows best (although I've never been so sure about those fish-fingers he brought in once. Frozen peas? Is this acceptable?)

[Emil Miller]

Terribly middle-class prejudice, that, Brian. Remember, Parker knows best (although I've never been so sure about those fish-fingers he brought in once. Frozen peas? Is this acceptable?)

Daffyd old chap, I'm sure that Parker knows much more about wine than I do but the pernicious effects of 'Newkie' on a refined sensibility such a his, cannot be underestimated. Frozen peas, as with all peas, are acceptable when eaten from a knife.:lol:

[dafydd manton]

One assumes, with honey?

[Emil Miller]

One assumes, with honey?

Yes, but only if it's Mankusa honey which retails at Harrods at £42 for a jar of 120 grammes. i understand that it is favoured by Sienna Miller among other non entities, so it might be quite good; best ask Parker I think.

[dafydd manton]

Oh, our local health-food shops bungs it out at £4.99 the jar.....

[The Atheist]

Atheist, my dear old thing, the invitation must have got lost in the post. Rather partial to boeuf en croute, with carrots Vichysoisse and satueed potatoes. I hope the Burgundy wasn't a Remoissonel Clos de Vougeot, or I shall be devastated. Please pass on my abject apologies to Parker, assuming he's come round yet.

He's fine; planning this week's dinner - Baron of beef with roast baby potatoes, Yorkshire pudding & brocollini.


Surely Parker would never make the mistake of serving Burgundy with beef, unless he's been at the Newcastle Brown ale again. Prendrelemick has a lot to answer for.

Nothing wrong with burgundy and boeuf. They go together like champagne & dark ale.

[prendrelemick]

Just back from Hols. After four days shopping, in Kendal (shoes) Keswick (A new top) Windermere (plate rack for draining board)and Lancaster (nothing, but we had lunch:rolleyes5:) I eventually persuaded Mrs P to go for a lesurely walk among the fells and lakes of Cumbria. It was after all the reason (I thought) we had chosen to head Northwest in the first place.
The day dawned bright and clear and we actually managed one and a half miles above Hawes water before being forced back by a chilly breeze. Coincidentally Mrs P had spotted The Hawes Water Hotel a few minutes before this ill wind struck, so we had a refuge from the storm. The rest of the afternoon was spent in the Hotel lounge sipping expensive tea and listening to Mrs P saying, "This is nice," every 10 minutes or so. After that it rained every day.:(

[dafydd manton]

No butterfly buns, Mick? (And it has to be cheaper than Betty's in York!)

[prendrelemick]

Carrot Cake! 7 (seven!) quid a head.

[Paulclem]

Just back from Hols. After four days shopping, in Kendal (shoes) Keswick (A new top) Windermere (plate rack for draining board)and Lancaster (nothing, but we had lunch:rolleyes5:) I eventually persuaded Mrs P to go for a lesurely walk among the fells and lakes of Cumbria. It was after all the reason (I thought) we had chosen to head Northwest in the first place.
The day dawned bright and clear and we actually managed one and a half miles above Hawes water before being forced back by a chilly breeze. Coincidentally Mrs P had spotted The Hawes Water Hotel a few minutes before this ill wind struck, so we had a refuge from the storm. The rest of the afternoon was spent in the Hotel lounge sipping expensive tea and listening to Mrs P saying, "This is nice," every 10 minutes or so. After that it rained every day.:(

Shopping is the primary purpose of holidays apparently. I used to think the primary purpose was relaxing fun. My views have since modified themselves to the actual reality.

[dafydd manton]

Ah, the joys of going on to a million souvenir shops, in Rhyl, and looking at little models of London buses, asinine looking dolphins, dolls made in Hong Kong (sure, it says China....bit we all know) and other tat that you can buy in every other souvenir shop from Lands End to John 'o Groats. And that's the GOOD side of Rhyl!

[prendrelemick]

Rhyl, That'd be the Welsh Morecome then?

[dafydd manton]

No, Morecambe is at least fairly clean, and not full of Scouse accents. (Actually, they've done Morecambe up a bit, its now a great place to go and die, a bit like Bournemouth. Full of people saying "I didn't feel very well, so we moved here. Pass the tablets, dear.)

Rhyl has to be only place I know where to get from the hideous caravan parks to the beach, you have to cross the main road and the main railway line!

[Paulclem]

We once took the lad - when he was three or four on a coach to Rhyl. There was a traffic jam going there - not sure why - and then we arrived. We'd just landed on the beach and it began to rain and rained all day. The sun came out as we traversed the hills into England. We spent the afternoon looking round - yes you guessed it - the shops - which tended to be pound shop style. The greasy spoons were cheap - which is good because we spent a good while in them.

[Emil Miller]

No, Morecambe is at least fairly clean, and not full of Scouse accents. (Actually, they've done Morecambe up a bit, its now a great place to go and die, a bit like Bournemouth. Full of people saying "I didn't feel very well, so we moved here. Pass the tablets, dear.)


Ah! Bournemouth, definitely a place to be missed. A few years ago I spent a weekend there with a young lady of my acquaintance and everything appeared to be fine, the hotel was good, the weather was perfect and the beach very long with real sand. And then, after walking around for ages, it dawned on me that there were no pubs there. Eventually we found one; a Wetherspoons that was choc full of people who were obviously also visitors from outside of town. My friend wasn't at all concerned because, being Chinese, she didn't drink anyway but, although the pub was a life saver, I swore never to return to Bournemouth again. There's only so much a chap can take.

[dafydd manton]

I'm not sure which is worse - the thought of Bournemouth or a Wetherspoons. A combination of the two, well....... One assumes the relationship was doomed!

[Emil Miller]

I'm not sure which is worse - the thought of Bournemouth or a Wetherspoons. A combination of the two, well....... One assumes the relationship was doomed!

I'm afraid so, she eventually departed for New York. It's an unfortunate trait of oriental women that they usually refuse to drink alcohol and I always feel distinctly uncomfortable watching anyone drinking soft drinks in a bar. The only one that I have met that did drink beer was born in Australia; so nothing surprising there. I have a lunch date on Thursday with a Japanese female who is also teetotal. It's enough to drive one to drink.

[dafydd manton]

yeah, but it's cheaper! Uncomfortable, I suspect. Next time we go for a drink, I promise to drink pints - of brandy!

[Emil Miller]

yeah, but it's cheaper! Uncomfortable, I suspect. Next time we go for a drink, I promise to drink pints - of brandy!

Now you're talking.

[dafydd manton]

Asbach Uralt, naturally. None of your cheap French muck!

[Emil Miller]

Asbach Uralt, naturally. None of your cheap French muck!

Reminds me of many happy days in Germany where the big thing among my friends was, I dare to say it, Asbach with Coca Cola accompanied by much smoking of HB cigarettes; I should point out that we were all very much younger in those days.

[dafydd manton]

HB! You're brave! And it is sacrilege putting Coke in Asbach - and far too expensive, as well! What were you doing in Germany?

[Emil Miller]

HB! You're brave! And it is sacrilege putting Coke in Asbach - and far too expensive, as well! What were you doing in Germany?

Working in a steel works and learning the language.

[dafydd manton]

Echt? Wunderbar! Sie ist eine herrlich Sprache!

[Emil Miller]

Ich würde sagen, dass Deutsch ist eher eine interessante Sprache als eine herrliche. Es gibt wenig Gelegenheit Deutsch zu sprechen in England, obwohl praktisch alle Sprachen der Welt sind hier zu hören in diesen Tagen.

[dafydd manton]

Oh, I loved German - worked in it for five years, lived amongst the locals, went to local shops, local pubs. Had a whale of a time - Berlin, too, which helps. I went to Berlin twice, once for a year, once for five, theree years in Celle, near Hanover, and one year on a roving commission, centred on Dannenberg. All booze tax free, too!!! What a life!

[Scheherazade]

Just back from Hols. After four days shopping, in Kendal (shoes) Keswick (A new top) Windermere (plate rack for draining board)and Lancaster (nothing, but we had lunch:rolleyes5:) I eventually persuaded Mrs P to go for a lesurely walk among the fells and lakes of Cumbria. It was after all the reason (I thought) we had chosen to head Northwest in the first place.
The day dawned bright and clear and we actually managed one and a half miles above Hawes water before being forced back by a chilly breeze. Coincidentally Mrs P had spotted The Hawes Water Hotel a few minutes before this ill wind struck, so we had a refuge from the storm. The rest of the afternoon was spent in the Hotel lounge sipping expensive tea and listening to Mrs P saying, "This is nice," every 10 minutes or so. After that it rained every day.:(
Shopping is the primary purpose of holidays apparently. I used to think the primary purpose was relaxing fun. My views have since modified themselves to the actual reality.
Ah, the joys of going on to a million souvenir shops, in Rhyl, and looking at little models of London buses, asinine looking dolphins, dolls made in Hong Kong (sure, it says China....bit we all know) and other tat that you can buy in every other souvenir shop from Lands End to John 'o Groats. And that's the GOOD side of Rhyl!I think I would like Mrs P, Mrs Clem and Mrs Manton (and better halves of the other members of this club) to join LitNet!

[dafydd manton]

Do you really think we would even be so daft as to admit to it's very existence? This is our haven, our oasis, our sanity in a lunatic world!!!!!!

[Paulclem]

I'm not sure which is worse - the thought of Bournemouth or a Wetherspoons. A combination of the two, well....... One assumes the relationship was doomed!

I can answer that - the Wetherspoons in Nuneaton. Now I'm not a soft lad but I baulked at entering ...

Having said that, the Wetherspoons in Coventry offers coffee from 7am and does a cheap breakfast.

I find that quite civilised, though I haven't partaken yet.

[dafydd manton]

The Wetherspoons near me is horriific - the Giro Jet Set, in Designer this that and the other, and tarty women with everything hanging out, tattoes and bottle blonde hair like drying straw. I went in once, left quickly and haven't been back. Dante couldn't have imagined it!

[Paulclem]

I know what you mean. The one in Coventry is like that from the afternoon onwards too. It's right in the centre of town as well.

Just slipped the old avatar on again. Feels better.

[dafydd manton]

Wot? No Watney's Red Barrel? (Now there was a horrific brew.)

[Emil Miller]

Oh, I loved German - worked in it for five years, lived amongst the locals, went to local shops, local pubs. Had a whale of a time - Berlin, too, which helps. I went to Berlin twice, once for a year, once for five, theree years in Celle, near Hanover, and one year on a roving commission, centred on Dannenberg. All booze tax free, too!!! What a life!

Germany is my second home, I first went there expecting to find it full of the ridiculously propagandist view propagated by UK governments, only to discover that my own people were either dupes or liars. While the 'Oh so liberal' UK sank beneath the weight of its own political and philosophical inconsistencies, Germany continued to rise to become the mighty industrial driving force for the whole of Europe. They are much more my kind of people than the English with their casuistic self-righteousness which continues to reduce them to the status of a third world country. Or to put it another way, es lebt Deutschland !

[dafydd manton]

Bingo! I'd go back tomorrow, if I could!! I loved the lack of class distinctions, so long as you didn't sit uninvited at the Stammtisch! And the determination to enjoy life!

[Paulclem]

We like Germany too, and find the people very nice. My wife speaks German, and does all the enquiring. I agree with you Brian about some of the English attitudes to "abroad". It's embarassing - particularly the attitude to Germany promulgated solely by the daft press we have.

[dafydd manton]

One reason why I flatly refuse to buy a tabloid newspaper, especially anywhere near a football tournament. Not, actually, that much of a sacrifice, since I loathe football, but there's no point in having a principle if you're not going to get sniffy about it!

[The Atheist]

Carrot Cake! 7 (seven!) quid a head.

The world's best carrot cake is made by the mum of the bloke who runs a public 9-hole golf course in Papakura.

Monstrous pieces with icing half an inch thick.

Better than sex.

(and a lot cheaper at $2 a slice)


Shopping is the primary purpose of holidays apparently. I used to think the primary purpose was relaxing fun. My views have since modified themselves to the actual reality.

Ah, music to my ears. I knew I married a shopophobe for a reason.


We like Germany too, and find the people very nice. My wife speaks German, and does all the enquiring. I agree with you Brian about some of the English attitudes to "abroad". It's embarassing - particularly the attitude to Germany promulgated solely by the daft press we have.

Don't mention the war!

Germans are just a little stereotypical, though. Just too easy.

[prendrelemick]

To be fair, the carrot cake was probably among the top ten best things I have ever placed in in my mouth. It was home made and delicious, but I wanted to be wandering lonely as a cloud upon the high places at the time, not sat among chintz.


I think Brian is being a little Harsh on us Brits EXCEPT the tabloid press, which is a national disgrace. (I too won't buy a newspaper) It is the rottenness at the heart of our society.

[Emil Miller]

To be fair, the carrot cake was probably among the top ten best things I have ever placed in in my mouth. It was home made and delicious, but I wanted to be wandering lonely as a cloud upon the high places at the time, not sat among chintz.

I think Brian is being a little Harsh on us Brits EXCEPT the tabloid press, which is a national disgrace. (I too won't buy a newspaper) It is the rottenness at the heart of our society.

Perhaps you should have tried cannabis cake instead.

Got to agree about the tabloid press, which is why I read the Daily Telegraph, although not on a regular basis.

[Paulclem]

The tabloid press - a law unto itself - courted by spineless politicians because it has so much sway - which feeds off the critical ignorence of a lot of the public, but which pretends to champion them and is actually a tool for owners who are not of them - which as no regard for the damage it does to individuals - which mercilessly promotes with the carrot of celebrity before dumping and trashing a series of hapless narcissists - which has no interest in truth, integrity or decency whilst pretending that it really is the standard bearer for those qualities - which masquerades gossip and triviality as news whilst the real stories go unnoticed - which employs bigoted loudmouths who then leave to become respectable -

I have issues with the tabloid press which is why I don't buy any. I'll sign up for therapy tomorrow...

[jocky]

The tabloid press - a law unto itself - courted by spineless politicians because it has so much sway - which feeds off the critical ignorence of a lot of the public, but which pretends to champion them and is actually a tool for owners who are not of them - which as no regard for the damage it does to individuals - which mercilessly promotes with the carrot of celebrity before dumping and trashing a series of hapless narcissists - which has no interest in truth, integrity or decency whilst pretending that it really is the standard bearer for those qualities - which masquerades gossip and triviality as news whilst the real stories go unnoticed - which employs bigoted loudmouths who then leave to become respectable -

I have issues with the tabloid press which is why I don't buy any. I'll sign up for therapy tomorrow...

:lol:

There is nothing to beat a good rant, I have been known to have one or two myself. I hate the News of the World as well but this leaves me in a moral dilemma. Is the Sporting Post a broadsheet or a tabloid ? As to the German problem, I have always thought that bullying was a group activity perfected by the herring folks. Apparently intellectuals practice this as well. I have always preferred to plough my own furrow. :chillpill:

[The Atheist]

A story to strike fear into every sheep-farmer's heart.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10674846

This storm will be nearly as devastating in dollar terms as the earthquake in the end.

I'm just waiting until someone reads the Jonah story and decides to throw me overboard!

[jocky]

A story to strike fear into every sheep-farmer's heart.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10674846

This storm will be nearly as devastating in dollar terms as the earthquake in the end.

I'm just waiting until someone reads the Jonah story and decides to throw me overboard!

You seem to be having a wee weather problem, earthquakes, storms the size of Australia, ad infinitum. The Arc idea seems to be beached. Gilliatt has cancelled the sloop and the general concencus appears to be you are on your own mate. Phone us when the sun re-appears. Your faithful pal Jocky. :)

[The Atheist]

You seem to be having a wee weather problem, earthquakes, storms the size of Australia, ad infinitum. The Arc idea seems to be beached. Gilliatt has cancelled the sloop and the general concencus appears to be you are on your own mate. Phone us when the sun re-appears. Your faithful pal Jocky. :)

Thanks very much for your support!

We're having more wind here than I get after three vindaloos in a row.

Trees across roads, old ladies across paddocks...

Classic storm-related comment:

"People are more resilient down here," the Southern Communication spokesperson said. "Not like Aucklanders. When a deck chair blows over we don't call the fire brigade."

[Paulclem]

Thanks very much for your support!

We're having more wind here than I get after three vindaloos in a row.

Trees across roads, old ladies across paddocks...

Classic storm-related comment:

"People are more resilient down here," the Southern Communication spokesperson said. "Not like Aucklanders. When a deck chair blows over we don't call the fire brigade."

:lol:

It's inverted here in the UK. The Northern term is soft southern ********. I don't know whether it's fair though.

We don't hear anything about your end of the world here - or anywhere exept the USA for that matter.

[The Atheist]

:lol:

It's inverted here in the UK. The Northern term is soft southern ********. I don't know whether it's fair though.

Yep, that's the exact equivalent!

The rest of the country sees Aucklanders as a bunch of rich arrogant bastards that ignore the rest of the country.

Since Auckland arrogantly ignores the uncivilised parts of the country (everywhere outiside Auckland) while piling up huge riches, I find it all a bit odd.


We don't hear anything about your end of the world here - or anywhere exept the USA for that matter.

Yes, the US-centricism of news media is pretty universal.

The only time UK makes the news is when Prince Phil lets off a zinger.

[The Atheist]

Holy crap.

They're talking 1,000,000 dead lambs now. The worst spring storm in 50-100 years down south.

A million!

Don't expect cheap lamb for a while.

[Gilliatt Gurgle]

A story to strike fear into every sheep-farmer's heart.

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10674846

This storm will be nearly as devastating in dollar terms as the earthquake in the end.
I'm just waiting until someone reads the Jonah story and decides to throw me overboard!

Sounds like you are taking a beating down there.
Winter is not going away with a whisper.
I found this update article:

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/nz/news/article.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10675148





...Yes, the US-centricism of news media is pretty universal...

That and McDonalds!


You seem to be having a wee weather problem, earthquakes, storms the size of Australia, ad infinitum. The Arc idea seems to be beached. Gilliatt has cancelled the sloop and the general concencus appears to be you are on your own mate. Phone us when the sun re-appears. Your faithful pal Jocky.

Elissa is not eqiupped to handle those storms!
I'll drop anchor at Easter Island for the time being.


.

[prendrelemick]

Oh dear, a shortage of lamb! I hope prices don't go up.:drool5:


To be fair though, the second article about the Mental affects of a disasterous lambing time is spot on. I have known a couple, and it is difficult to keep fighting the overwhelming feeling that every thing you do is useless, and you might as well stay in bed. Its probably a mixture of exhaustion and depression.