Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

[The Atheist]

Bah, every time I come in here, that girly, "No Boys Allowed" thread is somewhere near the top. God knows what goes on in there - probably the typical girlie stuff about love, babies, quiche, who has a crush on whom and those things no Real Bloke [TM] would ever stoop to discuss.

What we need is a place for a man to pull up a chair, draw a fresh beer, and shoot the breeze about the important things in life - hunting, fishing, sports, beer, fine scotch, sports, almost-raw fillet steaks, sports, the latest Sports Illustrated photo shoot, Miss World, poker, gambling and sports.

Kind of a sin city without any women to keep us in line!

C'mon, men, can we keep a thread alive with real blokey subjects, or are we a bunch of wannabe girls who'd rather sip a cappachino than stand up and be stereotypes?

First off - beer is possibly the best chance christians have of proving a god exists. How something so beautiful - when made properly, which doesn't mean in some gigantic factory - can be made out of such unassuming ingredients, is a true miracle!

Like good wine, good beer should be savoured, not guzzled - and the best thing to do that with a really cold bottle of micro-brewed dark ale.

Other people may differ in opinion, but if so, their opinion won't count anyway!

:D

[kilted exile]

bah, dont need dark ale to be really chilled - leave that to the beers for women (eg coors light, bud - well really any american wannabe beer)

however that is not a serious enough topic for disagreement. Pass another of those barely cooked steaks over this way & where's the rugby ball gone?

[Niamh]

The last attempt of a Blokes thread died miserably pretty fast. :D

*sneaks out with rugby ball*

[librarius_qui]

It's the first and possibly the last time I step in here, but I had to say this: a chess club would help you more.

Good luck! :lol:

(Funny thing is ... I read "a thread for men" and first thing I see is a girl inside! haha! that's indeed a place for men :thumbs_up You begin well, very well.)

In fact, I think girls NEED this. Men don't. That's my thought, and this is why I'll possibly not come back.

(It'll stink soon! :sick: )

Arrr!~

[The Atheist]

bah, dont need dark ale to be really chilled - leave that to the beers for women (eg coors light, bud - well really any american wannabe beer)

Cultural bias - we drink our beer ice cold here.


however that is not a serious enough topic for disagreement. Pass another of those barely cooked steaks over this way & where's the rugby ball gone?

Quite right!

Rugby season started here a couple of weeks back - Super 14.


It's the first and possibly the last time I step in here, but I had to say this: a chess club would help you more.

Well, it wouldn't help me any, since I can't play it.

But feel free to talk about it. Is Kasparov the best player ever?


(Funny thing is ... I read "a thread for men" and first thing I see is a girl inside! haha! that's indeed a place for men :thumbs_up You begin well, very well.)

Yes, I'm about to deal with her....


In fact, I think girls NEED this. Men don't. That's my thought, and this is why I'll possibly not come back.

(It'll stink soon! :sick: )

Arrr!~

Nah, it'll be the best thread ever!

(so long as we can find some posters...)


The last attempt of a Blokes thread died miserably pretty fast. :D

*sneaks out with rugby ball*

Now, look you! Just because the girlie thread has 8 million views does not give you any bragging rights at all!

[Zee.]

This thread will not last.

[bazarov]

OK. Alan, I am opening two


and would like to ask you who you consider as the prettiest women tennis player?
Is it


or maybe

http://thetennistimes.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/02/maria-kirilienko.jpg

or maybe

http://selva4u.files.wordpress.com/2008/09/annaivanovich18.jpg

???

[Silas Thorne]

I'd have to say the first one. Does she grunt when she hits the ball though? I like me female tennis players who grunt well. LOL been drinking...yes, beer.

[PoeticPassions]

Ah, men!

(oh and really the last tennis player is the prettiest.) ;)


(but I am with lima on this... the thread will not last! muahahaha)

[Virgil]

Yeah I've seen that no boys allowed thread and always thought, there are roughly double the women than men here on lit net and they need their own thread? :lol: Count me in too. :D

Kilt is right about our beer iin the US, at least the major brands. If you try the small micro breweries you can find some good beer in America.

But cheers.

http://www.warsawtraveltours.com/zdjecia/beer.jpg

[papayahed]

I step in and I immediately have the urge to grunt and spit. I think i'll go back to the coffee talk thread.

[Chava]

For a thread that's meant for 'blokes', 5 out of 12 posts, have now been made by women

[Emil Miller]

For a thread that's meant for 'blokes', 5 out of 12 posts, have now been made by women

Which only goes to show that, no matter what men do, women can't leave them alone.

[The Atheist]

OK. Alan, I am opening two ...

Nice looking beer, but I'd be shooting the barman with that much froth!

And Kirilenko - by a mile!

Of retired players, Steffi Graf. If there's one thing I hate about Andre Agassi, it's that he married two women I could fall madly in love with.


Yeah I've seen that no boys allowed thread and always thought, there are roughly double the women than men here on lit net and they need their own thread? :lol: Count me in too. :D

Kilt is right about our beer iin the US, at least the major brands. If you try the small micro breweries you can find some good beer in America.

But cheers.

Cheers!


For a thread that's meant for 'blokes', 5 out of 12 posts, have now been made by women

Yes indeed - we smell the fear.

[Virgil]

Which only goes to show that, no matter what men do, women can't leave them alone.

God, don't I know it. My wife has been nagging me all weekend. :lol:

[Madhuri]

Even if women do not participate....the only topic that will keep this thread alive has to be on women....

I can see that most of the posts that guys have made are about women tennis players....

That is what guys talk about....all the time..... don't believe me....just have a look at Dori's latest blog entry.... ;)

[Lokasenna]

What about those of us who don't drink beer? Might I get away with a G&T? Or perhaps a glass of Pimms?

Nor do I follow tennis, but the second lady is certainly a looker, with the third one only a little behind. I suspect the photo of the first lass doesn't do her any favours, mind...

[Virgil]

Even if women do not participate....the only topic that will keep this thread alive has to be on women....

I can see that most of the posts that guys have made are about women tennis players....

That is what guys talk about....all the time..... don't believe me....just have a look at Dori's latest blog entry.... ;)

Ok if not tennis players, how about Anastasia Ashley, a professional surfer.

http://www.lat34.com/_/Photo/Nonex500/anastasia_ashley-beach.jpg
:D

[Emil Miller]

Even if women do not participate....the only topic that will keep this thread alive has to be on women....

I can see that most of the posts that guys have made are about women tennis players....

That is what guys talk about....all the time..... don't believe me....just have a look at Dori's latest blog entry.... ;)

With all due respect, Dori is 17 ( If I remember rightly ) and any heterosexual male of that age who doesn't continually think and talk about women has a problem.

[Emil Miller]

I suspect the photo of the first lass doesn't do her any favours, mind...

It certainly does me one!

[Zee.]

This thread is going to turn in to a perve-athon.

[Emil Miller]

Ok if not tennis players, how about Anastasia Ashley, a professional surfer.

http://www.lat34.com/_/Photo/Nonex500/anastasia_ashley-beach.jpg
:D

She's certainly a charmer Virgil but did the surfboard have to be in that position?

[The Atheist]

Which only goes to show that, no matter what men do, women can't leave them alone.

Bravo!

Look at 'em, they keep on coming in.

That's it, I'm password protecting the thread!


Even if women do not participate....the only topic that will keep this thread alive has to be on women....

Ah, but there's a huge difference in male reverence for the female form and women busting in on our party!


What about those of us who don't drink beer? Might I get away with a G&T? Or perhaps a glass of Pimms?

Hell yeah, G&T is ok.

As long as it's a good quality and the tonic is real tonic water. Angostura and a slice of lemon or lime is perfectly acceptable.

Pimms.... Hmmm. Bit "sherry", if you know what I mean - stick to G&T.


Nor do I follow tennis, but the second lady is certainly a looker, with the third one only a little behind. I suspect the photo of the first lass doesn't do her any favours, mind...

Plenty of other women's sports to consider - hockey (the one played on grass), soccer, netball, and surfing!


Ok if not tennis players, how about Anastasia Ashley, a professional surfer.

Wow.

I'm now sitting trying to figure why I've never followed surfing!


This thread is going to turn in to a perve-athon.

Yeah! Great eh?

:D

[Virgil]

With all due respect, Dori is 17 ( If I remember rightly ) and any heterosexual male of that age who doesn't continually think and talk about women has a problem.

What's my excuse? :D

[skib]

Ok if not tennis players, how about Anastasia Ashley, a professional surfer.

http://www.lat34.com/_/Photo/Nonex500/anastasia_ashley-beach.jpg
:D

Ahh, Virgil, that is refreshing! I'm a-gonna go with the second tennis player, as well. The first and last did not do much for me.

Lets see- my thoughts about beer . . . local breweries are okay, beer in general is great every once in a while, but I think I'll throw a shout out to my best friends in Lynchburg.
So, gentlemen, what are your thoughts on what all the lovely pictured ladies on this thread choose to imbibe?

[The Comedian]

I hope this is the right thread for this little tidbit: but I just stepped outside my house, walked across the yard, took a few steps into the woods, and peed. And you know what I felt when the experience was over? PRIDE. :lol:

[skib]

Fantastic! Peeing outside is the ultimate pride and joy of a man, in my opinion.

[Emil Miller]

I hope this is the right thread for this little tidbit: but I just stepped outside my house, walked across the yard, took a few steps into the woods, and peed. And you know what I felt when the experience was over? PRIDE. :lol:

Isn't that carrying your liking for Walden a little too far? Why didn't you use the toilet?

[The Atheist]

What's my excuse? :D

Good point - it doesn't make much difference how old you are.

These are still as good as ever:

Female brain (http://www.4bearsonline.com/collections/images/femalebrain.gif)
Male brain (http://www.4bearsonline.com/collections/images/malebrain.gif)


Ahh, Virgil, that is refreshing! I'm a-gonna go with the second tennis player, as well. The first and last did not do much for me.

I will have to say that, as already noted, Sharapova's photo doesn't do her justice.

Check here (http://www.vtennis.co.uk/maria-sharapova-swimsuit.htm), along with any others.

It could be that women's tennis was the greatest beneficiary of the fall of the Berlin Wall. I can recall the days when Chris Evert was the babest of them. She wouldn't make today's top 20.


So, gentlemen, what are your thoughts on what all the lovely pictured ladies on this thread choose to imbibe?

I'd find it hard to believe that a surfer chick wouldn't have a beer now and then.

[skib]

Good point - it doesn't make much difference how old you are.

These are still as good as ever:

Female brain (http://www.4bearsonline.com/collections/images/femalebrain.gif)
Male brain (http://www.4bearsonline.com/collections/images/malebrain.gif)



I will have to say that, as already noted, Sharapova's photo doesn't do her justice.

Check here (http://www.vtennis.co.uk/maria-sharapova-swimsuit.htm), along with any others.

It could be that women's tennis was the greatest beneficiary of the fall of the Berlin Wall. I can recall the days when Chris Evert was the babest of them. She wouldn't make today's top 20.



I'd find it hard to believe that a surfer chick wouldn't have a beer now and then.


Yes, those pics are much better . . .

Those brain diagrams almost made me pee myself.:lol::thumbs_up

I wouldn't know much about the Berlin wall- that was WAY before my time.

[The Atheist]

Those brain diagrams almost made me pee myself.:lol::thumbs_up

Ah, you know what they say, inside every stereotype lies a prototype...

:D


I wouldn't know much about the Berlin wall- that was WAY before my time.

Ouch, you must be a young 'un.

Are you old enough to drink beer? (That's not compulsory, by the way - I'd expect that most people here have a good attitude towards drinking.)

[Chava]

I'm no bloke, but I couldn't resist a bit of a british remark concerning american beer; in the words of eminent Monty Python,


American beer is like making love in a canoe.
It's f******* close to water.


Oh, and since this is a forum about great thinkers, and this is a thread about alcohol, this second contribution is in order:


Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy beggar
Who could take you under the table
David Hume could out-consume
Schopenhauer and Hegel
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as sloshed as Schlegel
There's nothing Nietszche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist
Socrates himself was permanently pissed
John Stuart Mill of his own free will
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill
Plato they say could stick it away
Half a crate of whiskey every day
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle
Hobbes was fond of his Dram
And Rene Descartes was a drunken fart
"I drink, therefore I am !"
Yes Socrates himself is particularly missed
A lovely little thinker
But a bugger when he's pissed.

That's it for me, I'll go away now :)

[The Atheist]

I'm no bloke, but I couldn't resist a bit of a british remark concerning american beer; in the words of eminent Monty Python,

That's still true!

But if you're not a bloke, what are you doing in the men's thread?

Jeez, if ever there needed to be an example of why males need a place away from females, this thread is surely it! Can't go two posts without some interfering woman sticking her beak in.

I'm warning you - I will bring beer into the girlie thread if this continues. This is the War of the Sexes at the front line!

:D


That's it for me, I'll go away now :)

Don't let that url hit you in the rear on the way!

[Chava]

I'm warning you - I will bring beer into the girlie thread if this continues.

Please do, I'd rather have a good dark Belgien ale, then a mug of tea. :) You can't intimidate me at all.

[Emil Miller]

What's my excuse? :D

Retarded development or you have been lying about your age.

[The Atheist]

Are we allowed to talk about kids in a Real Blokes thread?

I think it's probably ok as long as you stick to describing how awful they are, how much you'd like to strangle them on occasions and how much you think you could sell your family for on ebay.

No "My little princess is so wonderful, she can count to a million and she's only 9 months old...." stuff, ok? Leave that for that coffee thread.


Please do, I'd rather have a good dark Belgien ale, then a mug of tea. :) You can't intimidate me at all.

Haha! I certainly can:


I hope this is the right thread for this little tidbit: but I just stepped outside my house, walked across the yard, took a few steps into the woods, and peed. And you know what I felt when the experience was over? PRIDE. :lol:

Beat that!

You know you can't. Just face it - men rule.

(And if in doubt, check here (http://www.info-regenten.de/regent/regent-e/) ;) )


Retarded development or you have been lying about your age.

Yikes! I must be in trouble then, and my 80-year old mate reckons his brain still works the same way, so he's in even bigger trouble.

[Chava]

Haha! I certainly can

No, that isn't the least bit scary. Back in the days of the rainforest, we didn't even have toilet paper, we had leaves. You're going to have to try harder. ;)

[skib]

If we ABSOLUTELY must bring age into it, legally, no, I'm 19, but since when has that stopped anybody? ;)

And on the topic of kids! I hate kids. Kids are crawling/climbing nightmares. Every time a kid screams at a restaurant or in a store, I cringe, and whoever I am with says, "You were just like that once," I can say, "No, I wasn't. My 'rents whacked me every time I made a scene in public!" Needless to say, I didn't make scenes in public.

When one of my cousins was very little (around five or six) we were visiting the new house, and he just walked up behind me and bit me right square on the ***. No warning, just CHOMP! I've hated kids ever since.

[Emil Miller]

I wouldn't know much about the Berlin wall- that was WAY before my time.

For those of us who had to go through it, you don't know how lucky you are.

[skib]

Must have been pretty bad then? (please pardon my historical ignorance- I have a hard enough time analyzing the present!):redface:

[Emil Miller]

Must have been pretty bad then? (please pardon my historical ignorance- I have a hard enough time analyzing the present!):redface:

Could it have something to do with the Jack Daniel's?

[skib]

Possibly in the past, but as of late the adult indulgences have been few and far between. It may also have something to do with the fact that half the time I am in the mountains cut off from the rest of the world. In all likelihood, it is a combination of things.

[Scheherazade]

Here is the url for the previous boys-only thread:

http://www.online-literature.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27197&highlight=allowed

[Virgil]

Here is the url for the previous boys-only thread:

http://www.online-literature.com/forums/showthread.php?t=27197&highlight=allowed

The very first comment in there after it was started was by me and I asked if I could brng beer. :lol: Some things never change. ;)

[Scheherazade]

Some things never change. ;)Can never decide whether that is a good thing or not! ;)

[Virgil]

Can never decide whether that is a good thing or not! ;)

For better or worse, the basics of men are universal and constant. :D

[Janine]

Curiosity killed the cat - here I am, the cat!

:lol:
For better or worse, the basics of men are universal and constant

and say what???
........ummm what exactly are the basics? :lol:

Whose got the beer?

[higley]

Beer, checking out ladies, and an intimate knowledge of Chuck Norris movies.

[BienvenuJDC]

higley...you ARE one of the ladies...

[mono]

Fight Song for the Men of LitNet
by mono

Kindly, gentlemen, of the LitNet, lend me your ears,
Even you, our Creator Admin, and hold up your beers,
For a time has come that we keep our thread alive,
And we, the men of LitNet, will surely survive!

Come Atheist, Virgil, JBI, Brian, and kilted alike,
And bazarov, and Silas, and Taliesen, we can do as we like,
And we can speak in masculine tones that we connive,
For we, the men of LitNet, shall certainly survive!

Come skib, Lokasenna, and crisaor we cannot forget,
And Comedian and Aimus, we can do like we shall never regret,
And librarius and NikolaiI, let us make this our testosterone hive,
Since we, the men of LitNet, can definitely survive!

In other places, we can speak of literature and poetry,
Or of religion, or quotations, and even philosophy;
Here we may collect and let our manlyhood drive,
Hence we, the men of LitNet, do indeed survive!

Let us roar, and boast, and brag of sounds from our orfices,
And fantasize of secretaries working in our offices,
Since our endowed competitiveness cannot let this thread dive,
Because we, the men of LitNet, are to survive!

We can argue and parade of our various sports,
And leave the women to volleyball and tennis courts,
Yet as the very best we can always strive,
But we, the men of LitNet, come here to survive!

So hold up your ales, your lagers, and I’ll have my porter,
Since among we men, we can have no hoarder;
Bless us with a “Cheers!” as we have brought this to life,
For we, the men of LitNet, will of course survive!



*shakes fist in the air, with a vegetarian hotdog in the other hand* :D

[higley]

Pffft I know some of you boys drink girly cocktails.

Very impressive poem mono, however it seems you feel oppressed by our female presence? Or perhaps--threatened? :D

[Virgil]

Curiosity killed the cat - here I am, the cat!

:lol:

and say what???
........ummm what exactly are the basics? :lol:


If you have to ask, you're not too familiar with men. :lol:

This thread is a ball of laughs. :D

[mono]

Very impressive poem mono, however it seems you feel oppressed by our female presence? Or perhaps--threatened? :D
Nah, not at all! :lol:
If I ever ended up as one of the members of the Little Rascals, I would have seemed more like Alfalfa than Spanky, Buckwheat, or Stymie - the one who still has an affinity for women, despite co-owning the "He-Man Woman Haters Club." :D

[skib]

Fight Song for the Men of LitNet
by mono

Kindly, gentlemen, of the LitNet, lend me your ears,
Even you, our Creator Admin, and hold up your beers,
For a time has come that we keep our thread alive,
And we, the men of LitNet, will surely survive!

Come Atheist, Virgil, JBI, Brian, and kilted alike,
And bazarov, and Silas, and Taliesen, we can do as we like,
And we can speak in masculine tones that we connive,
For we, the men of LitNet, shall certainly survive!

Come skib, Lokasenna, and crisaor we cannot forget,
And Comedian and Aimus, we can do like we shall never regret,
And librarius and NikolaiI, let us make this our testosterone hive,
Since we, the men of LitNet, can definitely survive!

In other places, we can speak of literature and poetry,
Or of religion, or quotations, and even philosophy;
Here we may collect and let our manlyhood drive,
Hence we, the men of LitNet, do indeed survive!

Let us roar, and boast, and brag of sounds from our orfices,
And fantasize of secretaries working in our offices,
Since our endowed competitiveness cannot let this thread dive,
Because we, the men of LitNet, are to survive!

We can argue and parade of our various sports,
And leave the women to volleyball and tennis courts,
Yet as the very best we can always strive,
But we, the men of LitNet, come here to survive!

So hold up your ales, your lagers, and I’ll have my porter,
Since among we men, we can have no hoarder;
Bless us with a “Cheers!” as we have brought this to life,
For we, the men of LitNet, will of course survive!



*shakes fist in the air, with a vegetarian hotdog in the other hand* :D


I love it! I'm adopting it as my new theme song for party entries!!:D

[The Atheist]

And on the topic of kids! I hate kids. Kids are crawling/climbing nightmares.

Never lose sight of that!


Beer, checking out ladies, and an intimate knowledge of Chuck Norris movies.

Chuck Norris?

We're men, not neaderthals!

[skib]

Chuck Norris really died fifty years ago, but the Grim Reaper is too scared to tell him . . .
sorry. I couldn't resist!


I must say, though, Mrs. Higley has it down pretty close to pat. Kudos! You are close to understanding a mans purpose in life.

[higley]

It's only Ms. Higley, I don't understand men THAT well.... :D

[skib]

I apologize!! I feel awful!! I hope I didn't offend too terribly??

[higley]

Not at all!

[skib]

Oh good!
I can remove my foot from my mouth now.
Now, gentlemen. What other topic of extraordinary manliness shall we discuss?
1)the hair on our chests
2) our manly vehicle
3) our bench-press maximum
4) our . . . )think of something manly)
5) . . . .

[Silas Thorne]

Our fight stories, boxing, martial arts, rugby...
The time I drank a whole litre of vodka, in about 20 minutes, and didn't die. yay! :) although the next morning I wish I did!

[The Atheist]

Now, gentlemen. What other topic of extraordinary manliness shall we discuss?
1)the hair on our chests

Nah, might embarrass the young fellas


2) our manly vehicle

Hmmm. I could have last year, but since I sold my Falcon, I'm driving the least manly car in the world, a 1300cc Toyota.

Feel free to really upset me by talking V8s.


3) our bench-press maximum

Ah, now you're talking. I never used to do weights, but when I was gardening and lawnmowing - about 20 years back - I once lifted a log that two others oculdn't move between them. Probably about 14kg of it.


4) our . . . )think of something manly)

Sure will!


Our fight stories, boxing, martial arts, rugby...
The time I drank a whole litre of vodka, in about 20 minutes, and didn't die. yay! :) although the next morning I wish I did!

Oh don't start that...

I have so many bad stories from years past that we just should not go there!

:D

[SleepyWitch]

You know you can't. Just face it - men rule.



women can't pee in the woods? I do it all the time! Well, not standing up, of course.. anyway, when it comes to taking a crap in the woods we're all the same, boys, girls, blokes, men, women ...

[*Classic*Charm*]

when it comes to taking a crap in the woods we're all the same, boys, girls, blokes, men, women ...

You might just be my new favourite person in the whole world:lol::lol::lol:

And really, gents, you don't seem to have accomplished much for having five pages of responses here. Where's the nitty gritty man conversation? I don't see many conclusions being drawn or problems being solved the way we do over in the Coffee thread!! :cool:

[kevinthediltz]

And really, gents, you don't seem to have accomplished much for having five pages of responses here. Where's the nitty gritty man conversation? I don't see many conclusions being drawn or problems being solved the way we do over in the Coffee thread!! :cool:

Because we already know the two answer to every question.
A:Boobs
B:Use a bigger hammer

[*Classic*Charm*]

Because we already know the two answer to every question.
A:Boobs
B:Use a bigger hammer

Well played;)

[a_little_wisp]

*puts on a fake beard and flops into the biggest, manliest chair*

Hey guys. :cool: How 'bout them girls, eh? Heh. *Sip beer* :sick:- I mean, :cool: I've killed a few squirrels in my day, ya know? Yeap.

[SleepyWitch]

*puts on a fake beard and flops into the biggest, manliest chair*


yeah? My fake beard is longer than yours!!! In fact, I have to tie it up in a man-bun, otherwise it would dangle down so low I couldn't reach my fake b*lls to scratch them!

[Emil Miller]

It's only Ms. Higley, I don't understand men THAT well.... :D

You have no idea what joys await you.

[kevinthediltz]

Its seems we have two manly, manly men joining us. Well boys, whats your favorite type of scotch? favorite tool company? And favorite pair of boobs?
Being men like you are I'm sure you will have no problem answering these questions...

[Emil Miller]

women can't pee in the woods? I do it all the time! Well, not standing up, of course.. anyway, when it comes to taking a crap in the woods we're all the same, boys, girls, blokes, men, women ...

I hate to say it Sleepywitch but you have just proved that women usually end up talking crap.

[*Classic*Charm*]

Its seems we have two manly, manly men joining us. Well boys, whats your favorite type of scotch? favorite tool company? And favorite pair of boobs?
Being men like you are I'm sure you will have no problem answering these questions...

Glenfiddich!
Bosch!
All of them!

Am I a man or what?:brow:

Also, to the other manly-men around, my fake back hair is longer than all of your fake beards put together! :brow:

[a_little_wisp]

(<--- new manly avatar)


*Spits, in a manly way.* Well, Kev. I'm a Glenlivet gir- guy myself. Ermm.. I'm not too picky about my tools, ya know - because with tools, it kinda all depends on the man usin' 'em, you know? HEH HEH, if you get my drift - HEH.

Best, erm - *hastily flips through blog* - Bodacious Tatas:

http://www.mathies.com/blog/scarlett_johansson3.jpg

[The Atheist]

And really, gents, you don't seem to have accomplished much for having five pages of responses here. Where's the nitty gritty man conversation?

Well, at this stage, we're struggling to get rid of the women so we can have some nitty gritty manly conversation.


I don't see many conclusions being drawn or problems being solved the way we do over in the Coffee thread!! :cool:

Conclusions? Problem solving?

We're men, dammit - we don't have a thread to solve problems or draw conclusions; that stuff's in philosophy, which has already been covered by Mr Python.

Get thee back to the coffee thread!

There must be an axiom in this thread somewhere - half the females on the board have posted in it already.

They love us so much, they just can't leave us alone!

:D

[a_little_wisp]

Classic, you're a much better man than I am.

But I'm STILL A MAN. (Which, Kevin, makes our internet relationship somewhat more complicated, I'm sorry.)

What females you talkin' 'bout, Atheist? Eh?

[Silas Thorne]

Yes,that must be true! ;)

Just saw 'Best, erm - *hastily flips through blog* - Bodacious Tatas: '
hehemhem clearing my throat... :)

[a_little_wisp]

Classic, you're a much better man than I am.

But I'm STILL A MAN. (Which, Kevin, makes our internet relationship somewhat more complicated, I'm sorry.)

What females you talkin' 'bout, Atheist? Eh?

[kevinthediltz]

But I'm STILL A MAN. (Which, Kevin, makes our internet relationship somewhat more complicated, I'm sorry.)

Is there something we need to talk about, dear?

Oh, good boob choice. :lol:

[a_little_wisp]

(Oh wow, it posted twice! o_o)

Nah, nah, Kev'. S'all good. EH HEM. later, later!

... Dude, it's kinda hard to be a man.

[*Classic*Charm*]

... Dude, it's kinda hard to be a man.

Yeah, this constant need to eat, expel noxious gasses, and check out women is tiring!! WOW we men have got it tough :rolleyes:

[a_little_wisp]

So Classic. :D About Jane Austen.

[PoeticPassions]

boobs are overrated. it's all about the butt...

yeah.

[kevinthediltz]

boobs are overrated. it's all about the butt...

yeah.

Could this be a genuine man we have come across? :D
He speaks the way of the grunt...

[a_little_wisp]

I gotcha, Poetic, I gotcha. :cool: But you know, its the legs for me.

[*Classic*Charm*]

Well I like a woman with a brain!! Am I right, men? Anyone?

**listens for the crickets**

[a_little_wisp]

(Mulan reference, Classic? No? :D Yes?)

**Crickets**

[kevinthediltz]

I am resorting to TRUE man talk to sort out the fakies...

Grunt, grunt, gruntgrunt, grunt, gur-unt, grunt. *Points at female body* GURRRRRUNT!

[PoeticPassions]

Sometimes I wish I was a man, for at least a week. Oh all the things that I would do...

But hey, sometimes I want to talk about butts and boobs and alcohol... why must we have these classifications??? I don't like talking about make-up, designers, or any of that stuff anyway... the one girly thing I do talk about is hot men. Other than that, I don't see why all these supposedly male things must exclude women?? Down with the old ways of thinking, I say! :D

[kevinthediltz]

Well I like a woman with a brain!! Am I right, men? Anyone?

**listens for the crickets**

Yes. Ill take a brain over a body anyday.

[PoeticPassions]

Intelligence is the sexiest ASSet. Sorry, I have an obsession with butts.

[a_little_wisp]

Ah HAH. We've weeded out the woman imposter!! -

It's Kevinella. Nice job, Classic.

[kevinthediltz]

Ah HAH. We've weeded out the woman imposter!! -

It's Kevinella. Nice job, Classic.

Damn you.....

[*Classic*Charm*]

Yessss high fives! I mean...props? (I mean that awkward thing guys do with their hands)

??

[The Atheist]

Yeah, this constant need to eat, expel noxious gasses,...

Ah, but at least blokes do it honestly - my kids crack up with the finger-pull fart. Not like those sneaky girls who quietly let off a stinker then try to blame the dog!


I gotcha, Poetic, I gotcha. :cool: But you know, its the legs for me.

Yes indeed, a great pair of legs takes all sorts of beating. (Says he married to a dancer.... ;) )


Well I like a woman with a brain!! Am I right, men? Anyone?

**listens for the crickets**

*splutter*

A brain? God no! Those ones have their brain attached to their mouth and they talk! No, a lobotomy is an ideal trait in a woman.


Yessss high fives! I mean...props? (I mean that awkward thing guys do with their hands)

??

The high five slap is a tough one to learn.

[*Classic*Charm*]

The high five slap is a tough one to learn.

No it's not! Look at each other's elbows and just give 'er. You'll never miss, guaranteed. Try it!

[Scheherazade]

Yes. Ill take a brain over a body anyday.As long as it is attached to a curvy female body?

;)


Even though it is "boys-only" thread here, could I address the girls in this thread please?

What are you doing?

I am a little embarrassed that some (will not name names but I am sure they know who they are) are claiming to be men and post in this thread pretending to be men! That is very disappointing.

Why, oh, why would anyone to pretend to be men? Want to be a man?

We have to give it to the guys that even if occassionally they post in the Coffee thread, none of them come in high heels and say things like "Why do my nails keek chipping? Should I have caramel or light blond highlights? Does my bum look big in this?"

I might even propose that those who have made that unfortunate choice get banned from the "girls-only" thread for a week or so!

[PoeticPassions]

I hope I wasn't pretending to be a guy... I think it was obvious I was just a girl wanting to talk about guy things :D

guy talk is more fun than girl talk sometimes.

[Niamh]

Fight Song for the Men of LitNet
by mono

Kindly, gentlemen, of the LitNet, lend me your ears,
Even you, our Creator Admin, and hold up your beers,
For a time has come that we keep our thread alive,
And we, the men of LitNet, will surely survive!

Come Atheist, Virgil, JBI, Brian, and kilted alike,
And bazarov, and Silas, and Taliesen, we can do as we like,
And we can speak in masculine tones that we connive,
For we, the men of LitNet, shall certainly survive!

Come skib, Lokasenna, and crisaor we cannot forget,
And Comedian and Aimus, we can do like we shall never regret,
And librarius and NikolaiI, let us make this our testosterone hive,
Since we, the men of LitNet, can definitely survive!

In other places, we can speak of literature and poetry,
Or of religion, or quotations, and even philosophy;
Here we may collect and let our manlyhood drive,
Hence we, the men of LitNet, do indeed survive!

Let us roar, and boast, and brag of sounds from our orfices,
And fantasize of secretaries working in our offices,
Since our endowed competitiveness cannot let this thread dive,
Because we, the men of LitNet, are to survive!

We can argue and parade of our various sports,
And leave the women to volleyball and tennis courts,
Yet as the very best we can always strive,
But we, the men of LitNet, come here to survive!

So hold up your ales, your lagers, and I’ll have my porter,
Since among we men, we can have no hoarder;
Bless us with a “Cheers!” as we have brought this to life,
For we, the men of LitNet, will of course survive!



*shakes fist in the air, with a vegetarian hotdog in the other hand* :D

That is really cool Mono!!!!!:thumbs_up Found myself punching the air along with it and i'm not even a man! :lol:

Ok for all the "men" in this thread... you all asked for it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lUjhEHlh7s

[Chava]

Fight Song for the Men of LitNet
by mono

Kindly, gentlemen, of the LitNet, lend me your ears,
Even you, our Creator Admin, and hold up your beers,
For a time has come that we keep our thread alive,
And we, the men of LitNet, will surely survive!

Come Atheist, Virgil, JBI, Brian, and kilted alike,
And bazarov, and Silas, and Taliesen, we can do as we like,
And we can speak in masculine tones that we connive,
For we, the men of LitNet, shall certainly survive!

Come skib, Lokasenna, and crisaor we cannot forget,
And Comedian and Aimus, we can do like we shall never regret,
And librarius and NikolaiI, let us make this our testosterone hive,
Since we, the men of LitNet, can definitely survive!

In other places, we can speak of literature and poetry,
Or of religion, or quotations, and even philosophy;
Here we may collect and let our manlyhood drive,
Hence we, the men of LitNet, do indeed survive!

Let us roar, and boast, and brag of sounds from our orfices,
And fantasize of secretaries working in our offices,
Since our endowed competitiveness cannot let this thread dive,
Because we, the men of LitNet, are to survive!

We can argue and parade of our various sports,
And leave the women to volleyball and tennis courts,
Yet as the very best we can always strive,
But we, the men of LitNet, come here to survive!

So hold up your ales, your lagers, and I’ll have my porter,
Since among we men, we can have no hoarder;
Bless us with a “Cheers!” as we have brought this to life,
For we, the men of LitNet, will of course survive!



*shakes fist in the air, with a vegetarian hotdog in the other hand* :D

So... Does this come with a manly dance routine? Testosterone hive, indeed. :lol:

[Lokasenna]

Mono, you are officially brilliant!

[Emil Miller]

We have to give it to the guys that even if occassionally they post in the Coffee thread, none of them come in high heels and say things like "Why do my nails keek chipping? Should I have caramel or light blond highlights? Does my bum look big in this?"


There might be a few who would.

[The Comedian]

mono -- awesome poem, I plan to read it again the next time I have to hit the head.

To the rest of the men: I offer us to reflect on one of life's great pleasures. The pleasure of which I speak, of course, is drinking cold beer in the shower. Now, if you have not had the wherewithal to crack open a cold Budweiser (or brew of choice) before reaching for that bar of Ivory soap, then you are missing out.

In undergrad, drinking beer in the shower was so popular, that we had a miniature refrigerator well socked with the cheapest brew from the cheapest liquor store next to the toilet.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to shower up before I go to work.

Good Hunting!

[papayahed]

To the rest of the men: I offer us to reflect on one of life's great pleasures. The pleasure of which I speak, of course, is drinking cold beer in the shower. Now, if you have not had the wherewithal to crack open a cold Budweiser (or brew of choice) before reaching for that bar of Ivory soap, then you are missing out.

In undergrad, drinking beer in the shower was so popular, that we had a miniature refrigerator well socked with the cheapest brew from the cheapest liquor store next to the toilet.



Really?:lol:

[Whifflingpin]

"In undergrad, drinking beer in the shower was so popular, that we had a miniature refrigerator well socked with the cheapest brew from the cheapest liquor store next to the toilet. "

"Really?"

I expect they poured it straight in, just to cut out the middle man.

[BienvenuJDC]

Fight Song for the Men of LitNet
by mono

Kindly, gentlemen, of the LitNet, lend me your ears,
Even you, our Creator Admin, and hold up your beers,
For a time has come that we keep our thread alive,
And we, the men of LitNet, will surely survive!


......


So hold up your ales, your lagers, and I’ll have my porter,
Since among we men, we can have no hoarder;
Bless us with a “Cheers!” as we have brought this to life,
For we, the men of LitNet, will of course survive!



*shakes fist in the air, with a vegetarian hotdog in the other hand* :D

This ought to be published...

What thread am I missing out on here?

[kevinthediltz]

We talk about boobs and hammers. But the women couldnt resist joining us. Tired of talking about purses it seems...

[bazarov]

Mono - BRAVO!!! :D

Atheist - agree on the beer, 45 angle rule was somehow forgotten :lol:

Some of you remember Denise Richards in early days? Or hate hairs in nose (I cried yesterday because of it)?

Smile and eyes are top; boobs and *** will be ruined after first child or after hard break up :)

Pilsner, wheat/white beer or black beer? What do you prefer?

P.S. Bud and something from Australia (Forest ?)- only two outside from Europe I tried and also two worst beers I ever tried.:sick:

[BienvenuJDC]

We talk about boobs and hammers. But the women couldnt resist joining us. Tired of talking about purses it seems...

Well...I don't have any boobs yet, but as I guess as I get older, I'll have to get me one of Kramer's Bro contraptions (Seinfeld episode). But I do work in the construction field...that's where we hoot and holler...and make cat calls...right?

[kevinthediltz]

Well...I don't have any boobs yet, but as I guess as I get older, I'll have to get me one of Kramer's Bro contraptions (Seinfeld episode). But I do work in the construction field...that's where we hoot and holler...and make cat calls...right?

The construction site is where we create all our philosophy.

[SleepyWitch]

Pilsner, wheat/white beer or black beer? What do you prefer?

P.S. Bud and something from Australia (Forest ?)- only two outside from Europe I tried and also two worst beers I ever tried.:sick:

Fosters? Does it come in a dark blue can? They can't be worse than Stella Atois (sp?)

[The Comedian]

Hey guys,

I'm loving all the wonderful topics that this thread addresses: beer, chicks, poetry, beer, chicks, beer. . . But something was missing (to me at least): fish. Do any of you all go fishing? If so, I can' think of a better place than here to tell your "big fish" stories.

When I'm not at work, I'll post a picture of a beautiful brook trout (speckled trout, for the Canucks here) that I have mounted to the wall of my reading room.

:)

[Niamh]

P.S. Bud and something from Australia (Forest ?)- only two outside from Europe I tried and also two worst beers I ever tried.:sick:


Fosters? Does it come in a dark blue can? They can't be worse than Stella Atois (sp?)
Yeah i reckon hes on about Fosters. Possibly the rankest beer on the planet.
You forgot the R in Artois. And its not that bad...
*spots an Erdinger Weiss, grabs it, and sneaks out of "the blokes thread" and heads for "Who wants a Beer!"*

[The Atheist]

Or hate hairs in nose (I cried yesterday because of it)?

Nose hair!

That's another of the things which prove that god is really a woman. I mean, childbirth, periods, bah - they're nothing; women would give up if they had to go through what we men do.


Smile and eyes are top; boobs and *** will be ruined after first child or after hard break up :)

Shhh - we don't want the young fellas to get the right idea.


P.S. Bud and something from Australia (Forest ?)- only two outside from Europe I tried and also two worst beers I ever tried.:sick:


Fosters? Does it come in a dark blue can? They can't be worse than Stella Atois (sp?)

It would definitely be Fosters, because that is the second-worst beer in the world.

Just behind Budweiser as the worst.


Hey guys,

I'm loving all the wonderful topics that this thread addresses: beer, chicks, poetry, beer, chicks, beer. . . But something was missing (to me at least): fish. Do any of you all go fishing? If so, I can' think of a better place than here to tell your "big fish" stories.

When I'm not at work, I'll post a picture of a beautiful brook trout (speckled trout, for the Canucks here) that I have mounted to the wall of my reading room.

:)

Fishing? You bet.

I dunno about that stuff you catch in rivers & lakes though - fishing is what we do in the sea and I don't think the excuse that the sea is 8000 miles away is much of an excuse.

This is just my daughter's best catch from a while back:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/baje20fish.jpg

[Mathor]

In response to the aforementioned female tennis players, Ana Ivanovic (the third one) is by far the most attractive. Brunettes.

Are men obsessed with beer or something? I'd take straight whiskey over it any day.

[Emil Miller]

Fosters? Does it come in a dark blue can? They can't be worse than Stella Atois (sp?)

Yes it is in a dark blue can and tastes absolutely dreadful but because it is weak and cheaper than many other beers, it is popular with teenagers. One must be carefull in pubs when talking about beers though because it could cause trouble. I went into a pub and asked for a pint of lager. The barman asked if I wanted Fosters and I said "That's only for women and children" and ordered something else. When the barman asked a guy standing next to me what he wanted, he replied "Fosters."
Stella Artois is a better drink but no match for Leffe Blonde which is the best lager in the world and rather expensive.
You must remember that we do not have the Reinheitsgebot in the UK, so most German lagers are made here under licence and bear no relation to the original German beers.

[Mathor]

Yes it is in a dark blue can and tastes absolutely dreadful but because it is weak and cheaper than many other beers, it is popular with teenagers. One must be carefull in pubs when talking about beers though because it could cause trouble. I went into a pub and asked for a pint of lager. The barman asked if I wanted Fosters and I said "That's only for women and children" and ordered something else. When the barman asked a guy standing next to me what he wanted, he replied "Fosters."
Stella Artois is a better drink but no match for Leffe Blonde which is the best lager in the world and rather expensive.
You must remember that we do not have the Reinheitsgebot in the UK, so most German lagers are made here under licence and bear no relation to the original German beers.

Stella Artois makes me want to kill myself. I do not mind some Fosters, though. There are a lot of American beers that can compete with both of those on the 'nasty' scale.

I prefer the Vermont beer Magic Hat Number 9

EDIT: but then again, I'm American, what do I know

[Emil Miller]

Stella Artois makes me want to kill myself. I do not mind some Fosters, though. There are a lot of American beers that can compete with both of those on the 'nasty' scale.

I prefer the Vermont beer Magic Hat Number 9

EDIT: but then again, I'm American, what do I know

I admit that I haven't had Stella Artois for some time so perhaps it has deteriorated in the interim. There are a number of American beers other than Budweiser available in the UK such as Coors and Miller Light but they are all pretty tasteless, as are the majority of British lagers. There is one really powerfull British lager called Tennants Super which does live up to its name but is very strong and, as far as I know, cannot be bought in pubs but is sold in tins. Americans and others coming to these shores are often puzzled by English Ale, colloquially known as bitter, and is completely different from lager and drunk by a large part of the male drinking public. It is, in my view, a much tatstier beer than lager and is also cheaper. The one drawback is the calorie count which means an increase in weight greater than that for lager drinkers. I like it but for visiting foreigners it is an acquired taste, I heard one German describe it as like drinking diesel oil.

[Janine]

If you have to ask, you're not too familiar with men. :lol:

No, I don't have to ask; and I am quite familar with men's ways, thank you! And now, I see a lot of women invaders to this thread....it's getting more posts than any other threads, I noticed...quite the place to hang out these days....:D

....and Mono, I loved your poem! :thumbs_up:lol:


This thread is a ball of laughs. :D

hahaah...is that a play on words, Virgil? Like I don't know by now how you think. :lol:

[BienvenuJDC]

Play on words...you ought to check out the Thread about clothing...would that be a Thread of threads?

[skib]

In response to the aforementioned female tennis players, Ana Ivanovic (the third one) is by far the most attractive. Brunettes.

Are men obsessed with beer or something? I'd take straight whiskey over it any day.

I'm with you, Mathor! Jack me! Or Jim me. Or Knob me. **** it. Just whiskey me.

[skib]

So, on hammers. Who here thinks he owns the most expensive hammer? Sledge and trim hammers excluded. I'm talking framing hammers/framing hatchets.
And while we're here, how heavy a hammer do you swing? ;)

[Emil Miller]

So, on hammers. Who here thinks he owns the most expensive hammer? Sledge and trim hammers excluded. I'm talking framing hammers/framing hatchets.
And while we're here, how heavy a hammer do you swing? ;)

Hammers are of limited interest to most people, even men, can't we get back to the booze and women ? The two most important things in a man's life.

[Silas Thorne]

Just about any kind of Speights lager is great.

Drinking Fosters I'd imagine would be like drinking urinary excretions of the equine variety.

But I also like Guinness, though since I've never been to Ireland I'll never know what the real stuff is like...

And watch this sketch, 'Four Yorkshiremen', from Monty Python if you think you're tough these days...:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FatHLHG2uGY

[Janine]

Play on words...you ought to check out the Thread about clothing...would that be a Thread of threads?

Oh no, how did I miss that one; can you direct me to it, BienvenuJDC? I would accept that - 'a thread of threads'...sure why not.

[Janine]

Hammers are of limited interest to most people, even men, can't we get back to the booze and women ? The two most important things in a man's life.

Yeah, for women! And I like Peter Gabriel's song 'Sledge Hammer'! There's a double meaning in that.;):lol:

[The Atheist]

....

Janine... Funny name for a bloke.


So, on hammers. Who here thinks he owns the most expensive hammer? Sledge and trim hammers excluded. I'm talking framing hammers/framing hatchets.
And while we're here, how heavy a hammer do you swing? ;)

14oz Stanley.

I'm not really a tool guy, but I do like to use good quality tools.

Knives, however, I like.

I have a hand-crafted Buck which cost me $300 a few years back.


Just about any kind of Speights lager is great.

Hey, a Southern Man! Now, that's a real man.


Drinking Fosters I'd imagine would be like drinking urinary excretions of the equine variety.

Feline.


And watch this sketch, 'Four Yorkshiremen', from Monty Python if you think you're tough these days...:

Haha. I love seeing all these - I can recall watching them on tv when they were originally made.

[Silas Thorne]

http://www.photopost.com/photopost/data/500/171677MAX_Wallpapers_Beauties_0149_Eliza_Dushku.jp g ;)

[Silas Thorne]

oops, bigger than I thought! oh well! ;)

[Scheherazade]

oops, bigger than I thought! oh well! ;)Yeah, she starred in "Attack of the 50 Foot Woman"?

;)

[Silas Thorne]

oh, but sometimes bigger is better! LOL

[Scheherazade]

oh, but sometimes bigger is better! LOLYou mean size matters?

[Silas Thorne]

sometimes, was what I said. ;)

[Virgil]

hahaah...is that a play on words, Virgil? Like I don't know by now how you think. :lol:

I didn't intend it that way but now that you mention it. ;)

I think we can separate the men from the ladies by urinal. :D

http://www.icbe.org/blog/wp-content/images/busch_urinals.jpg

[higley]

I dunno Virg, that bathroom looks suspiciously clean. ;)

[Virgil]

I dunno Virg, that bathroom looks suspiciously clean. ;)

Women cleaning ladies. :p

[skib]

Or men peeing outside like they're supposed to.

[Janine]

Women cleaning ladies. :p

:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:!!!!! ........:lol: I am peeing my pants!

[skib]

Hammers are of limited interest to most people, even men, can't we get back to the booze and women ? The two most important things in a man's life.

I dunno . . . there was a point where my hammer was my livelihood.
14 oz Titanium Stilletto, and it cost me a pretty penny.

[*Classic*Charm*]

I dunno . . . there was a point where my hammer was my livelihood.
14 oz Titanium Stilletto, and it cost me a pretty penny.

Isn't it interesting that your hammer is named after a woman's shoe...:idea:

[skib]

Hmm . . . which came first, the hammer or the shoe? ;)

[*Classic*Charm*]

Hmm . . . which came first, the hammer or the shoe? ;)

This is a stilletto
http://img217.imageshack.us/img217/5237/hellgoldrh2.jpg

[Silas Thorne]

It's still a bloody shoe, however you look at it, it just doesn't function well as one. A hammer does its job well though. :)

[Janine]

This is a stilletto
http://img217.imageshack.us/img217/5237/hellgoldrh2.jpg

*Classic*, do you remember the song.....

"These stilettos are made for walking and that's just what they'll do; one of these days these stilettos will walk all over you!"

...or was it boots??? :confused:

[Silas Thorne]

boots. I don't think a woman in stillettos could move fast enough to do it. ;) ...unless you're the sort of person that keeps tripping over when zombies are chasing after you.

[skib]

I would really rather nobody walked on me at all, especially if there's zombies about!

[Silas Thorne]

I just meant boots are made for walking, not stilettos. :) It's easy to run away from people who are wearing stilettos if you are not, unless you're drunk, or keep tripping over.

[*Classic*Charm*]

boots. I don't think a woman in stillettos could move fast enough to do it. ;) ...unless you're the sort of person that keeps tripping over when zombies are chasing after you.

It was Boots, Janine.

HA! Come on Silas, are you telling me you've never seen a woman run in stillettos? I can run in stellettos and manage to stay on my feet!

[Silas Thorne]

can you run on cobblestones, or bumpy ground, though? ;) You'll break off the heels.

A hammer is has that manly sense of functionality and goodness about it. Rugged and does the job well. :)

[*Classic*Charm*]

can you run on cobblestones, or bumpy ground, though? ;) You'll break off the heels.

A hammer is has that manly sense of functionality and goodness about it. Rugged and does the job well. :)


The first time I wore heels, I ended up walking the cobble streets of Old Quebec city for three hours. No broken heels! :D

http://www.ngphotos.com/Morning%20light,%20Old%20Quebec%20City.jpg

And let's face it, Silas, as functional as it may be, there's just nothing attractive about your hammer :D

[Janine]

can you run on cobblestones, or bumpy ground, though? ;) You'll break off the heels.

A hammer is has that manly sense of functionality and goodness about it. Rugged and does the job well. :)

Personally I prefer a nice manly screwdriver.

[BienvenuJDC]

Forrest: Momma always says there's an awful lot you could tell about a person by their shoes. Where they're going. Where they've been. I've worn lots of shoes.

http://www.cinemablend.com/images/news_img/4626/4626.jpg

[skib]

The first time I wore heels, I ended up walking the cobble streets of Old Quebec city for three hours. No broken heels! :D

http://www.ngphotos.com/Morning%20light,%20Old%20Quebec%20City.jpg

And let's face it, Silas, as functional as it may be, there's just nothing attractive about your hammer :D

I can't help but think of the scene in Romancing the Stone, where the lady is having trouble walking (in her stilettos,) so the guy pushes her over, yanks the shoes off and hacks off the heels with his machete. :lol: Priceless!

Who said anything about needing an attractive hammer?!?!? I don't know about yall, but my hammer is a chick magnet. There was this one time, where the lady contractor noticed my hammer. . .:p

[BienvenuJDC]

Hmmm...one thought comes to mind...

Hammer...Payback (Mel Gibson)...need for proper footwear...

New thought comes to mind...Celebrity Death Match

Hammer vs. Stilettos

[Janine]

I can't help but think of the scene in Romancing the Stone, where the lady is having trouble walking (in her stilettos,) so the guy pushes her over, yanks the shoes off and hacks off the heels with his machete. :lol: Priceless!

I saw that movie. It was a riot and that scene is classic!:lol:


Who said anything about needing an attractive hammer?!?!? I don't know about yall, but my hammer is a chick magnet. There was this one time, where the lady contractor noticed my hammer. . .:p

I saw that in a Nick Nolte movie, too. He played Lucky and man, women really went wild over his hammer. He had a very nice hammer and cool tool belt as well.

[skib]

I saw that movie. It was a riot and that scene is classic!:lol:



I saw that in a Nick Nolte movie, too. He played Lucky and man, women really went wild over his hammer. He had a very nice hammer and cool tool belt as well.

Darn! Here I am thinking I'm being original!

Bien, I think you're right. I'm going to arrange a death match here soon.

[*Classic*Charm*]

Darn! Here I am thinking I'm being original!

Bien, I think you're right. I'm going to arrange a death match here soon.

Don't worry Skib, my stilletto heel will go easy on your flimsy old hammer!:p

[skib]

SSSHH! Let it think it might have a chance!

[The Atheist]

Women cleaning ladies. :p

:lol::lol::lol:

Nice!


Isn't it interesting that your hammer is named after a woman's shoe...:idea:

Actually, your shoe is named after a weapon, and since all weapons were invented by men (except for psychological weapons, which were invented by women), it's a manly thing.

I'm pretty sure women wear stiletto shoes to impress men rather than for comfort.

And just to get back onto more manly things, here's a fish.

This is a hapuku, to give it it's NZ name, better known overseas as a grouper.

Delicious, white, meaty steaks - cook 'em in tinfoil, seasoned with lemon & herbs.

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/IMG_1313.jpg

[Emil Miller]

Hey Fellas!

Can't you see what's happening? The women have invaded this thread and have got us talking about stilleto heels, soon it will be lipstick and hair dyes until eventually thay have taken the Bloke's thread over. Would it not be be better if we warned them off with a " No girls allowed" addition to the thread's title? Of course we want to talk about women, among other things, but do we want to put up with them talking?

[Mathor]

The first time I wore heels, I ended up walking the cobble streets of Old Quebec city for three hours. No broken heels! :D

http://www.ngphotos.com/Morning%20light,%20Old%20Quebec%20City.jpg



:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

[The Comedian]

Hello Blokes,

Just wanted to post a couple of things here. The first image (below) is of my fish mount (a 4lb brook trout), which is in my pine-paneled reading room.


http://i326.photobucket.com/albums/k431/ssteter/Thefish.jpg

Beauty isn't she? She fell for the oldest trick in the book: a worm on a hook.

So long, I'm off to smoke a cigar.

:)

[The Atheist]

Hey Fellas!

Can't you see what's happening? The women have invaded this thread and have got us talking about stilleto heels, soon it will be lipstick and hair dyes until eventually thay have taken the Bloke's thread over. Would it not be be better if we warned them off with a " No girls allowed" addition to the thread's title? Of course we want to talk about women, among other things, but do we want to put up with them talking?

That's what I've been saying - we come in here to escape them

I think we should be ok now - Scheherazade's got them sorted out.


Hello Blokes,

Just wanted to post a couple of things here. The first image (below) is of my fish mount (a 4lb brook trout), which is in my pine-paneled reading room.

Beauty isn't she? She fell for the oldest trick in the book: a worm on a hook.

So long, I'm off to smoke a cigar.

:)

Bravo!

[BienvenuJDC]

And just to get back onto more manly things, here's a fish.

This is a hapuku, to give it it's NZ name, better known overseas as a grouper.

Delicious, white, meaty steaks - cook 'em in tinfoil, seasoned with lemon & herbs.


If we're going to go in that direction...let's bring in the grill too...

http://secure.environmentaldefense.org/content_Images/Fish_grilled_2.jpg :brow:

[skib]

I'm grilling my lunch right now. :nod:

[BienvenuJDC]

Let's talk marinades and meats!!!!!!!!

http://www.askthemeatman.com/images/new_beef_chart_poster.jpg

Any preferences in cuts or marinades?

http://www.gis.net/~denauc/images/marinades.jpg

**guttural grunt**

[Virgil]

Bienvenu - That is a great idea. I have yet to fire up the grill this spring. Perhaps this weekend. :)

[Silas Thorne]

Barbeques! Yes, let's stand around and cook meat. Anyone for lamb chops? Or venison sausages?

[Janine]

Yes, I will have a filet mignon, please....eeekkk.....high maintance women!.....:lol:

[Silas Thorne]

Who let this woman near the barbie? :) This is a man's cooking place.

[BienvenuJDC]

I'd go out and fire mine up right now... I am ashamed to say that I allowed a travesty to happen...I let my wife grill the hamburgers this past weekend and when she was done, she left the propane burning...and now there's none left. But we will get it filled soon...

And this time we'll leaving the Grilling to the MEN!!!!

[The Atheist]

If we're going to go in that direction...let's bring in the grill too...

Looks great!


Let's talk marinades and meats!!!!!!!!

Any preferences in cuts or marinades?

Fillet steak. I make my own marinade from red wine, Worcestershire sauce, soy sauce, garlic and a secret blend of home-grown herbs.

People have killed for my steaks.

Other people have been killed by them! (They are not well cooked)


Bienvenu - That is a great idea. I have yet to fire up the grill this spring. Perhaps this weekend. :)

Autimn here, almost time to pack it away for the winter.


Barbeques! Yes, let's stand around and cook meat. Anyone for lamb chops? Or venison sausages?

You can keep the lamb chops, but some marinated rump fillets of lamb are good. Venison, anytime!


I'd go out and fire mine up right now... I am ashamed to say that I allowed a travesty to happen...I let my wife grill the hamburgers this past weekend and when she was done, she left the propane burning...and now there's none left.

Your punishment shall be to self-flagellate for 30 minutes.

[BienvenuJDC]

Autumn here, almost time to pack it away for the winter.



Atheist...you are about to commit a cardinal sin! I have grilled in rain, and sleet, and dark of night!!!

Quoting from the Cold Ale Bloke's Bible...
The book of Testosteronicus chapter five, "Thou shalt burn the altar of Bar-B all us your days. Thou shalt burn upon it the legs of lamb. Thou shalt burn upon it the fillet of Mignon. Thou shalt burn upon it venison of the woods. Thou shalt burn upon it the creatures of the sea, the birds of the air, and all creeping things that roam the earth. Thou shalt rub on them the herbs of the field. And the embers of the altar shall be a perpetual reminder that you are a MAN!"

[Janine]

Who let this woman near the barbie? :) This is a man's cooking place.

Yes, and MEN were the first ones to rub sticks together to produce fire!

Ah, men and their marinades! :lol:

[The Atheist]

Atheist...you are about to commit a cardinal sin! I have grilled in rain, and sleet, and dark of night!!!

Ha. Come and live in Auckland and tell me that! It was Auckland rain that started the Noah myth. 40 days and 40 nights is nothing.

[BienvenuJDC]

Ha. Come and live in Auckland and tell me that! It was Auckland rain that started the Noah myth. 40 days and 40 nights is nothing.

Gopher wood man! Build a boat!!!!:smash:

[Silas Thorne]

'It was Auckland rain that started the Noah myth. 40 days and 40 nights is nothing.'

Baah! Don't talk to me about Auckland rain! :) Nothing compared to the West Coast of the South Island! West Coasters don't need to use taps for water, they just walk outside and open their mouths, but not more than 5 seconds mind, otherwise their lungs will fill up and they'll drown.

[skib]

yeah? Well . . . while we're boasting about our manly state of living, here in Colorado, we're lucky to see water once a year! We can go a whole year without seeing a single drop of rain!
wow. that really sounds kind of pathetic, now that I think about it. :(

[Janine]

This thread is getting a little damp.

[Silas Thorne]

jack daniels replaces the need for water then? ;)

[skib]

Yes! Ever played the game "Whiskeysize me?"
That's what we do when everything else dries up.

[The Atheist]

Nothing compared to the West Coast of the South Island!

Nobody lives there!

[Emil Miller]

I know an Englishman who told me that when he was in Singapore, he just couldn't stop looking at the oriental girls when he was out with his wife, who kept reprimanding him for it.
Therefore, and this is strictly for the blokes, should men be allowed to look at other women without having to suffer a rebuke from their partners whether married or otherwise?

[The Atheist]

I know an Englishman who told me that when he was in Singapore, he just couldn't stop looking at the oriental girls when he was out with his wife, who kept reprimanding him for it.
Therefore, and this is strictly for the blokes, should men be allowed to look at other women without having to suffer a rebuke from their partners whether married or otherwise?

Good question, to which the answer is a conditional yes.

My wife gives me a nudge when she thinks I might have missed a tasty blonde, so she has no problem with it. Window-shopping is fine.

I think it all depends on the strength of the relationship, because I'm sure that if Mrs Atheist thought I might go and buy some of the goods on display, she wouldn't be quite so relaxed about the window-shopping.

Another thing which comes into it is figure. Men tend to check out the types of figures on display in this thread, while many wives and mothers no longer have that kind of figure. I can understand a somewhat chubby wife with body/self esteem issues being pretty upset by hubby checking out a load of skinny chicks.

Not as cut and dried as it should be.

[BienvenuJDC]

I agree with Atheist about the strength of the relationship. When I married Mrs Bien, she'd been through two unfaithful relationships (meaning both guys were cheaters). I had to establish trustworthiness in me so that she knew I was TRUE. Now she knows that I won't wander.

But also...are we glancing from the peripheral, looking respectfully, staring intently, ogling T&A, whiplash double-take, tongue hanging/drooling, or sampling? ;):blush::redface::nod::eek2::brow::banana:

Some people might find some of those choices distasteful...and unfortunately some people wouldn't...

Again...I agree with Atheist (which I'm going to have to stop doing) concerning the confidence level of a woman. If a man let's his wife know that he thinks that she is beautiful (not only saying it, but acting it too), she will be less likely be put out by respectful glances. My wife's uncle will comment about a woman's beauty (usually on TV) then qualify the statement with a compliment to his wife's appearance. Men...you can honestly say..."That girl is attractive, but not nearly as beautiful as you, Hun!"...because you know the inner beauty of your wife. I don't think that there is anything wrong with admiring beauty...whether created by an artist...or by God.

[Emil Miller]

My wife's uncle will comment about a woman's beauty (usually on TV) then qualify the statement with a compliment to his wife's appearance. Men...you can honestly say..."That girl is attractive, but not nearly as beautiful as you, Hun!"...because you know the inner beauty of your wife. .

Or is it because they don't want, to use a rather indelicate American phrase, a 'smack in the kisser?'

[BienvenuJDC]

Or is it because they don't want, to use a rather indelicate American phrase, a 'smack in the kisser?'

No...I think it's that they don't want the 'cold shoulder'...and the ATTITUDE...

[skib]

Rather happily not married, so I don't worry about it. :)

Though, if I were, I would have to agree to Mr. Athiest as well. My mother and father both look at attractive women out in public, and my mother will point one out to my father, who in turn will direct my own single-oriented eyes.

[mono]

Wow, this thread has gone a long way! :D


I dunno Virg, that bathroom looks suspiciously clean.Women cleaning ladies.
:lol::lol:

I know an Englishman who told me that when he was in Singapore, he just couldn't stop looking at the oriental girls when he was out with his wife, who kept reprimanding him for it.
Therefore, and this is strictly for the blokes, should men be allowed to look at other women without having to suffer a rebuke from their partners whether married or otherwise?

Good question, to which the answer is a conditional yes.

My wife gives me a nudge when she thinks I might have missed a tasty blonde, so she has no problem with it. Window-shopping is fine.

I think it all depends on the strength of the relationship, because I'm sure that if Mrs Atheist thought I might go and buy some of the goods on display, she wouldn't be quite so relaxed about the window-shopping.

Another thing which comes into it is figure. Men tend to check out the types of figures on display in this thread, while many wives and mothers no longer have that kind of figure. I can understand a somewhat chubby wife with body/self esteem issues being pretty upset by hubby checking out a load of skinny chicks.

Not as cut and dried as it should be.
I mostly agree with Atheist, and know too well the instinctive drive to "window shop," but hold true to the look-but-don't-touch rule - also not to look too much or too often. Taking the situation the other way around, I do not feel in the least offended in a girlfriend of mine checking out other men, nor even if she nudges me playfully and says "he has a nice @$$!" As long as she holds true to the look-but-don't-touch-rule, I do not mind in the least. Most humans have the ability to suppress their natural sexual appetites, and I would like to think I would never date someone who could not (but have gotten deceived a time or two); if they cannot suppress their desire to play on the field, then obviously they seem unready for or unhappy in a relationship.
We have more or less appropriate things to note. If you note that another woman has beautiful eyes and remark that to your girlfriend/wife, somehow it seems so much more acceptable than noticing that the other woman also wears a thin t-shirt, and evidently feels awfully cold; I would likely comment on that, too, in a joking manner, so she can share a laugh with me.

[Virgil]

I window shop too, but my wife doesn't particularly like it. So I have to do it out of the corner of my eye. :D Oh and for the record, I only look.

[The Atheist]

Again...I agree with Atheist (which I'm going to have to stop doing) ...

Crikey, yes!

There are parts of the internet agreeing with me will get you much worse than the cold shoulder!

:D


Wow, this thread has gone a long way! :D

See how easy it is when a few blokes chew the fat without women listening?


Taking the situation the other way around, I do not feel in the least offended in a girlfriend of mine checking out other men, nor even if she nudges me playfully and says "he has a nice @$$!" As long as she holds true to the look-but-don't-touch-rule, I do not mind in the least.

Hell yes - goose/gander and all that. Can't stand jealousy.

I know men who would commit an assault on someone indulging in admiration of "his" woman. Some of them are already in jail. That's one area of man-dom (does that sound like a bdsm come-on or what? :D) which needs some serious damage control - women are not chattels. Unfortunately, lots of blokes don't know that.

[Silas Thorne]

See how easy it is when a few blokes chew the fat without women listening?

I don't think this is happening though. :) They're always in the background, watching our movements.... We can only pretend they're not here. Look! I saw one hiding in the bushes over by the fence, trying to sneak over near the barbie. :D Ninjas! (looking around) They're everywhere! Quickly get out your hammers, I'm sure someone's going to jump over the fence wielding stillettos!



I know men who would commit an assault on someone indulging in admiration of "his" woman. Some of them are already in jail. That's one area of man-dom (does that sound like a bdsm come-on or what? :D) which needs some serious damage control - women are not chattels. Unfortunately, lots of blokes don't know that.

Yes, I hate these idiots!
And there are, unfortunately, a few women (the dangerous minority) who try to get men to dance with them at nightclubs, or actively seek attention, precisely because they have boyfriends like this, and want to make them jealous.

[Janine]

don't think this is happening though. They're always in the background, watching our movements.... We can only pretend they're not here. Look! I saw one hiding in the bushes over by the fence, trying to sneak over near the barbie. Ninjas! (looking around) They're everywhere! Quickly get out your hammers, I'm sure someone's going to jump over the fence wielding stillettos!

Yes, indeed; better get out those hammers! :lol:

All us females have been reading your posts.

This thread is most enlightening.

[Virgil]

Yes, indeed; better get out those hammers! :lol:

All us females have been reading your posts.

This thread is most enlightening.

:lol: Uh oh. They are on to me. :D

[Silas Thorne]

I looked at the women's thread and they were talking about handbags. It didn't seem that interesting to me. Why are we men so interesting to women? ;)

[Janine]

All us females have been reading your posts.

yes, but 'all your base are belong to us!' :)

What say? don't get that, sorry something lost in the translation....:confused:


uh um, Virgil, ;) definitely....like I said 'enlightening' in here. I bet a lot of you guy's who are married or have girlfriends have eyes that don't quite match by now, since one eye wanders. :goof:


I looked at the women's thread and they were talking about handbags. It didn't seem that interesting to me. Why are we men so interesting to women? ;)

Silas, some men carry handbags!

Answer to question: because you guys are so incredibly laughable!

[Emil Miller]

No...I think it's that they don't want the 'cold shoulder'...and the ATTITUDE...

Come to think of it you are absolutely right and recalls an incident that I had forgotten about.
An English friend of mine was working in Oslo and, like virtually all of the other foreign contract workers at the company that hired him, he had a girl friend, even though though practically all of them were married and living away from their respective countries. Every six weeks his wife would travel to Norway to stay for a week and the girlfriend, naturally, had to disappear from the scene during that time. On one occasion, the day before his wife was due, his girlfriend said that she couldn't find one of her earings and they searched the bed for a long time but were unable to find it. Needless to say, the day after her arrival, his wife found it while making the bed; he told me that she didn't speak to him for the whole time she was there.

[prendrelemick]

The missus, not talking for a week, sounds like bliss ;)

[BienvenuJDC]

Silas, some men carry handbags!


Those ones aren't men...:lol:

Unless the handbag contains black powder accessories...
http://www.biggamehunt.net/graphics/photos_talltales/m_hungle_muzzleloader5.jpg

[Carrolb2]

I have a hand bag. It's filled with chalk (for climbing) and super glue (for first aid)

[BienvenuJDC]

I have a hand bag. It's filled with chalk (for climbing) and super glue (for first aid)

Now we're talkin'...
I guess handbags aren't that bad...it depends what's in it...

:cool:
What's in YOUR handbag?

[Emil Miller]

I have a hand bag. It's filled with chalk (for climbing) and super glue (for first aid)

Your name seems to indicate a woman, although I know that Carrol can sometimes be used by men but I am intrigued to know why chalk is used in climbing; I'm not sure about the superglue either.

[LostPrincess13]

*wears dark cloak, peeks in the room, and glides quietly towards a table in the corner*
*orders a beer from the waiter, careful not to let him see her face*
*sips the beer, and giggles to herself as she listens in to the conversations*

[BienvenuJDC]

I think that superglue can mend any cuts...seals them right up...

I don't know if it works on a compound leg fracture though...


*wears dark cloak, peeks in the room, and glides quietly towards a table in the corner*
*orders a beer from the waiter, careful not to let him see her face*
*sips the beer, and giggles to herself as she listens in to the conversations*

Did anybody check to see if this girl is old enough to be drinking a beer?:D

[LostPrincess13]

Did anybody check to see if this girl is old enough to be drinking a beer?:D

Hey!:p I'm seventeen!:p That's old enough...:blush:

[BienvenuJDC]

Hey!:p I'm seventeen!:p That's old enough...:blush:

I'm not gong to say a thing then...I've never even had one myself!

[LostPrincess13]

Then pull up a chair then and take a swig matey!:lol:

[Emil Miller]

We must protect this masculine preserve from these pesky women....especially the young and pretty ones who will put our resolve to the test.

[LostPrincess13]

Can I stay if I say my purpose is merely academic?;) I'm doing research on the male species.:D

[Emil Miller]

Can I stay if I say my purpose is merely academic?;) I'm doing research on the male species.:D

All women do that and start long before they are 17.

[BienvenuJDC]

Maybe she can stay if she cleans the bathrooms...and sweeps the floors...

[Emil Miller]

Maybe she can stay if she cleans the bathrooms...and sweeps the floors...

But don't you think it's unwise to let a 17-year-old hang around with a bunch of older guys? She might hear a few things that will offend her delicate ears.

[BienvenuJDC]

But don't you think it's unwise to let a 17-year-old hang around with a bunch of older guys? She might hear a few things that will offend her delicate ears.

She might even say something that could offend my delicate ears...:blush:
...kids these days...:lol:

[prendrelemick]

"Pint o Newkie and a bag of pork scratchin's, please darlin'." (I assume barmaids are exception to no women rule.)

Walks over to juke box, chooses Paranoid, by Black Sabbath.

[The Atheist]

I don't think this is happening though. :) They're always in the background, watching our movements.... We can only pretend they're not here. Look! I saw one hiding in the bushes over by the fence, trying to sneak over near the barbie. :D Ninjas! (looking around) They're everywhere! Quickly get out your hammers, I'm sure someone's going to jump over the fence wielding stillettos!

Actually, the chicks hunkering down on the sidelines doesn't matter in here - somehow, we've created the perfect blokes' room.

See those old oak panels beside the library? Women used to hide behind those and listen through the cracks in the late 1800s.

Little good it did them - whatever they heard, saw or smelt, there was nothing they could do, because what happens in the Blokes' Club, stays in the Blokes' Club and if some demure wee thing was silly enough to admit she'd been caught eavesdropping on gentlemen*, it would have been akin to Queen Victoria admitting to having taken seven of her footmen as lovers at the same time.

These days, the social penury may not be to those lengths, but any Real Woman [TM] would certainly think little of her sister who stooped to such depths.

The cigar smoke always gets them in the end.

;)

*I am referring to gentlemen members of that past - while I am in no position to comment on whether any other participants fit the description, I most certainly, do not.


Yes, I hate these idiots!
And there are, unfortunately, a few women (the dangerous minority) who try to get men to dance with them at nightclubs, or actively seek attention, precisely because they have boyfriends like this, and want to make them jealous.

Yep, some women, are turned on by violence and possessiveness, but luckily, very few.


Yes, indeed; better get out those hammers! :lol:

All us females have been reading your posts.

This thread is most enlightening.

See above.


I looked at the women's thread and they were talking about handbags.

:)

Proof!


It didn't seem that interesting to me. Why are we men so interesting to women? ;)

Not that hard to tell in the end, is it?


We must protect this masculine preserve from these pesky women....especially the young and pretty ones who will put our resolve to the test.

Perish the thought.

Just treat them exactly as one would the soft sounds of the string quartet in the far corner by the fire.


Maybe she can stay if she cleans the bathrooms...and sweeps the floors...

There isn't an emoticon here to describe how I exploded with laughter at that!

Classic.

And spit-polish my shoes!

:lol::lol::lol::lol:

[Emil Miller]

(I assume barmaids are exception to no women rule.) .


Well if there has to be an exception it's gotta be barmaids. They're among my favourite people.

[Carrolb2]

Your name seems to indicate a woman, although I know that Carrol can sometimes be used by men but I am intrigued to know why chalk is used in climbing; I'm not sure about the superglue either.

Carroll = last name
chalk keeps your hands dry. trying to hold on for dear life is a little hard when your hands are sweaty. and super glue is the best first aid development since the band aid. its like stitches only faster, cheaper, stronger, and it leaves better (and more manly) battle scars.

[The Atheist]

"Pint o Newkie and a bag of pork scratchin's, please darlin'." (I assume barmaids are exception to no women rule.)

You would, alas, assume wrong.

Parker, our commissionaire, is well-versed in the recruitment needs of this establishment and we are presently in no need of new staff members. Our last staff member hired was Johnson, the porter, and that was in 1968.

His son has been in training to take over from him later this year, in fact.

In future, please discuss all matters pertaining to the club and employment matters with Mr Parker. His details are here (http://charman.co.nz/The%20BlokesClub.htm).


Walks over to juke box, chooses Paranoid, by Black Sabbath.

Juke box?

I have heard the term, I'm sure.

Isn't that Mozart's Prussian Quartet k575 I can hear?

[Emil Miller]

Juke box?

I have heard the term, I'm sure.

Isn't that Mozart's Prussian Quartet k575 I can hear?



I am desperate to get hold of a copy of Black Sabbath playing Mozart's Prussian Quartet k575 can anyone help?

[The Atheist]

I am desperate to get hold of a copy of Black Sabbath playing Mozart's Prussian Quartet k575 can anyone help?

:lol:

I can just see Ozzy Osbourne's hair getting tangled in his cello.

[prendrelemick]

"Pint o Newkie and a bag of pork scratchin's, please darlin'." (I assume barmaids are exception to no women rule.)

Walks over to juke box, chooses Paranoid, by Black Sabbath.Ok, ok I get it.

"Whisky with a splash of water please Johnson."

walks over to humador, chooses cuban cigar. sits in leather wing-back by fire.

[Emil Miller]

Carroll = last name
chalk keeps your hands dry. trying to hold on for dear life is a little hard when your hands are sweaty. and super glue is the best first aid development since the band aid. its like stitches only faster, cheaper, stronger, and it leaves better (and more manly) battle scars.

Thanks for the explanation. Do you go mountaineering to get away from the women or do any of them accompany you on your sweaty-palmed scaling of the heights?

[BienvenuJDC]

What's grillin' tonight?

[Emil Miller]

What's grillin' tonight?

Well it's already well into nightime now so I am finishing off with one packet of Prawn cocktail potato chips and one ridge cut cheddar and onion accompanied by two cans of Tennant's Super strong lager and one of Miller Light to soften the blow. You know, the male atmosphere in this club is so congenial I think I will move in permanently.

[The Atheist]

Ok, ok I get it.

"Whisky with a splash of water please Johnson."

walks over to humador, chooses cuban cigar. sits in leather wing-back by fire.

Thank you.


What's grillin' tonight?

Ah, you American chaps and your trans-Atlantic humour!

Parker was mentioning only last week, the time one of your cousins was in the club and asked for something grilled. Sir Nigel was desperate to whip him off to the side room for a proper grilling, but Parker explained that it was a form of cooking used in former colonies rather than a request for de-briefing.

Parker will be pleased to have one of the footmen service your epicurean requests.

[BienvenuJDC]

Are any of you familiar with Cajun style food?

[skib]

Aah, yes! A good friend of mine from Louisiana is Cajun, and he is one of the best cooks I know! Fresh everything, bought on the dock that same day.

[BienvenuJDC]

Forget the prawns...give me a bucket of crayfish!!!

[skib]

. . . sure! I'm certainly no expert on Cajun cooking. Unless we can count eating it. Names? Bah! not necessary.

[Emil Miller]

Thank you.



Ah, you American chaps and your trans-Atlantic humour!

Parker was mentioning only last week, the time one of your cousins was in the club and asked for something grilled. Sir Nigel was desperate to whip him off to the side room for a proper grilling, but Parker explained that it was a form of cooking used in former colonies rather than a request for de-briefing.

Parker will be pleased to have one of the footmen service your epicurean requests.

We must be careful not to alienate our American male members who might be more inclined to a 1920s speakeasy environment than an 1890s gentlemen's club in London. After all, there is a great difference between Blackjack and Poker and Bridge or Whist. Now don't get me wrong, I happen to think that the Gentlemen's club is comensurate with the invention of the wheel but, in the era of the internet, we must be prepared to broaden the scope of the Bloke's domain to include men from all parts of the globe.

[kilted exile]

We must be careful not to alienate our American male members who might be more inclined to a 1920s speakeasy environment than an 1890s gentlemen's club in London. After all, there is a great difference between Blackjack and Poker and Bridge or Whist. Now don't get me wrong, I happen to think that the Gentlemen's club is comensurate with the invention of the wheel but, in the era of the internet, we must be prepared to broaden the scope of the Bloke's domain to include men from all parts of the globe.

This blokes domain used to dingy bars in areas of glasgow you wouldnt let your dog go let alone a relative - I think we can safely exclude that domain

[BienvenuJDC]

Atheist...if you are from NZ...wouldn't it be more proper to say trans-Pacific humor...and what kind of humor is that exactly?

[papayahed]

Are any of you familiar with Cajun style food?


blech!

[Mathor]

We must be careful not to alienate our American male members who might be more inclined to a 1920s speakeasy environment than an 1890s gentlemen's club in London. After all, there is a great difference between Blackjack and Poker and Bridge or Whist. Now don't get me wrong, I happen to think that the Gentlemen's club is comensurate with the invention of the wheel but, in the era of the internet, we must be prepared to broaden the scope of the Bloke's domain to include men from all parts of the globe.

:lol::lol:

<alienated American

My stepdad has only lived here in America for 4 years (London-area born and raised), and when he goes back for christmas he always brings me back Prawn Cocktail Chips (Crisps), they are frikkin amazing. (as disgusting as that sounds).

[kilted exile]

Atheist...if you are from NZ...wouldn't it be more proper to say trans-Pacific humor...and what kind of humor is that exactly?

nah its not trans pacific because the UK is still the centre of the universe, everything still has to pass through here first

[Emil Miller]

This blokes domain used to dingy bars in areas of glasgow you wouldnt let your dog go let alone a relative - I think we can safely exclude that domain

The tales of the terribleness of some Glasgow pubs is legendary and, as someone who has experienced them personally, you are in a position of being able to underline just how bad they are. But how do you feel about belonging to a male preserve that has leather armchairs and Mozart being played by a string quartet?

[kilted exile]

how do you feel about belonging to a male preserve that has leather armchairs and Mozart being played by a string quartet?

Probably distinctly underdressed:lol:

[Virgil]

Come to think of it you are absolutely right and recalls an incident that I had forgotten about.
An English friend of mine was working in Oslo and, like virtually all of the other foreign contract workers at the company that hired him, he had a girl friend, even though though practically all of them were married and living away from their respective countries. Every six weeks his wife would travel to Norway to stay for a week and the girlfriend, naturally, had to disappear from the scene during that time. On one occasion, the day before his wife was due, his girlfriend said that she couldn't find one of her earings and they searched the bed for a long time but were unable to find it. Needless to say, the day after her arrival, his wife found it while making the bed; he told me that she didn't speak to him for the whole time she was there.
[/QUOTE]
Oh God. If that had been my wife that would have been the end of the marriage. I think he ought to consider himself lucky.

Reminds me of a story of a guy who was on continuous business travel for years. He would go back home every so often and every once in a while I would see him at the travel location. I would go every there for a week's time every other month or so, but he was there for like a month at a time. One day I cought up with him and he told me his marriage was on the ropes. I figured it was because he was away so often. It turns out the girl he was meeting up with on his travel got angry he broke up with her and mailed her bright red underwear to his wife with a note that said something like, "for old times sake." :lol: He had a lot of explaining to do.


Now we're talkin'...
I guess handbags aren't that bad...it depends what's in it...

:cool:
What's in YOUR handbag?
Lipstick and powder? :p


Maybe she can stay if she cleans the bathrooms...and sweeps the floors...
:lol::lol:


What's grillin' tonight?
Actually the wife is cooking. And complaining. I forgot to take the garbage out last night and she was pissed. She actually sent me an email to work. :D


This blokes domain used to dingy bars in areas of glasgow you wouldnt let your dog go let alone a relative - I think we can safely exclude that domain
Would have been interesting. I can keep my nose clean but I would probably need a local to be with. ;)

[LostPrincess13]

All women do that and start long before they are 17.

LOL!:lol: Then again, I'm no ordinary 17 year old girl.;) Let's just say I was 'one of the guys' when I was younger.:D In fact, I still think I am!:lol:


Maybe she can stay if she cleans the bathrooms...and sweeps the floors...

:lol: Sorry, I don't do bathrooms.:lol: I could serve you guys beverages though.;) I make pretty good coffee.:D


But don't you think it's unwise to let a 17-year-old hang around with a bunch of older guys? She might hear a few things that will offend her delicate ears.

I'm a big girl now!:D And I'm sure whatever you guys say I've heard it before and will come as no surprise to me.:D


She might even say something that could offend my delicate ears...:blush:
...kids these days...:lol:

Oooh!:D What could I possibly say I wonder?;)

[The Atheist]

We must be careful not to alienate our American male members who might be more inclined to a 1920s speakeasy environment than an 1890s gentlemen's club in London. After all, there is a great difference between Blackjack and Poker and Bridge or Whist. Now don't get me wrong, I happen to think that the Gentlemen's club is comensurate with the invention of the wheel but, in the era of the internet, we must be prepared to broaden the scope of the Bloke's domain to include men from all parts of the globe.

Maybe we could have the West Louge done out in 1920s speakeasy. I'm a big fan of women's fashion from that time - a touch of class with a touch of hooker. Perfect!


This blokes domain used to dingy bars in areas of glasgow you wouldnt let your dog go let alone a relative - I think we can safely exclude that domain

I'll bet you a Glasgy pub against Otara's Flying Jug any day.

:D


Atheist...if you are from NZ...wouldn't it be more proper to say trans-Pacific humor...and what kind of humor is that exactly?

No, definitely trans-Atlantic. The club is based in London as the centre of the "Old World". I know I'm mixing South Pacific, East London and Harrow idiom, but you'll catch up.


LOL!:lol: Then again, I'm no ordinary 17 year old girl.;)

Clearly not!

[LostPrincess13]

Well hello Mr. Atheist!:D I hope you don't mind my lil intrusion in your thread.:D My curiosity got the best of me, and I just couldn't help myself.:D

[Silas Thorne]

We can't stop you anyway. :) Those perimeter mines around the backyard barbeque area don't seem to be working properly.

[The Atheist]

Well hello Mr. Atheist!:D I hope you don't mind my lil intrusion in your thread.:D My curiosity got the best of me, and I just couldn't help myself.:D

No worries, you're perfectly welcome.

As long as you don't try to play any of that awful music someone mentioned earlier.

Well, it's been a fantastic day here - beautiful, warm autumn day. Took the kids fishing and caught a bucketload. Just right to relax by the fire now.

All will be perfect once those three fingers of Glenfiddich finds it way down my throat.


We can't stop you anyway. :) Those perimeter mines around the backyard barbeque area don't seem to be working properly.

I hear Parker is thinking about a moat with pirhanas.

[NikolaiI]

What about those of us who don't drink?

[LostPrincess13]

No worries, you're perfectly welcome.

As long as you don't try to play any of that awful music someone mentioned earlier.

Well, it's been a fantastic day here - beautiful, warm autumn day. Took the kids fishing and caught a bucketload. Just right to relax by the fire now.

All will be perfect once those three fingers of Glenfiddich finds it way down my throat.

Are you referring to Paranoid by the Black Sabbath? Never heard of it.;) Looks like you had a great day!:D I've never went fishing before. I here it's very relaxing.:) Who or what is a Glenfiddich?


We can't stop you anyway. :) Those perimeter mines around the backyard barbeque area don't seem to be working properly.


I hear Parker is thinking about a moat with pirhanas.


LOL!:lol: I suggest that you gentlemen abandon any further attempts to keep us out.:D Your efforts will only be futile.;) Women, as you all know, are VERY persistent and will do ANYTHING to get their way.;)

[The Atheist]

What about those of us who don't drink?

What are you, a cactus?

:D

You must drink something - water, tonic, fruit drinks... It's not essential to drink alcohol.


Who or what is a Glenfiddich?

Scotch whisky. Old blokes' drink.



Women, as you all know, are VERY persistent and will do ANYTHING to get their way.;)

You wish!

[Emil Miller]

What about those of us who don't drink?

Well we realise that, regretable though it is, there are some guys who don't drink but do you follow other traditional masculine pursuits such as smoking and sex? Not necessarily at the same time though.


Probably distinctly underdressed:lol:

Well you should be OK as long as you wear a shirt but you might have a bit of trouble getting in to a men only club if you are wearing a kilt.

[BienvenuJDC]

Would you happen to have a Sarsaparilla back there, Parker?

...and it's my opinion that the little lost princess adds some pleasant atmosphere...as long as you don't let too many of them in here!!

[LostPrincess13]

*bats eyelashes* :blush:

[Emil Miller]

Maybe we could have the West Louge done out in 1920s speakeasy.


Yeah that shoud keep the guys from the other side of the pond happy.
Maybe we could get some cheap booze from that bootlegger chap who keeps popping up in the General Literature forum. I can't remember his name off hand but it will come to me in due course old sport.

[Emil Miller]

[QUOTE=BienvenuJDC;706176]Would you happen to have a Sarsaparilla back there, Parker? QUOTE]

Carrying a handbag and drinking sarsaparilla could get you talked about.