Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

[Mathor]

Well we realise that, regretable though it is, there are some guys who don't drink but do you follow other traditional masculine pursuits such as smoking and sex? Not necessarily at the same time though.


:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

[Emil Miller]

QUOTE=Virgil;705975][/QUOTE] Actually the wife is cooking. And complaining. I forgot to take the garbage out last night and she was pissed. [/QUOTE]

You will have to hide the key to the drinks cabinet in future.

[The Atheist]

You will have to hide the key to the drinks cabinet in future.

:lol::lol:

There's that trans-Atlantic thing again.

I once asked a sick-looking Yankee mate if he was crook, only to be met by a blank stare. (That's more trans-Pacific, though)

Any suggestions for the online presence of the Club are welcome!

[Virgil]

You will have to hide the key to the drinks cabinet in future.

:D She doesn't drink. I've got the liquor cabinent to myself. :D

[BienvenuJDC]

Then I'll take coffee...black...leave the grounds in...

Can I hang by Black Powder satchel (not handbag) on the hook with my rifled muzzle loader?

[Silas Thorne]

Here's a poem by John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester:

The Imperfect Enjoyment


Naked she lay; clasped in my longing arms,
I filled with love, and she all over charms;
Both equally inspired with eager fire,
Melting through kindness in desire.
With arms, legs, lips close clinging to embrace,
She clips me to her breast, and sucks me to her face.
Her nimble tongue, Love's lesser lightning, played
Within my mouth, and to my thoughts conveyed
Swift orders that I should prepare to throw
The all-dissolving thunderbolt below....

I'll have to stop there, the rest is too rude perhaps for the forum. But feel free to read it, it's posted on the wall on the way to the games room:

http://www.english-gardening.com/poem/wilnot/john_wilnot_earl_of_rochester_the_imperfect_enjoym ent.htm

[The Comedian]

Just got back from the pub -- had a bacon cheeseburger, sweet potato fries, and cold ale.

[mono]

What about those of us who don't drink?
Ah, no worries, NikolaiI, we can keep a supply of non-alcoholic beer, sparkling cider, soda, coffee, and tea, too. We men ought to come here for a good time, and it does not always have to involve alcohol; in fact, seeing how quickly I down a beer or wine, I may join you for some drinks, NikolaiI, to sober-up as "chasers."

A serious question for the other men of LitNet: why do women insist upon going to the restroom together? I have always wondered if they have confession booths or pinball machines in there, instead of stalls. :confused:

[skib]

It is written somewhere in their genetic code, to travel in packs, especially to the bathroom where it is easier to gossip without fear of being overheard by males.

[Virgil]

It is written somewhere in their genetic code, to travel in packs, especially to the bathroom where it is easier to gossip without fear of being overheard by males.

:lol: Good point. I had a friend in school who claimed women were are secretly lesbians. :D Perhaps that should get edited.

[NikolaiI]

What are you, a cactus?

You must drink something - water, tonic, fruit drinks... It's not essential to drink alcohol.

Right. :) Nope I am not a cactus. I drink water, milk, v8 mainly... but I have a question which has been nagging me. What percentage water are humans? I always thought it was mid to high 90's, but someone else was saying it was lower.


Well we realise that, regretable though it is, there are some guys who don't drink but do you follow other traditional masculine pursuits such as smoking and sex? Not necessarily at the same time though.

Well, smoking? No, that is not really a good idea. And the other, that is personal. :)

[The Atheist]

Right. :) Nope I am not a cactus. I drink water, milk, v8 mainly... but I have a question which has been nagging me. What percentage water are humans? I always thought it was mid to high 90's, but someone else was saying it was lower.

Somewhere in the 70-80 range, I think. Lots anyway.


And just to get back to the Club's online presence, I listed it as a dot com, but it should be:

www.TheBlokesClub.info

Parker has been busy.

[NikolaiI]

Somewhere in the 70-80 range, I think. Lots anyway.

That makes more sense actually. :) Don't know why I thought it was 90s.

[BienvenuJDC]

I came in for a nightcap...

**walks over to the hat rack and pulls a cap off, puts it on his head**

[LostPrincess13]

A serious question for the other men of LitNet: why do women insist upon going to the restroom together? I have always wondered if they have confession booths or pinball machines in there, instead of stalls. :confused:


It is written somewhere in their genetic code, to travel in packs, especially to the bathroom where it is easier to gossip without fear of being overheard by males.

I can attest to that!:D It's girl code: Never let your friend go to the bathroom alone. :D And no, no pinball machines or confession booths.;) Just large mirrors that allow you to check your make up and your outfit.:D


Then I'll take coffee...black...leave the grounds in...

Can I hang by Black Powder satchel (not handbag) on the hook with my rifled muzzle loader?

Coming right up sir!:D *looks at rifle* Do you men still consider hunting as the ultimate sport?

[imthefoolonthehill]

I am wishing for some cold-ale, but in this college town, it is mom's weekend, so the bars are flooded with 40 year old divorcees looking for one night stands.... I think I'll stay in tonight.

[Janine]

It got a little too smokey in here for me....*irritated eyeballs*

[LostPrincess13]

Can I interest you in some coffee Ms. Janine?:)

[Lokasenna]

Smoking is fine, but only so long as its cigars or a (good quality) pipe - I can't stand cigarettes.

Also, I have recently succumbed to the inscrutable exhortations of my masculine soul... I have started shooting things. There is something peculiarly gratifying about stalking about one's own garden like a commando (humming a military tattoo under my breath, of course), taking pot-shots at vermin. The fact that I'm such an abysmal shot, and have yet to so much as wound anything doesn't put me off in the slightest...

[The Atheist]

Do you men still consider hunting as the ultimate sport?

Not the ultimate sport, by any means, but hunting is still a great sport. I don't like trophy hunting and confine my own killing to pests and food, which, if you can find rabbits, serves both uses.

I've tried bowhunting for deer, but so far, the deer have been untroubled by it. Very hard to get close enough for a decent shot.


I am wishing for some cold-ale, but in this college town, it is mom's weekend, so the bars are flooded with 40 year old divorcees looking for one night stands.... I think I'll stay in tonight.

Oh god - I tell my wife, if she croaks on me, I'd be a confirmed bachelor; if there's a hell on earth, it's middle-aged dating.


The fact that I'm such an abysmal shot, and have yet to so much as wound anything doesn't put me off in the slightest...

Sounds as though neither of us will be doing much ecological damage!

:D

[Emil Miller]

I am wishing for some cold-ale, but in this college town, it is mom's weekend, so the bars are flooded with 40 year old divorcees looking for one night stands.... I think I'll stay in tonight.

What's the name of that town again?




Smoking is fine, The fact that I'm such an abysmal shot, and have yet to so much as wound anything doesn't put me off in the slightest...

I had a similar problem when pigeons invaded the garden to eat the seed that fell from the seed containers put out for the smaller birds. I didn't want to kill them but just wing them to frighten them off, but I am such a poor shot that I actually killed two of them; I finally got a cat.



[QUOTE=Silas Thorne;706651]Here's a poem by John Wilmot, Earl of Rochester:


I'll have to stop there, the rest is too rude perhaps for the forum. But feel free to read it, it's posted on the wall on the way to the games room: QUOTE]


A great poem, I couldn't have put it better myself, but in deference to feminine sensibilties perhaps we ought to have something more anodyne on the reverse side that we could display whenever females hove into view on the horizon. How about:

She walks in beauty, like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies,
And all that's best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes
Thus mellowed to that tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.

One shade the more, one ray the less,
Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress,
Or softly lightens o'er her face,
Where thoughts serenely sweet express
How pure, how dear their dwelling place.

And on that cheek, and o'er that brow,
So soft, so calm, yet eloquent,
The smiles that win, the tints that glow,
But tell of days in goodness spent,
A mind at peace with all below,
A heart whose love is innocent!


Of course, it lacks a certain 'je ne sais quoi' in comparison but we can always return to basics when the women have gone.

[Silas Thorne]

Of course, it lacks a certain 'je ne sais quoi' in comparison but we can always return to basics when the women have gone.
:lol:

[prendrelemick]

Shooting isn't the ultimate sport. (That title goes to Rugby League, of course.) But it is a grand day out for us chaps.

Up at the crack of dawn, a nip of frost in the air, the labradors wimpering to be loosed from the Range Rover. The butler, dressed in his plus fours and deer stalker, carrying the Purdys. The smell of the beaters, the sound of the grouse cackleing amongst the heather. Ah role on the glorious Twelth.

[Emil Miller]

Shooting isn't the ultimate sport. (That title goes to Rugby League, of course.) But it is a grand day out for us chaps.

Up at the crack of dawn, a nip of frost in the air, the labradors wimpering to be loosed from the Range Rover. The butler dressed in his plus fours and deer stalker, carrying the Purdys. The smell of the beaters, the sound of the grouse cackleing amongst the heather. Ah role on the glorious Twelth.

And at the end of a perfect day's shooting we can repair to the club for a pint o newkie and a packet of pork scratchin's.

[BienvenuJDC]

Coming right up sir!:D *looks at rifle* Do you men still consider hunting as the ultimate sport?

Sport?!?!?! It's not a sport, deary... Where do ya' think that Parker got the meat for that Rabbit stew that yer eatin'? There's not a Wal-Mart in 1000 miles and 100 years from here. Oh...ya' didn't know you were eatin' cuddly little rabbits?

Rabbit...the other white meat...that is before you tear that cotton hide off of them. :D

[Virgil]

Somewhere in the 70-80 range, I think. Lots anyway.



That makes more sense actually. :) Don't know why I thought it was 90s.

I thought it was in the 90's too. Look it up and according to this site it's 80%.
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_percentage_of_the_human_body_is_water

[Emil Miller]

Now we are on a biological kick, I once had a discussion with a woman about human intelligence. I remarked on the relative size of the male brain as compared to the female and she replied that it is quality not quantity that counts. What are the Blokes' views on this?

[skib]

According to women, 'size doesn't matter,' or so I'm told.

[skib]

Sport?!?!?! It's not a sport, deary... Where do ya' think that Parker got the meat for that Rabbit stew that yer eatin'? There's not a Wal-Mart in 1000 miles and 100 years from here. Oh...ya' didn't know you were eatin' cuddly little rabbits?

Rabbit...the other white meat...that is before you tear that cotton hide off of them. :D

Hunting is a SPORT as well as a WAY OF LIFE!! My family eats more game meat than anything!

[imthefoolonthehill]

I recently purchased a crossbow for urban pest removal. 100 lb tension. Shoots darts that you can attach a line to if you decide to go fishing.

[LostPrincess13]

What's the name of that town again?


:lol:


Sport?!?!?! It's not a sport, deary... Where do ya' think that Parker got the meat for that Rabbit stew that yer eatin'? There's not a Wal-Mart in 1000 miles and 100 years from here. Oh...ya' didn't know you were eatin' cuddly little rabbits?

Rabbit...the other white meat...that is before you tear that cotton hide off of them. :D

Oh my! I thought rabbits were meant to be pets, not game! Besides, they're adorable!

[LostPrincess13]

I recently purchased a crossbow for urban pest removal. 100 lb tension. Shoots darts that you can attach a line to if you decide to go fishing.

Ooooh, this may sound strange, but I've always been interested in bows and arrows and weaponry similar to it.:D Swords and shields too.:) Especially those ancient ones with intricate designs and seals.:)

[BienvenuJDC]

:lol:



Oh my! I thought rabbits were meant to be pets, not game! Besides, they're adorable!

Well...isn't your meal something to adore?

[LostPrincess13]

Now we are on a biological kick, I once had a discussion with a woman about human intelligence. I remarked on the relative size of the male brain as compared to the female and she replied that it is quality not quantity that counts. What are the Blokes' views on this?

I've read somewhere that men are generally smarter than women.:alien:

[NikolaiI]

I thought it was in the 90's too. Look it up and according to this site it's 80%.
http://wiki.answers.com/Q/What_percentage_of_the_human_body_is_water

hahaha! great minds think alike, even if wrong! :)

[BienvenuJDC]

Now we are on a biological kick, I once had a discussion with a woman about human intelligence. I remarked on the relative size of the male brain as compared to the female and she replied that it is quality not quantity that counts. What are the Blokes' views on this?

It's not the overall size, but the development of the particular parts of the brain. The area of the brain that controls the logical and analytical processes are typically larger and more developed in males. Make whatever conclusion from this that you wish.

[imthefoolonthehill]

I've read somewhere that men are generally smarter than women.:alien:

All I know is that whichever gender I have had a conversation with last... that seems to be the one I think is less intelligent.... so, as you can imagine, my opinion switches throughout the day.

[Virgil]

I've read somewhere that men are generally smarter than women.:alien:


It's not the overall size, but the development of the particular parts of the brain. The area of the brain that controls the logical and analytical processes are typically larger and more developed in males. Make whatever conclusion from this that you wish.

I've read that men have the more extremes, blathering idiots and super genius and women are more consistent in the average. I don't know about super genius, but I know we have some blathering idots around. :lol:

[Lokasenna]

Women also have that scary ability to multitask...

Shame they can't drive well, mind...;)

[Virgil]

Women also have that scary ability to multitask...

Shame they can't drive well, mind...;)

:lol: uh Oh. Now here's another subject to ponder. The differences in driving. :D

[The Atheist]

Women also have that scary ability to multitask...

Nah, I don;t buy a bar of that - they pretend to multitask knowing nobody will ever pull them up on it, because they'll resort to PMS mode.


Shame they can't drive well, mind...;)

You wrote that in the right place! Lucky no women are here to dispute it.

[prendrelemick]

While this thread is testing the waters of misogyny;


How many blonde girls does it take to change a light bulb?
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Just one, she holds the bulb and the world revolves around her.

[BienvenuJDC]

Nah, I don;t buy a bar of that - they pretend to multitask knowing nobody will ever pull them up on it, because they'll resort to PMS mode.

Atheist...we agree again...

[JBI]

I've read that men have the more extremes, blathering idiots and super genius and women are more consistent in the average. I don't know about super genius, but I know we have some blathering idots around. :lol:

I would think the opposite - women to me seem smarter than men - surely today at any rate, but either way, I bet it is all sociological rather than biological. Sciencey people like to pretend neurology or whatever can explain everything, but lets be honest, when it comes down to it, who would one rather trust for an opinion on both the commonplace, and the demanding? I know myself, I'd probably trust a woman over a man, and I think women would trust women over men too.

[Emil Miller]

OK guys, here's another one for you.Tonight I was on a train and a guy and a girl got on at a busy station along the line and sat opposite me. They were both in their twenties, I would say, and were discussing a concert they had attended.The girl was not what you would call good looking but she had a striking personality. She was, well, just incredibly nice, with a constant smile and very relaxed disposition. I felt quite envious of the guy, who seemed a bit morose in contrast.
Now the question is, do you consider that looks, for all their pulling power, are more important than a lively personality?

[The Atheist]

Now the question is, do you consider that looks, for all their pulling power, are more important than a lively personality?

Looks fade, personalities change.

It's a conundrum, and I don't think there's an easy or single answer. Because you have to get to know them to know whether the personality is really that good, I think it's quite often hard to tell until it's too late.

[JBI]

OK guys, here's another one for you.Tonight I was on a train and a guy and a girl got on at a busy station along the line and sat opposite me. They were both in their twenties, I would say, and were discussing a concert they had attended.The girl was not what you would call good looking but she had a striking personality. She was, well, just incredibly nice, with a constant smile and very relaxed disposition. I felt quite envious of the guy, who seemed a bit morose in contrast.
Now the question is, do you consider that looks, for all their pulling power, are more important than a lively personality?

That is built on the assumption that someone cannot be a lively personality while good looking. Quite simply though, as long as they aren't detestable looking, probably the latter, but if they are hideous, like all people, I wouldn't go there, even if she were Santa Maria herself.

[BienvenuJDC]

But beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What is hideous to one is not so hideous to another. If physical beauty is important to the individual, then that individual shouldn't ignore that fact.

[JBI]

But beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What is hideous to one is not so hideous to another. If physical beauty is important to the individual, then that individual shouldn't ignore that fact.

The question though, was not what is beauty, but whether you value beauty or not. For someone who has some weird fetish or whatever, if that fetish is not satisfied, perhaps they will not find the person beautiful, and then choose them over the girl who doesn't have a huge wart, but happens to be the nicest person in the world.

I doubt my aesthetic matches many people, but that makes no difference. The truth is, one needs to sleep with/beside said person over a period of time - if one is engaging in a relationship, perhaps over a large period of time - if one does not find them physically attractive, it could have dire consequences on their relationship. Try having sex with someone you find repulsive - then try doing that regularly.

But of course, the binary goes both ways. Try having dinner with someone you cannot stand, or waking up beside them. Not much fun. One needs to ask themselves what they truly want, and go for it. It is all a matter of preference, but lets be honest, there are two halves of the body, and both need to be satisfied to some extent.

[LostPrincess13]

OK guys, here's another one for you.Tonight I was on a train and a guy and a girl got on at a busy station along the line and sat opposite me. They were both in their twenties, I would say, and were discussing a concert they had attended.The girl was not what you would call good looking but she had a striking personality. She was, well, just incredibly nice, with a constant smile and very relaxed disposition. I felt quite envious of the guy, who seemed a bit morose in contrast.
Now the question is, do you consider that looks, for all their pulling power, are more important than a lively personality?

Now this is a topic I'm extremely interested to hear about.:D

[BienvenuJDC]

The question though, was not what is beauty, but whether you value beauty or not. For someone who has some weird fetish or whatever, if that fetish is not satisfied, perhaps they will not find the person beautiful, and then choose them over the girl who doesn't have a huge wart, but happens to be the nicest person in the world.

I doubt my aesthetic matches many people, but that makes no difference. The truth is, one needs to sleep with/beside said person over a period of time - if one is engaging in a relationship, perhaps over a large period of time - if one does not find them physically attractive, it could have dire consequences on their relationship. Try having sex with someone you find repulsive - then try doing that regularly.

But of course, the binary goes both ways. Try having dinner with someone you cannot stand, or waking up beside them. Not much fun. One needs to ask themselves what they truly want, and go for it. It is all a matter of preference, but lets be honest, there are two halves of the body, and both need to be satisfied to some extent.

...and that is why I said that if it is important...then they shouldn't ignore it...

[NikolaiI]

But beauty is in the eye of the beholder. What is hideous to one is not so hideous to another. If physical beauty is important to the individual, then that individual shouldn't ignore that fact.

Absolutely true.

[The Atheist]

The question though, was not what is beauty, but whether you value beauty or not.

Haha! We've been here before.


Try having sex with someone you find repulsive - then try doing that regularly.

In the early stages, I think that applies, but the old expression "love is blind" is often true and attraction to the person can outweigh physical beauty/repulsiveness.

[NikolaiI]

I would say personality. But then in the body, the main thing I find attractive is good health...

But personality is definitely... trumping... for instance, physicality can only be so much, but the personality can be so much more. Of course I know some people here don't believe in the soul (*chuckles*...heh, heh :D), and I am using the term personality, but for me also it is the soul which is more attractive.

[BienvenuJDC]

Even the Bible mentions body, soul, and spirit, which implies that there is something else on the physical side of it. The physical body, the physical life force/or personality, and the eternal soul. So if you don't believe in the eternal soul, there's still a personality...

[NikolaiI]

Even the Bible mentions body, soul, and spirit, which implies that there is something else on the physical side of it. The physical body, the physical life force/or personality, and the eternal soul. So if you don't believe in the eternal soul, there's still a personality...

Oh I know that. But I was saying, personality is not all of it for me, as the soul is more than just personality.

[Silas Thorne]

re beauty



In the early stages, I think that applies.

Unless you've had a few too many drinks, then beauty is directly proportionate to how much alcohol you've consumed, and whether she keeps laughing at your jokes. :D

[BienvenuJDC]

Oh I know that. But I was saying, personality is not all of it for me, as the soul is more than just personality.

My wife and I have learned a lot about how much we don't know about the human body when our daughter was born with Down Syndrome...not that you can't learn the same from any child, but I think that we just opened our eyes a little wider. Beauty, personality, intelligence, and so on...it all became redefined. I understand what you are saying...and I couldn't agree more, but I just wasn't very good at explaining that in the last post.


re beauty



Unless you've had a few too many drinks, then beauty is directly proportionate to how much alcohol you've consumed, and whether she keeps laughing at your jokes. :D

Is the amount of alcohol that SHE has consumed directly proportionate to how much she laughs at your jokes?

[Silas Thorne]

Ah yes, that too! :D

[Lokasenna]

Personality all the way - I made the mistake of dating a good-looking girl simply because she was good-looking; turned out to be a right psycho...

That said, if a woman can have a lovely personality and a face to match it, then so much the better!

[The Atheist]

Unless you've had a few too many drinks, then beauty is directly proportionate to how much alcohol you've consumed, and whether she keeps laughing at your jokes. :D

Bit like blokes in the outback in Australia. After six months, even the sheep start to look good.


Is the amount of alcohol that SHE has consumed directly proportionate to how much she laughs at your jokes?

Hell yeah! How many relationships would remain unconsummated without the lubrication of alcohol is approaching a subset of infinity.

[Emil Miller]

While we're on the subject of women, another thing has struck me that might be relevant to the discussion i.e. Do you get turned off by a female's accent. I guess we have all seen the gorgeous looking girl who is a complete turn off as soon as she opens her mouth. Like Eliza Doolittle in Pygmalian for example or some of those classy American blondes who speak with a Bronx accent. Of course, one doesn't tend to notice it in women from non- English speaking countries unless one is very familiar with the spoken language. I guess that the same applies for women with regard to men's accents but I don't know to what degree.

[BienvenuJDC]

One that would shut me down in a heartbeat...Fran Drescher who played The Nanny. I believe that is the Bronx accent that you are speaking of...it's a tell tale sign of the level of class. (for me, that is)

[LostPrincess13]

*takes down notes in clipboard*

[kilted exile]

Ok, first up: looks vs personality depends on how I see the relationship going. If I think it is going to be a more long term thing personality. If it may end up some drunken fumbling looks generally win - I'm a pig but an honest one


Accents: the worst have to be the scouse & cockney accents

[Emil Miller]

Accents: the worst have to be the scouse & cockney accents

I''ve got to go along with that, and for good measure I'll throw in Birmingham.
I once worked with a guy from the deep south of Ireland, I think it was Connemara, and for most of the time I just couldn't understand a word he was saying.

[Virgil]

I can't say that accents really bother me. For me it expands the personality. It's what's being said that can be a turn off, not the manner. Sure one might be taken a back at first with an accent. But that's just a short term thing.

[Emil Miller]

I can't say that accents really bother me. For me it expands the personality. It's what's being said that can be a turn off, not the manner. Sure one might be taken a back at first with an accent. But that's just a short term thing.

Yes but Virg you should hear some London girls speaking in cockney tones. Dropped aithches, strangulated vowels and glottal stops galore it's the verbal equivalent of Godzilla.

[Lokasenna]

More than a bad accent, a hideous laugh puts me off...

Remember Sybil Fawlty? Sounds like "someone machine-gunning a seal"? That kinda thing...

[kilted exile]

ah yes the laugh is improtant

whilst we're on the subject of fawlty towers my favourite bit was the scene where polly is trying to guess the name of the horse

[AimusSage]

I'm bored already! Men just don't talk as much as girls. We use our time for more important things. Take drinking beer for example you don't have to talk all the time it takes away valuable drinking time. A playstation and a good video game and I'm happy for hours, or give me a car, a football or sports on the TV. Talking too much makes me tired. I need something to look at first.

[Niamh]

I''ve got to go along with that, and for good measure I'll throw in Birmingham.
I once worked with a guy from the deep south of Ireland, I think it was Connemara, and for most of the time I just couldn't understand a word he was saying.

sure it was connemara and not kerry? connemara being west of Ireland and a kerry or cork accent being hard to understand for most of the rest of the country...

[Emil Miller]

I'm bored already! Men just don't talk as much as girls. We use our time for more important things. Take drinking beer for example you don't have to talk all the time it takes away valuable drinking time. A playstation and a good video game and I'm happy for hours, or give me a car, a football or sports on the TV. Talking too much makes me tired. I need something to look at first.

I'm pretty sure that men don't talk as much as women, I regularly get calls from a woman in New York that never last less than an hour and the converation is largely a monologue, but that doesn't mean that I don't want to talk about the things that interest me. Take politics for example, I could happily talk for hours on the subject but, for obvious reasons, it is banned from the Litnet forums. There are, however, other interesting things to talk about such as women and alchoholic beverages and sports and mens lives in general. Now video games are interesting to a point but ultimately they become the province of the zombie and no matter how often a player might win, at the end of a long session, there is always the feeling that you have been wasting your time in a trivial pursuit. Much the same can be said of TV which, in England at any rate, is mind-bendingly boring. I think that if any member of this thread is caught watching Desperate Housewives he should banned from the club and shot the day after.

[The Atheist]

Like Eliza Doolittle in Pygmalian for example or some of those classy American blondes who speak with a Bronx accent.


One that would shut me down in a heartbeat...Fran Drescher who played The Nanny. I believe that is the Bronx accent that you are speaking of...it's a tell tale sign of the level of class. (for me, that is)

I get one look at Fran Drescher's legs and she could speak Martian through a megaphone and I wouldn't notice.

:D


I think that if any member of this thread is caught watching Desperate Housewives he should banned from the club and shot the day after.

That's far too mild.

Sport is the only really acceptable thing to watch on tv - I tried watching the news a year or so ago and realised that tv news is an outlet for morons. I was waiting for the article to tell us that the sea is wet.

For watching and American serial drama, the punishment needs to be a real deterrent, and a simple death goes nowhere near enough - at least a week in the rack beforehand, I feel.

Parker has been known to have a television set up during Ashes series.

[BienvenuJDC]

I get one look at Fran Drescher's legs and she could speak Martian through a megaphone and I wouldn't notice.


I guess that duct tape could be applied to the mouth...:idea:

[Emil Miller]

sure it was connemara and not kerry? connemara being west of Ireland and a kerry or cork accent being hard to understand for most of the rest of the country...

Now I come to think of it, I asked him why some Irish men wore such tremendously wide trousers and he replied ( mumbled ) something about them being Connemara men which is, apparently, a Mecca for wearer's of wide trousers. So, yes, he could well have come from Cork or Kerry.

[JBI]

Haha! We've been here before.



In the early stages, I think that applies, but the old expression "love is blind" is often true and attraction to the person can outweigh physical beauty/repulsiveness.

Do you think someone can be pretty enough to completely outweigh a vileness of character? The question can be applied to anything - the problem is, that many people contain both qualities, and the divide makes an assumption that nice people are ugly, or ugly people are all nice - there are plenty of repulsive looking, vile people in this world.

The real problem though, is discussing it, since one is always weighing two factors, which really are very intermixed, against each other, while the factors themselves are relative. So one could say this person is nice, but one could say that they aren't looking for a "nice" person, but someone who is somewhat aggressive, or mean. I know enough has been written about the archetype of the "*****" in society, and its supposed appeal to men. One needs to really define what one is truly looking for, a very difficult task, before any value judgments or thoughts on judgments can be made.

In that sense, one when speaking on this subject is weighing one abstract undefined, relative thing against another - I don't think personalities are really that divided. I think the way a person sees them self has too big an effect on their personality to really distinguish between them. People seem to different to really come up with an answer to this question. Generally though, I'm of the mind that people don't want to engage in physical relationships with people they find physically repulsive, whatever that can mean. Is that a general rule? Who knows - even that can vary between people.

[The Atheist]

Do you think someone can be pretty enough to completely outweigh a vileness of character? The question can be applied to anything - the problem is, that many people contain both qualities, and the divide makes an assumption that nice people are ugly, or ugly people are all nice - there are plenty of repulsive looking, vile people in this world.

Yep, and absolute blonde babes with PhDs (http://www.usyd.edu.au/research/opportunities/supervisors/548).

I dunno whether you could say there's a level of beauty which outweighs vileness, but I'd certainly say there's a level of physical attraction which would allow the vileness to be overcome.


I know enough has been written about the archetype of the "*****" in society, and its supposed appeal to men.

Just the opposite of those women we touched on before who are attracted to bad guys.


Generally though, I'm of the mind that people don't want to engage in physical relationships with people they find physically repulsive, whatever that can mean. Is that a general rule? Who knows - even that can vary between people.

I wonder if that's just a cultural construct. Take arranged marriages, which also usually occur in cultures where divorce is hard to obtain, so I'd expect those people to be pretty open regarding physical attraction.

Also, there's no doubt that sexual needs rise with frustration. In men's prisons, the vast majority of long-term inmates end up having homosexual sex with other inmates, despite clearly not being "gay" to start with. I'd bet most of those men would swap the most gorgeous young male crim for a pretty ugly female.

[BienvenuJDC]

...a pretty ugly female.

Is that an oxymoron?

[prendrelemick]

I find a beautiful face, and flawless skin, most attractive in a woman. ( not in a Hannibal Lecter kind of way.)

But looks in a woman aren't everything. I know this is true becuase my wife says so.

I have no problem with accents, BUT the tone of voice can be off putting. I once knew a lovely girl who sounded like Mrs Thatcher. That didn't last.

Then there was the one whos voice sounded like someone drawing their finger nails across a blackboard. That never got started.

Billiards anyone?

[Emil Miller]

I find a beautiful face, and flawless skin, most attractive in a woman. ( not in a Hannibal Lecter kind of way.)

But looks in a woman aren't everything. I know this is true becuase my wife says so.

I have no problem with accents, BUT the tone of voice can be off putting. I once knew a lovely girl who sounded like Mrs Thatcher. That didn't last.

Then there was the one whos voice sounded like someone drawing their finger nails across a blackboard. That never got started.

Billiards anyone?

But how can you know that it is a flawless skin when they as soon as they get up in the morning they are covering their faces with all kinds of stuff.
One of the annoying things in life is to go into a chemists for a tube of toothpaste and spend ages waiting to be served because a couple of females are in front with baskets full of lotions, potions, foundation creams, mascara, false eyelashes and God knows what else.

I am pretty sure that most women would say the same as your wife but why then do they spend so much time and money on cosmetics. Is it really because they're worth it?

Mrs Thatcher's tone of voice was rather bossy but just right for some of the naughty boys in her cabinet.


Good to see billiards in the games room; much more civilised than snooker. I understand that US members are pressing for a pool table in the speakeasy. I do hope the club secretary doesn't decide to locate it it the games room. It could lead to other things, such as one-armed bandits and pin ball machines.

[papayahed]

I am pretty sure that most women would say the same as your wife but why then do they spend so much time and money on cosmetics. Is it really because they're worth it?


Yes, we are worth it. Cosmetics and lotions and potions are fun! It is just like guys and tools.

Accents - I thought the lead singer to Godsmack was a down right hottie until he opened his mouth and that New England/Boston accent came flying out. Blech! I just can't get behind the Boston, New York, New Jersey accents, most of the others I'm ok with.

[jekan blazer]

what about a secret agent/spy? pm me with your opinions!!!

[Chava]

But how can you know that it is a flawless skin when they as soon as they get up in the morning they are covering their faces with all kinds of stuff.
One of the annoying things in life is to go into a chemists for a tube of toothpaste and spend ages waiting to be served because a couple of females are in front with baskets full of lotions, potions, foundation creams, mascara, false eyelashes and God knows what else.

Wow, you already know more about it than me.

[BienvenuJDC]

How many women are in here now...is the bouncer not doing his job?

I know I was the one who said that one lost princess added atmosphere, but I never said anything about letting any of them talk... ;)

[The Comedian]

Hey Blokes,

You might find my latest blog entry, "The Tragedy of Hesitation," entertaining.

The Comedian

[Lokasenna]

Some of the most beautiful women I know wear no make-up.

I actually think it can be singularly unattractive if a woman is wearing too much stuff... kinda reminds me of a clown... and I wouldn't want to date a clown...

[The Atheist]

Billiards anyone?

Absolutely - I'll bring the port through.


Mrs Thatcher's tone of voice was rather bossy but just right for some of the naughty boys in her cabinet.

A BDSM dream!

:lol:


Good to see billiards in the games room; much more civilised than snooker. I understand that US members are pressing for a pool table in the speakeasy. I do hope the club secretary doesn't decide to locate it it the games room. It could lead to other things, such as one-armed bandits and pin ball machines.

Parker was once asked about pool tables.

After displaying astonishment that anyone would want a pool in the club and then why you'd put a table in it, the matter was dropped and never referred to again.


I know I was the one who said that one lost princess added atmosphere, but I never said anything about letting any of them talk... ;)

Have you ever known a woman who shut up?


Some of the most beautiful women I know wear no make-up.

I actually think it can be singularly unattractive if a woman is wearing too much stuff... kinda reminds me of a clown... and I wouldn't want to date a clown...

Agree entirely. I used to chase those heavily made-up types around and they don't look too flash the next day.

Nor do your pillows, clothes, and anything else within smearing distance of the crud they put all over themselves.

[prendrelemick]

I believe Mr William Cobbett put it best when he said he would rather lick the sweat from the brow of an honest dairymaid, than kiss the powdered cheek of a Dutchess.

[Virgil]

I find a beautiful face, and flawless skin, most attractive in a woman. ( not in a Hannibal Lecter kind of way.)


Why would anyone but an axe murderer even think of Hannibal Lecter when thinking of flawless skin? :p :lol:

[Silas Thorne]

Perhaps because of this line, not actually said by Hannibal Lecter, but 'Buffalo Bill', in the 'Silence of the Lambs' movie:
'It rubs the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again. '
Maybe through this. :)
Axes are too messy anyway, aren't they Virgil? ;)

[Virgil]

:lol: I guess. Before prendrelemick takes me seriously, I was only kidding. ;)

[LostPrincess13]

But how can you know that it is a flawless skin when they as soon as they get up in the morning they are covering their faces with all kinds of stuff.
One of the annoying things in life is to go into a chemists for a tube of toothpaste and spend ages waiting to be served because a couple of females are in front with baskets full of lotions, potions, foundation creams, mascara, false eyelashes and God knows what else.

I am pretty sure that most women would say the same as your wife but why then do they spend so much time and money on cosmetics. Is it really because they're worth it?



Some of the most beautiful women I know wear no make-up.

I actually think it can be singularly unattractive if a woman is wearing too much stuff... kinda reminds me of a clown... and I wouldn't want to date a clown...

I think the cosmetics were meant to enhance beauty. The fine line is knowing how to put them on such that one wouldn't look like a circus freak. :lol: Make-up can be an art. The lady's face being the canvas.;)

And I definitely agree with Loki.:D The loveliest of ladies are often times those without any chemical on her face.:D

And Mr. Bean, men can be as vain as women.:D I know of a guy (yes, he's straight) who's had more beauty products than I do! I mean he's got everything! Lotion, moisturizer, hair care products, cologne, etc... Made me jealous...:lol:



How many women are in here now...is the bouncer not doing his job?

I know I was the one who said that one lost princess added atmosphere, but I never said anything about letting any of them talk... ;)

LOL!:lol: Would you fault us for finding this thread engaging?;)



Have you ever known a woman who shut up?


True...:)

[Madhuri]

And Mr. Bean, men can be as vain as women.:D I know of a guy (yes, he's straight) who's had more beauty products than I do! I mean he's got everything! Lotion, moisturizer, hair care products, cologne, etc... Made me jealous...:lol:


This reminds me of an incident that happened a few years back. One of my batchmates went to London for an assignment, and was to stay there for a year or so. Now, he found everything very expensive there (the same stuff one can get at 1/10 the cost back home). So, he asked me to send some stuff for him and in that list he asked for..... NOSE STRIPS!!! :eek2: I was like....what is that?? (I got to know from him that there is something called nose strips :p) .... and once he told me the use... I thought... Oh, my! Do guys do all that?? :goof: :lol:

And, yeah, there was another batchmate of mine...who during the college days would get his eyebrows done..... :eek2:

Can you imagine the shock I got? :lol:

[LostPrincess13]

This reminds me of an incident that happened a few years back. One of my batchmates went to London for an assignment, and was to stay there for a year or so. Now, he found everything very expensive there (the same stuff one can get at 1/10 the cost back home). So, he asked me to send some stuff for him and in that list he asked for..... NOSE STRIPS!!! :eek2: I was like....what is that?? (I got to know from him that there is something called nose strips :p) .... and once he told me the use... I thought... Oh, my! Do guys do all that?? :goof: :lol:

And, yeah, there was another batchmate of mine...who during the college days would get his eyebrows done..... :eek2:

Can you imagine the shock I got? :lol:

LOL!:lol: What are nose strips? LOL!:lol: Oh my, I remember I used to fight tooth and nail whenever someone tries to do my eyebrows!:lol: And make-up to...:lol: I don't like that stuff much...:p


...is the bouncer not doing his job?


Oh by the way, Mr. Bouncer just looovvvees fudge brownies...;)
:D

[prendrelemick]

Harrumph!

I come in here after a hard day running the Empire, looking forward to some Jovial banter with the chaps, and what do I find? Females discussing make-up!


' place is going to the dogs!

[BienvenuJDC]

Oh by the way, Mr. Bouncer just looovvvees fudge brownies...;)
:D

If you're makin' fudge brownies for the bouncer...you better make some for me too!!:idea:

[LostPrincess13]

Harrumph!

I come in here after a hard day running the Empire, looking forward to some Jovial banter with the chaps, and what do I find? Females discussing make-up!


' place is going to the dogs!

LOL!:blush: Worry not sir, it was just a slight diversion. It wouldn't be happening again.:) I'm not very fond of the stuff anyways.:) Would you care for a cup of coffee? A newspaper and some biscuits maybe? Or perhaps some brandy? Let me take your coat and hat and show you to your usual seat.:)


If you're makin' fudge brownies for the bouncer...you better make some for me too!!:idea:

As you wish!:D Can I get you anything else?:)

[prendrelemick]

LOL!:blush: Worry not sir, it was just a slight diversion. It wouldn't be happening again.:) I'm not very fond of the stuff anyways.:) Would you care for a cup of coffee? A newspaper and some biscuits maybe? Or perhaps some brandy? Let me take your coat and hat and show you to your usual seat.:)




Dear lady!

(Bristleing moustache relaxes)

[BienvenuJDC]

As you wish!:D Can I get you anything else?:)

Can we keep this one?

[Carrolb2]

Can we keep this one?

Maybe. Depends on how well she makes a martini.

[Emil Miller]

[QUOTE=LostPrincess13;708332]

And Mr. Bean, men can be as vain as women.:D I know of a guy (yes, he's straight) who's had more beauty products than I do! I mean he's got everything! Lotion, moisturizer, hair care products, cologne, etc... Made me jealous...:lol:QUOTE]

Whatever you do, don't tell him about this thread. I dont think he would contribute to the manly mood that currently prevails among the blokes.

[jekan blazer]

did anyone hear? there is a spy in the coffee forum!!!!

[The Atheist]

I know of a guy (yes, he's straight) who's had more beauty products than I do! I mean he's got everything! Lotion, moisturizer, hair care products, cologne, etc... Made me jealous...

The doorman is trained spot those types at 100' and they will be advised that the place they're looking for is not this one.


Oh by the way, Mr. Bouncer just looovvvees fudge brownies...;)
:D

Bouncer?

You must have the wrong establishment.


' place is going to the dogs!

Always happens when Parker's away.

It was his annual leave day yesterday and I've already spoken to him this morning.

He just cannot find a suitable Aide de Commissionaire at the moment. He has already sacked the doorman and has a new man in place this morning.

Should be fine now.


Maybe. Depends on how well she makes a martini.

Ah, yes. When I was a martini drinker, I used to keep both gin and vermouth in the deepest part of the icebox, along with the glasses and shaker.

For me, a properly made martini should be served at about -4 deg C.

I had four at lunchtime once - we won't go into that right now!


Whatever you do, don't tell him about this thread. I dont think he would contribute to the manly mood that currently prevails among the blokes.

I doubt we'll see him, although it's always great to see new chaps, so we can introduce them to the finer points of English club sports. That last chap who arrived unexpectedly and was encouraged to have a go at "Holding the dartboard" was most excellent fun!

[jekan blazer]

hey atheist... how art thou?

[jekan blazer]

i sent my sister to spy on the girls thread.... am i good or what?

[prendrelemick]

Is espionage necessary ?

Wait until there is a spider in the bath, they'll be begging us to go over and sort it.



What are they talking about by the way?

[Niamh]

:rolleyes: Jeez. Not all women are 100% predictable girly.

[Emil Miller]

There is story going round that two of our members have been seen in the women's coffee group recently.
Another rumour is that some of the younger US members want to install a juke box in the speakeasy, which doesn't augur well for the relaxed atmosphere required by those who prefer the dulcet tones of the string quartet in the main lounge.
The next thing you know will be pork scratchings among the nibbles placed on the bar counter for the delectation of members and the introduction of Newcastle brown ale on the drinks list.

[The Atheist]

hey atheist... how art thou?

Excellent!


i sent my sister to spy on the girls thread.... am i good or what?

No, that's no good at all.

This is a men's club, and while the occasional visit from a member of the fairer sex for the purpose of admiring the oak panels is no problem at all, it is most certainly not the done thing to discuss women's issues.

Many women have issues, and a room full of them usually has more issues than The Times' archives.

We do not need them in here.

There are clubs which have women's areas. Luckily, this is not one of them.


There is story going round that two of our members have been seen in the women's coffee group recently.

Yes, Parker mentioned he'd had to rummage around and find the black balls.

I do trust they're not needed. 1962 was the last occasion apparently.


Another rumour is that some of the younger US members want to install a juke box in the speakeasy, which doesn't augur well for the relaxed atmosphere required by those who prefer the dulcet tones of the string quartet in the main lounge.

It's one of those thin edge of the wedge movements.

First a juke box, then women, then young men in white suits, then young men wearing those American caps backwards with their trousers halfway down.

Not bloody likely!


The next thing you know will be pork scratchings among the nibbles placed on the bar counter for the delectation of members and the introduction of Newcastle brown ale on the drinks list.

This, I feel is a little unfair.

While we want to preserve class, we certainly don't want any class distinction, and while raving Geordies mightn't be everyone's cup of tea, neither are Brummies, Scousers, Micks, Taffies, Chelsea supporters and Jocks!

Plus, my dear old mum was a scratching girl. I'd rather eat a dead mouse myself, but each to their own.

:D

[LostPrincess13]

Here's your martini Mr. Carrolb2!:D

http://www.spokane7.com/images/2005/mar/4/martini.jpg

Your brownies Mr. BienvenuJDC: :D

http://knitfit.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2007/04/17/brownies_3.jpg

And your brandy Mr. Prendrelemick: :D

http://www.lakewoodconferences.com/direct/dbimage/50214569/Dynasty_Napoleon_Brandy.jpg

Anyone else want anything?:)

[prendrelemick]

There are clubs which have women's areas. Luckily, this is not one of them.

:D

Womens' areas! That would be the kitchen I presume

[Silas Thorne]

The lost one seems perfectly capable behind the bar too. Maybe we'd better not let the liquor authorities know she's serving drinks when she's not old enough to drink them.:D

[skib]

I'll take a stiff Jack and Coke, easy on the ice.

[Lokasenna]

Womens' areas! That would be the kitchen I presume

That made me chuckle...

And as the weather is so lovely, I'll take a Pimms!

[LostPrincess13]

The lost one seems perfectly capable behind the bar too. Maybe we'd better not let the liquor authorities know she's serving drinks when she's not old enough to drink them.:D

LOL!:lol: I'm sure it's perfectly fine. It's only three more months till I'm of legal age.:) My dad and I sometimes bond over a few bottles of beer during occasions.:) I take mine light of course.;)


I'll take a stiff Jack and Coke, easy on the ice.

Here you are sir!:D

http://www.ttfatloss.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/04/jack_daniels_coke.jpg


That made me chuckle...

And as the weather is so lovely, I'll take a Pimms!

Lovely day indeed!:D Any plans for today sir?:)

http://blogs.mirror.co.uk/blag-blog/Pimms.JPG

[BienvenuJDC]

Strong coffee...with a bit of cream...and I like it sweet...

Are those molasses cookies I see?

[LostPrincess13]

Strong coffee...with a bit of cream...and I like it sweet...

Are those molasses cookies I see?

On the double!:D And I hope the presentation isn't too feminine for your taste.:)

http://www.singleservecoffee.com/images/small_cup_of_coffee.preview.jpg

http://www.countryliving.com/cm/countryliving/images/y6/molasses-cookies-de.jpg

[Michael T]

He pushed the double, heavy oak doors aside and they swung open easily before him, a glint of sunlight flashing on the polished brass ‘MEN ONLY’ signs pinned to each door. The expensive scent of a layer of smoke that hung in the air drifted past as he made his way through the small groups of men, a few in animated conversation, others leaning back languidly, reading the broadsheets or deeply engrossed in some leather bound volume. Others watched, enthralled, the gladiatorial unfolding of a brutal team sport on the wide screen television that hung above the bar between two trophies, huge mounted marlins. There was an air of comfortable assurance about these men, easy in the company of their own sex. Surrounded as they were by the portraits of other men who had shaped the world, that hung everywhere in gilt frames on the panelled walls. Expensive bourbons, whiskeys and foreign beers littered the small tables in crystal glasses and tumblers. As he reached the bar he quickly caught the eye of the one barmaid serving drinks. He made sure to notice the name on the small plastic badge pinned to the chest of her blouse and asked the girl to make sure she put the ice in his glass before the single-malt whisky he had ordered. The girl did as she was asked and as she prepared his drink he made his way to the large humidor at the end of the bar. He picked out a fat, freshly made cigar, instinctively knowing it had been rolled only days before on the glistening thigh of a bronzed eighteen year old Cuban virgin. He put it under his nose and took in the rich, deep satisfying aroma and slowly made his way over to a worn, comfortable-looking red leather armchair and settled down into it. He clipped the end of the cigar, and - taking a match from the silver holder on the table in front of him – struck it on the chin of a brutish looking fellow in a nearby chair, before puffing the cigar into life. An uneasy tension spread about the room, broken only by the swift movement of the barmaid as she slipped lithely between the tables and placed his drink by his side. “Thank you ‘Lostprincess13’” he said, through thickening cigar smoke. “My pleasure ‘Michael T’” she replied smiling back at him. “And may I say… welcome to the Blokes' thread on this forum”.

[The Comedian]

There is story going round that two of our members have been seen in the women's coffee group recently.
Another rumour is that some of the younger US members want to install a juke box in the speakeasy, which doesn't augur well for the relaxed atmosphere required by those who prefer the dulcet tones of the string quartet in the main lounge.
The next thing you know will be pork scratchings among the nibbles placed on the bar counter for the delectation of members and the introduction of Newcastle brown ale on the drinks list.

The Comedian, a young American, strolls into the Blokes' Thread: turns the telly to NASCAR:

http://www.orienttoday.com/img/nascar.jpg

Orders a beer,

http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3076/2794699974_f808eef85f.jpg

Selects a song by the greatest singer/songwriter known to men:

http://www.cajuncrawfishpie.com/hank-williams-jr.jpg

And says, "I sure do like this here English establishment you all got here. Yes siree. Anyone wanna arm wrestle? I got the next round for anyone who can beat me. . . . . .I'll give you gents a sec to think about it; I have to go take a piss out back" ;););););)

[Emil Miller]

He picked out a fat, freshly made cigar, instinctively knowing it had been rolled only days before on the glistening thigh of a bronzed eighteen year old Cuban virgin.

- taking a match from the silver holder on the table in front of him – struck it on the chin of a brutish looking fellow in a nearby chair, before puffing the cigar into life. ”.

I gave up smoking Cuban cigars when I discovered that their being rolled on the thighs of eighteen-year-old virgins was a myth.
Incidentally, the brutish looking fellow whose chin you used as matchbox wasn't drinking Newcastle brown ale and eating pork scratchings by any chance ?

[BienvenuJDC]

On the double!:D And I hope the presentation isn't too feminine for your taste.:)


Hmmm...Now when I say coffee, we don't ever need to bring a saucer.;)

http://thumbs.dreamstime.com/thumb_7/1109173576LWU8w5.jpg

The the molasses cookies that I was referring to were the once without icing!! No three tiered platters either!!:sick:
http://www.cooking.com.edgesuite.net/images/recipes/rerecite/RE_bc7085.jpg

[Michael T]

Incidentally, the brutish looking fellow whose chin you used as matchbox wasn't drinking Newcastle brown ale and eating pork scratchings by any chance ?


That’s exactly the reason I picked him out 'Brian Bean' :D

[The Atheist]

Womens' areas! That would be the kitchen I presume

:lol:


“And may I say… welcome to the ‘Blokes thread’ on this forum”.

Seconded!


The Comedian, a young American, strolls into the Blokes' Thread: turns the telly to NASCAR...

You must have the wrong club - the television won't be in until the Ashes start.

[prendrelemick]

The Comedian, a young American, strolls into the Blokes' Thread: turns the telly to NASCAR:



Three of the older members Collapse from apoplexy.

[Michael T]

Seconded!


Thank you 'The atheist' glad to be here. :)

[The Comedian]

:You must have the wrong club - the television won't be in until the Ashes start.

:lol: nice!

[Niamh]

Ashes? Meh!
Stick on some real sport. Rugby!

[kilted exile]

Ashes? Meh!
Stick on some real sport. Rugby!

The woman talks sense.


The ashes is a real problem for all scotsmen - we have basically 2 choices neither of which are too appealing. we can either:

a) Support the English (yeah, like thats gonna happen.....)

or

b) Support a bunch of convicts



Then of course we remember it is cricket which is a silly game and change the channel to rugby or fitba'

[The Atheist]

Ashes? Meh!
Stick on some real sport. Rugby!

Whoa. "Real" sport?

You mean that game where 15 blokes run around the paddock, not having a clue what's going on, or who has the ball because the rules are utterly incomprehensible and even the ref just guesses most of the time?

That game where half of all the world cup finals to date have been completed without a single try being scored?

The game where one team can put together brilliant move after brilliant move, driving possession downfield to score 5 points, then 3 minutes later, watch the opposition score three after being penalised because the tighthead prop put his hand on the ground?

The game which still bans padding in its rules, but has 100% of its international players wearing padding?

Is that the one? I've played that once or twice.

:D


The ashes is a real problem for all scotsmen - we have basically 2 choices neither of which are too appealing. we can either:

a) Support the English (yeah, like thats gonna happen.....)

or

b) Support a bunch of convicts

How could you not side with the Aussies? Jeez, they're your spirit brothers!

Check it out:

Hate England with a passion.

Prefer beating England to any other team on the planet.

Drink lots of alcohol.

Love fighting.

Hell, most Aussies are Scottish!


Then of course we remember it is cricket which is a silly game and change the channel to rugby or fitba'

I believe Association Football has been permitted here from time to time. Some years back, one of the footmen's grandsons was competing in quite a large competition. Played just over the other side of London, in Wembley, as it happens. Mid May, I think it was. No idea what it was all about, but an awful lot of people seemed very happy that young Southall's team won.

I'm sure Parker won ten pounds from some bookmaker at the time.

[Emil Miller]

Let us not argue over the relative merits of Rugby ,Association Football or Cricket, which mean little to our transatlantic cousins, and concentrate on the two greatest sports that encompass both sides of the Atlantic and the Pacific;namely, tennis and golf; which happen to be my own preferred sporting endeavours. I would suggest that the club installs television for the American PGA/Open and Ryder Cup tournaments and also the Wimbledon grass court championships.

[skib]

Is golf really a sport? I never knew that . . .
How about the western sport of rodeo? THAT is a man's game.

[Niamh]

Golf? might as well be discussing Cricket.

[skib]

Golf? might as well be discussing Cricket.

:lol: Yay golf! Let us go watch the grass grow.

[Lokasenna]

Chaps! Come on! In our world, every day is the Oxbridge boat race - that surely is our sport!

[The Atheist]

I would suggest that the club installs television for the American PGA/Open and Ryder Cup tournaments and also the Wimbledon grass court championships.

Sounds entirely reasonable!

Not to mention the Open Championship, often mistakenly referred to as "The British Open".


Is golf really a sport? I never knew that . . .
How about the western sport of rodeo? THAT is a man's game.

Western? The Welsh do rodeo?

[skib]

Western? The Welsh do rodeo?

Apologies- AMERICAN sport . . .

[Silas Thorne]

:lol: Yay golf! Let us go watch the grass grow.

:lol: It would be more interesting if there were zombies (beside the players, I mean) on the golf course, or dinosaurs. Perhaps in an ideal world.

What about boxing, rugby (mentioned already), full contact martial arts, and ice hockey?

[skib]

Anything that dishes out a good bruising and a few broken bones works for me. I enjoy the UFC quite a bit, but boxing will work.
I think someone should be shooting paintballs at the golfers.

[Scheherazade]

Womens' areas! That would be the kitchen I presumeWhere else?

Why do women have smaller feet?

So they can stand closer to the sink.

[skib]

Where else?

Why do women have smaller feet?

So they can stand closer to the sink.

Is this an invitation?

[The Atheist]

Apologies- AMERICAN sport . . .

Rodeo's origins go back a lot further than America.

;)

"American sport" always conjures up a game which is only played in USA, yet a "world championship" is held annually. Not a bad plan, I guess.

:D


:lol: It would be more interesting if there were zombies (beside the players, I mean) on the golf course, or dinosaurs. Perhaps in an ideal world.

Spoken like a true 36-handicapper!

Tiger Woods, a zombie? Incredibly rich, married to one of the world's most beautiful women. I wanna be a zombie too!


What about boxing, rugby (mentioned already), full contact martial arts, and ice hockey?

I used to love rugby, but since the game's gone professional, it's died as far as I'm concerned - at the senior level anyway. I still coach the school team, but the players and administrators of the game are a bunch of things I can't adequately describe in here.

Boxing! The noble art?

Yeah, count me in there.

I consider myself privileged to have been alive long enough to vividly remember wagging (playing truant) from high school to watch Ali vs Foreman, which I watched again two days ago. Alas, a lot like rugby, boxing has had its share of troubles and is often nowadays a joke. Multiple champions across weight divisions measured in milligrams....

There are still the odd good bouts I'll watch, but I'm pretty selective.

Now, ice hockey, I do have a problem with. If you could cut the pansy fights out and play the damned game, it might actually be a good sport, but the kindergarten staged fights they have every 15 seconds or so just drives me off it.

Don't let the other members hear it, but I'm quite fond of baseball!

[skib]

Rodeo's origins go back a lot further than America.

;)

"American sport" always conjures up a game which is only played in USA, yet a "world championship" is held annually. Not a bad plan, I guess.

:D



Touche, my friend. You know more about my favorite sport's history than I.

[BienvenuJDC]

Are there no Canadians in here? I haven't heard one person mention Hockey!!

It's Rugby, Golf, Boxing, and Rodeo wrapped up into one...(well, maybe not the rodeo) :lol:

[skib]

Silas mentioned hockey!

Yes, bulls are a little clumsy in skates and the horses would spook every time someone tackled them. Not to mention the constant cleanup of manure off the ice. That would get out of hand, having to pause the game every twenty minutes, get out the wheelbarrows and poop forks . . .

[*Classic*Charm*]

Since there are no REAL men here (and by real, I mean Canadian), I'll throw in that Hockey is by far a better sport than all of the above.

Also, to Skib, bull and bronc riding ARE NOT SPORTS!!!!

Anndd..I'm leaving now. Though may I grab a rum and coke on my way out? The coffee thread lacks this little luxury...

[The Atheist]

Since there are no REAL men here (and by real, I mean Canadian),

Phew, if that's the qualification, I'm having a sex change if there's any chance of joining the real men club by accident.

I'll have to come oot of the closet!


Anndd..I'm leaving now. Though may I grab a rum and coke on my way out? The coffee thread lacks this little luxury...

Coke? That's that black stuff?

Not allowed to have that in the bar, unfortunately. Rots the oak barrels.

[prendrelemick]

Whoa. "Real" sport?

You mean that game where 15 blokes run around the paddock, not having a clue what's going on, or who has the ball because the rules are utterly incomprehensible and even the ref just guesses most of the time?

That game where half of all the world cup finals to date have been completed without a single try being scored?

The game where one team can put together brilliant move after brilliant move, driving possession downfield to score 5 points, then 3 minutes later, watch the opposition score three after being penalised because the tighthead prop put his hand on the ground?

The game which still bans padding in its rules, but has 100% of its international players wearing padding?

Is that the one? I've played that once or twice.



I can tell you have!:lol:

Might I suggest the members attend a game of Rugby League. Its similar to rugger, or kick 'n' Clap as its called round here, but with the silly bits taken out.

I believe games are now held as far south as The Stoop in London. The march of civilisation goes ever onwards.

[imthefoolonthehill]

I heard the onion news network is now covering soccer and other women's sports.

[optimisticnad]

Woah! This is the first time I've come across this, we had something like this before - it died a quick death, unlike the girls' thread; you men can't stick with anything for long except your boxers. :lol:

[BienvenuJDC]

unlike the girls' thread; you men can't stick with anything for long except your boxers. :lol:

This is coming from the gender that changes purses and shoes every day. :lol:
There is a closet at home that is stuffed with purses...another closet that is riddled with shoes. I stick with the same shoes everyday, brown leather...I stick with the same wallet everyday, black leather...and as far as underwear is concerned...you can get at least a week out of one pair (barring no accidents)...:lol::lol::lol::lol::lol:

[The Comedian]

Hey Blokes,

I like all this talk about sports -- and limited use of the television in our club. Though, it would be a shame if use our television for golf. Now, if someone were to put a driving lane out back behind our club, where after a few JDs, we could test our skill, I'd be up for that.

As for now, may I suggest that we pour a drink and deal:

http://weblogs.newsday.com/news/local/longisland/politics/blog/cards.jpeg

[skib]

Since there are no REAL men here (and by real, I mean Canadian), I'll throw in that Hockey is by far a better sport than all of the above.

Also, to Skib, bull and bronc riding ARE NOT SPORTS!!!!

Anndd..I'm leaving now. Though may I grab a rum and coke on my way out? The coffee thread lacks this little luxury...

If you wish to go that direction, hockey is nothing more than a controlled fight on ice.
And go, my lady! Run away with your icky Crown!

[LostPrincess13]

*at lost with all the sports talk; remembers PE class and chuckles at the her only C grade*

*busies herself with the sweeping and the dishes while listening to Mozart on her Ipod (earphones of course)*

[prendrelemick]

Incidentally, the brutish looking fellow whose chin you used as matchbox wasn't drinking Newcastle brown ale and eating pork scratchings by any chance ?

Ahh I see You've met my loutish evil twin. Been persona non gratia since the imfamous faux pas with a young lady known as "Shazza" in the long room at Lords

[optimisticnad]

This is coming from the gender that changes purses and shoes every day. :lol:


That's style, not the inability to stick with something for long. It's ok, don't trouble yourself, you won't understand. :angel:

[LostPrincess13]

Can I offer you some tea ms. optimisticand?:)

[optimisticnad]

Can I offer you some tea ms. optimisticand?:)

:eek:

Didn't I walk into the wrong room?

Ah, what the hell, might as well make ourselves at home, they need us to keep this place open, yes pleas, got any green tea?

[BienvenuJDC]

Can I offer you some tea ms. optimisticand?:)

Maybe you should have offered her the way to the door?:idea:

[LostPrincess13]

I just serve those who come in. :) It's the guards' duty to show people out.

Here you go Ms. Opti! :D

http://www.freshhealthnews.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/01/green-tea.jpg

[BienvenuJDC]

I just serve those who come in.

I might be wrong, but I don't think that Parker will be so agreeable to serving green tea to a female in this establishment. But what do I know...I'm not the owner of this establishment.

[LostPrincess13]

I might be wrong, but I don't think that Parker will be so agreeable to serving green tea to a female in this establishment. But what do I know...I'm not the owner of this establishment.

Oh my!:(

[*Classic*Charm*]

If you wish to go that direction, hockey is nothing more than a controlled fight on ice.
And go, my lady! Run away with your icky Crown!

First of all, that's not true and you know it. There really isn't that much fighting in hockey. Hockey players require actual skills, unlike bull and bronc riders who only have to have enough upper body strength to hold on (even though they're kind of tied in) and big enough spurs to piss of their animals. Let's award more points to the person who can jab his animal the most, yeah, that sounds good. :rolleyes:

Also, I don't drink Crown. Ew. It's all about the good rum. http://www.1-877-spirits.com/store/images/large/Appleton-Estate-VX-lg.jpg

[LostPrincess13]

*stands by uncertainly*

[*Classic*Charm*]

*stands by uncertainly*

It goes in a glass with ice and a little bit of coke LP :), if you're still tending the bar, of course :D

[LostPrincess13]

Um, here you go!:D

http://wwwdelivery.superstock.com/WI/223/1532/PreviewComp/SuperStock_1532R-6010.jpg

I put a little cherry in there as well; hope you don't mind. :)

[BienvenuJDC]

Hockey players require actual skills,

It's all about the good rum.

Well...I don't know much about Rum...
...but I'd have to agree that hockey players require actual skills...
It's not like running a football past the line, they're on skates too!!! That also means that they are moving at a faster pace, requiring a much quicker hand/eye coordination. And if there happened to be a fight that breaks out...it's like a little intermission!


Um, here you go!:D


I don't know about Parker...but I won't say anything about serving a Canadian a little Rum and Coke... ;)

[LostPrincess13]

I couldn't refuse the people! It'll be rude! Um, who's Mr. Parker?

[BienvenuJDC]

I couldn't refuse the people! It'll be rude! Um, who's Mr. Parker?

Read back through the posts...especially Atheist's...he tends the establishment...

Remember where you are...this isn't the Coffee thread...even though some good coffee is served here...

[LostPrincess13]

Oh alright then! I'll give utmost restraint and be more selective of the serving... If that is what you all wish!:D Now if you'll excuse me sir, I must get back to the sweeping. An ashtray has fallen off the counter, and Mr. Michael T had quite a lot of cigars today.:)

[prendrelemick]

Well...I don't know much about Rum...
...but I'd have to agree that hockey players require actual skills...
It's not like running a football past the line, they're on skates too!!! That also means that they are moving at a faster pace,


Skates! Played hockey m'self for the college mixed 11, played on grass in our plimsoles. Don't remember any fights, but some of the gels used to get a bit cattish. ;)

[BienvenuJDC]

Skates! Played hockey m'self for the college mixed 11, played on grass in our plimsoles. Don't remember any fights, but some of the gels used to get a bit cattish. ;)

Sorry, but it seems that some scurvily infected fellow :sick: on the Mayflower didn't bring with them the proper vocabulary. Forgive my ignorance, but could you broaden my poor English vocabulary...

plimsoles...
gels...
cattish...(I deducted that this means rowdy or argumentative :argue:)...

[The Atheist]

Might I suggest the members attend a game of Rugby League. Its similar to rugger, or kick 'n' Clap as its called round here, but with the silly bits taken out.

I believe games are now held as far south as The Stoop in London. The march of civilisation goes ever onwards.

Yeah, it's funny old game. All those years of rugby holding league to the ground by the throat, but give it another five years and it'll be taking over the rugby game. I agree that nowadays, it's a far better game.


I heard the onion news network is now covering soccer and other women's sports.
:D


Now, if someone were to put a driving lane out back behind our club, where after a few JDs, we could test our skill, I'd be up for that.

Just a bit of a problem with space. Anything bigger than a wedge is going straight over th back hedge, and Her Majesty gets worried about the corgis swallowing a golf ball, so no go, I'm afraid.


I just serve those who come in. :) It's the guards' duty to show people out.

Did you fill that cup in the bathroom?


plimsoles...
gels...
cattish...(I deducted that this means rowdy or argumentative :argue:)...

Plimsolls are tennis/sport shoes - canvas topped

Gel [hard G] is a gal/girl - very 19th-century

And you don't describe women as catty sometimes? Still strongly in use. Ever seen catfight? All claws, screaming and biting?

[Niamh]

there is skill in hockey... but! you should all watch a game of Gaelic or Hurling sometime...

[Emil Miller]

there is skill in hockey... but! you should all watch a game of Gaelic or Hurling sometime...

But only if you are wearing flack jackets and steel helmets. The same goes for those attending an Irish wedding.

[Michael T]

The sign of a good sport is, of course, to be measured through it's growth and popularity throughout the world. Those that come immediately to mind are cricket, rugby, football, golf…Hmm I think I see a pattern developing. :D

Do I see my drink coming? :)

[BienvenuJDC]

I didn't hear you order one?

I don't agree that growth and popularity is a sign of a good sport. I have discovered that the masses don't necessarily have the best taste. People are followers...like lemmings. Consider Reality TV...it is very popular, but that does not mean that it's good.

[LostPrincess13]

Do I see my drink coming? :)

Oh I'm sorry sir!:D All the sports talk had me a little distracted! LOL!:lol: Here you go!:D

http://www.gerry-and-les.com/whiskey_2.jpg




Did you fill that cup in the bathroom?



Ummm, what cup, sir? :confused:

And also, I don't mean to be a bother but I'd have to report that we're running a little low on the beverages. The security cameras indicated the source of the problem:

http://www.whiskygrotto.com/wp-content/uploads/2007/12/bowmore_thiefs.jpg

[Silas Thorne]

Quickly skib, get the rifle. Be careful, try not to hit the whiskey!

[BienvenuJDC]

Ummm, what cup, sir? :confused:


I believe that he was referring to the cup of green tea!! ;)

[Silas Thorne]

Can anyone shoot around here, or do I have to get the duelling sabre out of the games room?

[LostPrincess13]

Can anyone shoot around here, or do I have to get the duelling sabre out of the games room?

Are you going to get that weasel?:D

[BienvenuJDC]

**takes LostPrincess out to see the weasel and looks up to see the meteor shower**

Look up...Wow!! That looks awesome...
http://www.aftertek.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/11/leonid-meteor-shower.jpg

[Silas Thorne]

Ok then...

I get a dart from the dartboard, kneel down and throw it underhand, impaling the weasel through the throat and lifting it a few feet up in the air, twitching and pinned against the wall.

'Sorry about the mess!' I shout, as blood trickles onto the floor from its throat, all over the floor.

But luckily the bottle topples over intact, and I put it back on the bar.

[BienvenuJDC]

Ok then...

I get a dart from the dartboard, kneel down and throw it underhand, impaling the weasel through the throat and lifting it a few feet up in the air, twitching and pinned against the wall.

'Sorry about the mess!' I shout, as blood trickles onto the floor from its throat, all over the floor.

We have a new dart champion!!

Don't worry...I'll take care of the clean-up. Does anybody have a good recipe for weasel?? :D

[LostPrincess13]

**takes LostPrincess out to see the weasel and looks up to see the meteor shower**

Look up...Wow!! That looks awesome...
http://www.aftertek.com/wp-content/uploads/2006/11/leonid-meteor-shower.jpg


Ok then...

I get a dart from the dartboard, kneel down and throw it underhand, impaling the weasel through the throat and lifting it a few feet up in the air, twitching and pinned against the wall.

'Sorry about the mess!' I shout, as blood trickles onto the floor from its throat, all over the floor.

Awwww! Thanks you guys! That was awfully nice of you!:D Although, I was kinda thinking of keeping the weasel as a pet...:p Oh well...:p


But luckily the bottle topples over intact, and I put it back on the bar.

Thanks very much Silas! That's lucky, I found the bottle in front of the establishment this morning. A gift form a stranger...:)


We have a new dart champion!!

Don't worry...I'll take care of the clean-up. Does anybody have a good recipe for weasel?? :D

:banana: Yey Silas! :banana: And thanks JDC!:D The cleaning materials are in the supply closet.:) The stain removal liquid was endorsed by Jerry Seinfeld.:)

[prendrelemick]

Now the Cricket season is upon us, perhaps we could organise a match against The Groucho or Whites. I would certainly be up for it, I've bowled many a maiden over with my googlies.

I've also got a slow arm over the wicket Chinaman that has bamboozled many a blue.



Lets see what Google translater makes of that one, eh

[The Atheist]

I've also got a slow arm over the wicket Chinaman that has bamboozled many a blue.

Lets see what Google translater makes of that one, eh

Nice!

[Silas Thorne]

I've bowled many a maiden over with my googlies.

:lol:

[Lokasenna]

If I may say, having just checked this thread for the first time today, you all appear to have gone completely insane!

Weasels, meteors and googlies... I'm confused and vaguely terrified...

[Michael T]

If I may say, having just checked this thread for the first time today, you all appear to have gone completely insane!

Weasels, meteors and googlies... I'm confused and vaguely terrified...

It's all this free-flowing alcohol...Hic! :sick:

[Silas Thorne]

You know, they're keeping a tab. They know where you live, Michael.

[Niamh]

But only if you are wearing flack jackets and steel helmets. The same goes for those attending an Irish wedding.

:eek: I'm insulted!

[Michael T]

Best I put a little something behind the bar then Silas! :D


http://www.b2ctraining.co.uk/fifty_pound_note1.jpg


That should keep the Management happy. ;)

[Scheherazade]

That should keep the Management happy. ;)Do you think you could actually "buy" the Management like that?

*pushes the money under the counter swiftly*

However, it might help you keep the thread open for a little longer...

;)

[Michael T]

However, it might help you keep the thread open for a little longer...

;)


My round then! :D

[LostPrincess13]

Now the Cricket season is upon us, perhaps we could organise a match against The Groucho or Whites. I would certainly be up for it, I've bowled many a maiden over with my googlies.

I've also got a slow arm over the wicket Chinaman that has bamboozled many a blue.

Lets see what Google translater makes of that one, eh

*at a complete loss* Um, is there a certain language that only men can understand?:confused:


If I may say, having just checked this thread for the first time today, you all appear to have gone completely insane!

Weasels, meteors and googlies... I'm confused and vaguely terrified...

*giggles* Not to worry Loki!:D Everything's fine. Just a little pest control.:D Though I'm curious to know how the weasel got in here...


It's all this free-flowing alcohol...Hic! :sick:

Looks like someone has exceeded his alcohol limit!;) Might I suggest coffee instead?;)


Best I put a little something behind the bar then Silas! :D


http://www.b2ctraining.co.uk/fifty_pound_note1.jpg


That should keep the Management happy. ;)


My round then! :D

That's very generous of you!:D That'll take care of the damage the weasel caused...:D

[Emil Miller]

:eek: I'm insulted!


I'm quite upset that you feel offended so to cheer you up I have a little Irish joke for you.

Taking a wee break from the golf circuit, Tiger Woods drives his new Buick Rendezvous into an Irish petrol station. An attendant greets him in a typical Irish manner, unaware who the driver is.."top o'the mornin to ya".

As Tiger gets out of the car, two golfing tees fall out of his pocket.

"So what are those, son?" ask the attendant.

"They're called tees," replied Tiger.

"And what would ya be usin 'em for, now?" inquired the Irishman.

"Well, they're for resting my balls on when I drive," replied Tiger.

"Aw, Jaysus, Mary and' Joseph!" exclaimed the Irish attendant. "Those fellas at Buick think of everything!"

[Niamh]

:lol:

[skib]

Quickly skib, get the rifle. Be careful, try not to hit the whiskey!

*runs into the room with deer rifle, sweating*
Whew! I got here as quick as I could! What's the problem?
*notices dead weasel*
Oh, wow . . . there's a weasel pinned to the dartboard . . .

[Emil Miller]

For our Antipodean members I would draw attention to an item in my evening newspaper headed "Topless pub ' insult to our troops.' " It would appear that the Kersbrook Tavern in Adelaide plans to introduce topless barmaids on Australia's rememberance day as a boy's treat to boost business. Veterans have said it is an affront to Anzac Day's annual national memorial to the fIrst World War. What are the members views on topless barmaids?

[skib]

I don't see a problem with it at all. Will there be a topless lawnmower race afterward?

[Michael T]

What are the members views on topless barmaids?

As close a one as I can possibly get! :D

[BienvenuJDC]

*runs into the room with deer rifle, sweating*
Whew! I got here as quick as I could! What's the problem?
*notices dead weasel*
Oh, wow . . . there's a weasel pinned to the dartboard . . .

Silas!!?? Another Weasel? I put the last one in the stew.

[Silas Thorne]

For our Antipodean members I would draw attention to an item in my evening newspaper headed "Topless pub ' insult to our troops.' " It would appear that the Kersbrook Tavern in Adelaide plans to introduce topless barmaids on Australia's rememberance day as a boy's treat to boost business. Veterans have said it is an affront to Anzac Day's annual national memorial to the fIrst World War. What are the members views on topless barmaids?

Of course I would like a view.:D

Soldiers object to topless barmaids!? What is the world coming to?
I'm sure the young soldiers wouldn't object. :)

[prendrelemick]

I hope Aunty peggy, the septagenarian barmaid at our local doesn't get any ideas!

[Emil Miller]

If any of the members are in Adelaide on Anzac day and don't which of the city's pubs is the Kersbrook Tavern, it will be the one with a two mile queue outside.

[prendrelemick]

*runs into the room with deer rifle, sweating*
Whew! I got here as quick as I could! What's the problem?
*notices dead weasel*
Oh, wow . . . there's a weasel pinned to the dartboard . . .



Too late Skib. But keep the rifle handy, I noticed Bambi loitering with intent round the back.

[skib]

Too late Skib. But keep the rifle handy, I noticed Bambi loitering with intent round the back.

On guard day and ni . . . zzzzzzzzz

[BienvenuJDC]

Too late Skib. But keep the rifle handy, I noticed Bambi loitering with intent round the back.

skib...I think some venison would go quite well on the menu!
http://4imgs.com/410/x/flof005_FULL.jpghttp://static.deliaonline.com/images/width150/venison-19613.jpg
http://www.beaudesertparkfarm.co.uk/layout/photos/vension-stew.jpg

[skib]

I was just thinking that! A bit of tenderloin grilled to perfection, a loaf of homemade bread, a wee bit of salad smothered in Italian dressing and french-fried onions . . . my mouth is watering already.
PS- somebody throw a few pounds of sweet corn out back for that pesky little deer, and make sure nobody bothers him for a few weeks. ;)

[BienvenuJDC]

I couldn't find any sweet corn, but we can see if this corn,
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~jeffreym/9gifs/SS8.jpg

a bucket of water with a bit of molasses...
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~jeffreym/9gifs/ss2a.jpg

some apple cider...
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~jeffreym/9gifs/ss2b.jpg

a bit of vanilla...
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~jeffreym/9gifs/ss2c.jpg

and some apples...
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~jeffreym/9gifs/ss5.jpg

[prendrelemick]

Silas!!?? Another Weasel? I put the last one in the stew.


Aw, thats disgusting, how could you?









Kababs would've been so much nicer :p

[skib]

Bien, you're absolutely genius!

[BienvenuJDC]

Aw, thats disgusting, how could you?


Kababs would've been so much nicer :p

Well? Pull the other one off the dart board and grab a skewer!!

http://www.recipetips.com/images/glossary/s/skewer_meat3.jpg

[Janine]

:lol: talking about dark boards and skewers today, eh?

I love Kababs; and those are the skewers I use, Bien, disposable with no cleanup; easy!

[BienvenuJDC]

So...you like skewered weasel too!!

[prendrelemick]

:lol: talking about dark boards and skewers today, eh?

I love Kababs; and those are the skewers I use, Bien, disposable with no cleanup; easy!

Hang on a minute, you mean people (females) go into shops and actually assess the relative merits of different types of skewer?

[BienvenuJDC]

I guess so...I was thinking that they were just sticks...with a pointy end that wouldn't splinter in my mouth. I'd probably prefer stainless steel that are reusable...but that's that...

[Silas Thorne]

:lol:

[BienvenuJDC]

That one's gonna get too done on that side...shouldn't someone turn it over?

[skib]

Don't worry, Bien! I've got it covered.

[BienvenuJDC]

Don't worry, Bien! I've got it covered.

:lol: I didn't want it covered!!

[Silas Thorne]

:D Hey...you sure this wasn't an outtake of the Ewok's village in the Return of the Jedi? Or have I been eating too much datura?

[Emil Miller]

[QUOTE=Michael T;710652]Those are too small for some of the critters we catch that have wandered into The Blokes' Thread!

I was about to say something highly amusing about this post but we musn't give the moderators ( mostly feminine ) a chance to close down the Blokes' thread.

[Silas Thorne]

A few hours later....

http://z.about.com/d/easteuropeanfood/1/0/Q/8/-/-/lambroast14.jpg

Good thing that apple kept the screaming down. It would have been hard to have a decent conversation. :D

[Stargazer86]

Looks tasty. Might I pull up for a piece of thigh and a cold Guinness?

[Silas Thorne]

OK...Just put on this cap and hide the hair...I can't guarantee the guys are full yet. :)

[Emil Miller]

A few hours later....

http://z.about.com/d/easteuropeanfood/1/0/Q/8/-/-/lambroast14.jpg

Good thing that apple kept the screaming down. It would have been hard to have a decent conversation. :D

I see you have taken the best part.

[Stargazer86]

*puts on cap and fake moustache* How do I look? Dashing and masculine, I hope

[Janine]

I will take a drumstick. Yikes, the Bloke's thread has now degenerated into the realm of canablism! What next? :lol:

[BienvenuJDC]

**Pulls up chair waiting for Classics response...**

Bring me something non-alcoholic...I want to be alert for this! Besides...I always get something non-alcoholic! What's on tap?

[The Atheist]

I was about to say something highly amusing about this post but we musn't give the moderators ( mostly feminine ) a chance to close down the Blokes' thread.


Those are too small for some of the critters we catch that have wandered into The Blokes' Thread!

Ouch!

Very funny, but I think we do need to remove that pic.

Cheers

[skib]

**Pulls up chair waiting for Classics response...**

Bring me something non-alcoholic...I want to be alert for this! Besides...I always get something non-alcoholic! What's on tap?

I heard something about there being some Becks and St. Pauli Girl hiding in the back room . . . *sniffs and turns up nose*

[BienvenuJDC]

Nah...doesn't interest me...I'll just have coffee!!

[skib]

That works as well! No Bailey's, I assume?

[Niamh]

That works as well! No Bailey's, I assume?

Baileys would be considered as alcohol....:p

[Michael T]

Ouch!

Very funny, but I think we do need to remove that pic.

Cheers
Hi Atheist. In response to your private message, I think my original picture of the girl was just rather comical, fitted within the context of the ongoing thread, and was not too revealing. I even received a message from a female member saying how funny she found it. I find it hard to imagine that my picture and comment would, in itself, have caused any offence to members of the forum. I would be interested to know how many other members of the forum other than you, did, in fact, find my original post to be offensive?
That being said, I will now remove my post from the thread.
Kind regards,
Michael.
P.S. I couldn't figure out how to delete the post, so just removed the content. I'd appreciate it if someone could let me know how to delete a post. :)

[Virgil]

Gosh, I keep coming here hoping for more pictures of scantily clad women and all I find is talk about cooking. I could go to the girl's thread for home econimics. :D

[Emil Miller]

Gosh, I keep coming here hoping for more pictures of scantily clad women and all I find is talk about cooking. I could go to the girl's thread for home econimics. :D

Sorry Virgil, it wasn't so much the scantily clad young lady but the cooking that has decided us to remove the the picture.
Actually, the picture would have been better posted on the 'What's cooking tonight' thread ?

Now chaps, do as Virgil suggests and lets have more girls and less cooking?

[Lokasenna]

Yes, the cooking is not attractive. Grace Kelly, however:

http://www.geocities.com/gracekelly6/grace_kelly.jpg

Very few women today seem to have elegance and class... they don't make 'em like they used to!

[Michael T]

Yes, the cooking is not attractive. Grace Kelly, however:



Very few women today seem to have elegance and class... they don't make 'em like they used to!



Not every picture tells a story. Her on-screen persona did indeed exude elegance and class. However, a close look at her private life prior to her marriage would suggest she was a bit of a s***. Still, let’s not hold that against her! :)

[Emil Miller]

Not every picture tells a story. Her on-screen persona did indeed exude elegance and class. However, a close look at her private life prior to her marriage would suggest she was a bit of a s***. Still, let’s not hold that against her! :)

She was said to have had an extraordinary sexual appetite. Unfortunately
I wasn't one of the lucky guys.

[Michael T]

[QUOTE=Brian Bean;710960]She was said to have had an extraordinary sexual appetite. Unfortunately
I wasn't one of the lucky guys.[/QUOTE


I fear we may have burst young Lokasenna’s bubble! ;)

[Lokasenna]

[QUOTE=Brian Bean;710960]She was said to have had an extraordinary sexual appetite. Unfortunately
I wasn't one of the lucky guys.[/QUOTE


I fear we may have burst young Lokasenna’s bubble! ;)

:lol:

[prendrelemick]

So thats why Prince Rainier often wore a tired smile.

[Emil Miller]

So thats why Prince Rainier often wore a tired smile.

Yeah, but by the time he got there he was standing at the head of a long line of tired smilers.

[prendrelemick]

A bit strong to call her a s**t though, she was just a very giving person.
Like mother Teresa, only in a different field.

[Virgil]

I don't know Loki, that's just too classy for a thread like this. I was thinking more along the lines of this:

http://cache.kotaku.com/gaming/images/rockonantonia.jpg

:D:D

[Stargazer86]

Those chicks have no asses! C'mon, let's see some curve
holy crap, that one on the left is pretty beefy