Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread! [Archive] - Page 13

soundofmusic

06-10-2010, 07:53 PM

Since we were recently on the subject of Prince Charles, check this (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-1285332/Follow-Islamic-way-save-world-Charles-urges-environmentalists.html) out.

Especially the picture of actual students.

:D

They all have that look, "Yep, he's went the way of his dad". Is he able to squander the countries money or can he just kill you slowly with boredom?

Sorry, chaps, I'd love to contribute but I haven't got the time - I've got to do the washing up, then take the wife to Sainsbury's, and then write a thesis on what we blokes can do better than women. So far, the only thing I've come up with is the ability to wee in a milk bottle. Sorry, got to go.......she's calling again!!!!

If you will give me the order, General Jocky, Sir, :gnorsi:I will check out this dafy, chap or lass, to ensure that he/she can indeed wee in a bottle....

If you are on the up and up, sir, I can give you at least 5 things that a man can do better than a woman...
1. The first, is why most women want a man...they make more money:lol:
2. They are cheaper and more fun than a sperm bank:ladysman:
3. They can pull the cord of gasoline operated lawn equipment.
4. They can get things from the attic crawl space.
5. They are the first line of defense when something scary is outside the house or a large spider is on the ceiling...:thumbsup:

OrphanPip

06-10-2010, 09:52 PM

3. They can pull the cord of gasoline operated lawn equipment.
4. They can get things from the attic crawl space.
5. They are the first line of defense when something scary is outside the house or a large spider is on the ceiling...:thumbsup:

If only the men I've dated had these skills, most of them only excelled at fixing their hair. Although, I do love beautiful hair, so I suppose that's alright.

prendrelemick

06-11-2010, 01:35 AM

dafydd manton

06-11-2010, 05:19 AM

My apologies for the wimpish posts earlier, I'd been at the metal polish - strained through a sock, of course. In reality, I am the boss in our household, and I've got her permission to say so!

prendrelemick

06-11-2010, 05:27 AM

Did you find the special offer on Marigolds? Sainsbury's are so good on cleaning products -er according to Mrs P that is.

dafydd manton

06-11-2010, 09:13 AM

Yes, dammit, they didn't have pink! To go with my eyes, you understand, after having consumed blokey amounts of Aur Cymru Welsh whisky. I buy a bottle every time the Welsh Rugby XV win a Grand Slam. I don't seem to buy much, these days!!

Paulclem

06-11-2010, 10:45 AM

I'm the dishwasher too in our house. I have it down to an art with different techniques for different levels and substances of burnt.

dafydd manton

06-11-2010, 12:33 PM

It's also amazing what macho sculptures you can make with a handful of Fairy Liquid bubbles and a cereal bowl - my neighbour, Bert, tells me!

The Atheist

06-11-2010, 05:02 PM

My apologies for the wimpish posts earlier, I'd been at the metal polish - strained through a sock, of course. In reality, I am the boss in our household, and I've got her permission to say so!

That's more bloody like it!

Now that you've regained your manliness, I'll be expecting you lend a hand when we pull the 457 out of the Falcon this arvo and jack it into a Toyota Starlet. After that, I have three cubic metres of concrete to mix & barrow.

Did you find the special offer on Marigolds? Sainsbury's are so good on cleaning products -er according to Mrs P that is.

*splutter*

!

I buy a bottle every time the Welsh Rugby XV win a Grand Slam. I don't seem to buy much, these days!!

Lucky you don't buy it after wins over the All Blacks. There'd only be three blokes in all Wales who remember what it tastes like.

:D

soundofmusic

06-11-2010, 06:36 PM

If only the men I've dated had these skills, most of them only excelled at fixing their hair. Although, I do love beautiful hair, so I suppose that's alright.
I haven't found all 5 in any one man either; I, also value beautiful hair and body above a challenging intellect...I fight my own spiders, call the police on scary strangers and buy electric lawn equipment. I don't care so much about the sperm bank as long as they're always open for business:lol:

Oh look, they've put a picture of bored students after one of Prince Charles.

Another illusion destroyed:sad:

It's also amazing what macho sculptures you can make with a handful of Fairy Liquid bubbles and a cereal bowl - my neighbour, Bert, tells me!

I guess you're a good bloke, the true test is the marigolds, only men will plant them instead of a nice rose or chrysanthemum. I also have to commend you on a beautiful avatar and your subtle self promotion:thumbsup:

I'm the dishwasher too in our house. I have it down to an art with different techniques for different levels and substances of burnt.

You will have to write a column for that...particularly the plasticware; or do people do plastic ware in the UK. I can never get the spagetti sauce stains out of the Gladware.

[QUOTE=The Atheist;908975]

I am copying that Aussie dictionary...great work;)

dafydd manton

06-11-2010, 06:43 PM

Subtle self promotion? I thought it was about as subtle as a flying Dingo! Strewth - I'm slipping.

soundofmusic

06-11-2010, 06:47 PM

Subtle self promotion? I thought it was about as subtle as a flying Dingo! Strewth - I'm slipping.

I'm from the states, the southern section; here, self promotion starts with a mallet:smash:

dafydd manton

06-11-2010, 06:50 PM

Ah! We're more subtle in Europe. We generally start with an iron bar, then move on to the cricket bat, the hand grenade then the bon mot, not necessarily in that order.

soundofmusic

06-11-2010, 06:58 PM

Ah! We're more subtle in Europe. We generally start with an iron bar, then move on to the cricket bat, the hand grenade then the bon mot, not necessarily in that order.

The Europeans I've met usually start by dazzling me with the bon mot; therefore, I'd hardly notice if a grenade exploded anywhere near me;)

dafydd manton

06-11-2010, 06:59 PM

Then you're in luck, since I haven't got one. Have you seen the price of Grenades lately? Shocking!

soundofmusic

06-11-2010, 08:31 PM

Then you're in luck, since I haven't got one. Have you seen the price of Grenades lately? Shocking!

Well, here in America, we don't buy from the Army/Navy or even black market; we trade with the local urchins for a few smokes and the left over gin from friday night (they mix it with mountain dew):reddevil:

prendrelemick

06-12-2010, 02:09 AM

Thinking deeply on supermarkets, Asda is the only one with refuge aisles for blokes. Ok Tesco and Sainburys may have a token can of WD40 or engine oil tucked away among the feminine requisites, but only at Asda can a man roam with dignity and purpose among electronic gizmos, books and car wax. Only there can he proclaim," you go on ahead dear I just need to look at this." and get away with it.

dafydd manton

06-12-2010, 05:40 AM

Could this be something to do with it now being owned by Walmart, a company itself run by a BLOKE, not some profit-driven wimp in red braces and overly shiny shoes? There is a special skill in being able to inspect a single adjustable spanner for the entire length of time that 'Er Indoors fills a trolley with frozen comestibles. If only they'd stock spark plugs, I could spend all day in there.

Paulclem

06-12-2010, 04:50 PM

We've got a big Tescos and a big Sainsburys. The Sainsburys, which is near to us has book, DVDs, electronics,tellies and a cafe. Superb.

dafydd manton

06-12-2010, 05:06 PM

prendrelemick

06-13-2010, 04:00 AM

Ahh the Austin Allegro, the Morris Marina. How did they get away with it for so long?

Mind you, I had some interesting times on the back seat of an Austin 1100.:thumbsup:

dafydd manton

06-13-2010, 07:09 AM

Ahh the Austin Allegro, the Morris Marina. How did they get away with it for so long?

Mind you, I had some interesting times on the back seat of an Austin 1100.:thumbsup:

One assumes that you're referring to the hydrolastic suspension!!!

prendrelemick

06-13-2010, 07:29 AM

Aye, you could experience seasickness on dry land.
Norris' (yes I did name my first car) Hydrolastic suspension used to settle on the nearside front, and had to be pumped up every fortnight. He had an aroma of rotting carpet and fungal growth that you just dont get in cars since the demise of Brithish Leyland. In the end the rear subframe rotted off and came away from the rest of the car. He was crushed. (literally.)

Paulclem

06-13-2010, 07:30 AM

Yes, but does it have spark plugs? You'd think so, with the close proximity of Ryton, once the hub of the British motor industry, where I can remember row upon row of Allegros that nobody was ever going to buy, number-plateless, but still rusting.

Alas a wasteland for sparkplugs - or is it? Books DVDs CDs are surely more interesting. I may be biased though as I don't drive. :lol:

dafydd manton

06-13-2010, 08:01 AM

Gilliatt Gurgle

06-13-2010, 08:18 AM

...and shamelessly throw about abbreviations that mean little or nothing. 2 degrees BTDC, that kind of thing. CDs and DVDs are more for the non-cognescenti, ...

"2 degrees BTDC" - My timing may be a bit off, but I always keep a bottle of Wild Turkey 101 top dead center of my liquor cabinet. The "B" threw me for a moment...B for British?(maybe it was a metric approach), B for "before" ? I'll wager it's "before"

My formative years were spent in a 1966 Volkswagen Beatle. Our German neighbors brought it with them form the homeland. It eventually made it's way into our hands.

Gilliatt

Paulclem

06-13-2010, 12:59 PM

Ah, yes, well, the Brotherhood of the Spark Plug is a sort of Masonic Conglomerate for car geeks, where we can swap stories in arcane language that nobody else can understand, and shamelessly throw about abbreviations that mean little or nothing. 2 degrees BTDC, that kind of thing. CDs and DVDs are more for the non-cognescenti, although we don't eschew them, once it has got too dark/cold/frustrating to work on the car, doing jobs that don't need doing, so that we can go back and correct it the following week.

I remember two blokes in our steet when I was a kid. They spent the weekend faffing with and revving the engine, only to be back again next week dong the same. I don't know why they had cars - they never seemed to go out in them.

:lol:

dafydd manton

06-13-2010, 03:09 PM

That's probably because they messed around with them so much, they wouldn't have run even if you'd wanted them to. Gilliat, you're dead right, "before". I have no idea what Wild Turkey is, although I can take a guess, and it sounds a sight more interesting than carburettors and ignition timing. After a sufficient amount of something 70 proof, you can talk about engines all night without knowing the first thing about them. I've built a reputation on it!!

Jesterhead

06-13-2010, 04:44 PM

You've either got the greatest mom alive; or she is using reverse psychology.
Have you ever told her you were serious about a woman? I found my parents liked all my boyfriends until they became husbands...

Very nice Edward look alike...and better hair...I wonder how much it'll cost to send him by crate to Florida:lol:

Haha maybe she is just acting nice, until I marry someone.

I have already packed him up ready to send him to you:lol:

That gets my vote as well!

I have always had a weakness for blondes. That's possibly why I'm married to one.

Gentlemen prefer blondes.

And as I always say, so do dirty old men!

Can you guess which group I'm in?

Maybe gentleman by day, and dirty old man by night :P

dafydd manton

06-13-2010, 04:54 PM

Gentlemen prefer blondes (and I'm married to one), but do blondes prefer gentlemen? Would I class myself as a gentleman? Hmmmmm

The Atheist

06-13-2010, 07:19 PM

Ahh the Austin Allegro, the Morris Marina. How did they get away with it for so long?

Mind you, I had some interesting times on the back seat of an Austin 1100.:thumbsup:

I've owned all three of those in my life, and a Morris 1800, which just happens to be one the best cars ever made. I used to kill my mates' Cortinas and Capris in the dirt - front wheel drive rules!

Maybe gentleman by day, and dirty old man by night :P

The latter all the time!

:D

Gentlemen prefer blondes (and I'm married to one), but do blondes prefer gentlemen? Would I class myself as a gentleman? Hmmmmm

I think they actually prefer non-gentlemen.

As evidence, I offer, Marilyn Monroe and Jack Kennedy, Rod Stewart and all his blonde wives, Bonnie Parker & Clyde Barrow...

The Atheist

06-14-2010, 09:45 PM

I must note that I spent yesterday afternoon preparing dinner while Mrs Atheist sat and chatted to guests.

Home made steak and vegetable pies, as it happens, and bloody delicious they were!

soundofmusic

06-15-2010, 12:50 PM

Haha maybe she is just acting nice, until I marry someone.

I have already packed him up ready to send him to you:lol:

Maybe gentleman by day, and dirty old man by night :P

It's hard to say; my daughter tells me that it was a good thing I never had a biological son; that I would have chaperoned him on every date...I think she's being a little harsh. I have noticed, having married eldest sons twice, there always seemed a bit of wierd competition between mother and daughter in law: they had this wierd timing: calling at dinner time or when we were in bed:flare:

My very own Edward; I don't know whether I'll ever leave the house again:lol:

Gentlemen prefer blondes (and I'm married to one), but do blondes prefer gentlemen? Would I class myself as a gentleman? Hmmmmm

I don't know if they would notice whether you're a gentleman; I find I'm utterly dazzled by your vocabulary...you could steal a ladies garter with that stuff:willy_nilly::ihih:

I think they actually prefer non-gentlemen.

As evidence, I offer, Marilyn Monroe and Jack Kennedy, Rod Stewart and all his blonde wives, Bonnie Parker & Clyde Barrow...

I think the thing with cads is they are disarmingly sweet and gentlemanly at first meeting
Dirty old ladies prefer blonds too:drool5:

I must note that I spent yesterday afternoon preparing dinner while Mrs Atheist sat and chatted to guests.

Home made steak and vegetable pies, as it happens, and bloody delicious they were!

Sounds excellent...did you want to talk to the guests or were you retreating to the kitchen. I used to hide in my kitchen when my husband brought his friends with wives who wanted to discuss birthing methods:thumbsup:

The Atheist

06-15-2010, 03:08 PM

I think the thing with cads is they are disarmingly sweet and gentlemanly at first meeting
Dirty old ladies prefer blonds too:drool5:

Haha!

When my cloning machine is fully operational, I'll clone a few of your avatar bloke for you!

They come in designer options like "No vocal chords", "Housework lover" and that kind of thing.

Sounds excellent...did you want to talk to the guests or were you retreating to the kitchen. I used to hide in my kitchen when my husband brought his friends with wives who wanted to discuss birthing methods:thumbsup:

I get the best of both worlds, the kitchen is only separated by a bar from the lounge, so I was mixing pastry and chatting.

To be honest, I am a bit of a show-off Gordon Ramsay type in the kitchen.

The language can be similar as well!

:lol:

prendrelemick

06-15-2010, 04:05 PM

:( Mrs P doesn't consider any social event a success unless at least one good childbirth horror story has been graphically retold.:(

dafydd manton

06-15-2010, 04:40 PM

There's something about the female of the species, and especially in Yorkshire, where a day without, as you say, a childbirth incident, a discussion about somebody's health, ('e's not bin well, t'lad) or a graphic account of an operation has been wasted. Tha knows.

Paulclem

06-15-2010, 05:15 PM

Aye - fistula an' piles they 'ad. T'wer a terrible shame when the' got ''thrush an' all...

dafydd manton

06-15-2010, 05:30 PM

Nah den, luv, does that want ter see me operation scar? Ah 'ad one o' them hysterical rectums, tha knows!

Jesterhead

06-15-2010, 05:46 PM

It's hard to say; my daughter tells me that it was a good thing I never had a biological son; that I would have chaperoned him on every date...I think she's being a little harsh. I have noticed, having married eldest sons twice, there always seemed a bit of wierd competition between mother and daughter in law: they had this wierd timing: calling at dinner time or when we were in bed:flare:

haha that was on purpose xD

My very own Edward; I don't know whether I'll ever leave the house again:lol

He will make you feel like Bella.. by that I mean stare at you while you are sleeping.

dafydd manton

06-15-2010, 05:53 PM

Two old Yorkshire lasses chatting.
"Our Elsie's 'ad t'babby, burrit weren't a real 'un. She 'ad one o' them Caesarean Sexuals, tha knows."
"Is that what thiy do ter mek t'cattle pregnant?"
"Nao, luv, that's called Artifical Incrimination. Thiy do it wi' a syringe!"
"Nivver!"
"Ar, straight up, no Bull!"

The Atheist

06-15-2010, 07:50 PM

:( Mrs P doesn't consider any social event a success unless at least one good childbirth horror story has been graphically retold.:(

I have four kids and four different horror stories if you're keen!

Nah den, luv, does that want ter see me operation scar? Ah 'ad one o' them hysterical rectums, tha knows!

:lol:

Classic stuff!

prendrelemick

06-16-2010, 01:37 AM

Nah den, luv, does that want ter see me operation scar? Ah 'ad one o' them hysterical rectums, tha knows!

I see you haven't lost your ear for the Welsh accent there dafydd :p

dafydd manton

06-16-2010, 04:43 AM

Ah, yes, well, my wife is from Yorkshire, as is my Mother-in-law who lives with us. In fact, I'm working on translating one of my (less successful) books in to a Yorkshire dialect. Whistle affter see, flower!

The Atheist

06-16-2010, 09:38 PM

I've given Parker his annual leave for a fortnight - looks like the football is keeping them inside at night!

dafydd manton

06-17-2010, 08:31 AM

Capital, old boy. Bang on. Good show, what? Spiffing. Yes. Ha!

soundofmusic

06-17-2010, 12:56 PM

Haha!

When my cloning machine is fully operational, I'll clone a few of your avatar bloke for you!

They come in designer options like "No vocal chords", "Housework lover" and that kind of thing.

I get the best of both worlds, the kitchen is only separated by a bar from the lounge, so I was mixing pastry and chatting.

To be honest, I am a bit of a show-off Gordon Ramsay type in the kitchen.

:lol:

No wonder you are able to keep a hot young blonde wife, Don Juan in the bedroom and Gordon Ramsay in the kitchen:drool5:
I have a few others you can clone for me at the same time: the housework lover sounds good; but I like them with vocal chords so they can gasp at my beauty and make a few guttural sounds

:( Mrs P doesn't consider any social event a success unless at least one good childbirth horror story has been graphically retold.:(

Exactly what I mean! Even when men do talk pregnancy and kids, or the occasional pulled groin or tennis elbow; it's amusing rather than gross.

There's something about the female of the species, and especially in Yorkshire, where a day without, as you say, a childbirth incident, a discussion about somebody's health, ('e's not bin well, t'lad) or a graphic account of an operation has been wasted. Tha knows.

I prefered the days when women gossiped about affairs and the neighbors leaving windows open...

Aye - fistula an' piles they 'ad. T'wer a terrible shame when the' got ''thrush an' all...

:iagree::lol:

haha that was on purpose xD

He will make you feel like Bella.. by that I mean stare at you while you are sleeping.

They most certainly did! We had cold meals and interupted bedroom time for a year!
I think I want the Edward after the Bella transformation...more for the buck; particularly since I'm paying shipping..

Two old Yorkshire lasses chatting.
"Our Elsie's 'ad t'babby, burrit weren't a real 'un. She 'ad one o' them Caesarean Sexuals, tha knows."
"Is that what thiy do ter mek t'cattle pregnant?"
"Nao, luv, that's called Artifical Incrimination. Thiy do it wi' a syringe!"
"Nivver!"
"Ar, straight up, no Bull!"

:lol::smilielol5::smilielol5:

dafydd manton

06-17-2010, 01:11 PM

'Ere, whilst we're on the subject of the opposite sex, so named because they are generally opposed to everything we might do, why do you see so many ugly ones coming out of beauty parlours?

The Atheist

06-17-2010, 02:01 PM

Exactly what I mean! Even when men do talk pregnancy and kids, or the occasional pulled groin or tennis elbow; it's amusing rather than gross.

Blokes do less detail than women. I've never heard men discussing how many stitches their vasectomies took as a matter of pride.

'Ere, whilst we're on the subject of the opposite sex, so named because they are generally opposed to everything we might do, why do you see so many ugly ones coming out of beauty parlours?

:lol:

Paulclem

06-17-2010, 04:50 PM

It's a common misconception that - like a house - a lick of emulsion and some gloss on the skirting make beauty...

The Atheist

06-17-2010, 04:56 PM

Just in case any of the chaps are travelling in the next little while:

It won't affect too many of us, being of the wrong generation, but any of our younger members - so to speak - would be well advised to avoid Christchurch Airport Customs in the interim.

http://www.stuff.co.nz/national/3825801/Gay-claims-in-Customs-strip-search-court-case

dafydd manton

06-17-2010, 05:57 PM

Just cancelled the trip to New Zealand - not because of any bias, but I'm told that all 127 of them have gone to South Africa, for reason or reasons unknown.

jocky

06-17-2010, 07:54 PM

Guys and gal I have got myself in a moral morass and your suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Me and my faithfull hound Turncoat were out for our early morning walk when, all of a sudden, Mutley's hair stood on end and he started howling and shaking in front of a shiny object. On closer inspection it turned out to be a crocodile skinned wallet. In character I scanned the landscape 360 degrees and shoved it in my pooch. When we got home I opened it and discovered £5000 in fifty pound notes and no identification of ownership, what could I do ? I showed it to Mrs Jocky, big mistake. She pointed out that it could be a pensioners life savings or, even worse a drug dealers stash." Darling I can't hand it in for altruistic reasons and besides we are broke". Helpfull suggestions would be welcome. :)

The Atheist

06-17-2010, 09:33 PM

Oh, if only I had that kind of luck!

Fair go, half and half for you and 'er indoors.

OrphanPip

06-17-2010, 09:43 PM

Gilliatt Gurgle

06-17-2010, 10:11 PM

prendrelemick

06-18-2010, 01:51 AM

The Atheist

06-18-2010, 03:17 AM

Thank goodness ! I was wondering where my wallet had got to.

:lol:

Isn't yours the one covered in cobwebs with 50p in it?

(Mine doesn't even have 50p!)

dafydd manton

06-18-2010, 04:39 AM

50 whole pence?? Egad!! Riches beyond the dreams of Creosote!! (He was the deity they put up against a wall!)

jocky

06-18-2010, 06:59 AM

Jocky, you trumped my next posting. I was about to present my quarterly update on the TBRC. There hasn’t been much activity other than a new article entered back in May, by a Bigfoot bounty hunter named Jerry Hestand. ---

http://www.texasbigfoot.org/index.php/news/news/48-news/176

Hmm…You know Jocky, donations are graciously accepted at TBRC. I wonder what the conversion rate is?

Gilliatt

You mean I have found Bigfoot's wallet ! This could lead to a spot on the Larry King show. Wait till I tell Mrs Jocky. :)

Thank goodness ! I was wondering where my wallet had got to.

You will recieve the wallet minus cash in the next post, C.O.D. naturally. Old Atheist has got you pegged. :)

50 whole pence?? Egad!! Riches beyond the dreams of Creosote!! (He was the deity they put up against a wall!)

:lol:
That's right he was the one that blessed my brand spanking new £5000 shed, or was it Crocus ? This plethora of Gods can lead to a great deal of confusion, not unusual for this thread, :)

dafydd manton

06-18-2010, 07:45 AM

Confusion? Wasn't he a Chinese philospher?

The Atheist

06-18-2010, 02:53 PM

Confusion? Wasn't he a Chinese philospher?

No, that was Wun Hung Lo.

dafydd manton

06-18-2010, 03:21 PM

Him and his brother Hoo Flung Dung?

The Atheist

06-18-2010, 04:32 PM

Him and his brother Hoo Flung Dung?

That's the guy!

Family philosophers, just like the Marx Bros.

prendrelemick

06-18-2010, 05:38 PM

Is that Karl and Groucho?

dafydd manton

06-18-2010, 06:07 PM

That's the ones - started Marx and Spencer, but they threw Harpo Spencer out because he wasn't very funny. Zippo went on to invent the cigarette lighter.

soundofmusic

06-18-2010, 10:09 PM

'Ere, whilst we're on the subject of the opposite sex, so named because they are generally opposed to everything we might do, why do you see so many ugly ones coming out of beauty parlours?

I worked in a department store years ago and everytime there was a makeup show, the girls would grab me. They would show the ladies, "Look at how drab this woman looks and with just a bit of our makeup....
The ladies would buy the whole set up; but the secret was good bones.

Blokes do less detail than women. I've never heard men discussing how many stitches their vasectomies took as a matter of pride.
:lol:

Ah yes, that is what makes blokes pleasant to be with...of course, I haven't quite figured out how to get more details when I'm dating one:idea:

It's a common misconception that - like a house - a lick of emulsion and some gloss on the skirting make beauty...

I've found with I and my house, as we get older, it's going to take a good deal of sanding and resurfacing to make us marketable:lol:

Guys and gal I have got myself in a moral morass and your suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Me and my faithfull hound Turncoat were out for our early morning walk when, all of a sudden, Mutley's hair stood on end and he started howling and shaking in front of a shiny object. On closer inspection it turned out to be a crocodile skinned wallet. In character I scanned the landscape 360 degrees and shoved it in my pooch. When we got home I opened it and discovered £5000 in fifty pound notes and no identification of ownership, what could I do ? I showed it to Mrs Jocky, big mistake. She pointed out that it could be a pensioners life savings or, even worse a drug dealers stash." Darling I can't hand it in for altruistic reasons and besides we are broke". Helpfull suggestions would be welcome. :)

Well, if I found a stashed wallet without ID, I would have to assume that it belonged to a thief or someone trading the money for an identity...I think, that since Mrs Jocky has some reservations about spending it; you should keep the whole bundle, except, of course, for what little bits you would like to donate to your friends on the blokes thread;)

Oh, if only I had that kind of luck!

Fair go, half and half for you and 'er indoors.

What a gent; I think I might talk her into putting her half in our joint checking:lol:

I'd have to see pictures of the custom officers beforehand, but sounds like the perfect way to spice up a trip.

Maybe you'll have better luck with those officers than I did; they let me pass in my leather teddy and a bag of Columbian gold...I guess it was the cellulite that put them off the scent:lol:

Thank goodness ! I was wondering where my wallet had got to.

Oh my god, is that wallet made out of an English croc...nothing meaner than an English croc:yikes:

Jocky, you trumped my next posting. I was about to present my quarterly update on the TBRC. There hasn’t been much activity other than a new article entered back in May, by a Bigfoot bounty hunter named Jerry Hestand. ---

Gilliatt
That was a smart move by Jerry, I'll bet he'll catch big foot using those school children as kibble:drool5:

Confusion? Wasn't he a Chinese philospher?
:confused:

No, that was Wun Hung Lo.
:brow::smilewinkgrin:

Him and his brother Hoo Flung Dung?
:sick::smilielol5:

That's the guy!

Family philosophers, just like the Marx Bros.
:crazy:

Is that Karl and Groucho?
:idea::cool:

That's the ones - started Marx and Spencer, but they threw Harpo Spencer out because he wasn't very funny. Zippo went on to invent the cigarette lighter.
:lol::biggrinjester:

prendrelemick

06-19-2010, 02:37 AM

Harpo Spencer, is that the bloke who got mugged in Govan by a man and a dog of his croc skin wallet and went on to write The fairy Quean before entering the New Zealand customs service?:rolleyes5:

Maybe you'll have better luck with those officers than I did; they let me pass in my leather teddy and a bag of Columbian gold...I guess it was the cellulite that put them off the scent:lol:

:

The mind boggles:lol::lol::lol:

The Atheist

06-19-2010, 05:03 AM

Crikey, we'll be on to Lord Lucan next!

jocky

06-19-2010, 07:07 AM

On the subject of Gods, there are three Eastern deities who have been most influential in my life, you may have heard of them, Guid Luk, Tuff Luk and Nae Luk. Of late the latter has been in the ascendancy. Atheist, Lord Lucan is alive and well and living in the Isle of Skye disguised as a Benedictine monk. :)

dafydd manton

06-19-2010, 07:23 AM

Not so! Lies! Foul Calumny! Lord Lucan is alive and well, wearing a ginger wig and working in a chip shop in Rochdale - you know the one, it's managed by Elvis. They do a very nice saveloy.

prendrelemick

06-19-2010, 10:22 AM

I know the one, Our Gracieland Chippy.

(you see what I did there?)

dafydd manton

06-19-2010, 10:29 AM

Ee, I'm impressed, lad. That were reight good! Pity there's no way of squeezing in the word "Fields", that'd really pull 'em in.

prendrelemick

06-19-2010, 12:30 PM

Never mind the saveloy, I go there because I love me (fish) tender.

Ok I'll stop now.

dafydd manton

06-19-2010, 12:33 PM

Sorry, I'm all shook up after the magnitude and brilliance of that one!

jocky

06-19-2010, 01:24 PM

Recently I have turned my mind to all things astronomical, so much so that I have converted my attic into an observatory, complete with the Meade ETX-LS 6" telescope.....man, that Heather Macpherson at number 42 sure looks hot in her skimpy white underwear embroidered with tiny red roses. She really needs to close her blinds at night, you never know who could be watching.... I digress, what was I on about, oh yes, Mrs Jocky paid a visit to my newly converted attic and after 5 minutes of silent observation remarked, " In the magnificence and wonderment of our Universe Mars looks comparitively tiny and insignificant. " I thought that was so profound I did not have the heart to tell her she was looking through the wrong end of the telescope. :)

prendrelemick

06-19-2010, 01:41 PM

I see you are an acolyte of that other Eastern deity, Sneaka Luk.

dafydd manton

06-19-2010, 02:13 PM

I see you are an acolyte of that other Eastern deity, Sneaka Luk.

:biggrin5: :nod: :biggrin5: :nod::nod::biggrin5:!!!!!!!!!!!!

The Atheist

06-19-2010, 03:32 PM

Recently I have turned my mind to all things astronomical, so much so that I have converted my attic into an observatory, complete with the Meade ETX-LS 6" telescope.....man, that Heather Macpherson at number 42 sure looks hot in her skimpy white underwear embroidered with tiny red roses. She really needs to close her blinds at night, you never know who could be watching....

Haha! If she knows you're living in the same county, I bet she does know who's watching - more care needed there or you'll be trying to do two birds with one stone!

Funny thing about humans: if they live at height, in an apartment block or on a hill, they forget that vision works two ways and that their magnificent view is busy watching them as they look at the view.

Tower crane drivers are aware of this.

Gilliatt Gurgle

06-19-2010, 03:33 PM

I see you are an acolyte of that other Eastern deity, Sneaka Luk.

Too funny- You're making my Saturday.
Actually you are causing me to waste my Saturday!

__________________
First we must have some theme music:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnbiRDNaDeo

Jocky,
Now swing that scope toward the constellation Andromeda but don’t “strain” your eyes.
Good, now look North by Northwest and here we see Cassiopeein in the Big Dipper.
Now follow the arc to Arcturus where we find him shakin his Bootes.
But Sirius ly, you must not trifle with Mrs. Jocky or you’ll be spending the night in the Canis Major house.
Or worse still, she’ll accuse you of being a Lyra and force you to sleep in the Vega.
What’s this sticky mess on the eyepiece? Have you been eating Milky Way bars again?
Never mind about that let us turn our eyes to the south and behold the greatest *** tronomical spectacle of all time; Klingons around Uranus.

Gilliatt

prendrelemick

06-19-2010, 04:14 PM

:biggrin5: Cl***ic:biggrin5:

The Atheist

06-19-2010, 05:22 PM

What's with the asterisks?

Have donkeys suddenly become illegal? Didn't Jesus ride an ***?

dafydd manton

06-19-2010, 05:25 PM

yeah, but we don;t want some *%^$* thinking that you can *&%#ing well say ''@?~=+ on the ##*&+ computer. For **#@=+$! sake!!

The Atheist

06-19-2010, 05:26 PM

I assume this is some kind of error....

Why classic and not assume?

Scher is playing with us - it's not 1st April is it?

dafydd manton

06-19-2010, 05:35 PM

Nah, I just didn't want to offend the delicate sensibilites of the average member, so a few things got deleted. You can't be too ******* careful.

prendrelemick

06-20-2010, 01:34 AM

Everyone starts to pretend to swear, and what happens? - I've got a Laura Ashley Google ad !!!

Are they seeking to change their core customer demigraphic profile? What next, pink shell suits among the twin sets? Nylon leopard print curtains? Name change to Shazza Ashley? It will hit Mrs P hard.

The Atheist

06-20-2010, 04:32 AM

Nylon leopard print curtains? Name change to Shazza Ashley? It will hit Mrs P hard.

Aaargh!

You've just described West Auckland.

Even their MP drives around in a leopard-print Toyota.

dafydd manton

06-20-2010, 06:43 AM

Nylon leopard print curtains, for that electric shock first thing in the morning!

Paulclem

06-20-2010, 11:13 AM

Tack, tat and useless plastic rubbish. it's the foundations of the Western and Eastern economy. Where would Christmas be without it I ask?

dafydd manton

06-20-2010, 12:09 PM

Why, it might even become a pagan festival, with little bearing on Christianity!

The Atheist

06-20-2010, 03:45 PM

Tack, tat and useless plastic rubbish. it's the foundations of the Western and Eastern economy. Where would Christmas be without it I ask?

It's funny how people never quite understand that a consumer society must, at some stage end, up in the past tense.

Consumed.

Why, it might even become a pagan festival, with little bearing on Christianity!

I like that!

dafydd manton

06-20-2010, 04:05 PM

Nylon, indeed!! Have they never heard of venetian blinds, or those heavy, maroon brocade ones you can get cheap if you can get to an Indian restaurant that's being refurbished. Admittedly, the house smells a bit strange for a few months, but think of the beer tokens you've saved!!

soundofmusic

06-20-2010, 04:50 PM

Harpo Spencer, is that the bloke who got mugged in Govan by a man and a dog of his croc skin wallet and went on to write The fairy Quean before entering the New Zealand customs service?:rolleyes5:

I heard that Harpo was a fairy queen and traded his croc wallet for the dog:smilewinkgrin:

Recently I have turned my mind to all things astronomical, so much so that I have converted my attic into an observatory, complete with the Meade ETX-LS 6" telescope.....man, that Heather Macpherson at number 42 sure looks hot in her skimpy white underwear embroidered with tiny red roses. She really needs to close her blinds at night, you never know who could be watching.... I digress, what was I on about, oh yes, Mrs Jocky paid a visit to my newly converted attic and after 5 minutes of silent observation remarked, " In the magnificence and wonderment of our Universe Mars looks comparitively tiny and insignificant. " I thought that was so profound I did not have the heart to tell her she was looking through the wrong end of the telescope. :)

I don't know, Jocky, maybe Mrs J was also looing at Heathers red roses instead of the "red planet":cool:

Funny thing about humans: if they live at height, in an apartment block or on a hill, they forget that vision works two ways and that their magnificent view is busy watching them as they look at the view.
Tower crane drivers are aware of this.

:blush2: I guess the semi-truck drivers did see what we were doing on the freeways in our younger and more athletic days:rolleyes:

Have donkeys suddenly become illegal? Didn't Jesus ride an ***?

Speaking of our younger and more athletic days:banana::banana::banana:

Nah, I just didn't want to offend the delicate sensibilites of the average member, so a few things got deleted. You can't be too ******* careful.

...someone get my smelling salts; I think I feel the vapors coming on:angelsad2:

I see you are an acolyte of that other Eastern deity, Sneaka Luk.

I think I saw him the other day in the ladies room:goof:

Too funny- You're making my Saturday.
Actually you are causing me to waste my Saturday!

__________________
First we must have some theme music:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xnbiRDNaDeo

Jocky,
Now swing that scope toward the constellation Andromeda but don’t “strain” your eyes.
Good, now look North by Northwest and here we see Cassiopeein in the Big Dipper.
Now follow the arc to Arcturus where we find him shakin his Bootes.
But Sirius ly, you must not trifle with Mrs. Jocky or you’ll be spending the night in the Canis Major house.
Or worse still, she’ll accuse you of being a Lyra and force you to sleep in the Vega.
What’s this sticky mess on the eyepiece? Have you been eating Milky Way bars again?
Never mind about that let us turn our eyes to the south and behold the greatest *** tronomical spectacle of all time; Klingons around Uranus.

Gilliatt

:lol::thumbs_up

The Atheist

06-20-2010, 08:32 PM

:blush2: I guess the semi-truck drivers did see what we were doing on the freeways in our younger and more athletic days:rolleyes:

Haha! You remind me of a great story.

One of my former lovers - a blonde stunner, funnily enough - was a complete exhibitionist who used to drive an automatic car with her left leg resting on the centre console to see how many truck drivers just about lost control. (right hand drive)

Baaaad girl.

But lots of fun!

She also used to come into my office and make like Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct. My secretary - an older, but fun bird - used to come and tell me that "that sexy-lookin' one had arrived".

:D

dafydd manton

06-21-2010, 12:32 PM

The Atheist

06-21-2010, 03:21 PM

That's the down-side of working at home. All I get is the missus bringing in a coffee now and again, which I appreciate, or else the cat comes in looking for food, passes wind and leaves again, which I do not appreciate.

One advantage to working from home - you know you can chase the secretary around without fear of reprisal!

dafydd manton

06-21-2010, 03:38 PM

Ha! Rumbled! Mind you, these days, I'd probably need an osteopath!

jocky

06-21-2010, 04:58 PM

Haha! If she knows you're living in the same county, I bet she does know who's watching - more care needed there or you'll be trying to do two birds with one stone!

Funny thing about humans: if they live at height, in an apartment block or on a hill, they forget that vision works two ways and that their magnificent view is busy watching them as they look at the view.

Tower crane drivers are aware of this.

Funny enough Mr Macpherson came to my door in a very threatening posture, unfortunately for him the military training kicked in. He is now in wards 2, 3, 7, and 10 of the local hospital. He "may me gone for some time". :)

Jocky,
Now swing that scope toward the constellation Andromeda but don’t “strain” your eyes.
Good, now look North by Northwest and here we see Cassiopeein in the Big Dipper.
Now follow the arc to Arcturus where we find him shakin his Bootes.
But Sirius ly, you must not trifle with Mrs. Jocky or you’ll be spending the night in the Canis Major house.
Or worse still, she’ll accuse you of being a Lyra and force you to sleep in the Vega.
What’s this sticky mess on the eyepiece? Have you been eating Milky Way bars again?
Never mind about that let us turn our eyes to the south and behold the greatest *** tronomical spectacle of all time; Klingons around Uranus.

Gilliatt

A brand new anorak is in the post. As to Klingons around Uranus, you really need to look after your personal hygeine. ;)

I don't know, Jocky, maybe Mrs J was also looing at Heathers red roses instead of the "red planet":

:lol:
One peeping Tom in the household is quite sufficient thank you very much. :)

dafydd manton

06-21-2010, 06:27 PM

Any post that can contain Klingons, Uranus, Peeping Toms and Anoraks in one go deserves the Nobel Prize for Literature - twice!

Paulclem

06-21-2010, 06:35 PM

This is the thread Dafydd - aliens and ale, women and the world cup, beer and banking, google and whatnot. It is the home of the wise and experienced - though not at the same time.

dafydd manton

06-21-2010, 06:40 PM

That lets me out, mate. Experienced, without a doubt, but wise? I don't think so!

Paulclem

06-21-2010, 06:43 PM

Just the ticket! No smart***es are allowed, or else Parker, when he returns will have to have a word. I wonder when he's due back?

soundofmusic

06-21-2010, 07:18 PM

Haha! You remind me of a great story.

One of my former lovers - a blonde stunner, funnily enough - was a complete exhibitionist who used to drive an automatic car with her left leg resting on the centre console to see how many truck drivers just about lost control. (right hand drive)

Baaaad girl.

But lots of fun!

She also used to come into my office and make like Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct. My secretary - an older, but fun bird - used to come and tell me that "that sexy-lookin' one had arrived".

:D
Fortuantely, I was never the one driving; I don't know if it's true, but I hear men have better hand:eye coordination. I was always dating fellows that wanted to try athetics at 80 miles an hour...bumped my head on the steering wheel a few times:crazy:

I'll bet you really prolonged Sharons case...:cool:

the cat comes in looking for food, passes wind and leaves again, which I do not appreciate.

My cat thinks I'm his bi***; I haven't had a hot dinner in a year, he always uses the litter box and insists on immediate service before I sit down:ack2:

One advantage to working from home - you know you can chase the secretary around without fear of reprisal!

I don't guess you get alot of work done that way. I don't guess that works if the secretary isn't your wife:smile5:

Ha! Rumbled! Mind you, these days, I'd probably need an osteopath!

One of my former sweet hearts recently teased me, stating that I would "have a heart attack" if I attempted a night of bliss:blush2::prrr:
What do you think the purpose of that was?:confused:

One peeping Tom in the household is quite sufficient thank you very much. :)

Well, I assumed that Mrs Jocky was keeping her eye on the red planet to insure that it wasn't going to lose gravity and come crashing through your window one night:ihih:

This is the thread Dafydd - aliens and ale, women and the world cup, beer and banking, google and whatnot. It is the home of the wise and experienced - though not at the same time.

Which is why, even if the ladies would allow me to take part in their discussion of shoes and toe nail fungi cures, I would still be haunting this thread:gnorsi:

That lets me out, mate. Experienced, without a doubt, but wise? I don't think so!

I'm like your basic scientist; I keep retesting the experiences to see if I got them right the first time:rolleyes:

Just the ticket! No smart***es are allowed, or else Parker, when he returns will have to have a word. I wonder when he's due back?

Here, Here, My warm beer is cooling off...

The Atheist

06-21-2010, 08:32 PM

Funny enough Mr Macpherson came to my door in a very threatening posture, unfortunately for him the military training kicked in. He is now in wards 2, 3, 7, and 10 of the local hospital.

I gather you're used to drinking late in Glasgow!

Just the ticket! No smart***es are allowed, or else Parker, when he returns will have to have a word. I wonder when he's due back?

After the final whistle of the World Cup.

Fortuantely, I was never the one driving; I don't know if it's true, but I hear men have better hand:eye coordination. I was always dating fellows that wanted to try athetics at 80 miles an hour...bumped my head on the steering wheel a few times:crazy:

Yep, that stuff that seemed so great at the time looks pretty dodgy in hindsight!

soundofmusic

06-22-2010, 01:08 AM

Yep, that stuff that seemed so great at the time looks pretty dodgy in hindsight!

Ah, but all the smile they give me in my dotage are worth it:smile5:

prendrelemick

06-22-2010, 01:21 AM

Fortuantely, I was never the one driving; I don't know if it's true, but I hear men have better hand:eye coordination. I was always dating fellows that wanted to try athetics at 80 miles an hour...bumped my head on the steering wheel a few times:crazy:

While driving down the M1 last year, Mrs P's lipstick rolled across the top of the dash and dropped into my footwell. (Why do they feel the need to touch up their face every 5 mins) I'm sure you've guessed the rest, as she was struggling to retrieve it, a coach full of the recently pubescent drew along side, a friendly group, grinning, cheering and waving as they slowly slid by. It was at least 20 mins before she felt the need to apply any more blusher I can tell you. I sighed wistfully and said it reminded me of the old days. A stoney silence ensued for the rest of the journey.

The Atheist

06-22-2010, 04:59 AM

:lol:

Classic!

The Atheist

06-22-2010, 05:22 PM

Midwinter in Auckland, but we're still getting reasonable weather - today it's around 16 deg and fine with no wind.

Apparently, this is what we can expect with global warming, so it isn't easy to sell carbon reduction around here!

A question for gentlemen to ponder:

Should we stockpile alcohol before the new 20% VAT comes into effect?

Apparently, we're down to only 126 cases of scotch and 483 of champagne.

dafydd manton

06-22-2010, 05:32 PM

soundofmusic

06-22-2010, 05:53 PM

While driving down the M1 last year, Mrs P's lipstick rolled across the top of the dash and dropped into my footwell. (Why do they feel the need to touch up their face every 5 mins) I'm sure you've guessed the rest, as she was struggling to retrieve it, a coach full of the recently pubescent drew along side, a friendly group, grinning, cheering and waving as they slowly slid by. It was at least 20 mins before she felt the need to apply any more blusher I can tell you. I sighed wistfully and said it reminded me of the old days. A stoney silence ensued for the rest of the journey.

Perhaps Mrs. P hasn't reached her dotage where she sheds a tear for those by-gone days. It's a funny thing, though, when I look back, it seems that the air always smelled sweet, the young men never had dirty socks or bad breath....
maybe that's the thing that gets us when we are old: sharpened senses:ack2:

Midwinter in Auckland, but we're still getting reasonable weather - today it's around 16 deg and fine with no wind.

Apparently, this is what we can expect with global warming, so it isn't easy to sell carbon reduction around here!

A question for gentlemen to ponder:

Should we stockpile alcohol before the new 20% VAT comes into effect?

Apparently, we're down to only 126 cases of scotch and 483 of champagne.

It is the beginning of summer here, my a/c is broken in the car and my driving arm is 3 shades darker than the other. You can feel the sun penetrate through the cotton clothes and melts you to your whities...
Tell Parker to double the rations; me and Gilliatt are sneaking past the border.

I've tried stockpiling as much as I can, but I'm starting to feel a bit sick now, and I've had to wander upstairs 17 times in the last half hour. Itsh gettin' ekshtrmly dffictl now, but i'M doin' me besht. Pleasshe advizhe if i'm doin' thish proply. I love you, you're my besht mate.....

Dafydd love, I'm not sure, but I think part of your supply just splashed on the stairs:frown2:

dafydd manton

06-22-2010, 05:58 PM

nah, nah, thatsh the cat....jusht trippt over the shtupid ****zzzzzzzzzzz

Paulclem

06-22-2010, 06:44 PM

The Atheist

06-22-2010, 08:02 PM

I've tried stockpiling as much as I can, but I'm starting to feel a bit sick now, and I've had to wander upstairs 17 times in the last half hour. Itsh gettin' ekshtrmly dffictl now, but i'M doin' me besht. Pleasshe advizhe if i'm doin' thish proply. I love you, you're my besht mate.....

Ummm, stockpiling doesn't mean drinking it all at once!

:lol:

It is the beginning of summer here, my a/c is broken in the car and my driving arm is 3 shades darker than the other.

Yeah, I get that in summer if I drive around a lot. Looks bloody funny!

I was once on a rugby trip to Lancashire when the coach passed a car on the inside lane with the bloke who played George Roper in The Liver birds and George and Mildred. We had a really good coach driver - Barry - who kept us neck and neck with the poor fellow for the next 5 minutes. I bet he'd never seen so many hairy grins pressed up against the bus bus window before.

George & Mildred, that's going back some!

The other program wasn't The Liver Birds, but the one with Gilbert O'Sullivan and the two chicky flatmates - one an amazing blonde that I recall very well!

stlukesguild

06-22-2010, 08:49 PM

Summer here in the US. Closing in on warm and excessively humid. We had our first cook out of the year. A belated Father's Day: steaks and burgers on the grill... just finished off an interesting banana bread beer:banana: and moving on to my personal favorite: Samuel Smith Imperial Stout... a classic Miles disc blaring:

http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4049/4694701758_f410b4bc21.jpg

Miles, Jeanne Moreau, and Sam Smith... what could be finer?;)

stlukesguild

06-22-2010, 10:21 PM

On to the third Sam Smith and the third Miles disc... the immortal:

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1084/4726395032_7baf3d4e54.jpg

The Atheist

06-22-2010, 10:41 PM

On to the third Sam Smith and the third Miles disc... the immortal:

Yep, you can play that all day - fantastic stuff.

stlukesguild

06-22-2010, 10:52 PM

It's the perfect disc to slowly slip into an alcohol haze with. And then I have the Stones waiting in the wings... once I hit the Three Philosophers Belgian ale (10% alcohol... God, you can taste it... the wife calls it jet fuel) and get really f***ed up.

http://farm2.static.flickr.com/1241/4726460196_4c72eb0a52.jpg

stlukesguild

06-22-2010, 10:54 PM

My God!!!!:eek6::eek2:

I almost spilled my Three Philosophers!!!
:blush2::willy_nilly::frown2:

One of my stacks of books (of all things... can you believe it???) fell over and almost knocked the bottle to the floor.

Horror or horrors!!!:cryin:

:cheers2:

Gilliatt Gurgle

06-22-2010, 11:03 PM

stlukesguild

06-22-2010, 11:52 PM

Oh yes! School is out. :party:

I guess that's not indicative of an educator deeply in love with his job... but oh well...:ack2:

This is week two.

Nine more to go!:party:

Pass me another beer.:cheers2:

stlukesguild

06-23-2010, 12:18 AM

OK

Where are all my drinking buddies???:confused::confused:

And Sher... please don't mess with the size on these posts.:biggrinjester::wave:

I'm a visual artist... scale is very important.:cornut:

prendrelemick

06-23-2010, 02:53 AM

prendrelemick

06-23-2010, 03:02 AM

Well things were getting desperate chez nous, untill my daughter arrived with a fathers day gift of 6 Newkie browns and a black pudding. (I've trained her well) The perfect antidote to all those mediterranean salads and grape juice that have been appearing in front of me at mealtimes since the hot weather kicked in.

Scheherazade

06-23-2010, 03:07 AM

And Sher... please don't mess with the size on these posts.:biggrinjester::wave:*rolls her eyes and sighs dramatically*

Why must it always come down to "size"?
I'm a visual artist... scale is very important.:cornut:Yes, sure... It is all for art.

prendrelemick

06-23-2010, 03:31 AM

:lol: Superb

I was once on a rugby trip to Lancashire when the coach passed a car on the inside lane with the bloke who played George Roper in The Liver birds and George and Mildred. We had a really good coach driver - Barry - who kept us neck and neck with the poor fellow for the next 5 minutes. I bet he'd never seen so many hairy grins pressed up against the bus bus window before.

http://www.online-literature.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=932&pictureid=7393

Another Rugby trip story: (as told to me) My mate and his team went to see the grand final at Old Trafford.( Wigan vs Bradford) They used their usual coach and driver, an old bus with no "facilities", instead a bucket with a lid was provided. By the time they reached Old Trafford it was brim-full, due to all the beer passing through.

After the game, as they were leaving the car park a Wigan fan came up and started banging on the door and shouting abuse. The scrum half, showing his quick thinking and leadership qualities, shouted "O'pen t' door Barry!" to the driver and threw the entire contents of the bucket straight in his face, just as he opened his mouth open to hurl more abuse.

Another humiliating defeat for Wigan there I think.

The Atheist

06-23-2010, 05:09 AM

Where are all my drinking buddies???

Hung over!

Your kids get ELEVEN weeks off?

My god, if they tried that here, there'd be blood in the streets. 7 weeks is as much as the kids get here.

My mate Terry can get you anything at a very special rate - cash only.

I used to have a mate like that - he'd rock up to the bank where I worked with a crate of Johnny Walker black label and take $120 for it.

I used to on-sell it at $15 a bottle for a nice profit and a free bottle.

Another Rugby trip story: (as told to me) My mate and his team went to see the grand final at Old Trafford.( Wigan vs Bradford) They used their usual coach and driver, an old bus with no "facilities", instead a bucket with a lid was provided. By the time they reached Old Trafford it was brim-full, due to all the beer passing through.

After the game, as they were leaving the car park a Wigan fan came up and started banging on the door and shouting abuse. The scrum half, showing his quick thinking and leadership qualities, shouted "O'pen t' door Barry!" to the driver and threw the entire contents of the bucket straight in his face, just as he opened his mouth open to hurl more abuse.

Another humiliating defeat for Wigan there I think.

:lol:

Brilliant!

Mind you, being from Wigan, drinking wee-wee would make a nice change from eating ****.

Paulclem

06-23-2010, 06:40 AM

Ummm, stockpiling doesn't mean drinking it all at once!

:lol:

Yeah, I get that in summer if I drive around a lot. Looks bloody funny!

George & Mildred, that's going back some!

The other program wasn't The Liver Birds, but the one with Gilbert O'Sullivan and the two chicky flatmates - one an amazing blonde that I recall very well!

Yes you're right - it was Man About the House which, at the back end of the saucy seventies, didn't deliver on any front. We only had 3 channnels back then.

The Atheist

06-23-2010, 03:22 PM

Yes you're right - it was Man About the House which, at the back end of the saucy seventies, didn't deliver on any front. We only had 3 channnels back then.

That was it!

I agree that the program was crap - it wasn't even funny, as I recall it, but that little blonde in it was sensational.

Crikey, three channels? You were spoilt, we had just the one and during the week, programming ran from 3 pm to 10 pm and that was it!

dafydd manton

06-23-2010, 04:07 PM

Just think, then we had three channels of absolute rubbish, but now we have limitless channels of exactly the same thing. Just as you get to the good bit of a motor race/rugby match/whatever, some prat throws in an advert and you miss the whole lot, but you know how to augment your diet/breast/muscles/insureance policy. Deep Joy!

Paulclem

06-23-2010, 04:12 PM

Yep 3 and BBC 1 and BBC 2 played the National Anthem, before some smug git advised you to turn off and unplug the telly. People must have done a lot more sleeping back then.

I used to read a lot - and the pubs shut at 11.30 thanks be to Gladstone! In the middle 80s before all day drinking came in in 88? - 89? I remember wandering the streets and going on midnight country rambles with the mates for lack of something to do.

Just think, then we had three channels of absolute rubbish, but now we have limitless channels of exactly the same thing. Just as you get to the good bit of a motor race/rugby match/whatever, some prat throws in an advert and you miss the whole lot, but you know how to augment your diet/breast/muscles/insureance policy. Deep Joy!

Yes the times I've surfed the whole 5 or 600 channels for something to watch. I think, with that many channels I expect to find something I really want to watch, rather than putting up with some old rubbish. My expectations are higher, and I am sorely disappointed most times.

dafydd manton

06-23-2010, 04:29 PM

Bring back the test-card!!! Frankly, it was a heck of a sight more interesting than the vast majority of programmes today, where some 16-year old producer thinks we'd like to watch Pride and Prejudice in the nude, where Stock Car Racing and Heroin abuse were the only diversions, until the Mormon Tabernacle Choir came to town, and there was somebody new to stone, using kumquats and plastic effigies of the latest Damian Hurst.

The Atheist

06-23-2010, 04:55 PM

Just don't start me on "reality" tv.

I do, however, find it amusing that "reality" tv is a lot less real than Coro St.

There are only two things I watch on tv - sport and horse racing.

Oh yeah.

When did vomit become entertainment? It can't all be down to Mr Creosote.

Is the next logical step showing someone defecating in the name of entertainment?

dafydd manton

06-23-2010, 05:49 PM

Don't hold your breath! On two counts!

soundofmusic

06-23-2010, 06:05 PM

nah, nah, thatsh the cat....jusht trippt over the shtupid ****zzzzzzzzzzz

Ah, you have a dribbler :ack2: Mine just trips stares at me while I take a bubble bath :blush2:and trips me in the kitchen:toetap05:

:lol: Superb

I was once on a rugby trip to Lancashire when the coach passed a car on the inside lane with the bloke who played George Roper in The Liver birds and George and Mildred. We had a really good coach driver - Barry - who kept us neck and neck with the poor fellow for the next 5 minutes. I bet he'd never seen so many hairy grins pressed up against the bus bus window before.

http://www.online-literature.com/forums/picture.php?albumid=932&pictureid=7393

Did he think you were trying to run him off the road:auto: That looks like a great show; I'm going to look it up on youtube:banana:

[SIZE="5"][COLOR="DarkRed"]OK
Where are all my drinking buddies??? :wave::cheers2:

[QUOTE=Scheherazade;913770]*rolls her eyes and sighs dramatically*

Why must it always come down to "size"?Yes, sure... It is all for art.

:smilielol5::brow:

Another Rugby trip story: (as told to me) My mate and his team went to see the grand final at Old Trafford.( Wigan vs Bradford) They used their usual coach and driver, an old bus with no "facilities", instead a bucket with a lid was provided. By the time they reached Old Trafford it was brim-full, due to all the beer passing through.

After the game, as they were leaving the car park a Wigan fan came up and started banging on the door and shouting abuse. The scrum half, showing his quick thinking and leadership qualities, shouted "O'pen t' door Barry!" to the driver and threw the entire contents of the bucket straight in his face, just as he opened his mouth open to hurl more abuse.

Another humiliating defeat for Wigan there I think.

What a surprise that must have been:puke:

Yes you're right - it was Man About the House which, at the back end of the saucy seventies, didn't deliver on any front. We only had 3 channnels back then.

We had a similar version in America, 3's Company; I'm back to 4 channels with my digital converter; most of my favorite shows are on 2 of them.

That was it!

I agree that the program was crap - it wasn't even funny, as I recall it, but that little blonde in it was sensational.

I don't think she quite compares to Suzanne Somers of 3's company; that blonde bimbo attitude, pig tails, and cleavage really worked for her:arf:

Stlukes - School must be out. You are having too much fun!

Gilliatt

I think I'm changing careers:banana::banana:

The Atheist

06-23-2010, 06:48 PM

I don't think she quite compares to Suzanne Somers of 3's company; that blonde bimbo attitude, pig tails, and cleavage really worked for her:arf:

Not for me - I'd have stomped over Suzanne in hob-nailed boots to get at Sally Thomsett. I think Suzanne Somers always had just a smidgen too much American plastic about her.

Paulclem

06-23-2010, 07:06 PM

Did he think you were trying to run him off the road:auto: That looks like a great show; I'm going to look it up on youtube:banana:

It was really funny. My mate - Squinny - so called at school because he had a squint and came late and so was bullied a bit, (though all that changed when he grew to 6:3 and became rather huge - we all called him Andy then) - noticed George Roper sitting in the passenger seat of a car we were passing. He shouted out, "That's George Roper!" whereupon most of the bus shouted "**** ***!".

Then another lad saw him too and there was a stampede to one side of the bus. (I'm surprised we didn't veer onto the hard shoulder with all that meat shifting around). There ensued a jeering, pointing and shouting out of the window - ( the coach trips could be a bit tedious) - topped off with a mass roll down of trousers and hairy grins pressed up against the windows.

I'm sure Barry - (our coach driver was called Barry too Mick - either it's the coach driver's official name, or it was the same Barry) - had to go over the windows with a cloth when he got back to his coaching house or where-ever he lived.

I didn't like the show - even when I'd seen George Roper on the M62 Motorway.

Taugenichts

06-24-2010, 01:02 AM

Is the next logical step showing someone defecating in the name of entertainment?

Very likely. In fact, I've heard Bill Cosby is planning on making a comeback - new sitcom staged entirely in a public washroom called "Trapp's last Krapp".

The Atheist

06-24-2010, 03:44 AM

Well, that'd go with how I feel about Cosby. I've just never found him at all funny, and I do like some American comedians, top of which was the godfather of Teh US Funneh, the late and much-lamented George Carlin.

And most importantly welcome along to The Blokes' Club!

Just leave us a note of what tipple tickles your fancy and I'm sure Parker laid in a stock before he went on holiday. The first one's on the house!

dafydd manton

06-24-2010, 05:34 AM

Can I have mine retrospectively? If so, I'll have a pint of cheap French cooking brandy, please.

The Atheist

06-24-2010, 04:14 PM

Can I have mine retrospectively? If so, I'll have a pint of cheap French cooking brandy, please.

That is a difficult one - and my apologies for not offering - because Parker only buys premium brands.

We have loads of VSOP; even the chef uses it. No cheap stuff, I'm afraid.

We've had to train jocky to drink alcohol from bottles with labels on, so I reckon you'll manage!

:D

dafydd manton

06-24-2010, 04:28 PM

Given what the "P" stands for within the circles in which I move, (and recycling is good for the planet), there should be no problem.

andrewoberg

06-24-2010, 10:58 PM

Alright, I'm posting because I want my free drink. It'd better be dark and it'd better not be Continental!

The Atheist

06-24-2010, 11:31 PM

Alright, I'm posting because I want my free drink. It'd better be dark and it'd better not be Continental!

How dark?

Black rum? Guinness?

Taugenichts

06-25-2010, 04:35 AM

http://images.mylot.com/userImages/images/postphotos/2205478.jpg

Any absinthe in stock?

prendrelemick

06-25-2010, 05:41 AM

Not for me - I'd have stomped over Suzanne in hob-nailed boots to get at Sally Thomsett. I think Suzanne Somers always had just a smidgen too much American plastic about her.

When "little" Sally Thomsett was filming The Railway Children in these parts she was a 20 year old playing a 12 year old. (Heavy strapping was involved)Her night-time antics in the pubs and clubs of Leeds have become the stuff of legend. Jenny Agguter on the other hand was as sweet and demure as her screen persona, I'm sorry to report.

Scheherazade

06-25-2010, 07:58 AM

It'd better be dark and it'd better not be Continental!How about some blood?

I am sure we have got many different types from all over the world available on the Forum.

Paulclem

06-25-2010, 12:13 PM

How about some blood?

I am sure we have got many different types from all over the world available on the Forum.

There's certainly plenty spilt around the forums...

The Atheist

06-25-2010, 03:59 PM

Any absinthe in stock?

Of course!

I'll have some sent up. We don't get many of those.

When "little" Sally Thomsett was filming The Railway Children in these parts she was a 20 year old playing a 12 year old. (Heavy strapping was involved)Her night-time antics in the pubs and clubs of Leeds have become the stuff of legend. Jenny Agguter on the other hand was as sweet and demure as her screen persona, I'm sorry to report.

Crikey, there's another legendary beauty from the past - Jenny Agutter. She certainly didn't mind showing her goods, though.

Sounds as though Sally and I would have got on extremely well in those days!

How about some blood?

Mine's green.

___________________________________________

But you've reminded me that I'm overdue to give some of it away. Gentlemen are expected to donate blood at least three times a year.

Trying to improve the overall quality!

:D

soundofmusic

06-25-2010, 04:31 PM

Bring back the test-card!!! Frankly, it was a heck of a sight more interesting than the vast majority of programmes today, where some 16-year old producer thinks we'd like to watch Pride and Prejudice in the nude

What, What, is someone redoing pride and prejudice nude...I think I'd watch that...:wink5:

Just don't start me on "reality" tv.

I do, however, find it amusing that "reality" tv is a lot less real than Coro St.

I love those house makeover shows where the crippled kids, or the dying father gets a million dollar home, a trip to disney and a new car...If you look closely, some of the rooms and kids are the same.

Not for me - I'd have stomped over Suzanne in hob-nailed boots to get at Sally Thomsett. I think Suzanne Somers always had just a smidgen too much American plastic about her.

Are you talking about the cleavage, the smile or the attitude:cornut:

It was really funny. My mate - Squinny - so called at school because he had a squint and came late and so was bullied a bit, (though all that changed when he grew to 6:3 and became rather huge - we all called him Andy then) - noticed George Roper sitting in the passenger seat of a car we were passing. He shouted out, "That's George Roper!" whereupon most of the bus shouted "**** ***!".

Then another lad saw him too and there was a stampede to one side of the bus. (I'm surprised we didn't veer onto the hard shoulder with all that meat shifting around). There ensued a jeering, pointing and shouting out of the window - ( the coach trips could be a bit tedious) - topped off with a mass roll down of trousers and hairy grins pressed up against the windows.

I'm sure Barry - (our coach driver was called Barry too Mick - either it's the coach driver's official name, or it was the same Barry) - had to go over the windows with a cloth when he got back to his coaching house or where-ever he lived.

I didn't like the show - even when I'd seen George Roper on the M62 Motorway.

I can't imagine what that must have been like for poor George, I've gotten mooned once or twice by a pubescent teen; but I can't imagine what a bunch of hairy bums would look like gawking at me through a window:lol:

Very likely. In fact, I've heard Bill Cosby is planning on making a comeback - new sitcom staged entirely in a public washroom called "Trapp's last Krapp".

I liked Bill in the Jello pudding and fat albert days; unfortunately, he tried to become profound:prrr:

When "little" Sally Thomsett was filming The Railway Children in these parts she was a 20 year old playing a 12 year old. (Heavy strapping was involved)Her night-time antics in the pubs and clubs of Leeds have become the stuff of legend. Jenny Agguter on the other hand was as sweet and demure as her screen persona, I'm sorry to report.

Now you've gone and done it; I think Atheist just locked himself in the cellar with all of our booze:incazzato:

The Atheist

06-25-2010, 05:54 PM

What, What, is someone redoing pride and prejudice nude...I think I'd watch that...:wink5:

Me too!

We could cast it for the producers. I'll have the couch!

Are you talking about the cleavage, the smile or the attitude:cornut:

All of it.

Scheherazade

06-25-2010, 06:00 PM

There's certainly plenty spilt around the forums...Yeah, from now on I will bottle it rather than mopping up.
Mine's green.Minty.

jocky

06-25-2010, 06:27 PM

That is a difficult one - and my apologies for not offering - because Parker only buys premium brands.

We have loads of VSOP; even the chef uses it. No cheap stuff, I'm afraid.

We've had to train jocky to drink alcohol from bottles with labels on, so I reckon you'll manage!

:D

Aye Atheist, and I well never listen to your advice again. I recently aquired a crate of Marques de Arienzo Rioja Gran Reserva 1998 at a ridiculously cheap price. I have just been released from hospital after a severe case of vinegar poisoning. If only I could afford Parker, he would never have allowed me to drink it. :(

The Atheist

06-25-2010, 09:35 PM

:lol:

We can subsidise the good stuff for our northern brothers in the name of global warming.

There's a bottle of absinthe going cheap - I believe Taugenichts passed out after the first bottle!

Gilliatt Gurgle

06-25-2010, 10:47 PM

...Marques de Arienzo Rioja Gran Reserva 1998 at a ridiculously cheap price. I have just been released from hospital after a severe case of vinegar poisoning.

:lol:

...There's a bottle of absinthe going cheap - I believe Taugenichts passed out after the first bottle!

You may sTout your Marquis Arizona Rojas Grand Reservation along with that Absint the mind stuff, but nothing beets my neighbors hooch he brews down by the creek.
That stuff u’ll have you talkin to trees! Why, just now I was chatting with an Ulmus americanus about the the Americans chances against Gonna :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gh2UzWgSw3Q&feature=related

Gilliatt

Paulclem

06-26-2010, 04:56 AM

You may sTout your Marquis Arizona Rojas Grand Reservation along with that Absint the mind stuff, but nothing beets my neighbors hooch he brews down by the creek.
That stuff u’ll have you talkin to trees! Why, just now I was chatting with an Ulmus americanus about the the Americans chances against Gonna :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gh2UzWgSw3Q&feature=related

Gilliatt
:biggrinjester:

I didn't realise he had a ... a voice. It could really have put a spin on the Dirty Harry series if they could have thrown in a few numbers - especially for the Asian Bollywood audience.

Yeah, from now on I will bottle it rather than mopping up.Minty.

:lol:

The Atheist - minty...That could be the start of a new thread - what flavour do you think your favourite litnetters are?

Scheherazade

06-26-2010, 09:26 AM

what flavour do you think your favourite litnetters are?Oh, I don't know.

Not all of us are blessed with a flavour.

prendrelemick

06-26-2010, 11:49 AM

Paul, I'll always think of you as Mexican Gorgonzola.

The Atheist

06-26-2010, 04:52 PM

Salty.

(Sorry, I couldn't help it.)

soundofmusic

06-27-2010, 12:42 AM

Very likely. In fact, I've heard Bill Cosby is planning on making a comeback - new sitcom staged entirely in a public washroom called "Trapp's last Krapp".

:prrr: Darn, I thought that cute piece, George Michael was going to be in that one:wink5:
Oh, by the way, Welcome!:banana::banana:

Alright, I'm posting because I want my free drink. It'd better be dark and it'd better not be Continental!

Teaching in Japan...:cold: I saw a 48 hours mystery about that...:eek6: How'd you avoid the white slavers:yikes:
Hurry, someone bring this brave man some good whiskey:gnorsi:

http://images.mylot.com/userImages/images/postphotos/2205478.jpg

Any absinthe in stock?

What is it about wormwood flavor that appeals to people:confused:

Me too!

We could cast it for the producers. I'll have the couch!

All of it.

Are you only casting ingenues'; or shall we send some of Hefners stock:wink5:

Yeah, from now on I will bottle it rather than mopping up.Minty.

A bottle of Red Goldshlager coming up!

You may sTout your Marquis Arizona Rojas Grand Reservation along with that Absint the mind stuff, but nothing beets my neighbors hooch he brews down by the creek.
That stuff u’ll have you talkin to trees! Why, just now I was chatting with an Ulmus americanus about the the Americans chances against Gonna :

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Gh2UzWgSw3Q&feature=related

Gilliatt

I don't know Gilliatt, do you relly think that's Clint singing?

Oh, I don't know.

Not all of us are blessed with a flavour.

What flavor are you Scher?:smile5:

The Atheist

06-27-2010, 12:50 AM

Are you only casting ingenues'; or shall we send some of Hefners stock:wink5:

Oh god no, no plastic boobs!

Proper actors all round. Your bloke could play Heathcliff, couldn't he?

Paulclem

06-27-2010, 04:01 AM

Paul, I'll always think of you as Mexican Gorgonzola.

:lol:

It's a throwback to the delusions of childhood where even cartoons are real.

Do you remember the Gorgonzola cheese triangle in the Dairylea mixed?

andrewoberg

06-27-2010, 06:03 AM

Teaching in Japan...:cold: I saw a 48 hours mystery about that...:eek6: How'd you avoid the white slavers:yikes:
Hurry, someone bring this brave man some good whiskey:gnorsi:

I've changed my order! Whiskey sounds perfect.:wave:

soundofmusic

06-27-2010, 06:27 PM

I've changed my order! Whiskey sounds perfect.:wave:

Okay Parker...is parker back...two whiskey's on the rocks...what..no rocks:rage: Why can't I ever get ice cubes when I leave the states:bawling:

Oh god no, no plastic boobs!

Proper actors all round. Your bloke could play Heathcliff, couldn't he?

I hear they make them more natural looking now. I'm not sure how he will look in the nude...I wonder if we should do a little photo shopping with Timothy Dalton or Larry Olivier...

The Atheist

06-27-2010, 07:51 PM

Okay Parker...is parker back...two whiskey's on the rocks...what..no rocks:rage: Why can't I ever get ice cubes when I leave the states:bawling:

I thought Ice Cube was some rapper bloke....

Two whiskeys, we can do. There must be some ice around somewhere; there was a frost this morining.

I hear they make them more natural looking now. I'm not sure how he will look in the nude...I wonder if we should do a little photo shopping with Timothy Dalton or Larry Olivier...

Hmm, I'll leave you to photoshopping the men!

Some of them need it.

:D

The Atheist

06-28-2010, 12:15 AM

Thinking, and the lack thereof.

How stupid would you need to be?

My 8yo boy comes home today, and I notice a necklace he wasn't wearing this morning. It took me about 1/4 of a second to see that it was made of [roughly] 26-gauge steel wire. (Very thin, but very strong, just as prescribed as a weapon in the better Commando novels.)

I told him to remove it immediately, and asked where it had come from.

They made them in art class at school.

Now, I'm assuming the teacher doesn't know the word 'garrote', because that's what this thing is.

In the meantime, I've advised the school that these nust all be brought back to school and destroyed before some kid decapitates itself with it - the number of ways this could be lethal are just endless. Even a simple game of tag, with a friend grabbing the back of the shirt and getting the necklace by mistake could cause fatal injury.

I believe science tomorrow, they're making ANFO.

Although that would be far preferable, as ANFO at least requires a detonator - not something the average 8yo has access to.

On the other hand, 8yos climb, run and jump; every one of which is potentially a disaster waiting to happen.

Honestly, how amazingly stupid would you need to be to think this was an appropriate thing at that [or any] age?

prendrelemick

06-28-2010, 10:35 AM

I was going to suggest actors for the nude p&p, but to be honest Jeniffer Ehle and the cast of 1995 would be ideal. (Subject to Athiest,s casting procedures of course)

I don't know where it comes from but I have a memory of reading how commandoes were trained in the use of the gavotte to silently eliminate an enemy.

The Atheist

06-28-2010, 02:54 PM

I was going to suggest actors for the nude p&p, but to be honest Jeniffer Ehle and the cast of 1995 would be ideal. (Subject to Athiest,s casting procedures of course)

You can choose it, mate; I know nothing about the book, and see that I even confused it with Wuthering Heights!

:lol:

She's ok!

I see one pic where I think Soundo could be tempted to do a swap - the bloke looks a bit like her avatar toy-boy.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-461157/Utopian-win-Jennifer-Ehle-Tom-Stoppard-Tony-Awards.html

Ah, I see he's Ethan Hawke, whoever he is.

I don't know where it comes from but I have a memory of reading how commandoes were trained in the use of the gavotte to silently eliminate an enemy.

Surely the music would be a giveaway (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gavotte)?

Luca Brasi gets killed with one in The Godfather as well.

dafydd manton

06-28-2010, 03:27 PM

Oh I say, how so unlike the home life of our own dear Queen.

soundofmusic

06-28-2010, 07:10 PM

I thought Ice Cube was some rapper bloke....

Two whiskeys, we can do. There must be some ice around somewhere; there was a frost this morining.

Hmm, I'll leave you to photoshopping the men!

Some of them need it.

:D
Just as long as none of the ice outside is yellow:lol: I think I might do a bit of photoshopping on myself; switch out a few things with Angelina or some of the up and comings...

Thinking, and the lack thereof.

How stupid would you need to be?

My 8yo boy comes home today, and I notice a necklace he wasn't wearing this morning. It took me about 1/4 of a second to see that it was made of [roughly] 26-gauge steel wire. (Very thin, but very strong, just as prescribed as a weapon in the better Commando novels.)

I told him to remove it immediately, and asked where it had come from.

They made them in art class at school.

Now, I'm assuming the teacher doesn't know the word 'garrote', because that's what this thing is.

In the meantime, I've advised the school that these nust all be brought back to school and destroyed before some kid decapitates itself with it - the number of ways this could be lethal are just endless. Even a simple game of tag, with a friend grabbing the back of the shirt and getting the necklace by mistake could cause fatal injury.

My God, are you sure your boy didn't get on the wrong bus and wind up at prison work release:ack2:

I was going to suggest actors for the nude p&p, but to be honest Jeniffer Ehle and the cast of 1995 would be ideal. (Subject to Athiest,s casting procedures of course)

Maybe Jennifer; but I've seen Colin Firth half nude...not pretty.

You can choose it, mate; I know nothing about the book, and see that I even confused it with Wuthering Heights!

:lol:

She's ok!

I see one pic where I think Soundo could be tempted to do a swap - the bloke looks a bit like her avatar toy-boy.

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/tvshowbiz/article-461157/Utopian-win-Jennifer-Ehle-Tom-Stoppard-Tony-Awards.html

Ah, I see he's Ethan Hawke, whoever he is.

Luca Brasi gets killed with one in The Godfather as well.

Yeah, Ethan has his moments; he's not aging well. I think actors were prettier when they did the original Pride and Prejudice; though, Jude (my toy boy) was awfully cute in midnight in the garden of good and evil...

I loved Luca, isn't he the one, "I am honored to be here on this the day of your daughters wedding....classic

Oh I say, how so unlike the home life of our own dear Queen.

Well, she doesn't take responsibility for the protectorates...
I don't know, in America we're still putting strings through a button...

jocky

06-30-2010, 03:47 PM

The Atheist

06-30-2010, 04:49 PM

My God, are you sure your boy didn't get on the wrong bus and wind up at prison work release:ack2:

I think it's all part of the anti-terrorist training. They're disarming IEDs next week.

I loved Luca, isn't he the one, "I am honored to be here on this the day of your daughters wedding....classic

Yep, that one!

:D

Atheist, father son relationships are always ambiguous and never straight forward.

Almost as bad as mother-daughter relationships.

Our girl is a classic. I stayed at home with her when she was a baby & toddler and Mrs Atheist worked. As a result, she thinks she's the Queen, which causes just a teeny bit of conflict with mum.

It does have its advantages, though (for me). When mum goes out, the girl has to run around doing everything to show how wonderful and talented she is. This gives me a chance to get an hour's peace every now and then!

jocky

06-30-2010, 07:36 PM

I think it's all part of the anti-terrorist training. They're disarming IEDs next week.

Yep, that one!

:D

Almost as bad as mother-daughter relationships.

Our girl is a classic. I stayed at home with her when she was a baby & toddler and Mrs Atheist worked. As a result, she thinks she's the Queen, which causes just a teeny bit of conflict with mum.

It does have its advantages, though (for me). When mum goes out, the girl has to run around doing everything to show how wonderful and talented she is. This gives me a chance to get an hour's peace every now and then!

Yep, I know exactly where you are coming from, yet you have to be careful. Sons will want to live up to you and never let you down. Daughters will love you better but always tell their Ma everything. It is in their nature. :)

The Atheist

06-30-2010, 08:20 PM

Yep, I know exactly where you are coming from, yet you have to be careful. Sons will want to live up to you and never let you down. Daughters will love you better but always tell their Ma everything. It is in their nature. :)

:lol:

That's exactly what she does!

andrewoberg

07-01-2010, 04:28 AM

:lol:

That's exactly what she does!

At least when she's talking to her mum she's leaving you alone!:smilewinkgrin:

dafydd manton

07-01-2010, 05:38 AM

Ah, leaving you alone, but probably tearing you to shreds! I have two daughters. Old German proverb - a house full of daughters is like a cellar full of sour beer. Cynical, or what!

The Atheist

07-01-2010, 02:42 PM

At least when she's talking to her mum she's leaving you alone!:smilewinkgrin:

Not often enough for my liking!

Ah, leaving you alone, but probably tearing you to shreds! I have two daughters. Old German proverb - a house full of daughters is like a cellar full of sour beer. Cynical, or what!

My mum - 4 boys and 2 girls - always maintained boys were a piece of cake compared to girls, and I'm beginning to think she's right. Even at young ages, boys seem to that much more predictable than girls.

Just nobody mention PMS. I can't wait for that!

______________________________________________

Meanwhile, in the hopes of not jinxing the Scottish chappie, I will mention Wimbledon. Anyone watching?

In pure entertainment terms, it's a lot better than the soccer, which I find a bit dull.

The amazing game Isner took 70 games in the 5th set to win.
Kournikova and Hingis playing doubles.
Williamses out.
Federer out....

And since we're in a bloke's thread, here are the women of Wimbledon:

http://www.stuff.co.nz/sport/photos/3875655/Ladies-of-Wimbledon-gallery

No pic of Andy Murray's chick, dammit.

prendrelemick

07-01-2010, 03:32 PM

Not bad, but for her legs alone the true Wimbers champion is..

http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k78/prendrelemick/imagesCAZ1G9YA.jpg

hang on a minute..

http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k78/prendrelemick/steffi_graf5.jpg

Thats better. Now tell me if there are a better pair of legs out there.

dafydd manton

07-01-2010, 04:16 PM

Well, they're certainly shaplier than Andy Murray's!

The Atheist

07-01-2010, 06:45 PM

Thats better. Now tell me if there are a better pair of legs out there.

Never, not in the history of women! Always liked her.

She's one of two reasons I hate Andre Agassi.

The other is Brooke Shields.

soundofmusic

07-01-2010, 10:04 PM

Atheist, father son relationships are always ambiguous and never straight forward. My son Jocky Junior the XV of that Ilk recently returned from a sojourn in the Highlands. Face flushed with triumph he told me he had bagged his first Munro, no not Iris Munro, you dirty lot, but the mighty Ben Macdui. I gently reminded him of the time I climbed the North face of the Eiger, without a rope and wearing only canvas shoes , sporran and bowler hat. The front door slammed really loudly and I could swear he called me a curmudgeon. :)

A chip off the old block, not only a mans man; but he knows multi-syllabled words:lol:

I think it's all part of the anti-terrorist training. They're disarming IEDs next week.

Almost as bad as mother-daughter relationships.

Our girl is a classic. I stayed at home with her when she was a baby & toddler and Mrs Atheist worked. As a result, she thinks she's the Queen, which causes just a teeny bit of conflict with mum.

It does have its advantages, though (for me). When mum goes out, the girl has to run around doing everything to show how wonderful and talented she is. This gives me a chance to get an hour's peace every now and then!

I think the shop teacher has been watching too many "Mr Ripley" movies...
The advantage with mother-daughter relationships, is that one offspring cures any misunderstanding:smile5:

Yep, I know exactly where you are coming from, yet you have to be careful. Sons will want to live up to you and never let you down. Daughters will love you better but always tell their Ma everything. It is in their nature. :)

We spend half of our teenage years telling mom why she should leave our fathers; and half of our adult life looking for a man just like him:confused:

Ah, leaving you alone, but probably tearing you to shreds! I have two daughters. Old German proverb - a house full of daughters is like a cellar full of sour beer. Cynical, or what!

:ack2:

Not bad, but for her legs alone the true Wimbers champion is..

http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k78/prendrelemick/imagesCAZ1G9YA.jpg

hang on a minute..

http://i85.photobucket.com/albums/k78/prendrelemick/steffi_graf5.jpg

Thats better. Now tell me if there are a better pair of legs out there.

I don't know, I still think our air-brushed American girls without the sneaker tan line and the ability to walk in 5 inch heels has something over her:shocked:

Never, not in the history of women! Always liked her.

She's one of two reasons I hate Andre Agassi.

The other is Brooke Shields.

She looks like she's alittle much for little Agassi:smilewinkgrin:

andrewoberg

07-01-2010, 10:43 PM

The Atheist

07-01-2010, 10:54 PM

That face!

She has a face?

soundofmusic

07-02-2010, 11:37 AM

That face! Disturbingly manly!!

I see great minds think alike, Andy:iagree:...I was thinking it was Agassi in drag:cool:

She has a face? Just between that luxuriant dark rooted hair and those perfectly molded, and soon to fall out breasts:smilewinkgrin:

prendrelemick

07-02-2010, 03:50 PM

Just between that luxuriant dark rooted hair and those perfectly molded, and soon to fall out breasts:smilewinkgrin:

:crazy::drool5::drool5:

Quick Parker, run me a cold bath.

Gilliatt Gurgle

07-02-2010, 04:40 PM

Not bad, but for her legs alone the true Wimbers champion is..

Thats better. Now tell me if there are a better pair of legs out there.

I do agree.
She does have a nice pair.

This one has some pretty nice legs too:

http://img.listal.com/image/118655/600full-raquel-welch.jpg

and

face(s):

http://www.celebritiesfans.com/Pic/raquelwelch.jpg

Gilliatt

The Atheist

07-02-2010, 05:49 PM

:crazy::drool5::drool5:

Quick Parker, run me a cold bath.

And me.

But not together!

Gilliatt

Raquel never quite made the grade for me.

Maybe if she bleached her hair!

:D

(Mind you, it's probably white now anyway!)

Scheherazade

07-02-2010, 05:53 PM

I do agree.
She does have a nice pair.

This one has some pretty nice legs too:...
and
face(s):...Seriously? The legs and the face are the first things you notice in those photos???

soundofmusic

07-03-2010, 01:21 AM

:crazy::drool5::drool5:

Quick Parker, run me a cold bath.

Not that tub, Parker, that's where I'm keeping my ice for the drinks....:ack2: too late:frown2:

I do agree.
She does have a nice pair.

This one has some pretty nice legs too:

Gilliatt

I don't think I'd get anywhere near those thighs; they'd crush the manhood right out of you:smilewinkgrin:

And me.

But not together!

Now that's a picture I need to wash out of my mind:yikes:; quick parker a triple...no forget the ice....

Seriously? The legs and the face are the first things you notice in those photos???

It's all about survival; they want to see where the boots are stepping and how sharp the teeth are:lol:

andrewoberg

07-03-2010, 03:56 AM

Seriously? The legs and the face are the first things you notice in those photos???

Which begs the ultimate question, gentlemen: Tits or a*s?

soundofmusic

07-03-2010, 12:25 PM

Raquel never quite made the grade for me.

Maybe if she bleached her hair!

(Mind you, it's probably white now anyway!)

I'm with you, Raquel didn't have an ounce of feminine softness; I don't even think going blonde would help those killer eyes and dude jaw line...
Last time I saw her (on one of those shopping shows) she was doing wigs and had a pronounced moustache...

Hey, remember Liza Minelli, I saw her own a shopping show a few days ago, she looked like they had taken her out of the cryogenic chamber to sell her jewelry...

{edit}

The Atheist

07-03-2010, 02:17 PM

I don't think I'd get anywhere near those thighs; they'd crush the manhood right out of you:smilewinkgrin:

Consider me lining up to be crushed - I've always had the hots for Steffi.

I'm with you, Raquel didn't have an ounce of feminine softness; I don't even think going blonde would help those killer eyes and dude jaw line...
Last time I saw her (on one of those shopping shows) she was doing wigs and had a pronounced moustache...

Thanks for that!

There's a picture that will haunt me like an earworm. Does that make it an eyeworm?

Hey, remember Liza Minelli, I saw her own a shopping show a few days ago, she looked like they had taken her out of the cryogenic chamber to sell her jewelry...

At least she can sing!

:D

{edit}

Scheherazade

07-03-2010, 02:28 PM

R e m i n d e r

Please keep in mind that this is an all ages Forum visited by people from different social, cultural and religious backgrounds.

jocky

07-03-2010, 06:37 PM

R e m i n d e r

Please keep in mind that this is an all ages Forum visited by people from different social, cultural and religious backgrounds.

Aye, and even worse, moderators that can reconfigurate limericks. ;)

Which begs the ultimate question, gentlemen: Tits or a*s?

:)

" That is the question " ...... " Whether it be nobler in the mind "..... I personally prefer, or do I ? In times of indecision and moral uncertainty one should always defer to Soundo. Anyway why should it be an and or or? It is our manly duty on the Blokes Thread to give a definite opinion, here is mine. BOTH. :)

Scheherazade

07-03-2010, 07:16 PM

Aye, and even worse, moderators that can reconfigurate limericks. ;)Like this one?

Once there was an old man called Jocky,
Who did not know he was so lucky.
“With all the possibilities that run ahead,”
The Moderator smiled to him as she said:
“Take heed and don’t be so vainly plucky.”

:p

jocky

07-03-2010, 07:41 PM

Like this one?

Once there was an old man called Jocky,
Who did not know he was so lucky.
“With all the possibilities that run ahead,”
The Moderator smiled to him as she said:
“Take heed and don’t be so vainly plucky.”

:p

Warning noted, however it has to be pointed out the third line does not scan. Mind you it can always be changed, anything's possible on this thread. As to the " old man " slur, remember your own words. Goodnight from the " aged person ". ;)

soundofmusic

07-03-2010, 09:50 PM

{edit}

Consider me lining up to be crushed - I've always had the hots for Steffi.

Thanks for that!

There's a picture that will haunt me like an earworm. Does that make it an eyeworm?

At least she can sing!

No, Steffi is not a bone crusher like Raquel...what does she do anyway; besides break the heels off her shoes...

:ack2: I just am afraid of worms in any capacity; I could never watch star trek after that one movie where the fellow gets a worm in his ear...

Well, she did sing...It looks like her mouth is frozen now; maybe it was botox. Iliked her moms voice better; but I think Liza may have been a nicer person.
{edit}

" That is the question " ...... " Whether it be nobler in the mind "..... I personally prefer, or do I ? In times of indecision and moral uncertainty one should always defer to Soundo. Anyway why should it be an and or or? It is our manly duty on the Blokes Thread to give a definite opinion, here is mine. BOTH. :)

Thank you, Jocky, for that vote of confidence.
I think you're in your prime, by the way, and so does Mrs. Jocky:smilewinkgrin:

prendrelemick

07-04-2010, 03:34 AM

I don't think I'd get anywhere near those thighs; they'd crush the manhood right out of you:smilewinkgrin:

Talking about strong thighs, Congratulations to the lovely Serena on her 4th Wimbledon title. Not everyone's choice of pin-up from the womens game, but no one can hit balls harder.

soundofmusic

07-04-2010, 04:06 PM

Which begs the ultimate question, gentlemen:

So what kind of girls do you choose, Andy, amongst all those Japanese flowers?

Talking about strong thighs, Congratulations to the lovely Serena on her 4th Wimbledon title. Not everyone's choice of pin-up from the womens game, but no one can hit balls harder.

Oh my yes, I would not want to be a fly on Serenas walls...slam...

Didn't one of those twins do modeling several years ago?

The Atheist

07-04-2010, 04:43 PM

Talking about strong thighs, Congratulations to the lovely Serena on her 4th Wimbledon title. Not everyone's choice of pin-up from the womens game, but no one can hit balls harder.

Yes, women's tennis has a habit of throwing out the ugly and the beautiful as champions. On the sweet side, Steffi Graf, Chris Evert, all those Russian sheilas with unpronouncable names...

And on the other, the Williams sisters, BJK, Yvonne Goolagong... and that Froggie bloke/cross-dresser, Mauresmo.

Nasty.

Didn't one of those twins do modeling several years ago?

Despite my being unable to tell them apart after the 200 majors they've won, they're only Irish Twins (http://www.wisegeek.com/what-are-irish-twins.htm).

What did she model?

AK47s? Unarmed combat lessons?

andrewoberg

07-05-2010, 12:51 AM

@The Atheist--lol!

@Sound of Music--you've probably noticed that when it comes to Japanese women the question I put to everyone earlier is a largely moot one!

prendrelemick

07-05-2010, 03:44 AM

Is it true that in Japan as well as padded bras, there are also padded knickers, to give a little more shape to the Gluteus Maximus.

The Atheist

07-05-2010, 02:48 PM

I was going to segue that into men, but it might be too close to the line...

(or well over!)

:D

dafydd manton

07-05-2010, 02:59 PM

Some of us don't need our Gluteus Maximus adding to - although, being male, that might be a bit....well....I mean... When you get to the bottom of the hole, stop digging!

soundofmusic

07-05-2010, 03:52 PM

Yes, women's tennis has a habit of throwing out the ugly and the beautiful as champions. On the sweet side, Steffi Graf, Chris Evert, all those Russian sheilas with unpronouncable names...

And on the other, the Williams sisters, BJK, Yvonne Goolagong... and that Froggie bloke/cross-dresser, Mauresmo.

Despite my being unable to tell them apart after the 200 majors they've won, they're only Irish Twins (http://www.wisegeek.com/what-are-irish-twins.htm).

What did she model?

AK47s? Unarmed combat lessons?

Well, I don't think Steffi looks happy with Agassi, he just keeps her busy with babies and fundraising...she'll figure it out one day...decide she wants a man at least as tall as she is...
Do you have an extra room for her, Atheist?

Is Mauresmo really a He/She...I notice they don't have her doing any underwear modeling.

You're right about the Williams sisters...the papers always make them out as twins. I think they tried to put their own line of clothing out, supposedly directed to, what they said, was the afro-american figure and larger women...I think other designers took over with better looking, less athletic models.

@Sound of Music--you've probably noticed that when it comes to Japanese women the question I put to everyone earlier is a largely moot one!

I don't know Andy, I've noticed that, at least over here, Japanese women tend to blossom...I don't know, it may be the south florida sun...

I was going to segue that into men, but it might be too close to the line...

(or well over!)

:D

I've never seen a Japanese man at a health spa or on the beach...Andy, do you go to those baths?

Some of us don't need our Gluteus Maximus adding to - although, being male, that might be a bit....well....I mean... When you get to the bottom of the hole, stop digging!

They actually have padding over here for mens and womens pecs and gluts; I've seen a few people wearing the glut ones...it always reminds me of a toddler with a moist diaper..

dafydd manton

07-05-2010, 05:58 PM

And they say that the codpiece is a thing of the past!!!!

The Atheist

07-05-2010, 09:35 PM

Well, I don't think Steffi looks happy with Agassi, he just keeps her busy with babies and fundraising...she'll figure it out one day...decide she wants a man at least as tall as she is...
Do you have an extra room for her, Atheist?

Hell yeah!

Tall, I can do as well!

Is Mauresmo really a He/She...I notice they don't have her doing any underwear modeling.

She's female alright, but an avowed lesbian, which either is or isn't a good sales pitch, I imagine.

You're right about the Williams sisters...the papers always make them out as twins. I think they tried to put their own line of clothing out, supposedly directed to, what they said, was the afro-american figure and larger women...I think other designers took over with better looking, less athletic models.

:lol:

They actually have padding over here for mens and womens pecs and gluts; I've seen a few people wearing the glut ones...it always reminds me of a toddler with a moist diaper..

:puke:

And they say that the codpiece is a thing of the past!!!!

I've caught plenty of cod in my time, but I can never figure what piece to use?

dafydd manton

07-06-2010, 05:39 AM

A man shoving a 20lb item down his jockey shorts - hmm - there's something fishy about that.

andrewoberg

07-06-2010, 06:47 AM

I don't know Andy, I've noticed that, at least over here, Japanese women tend to blossom...I don't know, it may be the south florida sun...

Or the American diet!:biggrin5:

I've never seen a Japanese man at a health spa or on the beach...Andy, do you go to those baths?

Yes. What would you like to know about the bodies of Japanese men?:rolleyes:

soundofmusic

07-06-2010, 11:24 PM

And they say that the codpiece is a thing of the past!!!!
The problem is they make all of the prosthesises out of the same stuff; but while you might want a certain jello like movement in some parts, it's almost laughable in others.

Hell yeah!

Tall, I can do as well!

She's female alright, but an avowed lesbian, which either is or isn't a good sales pitch, I imagine.

I've caught plenty of cod in my time, but I can never figure what piece to use?

I'm sure once Steffi has had a good, strong, NZ man; she'll never go back...

I wonder how that works, would she be too masculine for a gay woman...

I've caught plenty of cold fish in my time; lately, they've all been minnows and I'm throwing them all back...I'm getting a sudden feeling of deja vu....

Where is Jocky, when we need a good limmerick...

A man shoving a 20lb item down his jockey shorts - hmm - there's something fishy about that.

Or the American diet!:biggrin5:

Yes. What would you like to know about the bodies of Japanese men?:rolleyes:

So that's it, instead of sending American Women to Japan; we'll send a few Burger King frachises...

:blush2: Well, you see, Andy, I am looking for enlightenment; here, in the states, our television shows show us a chinese fellow or a laotion and tell us he's Japanese...kind of like they used to do when they dressed up people from brooklyn as american indians....

andrewoberg

07-06-2010, 11:34 PM

Is it true that in Japan as well as padded bras, there are also padded knickers, to give a little more shape to the Gluteus Maximus.

I have never seen those, and gods willing I never will! Actually, in the derriere region, Japanese women tend to already be endowed.

stlukesguild

07-06-2010, 11:37 PM

OK. Has anyone tried this stuff?

http://www.merchantduvin.com/pages/5_breweries/ss_stingo_sellsheet_lores.pdf

I was at my local beer provider picking up some Sam Smith Imperial Stout when I came across this stuff: aged in century old oak barrels for at least a full year. Sounds interesting... but at $10 US per bottle it better be phenomenal!!!

I put it off for the time being... sticking with a cluster of Imperial Stouts and a Fosters with my steaks on the grill... after a long sweaty day at the studio.

andrewoberg

07-06-2010, 11:37 PM

:blush2: Well, you see, Andy, I am looking for enlightenment; here, in the states, our television shows show us a chinese fellow or a laotion and tell us he's Japanese...kind of like they used to do when they dressed up people from brooklyn as american indians....

What can I possibly say to this?:smilewinkgrin:

Nothing will beat Mickey Rourke in "Breakfast at Tiffany's"!

The Atheist

07-07-2010, 12:26 AM

OK. Has anyone tried this stuff?

8% alcohol, at least you'd get drunk quickly!

I must look around for some.

soundofmusic

07-07-2010, 05:53 PM

I have never seen those, and gods willing I never will! Actually, in the derriere region, Japanese women tend to already be endowed.

I always think it's such a sad thing; the ethnic girls look so hot with their tiny waists and perky pecs; suddenly, they come of age and they look like a team of wasps bit them....bang, out pops the derriere, gravity takes over on top...

OK. Has anyone tried this stuff?

I was at my local beer provider picking up some Sam Smith Imperial Stout when I came across this stuff: aged in century old oak barrels for at least a full year. Sounds interesting... but at $10 US per bottle it better be phenomenal!!!

I put it off for the time being... sticking with a cluster of Imperial Stouts and a Fosters with my steaks on the grill... after a long sweaty day at the studio.

I don't even like beer; but something that expensive is tempting...

What can I possibly say to this?:smilewinkgrin:
Nothing will beat Mickey Rourke in "Breakfast at Tiffany's"!

Well, from what I have seen of the Japanese/Chinese/Laotion fellows, they also have well padded derrieres...
Are American men...are you american...popular in Japan?
I've never seen Breakfast at Tiffanys; I'll have to see it just to see "the mick" doing...what is it, an asian fellow? I think this guy is still alive, he was born in 1920; would you believe it?

8% alcohol, at least you'd get drunk quickly!

I must look around for some.

I've noticed that the "best beers" are also the ones with the highest alcohol content; it makes me curious if they are also superior in flavor.
There was a beer called Sam Adams Triple Bock made in the '90s with a 17% alcohol content. Oh, I liked this, there is also one by Stone Brewing called Arrogant Bastard ale with a 7.2% content

The Atheist

07-07-2010, 06:45 PM

Oh, I liked this, there is also one by Stone Brewing called Arrogant Bastard ale with a 7.2% content

Ha! That's my other name!

I have to buy some.

dafydd manton

07-07-2010, 06:48 PM

Just tell me where I can get Evan Evan's Cwrw. Last time I managed to find it was in a little village called Llangrannog, in West Wales, but not seen it since. (Breaks off to sob uncontrollably)

The Atheist

07-07-2010, 10:27 PM

Just tell me where I can get Evan Evan's Cwrw. Last time I managed to find it was in a little village called Llangrannog, in West Wales, but not seen it since. (Breaks off to sob uncontrollably)

But can you pronounce the name of the place without spitting?

Even Dylan Thomas didn't speak Welsh. What is it with Wales? Where did it all go wrong?

Iechyd da!

Gilliatt Gurgle

07-07-2010, 10:46 PM

... Oh, I liked this, there is also one by Stone Brewing called Arrogant Bastard ale with a 7.2% content

hehe. My brother in law dropped a bottle of AB in my Easter basket one year.
It wasn't too bad from what I recall.

Most folks down here just get the cheap stuff like Lone Star, but they will mix in a shot of bourbon to increase the RPM's.

But can you pronounce the name of the place without spitting?

Even Dylan Thomas didn't speak Welsh. What is it with Wales? Where did it all go wrong?

Iechyd da!

Ha ha! - laughing like Walter Brennan ...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsnPpt4r7mk

Hey, speaking of Dean Martin and drinking (and ladies):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SX8Xb3MSxok

Gilliatt

soundofmusic

07-07-2010, 10:54 PM

Ha! That's my other name!

I have to buy some.

They really ought to have your picture holding a beer on the front of that label; by the way, what percentage of alcohol are you?

Just tell me where I can get Evan Evan's Cwrw. Last time I managed to find it was in a little village called Llangrannog, in West Wales, but not seen it since. (Breaks off to sob uncontrollably)

They actually have their own site; I even found (on google) a list of pubs in England that carry it...so dry your tears man.

But can you pronounce the name of the place without spitting?

Even Dylan Thomas didn't speak Welsh. What is it with Wales? Where did it all go wrong?

Iechyd da!

Wait a minute, is it the words that make them spit...When I was in England, I always refused to sit any closer than the third row so that I didn't get sprayed during Shakespeare...

hehe. My brother in law dropped a bottle of AB in my Easter basket one year.
It wasn't too bad from what I recall.

Most folks down here just get the cheap stuff like Lone Star, but they will mix in a shot of bourbon to increase the RPM's.

Ha ha! - laughing like Walter Brennan ...http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wsnPpt4r7mk

Hey, speaking of Dean Martin and drinking (and ladies):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SX8Xb3MSxok

Gilliatt

Wow, you get cool Easter Baskets! It was nice to remember Walter Brennan, I loved the old fellow; what was he a regular on...
Oh, an Dean was hot in those days....

dafydd manton

07-08-2010, 06:04 AM

But can you pronounce the name of the place without spitting?

Even Dylan Thomas didn't speak Welsh. What is it with Wales? Where did it all go wrong?

Iechyd da!

Dylan Thomas didn't speak Welsh because he came from Swansea, where you hardly ever hear Welsh, but in recompense, he spoke English in such a way that after an evening in Brown's most people thought it was Welsh. You will have heard that it always rains in Wales. Not so - it's low-flying saliva.

Where did it go wrong? Got a year to spare whilst I explain? Assuming that either of us could stay awake!!!!!

The Atheist

07-08-2010, 07:57 PM

Dylan Thomas didn't speak Welsh because he came from Swansea, where you hardly ever hear Welsh, but in recompense, he spoke English in such a way that after an evening in Brown's most people thought it was Welsh. You will have heard that it always rains in Wales. Not so - it's low-flying saliva.

:lol:

I know quite a few Welsh refugees in NZ, mainly as a result of having been married to the daughter of two of them for some years a while back. The ex-in-laws were from [the slums of] Cardiff. The old fella was a good bloke - he'd have been right at home in here - loved a laugh and a drink. Always asked the waiter/ress in restaurants for a "Welsh coffee" after dinner.

Of course, said prole, not having a clue, asks what that is.

"It's just like an Irish coffee but you 'ave a leek in it!"

The mother was just (%&$^#*%^&&_&*_)%^$^#^$#^*%*) or words to that effect. She-devil doesn't come into it.

I agree on Thomas' voice - I've heard his Under Milk Wood, from New York, I think.

Lovely man - just liked his grog a bit too much, just like the ex-FIL.

Where did it go wrong? Got a year to spare whilst I explain? Assuming that either of us could stay awake!!!!!

Haha!

I have all sorts of theories why Irish, Scots and Welsh people show the peculiarities they do. Just about all of those theories have to do with England, funnily enough.

Being English, I'll gladly expound on them!

:D

The Atheist

07-09-2010, 04:10 PM

Busy times over here - Baby Atheist turned one yesterday, granddad flying up from Wellington for the day, baking birthday cakes...

All to be followed tomorrow by Kaed's 8th birthday - party at the 10-pin bowling, baking birthday cakes....

I'll try to get some pics up of the cakes!

:D

dafydd manton

07-09-2010, 04:13 PM

andrewoberg

07-10-2010, 04:44 AM

Children? Grandchildren? Are you one of we wrinkly types? Egad, there was me thinking you you were one of these sprightly 25-year-olds with smooth skin and the rest, and there you are, like me, stirring ingredients in the kitchen (presumably to a CD of something 70s!)

You'll always be sprightly in my mind, Atheist...:smilewinkgrin:

And despite my relative youth (30s), I only spin the Dead, kitchen or elsewhere!

The Atheist

07-10-2010, 03:55 PM

Children? Grandchildren? Are you one of we wrinkly types? Egad, there was me thinking you you were one of these sprightly 25-year-olds with smooth skin and the rest, and there you are, like me, stirring ingredients in the kitchen (presumably to a CD of something 70s!)

:D

No, I don't have any grandchildren yet, but certainly wrinkly. At 50, there are lots of grandparents younger than me. My 19 yo has dated chicks with grandparents younger than me!

I'm one of those awful dads that look like a grandad!

stlukesguild

07-10-2010, 11:17 PM

stlukesguild

07-11-2010, 12:05 AM

http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4097/4781947806_2de27e75b8.jpg

Absolutely stunning singer!!! My secular, non-believing, Jewish studio mate ended up singing along with Mahalia when I played her in the studio. He jokes that he would love for me to have her played at his funeral just so that I could watch all his relatives jaws drop. Her... or Johnny Cash singing "Keep Your Eyes on Jesus":lol: This music makes you realize, as the liner notes suggest, that it is quite possible that it was not rock-n-roll that infused gospel with such energy but rather it was gospel that might have infused rock-n-roll with a spiritual energy and electricity. A great many of the founders of rock (Elvis, Ray Charles, Jerry Lee Lewis, even Little Richard) were deeply impassioned about gospel music and religion.

The Atheist

07-11-2010, 02:34 AM

Another weekend... another long, hot, sweaty day in the studio painting... another cook=out in the back yard (barbecued chicken)... and another slew of beers which I'm now topping off with a couple Young's Double Chocolates. This beer is so decadent it is not to be believed. It is as if they found a way to merge iced mocha espresso with beer!

As usual Miles is blaring...

Oh, I'm coming!

I love a good chocolate beer and Miles will do me anytime.

Absolutely stunning singer!!! My secular, non-believing, Jewish studio mate ended up singing along with Mahalia when I played her in the studio. He jokes that he would love for me to have her played at his funeral just so that I could watch all his relatives jaws drop. Her... or Johnny Cash singing "Keep Your Eyes on Jesus":lol: This music makes you realize, as the liner notes suggest, that it is quite possible that it was not rock-n-roll that infused gospel with such energy but rather it was gospel that might have infused rock-n-roll with a spiritual energy and electricity. A great many of the founders of rock (Elvis, Ray Charles, Jerry Lee Lewis, even Little Richard) were deeply impassioned about gospel music and religion.

You may be right. All Elvis ever wanted to please Mama singing gospel.

And I agree on the passion front, too - the emotional involvement powers through.

Works the other way as well - Iron Maiden would be aluminium alloy without Satan.

:D

soundofmusic

07-12-2010, 12:39 AM

You will have heard that it always rains in Wales. Not so - it's low-flying saliva.

Where did it go wrong? Got a year to spare whilst I explain? Assuming that either of us could stay awake!!!!!

I'd say it rains in all of Britain, I also never took the front rows in the classroom. Hey, what happened to Dylan Thomas' face when he was older; I just saw him reading "Do not go..." on youtube...his face folded in two when he talked; like a badly stuffed bear...

:lol:

I know quite a few Welsh refugees in NZ, mainly as a result of having been married to the daughter of two of them for some years a while back. The ex-in-laws were from [the slums of] Cardiff. The old fella was a good bloke - he'd have been right at home in here - loved a laugh and a drink. Always asked the waiter/ress in restaurants for a "Welsh coffee" after dinner.

Of course, said prole, not having a clue, asks what that is.

"It's just like an Irish coffee but you 'ave a leek in it!"

Haha!

I have all sorts of theories why Irish, Scots and Welsh people show the peculiarities they do. Just about all of those theories have to do with England, funnily enough.

Being English, I'll gladly expound on them!

:D
Don't you hate it when you're married to someone you can't stand; but you like the in-laws...or, at least one...
Is he talking about an onion leek?:ack2:
I want to hear your theories....by the way; where's our favorite Scotsman?

Busy times over here - Baby Atheist turned one yesterday, granddad flying up from Wellington for the day, baking birthday cakes...

All to be followed tomorrow by Kaed's 8th birthday - party at the 10-pin bowling, baking birthday cakes....

I'll try to get some pics up of the cakes!

:D

So, do people in NZ all become fertile in October/November:idea:
We definitely want to see your baking prowess...
And Happy Birthday to all the little Atheists:bday_2:

Children? Grandchildren? Are you one of we wrinkly types? Egad, there was me thinking you you were one of these sprightly 25-year-olds with smooth skin and the rest, and there you are, like me, stirring ingredients in the kitchen (presumably to a CD of something 70s!)

Nah, take a look at Atheist on his page; he's still in fine form...still chasing around a young wife and having little atheists...

The Atheist

07-12-2010, 04:01 PM

I'd say it rains in all of Britain, I also never took the front rows in the classroom. Hey, what happened to Dylan Thomas' face when he was older; I just saw him reading "Do not go..." on youtube...his face folded in two when he talked; like a badly stuffed bear...

Appropriately, just like a pickled pear.

Don't you hate it when you're married to someone you can't stand; but you like the in-laws...or, at least one...

Never been in that situation, fortunately, and the only ex-in-law I have is the true beast from hell. When she croaks, I am dead-set shaving the hag's hair to find the 666 tattooed on it.

In-laws are something I've always avoided like the plague. I am the miles-youngest of six kids, so got to see all my siblings' relationships with their kids/parents/each other over time.

I quickly realised that when even someone as smart as my old man - who was able to find humour in anything - couldn't deal with in-law relationships. Mutual avoidance works just fine; telephones and the internet are the perfect medium for in-laws. Works brilliantly with the current lot.

Is he talking about an onion leek?:ack2:

Yep.

I don't know whether you have the same colloquialism for "leak", which means urinate.

I want to hear your theories....by the way; where's our favorite Scotsman?

Sean Connery?

:D

I suspect Scotland is presently having its fortnight of summer and jocky's being harangued into changing the slates on his roof - almost certainly at great threat to life and limb!

So, do people in NZ all become fertile in October/November:idea:
We definitely want to see your baking prowess...
And Happy Birthday to all the little Atheists:bday_2:

It's almost embarrassing! Seems like we only do it in the springtime.

:D

Pictures of cakes coming later today!

Paulclem

07-12-2010, 04:23 PM

The Atheist

07-12-2010, 10:24 PM

Ok, here we go:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/qcake.jpg

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/kcake.jpg

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s97/TheAtheist/bcake.jpg

You can probably guess which one's which!

soundofmusic

07-13-2010, 03:15 PM

Appropriately, just like a pickled pear.

In-laws are something I've always avoided like the plague. I am the miles-youngest of six kids, so got to see all my siblings' relationships with their kids/parents/each other over time.

I quickly realised that when even someone as smart as my old man - who was able to find humour in anything - couldn't deal with in-law relationships. Mutual avoidance works just fine; telephones and the internet are the perfect medium for in-laws. Works brilliantly with the current lot.

Yep.

I don't know whether you have the same colloquialism for "leak", which means urinate.

Sean Connery?

:D

I suspect Scotland is presently having its fortnight of summer and jocky's being harangued into changing the slates on his roof - almost certainly at great threat to life and limb!

It's almost embarrassing! Seems like we only do it in the springtime.

Really, but the guys eye is dragging and there is a fold like double doors on his mouth:confused:
I thought you liked the first Mrs Atheists dad? But yes, I've found that most in laws are best at a distance; particularly if they really like you before the marriage. Paul and Gilliatt seem to have loving in-laws though.
Yes, our old ladies and children in nappies leak over here; but a leek in a drink:ack2:
Glad to hear Jockys just doing work; though I hope he's not taking his favorite drinks up the ladder with him...I was afraid he contracted moditis

:biggrin5:

It reminded me that my sister wanted to play Ring of Fire byJohnny Cash at My Dad's cremation.
I would have loved to see that, all the folks stomping and dancing. I was present at an Irish wake once...it was a little unnerving.

Ok, here we go:

They look so scrumptious...I love the color of that heart cakes icing. How did you make the little ball and pins?

prendrelemick

07-13-2010, 03:22 PM

Like those Cake lifter-uppers.

The Atheist

07-13-2010, 04:07 PM

I thought you liked the first Mrs Atheists dad?

Yeah, he was ok, but died long ago, not long after we were married.

They look so scrumptious...I love the color of that heart cakes icing. How did you make the little ball and pins?

I racked my brains over that and was going to use marzipan, but I had a go with stiff icing mix and it worked!

Like those Cake lifter-uppers.

:lol:

soundofmusic

07-14-2010, 09:22 PM

:D

No, I don't have any grandchildren yet, but certainly wrinkly. At 50, there are lots of grandparents younger than me. My 19 yo has dated chicks with grandparents younger than me!

I'm one of those awful dads that look like a grandad!

Do you think you enjoy the babies now more than when you were younger; or are more patient. I don't think I could manage those all-nighters I used to pull when my daughter was a newborn.

Like those Cake lifter-uppers.

Those are very cool; I'd love those for a turkey, too. Hey Atheist, do you do turkey; how do you get the legs to not overcook while you're getting the breast done?

Yeah, he was ok, but died long ago, not long after we were married.

I racked my brains over that and was going to use marzipan, but I had a go with stiff icing mix and it worked!

:lol:

'm amazed! is that a buttercream icing; I never would have thought of marzipan either. I recently tried to fill a 2 layer with pudding; it moved all over. Tasted good, but looked silly.

The Atheist

07-14-2010, 10:01 PM

Do you think you enjoy the babies now more than when you were younger; or are more patient. I don't think I could manage those all-nighters I used to pull when my daughter was a newborn.

Yes, that is the hard part - the all-night crying sessions are hard work. I don't think it's any easier, you just know what to expect.

'm amazed! is that a buttercream icing; I never would have thought of marzipan either. I recently tried to fill a 2 layer with pudding; it moved all over. Tasted good, but looked silly.

Yep, just normal butter & icing sugar icing. Just heavy on the icing sugar. I was surpsied it stuck together, but it set hard and of course, got eaten!

prendrelemick

07-15-2010, 03:50 AM

The Atheist

07-15-2010, 02:54 PM

I'm a newish Grandad, and its brilliant. You get all the love, all those funny poignant moments all the laughs - without the broken nights.

You know all those magazines for the older female, like Womans Realm, and Peoples Friend where Grannies send in cute pictures of Grandchilden with sickly anecdotes of the cute things they've said and done ? Well thats me now. I can't believe it!:sick:

:lol:

I can't wait!

On the other hand, given my oldest son's propensity for sowing his oats, I could be in the situation of having a kid and a grandchild almost the same age in the near future.

:D

soundofmusic

07-15-2010, 08:33 PM

Yes, that is the hard part - the all-night crying sessions are hard work. I don't think it's any easier, you just know what to expect.

Yep, just normal butter & icing sugar icing. Just heavy on the icing sugar. I was surpsied it stuck together, but it set hard and of course, got eaten!

I guess that is what really tires the new parent out, the panic. I called the doctor for every little cry.
That's amazing! You should do some you tube cake decorating...I'll watch...

I'm a newish Grandad, and its brilliant. You get all the love, all those funny poignant moments all the laughs - without the broken nights.

You know all those magazines for the older female, like Womans Realm, and Peoples Friend where Grannies send in cute pictures of Grandchilden with sickly anecdotes of the cute things they've said and done ? Well thats me now. I can't believe it!:sick:

You mean the kids still haven't left baby at grans so that you can share in the broken nights sleep?
I still hate those baby diving in the chocolate cake pictures and bathtub pics should be stopped before 3...

:lol:

I can't wait!

On the other hand, given my oldest son's propensity for sowing his oats, I could be in the situation of having a kid and a grandchild almost the same age in the near future.

:D

Considering dads fertility, your son might be a grandad when you and Mrs Atheist are still having little Atheist...are you going for a soccer team?

The Atheist

07-15-2010, 10:53 PM

I guess that is what really tires the new parent out, the panic. I called the doctor for every little cry.

Haha! Yeah, that soon wears off. This one will need to be at least dark blue before the word "doctor" gets mentioned!

Considering dads fertility, your son might be a grandad when you and Mrs Atheist are still having little Atheist...are you going for a soccer team?

No worries on that score, I've blogged about my vasectomy!

(it was just a couple of years too late!)

soundofmusic

07-16-2010, 05:16 PM

Haha! Yeah, that soon wears off. This one will need to be at least dark blue before the word "doctor" gets mentioned!

No worries on that score, I've blogged about my vasectomy!

(it was just a couple of years too late!)

I don't know, it may have something with being a nurse and little sounds going into the medical field; but I still take off work when she flushes or coughs...

Hay, I looked for that vasectomy blog, I was expecting a blow by blow detail...are you (as my dad used to say) horsing me?

I'm sure Steffi is going to be very upset about your surgery:lol:

The Atheist

07-16-2010, 09:45 PM

I don't know, it may have something with being a nurse and little sounds going into the medical field; but I still take off work when she flushes or coughs...

Oh god, no; we're miles beyond that.

If one of ours is coughing up blood, or has a temerature over 45 C, we might ring a doctor, but other than that, TAKE THE PAIN!

:D

Hay, I looked for that vasectomy blog, I was expecting a blow by blow detail...are you (as my dad used to say) horsing me?

Blow by blow (http://www.charman.co.nz/front/vasectomy.htm) is certainly is! It's just not so easy to find. It's also a lot more painful than I let on in there!

Pain!

^%##^$@$(#^@@!!! Keee-rist it hurts the day after! The stretching pays back about 24-36 hours after the surgery and it is no picnic. Goes away, though.

I'm sure Steffi is going to be very upset about your surgery:lol:

Nah, no pay for play!

:D

soundofmusic

07-17-2010, 05:54 PM

Blow by blow (http://www.charman.co.nz/front/vasectomy.htm) is certainly is! It's just not so easy to find. It's also a lot more painful than I let on in there!

Pain!

^%##^$@$(#^@@!!! Keee-rist it hurts the day after! The stretching pays back about 24-36 hours after the surgery and it is no picnic. Goes away, though.

Nah, no pay for play!

:D

See, women have always claimed the vasectomy is a piece of cake...you should put this on youtube. Give men a talking to before they consider it:nono:
I was just looking over your other notice to see if I can take advantage of the great weather of NZ, the strong sexy men and your barbques:cheers2:

The Atheist

07-17-2010, 06:46 PM

See, women have always claimed the vasectomy is a piece of cake...you should put this on youtube. Give men a talking to before they consider it:nono:

I would, just to disspell the myths, but in the end, I'd still rather blokes got sucked into a little pain as opposed to the alternatives. It's why the blog itself doesn't get involved in the bruising! :eek6: or the pain or any of the negatives - I suspect a large majority of men would use any excuse to avoid the operation.

Very few watch, apparently, as I did. Episiotomy, vasectomy, open-heart surgery - I find it all fascinating.

I was just looking over your other notice to see if I can take advantage of the great weather of NZ, the strong sexy men and your barbques:cheers2:

Take a trip!

Weather - today, in the middle of winter, the coldest month of the year, I've just got back from fishing & shooting with Kaed. 9 am and we're standing comfortably in t-shirts. No fish, but he scared a few birds with the shooting! The northern third of the North Island has the perfect climate for humans - never too hot nor too cold.

Today is sensational - just like yesterday!

:D

Barbecue is ready to go at any time! Blue steak a specialty.

Strong sexy men? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q25aJ6UNvhw)

Paulclem

07-19-2010, 07:11 AM

I would, just to disspell the myths, but in the end, I'd still rather blokes got sucked into a little pain as opposed to the alternatives. It's why the blog itself doesn't get involved in the bruising! :eek6: or the pain or any of the negatives - I suspect a large majority of men would use any excuse to avoid the operation.

Very few watch, apparently, as I did. Episiotomy, vasectomy, open-heart surgery - I find it all fascinating.

Take a trip!

Weather - today, in the middle of winter, the coldest month of the year, I've just got back from fishing & shooting with Kaed. 9 am and we're standing comfortably in t-shirts. No fish, but he scared a few birds with the shooting! The northern third of the North Island has the perfect climate for humans - never too hot nor too cold.

Today is sensational - just like yesterday!

:D

Barbecue is ready to go at any time! Blue steak a specialty.

Strong sexy men? (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q25aJ6UNvhw)

Ah the chop. I particularly remember the smirk on my wife's face...

I found tea tree oil as an antiseptic to be very good.