Make A Wish

[Misscaroline]

Granted, but no one can write any of it down. So the world dissolves yet again into its post-Babel state because people like you and I refuse to let our ideas and experiences fade away.

I wish that I had a wormhole.

[ShoutGrace]

Granted! Sadly, the wormhole is located somewhere close to your frontal lobe, and soon all your thoughts and intentions pass through your wormhole and dissipate in the atmosphere. *whooooooooooooooosh*


I wish I had an attractive, hardworking and compassionate french maid.

[dramasnot6]

Kindly thanks Pen! http://www.websmileys.com/sm/happy/059.gifThat was very generous of youhttp://www.websmileys.com/sm/angels/heilig.gifhttp://www.websmileys.com/sm/love/088.gif
Granted, but she would be there illegally and have to be brought back to France very soon :p

I wish animals really could talk

[Misscaroline]

Actually, Shouty, that's a pretty accurate description of me to begin with...:D

Granted, but the police come and haul you in for questioning. They thought you were trying to film an illicit video...:blush:Oh, and she quits the next day because she thought you were, too, and is appalled that Shouty would act in such a manner!

I wish that my teacher didn't always try and steal my journal. I get the impression she's stealing my intellectual material sometimes...

[Misscaroline]

Oh, sorry, Drame. I got distracted.

Granted, but they won't shut up, so you no longer listen to the animal rights people ever again...

Same wish as above.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but it turns out she was getting it published to make you rich $$$ and you missed out!

I wish all my friends here could talk with me all in the same convo on messenger :(

[ShoutGrace]

I wish all my friends here could talk with me all in the same convo on messenger :(


Have you heard of meebo PAM? Uh, wait . . .

Granted! But the clamoring of all your numerous friends in this conversation is overwhelming, and this purportedly great allowance drives you looney.


I wish I could have a french maid without being suspected of having uncouth intentions towards her.

[Misscaroline]

Ah, I like being a hermit anyways...

Granted, but no one is ever on anymore, so it's totally irrelevant. Sorry.

I wish that I had something besides babysitting Mini Me and integration to look forward to tonight...

[Misscaroline]

Rr....Shouty, sorry.

Granted, but now she looks like a hag and you fire her because she's not attractive enough, even though you lie and tell her it's because she's lazy.

Same wish.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but after hours of looking forward to it, it suddenly gets cancelled.

I wish for everyone to spend less money on meaningless possesions and donate it to charity

[Misscaroline]

S'better than Mini MC...

Granted, but everyone donates to the Donald Trump's New Toupee Fund, so while it's well spent, it's still kind of pointless...

I wish that I didn't have to make my way through centuries of women's literature while firmly denying that I am a feminist...

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but now you are a feminist.

I wish this thread was unneccesary because everyone's unharmful wishes came true.

[Misscaroline]

That's funny Drame... unlikely as all hell, but funny...

Granted, but then they'd be ruined in real life instead of just here.

I wish that life wasn't such a batch...

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but then we couldnt appreciate the times when it's not :D

I wish dogs and cats could get along

[alhara]

they actually can, but granted all the same but now dogs and cats like eachother better than humane and we have no more furry friends
i wish i had access to all music past present and future (and i don´t go deaf)

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but youre arrested for life for obtaining it by very illegal means and never get to enjoy it :(

I wish the novels I'm reading would all be able to temporarily shrink to fit into my pocket so i can read whenever i want.

[ktd222]

Sure, but then you would have no place to put your wallet.

I wish I could breath equally well on both sides of my nostrils.

[RobinHood3000]

Granted. They're both clogged.

I wish for a cape.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but it's not your size and ends up strangling you

I wish to attend an Animals Rights protest

[ShoutGrace]

Granted! Sadly, during the protest a dog breaks loose from the crowd of onlookers and mauls you beyond recognition . . . you then petition the local government not to punish the dog.


I wish uplifting movies would actually uplift me.

[zanna]

Granted, but now you're stuck to the ceiling, a most inconvienient place to do anything from!

I wish I wasn't being nagged about homework while on break!

[aeroport]

Granted - now you are spending all your time doing homework!

I wish I could still play the piano a little.

[zanna]

Granted, but you can't remember any good songs, and you don't have any good music. And you're bad at improv. (well, i am)

I wish i could articulate myself better.

[aeroport]

Granted, only you hurt my feelings so much trashing on my piano playing that you find yourself now with a thick layer of duct tape standing between you and perfect self-expression.

I wish I could get by with less sleep.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. But now you work four full time jobs, and there is actually no time for sleep.

I wish I could decide on the right color of epoxy.

[zanna]

Granted, but by the time it drys, it doesn't match anymore.

I wish I hadn't insulted James! :(

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but it turns out he actually enjoyed it and was playing along and now he doesnt think you to be so witty.

i wish there were more stars in the sky

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. Unfortunately, now there's an overcrowding of stars in the sky, and they get pushed out one by one and fall to Earth (you know, the center of the Universe). Thanks.

I wish I could sleep in the snow without freezing to death.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you have to wear so many layers that you cant move and die from starvation.

I wish my writing skills were better.

[zanna]

granted, but you get to be such a snob about it, nobody reads you any longer.

i wish i could fix my sonnet! still not happy with it. :(

[dramasnot6]

Granted, i think it is very good already and doesnt need fixing! Perhaps maybe your self-confidence does though? Im a perfectionist too, i know its hard to accept things you create as good but sometimes they work the way they are. And yours is very good! :D

I wish zanna wouldnt be so down on her writing :(

[zanna]

Lol, granted, but then I develop a complex, and get mad when my friend doesn't like the sonnet I wrote for him (well, I sure hope not.)

I wish that he does like it when I give it to him.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, it is from the heart and therefore if it is given to someone from the heart it will be loved. Ill "spoil" it by saying he might be too touched and flattered for words, you may mistaken for dislike and be offended :p ;)

I wish everyone would recycle

[zanna]

Granted, but then the recycling companies become all corrupted and evil . . . Bwoohahahahahahahaha!

I wish that after the poem debacle :) we can be friends again.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but then he would have loved it so much he would demand more from you, causing major stress attacks on your part :p

I wish for a little bit of spare money to buy more music with...

[zanna]

Oooh, verreh good point.
Granted, but then the neighbors get mad at you for blasting you music at "crazy" hours of the night.

I wish for peace on earth.

[Pendragon]

I"m not going there... we'll this one unruined!

I wish for a faster internet connection! :flare:

[dramasnot6]

Granted , but then everyone wants to use your computer and you never get to enjoy it.

I wish for a miracle

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. But said non-descript miracle miraculously blows up in your face, to non-descript dire consequences.

I wish I were familiar with MS DOS.

[Madhuri]

Granted. Now you'll see only a dull black screen constantly, and you wont have any access to litnet. Boring commands will keep you company.

I wish I could just run away.

[Laindessiel]

And let the German Shepherds set free! http://www.cosgan.de/images/more/schilder/083.gif

I wish I could have the latest Nokia NSeries!

[Misscaroline]

Granted, but even as you read this, it's already obsolete...

I wish that I had been here for the holidays and not trapped in a house with 6 Slovak Catholics!!!!

[Virgil]

Granted, but they lifted the religous preaching restriction on lit net and every religious person from all the religions started preaching to you directly.


I wish I knew how to jitter bug.

[Misscaroline]

Granted, but my Slovak gran's the one teaching you, and she keeps getting it all jumbled and confusing you. (This actually happened on Xmas eve....)

I wish that I was born in the right era...

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you die of a common disease of that era soon after :p

I wish people would always support their arguments

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. But now every discussion that you engage in contains an inordinate amount of empirical evidence arranged in formal syllogisms. Dull.

I wish that my favorite sweater were not falling apart; I wish the elbows would renew themselves.

[zanna]

Granted, but the rest looks funky now that the elbows are good.

I wish it wasn't so late.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, youd be moved to a place with a timezone in which it's earlier, but suffer terrible jet lag and not be able to use your time anyway.

I wish there was no such thing as animal abuse.

[zanna]

Granted, but people take their anger out on each other more to compensate, starting WWIII (thus killing lots of animals in the process.)

I wish I could easily talk to my friend. Still haven't seen him. :(

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you two would be trapped in a room together for many weeks and get sick of eachother fast.

I wish for a laugh

[kathycf]

Granted. The laugh never leaves though, so all your friends start avoiding you and dogs howl when you walk past.

I wish a genie would appear and make me a cup of tea.

[Riesa]

Granted! but it's Hemlock tea.

I wish I was packing for a long trip to Greece.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you arent actually going to greece and everyone considers you insane.

I wish nobody was judgemental of other's appearance

[Riesa]

Granted! but nobody cares at all how they look, or smell, anymore.

I wish I had a pair of those socks with individual toes, like gloves for feet.

[samercury]

I love those so much X)

granted but you have no gloves and it's freezing outside

I wish it was January

[Riesa]

Samercury, you pop up like a cheeky wildflower impatient for spring.

(ah, those old haiku,
still remain close to my heart,
so sentimental)

Granted! It's January forever!!!!!!!!! ugh.

I wish I knew how to tango.

[kathycf]

Granted, you now know how to tango. Sadly, every other bit of knowledge flees from your brain. This leaves you tangoing down the street mumbling ole to yourself with a rose in your mouth instead of being online here at litnet.

I wish I didn't have such a dry mouth.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but now you are drooling and can not stop even in public places.

I wish for a treat

[zanna]

Granted, but you have to do something insanely spectacular if you want to enjoy it.

I wish I could have French Toast right about now . . . .

[Poetess]

I wish silence drops by

[kathycf]

Granted. Silence drops by and even brings some French Toast for zanna. Silence gets so comfortable on your couch that it never wants to leave, hogs all the French Toast for itself and life becomes much too dull.

I wish my eyeball didn't hurt all of a sudden.

[samercury]

granted but now both your hands hurt

I wish it was snowing

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but it wouldnt be snowing snow but fire extinguisher foam from a factory explosion and everyone would be sticky and peeved.

I wish for a little more energy

[zanna]

arright. So, you get a whole bunch, and can't go to sleep for a week straight. (so much for a little more, eh?)

I wish for help on my homework.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but it's from an illiterate chimpanzee and you end up doing worse on it then you would have without help.

I wish my hair wouldnt be so hard to take care of

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. Now where did I put those clippers?

I wish I could concentrate on four things at once.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but they would be completely irrelevant things that would be no use to you anyway.

I wish for some inspiration to do my research paper

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. But your muse has a terrible Post-Modern bent, and tries to spark your thought process with things like Red Squares and Toilet Seats. What an odd research paper this will be.

I wish the curse on my coffee (I haven't been able to make a good cup of coffee at my house for about two years (I can make a good cup of coffee elsewhere)) would finally be lifted.

[Shalot]

Granted. But your muse has a terrible Post-Modern bent, and tries to spark your thought process with things like Red Squares and Toilet Seats. What an odd research paper this will be.

I wish the curse on my coffee (I haven't been able to make a good cup of coffee at my house for about two years (I can make a good cup of coffee elsewhere)) would finally be lifted.

My coffee tastes like *** also.

Granted. You can finally make a great cup of coffee. Unfortunately, your bowels can't handle coffee at all anymore, and it makes you so sick that you have to stop drinking it altogether. Too bad.

I wish I didn't have to work on Monday!

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but youd then have to work the following saturday and sunday to make up for it.

I wish my peers wouldnt be so narcicistic

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You have a whole gang of self-deprecating friends, and you now have a full-time job of continually reassuring them that they're not absolutely worthless and stupid and ugly.

I wish the world would cease to attempt a "teleological suspension of the ethical."

[ShoutGrace]

Granted! But seeing as how no one except those as highly educated as yourself could possibly decipher that phrase without at least a minimal effort expenditure, the world ceases its attempt --- but no one notices.

I wish I could remember my German declinations. :(

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but your mind would be cleared of everything else

I wish the New Year will be the best one yet

[Bookworm Cris]

Granted. But it will be worse than the upcoming year (AKA, 2008).

I wish my day had 48 hours.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you would still get the same amount of sleep as in a 24 hour day and go insane from the lack of it.

I wish my dog wouldnt be so excessively greedy for food all the time

[zanna]

Granted, but then you mysteriously can't find clothing, sheets, toilet paper . . .

I wish I didn't have to think about scholarships. :(

[Misscaroline]

Granted, but then you get no money like the rest of us poor schmucks.

I wish that my college applications were *poof* done.

[zanna]

Granted, but they don't have the right information, and when someone is suspicious, you get in big trouble.

I wish I didn't have to weed.

[Misscaroline]

Granted, but then the gnomes overrun your garden and all of your lovely plants die...

I wish that I didn't feel compelled to stay up until the ball drops, when I barely feel interested in the least anyways....

[zanna]

Granted, but then you can't sleep, so it's a catch22.

I wish for more books :)

[Misscaroline]

Granted, but you end up like me, with no room for all of them, and they end up all over the floor- a disgrace to the Binding!!!

I wish beauty contestants would stop wishing for world peace.....

[zanna]

Granted, but then they start wishing for stupid things, like better mascara, or to lose ten pounds . . . . grrr . . .

I wish more people would wish for world peace, but sincerely.

[Misscaroline]

:D Granted, but the wishing does nothing except create a great big whole in our lives, a hole that spouts better mascara and weight gain....

I wish for more Ginger Ale.

[zanna]

Granted, but it's all flat.

I wish for free cell phone minutes.

[Misscaroline]

S'okay. Still love it.

Granted. But they're on your old phone, so it's totally pointless.

I wish white boys could dance...:p ((Fight the stereotypes!))

[zanna]

Some can, you just have to settle for the right kind of dancin'! (Like, they can only jitterbug :lol: )

I wish I could go to the swing dance night with my friend (the same one, Miss C).

[Misscaroline]

Ooh, granted. Except, oh, I don't know, it rains and washes all of your makeup off and he sees the real you. Who is lovely, I presume. I couldn't seriously ruin it- it's too sweet!<3

I wish that I didn't have assignments over my abysmally short winter break...

[zanna]

:) He's seen the "real me," (I) can't stand makeup, but the rain might be bad, because he doesn't care for rain. Thanks. :) And I wish the same thing . . .

Granted, but then you have a million chores, etc.

I wish I didn't have to go . . . :( Maybe we can talk later, Miss C. Thanks again. *hugs, sniff*

[Misscaroline]

Been there, done that. Good luck with the swing man!

Granted, but I'd be leaving soon anyways. So there. Good night, good luck, much love, and happy holidays zanna! Thanks for the company!:D

I wish that there was a genuinely unique boy band. Anytime. Anywhere.

[zanna]

ooh! ooh! In my town . . . Finding Lenny! All boy band, but they are way cool. Currently comin' outta the garage. :) So, granted. We'd just have to see whether you like them or not.

I wish for good times lata' today with my friends.

[shinigami]

Wish granted when you mean later.. it never comes

I wish I was a duck

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you die soon after from being thrown a very stale hunk of bread that happened to hit your head.

I wish sleeping didnt take up so much time.

[zanna]

granted, but you have to sleep (for a shorter amount) at very inconvinient times, then.

I wish melville was a faster read!

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. Try my abridged version of Moby Dick; it's 14 pages!

I wish Kierkegaard were here.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you wouldnt get any chance to see or speak to him because so many philosophers were harrashing him 24/7.

I wish to see Brazil

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. But it's through a very powerful telescope that can somehow see around the curvature of the Earth, like a periscope. I don't know how all the science works, but that's all you get.

I wish I were a philosopher, so I could have a conversation with Kierkegaard when he gets here.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but there would be such a long line that your conversation would be limited to 4 seconds.

I wish tomorrow would be a good day

[shinigami]

Granted that everyday after tomorrow be bad...

I wish my schedule to be less hectic

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you would be assigned to only one task for the entire day that would somehow involve your greatest fear.

I wish I will finnaly get the courage to post up my poem before the contest ends instead of letting it sit in My Documents for another 2 weeks.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. Here's a health helping of courage, with a generous portion of delayed self-doubt on the side. (I hope you do enter; hurry up!)

I wish I could afford a Jesuit education.

[kathycf]

Granted. You now can afford the education and whatever else you want. You decide to become a Jesuit, forgetting that pesky vow of poverty issue. Oh well, wealth was nice while it lasted, eh?

I wish it would finally snow around here!

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but on that day you are whisked off to the Australian bush until the end of winter.

I wish for a better wit

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. Now you are so incredibly, outrageously witty that nobody can understand you--so you have nobody to show your glorious better wit to.

I wish this art class weren't so inane.

[kathycf]

Granted, the class is no longer inane, but all of the people in it make annoying sniffing noises and pick their noses constantly. Sadly,this bothers you much worse than a little inanity ever did.

I wish I had a slice of pizza, fresh from the oven.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Nice wish! Granted. You are suddenly transported to Brooklyn, New York, at the counter of a world famous pizza shop, recieving your piping hot slice. I've made no provision for your return home; you're on your own.

(I dropped that class. Your curse came true, and the nose picking put me right over the brink.)

I wish I had finished this guitar before school started. It's so close to being a real guitar, and now it will have to hang around for a while, until I get settled in with academia.

[kathycf]

Granted. Oddly enough though, our wish granting ill tempered genie had just finished reading the story of Pinocchio and thought you meant "real boy" instead of "real guitar". Your guitar now has a nimble nose and follows you around calling you father. Having nose picking classmates suddenly seems a lot better doesn't it?

I wish I didn't ramble on so....



(I dropped that class. Your curse came true, and the nose picking put me right over the brink.):lol: :lol:

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but then all of us would miss it and bully you till you rambled again! :p

I wish i would get my work done.......

[bluevictim]

Granted, but you do such a good job that you keep getting assigned more work to do.

I wish they'd lower the price of stamps.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted, but half of the Postal Officers are terminated for lack of funding, and now the mail takes four times as long to reach its destination. Thanks. And I've been awaiting an important package. Wait--I'm only supposed to ruin this for you, right? Oh well. What's done is done.

I wish I could read one and one half times faster.

(Stop pestering me, Nimble Nosed Guitar Boy! :lol: )

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you read so fast that you have no time to enjoy or understand what you are reading.

I wish i would follow through my goals more efficiently

[water girl]

granted,but you might not complete all your goals.



I wish I was a Superstar.:) :)


love me, for I am beautiful.:blush: :yawnb:

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you would live a very short and wild star life and die within the week you become one

I wish i could run 20 miles a day with ease

[shinigami]

Granted that you can not walk properly

[shinigami]

**forgot my wish...=p

I wish I could draw better

[Madhuri]

Granted. Now, you can draw a line better. :D

I wish I was always warm and cozy.

[LPRox015]

Granted, but you are taking the warmth and coziness from someone else the longer you remain that way.

I wish I could finish college in one day!

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You have a piece of paper that says you completed college, and completely lack the education that usually accompanies that paper.

I wish I had a giant steel crane.

[Madhuri]

Granted. And, you are the first one it picks up. You look really tiny hanging in the air some 200 ft from the ground :D

I wish I could eat anything and never get fat.

[LPRox015]

Granted. But everything you eat tastes like foam.

I wish I could have more than one wish. ;)

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You have unlimited wishes, but following the constraints of this thread, they are all doomed to be ruined by some trickery of your genie.

I wish you wouldn't ruin all of my wishes.

[dramasnot6]

Granted :) But this is the only one! :p :lol:

I wish more people would participate in the Count to 10,000 Thread!

[Bookworm89]

Grante, but it takes an entire month for each person to post a number. By the time it's finished... well, we won't discuss that.

I wish I didn't have to read The Scarlet Letter for school.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. Now you have to read it for the pure pleasure of reading a great book. (I guess that's not really ruining anything, but only enhancing your wish. Sorry.)

I wish I had not had a professor try to tell me how to turn on a computer today. :rage:

[Bookworm89]

Granted, but you asked the professor how to open a book instead. So that's why your grades are so bad!

I wish I got paid to work.

[SummerSolstice]

I wish I could stand on my head.

(And also retain the ability to stand on my feet--Ha!)

[Jean-Baptiste]

I wish I got paid to work.
Granted. You can work for pay, at minimum wage, for 1 hour per week.


I wish I could stand on my head.

(And also retain the ability to stand on my feet--Ha!)

Granted. But you are now so confused as to which way is up that you remain on your side most of the time.

Since I swooped in and granted two wishes (how thoughtful of me :p ) I'll post two of my own.
I wish I were only five feet ten inches tall.
I wish my hair would remain a constant length so I didn't have to get it cut all the time.

[Bookworm89]

Granted, but everyone else is seven foot tall.

(Working for minimum wage would be great! I volunteer my time, so anything would be an improvement.)

I wish I weren't so addicted to these forums.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but then you would have never discovered the forums in the first place.

I wish my friends would be on yahoo messenger:(

[LPRox015]

Granted. But they forget how to type!

I wish I could speak all languages!

[SummerSolstice]

Whoops!! I plead fatigue on basis of a three-hour square dancing class. Sorry about that!

Drama: Granted, but then for some strange reason Yahoo futzes up your computer, and you have no choice but to switch to a different IMing program--the one, in fact, that all your friends have just abandoned. (Yeah, okay, that actually more or less happened to me...)

Edit: Oy, vey! Overlap! LPRox: Granted, but you're incomprehensible because it's so confusing, you can't speak more than two words of one language in a row!

I wish I was in a class this semester with my good friend from last semester. :(

[Pendragon]

Granted, but you both failed. That's why you are *singing* "Together again!"

I wish people will post on the threads I like and not let them die! :flare:

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You can only like this thread.

I wish there were more to life than just joy and beauty and wonderfulness. :D

[Madhuri]

Granted. But, now you have to make a choice between that more and this less. :D

I wish I could fly

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you are only able to do so in the dark and in a big city. You have to quit after a while because you keep bumping your head into buildings...

I wish I could have a decent, undisturbed sleep for the rest of the year

[kathycf]

Granted, and you are now annoyed at my very obvious in coming answer to your wish....You get to sleep undisturbed for the rest of the year 24/7 and when you awaken in 2008 you have terrible morning breath.

I wish I didn't just run out of Diet Coke.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You didn't just run out. You have a massive supply of Diet Coke--all of which is flat.

I wish I could convince myself of the detriment involved in leading a sedentary life.

[bluevictim]

Granted. Now, not only do you suffer the detriment involved in leading a sedentary life, you feel guilty about it.

I wish spheres were flat.

[the Last 13]

granted....unfortunately earth being flat you fall off the edge...have fun...

I wish today was 'yesterday'....it was a good day

[LPRox015]

Granted, But something goes wrong in the time travel process and you can't stop traveling from yesterday to yesterday!:P

I wish my BF lived closer!:(

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. He does live closer, but you live farther away.

I wish Masaccio would paint my portrait.

[Pendragon]

OK. He takes up Jason Pollack's style for it, however... :p

I wish I knew what makes some art art! http://www.cosgan.de/images/midi/figuren/e060.gif

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You are now the most accomplished and revered art historian and critique in the world, but you no longer know what makes some food food.

Ah! She is so lovely! (That's an example of a tacit wish.)

[Pendragon]

And your new glasses prescription is ready now, step this way. (A tacit response,)

I wish to post no more on the Literary Answers and Questions Game thread…:crash:

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You may post no more in that thread. I'll even go one better: You may post no less in that thread either.

I wish it were still 10:00, rather than 10:02.

[Madhuri]

Granted. But, now it seems you are left behind in the race against time....:D

I wish I knew why Jean wants time to stop.....:)

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You intuitively know my inner-most desire with regard to time, and are now required to explain its intricacies, brilliance, and relevance to all, including myself, in a well written, 25 page paper of the utmost scholarly integrity--you have until Monday.

I wish there were a place I could go to practice singing, where the body politic would be shielded from the horror and inhuman putrescence of such noise.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but it happens to be in Antartica and you get too cold to sing after a while.

I wish I could lose some weight before I get back to school

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. Your fingers are suddenly very slender.

I wish I had an electric guitar--the most wicked and righteous, absolute killer electric guitar.

[kilted exile]

Granted, but all your fingers get chopped off

I wish I had some more trifle

[Riesa]

Granted! but it's just such a trivial amount. :(

I wish spring would hurry up.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. It's just around the bend. But unfortunately you are fated to wander the respective hemispheres of the globe, in perpetual Winter.

I wish I could wander the respective hemisphere's in perpetual Summer.

[Madhuri]

Granted. But, it is only on one condition that you have to always be in perpetual winter.

I wish the day had 48 hours so that I could write the 25 pages masterpiece that Jean wants me to write. :D

[the Last 13]

granted but with all the extra time to have fun you decide not to write the paper....

I think this really is granting 2 wishes but ahh whatever....

I wish I never could become tired...but retain the ability to fall asleep if i want to

[Reccura]

Yeah, you may fall asleep... but you're going to have nightmares all the same.

I wish I graduated from college and go to Italy...

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but you would have spent all your money on the Graduation celebrations that you had to carpool to Italy and have trouble getting a job there.

I wish to be filled with energy for the next few hours

[Pendragon]

OK, but you become like the X-Men's Gambit and transfer the energy to anything you touch turning it into a bomb.


I wish I could time travel...

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You are a time-machine.

I wish there was no a difference between coffee and tea.

[Madhuri]

Granted. Now tea and coffee have resulted in a hybrid drink that tastes :sick:

I wish I could be a master of all and jack of none...:D

[Pendragon]

You are now a master cylinder that fits all automobiles, but not a jack for any of them, since you were so not specific in your wish. :lol:

I wish I could type better and faster

[Shalot]

Granted -- you can type better and faster. Unfortunately it only lasts for a day because you lose all your finger tips in a deli meat slicing accident.

I wish I could quit my job and be a full-time student forever

[kathycf]

Granted, but you are stuck writing boring papers on the existential angst of slugs. For the rest of your life.

I wish I did not have this grey hair growing right on the front of my head. (that should be a productive wish to spoil) :D

[Shalot]

Granted -- instead the grey hair is growing from your hands, chin, and upper lip --- in abundance


I wish it was Saturday

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. It is Saturday--a cold and rainy, miserable Saturday, and everyone is in a bad mood, and you're locked out of your house without proper shoes.

I wish I had a gift with words.

[dumwitliteratur]

granted but your words are all screwed up.

I wish that my life wasn't so boring.

[kathycf]

Granted. Your life is so utterly exciting that your head explodes from it.

I wish I hadn't had that second slice of pizza....:sick:

[Riesa]

Granted! Instead you just ate an entire bag of pork rinds. :lol:

I wish it wasn't such a fight to get kids to eat veggies.

[kathycf]

Granted. It is still an epic battle to get them to bathe however. Hope you have a gasmask at home...


Granted! Instead you just ate an entire bag of pork rinds. :lol:


That is even worse! I have never eaten those but they look nasty. You are the queenbee of wish spoiling! :lol:

[Pendragon]

So now, Kathy. you are trapped on a dessert island with only pork rinds to eat!

I wish I understood the younger generations' ^'_'^

[kathycf]

Granted. Now that you understand them you realize that they are saying almost the same things as every other generation, just in new ways and you are bored to tears.

I wish I hadn't forgotten to make a wish in my last post....:blush: :lol:

[LPRox015]

Granted, you made a wish but guess what? Someone still ruined it! Haha!

I wish the world was a better place...

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. The world is wonderful and full of meaning and beauty and love and natural justice and caring, but everyone lives in a colony on the moon, and it's a terrible place.

I wish I had a 1964 Lincoln Continental with a 460ci engine, and suicide doors. (I may have made this wish before in this thread. Oh, well...spoil it again.)

[kathycf]

Granted. You are the proud owner of said vehicle but it is impossible to keep free of bird poop. People look at you funny when you drive by in a bird poop car. I sympathize, I once had a Volkswagen Rabbit that was also frequently poopy. Bird poop that is.

I wish I just hadn't written variations of the word "poop" several times just now...:blush: :lol:

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. "Granted. You are the proud owner of said vehicle but it is impossible to keep free of bird cosmetics. People look at you funny when you drive by in a bird cosmetics car. I sympathize, I once had a Volkswagen Rabbit that was also frequently cosmeticy. Bird cosmetics that is." Now you make very little sense.

I wish my coat were not falling apart at the seams.

[Pen&Ink]

Granted, but now it keeps out all the cold air, and you get too hot so you take off your jacket, forget it on the bus, and now you are left with no jacket.

I wish final exams were over. :D

[Pendragon]

Granted easily enough, but you did not ask to Pass them, so you failed them all! Oops! Careful what you wish for!:idea:


I wish I were as muscular as I am strong.

[Shalot]

Granted but you become this gym freak and you never have time for litnet and you neglect your writing talent and the world is deprived of your creations.

I wish violent criminals would just not --- I wish they would stay home and play video games instead.

[kathycf]

Granted, but the police force, FBI and other enforcement types get really bored and start playing video games as well. They all develop carpal tunnel syndrome, thanks to you. I sure hope you're happy now. :p

I wish I had not lost my temper earlier today.

[zanna]

Granted, but someone got mad at you, and ruined your day anyway.

I wish Contest wasn't so close! :eek:

[Pendragon]

Maybe it isn't. There could be several other perfectly reasonable explaintions for close scores...

I wish we know who won the Poetry Contest, so we could start a new one...

[Riesa]

Wish Granted!! Unfortunately, you didn't win. :(

I wish I could record my dreams.

[bluevictim]

Granted, but you have to figure out how to program your VCR.

I wish Coca-Cola was healthy.

[zanna]

Granted, but now steak isn't. (wait a minute . . .)

I wish I could find better clip art!

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. The entirety of Art is solely comprised of clip art.

I wish I had a motorcycle.

[bluevictim]

Granted, but it's not assembled.

I wish I had straight teeth.

[kathycf]

Granted, now your teeth are so straight they resemble that proverbial " white picket fence". Neighborhood kids nickname you ol' fence mouth.

I wish my feet were not so cold!

[bluevictim]

Granted. They're colder.

I wish I could go to the Moon.

[kathycf]

Granted. Too bad it is even colder than my feet there. That and the general lack of oxygen really put a damper on your good time.

I wish the moon really was made of cheese.

[bluevictim]

Granted, but the cold and lack of oxygen there means you can't eat any of it.

I wish there weren't any nuts in Rocky Road ice cream.

[kathycf]

Granted. The nuts have been replaced by all that green moon cheese. Oh...yum.:sick:

I wish I had a bowl of Rocky Road icecream!

[bluevictim]

Granted, but I picked out all of the nuts.

I wish I had a time machine.

[kathycf]

Granted. You have a time machine that delivers you into the far distant past of three and a half minutes ago. Yay. :p

I wish I did not bite my lip all the time.

[dramasnot6]

Granted, but now you are more embaressed with the habit of biting your shoe.

I wish I knew what my dog wanted when she stares at me for long periods of time

[RobinHood3000]

Granted - but it's not pretty.

I wish I could teleport to my girlfriend's house at will.

[Pendragon]

Granted. Then you'll find out who "Will" is, and you won't like it, no you won't! :lol:

I wish people wouldn't take me wrong...

[pandora]

i wish my final exams finished

[Jean-Baptiste]

I wish people wouldn't take me wrong...

Granted. Now everyone takes you as exactly right, and expects you to finish their final exams for them.


i wish my final exams finished

Granted. Pendragon has done them for you already, but he's often taken wrong, so you may not have done so well.

I wish I already knew everything about "Giovanni and his Bride".

[Shalot]

Granted you know everything about it but now that's all you know. You forget everything you previously knew in exchange for everthing about "Giovanni and his Bride" --- even your own name.

I wish I had another muffin pan

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. But that's all you have--another muffin pan, or should I say a different muffin pan, as the first one when the way of all the rest of your possessions. *Steal my knowledge, will you? :lol:*

I wish someone would invent a devise by which a person might talk to another person over a long span of distance, and that someone would use said devise to remind me of my name.

[kathycf]

Granted. I am using the device and I am reminding you that your name is Partridinanor Slumphaggle Hagensmith the II. Aren't you er, glad?

I wish my cat, although sweet, would stop laying on my arm when I am trying to type.

[Shalot]

Granted. I am using the device and I am reminding you that your name is Partridinanor Slumphaggle Hagensmith the II. Aren't you er, glad?

I wish my cat, although sweet, would stop laying on my arm when I am trying to type.

Granted --- now your cat is laying on the floor and she's not getting back up (ohhh that was harsh)


I wish I had slept a little more last night. 3 hours is not enough!!!

[The Bookinator]

granted, but you fell asleep at a party and your friends shaved every hair off of your body.

I wish I didn't have to go to school anymore... Pretty please, with orange pixie sticks on top?

[andave_ya]

granted, but because you got sick with some disease that didn't go away until you were too old for school (imaginative, hey? :idea: )

I wish I could spend the rest of my life in a library filled with all the books in the world.

[zanna]

granted, but you starve to death in three days, because there's nothing to eat. (trust me, we've thought of this, considering living in Powells).

I wish I could find that thing that allows a person to "talk to another person over a long span of distance," and actually have my friend on the other end. ooh, and we get to talk for a while.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. You get to talk on that thing for an amount of time sufficient for your friend to eat an entire JUMBO bag of corn chips, the process of which you can hear over the thing, and that's all you can hear.

I wish the kids hadn't been so mean to me on the playground, teasing me about my name.
Sincerely,
Partridinanor Slumphaggle Hagensmith the II

[kathycf]

Granted. The kids were adjusted to have been very nice and admiring of your name, and decided to adopt it for themselves, each one. This confuses you and now you need that device again, to remind you what your name was...

I wish I could sleep! :yawnb:

[Madhuri]

Granted. You get to sleep, but now, you have lost all your memory, and you too need the devise to remind you of everything you were.

Btw, whats your name Kathy?? :p

I wish Kathy knew her name was Kathy...:D

[kathycf]

Granted. That Kathy dame knows what her name is, but she is thinking she wants to change it to Madhuri.

I wish my name were Madhuri. :p

[LPRox015]

Granted, but now you wish your name were Kathy!

I wish my sisters weren't so annoying!

[The Bookinator]

granted. you now have brothers. (heh, heh, heh... cruel, aren't I?)

I wish that junk food was good for you.

[bluevictim]

Granted, but it no longer tastes good.

I wish I was the only one allowed to drive.

[kathycf]

Granted, but now you are expected to give everybody rides. Can you take me grocery shopping?

I wish I had less snarly hair.

[bluevictim]

Granted. Instead of snarling, it hisses.

I wish I could drive to Massachusetts in time to give kathycf a ride to the grocery store.

[kathycf]

Granted. However, driving to Massachusetts is tantamount to driving to the moon and you know...that is a long way.

I wish this popcorn didn't leave crumby stuff on my hands.

[bluevictim]

Granted. It leaves slimey stuff.

I wish I had a teleporter.

[kathycf]

Granted. The Teleporter works just fine, except for an odd glitch that makes you come out with the head of a fly and you just keep nattering something along the lines of "help, help me..."

Oops, I almost forgot my wish!
I wish I had a better memory for wishing!

[bluevictim]

Granted, but now you can't remember where you put your keys.

I wish people would be kinder to mutants who have the head of a fly.

[zanna]

granted, but only if you walk around saying, "I come in peace, please put down the flyswatter . . ."

I wish I didn't have a paper to write!

[kathycf]

*Edit* Granted, now you have twenty papers to write!

Granted. Everybody is extremely kind to fly headed mutants and this leads to jealousy and strife within the mutant community as a whole. "Why aren't they nicer to us" grumble the turnip headed mutants, and the seal headed mutants just stop talking to everybody in disgust. *sigh*

I wish I was faster posting in this thread! :lol:

[zanna]

Granted, but you end up ruining your own wish, you're so fast!

I wish the twenty papers I have to write were due in a month, not tomorrow! :eek:

[bluevictim]

EDIT (oops) zanna: Granted, but you have an exam tomorrow.

kathycf: Granted, but I get jealous and sic the turnip heads on you.

I wish airlines would use Disney characters as flight attendants.

[zanna]

heh, blue, sad thing is, I have three tomorrow. :sick:
and the Disney characters idea is cool, so granted, but bambi shies away from people, thumper causes turbulance, and Captain Hook causes all sorts of other problems! And he's really lousy at serving with only one hand. :D

I wish I had fewer finals tomorrow.

[bluevictim]

Granted. They were all yesterday, and you forgot to show up!

I wish there was less spam.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted, but now there's also less Monty Python's Flying Circus. That may be causing you to be doubly blessed; I don't know how much you like John Cleese and the gang.

I wish my friend would have more confidence with mathematics.

[kathycf]

Granted, your friend is extremely confident regarding mathematics and becomes in demand for speaking engagements and parties. You, however are now only in demand to swat flies. :(

I wish I was not so sleepy right now...

[zanna]

granted, but I get sleepy . . .zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

i wish for sweet dreams :)

[bluevictim]

Granted, but you get cavities.

I wish toner was cheap.

[Jean-Baptiste]

Granted. The cost of toner is now comparable to that of bulk pinto beans, but you can't buy it prepared in a cartridge, and that means Messy.

I wish I could express myself in coherent, well constructed sentences for an extended period of pages.

[bluevictim]

Granted, but you have no toner to print out the pages.

I wish I could live in Antarctica.

[kathycf]

Granted, but you have no central heating and your best friend is now a penguin with an annoying lisp.

I wish my house was warmer right now...

[Jean-Baptiste]

Your house is warmer right now than the average outdoor temperature in Antarctica.

I wish I could go to Antarctica, but just for a visit--not long enough to make friends with a lisping penguin.

[zanna]

granted, but the boat sinks on the way back, and you have to try to make it back to the station! :eek:

I wish for a good breakfast with my friends tomorrow.

[andave_ya]

Granted, but you stay up late tonight and don't get up until after lunch.:D

I wish I didn't have any homework to do this Saturday.

[kathycf]

Granted. Now if you didn't see this one coming from a mile away....;)

You don't have homework this Saturday, just every other one for the rest of the year. It could have been the rest of your life, count your blessings....:D

I wish I didn't have to cook dinner tonight.

[zanna]

Hahaha, andave, you don't know how right you are! But, no, I did drag myself out of bed in time to have a nice breakfast with my friend. I only got to see one, that was the not-as-cool part.

Kathy, granted, but the takeout you guys order instead gets you all sick! :sick:

I wish I didn't have to worry about scholarships.

[Captain Pike]

Okay, you get your wish: some rich guy sets up a special fund that generates its own interest and you can draw on it only by paying tuition and class related expenses.

The only thing is, you notice two dudes from the IRS trying to discreetly follow you around to find out if you enroll anywhere or by any pencils. Because now, you have to worry about paying taxes on the benefits you receive.

[The Bookinator]

I wish that I had my own computer so that I could stay on and answer my emails instead of being kicked off by siblings. Grr...

[zanna]

granted, but the internet on it is bad. Then we wouldn't get to see you. :(

I wish my friend wasn't sick with a cold! :cold: :( I hope she feels better.

[Shalot]

granted ---your friend is not sick with a cold. She has leukemia and needs a bone marrow transplant. A cold sounds like a walk in the park now doesn't it? Careful what you wish for -- muhahaha (that's supposed to be evil laughter...)


I wish that I could think of a wish that no one could ruin

[kathycf]

Granted, but now the evil genie who ruins wishes in this thread is very annoyed and is coming after you for a, um...a.."discussion". Yikes, I wouldn't want to be you when the EG catches up with you....:eek:

I wish today was Saturday again.

[seasong]

Granted, but your sunday privileges are revoked so Monday follows Saturday and it stinks just as much as Sunday does.

I wish I could fly.

[The Bookinator]

Granted, but you get struck by lightning when flying over to show your friends.

I wish the new Harry Potter book (Deathly Hallows= awesome new title) was out and i could read it...

[bluevictim]

Granted, but it's incomplete.

I wish my computer were faster.

[ktd222]

Sure, but then how would you ever catch it:lol:

I wish I could type with both hands as well as bite on my finger nails.

[bluevictim]

Granted, but you get an itch and now you can't scratch it.

I wish I could catch my computer.

[kathycf]

Granted, but now you spend your time trying to catch a break... Oh snap! :p

I wish it wasn't dark out already.

[bluevictim]

Granted, but you're now in California.

I wish there were more rainbows.

[AimusSage]

Granted, say hello to the endless rain, but atleast there is sunshine too.

I wish I could be more out there...

[bluevictim]

Granted. You just got evicted.

I wish there were less commercials on TV.

[Maria L]

Granted. But now you have absoulutely no idea of new products out in the market, and your shows that you use as an excuse to avoid homework now only last 15 minutes each.

I wish I was not brainwashed by media. Or should I say, imedia!

[kathycf]

Granted, now you are brainwashed by turnip eating eccentrics.

I wish my hand was not so cold!