, And Lady Meath
Under this stone lies Dick and Dolly. Doll dying first, Dick grew melancholy; For Dick without Doll thought living a folly.
Dick lost in Doll a wife tender and dear: But Dick lost by Doll twelve hundred a-year; A loss that Dick thought no mortal could bear.
Dick sigh'd for his Doll, and his mournful arms cross'd; Thought much of his Doll, and the jointure he lost; The first vex'd him much, the other vex'd most.
Thus loaded with grief, Dick sigh'd and he cried: To live without both full three days he tried; But liked neither loss, and so quietly died.
Dick left a pattern few will copy after: Then, reader, pray shed some tears of salt water; For so sad a tale is no subject of laughter. Meath smiles for the jointure, though gotten so late; The son laughs, that got the hard-gotten estate; And Cuffe grins, for getting the Alicant plate.
Here quiet they lie, in hopes to rise one day, Both solemnly put in this hole on a Sunday, And here rest----sic transit gloria mundi!
[Footnote 1: Of Kilbrue, in the county of Meath.--F.]
[Footnote 2: Dorothy, dowager of Edward, Earl of Meath. She was married to the general in 1716, and died 10th April, 1728. Her husband survived her but two days.--F.
The Dolly of this epitaph is the same lady whom Swift satirized in his "Conference between Sir Harry Pierce's Chariot and Mrs. Dorothy Stopford's Chair." See ante, p.85.--W. E. B.]
[Footnote 3: John Cuffe, of Desart, Esq., married the general's eldest daughter.--F.]
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