Lets make a story game!

[Pompey Bum]

librarian, whose modest

[free]

interference with crowded

[Pompey Bum]

seaside villas induced

[bounty]

mass hallucinations from

[Pompey Bum]

witch-burning peasants.

[Pendragon]

Putin paused, dramatically.

[Pompey Bum]

Love filled his

[bounty]

grinch sized heart

[Pompey Bum]

and liver. Lizaveta

[Calidore]

couldn't believe that

[Pompey Bum]

the modest librarian

[Pendragon]

had said that

[Pompey Bum]

she longed for

[bounty]

ice cream and

[Pompey Bum]

bacon. Putin gladly

[bounty]

put this fiasco

[Pompey Bum]

in terms that

[Francis Meadows]

sounded like bells

[Pompey Bum]

ringing tunelessly over

[Pendragon]

light dance music.

[Francis Meadows]

The clatter of

[Pompey Bum]

chattering teeth pattered

[bounty]

endlessly in their

[Pompey Bum]

splattering manner. Lizaveta

[Pendragon]

secretly hated that.

[bounty]

nor did she

[Pompey Bum]

much care for

[Pendragon]

pomp and circumstance

[bounty]

playing at the

[Pompey Bum]

graduation of her

[Pendragon]

friend from university

[bounty]

who failed miserably

[Pendragon]

to accomplish anything

[bounty]

given that she

[Calidore]

was mostly inclined

[bounty]

to spend her

[Pendragon]

wealth very frivolously.

[bounty]

that all said,

[Pompey Bum]

Putin loved her.

[bounty]

and that love

[Pendragon]

made no sense

[Pompey Bum]

to any but

[bounty]

those who religiously

[Pompey Bum]

monitored the happy

[bounty]

state of affairs

[Pompey Bum]

in far-flung

[bounty]

galaxies, the empire

[Pendragon]

slumbered in somnolent

[bounty]

complacency considering the

[Pendragon]

indifferent indolence of

[bounty]

the rebel's rebellion.

[Pompey Bum]

A weary Lizaveta

[bounty]

and princess leia

[Pendragon]

vowed vengeance against

[Pompey Bum]

Gandhi's concept of

[bounty]

intergalactic commerce and

[Pompey Bum]

French kissing. Piranhas

[Pendragon]

surfaced, snapping teeth

[Pompey Bum]

kept merry rhythm

[bounty]

in time with

[Pendragon]

her horrified heartbeat.

[Pompey Bum]

Suddenly glistening tentacles

[Pendragon]

erupted from underground,

[Calidore]

and reached for

[bounty]

our heroines' bodices

[Pompey Bum]

and our heroes'

[bounty]

shiny metallic codpieces.

[Pompey Bum]

Shiny metallic cods

[bounty]

lovingly created by

[Pompey Bum]

Disney Studios. Lizaveta

[bounty]

in conjunction with

[Pompey Bum]

her lawyers, demanded

[bounty]

royalties from all

[Pendragon]

unsolicited memoirs that

[bounty]

identified numerous accomplices

[Pompey Bum]

in her nefarious

[bounty]

plot to overthrow

[Pendragon]

the temperamental Queen.

[bounty]

meanwhile, back at

[Pompey Bum]

the Casa Antarctica

[bounty]

the cold was

[Pompey Bum]

delightfully refreshing! Lizaveta

[Pendragon]

watched her breath

[bounty]

and counted her

[Pompey Bum]

remaining toes. Suddenly

[bounty]

to nobody's surprise,

[Pompey Bum]

Putin phoned. "Pussycat?"

[Calidore]

"Meow," she answered.

[Pendragon]

Putin positively purred.

[bounty]

lizaveta positively purred.

[Pompey Bum]

[Heh heh--great minds!]

"You dog!" she

[Pendragon]

said, lasciviously, panting

[Calidore]

and licking her

[Pendragon]

lips, contemplating romance.

[bounty]

"when can you...

[Pompey Bum]

unleash your feelings

[bounty]

my little KGB

[Pompey Bum]

infiltrator!" Unfortunately Lizaveta's

[bounty]

cell phone went

[Pompey Bum]

off--or maybe

[bounty]

sinister forces were

[Pompey Bum]

delightfully tickling her

[bounty]

especially sensitive unmentionables. (no disrespect to lizaveta intended!)

[Pompey Bum]

Suddenly Putin's voice

[bounty]

reverberated throughout the

[Pompey Bum]

universe: "I CAN

[Pendragon]

Do what i

[bounty]

wanna and no

[North Star]

body will care,

[bounty]

so I am

[Pompey Bum]

changing my name

[bounty]

to something that

[North Star]

people will not

[Pendragon]

like! So there!

[Calidore]

Meanwhile, back at

[Pompey Bum]

the situation room

[Pendragon]

they lost control

[Pompey Bum]

over feelings for

[bounty]

Lizaveta's torn bodice.

[Pendragon]

Averting his eyes

[bounty]

yet nevertheless extending

[Pompey Bum]

his dripping tentacles

[bounty]

our chivalrous octopus

[Pompey Bum]

restored manners with

[bounty]

just enough panache

[Pompey Bum]

to win her

[bounty]

undying affection. meanwhile,

[Pompey Bum]

back on Moscow

[Pendragon]

TV, Putin stated

[bounty]

"this accursed octopus

[Pompey Bum]

must be stopped!"

[North Star]

and the audience

[Pompey Bum]

murmured zombie-like assent.

[bounty]

an astonished lizaveta

[Pompey Bum]

fended off KGB

[bounty]

thugs bent on

[Pompey Bum]

painting her toenails

[bounty]

and refurbishing her

[Pompey Bum]

vodka. Putin waited

[bounty]

while the spectators

[Pompey Bum]

assembled in the

[bounty]

frosty Russian air.

[Pendragon]

"Friends! Comrades! Russians!"

[Pompey Bum]

"I give you... LIZAVETA!"

[bounty]

the crowd thunderously

[Pompey Bum]

broke wind. Lizaveta

[Pendragon]

tooted loudest, giggling.

[bounty]

the peasants, dumbfounded

[Pompey Bum]

plotted revolution. Putin

[bounty]

consulted with his

[Pompey Bum]

demonic familiar, a

[Pendragon]

horned red frog

[bounty]

from west texas.

[Pendragon]

The frog spoke

[Pompey Bum]

: "Our octopus enemy

[Pendragon]

of many tentacles,

[Pompey Bum]

hides in her

[Pendragon]

Cthulhu temple, plotting

[Pompey Bum]

blueprints for another

[Pendragon]

R'lyeh to dream

[Pike Bishop]

of rapacious moons

[Pendragon]

when stars align

[Pompey Bum]

within your mind

[Pendragon]

Old Ones return.

[Pike Bishop]

Yogg-Soggoth sighs shibboleths

[Pendragon]

being the gate

[Pompey Bum]

of the beautiful

[Pendragon]

portal of existence

[Pompey Bum]

Suddenly Chivalrous Octopus

[Pendragon]

raised blue-ringed tentacle

[bounty]

back towards lizaveta's

[Pompey Bum]

.38. Putin eyed

[bounty]

the weapon with

[Pendragon]

disgust. "No Russian

[Pompey Bum]

roulette tonight my

[Pendragon]

little Babushka. However;

[bounty]

the thought of

[Pompey Bum]

cheap Ukrainian vodka

[bounty]

and beet borscht

[Pompey Bum]

makes me drool!"

[Pendragon]

"My gun's loaded

[Pompey Bum]

," cried the octopus

[Pendragon]

and inked everyone!

[Pompey Bum]

"This way, Lizaveta!"

[bounty]

A familiar voice

[Pompey Bum]

of eight armed

[bounty]

to the suckers

(I was struggling with that one!)

[Pompey Bum]

cried. Lisaveta covered

[Pendragon]

her face, but

[Pompey Bum]

took Octy's hand(s).

[bounty]

the crowd surged

[Pompey Bum]

as Putin cried

[Pendragon]

Don't do it!

[Pompey Bum]

Lizaveta grabbed the

[Pendragon]

blue ringed tentacle

[bounty]

and lovingly suggested

[Pompey Bum]

they scram. Lizaveta

[bounty]

whistled for a

[Pompey Bum]

their helicopter, which

[Pendragon]

hovered just above.

[bounty]

meanwhile imperial forces

[Pompey Bum]

charged. A rope

[Pendragon]

like blue-ringed tentacle

[Pompey Bum]

lifted Lizaveta toward

[bounty]

the waiting helicopter.

[Pompey Bum]

Suddenly a shot

[Pendragon]

struck the tentacle,




[Lizaveta should definitely be dead by now. The Blue Ringed Octopus is deadly poisonous!]

[Pompey Bum]

"Noooooooooooo!," cried Lizaveta

[bounty]

as she fell

[Pompey Bum]

into the helicopter.

[Pendragon]

I'm too young

[Pompey Bum]

for girls!" Putin

[Pendragon]

snarled. Women are

[Pompey Bum]

scary!" But Lizaveta

[bounty]

adjusted her bodice

[Pompey Bum]

. Octy, shot, gasped,

[bounty]

"if only we...

[Pompey Bum]

had met, love,

[Pendragon]

before I poisoned

[Pompey Bum]

my mind with

[bounty]

harlequin romance literature!"

[Pompey Bum]

His dead tentacles

[Pendragon]

twitched slightly. Was

[bounty]

there anything left

[Pompey Bum]

beyond the grave?

[Pendragon]

Suddenly, it happened!

[Pompey Bum]

Lizaveta teleported to

[bounty]

the starship enterprise,

[Pendragon]

Captain Kirk, pleased,

[Pompey Bum]

aimed photon torpedoes

[bounty]

at KGB headquarters.

[Pompey Bum]

But Ensign Chekov

[bounty]

demurred. "Keptin! I..."

[Pompey Bum]

Suddenly Putin decloaked!

[Pendragon]

Everyone gasped and

[bounty]

wondered how the

[Pompey Bum]

Russian Starship had

[Pendragon]

been concealed behind

[bounty]

the earth's moon.

[Pendragon]

"Damn the torpedoes!

[bounty]

sulu, new course

[Pompey Bum]

to Lizaveta's heart!"

[Pendragon]

"But I'm Gay",

[bounty]

sulu blurted out.

[Pompey Bum]

"I'M NOT!" cried

[Pendragon]

Lizaveta, "But Sulu

[Pompey Bum]

's standing beside

[Pendragon]

me and he

[Pompey Bum]

keeps laughing," whispered

[Pendragon]

Lizaveta. "Why? What