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Thread: Top Tips for a Happy Life

  1. #421
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    Tip #738: Don't skip ahead to the parts that you think are more important. There might be a lot of worthwhile stuff you miss inbetween
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  2. #422
    Registered User PoeticPassions's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paulclem View Post
    I will. What's the charge these days?

    Tip 249: When you find yourself in any situation repeating the same story to the same people, don't give that tired afterthought response of "Have I told you this before?" and continue regardless. Just stop straight away. Take yourself off to a quiet corner and have a jolly good word with yourself. You say very firmly, " I will not become one of those bores that tells, without any apparent self consciousness, the same old stories again and again. Reinforce it if you will, with good hard slaps to the face - if you are practiced in giving them to yourself. (They can go wrong if you are a novice - a bit lke those people who horribly maim themselves when trying to commit suicide shooting themselves in the head). Thus chastened, you can then return to normal society, sure in the knowledge that your boringness has not grown today, but, if anyone caught you slapping yourself, your interestingness has.

    I haven't put this already have I?....slap slap...
    The charge? Well, depends. I'm all about fairness, so the charge is anything you can give at a given moment. Could be nothing

    and good tip... being boring is the worst. More so than being bored. I think I repeat myself quite often, but I also try to act erratically to keep people on their toes.
    "All gods are homemade, and it is we who pull their strings, and so, give them the power to pull ours." -Aldous Huxley

    "Sooner murder an infant in its cradle than nurse unacted desires." -William Blake

  3. #423
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PoeticPassions View Post
    The charge? Well, depends. I'm all about fairness, so the charge is anything you can give at a given moment. Could be nothing

    and good tip... being boring is the worst. More so than being bored. I think I repeat myself quite often, but I also try to act erratically to keep people on their toes.
    Super. I'll send you a list of divinations.

    You should put your erratic point as the next tip. Keeping people on their toes is good.

  4. #424
    Registered User PoeticPassions's Avatar
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    Tip #252: (as per Paulclem's suggestion) Keep people on their toes by acting erratically. Mix things up. And stay interesting, and thus interested.
    "All gods are homemade, and it is we who pull their strings, and so, give them the power to pull ours." -Aldous Huxley

    "Sooner murder an infant in its cradle than nurse unacted desires." -William Blake

  5. #425
    Tip 253 - Don't eat too much in one go.

    It can make you feel sick.

  6. #426
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Neely View Post
    Tip 253 - Don't eat too much in one go.

    It can make you feel sick.
    Yours made me think of this important one:

    Tip 254: Be a good vomiter. Bad vomiters allow the convulsion of the stomach to get the better of them with a chaotic spray effect. Good vomiters are accurate and calm. Be a good vomiter. It's much less cleaning after.

  7. #427
    www.markbastable.co.uk
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paulclem View Post
    Yours made me think of this important one:

    Tip 254: Be a good vomiter. Bad vomiters allow the convulsion of the stomach to get the better of them with a chaotic spray effect. Good vomiters are accurate and calm. Be a good vomiter. It's much less cleaning after.
    Nah - just don't vomit. Don't do things that might lead to vomiting. Certainly don't learn to do it well.

    I drink quite a bit - I can easily put away three bottles of wine in an evening. But I have never in my life thrown up because of drinking. Or eating. Or for any reason but illness. I hate it. Actually, I have a bit of a phobia about it. So - after years of experience - I can tell you that it is possible to lead a full, active, gluttonous life without vomiting at all. So why would you accept that you must?

  8. #428
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarkBastable View Post
    Nah - just don't vomit. Don't do things that might lead to vomiting. Certainly don't learn to do it well.

    I drink quite a bit - I can easily put away three bottles of wine in an evening. But I have never in my life thrown up because of drinking. Or eating. Or for any reason but illness. I hate it. Actually, I have a bit of a phobia about it. So - after years of experience - I can tell you that it possible to lead a full, active, gluttonous life without vomiting at all. So why would you accept that you must?
    There have been times when I have had to. Also, my brothers and I are able to make ourselves vomit fairly easily. This is useful if you realise that you really shouldn't have eaten that. Practice makes for a good vomiter.

  9. #429
    www.markbastable.co.uk
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paulclem View Post
    ... my brothers and I are able to make ourselves vomit fairly easily. This is useful if you realise that you really shouldn't have eaten that. Practice makes for a good vomiter.
    Dude, none of that is anything to be proud of. It would be much better for all involved to practice not eating stuff you shouldn't.

  10. #430
    All are at the crossroads qimissung's Avatar
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    Lol, not to be insulting, Paul, but isn't that what dogs do? Eat whatever they encounter, then throw it up?
    "The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its' own reason for existing." ~ Albert Einstein
    "Remember, no matter where you go, there you are." Buckaroo Bonzai
    "Some people say I done alright for a girl." Melanie Safka

  11. #431
    Pièce de Résistance Scheherazade's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paulclem View Post
    There have been times when I have had to. Also, my brothers and I are able to make ourselves vomit fairly easily. This is useful if you realise that you really shouldn't have eaten that. Practice makes for a good vomiter.
    Hope this is not something like bulimia...
    ~
    "It is not that I am mad; it is only that my head is different from yours.”
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  12. #432
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
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    Vomiting is rare for me. I just like to be prepared.

  13. #433
    All are at the crossroads qimissung's Avatar
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    A little over-prepared, more like.
    "The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its' own reason for existing." ~ Albert Einstein
    "Remember, no matter where you go, there you are." Buckaroo Bonzai
    "Some people say I done alright for a girl." Melanie Safka

  14. #434
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    Plunging the depths still further:-


    Tip 255. When approaching the toilet suffering from sickness and diarrhoea, get your priorities right.

  15. #435
    Oh, oh dear lord!!

    Tip 256 - Gentlemen in polite society should never descend to converse on the vulgar.

    There may be ladies present.

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