Korova Milkbar (no girls allowed)

is there a woman who has never wished to be a man in urinating situations in particularly nasty places? :P

mmm limoncello...where? :D

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Originally Posted by Koa

mmm limoncello...where? :D

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Koa, I was referring to my poem I posted, titled, "limoncello." If you haven't read it, you can check it out here:http://www.online-literature.com/for...ght=limoncello
Let me know what you think. And it is nice to drink. I think I'll go get a little glass right now.

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Originally Posted by Koa

is there a woman who has never wished to be a man in urinating situations in particularly nasty places? :P

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It is certainly convenient to be a man when you're in the woods. However, some public women's restrooms are downright luxurious. When I was an undergrad, I knew someone who would take her exams in the restroom in the engineering building. I don't blame her, either. The women's restroom had a room with couches, sofas, mirrors, and tables seperate from the room where the stalls were. It was like a women-only private lounge.

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Originally Posted by bluevictim

It is certainly convenient to be a man when you're in the woods. However, some public women's restrooms are downright luxurious. When I was an undergrad, I knew someone who would take her exams in the restroom in the engineering building. I don't blame her, either. The women's restroom had a room with couches, sofas, mirrors, and tables seperate from the room where the stalls were. It was like a women-only private lounge.

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Good point Blue. I had to close my building at work once and had to check that all the windows were closed. After knocking on the women's room door to make sure no one was there, I entered and was shocked to find couches and tables. And it seemed so much cleaner than a men's room. Not only do we get nothing but we're a bunch of slobs.;)

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Originally Posted by Virgil

And it seemed so much cleaner than a men's room. Not only do we get nothing but we're a bunch of slobs.;)

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... and don't get me started on the public humiliation that I suppose few women will ever face: the trough.

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Originally Posted by bluevictim

... and don't get me started on the public humiliation that I suppose few women will ever face: the trough.

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Do you live in England, Blue? I found those things quite common there. For the most part, rare in the US.

Yes, it's rare in the US (I've only encountered it at ballparks), but still all too common!

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Originally Posted by Virgil

Thanks Arethusa. I don't think I've seen you around recently. You still remember about the Limoncello! :) Have you tried it yet?

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I've been lurking but really busy. The novel got finished and I found a small agency to take it after only the eighth rejection letter! I didn't think of it but it would have been a cool idea to celebrate with limoncello. Since it was unexpected and no one had a chance to get to Trader Joe's, I think we celebrated with Ripple...or Night Train...or cooking sherry...or something equally ghetto. If it actually gets picked up by a publisher, I'd like to say I had my first glass on the beach in Naples or Brindi or maybe even toasting the Great One's tomb! Did you ever get to read Horace's Trek to Brundisium?

By the way, we need couches in our restrooms. By the time we finally get to one, we're so exhausted and light headed from holding it in for so long, a little nap is needed in order to regain our equilibrium. Everyone knows that a woman cannot go outside unless the proper conditions are present. There must be a bush of the proper height to width ratio, traffic and weather conditions must be optimal, and the proper downhill grade is a must, especially if we're wearing our strappy shoes. Most important of all, there must be something at hand that's more absorbant than a Big Mac wrapper, preferably something two-ply. However, your handkerchief will do in a pinch.

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Originally Posted by Arethusa

I've been lurking but really busy. The novel got finished and I found a small agency to take it after only the eighth rejection letter! I didn't think of it but it would have been a cool idea to celebrate with limoncello. Since it was unexpected and no one had a chance to get to Trader Joe's, I think we celebrated with Ripple...or Night Train...or cooking sherry...or something equally ghetto. If it actually gets picked up by a publisher, I'd like to say I had my first glass on the beach in Naples or Brindi or maybe even toasting the Great One's tomb! Did you ever get to read Horace's Trek to Brundisium?

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No, I haven't come across it in a book store. And my reading list is very long as it is. I will get to it one day.

Congratulations on your book. When it gets published please let us know here at lit net. We might actually go out and buy up all the editions.

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Originally Posted by Nightshade

well I guess it makes a wierd kind of sense...
wait the stall you mmean mens toilets only have one stall ...........
:eek2:

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A good many only have one, the one they are required by law to have for handicapped access. I guess they think that they have to have that one, and if it is occupied, you can wait! Some have two, the aforementioned and a regular one. But you won't see five guys at that wall of urinals unless something very drastic happens, and then they will appear to all be fascinated by the small square of paint in front of their nose. Zombies would show more life. No one dares look around. :lol:

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Originally Posted by Pendragon

Don't know who came up with THIS Man Law: 18: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e. both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other situations, an almost imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

But as all true men know, it violates male bathroom etiquette. To explain, let's take the following scenario: We have a typical public Loo, which has 5 urinals along the wall. Man A enters to find an empty Loo. He will invariably choose either urinal 1 or 5, probably 5 as it is furtherest from the door. Man B comes in, sees man A, and goes to urinal 1. No thinking required, he wants as much space as possible between him and man A. Man C enters, sees the other two, and freezes, but goes to urinal 3. At least he has a buffer zone of a urinal on each side. Man D enters, and if the stall isn't occupied, that is where he is headed! If there's someone in the stall, he will exit, and go out behind the building if necessary. You men are all nodding while the ladies think I'm crazy. :D

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My husband tells me that proper etiquette is to leave one stall between you and someone else when taking a dump as well.

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Originally Posted by Shalot

My husband tells me that proper etiquette is to leave one stall between you and someone else when taking a dump as well.

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Proper yes, but completely unworkable: I am unaware of any public washroom that has more than 2 stalls.

This discussion reminds me of when I used to work as the "maintenance man" at MacDonald's. The urinals had an auto-rinse part, so every 1/2 hour water would rinse them clean. Some bright spark decided to block the drain holes with straws, as a result the urinal would overflow. Apparently this came under my job description, so I spent the day removing straws and other "junk" from the U-bend. The funny thing is that was not the worst thing I had to do during my time working there

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Originally Posted by Vada Dagon

OK. I officially love this Forum now. Anyway. To answer your question. You are right. I lived with my mother since the age of eleven and from before that I can tell you what I learned from my dad.

(True Story)
Picture an eleven year old walking down the beach with his father. The father clears his throat and the son looks up at his father. Without looking at this son the father proceeds into a one way conversation with his son. "Son you are old enough now to hear this". The son now is intrigued and continues to look at his father with interest who keeps avoiding his gaze. "You are old enough to get girls pregnant now, or soon. Aheem. So, don't." The son is now perplexed as to the meaning of the conversation? Unable to even formulate a word the son continues to stare at his father in confusion. The father now stops and turns to his son and continues "But if you do! Make sure they don't know where you live".
"What?" is all the son can manage to respond. So the father continues walking down the beach and the son rushes to catch up. His father a few more steps and then adds "That's all you need to know about sex". It then dawn on the son that this was suppose to be the talk on the Bird and the Bees. The facts of life were summarized into one sentence and a fragment.

So everything I learned about sex, girls, and everything else came from all my older friends. Male friends of course, but that is not to say that I was not influenced by being raised by a single mother. I see the world differently than most American males and yet still love women. Do I sometimes display my machismo in ways that women do not understand? Sure, I do. However, that didn't stop me from feeling I had missed out on something in my life.

Because of that when I was 18 I decided that I needed a right of passage because I lacked a father. My choice of right of passage was to carve a cross on my left arm with a razor blade. The Girls in the group would probably find that silly and attrocious at the same time.

So where's the Guiness? I want a pint and a Medium Rare Stake with fries please.

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I'm sure we can all relate to your story Mr Dagon, I can remember when my mother first spoke to me about sex, she was red in the face, shame she really tried to be a mom and a dad to me.
I am really looking forward to be a dad myself one day, I can wait to do the stuff with my son(or daughter) that I missed out on.It blows my mind!

OZEED, I shall be merciless when I eventually have kids. :) I will do the same to them as my parents did (and still do) to me, and embarrass them because it's fun to see 'em squirm. :lol:

Sorry Ozeed, I'm a sistah, not a brother, the avi's a pic of my boyfriend Prometheus sunbathing under a tree full of buzzards. I just dressed up as a waiter at the last meeting and stole the minutes.[/QUOTE]

In that case, I beg a thousand pardons dear lady.
I did think that it was a bit brave that a guys has a picture of a naked guy as his avy.:lol:

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Originally Posted by OZEED

In that case, I beg a thousand pardons dear lady.
I did think that it was a bit brave that a guys has a picture of a naked guy as his avy.:lol:

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No problem, happens all the time. I was lying on my back once and my husband mistook me for my brother. :lol:

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Originally Posted by bluevictim

... and don't get me started on the public humiliation that I suppose few women will ever face: the trough.

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a what???


:confused:

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Originally Posted by Nightshade

a what???


:confused:

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I wondered about that too, Nightshade. Maybe he means the salad bar :p

Still don't get it...

A trough is a big communal toilet that men urinate into at the same time. It seems to be common in English men's rooms. We can do that standing up.

Quick story. When I was in London a few years ago, and I was at a pub, I had to go to the bathroom. I walked in and didn't see a urinal. But there was this wall that ran water down slowly and emptied into a gutter-like trough. It looked sort of strange to me so I decided I would just use a stall toilet. As I started walking towards it, another fellow walked in, a Londoner. I asked him why that wall was dripping water. I guess he heard my American accent, and said, "You must be a bloody Yank. This is how we pee over here. Come up against the wall and i'll show you." So we both peed up against the water dripping wall. :lol: Nice fellow, but I kind of like a little privacy when I pass bodily functions.

Okay.... that is disgusting.. I mean, urinals are bad enough guys... In our school, you can SMELL the difference between the bathrooms.. Even if you're 5 meters away from the closed bathroom... I wonder why men have a bad habit of bot flushing... Anyone care to enlighten me?

'cause they're guys . . . ?

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Originally Posted by shinigami

Okay.... that is disgusting.. I mean, urinals are bad enough guys... In our school, you can SMELL the difference between the bathrooms.. Even if you're 5 meters away from the closed bathroom... I wonder why men have a bad habit of bot flushing... Anyone care to enlighten me?

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Well, I know we're not as fastidious, but that smell at your school is not typical. We're not that bad. It must be the particular guys at your school.

Ever been in a women's public "toilet" in China? You have to hover, squat, balance and let go all at the same time. Gives a whole new meaning to multi-tasking.

A truely charming topic guys :rolleyes:
Yes, another girl has invaded your thread :lol: though some people seem to assume I'm male even though I've stated that I'm female in my profile. It must be the dragon. Anyway.
All of you girls here that long to urinate like a man, listen up.
Via a television program on the BBC, by the name of Dragon's Den (series 1) has seen the revolutionary new urinating gadget for women. At theh end of Dragon's Den series 2, inventions of te previous year were reviewed, to see how far they'd got.
This little item, konwn as the She wee I believe, or something similar to that, allows women to urinate standing up, and is sold on the net.
So ladies, now you know. Another thing that men take pride in can be achieved by us too. Hooray! :lol:

Hey, double posting. That's rare for me :D
Hey, guys, would you ever consider changing your name to
The Powerful Men Society?
I'd have suggested it for you sooner, but I was busy with other things.

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Originally Posted by shinigami

Okay.... that is disgusting.. I mean, urinals are bad enough guys... In our school, you can SMELL the difference between the bathrooms.. Even if you're 5 meters away from the closed bathroom... I wonder why men have a bad habit of bot flushing... Anyone care to enlighten me?

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I know, I am always after my teenage sons for not flushing. But maybe you can tell me, (I worked as a part-time janitor through high-school), why girls toss tampons up and stick them to the ceiling where the janitor has to scrape them off? I'm not lying about this at all. And worse, but I don't wish to make anyone sick. And Virgil, that trough is something I refuse to use unless I am the only one in the restroom! :) :D

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Originally Posted by Bluebiird

Hey, double posting. That's rare for me :D
Hey, guys, would you ever consider changing your name to
The Powerful Men Society?
I'd have suggested it for you sooner, but I was busy with other things.

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They can also prefix 'Supposedly' to -- Powerful Men Society :p :lol:

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Originally Posted by Pendragon

I know, I am always after my teenage sons for not flushing. But maybe you can tell me, (I worked as a part-time janitor through high-school), why girls toss tampons up and stick them to the ceiling where the janitor has to scrape them off? I'm not lying about this at all. And worse, but I don't wish to make anyone sick. And Virgil, that trough is something I refuse to use unless I am the only one in the restroom! :) :D

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Must have been the boys sneaking in to play a prank. Us delicate little flowers would never do something so vile.

*scratches, swigs beer, belches* :D

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Originally Posted by Pendragon

And Virgil, that trough is something I refuse to use unless I am the only one in the restroom! :) :D

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I know. Me too. :sick:

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Originally Posted by Arethusa

Ever been in a women's public "toilet" in China? You have to hover, squat, balance and let go all at the same time. Gives a whole new meaning to multi-tasking.

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I like to think of it this way.... at least your not sitting on somthing that you dont know how long it been since it was cleaned:sick:

I hate it when the urinals are not spaced well...like in cheap theatres where thers is about 15 urinals to a 16 foot stretch of wall...and the bull sticks out like a good foot from the wall...its like peeing naked in the middle of a room...and then at a theatre some guy always brings is young daughter in to use the facilities...there should be a law against that!

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Originally Posted by Nightshade

I like to think of it this way.... at least your not sitting on somthing that you dont know how long it been since it was cleaned:sick:

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True, they're definately one up on us in the hygiene department. My problem was more of a, oh please, I can't even walk and chew gum at the same time, issue.

Hmm... The talk in the Boys thread has found itself to the 'toilet', has it?

I will take the shoes and low calory food talk over this on any day!

:D

Gentlemen, in an effort to show our feminine side and to prove that we can look good while reading Oscar Wilde we will be taking questions relating to appropriate dress codes and general style question.
Can we drink to that?

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Originally Posted by Scheherazade

Hmm... The talk in the Boys thread has found itself to the 'toilet', has it?

I will take the shoes and low calory food talk over this on any day!

:D

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At least we're not talking about "riding the crimson wave". :D

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Originally Posted by OZEED

Gentlemen, in an effort to show our feminine side and to prove that we can look good while reading Oscar Wilde we will be taking questions relating to appropreate dress codes and general style question.
Can we drink to that?

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Sure. I'll drink to that. I'll drink to anything. :)

Awww, the boys wanna show their feminine side? How sweet!

I'm curious now...how fool-proof is the "pick up girls by getting caught reading literature in public" scheme?

Actually, it's a real good way to pick up girls... But I want to know, what is man's vision of "improper attire" and of course give the situation...

Like, I wouldn't wear 3/4 pants with leather shoes anyday or I wouldn't wear a tubetop anyway NEAR school [and in it of course]...

Guys, may I have a say? Ahem...

I despise those leather slipper shoes! You know, the ones with no laces, they just slip on? How lazy are you? lol, sorry, had to get that out. A friend of mine wears them everyday and I think they look so silly...like he is perpetually picking up his newspaper from off of the driveway, lmao.

Mind you, they are okay around the house...but you have no chance in hell of getting my number if you are wearing them outside :lol:

Proper attire, eh? As I have said elsewhere, I'm the type that would probably look sloppy in a tailor-made suit! Seriously, though, I like to wear Western styled shirts (though I must get them in the "Big and Tall" section of the shop, because I was raised to always keep my shirt tucked into my pants. I wear Dockers and comfortable shoes with socks that match the pants. I wear what they call "comfort fit" pants. They call them this because they have elastic in the side that enable them to stretch just a bit. It's better than calling them "Pants for the man who is too vain to admit he needs a larger size!" As Dave Barry said about Dockers: "They are called that because it isn't polite to say 'Pants for the bigger-butted man!'":lol:

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Originally Posted by Pendragon

I was raised to always keep my shirt tucked into my pants.

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I wear it that way too. I can't stand the sloopy look that is popular these days, not tucking in shirts and pants that have a crotch down to mid thighs. Uggghhh. And I would never wear baggy pants, even in jeans. And absolutely never low wearing pants that expose your backside. How deplorabale. :sick: