Lucky you...I really think research should set aside worrying about all those little things like heart trouble and cancer :yikes: and figure out how to isolate the bald gene...particularly for women:smilielol5:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
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Lucky you...I really think research should set aside worrying about all those little things like heart trouble and cancer :yikes: and figure out how to isolate the bald gene...particularly for women:smilielol5:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
I have hair, but not much of a face......:DQuote:
Originally Posted by soundofmusic
Incidentally my face strimmer -beard trimmer etc - broke down and I was contemplating getting another one. I said to my wife:
"...Or I could just shave off the tache and beard."
To which she replied:
"But then it would be obvious that you've got no chin."
So I got a new face strimmer...:D
:frown2:And What may I ask is Wrong with being Bald? :frown2:
Good god! We're clone couples!Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
When I shaved it all off for charity, it was suggested I use a paper bag until the beard grew back. I always keep my old beard trimmer as a back up.
Nothing.Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
If you're a frog.
:D
:lol:Quote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
We've been married 19 years. I wonder what else she hasn't told me...
I do remember my friend was talking to my wife a few months ago. He's a bit up and down, and thinks that I'm always happy - which I am mainly.
He asked my wife what my secret was and she replied that I was simple. :D
Perhaps I should stick to not knowing what she hasn't told me...
:lol:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
Classic!
It's things like that which remind you why you got married.
:frown2:And What, may I ask, is Wrong with having no Chin?:frown2:
or being simple?
or being overweight?
with anti socail habits?
I'm depressed now!
I'll get Parker to bring you a double
Hmmm. Do all men have these habits that are then villified by their other halves?Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
A kinship in vilification. The brotherhood of the despised. I'll have a double too please Parker. Parker... are you married too?
I see. Better get yourself one as well. :cheers2:
There are certain male apendeges that need to be manually "arranged" from time to time, not to say scratched. Women don't seem to understand this.:confused:
Billiards anyone?
Parker isn't, and has never been, married.Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
Why do you think he has that permanent smile?
Oddly, Mrs Atheist and I don't have those problems. She's learnt to leave the seat up and never move the beer.
Damn.Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
I was hoping women would understand that. I'm setting up a brassiere fitting service next week.
:brow:I think I saw a picture of a caned buttocks on you-tube; Paul, was that Mick :idea:Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
Why do our mates only seem to notice that we haven't chins or waist lines after their names are on all of our property:nonod:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
By the way, Paul, Kenneth Branagh became a sex symbol with no chin or lips...there's still hope for you man:hurray:
Nothing really, some men are very sexy when they're bald...Telly Savalous and Atheist does a good baldQuote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
Oh yes, I forgot, Kermit from the muppets is really sexy too:pQuote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
Do you think she meant that you appreciate the simple pleasures:skep:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
God, I just found my soul mate on the Blokes thread:rofl:Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
Ask parker to mix me a Jose cuervo margarita and don't forget the chilled glass with kosher salt:thumbsup:Quote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
All mens men have these habits, that we other halves think are adorable before we become the other half...then we realize our part of the half is getting the same way and our spouses are b... about it (Honey, you don't have to buy new clothes, just stop eating 8 meals a day) :svengo:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
We scratch too; we just run to the bathroom or do it in the car...Uh oh...here comes a semi:smilielol5:Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
Looking for songs to sing with the Foundation (Kindergarten and Pre K/ nursery) kids was looking for boys and girls come out to play I endedup with this and it amused me http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YWIY33BMqQYnote its source!
I wasn't able to download it Nightshade, is there something wrong with my computer?Quote:
Originally Posted by Nightshade
Why do our mates only seem to notice that we haven't chins or waist lines after their names are on all of our property
By the way, Paul, Kenneth Branagh became a sex symbol with no chin or lips...there's still hope for you man
Alas comparing me to Branagh is like comparing a prince to a pig. :piggy:
:D
It's another example of why we men are the better creature.Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
We look with critical eyes at the droops and wrinkles, the cellulite and varicose veins and say:
"You're just as beautiful as the day we met."
Blokes rule.
Whatever anyone thinks about Branagh, he's married to Emma Thompson.Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
I'd swap for a week.
Well Branagh is really good with makeup and lights; and he always makes sure he stands on an elevated stage or wears lifts so no one notices his heigth...Besides, Paul, you are a prince among men; I'm sure branagh would not go through 4 delivery room experiencesQuote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
Unfortunately, all the men I've known are really honest about my appearance; except when they thought I looked really, really good.Quote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
No doubt, for a long time, Emma thought Kenneth was a pig...she dumped him about the time he started sleeping with Helena Bonham Carter...
If you want to swap for Emma now, you'll have to talk to husband, Alan Rickman (snape in Harry Potter and that hot psychopath in Die Hard 2)
Shows how much notice I take of the gossip - I didn't even know they'd split up.Quote:
Originally Posted by soundofmusic
Rickman would be no problem. I could take him out with my left hand.
I'd settle for being a prince among pigs.
All mens men have these habits, that we other halves think are adorable before we become the other half...
Be honest Sounds, I reckon you ladies take us on as a challenge, (Its part of the attraction) and spend the ensuing years try to change us into a Romantic Ideal. (Or Cliff Richards, in my wife's case)
By the way I have :spam: in my sarnies today.
Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
That's another reason to hate spammers - they've destroyed the reputation of one Britain's finest sandwich fillings!
Please - it's only palatable fried in batter as a fritter.Quote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
I disliked spam as a kid - or "luncheon meat" as they called it then.
Luncheon meat - thats a laugh.
"Cucumber sandwich or luncheon meat?" Would you pass the plate please Parker.
Have you done the spam song on here? Apologies if I'm repeating myself, as I surely would if I had spam.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cFrtpT1mKy8
They were delicious, with a splash of mayo on Warburtons sliced white.
and enough left in the tin to fry up for tomorrow, -food heaven.
My kids have gone right off it since I told them what parts of the animals were used in making it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
Are you quite sure that Mrs Atheist hasn't taken a leave of abstinance and left our dear Jocky in drag...I've never met a women yet who leaves the seat up:idea:Quote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
You don't want to do a bra fitting; the old heffers grab your ...and squeeze them:nonod:
I don't know, Rickman seems quite a bit taller and stouter than Kenneth...Not to mention that his proper English accent would intimidate most fellows:boxing_smiley:Quote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
I think it's fair to say we both play at that game; it's just that women know what they're planning from the onset. The guys don't quite realize it until a new secretary comes to the office or they watch an episode of Americas top model:smilielol5:Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
What are sarnies; please don't tell me it's sardines:puke:
Here, Here. I wasn't aware that spam was that bad in the old days. Recently my daughter bought some; it was like eating hard lard:spam::nonod:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
We train 'em well down here.Quote:
Originally Posted by soundofmusic
Old shielas? No way.Quote:
Originally Posted by soundofmusic
I'm setting a strict age limit of 30 as a maximum. After that, it's more plastic surgery than fitting.
:lol:
Sandwiches.Quote:
Originally Posted by soundofmusic
Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
An absolute gold plated classic!
All the tasty parts I'd sayQuote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
Your daughter bought some? unusual to see such sophistication in the younger generation.:wink5:Quote:
Originally Posted by soundofmusic
I'm back from rambling and camping around New Mexico and what would a trip be through New Mexico if you don't stop by Roswell?
(For the sake of the unabducted out there, look up "The Roswell Incident)
Here are a couple of items from the "UFO Museum and Research Center" in Roswell:
Full scale diorama of the the famed alien autopsy.
The alien prop on the gurney was used in the "Showtime" movie; "Roswell":
http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/a...a/IMG_1464.jpg
and lastly, "The Basic Alien Types", subtitled "The Usual Suspects". I had no idea that Magnus Pedi were aso aliens! - Geez, you get the best of both worlds!
http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/a...a/IMG_1461.jpg
Gilliatt
Brilliant!Quote:
Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle
Don't you love how aliens look just like we expect them to?
Impressive,Quote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
So, some sexy young thing will do your fitting then.
Are all women in Australia and NZ called Shielas, or is it a subtype?
Thank you, I like that word...sarnie...:aureola:
Yeah, she taught me everything I know about beans, barley, and meat substitutes. She is a great cook; but even her talents could not cover up the spam...:prrr:Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
That's just really scary. Reminds me of an old teacher I had that claimed that in the "old days" they used to smother ugly babies in the delivery room...that one picture looks like an ugly baby that made it through the screening process.Quote:
Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle
Monty Python, the great historian of the 20th century...:hurray:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
First the rugby. Even though this Nation is shaking its collective fist at the referee, I thank God England didn't win in Paris. They finished higher up the table than they deserved anyway. Scotland, who have played some very good stuff in parts, got a win at last.
In fact, instead of relying on points scored (ie, who the ref favours) they should let me decide who wins each match based on style and endevour. Then the table would be as follows:-
France
Scotland
Italy
Ireland
Wales
England.
I think that is much more satisfactory.
You see examples of all the basic alien types round here, I thought it was due to inbreeding. :brow:
Just a generic term for women.Quote:
Originally Posted by soundofmusic
Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
That's a great idea!
It could be marked like the ski-jump; you start with the score and add or subtract points for being creative or boring.
I see this playing into the hands of France, Australia, Ireland, Scotland and very much against NZ, RSA, England and Argentina. And imagine how good the Pacific Island teams would be!
We're also seeing all the alien types in the states; I thought it was because we keep thrusting everyone into the same soup pot :spam: (or melting pot, as we call it here):smilielol5:Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
Ah - you risk rugby becoming like ballet with shoulder pads. They might even re-design the kit and put it to music. Imagine what it would do to the Hakka - a new routine every campaign!Quote:
Originally Posted by The Atheist
A good balance is needed - flair and style, but some good old fashioned thumping.
Otherwise players like myself in my younger days - whose main skill was running into people, by which I managed to forge a niche as left back for my mate's pub footbal side too - would be redundant. :biggrin5:
The sad part is, they already wear padding. As far as I can tell, it's actually still against the rules of rugby, but since only Paddy O'Brien has ever read them all, they get away with it.Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
Helmets can't be too far away.
I'd bring back rucking, if it were my choice.Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
Nothing like a good going over with 8 pairs of size 10s to sort out the backs from the ballet dancers.
:lol:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
Funny, that's exactly where I used to play in social soccer as well!
It needs thinking about this.
start with 100 points each.
you lose points for pointless kicking, spoiling scrums, spray-on tans and hair gel.
you gain points for prop's sidesteps (thats straight on over the opposition), taking on the winger on the outside, passing the ball, rubbing the tanned, hair gelled scrum half's head in the mud.
I too appeared as left back for my school on a couple of occasions.
I like it!Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
M'a'a N'o'n'u's mascara would be an immediate -20.
I like it too. I'm against all the male make up crap they are trying to sell us these days.Quote:
Originally Posted by prendrelemick
We've got a thread full of left backs - we'd keep some clean sheets, but perhaps we'd not make much of a team. How about you Gilliat and Soundof and gbrekken. Where do you play? You never know - we might rustle up a 5-a side team. :D
Quite right.Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
Nothing like a couple of Liverpool kisses to make sure all shots are long-range.
:D
My sport was running, as in sprinting. I had no choice but to run!Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem
Remember those knuckle dragging playground girls?!
:driving: I'll drive right over; where we playing? I'll get on my striped knickers and pom poms and do some big girl cheering dances:hurray:Quote:
Originally Posted by Paulclem