Chapter 35

INFLUENZA

�Bob,� said Doris next morning, �Miss Lestrange has got the influenza.�

�How do you know?� asked Bob.

�I�ve been to her room, and she�s lying in bed crying. Bob!�

�Well?�

�It�s not the influenza.�

�What are you driving at?� asked Bob.

�Promise not to tell, and you�ll be in it too,� said Doris.

�I promise�go ahead. What are you driving at?�

�She�s going away.�

�Where?�

�To be married.�

�Heu!� said Bob in a disgusted tone.

�But that�s not all,� went on Doris. �She�s going with Mr Fanshawe, and nobody knows about it, only me and you and she and Patsy. She told me if we were good we might see her off; they are going at two o�clock in the morning.�

�My eye!� said Bob, lighting up. �They ain�t running away, are they?�

�They are. They�re running away from the old General and Mr Boxall�going to Dublin to be married. They�re going in the dogcart from the stable-yard�but, mind you, don�t say a word to any one.�

�What do you take me for?� said Bob. �I say, Doris!�

�Yes?�

�Wouldn�t it be prime if the old General chased them?�

�Don�t!� said Doris.

�I was only thinking of him running after them with his great red face, an� shouting to them to stop,� said Bob. He was kneeling on the window-seat of the schoolroom and looking out over the park. �I left that motor-car in the hall yesterday,� went on Bob, �and he hit his toe against it and sent it skidding across the floor, and he said, �Confound those children! they�re always in the way when they�re not wanted, they or their beastly toys.� I was leaning over the banisters and I jolly nearly dropped a marble on his head. Who�s that coming?�

�It�s Doctor O�Flaherty,� said Doris, kneeling up also on the window-seat and looking out at the car which was coming up the drive at a trot.

The car drew up at the door, and Dr O�Flaherty of Tullagh, an old gentleman with grey side-whiskers, a clean-shaved physician�s mouth, and a humorous grey eye, descended and went up the steps.

�Well, James,� said the doctor, as the door opened to him, �and what�s the matter?�

�Her ladyship is poorly, sir, and there�s a houseful of influenza,� replied James, who was not an optimist. �Which will you see first, sir, the influenza or her ladyship?�

�Seniores priores!� said the country doctor cheerily, as he took his stethoscope from his hat, hung his hat up and divested himself of his overcoat. �Her ladyship, James, by all means.�

At this moment the door of the library opened and General Grampound came out.

�I beg your pardon,� said General Grampound, �are you the doctor?�

�I am,� said the practitioner.

�May I have a word with you?�

�With pleasure!�

The General led the way into the library.

�My ward, Miss Lestrange, is down with the influenza,� said General Grampound.

�I am told it�s in the house,� said Dr O�Flaherty.

�I believe the devil�s in the house!� burst out the General. �I had intended leaving by the train this morning from Tullagh, and now this turns up.�

�Influenza has that habit,� said the doctor. �It leaves its card on you in the most unexpected manner.�

�I don�t believe it�s influenza at all!� broke out the General, �and that�s just what I want to talk to you about. I believe it�s malingering.�

�O ho!�

�Yes, sir. I have reasons to suspect that I am a dupe; however, I await your diagnosis. Shall I show you to the door of my ward�s room?�

�Seniores priores,� replied the other rather stiffly. �Her ladyship first, if you please�thank you, I know the house.�

He slipped out of the room; James was waiting for him in the hall.

�And who is the old gentleman at all, James?� asked Dr O�Flaherty, as they passed down the corridor to Lady Seagrave�s room.

�That was General Grampound, doctor,� replied James.

�Faith, he looks it,� replied the other, as he tapped at the bedroom door.

Lady Seagrave was sitting up in bed, with a lace cap on her head, looking very grim and sombre.

�Come in,� said she. �Oh, that�s you�I expected you an hour ago�sit down. There�s no use talking to me,� added she, with a blaze of irritation, �for I�m deaf.�

�Faith, you�ve been a long time finding that out,� murmured O�Flaherty.

�It seized me yesterday morning,� went on the old woman. �I was quite right when I got up; I could hear what my maid said when she brought me my tea, and then it came on. Why don�t you answer me? You sit there without moving your lips like an image.�

�Hum, hum!� said O�Flaherty, whose temper and bluntness were proverbial, �you�ve been deaf in your ears and deaf in your senses all the time I�ve known you. Deaf! Faith, it�s a megaphone, not a trumpet, they�ll want to raise you out of your coffin with when the time comes.�

�There you are!� said Lady Seagrave. �I can tell what you say by the movements of your lips. It is not influenza�some doctors seem to have influenza on the brain.�

�Faith, and that�s a disease you�ll never have,� said the practitioner, taking a snuff-box from his pocket and a pinch.

Lady Seagrave objected to tobacco, but she did not mind a person taking snuff in her presence. She was of that day.

�You think because there is influenza in the house I must have it. I haven�t; I expect it�s a little cold. However, I haven�t sent for you to tinker over my ears, but to see a patient. I have a guest who is down with influenza�a Mr Boxall, a Member of Parliament�but he refuses to see a doctor.�

�Then,� said O�Flaherty, �he must have more sense in him than the ordinary Members of Parliament.�

�I know�it�s very foolish of him, but he is not going to pursue his foolishness under my roof. He must be seen.�

O�Flaherty nodded his head.

�You had better go and see him now,� said her ladyship, �and not waste any more of your time on me. If he is very bad you can tell James, and he will let me know, and you�d better call again to-morrow. Good-day.�

She pulled a big bell-rope beside her bed to summon James, who was lingering in the passage, and the doctor with an old-fashioned bow to his patient and a grin on his lips left the room.

�The man�s a fool,� murmured the old lady to herself, as she settled down in her bed, �but he�s respectful�the sort of country doctor I remember when doctors called themselves apothecaries and knew their proper places.�

�This room, sir,� said James. He knocked at the door next to Lady Seagrave�s.

�Come in,� said a woman�s voice, and O�Flaherty found himself in the presence of a pretty girl, fully dressed, seated in a basket armchair and busily engaged in tearing up letters. A dressing-bag half stuffed with things stood on a chair.

Half an hour later, coming downstairs, Dr O�Flaherty met General Grampound in the hall.

�Well, doctor,� said the General, drawing him into the library, �what�s the diagnosis?�

�Just a chill.�

�Will she be able to leave here to-morrow?�

�She will,� replied the other, with a twinkle in his eye; �and, what�s more, she�s anxious to go.�

�Hum! Have you seen my friend Boxall?�

�No,� replied the doctor, �but he saw me.�

�How do you know?�

�Through the keyhole, for he bolted his door.�

�I can�t make out what�s wrong with the man,� said General Grampound.