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Chapter 3

Just at that time the Japanese were casting far and wide for ships
of European build, and he had no difficulty in finding a purchaser, a
speculator who drove a hard bargain, but paid cash down for the Fair
Maid, with a view to a profitable resale. Thus it came about that
Captain Whalley found himself on a certain afternoon descending the
steps of one of the most important post-offices of the East with a slip
of bluish paper in his hand. This was the receipt of a registered letter
enclosing a draft for two hundred pounds, and addressed to Melbourne.
Captain Whalley pushed the paper into his waistcoat-pocket, took his
stick from under his arm, and walked down the street.

It was a recently opened and untidy thoroughfare with rudimentary
side-walks and a soft layer of dust cushioning the whole width of
the road. One end touched the slummy street of Chinese shops near the
harbor, the other drove straight on, without houses, for a couple of
miles, through patches of jungle-like vegetation, to the yard gates
of the new Consolidated Docks Company. The crude frontages of the new
Government buildings alternated with the blank fencing of vacant plots,
and the view of the sky seemed to give an added spaciousness to the
broad vista. It was empty and shunned by natives after business
hours, as though they had expected to see one of the tigers from the
neighborhood of the New Waterworks on the hill coming at a loping canter
down the middle to get a Chinese shopkeeper for supper. Captain Whalley
was not dwarfed by the solitude of the grandly planned street. He
had too fine a presence for that. He was only a lonely figure walking
purposefully, with a great white beard like a pilgrim, and with a thick
stick that resembled a weapon. On one side the new Courts of Justice had
a low and unadorned portico of squat columns half concealed by a few old
trees left in the approach. On the other the pavilion wings of the
new Colonial Treasury came out to the line of the street. But Captain
Whalley, who had now no ship and no home, remembered in passing that
on that very site when he first came out from England there had stood a
fishing village, a few mat huts erected on piles between a muddy tidal
creek and a miry pathway that went writhing into a tangled wilderness
without any docks or waterworks.

No ship--no home. And his poor Ivy away there had no home either. A
boarding-house is no sort of home though it may get you a living. His
feelings were horribly rasped by the idea of the boarding-house. In his
rank of life he had that truly aristocratic temperament characterized by
a scorn of vulgar gentility and by prejudiced views as to the derogatory
nature of certain occupations. For his own part he had always preferred
sailing merchant ships (which is a straightforward occupation) to buying
and selling merchandise, of which the essence is to get the better of
somebody in a bargain--an undignified trial of wits at best. His father
had been Colonel Whalley (retired) of the H. E. I. Company's service,
with very slender means besides his pension, but with distinguished
connections. He could remember as a boy how frequently waiters at the
inns, country tradesmen and small people of that sort, used to "My lord"
the old warrior on the strength of his appearance.

Captain Whalley himself (he would have entered the Navy if his father
had not died before he was fourteen) had something of a grand air which
would have suited an old and glorious admiral; but he became lost like
a straw in the eddy of a brook amongst the swarm of brown and yellow
humanity filling a thoroughfare, that by contrast with the vast and
empty avenue he had left seemed as narrow as a lane and absolutely
riotous with life. The walls of the houses were blue; the shops of the
Chinamen yawned like cavernous lairs; heaps of nondescript merchandise
overflowed the gloom of the long range of arcades, and the fiery
serenity of sunset took the middle of the street from end to end with a
glow like the reflection of a fire. It fell on the bright colors and the
dark faces of the bare-footed crowd, on the pallid yellow backs of the
half-naked jostling coolies, on the accouterments of a tall Sikh trooper
with a parted beard and fierce mustaches on sentry before the gate of
the police compound. Looming very big above the heads in a red haze of
dust, the tightly packed car of the cable tramway navigated cautiously
up the human stream, with the incessant blare of its horn, in the manner
of a steamer groping in a fog.

Captain Whalley emerged like a diver on the other side, and in the
desert shade between the walls of closed warehouses removed his hat to
cool his brow. A certain disrepute attached to the calling of a
landlady of a boarding-house. These women were said to be rapacious,
unscrupulous, untruthful; and though he contemned no class of his
fellow-creatures--God forbid!--these were suspicions to which it was
unseemly that a Whalley should lay herself open. He had not expostulated
with her, however. He was confident she shared his feelings; he was
sorry for her; he trusted her judgment; he considered it a merciful
dispensation that he could help her once more,--but in his aristocratic
heart of hearts he would have found it more easy to reconcile himself to
the idea of her turning seamstress. Vaguely he remembered reading years
ago a touching piece called the "Song of the Shirt." It was all very
well making songs about poor women. The granddaughter of Colonel
Whalley, the landlady of a boarding-house! Pooh! He replaced his hat,
dived into two pockets, and stopping a moment to apply a flaring match
to the end of a cheap cheroot, blew an embittered cloud of smoke at a
world that could hold such surprises.

Of one thing he was certain--that she was the own child of a clever
mother. Now he had got over the wrench of parting with his ship, he
perceived clearly that such a step had been unavoidable. Perhaps he had
been growing aware of it all along with an unconfessed knowledge. But
she, far away there, must have had an intuitive perception of it, with
the pluck to face that truth and the courage to speak out--all the
qualities which had made her mother a woman of such excellent counsel.

It would have had to come to that in the end! It was fortunate she had
forced his hand. In another year or two it would have been an utterly
barren sale. To keep the ship going he had been involving himself deeper
every year. He was defenseless before the insidious work of adversity,
to whose more open assaults he could present a firm front; like a
cliff that stands unmoved the open battering of the sea, with a lofty
ignorance of the treacherous backwash undermining its base. As it was,
every liability satisfied, her request answered, and owing no man a
penny, there remained to him from the proceeds a sum of five hundred
pounds put away safely. In addition he had upon his person some forty
odd dollars--enough to pay his hotel bill, providing he did not linger
too long in the modest bedroom where he had taken refuge.

Scantily furnished, and with a waxed floor, it opened into one of
the side-verandas. The straggling building of bricks, as airy as a
bird-cage, resounded with the incessant flapping of rattan screens
worried by the wind between the white-washed square pillars of the
sea-front. The rooms were lofty, a ripple of sunshine flowed over the
ceilings; and the periodical invasions of tourists from some passenger
steamer in the harbor flitted through the wind-swept dusk of the
apartments with the tumult of their unfamiliar voices and impermanent
presences, like relays of migratory shades condemned to speed headlong
round the earth without leaving a trace. The babble of their irruptions
ebbed out as suddenly as it had arisen; the draughty corridors and
the long chairs of the verandas knew their sight-seeing hurry or
their prostrate repose no more; and Captain Whalley, substantial and
dignified, left well-nigh alone in the vast hotel by each light-hearted
skurry, felt more and more like a stranded tourist with no aim in view,
like a forlorn traveler without a home. In the solitude of his room he
smoked thoughtfully, gazing at the two sea-chests which held all that he
could call his own in this world. A thick roll of charts in a sheath
of sailcloth leaned in a corner; the flat packing-case containing the
portrait in oils and the three carbon photographs had been pushed under
the bed. He was tired of discussing terms, of assisting at surveys, of
all the routine of the business. What to the other parties was merely
the sale of a ship was to him a momentous event involving a radically
new view of existence. He knew that after this ship there would be no
other; and the hopes of his youth, the exercise of his abilities, every
feeling and achievement of his manhood, had been indissolubly connected
with ships. He had served ships; he had owned ships; and even the years
of his actual retirement from the sea had been made bearable by the idea
that he had only to stretch out his hand full of money to get a ship. He
had been at liberty to feel as though he were the owner of all the
ships in the world. The selling of this one was weary work; but when
she passed from him at last, when he signed the last receipt, it was as
though all the ships had gone out of the world together, leaving him on
the shore of inaccessible oceans with seven hundred pounds in his hands.

Striding firmly, without haste, along the quay, Captain Whalley averted
his glances from the familiar roadstead. Two generations of seamen born
since his first day at sea stood between him and all these ships at the
anchorage. His own was sold, and he had been asking himself, What next?

From the feeling of loneliness, of inward emptiness,--and of loss
too, as if his very soul had been taken out of him forcibly,--there had
sprung at first a desire to start right off and join his daughter.
"Here are the last pence," he would say to her; "take them, my dear. And
here's your old father: you must take him too."

His soul recoiled, as if afraid of what lay hidden at the bottom of
this impulse. Give up! Never! When one is thoroughly weary all sorts of
nonsense come into one's head. A pretty gift it would have been for a
poor woman--this seven hundred pounds with the incumbrance of a hale old
fellow more than likely to last for years and years to come. Was he not
as fit to die in harness as any of the youngsters in charge of these
anchored ships out yonder? He was as solid now as ever he had been. But
as to who would give him work to do, that was another matter. Were he,
with his appearance and antecedents, to go about looking for a junior's
berth, people, he was afraid, would not take him seriously; or else if
he succeeded in impressing them, he would maybe obtain their pity, which
would be like stripping yourself naked to be kicked. He was not anxious
to give himself away for less than nothing. He had no use for anybody's
pity. On the other hand, a command--the only thing he could try for with
due regard for common decency--was not likely to be lying in wait
for him at the corner of the next street. Commands don't go a-begging
nowadays. Ever since he had come ashore to carry out the business of
the sale he had kept his ears open, but had heard no hint of one being
vacant in the port. And even if there had been one, his successful past
itself stood in his way. He had been his own employer too long. The only
credential he could produce was the testimony of his whole life. What
better recommendation could anyone require? But vaguely he felt that
the unique document would be looked upon as an archaic curiosity of the
Eastern waters, a screed traced in obsolete words--in a half-forgotten
language.

Joseph Conrad

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