Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

[The Atheist]

What?

The slag heaps are the heritage.

[Paulclem]

Eee I remember when if wor all slag 'eaps round 'ere. Afore the' tore em down to make way f' theritige park! Them were t'days .

Aye, we used to get reet mucky launchin erselves from top t' bottom. We'd go 'ome black an blue, an covered from 'ead t' foot wi coal dust.

Ah remember me mam would shout - get thisen in 'ere, and gi' me a slap as I tried to duck under 'er swingin' fist.

Them were t' days.

[The Atheist]

[jocky]

To whom it may concern, apart from New Zealand, Florida, Nevada and Texas. The Six Nations start next week. Let me be the first to extend the hand of friendship to all those who are perhaps not Scottish, Welsh, Irish, Italian or Frogs. Some may say this is directed to my English neighbours, but never Jocky, who is renowned for his fair mindedness. Your slag heaps are about to be dismantled and your Green and Pleasant Land shattered forever. Best wishes from Jockland.

[The Atheist]

The Six Nations start next week.

A fiver on Scotland to win?

They did beat Australia.

[prendrelemick]

Dismantle our Yorkshire Munroes! Never .

As a follower of the M62 corridor-code when it comes to Rugby, I didn't realize it was 6 nations yawnion time again.

I'll have a fiver on Wales- poor things need some encouragement.

[jocky]

A fiver on Scotland to win?

They did beat Australia.

Don't do it Atheist! I get the blame for everything as it is, but I will not be held responsible for you losing a fiver. Mind you 22/1 against Scotland to win the grand slam....I wonder if the wife has got any money....

Dismantle our Yorkshire Munroes! Never .

As a follower of the M62 corridor-code when it comes to Rugby, I didn't realize it was 6 nations yawnion time again.

I'll have a fiver on Wales- poor things need some encouragement.

A rugby league adherent. My son in law is a huge fan of Hull Kingston Rovers, I told my daughter this signified a distinct lack of breeding and an absense of moral rectitude, but she still went and married him. Keep away from that 'Windy Hill' a scene of desolation if ever there was one.

[The Atheist]

Don't do it Atheist! I get the blame for everything as it is, but I will not be held responsible for you losing a fiver. Mind you 22/1 against Scotland to win the grand slam....I wonder if the wife has got any money....

Better send me the money - they're at 25 here.

Any Italians around? I see they're at 250!

My son in law is a huge fan of Hull Kingston Rovers,

Do his knuckles drag on the ground when he walks?

Common among league supporters, I've found.

I'll have a fiver on Wales- poor things need some encouragement.

Do they ever!

The best thing about Wales and rugby was when we had Jonah playing for us and the ABs played the pride of Wales.

Some great headlines available.

"Jonah Destroys Wales"... that kind of thing.

[Paulclem]

Do his knuckles drag on the ground when he walks?

Common among league supporters, I've found.

We refer to some of them as "Rock Apes". The alpha male bloke-men who had beards when they were 12 and became fully grown over the summer holidays. They would return to school after the long hot summer and terrorise the neighbourhood of the playground. They could be tracked by the lines of spit they left behind them.

One such creature - Baz was his name - would assault our underdeveloped selves with the challenge

"Every spice on yer!" which meant - give me all your sweets.

If you refused - as I always did being protective of my polos, he would, like some ancient demagogue, give you a magnanimous choice - 50 biffs or a crusty.

50 biffs were 50 arm punches from this drooling silverback. A crusty was a knuckle-down punch on the top of the head. Few could stand more than 15 biffs before collapsing in agony upon the tarmac yard. A crusty downed even the most stalward detractor. I still have dints.

So, yes, out there in the wilds of Yorkshire, stalk knuckle draggers with pockets full of sweeties.

League is still better than union, but down here in the Midlands, I don't get much chance to watch owt else.

[The Atheist]

Classic!

I recall those kids. I even met up with one a few years ago, and while he was big at school, he stopped growing and only ended up at 5'9". I stared down at him from the extra five inches I tower above him by and asked if he'd hit any kids lately.

He just wandered away, saying nothing.

Some things are worth waiting 30 years for.

[jocky]

Guys, your childhood traumas are as nothing compared with mine, mere toys. I remember my first scrap at school, my opponent was nicknamed, The BONECRUSHER. When I finally regained conciousness and crawled slowly home at midnight, I looked at my old man through my one good eye and sobbed; ' father, life has got to be better than this. ' To which he replied, ' son we are merely competing atoms'. I said, ' But da, I don't want to be a competing atom, surely there must be some alternative. ' He replied ' Yes son, you could be a dead atom '

[Paulclem]

Classic!

I recall those kids. I even met up with one a few years ago, and while he was big at school, he stopped growing and only ended up at 5'9". I stared down at him from the extra five inches I tower above him by and asked if he'd hit any kids lately.

He just wandered away, saying nothing.

Some things are worth waiting 30 years for.

That's great. Unfortunately for me, I'm only 5 9 too. It'd be touch and go whether history would repeat itself.

[jocky]

Any Italians around? I see they're at 250/1

I hear they are thinking of playing Berlesconi, apparently he can take a hit.

That's great. Unfortunately for me, I'm only 5 9 too.

In the land of Hobbits, he who is 5 9 is king.

[The Atheist]

That's great. Unfortunately for me, I'm only 5 9 too. It'd be touch and go whether history would repeat itself.

Yeah, I got lucky!

I hear they are thinking of playing Berlesconi, apparently he can take a hit.

[jocky]

Will someone go and check on Soundo, Gilliatt and Gbrekken ? I hope no one has offended anyone, everything said on this thread is tongue in cheek and what we call banter. You need to reappear folks. You know old Jocky gets lonely.