Anyone for Coffee? (no boys allowed)

[Scheherazade]

Just for clarification, I went by this definition of sissy:

a boy who other boys dislike and laugh at because they think he is weak or interested in activities girls usually like, or a person who is weak and cowardly:

http://dictionary.cambridge.org/defi...3944&dict=CALD

[Virgil]

Geez I haven't been in here in a while and since the girls have been barging into the guys thread I decided to step in here. Whoa, a discussion of bad boys.

Sometimes the good boys can have too much of the feminine in them. They can seem too much like girls.

Did you know I'm Mad, Bad, and Dangerous to Know?

[MissScarlett]

I know now, Virgil, but I've no idea why. You seem pleasant enough to me.

Scheherazade, I don't think good boys are necessarily sissies or mama's boys.

We all have some masculine and feminine in us - animus and anima, and it seems the feminine is prized in both sexes. Men generally (not always) go for the very feminine women. A lot of women love the men who'll take care of the kids, cook, do the laundry, aren't mama's boys, but are nurturing in a way society usually ascribes to females. (Macho men are not nurturing at all, I don't think.)

But sometimes, I think the good guys just seem too much like the girls. Too nurturing can be a turn off to some women. I really don't want a guy buying me flowers every Friday or telling me he loves me ten times a day or cooking my dinner every single night. That makes me feel smothered. I need some space - at times.

I guess I like a basically good boy, with a dash of bad boy in him.

[Sapphire]

The problem is always in the definition: are good guys sizzies and bad guys brutes? Then I would say "neither", thank you. But that's not all there is to it.

I googled "define: bad boy" and got (besides many songs ) this description

The bad boy, cad or bounder is a male who behaves badly, especially towards women. Being a promiscuous rogue may be as successful a reproductive strategy as being a reliable provider. Women are especially attracted to such bad boys when they are ovulating. According to an article in The Independent, there is a "dark triad" consisting of narcissism, thrill-seeking, and deceitfulness.

The attraction of beautiful women to the "bad boy" archetype is attributed both to his confidence, intriguing mystery, seeming indifference (suggesting an abundance of sexual options) and unavailability, which challenge them to chase him. This contrasts with supplicating men who seem needy and desperate to please, suggesting lower value, and so are less attractive.

The bad boy is a common archetype in romance novels.

Erm... that's not really putting the bad boy in a good light, is it?! I do wonder though, why is there an "article" (or some sentences) about "bad boys" but not about "good boys"?

Oh, and Scheherazade - you are quite right in saying there should not be rules to follow. That is what makes love so exciting, but also quite confusing most of the time

[Silas Thorne]

I know now, Virgil, but I've no idea why. You seem pleasant enough to me.

That's precisely why he's dangerous.Gotta' watch these ones!

[Eugenie]

Thankyou both.
Sapphire, a good thing to do is just boil the water on the stove, remove and put another pot on top and then grate the beeswax. It will still m elt but it won't be on the stove. I too am a clutz sometimes, honestly I don't even know how I do it, but so far I have never hurt myself. The cool thing about making your own stuff is you can customize it and see what it does for your skin with little money outlaid.
And you know you can make a nice batch of skin cream without the beeswax at all, it is not imperative to have it. Just make sure you put your stuff in a clearly marked bottle or jar and put into the fridge.
Speaking about clutzyness, I just read this very morning that actor Bill Murray was so terrible yesterday on the golf course that one of his balls he hit sailed across the street and hit a woman sitting in her own yard. how embarrassing, right?
Do any of you have an absolute favorite food or foods that are comforting to you , good times and bad and you just love, love , love?
I am not the grab a chocolate or icecream person, you will laugh when I tell you.
I have no idea why I do this unless it is from all the years of my family members owning restaurants, but if I have the time and am stressed I make chicken, stuffing, yes stuffing, creamy mashed potatoes and salad with homemade dressing. I eat it slowly and have obvious ten million pounds left over for eighty more stressful days. I think it reminds me of my childhood and the special days when we ate that stuff. It is totally time consuming but it is what I do.And then all that washing up. sigh. Why could not I just eat a pizza or a bag of chips which I love? who knows.

[Sapphire]

Thanks for explaining again Sounds like you've got quite some experience with cooking - I always try to stay away from that as far as I can So, needless to say that my comfort food would be pizza My favourite food over all would also be pizza (with salami, cheese and pine apple) any ways, so why not use it as comfort food?

Fruit is also grand - you can really put your teeth in an apple and chew full of anger

[Eugenie]

I never thought about the apple thing, how true, I will try it. I usually make bread and knead and knead and knead to punch out the anger and pain. It is great therapy and the bread is oh so light.

What sort of books comfort you, you know the only ones you find you could read a hundred times and never get tired of them?

[MissScarlett]

For me, it's the light stuff, but still well written, like the Alexander McCall Smith Mma Ramotswe series (not so fond of Isabel Dalhousie), the Agatha Christie Miss Marples, even an occasional Inspector Lynley mystery by Elizabeth George. Also Jane Austen because things always work out in those. They are comforting.

[Eugenie]

lovely, I too like some of those. On a rainy day, snuggled up in something warm and blankety and with a hot cup of wonderful tea I love to read them again, and again and I just sail back to other times that were precious and it is most comforting.

[master chief]

hi im new to this thread... you may not have guessed but i AM a girl... a girl who likes to play violent games....but nonetheless, still a girl.


so whats going on these days? *sips coffee*

[Eugenie]

So you're a girl are you , hmmmmmmmmmm, I know how to tell. what is your favorite scent and color of nail and toe polish. And what do you really think of guys.?

Everything is new really.

I love love love this thread, because I don't have to apologize for being very feminine or having feelings like a woman. It is a sanctuary, a tiny internet sanctuary, but one all the same.

When any of you think about the ultimate feminine outfit to wear to a posh dinner, and I do mean posh, what does it look like, and hair and makeup as well.
So for summer what would it look like, or spring or autumn or winter.
I love to visualize that sort of thing, it is so very enjoyable to me when I am taking a break from work or whatever.

Oh, and .............a very sincere welcome Master Chef.

[Sapphire]

Welcome indeed What about some coffee while we're at it?



Eugenie, I have no favourite scent, nor a favourite colour nail polish I know some guys that have pretty strict ideas about that though regarding their girls So I am afraid that won't do as a "girl test" . I can not help you on how to dress posh either... I know however that a perfect "comfort book" is all of the the comics on Calvin and Hobbes by Bill Waterspoon. They always make me smile again

[Tournesol]

Sapphire, I totally agree...Calvin and Hobbes gets me laughing in no time, and my stresses melt away..
If I want a lengthier read though, I read a charming and seldom-known novel called 'Charley' by Joan G. Robinson.

It's about a 12 yr old girl who runs away from home, and lives in a hen house in the woods for about 2 weeks!

Which 12 yr old girl hasn't dreamt of running away!!
[of course I would never consider something like that now, nor would I condone it....gosh, I hope there aren't any 12 yr olds reading this thread!!]

[motherhubbard]

I sure couldn't live in a hen house for 2 weeks. Maybe I just need to clean mine out.