Picture Poetry Contest (...continued...)

[mazHur]

The Long Wait
by mazHur

the marvels of modern science
are no solace for the heart;
cities are like jungles of traffic,
shops laden with treasures;
days are days but nights
too glisten like days
illuminated by electrical savers and neons;
But I stand holding my umbrella
in this hustle bustle of life,
nay, overly scattered life,
alone, amazed at the ambiance
thinking whether I should move ahead
Or retract as he, my love,
seems to have been stuck
in some traffic jam somewhere;
or forgotten, no, impossible,
or having time with another date,
Oh, no, that's unbelievable!
Waiting is a roguish exercise
breeds apprehensions and suspicion,
weakens the ties of love and friendship;
Be it so or whatever, I shall wait
until my Kamikaze comes;
trifle is all this hustle bustle
without him- my heart, my love;
Let Ginza sparkle with all its beauty
Waiting for my love is now my duty!
Sayonara to all who read my poem,
I end it with a gesture of goodwill
for all of you, where ever you are;
please pray for my love to be here
before the shadows of night overtake
the naked sun and the mild drizzle
transforms into heavy rain
and melts down all my dreams!
My way I wish to thank all of ya,
Ary gaato guzai mashta!!

..............................

[Epistemophile]

THE PHOTOGRAPHER

A voice comes in gently through the air
Loses itself in the surrounding mist
Silence tolls its broken, lonely bells
And the sinewy streets now daylight ensnare

After the rain has fallen, after the ghosts have left
After all the half-whispered prayers have been read
There falls a shadow amidst the neon city lights
And you stand there waiting, patient yet bereft.

Waiting and searching with vacant desperation slow
Caught in the traffic web of humans and cars
You wear an empty smile on your reflected face
Unaware, your parasol watches the rain that falls no more

And I see you from a certain distance
And the wet streets sparkling like minute stars
And the sudden magical light on your fluid skirt
Impressions converge in a smooth unending instance

And there you stand at the edge of an alien street
Forever shall you wait and forever try to reach
Over the cell phone, another voice you know
Always shall I be silent, always still, if you and I ever meet.

[autolycus]

Ho ho... now I am in serious trouble. Too many good entries.

It's a good kind of trouble. I love it!

[AdoreroDio]

Aisuru

O Foolish Weather!
Don't you know?
Don't you realize that today
today is the day
In my thudding heart
and pulsing veins
I know that tonight
Oh tonight!
Tonight will be my night!
O Foolish Weather!
To rain!
To pour!
The somber drip of water
upon my spotted umbrella
why not be bright?
Why not shine?
O Foolish Weather!

O Whimsical Weather!
You know me too well
you know tonight
must be unique
why shine?
why glisten?
when tonight must be different!
In my blushing cheeks I know
In my smiling lips
it shows
tonight must be my night
O Whimsical Weather!
Your glistening drops
like diamonds fall
covering this world
pausing it for me
that I might savor this night
my night
O Whimsical Weather!

O Romantic Weather!
How could I have doubted?
tonight is indeed my night
that I might dance
my umbrella spinning beside me
as I turn in circles
waiting for that one special car
to take me away!
take me to the place that will make
this night
my night
and his!
O Romantic Weather!
Your rain drops
drip a special beat
just for me
so I can dance!
and laugh!
And smile!
Tonight is my night
the night he asks that question
I know is hanging on his lips
I heard it in his call
over my phone
which clings to my ear
when I heard him say
"I love you. Come."
I know it
and my answer
waits on my smile
where is that fateful car?
Rain be my good omen
that more dancing
is too come
O Romantic Weather!

[autolycus]

Just a reminder: deadline is 24 October, which is the coming Friday... *grin* wonderful, lyrical, human entries. I am so dead!

[autolycus]

Last day, and then we'll leave that lovely young lady still waiting in the rain...

[autolycus]

Hello, my dear colleagues!

This contest is now closed. Much appreciation and many thanks to alakungu, Pendragon, mazHur, Epistemophile and AdoreroDia for your fine contributions.

I'll get the decision up by midweek so that the winner can start a new month afresh.

Thanks again!

[autolycus]

It's always hard to pick a winner around here. I suspect this time round it was harder than most other times!

Here is my take on the five entries.

1. Night in Japan

You've missed the essence,
You're missing the point.
Tokyo wasn't built in a day.
How many temples did technology anoint?

This is certainly not an easy question to answer. There's a fusion of western questioning and terminology with a zen-like approach to not giving direct answers. And it captures that Japanese ambivalence very nicely, in an unsettling sort of way.

2. Love by Chance

But the time was running out and I had to go,
The clock doesn’t wait for anyone you see.
All through my boring meeting I thought about her.
Did she have a boyfriend? What did she think of white men?
I drove back hopefully have the chance to speak to her,
But the corner was as empty as my dreams and plans.

Another cultural clash is implicit here. We see the urgency of the clock and the need for answers — met all too sadly by the empty hand. Very poignant, with a raw sense of missed opportunities.

3. The Long Wait

the marvels of modern science
are no solace for the heart;
cities are like jungles of traffic,
shops laden with treasures...

...my love,
seems to have been stuck
in some traffic jam somewhere;
or forgotten, no, impossible,
or having time with another date,
Oh, no, that's unbelievable!
Waiting is a roguish exercise
breeds apprehensions and suspicion...

Somehow, everyone here is capturing that odd blend of westernization and indigenous thought that lies buried in every modern Japanese scene. Somehow, mazHur also manages to capture the occasional sad humor of the whole thing as well!

4. The Photographer

A voice comes in gently through the air
Loses itself in the surrounding mist
Silence tolls its broken, lonely bells
And the sinewy streets now daylight ensnare...

This poem uses an almost elegiac pace to ensnare its subject. The focus is the cellphone in her hand, and the seeming fruitlessness of the situation, percolating down the corridors of time. Beautiful.

5. Aisuru

O Foolish Weather!
Don't you know?
Don't you realize that today
today is the day
In my thudding heart
and pulsing veins
I know that tonight
Oh tonight!
Tonight will be my night!

And whimsical and romantic weather too, AD says. The romantic comedy stands out here, with the exclamation marks falling in a light drizzle through a poem that is very much like the picture itself, but a lot less dark in tone.

I'd have to say, though, that the balance of manic and reflective, east and west, east looking at west and west looking at east, and other delightful moments... is most obvious in mazHur's The Long Wait. This wasn't the easiest decision to make: I think that for once, I really couldn't decide which poem was best in terms of technique or style. But mazHur's poem manages a bit of everything which I think is in that photograph, and wins by a roguish raindrop.

Congratulations, mazHur!

Thanks to all the poets who responded to that lone Japanese girl; the best thing is that all of you produced such evocative pieces, plaintive and humorous, elegant and visceral — all the things you might find in such a place. Wonderful! I look forward to mazHur's picture.

[Pendragon]

Congratulations, Maz! Wait for your picture with bated breath...

[mazHur]

Autolycus,
thank you very much for deciding my poem,,
I like the phrase ''by a roguish raindrop''....heard it for the first time!
Pen, thank you as well.

My picture?? Or, picture?

Here's the next picture



Let's go!

[mazHur]

Autolycus

Acceding to your request I found no way out but to post my picture(s)
on the litnet photoAlbum

here is the link

http://www.online-literature.com/for...444#post634444

[Pendragon]

Flowers of Desolation

The white sand blows,
Raked rows like in a Zen garden—
Uncared for by human hands.
The heat beats down.
Little enough rain falls upon the dune,
Nourishment is short.
The lone yucca plant
Blooms despite of the circumstances,
Triumph of hope over expectation…

Pendragon
© 11/31/01

[Pendragon]

Is competition too much to ask for, my friends?

[lucidnightmares]

hopefully this isn`t to late
pen i completely agree. i`m alittle sad that this topic isn`t more active, but i`m glad i got to take part in it.
hopefully some more poets better than i can take part as well





the ripples of humanity often find
nothing
crawling along the searing earth
forever
eternity is quite perplex in that
nothing is eternal

the world lacks the will to continue
and thus we create our own
for we must have logic, must construe
lest give into fear of the unknown

so sand will criss
and the oceans cross
un-aware of the abyss
the unfathomable loss

and then the criss and cross shall meet
destiny plays it`s part
life
a single sprout gave way to forests
forests to man
and man to himself

the only constant
is continuity
life never dies
so long as birth exists

seed
tree
wither
seed


seed tree wither........seed

and thus life goes on alone, yet beautiful.

[symphony]

So few entries?!
When's the deadline? May be i can spend a bit more time here after tomorrow's exam, i'll see if i can try my hand on this...