Can boys and girls be friends?

[Stanislaw]

Yes. Women are changing. They are more freer to express their sexuality these days than when they were in victorian times. Perhaps this emotional needs comes from too much dependency on men in the past?

What about Queen E. the virgin queen (or rather the queen who was anything but...)

[Lote-Tree]

What about Queen E. the virgin queen (or rather the queen who was anything but...)

And she expressed her Sexuality quite well in the courts I believe :-)

[EAP]

nope. most women can't separate sex and love and they end up having feelings for the guy who considers her nothing more than a _____ buddy.

Stereotypes are cool.

What is wrong with being friends-with-benefits or sex buddies?

[Lote-Tree]

What is wrong with being friends-with-benefits or sex buddies?

Nothing.

[SleepyWitch]

What is wrong with being friends-with-benefits or sex buddies?

nothing, if both of them agree that that's what they want.
the kind of situation I had in mind was this:
two people get to know each other, e.g. at school, work etc
the girl doesn't mind talking to the guy but she doesn't show him any special attention.
the guy takes her "good-morning"s and "how are you"s to mean something else than they mean. when they have coffee or lunch together, e.g. at the canteen, he sees it as a date (for the girl, it's not a date, only common courtesy; why should she not have lunch with her colleague, class mate etc)

sooner or later the guy finds out that the girl does not want to date him. he is totally shocked, upset, dismayed, and feels betrayed and cheated.

---> why does this happen so often and why do guys seem to misunderstand these situations more often than girls?

[Shalot]

Stereotypes are cool.

What is wrong with being friends-with-benefits or sex buddies?

please explain what you mean by stereotypes?

There is nothing wrong with friends-with-benefits except that friendships usually last a few years and that's it. but when you have one or more sex buddies you run the risk of passing all kinds of stds like hpv and hsv -- neither one will kill you but you keep them for life. (the hpv or hsv that is)

and all because of your friend....

gotta be careful who you do the deed with if I am going to contract some herpes it better come from someone I love .... :shrug:

[Taliesin]

Well, about sexual tension - maybe we are frigid or something but we are not sexually attracted to every (young) female we meet. Jeesh. Wonder how we could think about anything else if we did.

[EAP]

eh, forget it.

[Shalot]

eh, forget it.

I'm disappointed.

I wasn't asking what a stereotype was, if that's your issue.

[Sir Chaucer]

I've just come home from bill-paying and shopping.

Normally I would come home to an empty house but today my cleaner came early so let herself in, cleaned up and, passed me a cup of coffee as soon as I had put my electric scooter on charge and sat down.

Sheer bliss for me but, what's this to do with friendship between man and woman?

Well, my cleaner is an intelligent woman, we often talk, putting the world to rights and so on and, we've become friends.

But, no way would I consider her any more than just a friend, and believe me, being totally on my own, I really do want more than friendship.

And yes, during our talks she's trusted me with relationship matters which I would not reveal to anyone and, she knows and understands my "Loneliness" so to speak. So, to me...

She's more than a cleaner, she's a trusted friend whom I allow into my house even when I'm not at home and...

No Way could I ever consider breaking that trust by suggesting a relationship!

(PS. I employ a cleaner because I'm disabled and unable to do many things for myself and, not because I'm filthy rich and can't be bothered)

[Mortis Anarchy]

Boys and Girls can totally be friends. When I was little...kindergarten-present day, I have always had more friends that were boys than girls. I've only been in two relationships, both horrible, but I find that I get more out of being friends, only friends, with guys than if I were to date them. Granted, most of the time my friends that are guys I haven't really been attracted to them. Not that they weren't physically appealing or whatever, but I just haven't thought of them in that relationship type of way.

Shalot, your funny! The whole herpes thing...I'm sorry, I found in entertaining.: Not in a sarcastic way either.

[applepie]

It is very possible but there are so many rules it seems. Most of my friends are guys, they are more mine and my husbands. I just don't get on with too many women since I have more in common with all the guys I know. Now here go some rules. Whether he is married or single he isn't to be at the house when I'm alone. It just looks wrong and rumors fly in this town. You can't go to the movies together or even go to the bar and leave your spouse at home... yadda yadda yadda. I'm sure you get the picture. We're friends, but relegated to group gatherings. If you aren't married the it is open game. Before my marriage I went out every week with a group of guy pals and played pool. We would go get a bite to eat after and just had an all around good time. I would also hook up with one or more to go to the movies. The trick is knowing how to manage them. If you find one has an interest in you then don't go out when it is just the two of you. Other than that, be prepared to brush off any number of jokes that could offend. Slaps on the bum happen too. It is just part of the course, at least with my group.

[the silent x]

Yes. Women are changing. They are more freer to express their sexuality these days than when they were in victorian times. Perhaps this emotional needs comes from too much dependency on men in the past?

if you have read Eaters of the dead/13th warrior by michael crichton, then you know of the sex those women went through, i think society is on a cycle in everything, our popular music will eventually cycle back to the reinventation of jazz, oldies, and country music, just like fashion will eventually go to people wearing almost nothing, to people wearing clothing like in elizabethean times, thus sex will reach a certain point where doing it for any other purpose besides breeding will be considered a crime against humanity and not allowed by popularity, until it is happening everywhere, every second of the day, no matter where you are, like in Brave New World by aldous huxley

[Shalot]

Shalot, your funny! The whole herpes thing...I'm sorry, I found in entertaining.: Not in a sarcastic way either.

Aw thanks

[Virgil]

What is wrong with being friends-with-benefits or sex buddies?

It's repulsive and of low character, that's what's wrong with it. Would you go around telling your parents, grandparents, and your aunts and uncles and other people who you wish to look at you with respect? Would you go around telling people at work? If that's the kind of esteem you wish to be associated with, then you will be known as sleaze. And it will catch up with you in your life in time. I can't believe so many people said nothing is wrong with it.