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Thread: Poetry Contest

  1. #571
    Our wee Olympic swimmer Janine's Avatar
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    Well, I have read some of these great poetry entries and been quite impressed. I had better post this since I have been working on it for awhile now. Here is my humble attempt. My first entry in the contest. Hope to enter many more times in the future. It was fun to write.



    Aftermath

    Banished, blank, blanched.
    Anticipative eyes stare
    Into pulpless white pages;
    Stark stone’s potential space
    Stares back – waiting.

    Black type, bleached white,
    No trace of inky time,
    No smudge of knowledge,
    All lost forevermore -
    Eradication of all wisdom!

    History purged away,
    Kingdoms crumbled,
    Goverments turned to ash,
    Empires lie pulverized,
    Democracy a dream.

    Statue stubornly stands
    Imitating man, stonecold;
    Behold his empty book
    World’s “past” evaporated.
    Fragments locked in minds?

    World with an end!
    Books burned to embers,
    Art’s ultimate destruction,
    Rare treasures shattered;
    Time, banished, left dustless.

    Keepers of knowledge,
    Curators of cultural realms,
    How did you not notice
    Arts' slow disintegration,
    Dust settling mighty pyramids?

    Is there no trase,
    No particle or tiny cinder?
    No seed to nuture us
    Kindle new knowledge -
    Thoughts to render fresh ink?

    Where shall we begin,
    Seek identity, in history's extinction?
    Can one miraculous speck
    Bring "past" back to blank pages;
    How to begin history anew….

    They weep, emersed in questions
    World stands still as stopped clocks.
    Knoweledge extracted and lost,
    In the rubble of future's fatal hour;
    Ignored we all the warnings.

    Now worlds look on stone tablets,
    Great minds grasp for hidden clues,
    Barely recalled, we see through obscurity -
    Labyrinths of history, timespan recalled
    Man surfaces, past shattered truths.

    Witness history’s total destruction?
    Can the past be recovered;
    Extracted from inward seeing minds?
    Is seed born from flames;
    Can dormant "time" be restored?

    Man grasps at memory eternal -
    For that which a few once knew,
    Recalled in their humanity alone,
    To steer the course of history anew,
    Now glorious "hope" dawns our renewal.
    Last edited by Janine; 02-11-2007 at 06:33 PM.
    "It's so mysterious, the land of tears."

    Chapter 7, The Little Prince ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

  2. #572
    Registered User rintrah's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Riesa View Post
    and can I just say, rintrah, that I absolutely loved this.
    Thank you Riesa. I have just read your wonderful poem, and I am deeply touched by your compliment.
    Now comes the night of Enitharmons joy!
    Who shall I call? Who shall I send?

  3. #573
    in angulo cum libro Petrarch's Love's Avatar
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    Just so that everyone knows, this round of the contest is officially closed. Thanks to all who participated. You all have certainly made my job as judge a tough one. Results will be posted by the end of tomorrow (that's tomorrow, U.S. central time).

    "In rime sparse il suono/ di quei sospiri ond' io nudriva 'l core/ in sul mio primo giovenile errore"~ Francesco Petrarca
    "Follies and nonsense, whims and inconsistencies do divert me, I own, and I laugh at them whenever I can."~ Jane Austen

  4. #574
    Away and away.. Laindessiel's Avatar
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    To supply my Italian hunger, Petrarch, what does your Italian signature mean? I can't do 1+1 on this one. Hehe, I'm not an accomplished translator yet.
    "You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life."


    To go wrong in one's own way is better than to go right in someone else's" - Dostoevksy

  5. #575
    Away and away.. Laindessiel's Avatar
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    Everyone's are marvelous!
    "You have enemies? Good. That means you’ve stood up for something, sometime in your life."


    To go wrong in one's own way is better than to go right in someone else's" - Dostoevksy

  6. #576
    Our wee Olympic swimmer Janine's Avatar
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    Lain, how sweet of you to say that. There sure were a lot of entries. Can't wait to see the winner and the next neat photo to write the poem to.
    "It's so mysterious, the land of tears."

    Chapter 7, The Little Prince ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

  7. #577
    Our wee Olympic swimmer Janine's Avatar
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    Toni, I see your all nighter payed off. Wonderful work and more than two brilliant lines! Glad you completed it. Will say more after the contest ends. Good work, Toni!
    "It's so mysterious, the land of tears."

    Chapter 7, The Little Prince ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

  8. #578
    Registered User Gazette's Avatar
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    Talking Why?

    Maybe not the best but here it is;




    Why is it that we live, what is our motive? Do we only exist to live and breathe, and then leave? Or is there some sort of divine entity in us, and when will we cross over the mortal line and become beings that cannot be harmed by the disappearing time.
    "Where have all the flowers gone?
    Long time passing.
    Where have all the flowers gone?
    Long time ago.
    Where have all the flowers gone?
    The girls have picked them ev'ry one." Part of the song titled "Where have all the flowers gone?" By Pete Seeger and Joe Hickerson 1956-'60.

  9. #579
    what is a cait? thevintagepiper's Avatar
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    I hate time zones I have to go to bed without reading the winning poem.
    [rebelution]-[drorings]-[love]

    don't fall down.

  10. #580
    Halloween!! thefemalemind's Avatar
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    hey guys. what's the new pic and who was the winner?


    tfm
    The~Female~Mind

    In Memory of my father
    Michael A. Botten
    02/18/1975 - 01/09/2007

  11. #581
    Our wee Olympic swimmer Janine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thefemalemind View Post
    hey guys. what's the new pic and who was the winner?


    tfm
    Petrarch has her work cut out for here - there were so many good entries this time. Be patient. She said we would get a winner today. Will be interesting to see the new photo, I agree.
    "It's so mysterious, the land of tears."

    Chapter 7, The Little Prince ~ Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

  12. #582
    in angulo cum libro Petrarch's Love's Avatar
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    Just to feed the suspense, because everyone's expecting my next post to be the contest winner, I'm going to answer Lain's question first.
    To supply my Italian hunger, Petrarch, what does your Italian signature mean? I can't do 1+1 on this one. Hehe, I'm not an accomplished translator yet.
    Lain--My signature is the opening lines from the first sonnet of Petrarch's Canzoniere, also known as the Rime Sparse because of this opening line. It translates roughly as "in scattered rimes the sound/ Of those sighs with which I fed the heart/ In my first youthful error." Here's a link to the whole poem with translation: http://petrarch.petersadlon.com/canzoniere.html

    "In rime sparse il suono/ di quei sospiri ond' io nudriva 'l core/ in sul mio primo giovenile errore"~ Francesco Petrarca
    "Follies and nonsense, whims and inconsistencies do divert me, I own, and I laugh at them whenever I can."~ Jane Austen

  13. #583
    in angulo cum libro Petrarch's Love's Avatar
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    And now, having got my students' papers graded, I've had a chance to finish agonizing over the winner of this contest (no easy task). First a few comments to each:

    dramasnot (“The Bibliophile”)—I think all we readers can identify with desperately seeking that desired book and then getting lost in it when it’s found (why is it that the book you want always seems to be at the top of the library shelf, so you have to get one of those little step stools and…I digress). Nice rhyme, and I like some of your phrases: “armed with sight,” and your “1,000 page angel.”

    Pendragon
    (“The Open Book”)—Another sonnet from the maestro. I like the idea of the pages being blank so that each person reads his or her own truth into them, just like life. I especially liked the final couplet.

    mir (untitled)—Good rhyming poem. I like the line “deify the daily grind,” and the call to not just read but to write at the end of the poem.

    Triskele (“Challenge of Word”)—Very nice. The words have a strong sound and a natural flow. These lines particularly stood out to me:
    growls and screams of rage echo across worlds
    decades of gnarled growth, shattered by the ink
    smooth curves and dots fight the red stains of blood
    who now dares to stand, neath the tall blank book
    I like the contrast of the smooth curve of the lines with the rough deeds and history that they record. Good ending too.

    Neil Thomas
    (“Swell of Spring’s Night Sweet Sadness”)—A nicely written poem with a lyrical lilt to it, but I’m not sure how it connects with the picture for this round of the contest. Maybe you just didn’t know how this thread works? We write on a different picture each week.

    Will Press (“Mercury Rises”)—Very nice poem, with an even meter, and a strong sound. Your penultimate line, “Men free to rise or free to sink,” reminds me of the line in Paradise Lost: “Sufficient to have stood though free to fall” (P.L. 3.99). Were you consciously channeling Milton, or was that by chance?

    Lil Stras (“Truth”)—A nice prosy poetry. I like these lines especially:
    paint this blank canvas full.
    Of dark and bright and in between,
    colors that make a beautiful world.
    Pensive (Untitled)—I like the story you’ve imagined behind the creation of a book. Love the repeated line at the end. It really brings together with an emotional impact.

    thevintagepiper (untitled)—I like the rhythm of your short lines and your use of anaphora. My favorite part is the end, though:
    Or perhaps what he shows
    Is merely the flyleaf
    Of some great and
    Beautiful work.

    Orionsbelt
    (untitled)—Beautiful rhythm to this one, and I liked the theme of divine inspiration. I love the phrase “Midwived by thunder,” and I like the ending question, “How shall we call you?” Nice.

    Barneythebear (“Music that Speaks with Accents)—A very nice love poem, but I don’t think it goes with the contest picture. All the same, I like the way you handle the music conceit. Parts of it sound like imitation of old love poems, like those by Donne.

    Virgil (“The Point of Hinge”)—This is an interesting one. I like the sense of the eternal pivot, the points on which the book and the world hinge. The last line feels like a bit of a non sequiter, but in a delightfully absurd and fascinating way.

    Susan Sonnen (Untitled)—I like the simple delight of this one. It has an understated charm about it. I like the inviting imperative of the final line.

    rintrah (Untitled)—An elegant, lyrical narrative. It’s like a combination of a real world story about storytelling, and a mystic vision. I love the whole stanza with the “ocean” of books, especially these lines:
    Floating folios spewing their ink onto the gravel
    Mixing the tide-spill with hushed voices and dead thoughts
    Thought no more by dead men
    and the ending brings us back wonderfully to the connection between the poetry and the prose, so to speak.

    toni
    (”Slave of the Spine”)—Some really interesting descriptions here. I like the “revelations,/ knocking on the surface that once were flapping tides,” and the “pages of lips.” The ending has an almost fairtale-like quality to it, especially the final line “The immortal—Slave of the Spine.” Glad you finished it in time to submit.

    Riesa
    (Untitled)—As always your words have a graceful and distinctive sound to them. I think my favorite stanza is the third one:
    As winds carve the ripening clouds
    painters spill and leisured lovers drift
    on waves of deepened honey
    against the canvas’ pale skin they melt
    unraveling inner boundaries
    Beautiful. The only thing that bugged me was in the second stanza where you never seem to find an object for the following:
    inside the huddling timid,
    peering ever sideways down
    and never fixing forward.
    Maybe it’s just the English teacher in me, but I kept wondering what was huddling, timid, peering etc. Overall I enjoyed it though.

    Janine
    (Aftermath)—I’m glad you slipped this one in at the last minute, Janine (almost literally the midnight hour I think), since I enjoyed reading it. Lots of interesting ideas coming out here. I think I like the first stanza the best for its alliteration and description.

    "In rime sparse il suono/ di quei sospiri ond' io nudriva 'l core/ in sul mio primo giovenile errore"~ Francesco Petrarca
    "Follies and nonsense, whims and inconsistencies do divert me, I own, and I laugh at them whenever I can."~ Jane Austen

  14. #584
    in angulo cum libro Petrarch's Love's Avatar
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    And now you’re all wondering who won. As you can see from the list above, there were quite a number of entries this round. All of the writers are undoubtedly talented and I was really torn between some when making a decision. So many wonderful poems, how is one to choose?! That said, I’ve decided in favor of Rintrah’s poem:
    I walked up on some bright evening
    The sounds of the village in my ears,
    Voices prickling with the intensity
    Of old men, making good their promise
    To not go gently into the night,
    The hush of the heavens above my head
    A few arrayed stars marking out
    The bounds of men, the faint
    Glistening edge of the sun
    Making the presence of the world
    Seem thin and narrow, a squinted
    Place, an awkward squinted place
    And I drew in the air, clearing my
    Head, and I thought of the man
    Who once told me that the last
    Thing the world needs is another book,
    he, trim-framed and arrogant,
    Placing himself as a the solution to
    His own pointless problem

    And I thought of the volumes and pages
    That dot the sky like stars, endless, seemingly
    Like an ocean of men’s ideas and women’s thoughts
    The crashing of waves, clusters of cloistered keepsakes
    Bookends washing up on the shore by the harbour,
    Floating folios spewing their ink onto the gravel
    Mixing the tide-spill with hushed voices and dead thoughts
    Thought no more by dead men

    And I wondered if there was just one book, only one
    A drawstring that pulls us in, makes us fit.
    I sat up there for some time, and said
    It's just one book, its all one book.
    I made my way back down, stumbling in the
    Evening light, hearing the men again talking
    Their way through life, laughing at old Evans
    When he lost his way home and slept in Geraint's
    Shed, they slapped their legs and the
    Table and howled, and I said, I think you
    should write that down.
    Congrats Rintrah, and we’ll look forward to seeing the picture you select for the next round.

    "In rime sparse il suono/ di quei sospiri ond' io nudriva 'l core/ in sul mio primo giovenile errore"~ Francesco Petrarca
    "Follies and nonsense, whims and inconsistencies do divert me, I own, and I laugh at them whenever I can."~ Jane Austen

  15. #585
    what is a cait? thevintagepiper's Avatar
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    Congratulations Rintrah! It's lovely. I love how it has quite a story in it...
    [rebelution]-[drorings]-[love]

    don't fall down.

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