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Thread: Litnet's version of Devil's dictionary

  1. #2386
    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
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    Sieve: One of the holiest things in a kitchen. (rimshot!)


    Holy:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  2. #2387
    Maybe YesNo's Avatar
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    Holy: Something full of holes, like the ego of a saintly person that has become so diaphanous, so not-there, that his or her bliss shines through making the rest of us wonder what in hell is stopping us from doing the same.

    Diaphanous:

  3. #2388
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    Diaphanous: Translucent, jawbreaker words for "see through" as in "see through" blouse

    Jawbreaker:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  4. #2389
    Registered User tailor STATELY's Avatar
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    Jaw Breaker:

    • One who emulates those soldier guys who crack nuts à la "The Nutcracker" (or "Jaws" from the James Bond series)
    • Malicious candy invented by dentists (yeah - the same ones who hand out toothbrushes at Halloween); usually sold in gumball type machines

    Toothbrush:
    tailor

    who am I but a stitch in time
    what if I were to bare my soul
    would you see me origami

    7-8-2015

  5. #2390
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Toothbrush: Something South Koreans apparently use every five minutes. In their schools, the kids each have a tiny toothbrush locker in the restrooms for use after lunch. They are the most tooth lovin' culture this side of Transylvania.

    YesNo: Your comment re: holy really impressed me.

    Scobberlotcher:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  6. #2391
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    Scobberlotcher: One who drools a lot due to extreme laziness, usually while loafing in a public place thereby driving away any value people gain by visiting said place. For example our town built a trail along the river for exercise hikers. But it's also near the railroad and hobos camp in the area. These people are Scobberlotching, and it makes the trail dangerous at times.

    Steampunk:
    Last edited by Pendragon; 10-11-2015 at 06:58 AM.
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  7. #2392
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tyrion Cheddar View Post
    YesNo: Your comment re: holy really impressed me.
    Thanks, Tyrion Cheddar!

    Steampunk: A metallic fascination with the mechanistic 19th century.

    19th century:

  8. #2393
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    The setting for many a great whodunit, retro history Netflix series, and steampunk novel; the birthplace of serial killing; the time when steam and coal were harnessed to produce electricity; the time when Victoria's peers owned all the land and the underclass worked it, when not carrying hot water up flights of stairs for said gentry's baths; and, I dare say, twas the age of gothic literature--whence comes the term 'goth'--as well as tuberculosis, all leading to a lot of kids in dark clothes and pale make-up dancing to The Cure.

    Wraith:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  9. #2394
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    Wraith: A mysterious, ghost-like creature some don’t believe in and so avoid taking unreasonable, superstitious precautions against like those who do not believe in car crashes and so avoid the precaution of fastening their seat belts until it is too late.

    Seat Belt:

  10. #2395
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    Seat Belt: A restraint now enforced by law. punishable by a fine, although I somehow have made it to the thresh hold of 55 and spent probably half without ever using a seat belt. We used to pile everyone into a car or van and go on long trips with kids seated on the laps of grown ups who had no seat belt. We also sat in folding chairs in the back of vans when the seats weren't even fastened to the floor! Not to mention riding in the backs of pickup trucks, setting on the edge or standing and trying to keep balanced! By today's thinking, I should have died during my twenties!

    Balanced:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  11. #2396
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    Balanced: Being temperate in one’s choices so one diversifies and doesn’t go to extremes such as when one is eating it is healthier to pick selections from all the food groups rather than restricting oneself to only those foods that one likes. For example, it is more balanced for lunch to consist of diversified servings of chocolate as well as vanilla ice cream, say, three scoops of each, rather than six scoops of chocolate ice cream followed by six scoops of vanilla ice cream.

    Diversification:
    Last edited by YesNo; 10-12-2015 at 12:08 AM.

  12. #2397
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    Diversification: To spread one's taste, money, or habits across a broad band of products. A diverse diet means that you are not restricted in any way, such as being a vegan. A diverse investment portfolio means you own stock in several companies, or invest in bonds, entrepreneurship, and precious metals. Diverse habits can mean you a both a drunk and a dope addict, and probably smoke as well.

    Uncertain Sound:
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  13. #2398
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Uncertain sound: a shuffling and a rasping outside the screen door, heard while standing at the kitchen sink with a glass of water, moonlight through the smaller swaying branches of the cherry tree, barren in winter's icy grip, dancing across the droplets in the sink. Could be swirling leaves. Probably a walker.

    Oh ****:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

  14. #2399
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    Oh ****: When this happens it is usually a sign that someone has flushed the toilet and down below, deep in the depths, at the end of the line, waiting impatiently, there is a demon with a funny grin on his (or her) face who has just turned on the fan.

    Steppenwolf:

  15. #2400
    Registered User Tyrion Cheddar's Avatar
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    Steppenwolf: Possibly the greatest novel I've ever read. Certainly the most personal, the one that spoke to my soul as if written for me. It gave me relief in that it made me feel understood, represented, and given voice.

    Hairy:
    Obsessed with facial symmetry.

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