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Thread: Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

  1. #6196
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    It was only because of a train journey I took about 10 years ago that I discovered the true identity of the writer of all those Beatle's hits. It was a bloke called John from Castleford who sat next to me travelling from Blackpool to Halifax. After penning such hits as Love Me Do and She Loves You Yeah Yeah Yeah and then going on to more experimental stuff like Lucy (John's wife)In The Sky With Diamond (John's cat ) Paul MaCartney promised him he would see him right by leaving him the Island of Mull in his will. It was probably the most entertaining train journey I had ever been on. The last thing John mentioned was a trip he'd taken to London in the 60's where he'd seen a tramp in a cafe. "And that's how I came to write Streets of London by Ralph MacTell"he said.
    Haha. I made it a rule never to completely trust anyone from Castleford, though at that time I used to mainly know miners. (An unruly lot at the best of times).

    The bus and train - unless you're on a crammed one - is quite relaxing. That is until some person starts with the inconsequential phone call at full volume. On our way to Manchester last year there was a guy on the coach who kept phoning different people up and telling them the same thing. Those with head-phones donned them, whilst the rest of us spent the trip looking round and and raising our eyebrows at each other in that resigned "there's always one" kind of way. I had to snigger when he kept telling people of him ringing Sharon, but that she never answered.

  2. #6197
    Clinging to Douvres rocks Gilliatt Gurgle's Avatar
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    After reading about Mr. Orifice, I couldn't help but think of Goldmember and his dead skin.
    Anyhow, I was on a bus trip a couple years back during which two audible tween 4-H girls were carrying on about animal husbandry, spending the better part of that conversation on methods for studding goats and pigs.
    "Mongo only pawn in game of life" - Mongo

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKRma7PDW10

  3. #6198
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paulclem View Post
    Haha. I made it a rule never to completely trust anyone from Castleford, though at that time I used to mainly know miners. (An unruly lot at the best of times).
    I remember walking up Wheldon Road on match days, swapping jewels of wit and subtle repartee with residents of that fair borough.
    ay up

  4. #6199
    Clinging to Douvres rocks Gilliatt Gurgle's Avatar
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    Been listening to the Flying Burrito Brothers
    Here's a Blokes theme song for the day...

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6bmcT4qieI4

    .
    "Mongo only pawn in game of life" - Mongo

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKRma7PDW10

  5. #6200
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    I remember walking up Wheldon Road on match days, swapping jewels of wit and subtle repartee with residents of that fair borough.
    I can easily imagine.

    Quite a few of the team we played for - Wakefield Trinity Colts - came from Castleford, and I think they had no end of trouble with their local peers. They regularly told us about fights in their nightclub - The Kiosk, (a fine place which I visited once). I think they were regarded as traitors. Worse still, one went on to play for Leeds and another one Bradford. They were a bit handy though, and you could expect a saloon bar brawl if you went out with them - which we did in Blackpool. (Missed the brawl though).

    Never heard of the Burrito Brothers Gilliatt, but watching the vid led me on to read about Gram Parsons - fascinating if tragic stuff.

  6. #6201
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
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    So I've suddenly acquired a greenhouse. At 10.15 this morning I had no greenhouse. At 10.45 I had one. A neighbour saw me on the street and asked if I still had the allotment to which I replied I had. He then asked if i would like a greenhouse. The vision of an aluminium frame with panes of glass was gradually modified to a plastic put together frame with plastic glass. "Ok" I thought. "Glass is bad on an allotment as it often gets broken in high winds." I said I'd call round and take a look sometime and went happily off with the dog. Just after getting home the doorbell went and the neighbour had brought round the instructions and some small parts and announced that it was ready to take.

    So I went round and gathered up the very numerous parts of the put together greenhouse, which, without a good diagram, would be a nightmare to put up. Luckily I have the instructions. The reason for his sudden keen ness to divest himself of the greenhouse then became apparent. His wife had been nagging him to get rid of it.

    So it is now stuffed down the side of our house waiting for action. I wonder if I'll get round to it this year?

  7. #6202
    www.markbastable.co.uk
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paulclem View Post
    So I've suddenly acquired a greenhouse. At 10.15 this morning I had no greenhouse. At 10.45 I had one. A neighbour saw me on the street and asked if I still had the allotment to which I replied I had. He then asked if i would like a greenhouse. The vision of an aluminium frame with panes of glass was gradually modified to a plastic put together frame with plastic glass. "Ok" I thought. "Glass is bad on an allotment as it often gets broken in high winds." I said I'd call round and take a look sometime and went happily off with the dog. Just after getting home the doorbell went and the neighbour had brought round the instructions and some small parts and announced that it was ready to take.

    So I went round and gathered up the very numerous parts of the put together greenhouse, which, without a good diagram, would be a nightmare to put up. Luckily I have the instructions. The reason for his sudden keen ness to divest himself of the greenhouse then became apparent. His wife had been nagging him to get rid of it.

    So it is now stuffed down the side of our house waiting for action. I wonder if I'll get round to it this year?
    I'm holding a fiver that says it'll still be stacked in the side return come Easter.

  8. #6203
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarkBastable View Post
    I'm holding a fiver that says it'll still be stacked in the side return come Easter.
    Yes. As I was stuffing it away I was thinking - "Oh no! What have I done?". He did rush away grinning and rubbing his hands.

  9. #6204
    Pièce de Résistance Scheherazade's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarkBastable View Post
    I'm holding a fiver that says it'll still be stacked in the side return come Easter.
    I have a great faith in Mrs Clem's persuasion powers. I'll put a tenner that she will make sure they are not stacked there by Easter.
    ~
    "It is not that I am mad; it is only that my head is different from yours.”
    ~


  10. #6205
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    I think it'll be gone by tomato planting time.
    ay up

  11. #6206
    running amok Sancho's Avatar
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    El Sancho wants in on some of this action. I’ve got a Jackson (a twenty) that says the greenhouse is up by the next equinox.

    My advice: throw away the instructions (they’re confusing and evil) and get yourself a couple of rolls of this stuff:

    If you can’t fix it – Duck it.
    Uhhhh...

  12. #6207
    Clinging to Douvres rocks Gilliatt Gurgle's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Paulclem View Post
    ...So it is now stuffed down the side of our house waiting for action. I wonder if I'll get round to it this year?
    I’ll bet my copy of the Old Farmer’s Almanac he’ll have it up by the next harvest moon.
    It will make a nice addition to Paul’s field of folly’s complimenting the Ivy League sheds.

    Remember this: (post 4728)

    http://www.online-literature.com/for...hread!/page316

    .


    Quote Originally Posted by Sancho View Post
    El Sancho wants in on some of this action. I’ve got a Jackson (a twenty) that says the greenhouse is up by the next equinox.

    My advice: throw away the instructions (they’re confusing and evil) and get yourself a couple of rolls of this stuff:
    [img]
    If you can’t fix it – Duck it.
    Leave it to Sancho to bring us back around to the Duct vs Duck contrivesy.
    "Mongo only pawn in game of life" - Mongo

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKRma7PDW10

  13. #6208
    running amok Sancho's Avatar
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    Yep. You know, since that controversy, I’ve learned the etymology behind “Duck Tape”: it is so called because it is a Cloth Tape, and the type of cloth that the gooey stuff is infused into is – Ta Da – Duck Cloth.

    Anyway, once again, aluminum tape is better for duct work. Duck Tape leaves behind a messy residue that’ll require another fine product remove it from the ductwork: “Goof Off.” (gasoline works too, but be sure to snuff out your cigarette first.)

    So then, concerning Paul’s construction project, and considering that it’s an unnatural act for a man to use a set of instructions, El Sancho has a solution. In fact, I’ve recently tossed all the shop manuals in my garage and replaced them with this simple yet effective wall chart:
    Uhhhh...

  14. #6209
    Pièce de Résistance Scheherazade's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    I think it'll be gone by tomato planting time.
    I will take that but just to be clear when does one plant tomatoes?

    Quote Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle View Post
    Also, Gilliatt should get a special mention for remembering what Paul mentioned 1500 posts ago (more than 1.5 years ago).

    Sancho ~ We follow a similar action plan in my household as well... Only that WD-40 and the Duck Tape are replaced with this:

    ~
    "It is not that I am mad; it is only that my head is different from yours.”
    ~


  15. #6210
    running amok Sancho's Avatar
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    Ah yes, Scher’, we’ve got one of those too.

    Also we have one of these, which is where my furniture building projects usually wind up:
    Uhhhh...

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