Happy belated birthday, Silent! 
An interview with SilentMute:
*Why are we doing this interview thing?*
I don’t want to be left out. My mom filled out one, and I couldn’t wait until I had my interview.
*So, how old are you?*
37, though many people still think I’m a young adult. I’m still getting chased by pedophiles at an age where I should have outgrown them.
*If you had a personal theme song what would it be?*
I guess I’d steal the “Nepal” theme for Tombraider Legends. It is sad, hinting at some tragedy, and yet it is also calming—reminding you nothing matters in the sands of time.
*Are you male or female?
Female…the last time I checked anyway.*
*If you owned the site, what would you change?*
I’d pay those hard-working summary writers a lot more. *cough,cough* *hint, hint.
*What was the inspiration for your LitNet username? And if you could change it today, what would you pick?*
I got into a horrible fight on another forum that upset me so much, I vowed I would look on forums but never participate in the threads. We can see that didn’t last long. Another username…ummm…StillGrowingUp.
*Which countries have you visited?*
None. Though the art and history can be appealing, I don’t like peeing blood when I drink water and getting dysentery from my food.
*Which languages do you speak?*
American English. I’ve been trying to learn Spanish for ages, but my brain rebels against rapidly spoken languages.
*If you could live somewhere different, where would it be and why?*
I’m happy where I am. I’ve got roots, having lived in the same house since I was four years old. I know where everything is. I prefer the weather to other climates.
*Have you heard the news today, oh boy?*
Nope. I never listen to the news. It is either depressing or stupid, which is not good for my mindset. Besides, it also keeps me safe from the mind control machine’s subliminal messages ordering me to watch “The Bachelor” and “Jersey Shore.”
*Do you have any pets?*
A pain in the butt (but I still love him) cat named Pissandmoan.
*What makes you happy?*
Hiding the bodies so the police can’t find them until that incriminating evidence washes away or deteriorates. (he-he. Joking). Actually, it is pretty easy to make me happy. A beautiful day, making a sale, a good video game or horror movie, a good book, being under a fuzzy blanket on a cold day, accomplishing a task—all these things and more make me happy.
*Do you take yourself too seriously, or not seriously enough?*
I think I’ve achieved a happy medium.
*Do you feel comfortable in your walk with God/atheism? *
Yes. I’m a spiritual person, though a bad childhood experience has made me wary of organized religions.*
*Which actor should play you in a movie based on your life?*
Dakota Fanning, even though she looks nothing like me
*Who is your favourite Beatle?*
George
*How do you like your coffee? *
Don’t like it. I prefer Coke in the morning and throughout the day—the beverage, not the snorting kind.
*Given the option, what animal would you choose to be?*
I’m happy being human, but if I had to choose—anything that has a decent life span and isn’t edible
*How is your reading year going?*
Great! Though I do it more for money than pleasure these days.
*What did you want to be when you grew up?*
Egyptologist.
*What's the biggest fish you've ever caught?*
It keeps getting bigger every time I tell the tale. I’d say it was about the size of my house.
*What makes you feel great about yourself?*
Accomplishing something, no matter how silly or trivial. I love checking something off on my to-do list, even if it is washing the dishes. I love accomplishing something I failed at the first time I did it—even something silly like a video game.
*How did you meet your significant other?*
Don’t have one. Don’t expect I ever will. I find myself getting set in my ways as I get older and am more unwilling to compromise. I like being in full control of the TV remote, even if I’m not watching TV.
*What are you naturally good at? (Skills, abilities, gifts etc.)*
I was blessed with many talents and skills, and what I regret is that I don’t know if I always put them to good use. I’m good at writing and drawing. I’m good at sculpting. I’m a good teacher. I’m a good seller. I have leadership ability, though I hate being a leader.
*What is the one thing you must do before you die?*
There is nothing that important. Besides, I believe in reincarnation. If I don’t do it in this life, I’ll do it in the next one.
*If you had to teach something, what would you teach?*
Languages—but I’d have to learn them first. However, I do tutor English for ESOL students.
*What would you regret not fully doing, being or having in your life?*
I don’t regret anything. Even if I cringe at a memory, every choice and experience has taught me something eventually. I’m wiser for it.
*If you were to be stuck at a particular time in your life, which one would you choose and why?*
The thirties! They have been spectacular! However, I would hope I’d never get stuck in time. Though I dread the insanity and breaking down of older ages, I want to continue the adventure.
*What book would you say sums you up?
I identify with “The Lovely Bones” by Alice Sebold—even though I’m not dead. However, a bad thing happens to the heroine, for a long time it consumes her, her family gets broken up, but eventually she becomes wiser and grows. Her family also mends.
*What method do you cherish above all others, as means to improving your life?*
Patience. If you wait long enough, everything sorts out.
*What one thing would you NEED to have on a deserted island if you didn't have to worry over food and water? *
A computer with internet service. I could keep myself entertained, and also write emails to the coast guard saying, “Seriously, get me off this effing island! They are taping the “The Bachelor” next door, and I’m about to be incited to commit murder!
*If you were a king/queen for a day, what would you do?*
Probably keeping a sharp eye on that sword dangling over my head and refusing to partake of anything—and praying the day will be over soon.
*What’s the stupidest forum argument you’ve ever had?*
I’ve had a lot of stupid forum arguments, but if we are sticking to LitNet…probably the argument I had when I said that I thought Jane Austen sucked donkey balls as a writer—and the man who rewrote her books and added zombies was a wonderful genius. Since then, I have learned not to diss Jane Austen—even though I still hate her as an author.
*What song is in your head at the moment?*
“Colors of the Wind.” We just bought a Disney Pocahontas doll to sell. Unfortunately, this one is defective. My mom thinks she is singing the first three words of “Colors of the Wind.” I’m not sure if someone isn’t playing a practical joke, for it sounds like to me she is saying either “You take me” or “You shake me” over and over again.
*Which book are you reading at the moment?*
I’m reading two books—Oliver Twist by Charles Dickens and Don Quixote by Cervantes.
*What is your favourite quote?*
A mistake is another way of doing things. (I don’t remember who said it).
*Which comedians or cabaret artists do you like?*
Wanda Sykes, the guy that does Achmed the Terrorist, Jeff Foxworthy and his friends (Get-her-done Mater guy and Tater).
*Favorite avatar on the Forum?*
Well, I’m partial to mine. However, I always like Scher’s avatars, and I missed Paulclem’s Frankenstein when he changed it for a day.
*Favorite threads?*
My attention span is not long enough to have a favorite. I spend a lot of time in the hidden Writer’s Lounge posting summaries for the books I’m reading. I guess I do like birthday threads.
*What's your favorite sandwich?*
If it is a sandwich—roast beef. If we can include subs—I still like roast beef—but I also like meatball subs and Philly steaks.
*What is your answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe, and everything?*?
I’m right.
*Who are some of the nicest people you met on LitNet?*
I’ve met many nice people. I have people I talk to most, but I often forget how to spell their names. I probably don’t want to mention individuals, because I might hurt the feelings of other good friends if I neglect to mention them.
*What is the limit of your credibility?*
I’m very credible, except when I drink a half bottle of Nyquil (which I stopped doing around eight years old—or rather my mom stopped me from doing when she stopped buying it). Back then, the pink flying lobster and the deranged nine foot Easter bunny claimed they wouldn’t trust me much—particularly the Easter Bunny, who thought I had sexually harassed him when I grabbed his butt.
*What is the title of your next book?*
Mr. Larson Buys a Farm. (A lame title, I know, but it is a children’s book…so it is okay)
*Favorite poem?*
I think it was called “Uncharted”, and I thought it was by Emily Dickenson—but I can’t find it, so I’m not sure. Anyway, it is a poem about that a person knows a wave even if they never saw the sea, and so they know Heaven exists—as if a map was given.
*First novel you remember reading on your own?*
Well, I guess it depends on the definition of novel. The first book I read on my own probably was Ramona Quimby, Age 8. However, I don’t know if that counts as a novel. The first novel would probably be The Twelfth Transforming by Pauline Gedge. I was so impressed with myself for finishing it—for it was a small paperback and had six hundred pages. The other kids were impressed too—and showed their admiration by tormenting me.
*What era do you find most of the books you read are from?*
Mostly twentieth century authors—and modern ones at that.
*Favorite TV shows?*
V, Star Wars The Clone Wars. Every so often, I like to watch Criminal Minds or Medium.
*Which Forum members would you like to meet in person?*
I’m rather happy keeping things online. I’m sure you are all charming people, but I am basically a loner.
*Last words you said out loud?*
What do you think she meant by “What is the limit of your credibility”?
*Last person you hugged/kissed?*
Mom
*What do you do (for a living) to be able to keep your LitNet addiction going? And are you happy with your chosen profession?*
I’m a summary writer for LitNet. I’m also trying to become a papier mache artist and a successful online seller. I’m happy with all three and hope to be successful. I realized it would be better for me to be my own boss—or at least keep an online relationship with a boss. I just don’t like kissing butt and exclaiming it tastes like chocolate when it really tastes like @#*%.
*What would you like to be if you could change your profession?*
Wife and mother
*Which one of the seven dwarves are you and why?*
I can’t even name all the dwarves…but I don’t really want to compare myself to a bunch of grimey, short men who don’t like to take baths.
*What is your most outstanding feature?*
My eyes
*If you could change one thing about the way you look, what would that be?*
I would like to not have scoliosis.
*Which book do you wish you had written?*
Star Wars—particularly if I got the revenues for all the toys, collectibles, books, and movies.
*What book would you recommend to others of all types and ages as a must read?*
Well, it is rather hard to recommend a book for all ages. I generally recommend “The Lovely Bones” by Alice Sebold.
*What should you be doing at the moment instead of answering these questions?*
Eating breakfast and starting my day.
]*If Pensive were a gloomy clown, what would you be?*
Not Pensive. I don’t want to be gloomy, and I loathe clowns. (Sorry, Pensive).
*Describe your ideal day, please.*
There is food in the fridge, the laundry is done, someone bids on a high-priced item, the customer is not insane, and I have no technical issues with the computer.
*Favorite movie?*
The Grudge
*Last movie you watched?
The Grudge 3
[*How are you going to pick just one favourite painting?*
Pretty easily. I don’t have many.
Do you want to buy a banana?
As long as it doesn’t have brown spots—though I’d prefer to get it for free.
*Favorite painting?*
I thought it was called “The Leaf Burners”, but I’m not sure. I don’t remember who it is by. It shows some children on what looks like an autumn night around a fire burning leaves.
Bowie, yay or nay?
Used to be yay (I thought he was hot in that movie Labyrinth), but now it is nay (tastes change)
*Wonderful Superman or depressing Batman?*
Batman. Though I really prefer Lara Croft or Diana from the old series of “V”
*Something you want to forget but you never can?*
My teenage years
*If you could relive one moment in your life whenever you wanted to, what would it be?*
I had many nice moments, but I don’t really care to relive any of them.
*What is the best thing that happened to you since your last birthday?*
I discovered papier mache and the fact that I’m a good seller
*If you could send one thing to the Room 101, one would that be?*
Nothing! Do I look like I’m from Room Service?
*Are you mostly happy with life or are you still in pursuit?*
I’m happy—though I’m still trying to pursue a career and become independent.
*Tell us something scandalous about yourself.*
I’ve been banned from one forum and left another before I got banned.
*How long did it take you to answer all of these questions?*
Two days.
*Are you currently intoxicated?*
Nope—unless my neighbor’s glue sniffing is affecting me without realizing it.
*When will you pay Whifflingpin?*
Who and what is a Whifflingpin? Does he sell on Ebay? I’ll pay him as soon as the auction ends, of course!
*One final word of wisdom for LitNet users?*
Stop fighting about things nobody can prove anyway. Scher just closes the thread, and if that happens too often, we might be stuck only talking about books…and who wants to do that…on a literature site?
*What question would you like to ask to the person to be interview after you?*
A lawyer has a brother who is a police man, but the police man doesn’t have a brother who is a lawyer. How can that be?
Originally Posted by SilentMute
Actually, my province is reported to have the best potable water in the country
Anyway, I guess I'm bad at this sort of language riddles
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