Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

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Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle

Well, judging from your typed mood, it sounds like you are breathing a sigh of relief. Being young as she is, the bones should mend up quickly.

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Yeah, she's up and about now, with no problems.

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Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle

When you say "sheet", I take that to mean plywood aka splinter board! especially at edges and corners.

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Bingo! Nice sharp machined edge.

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Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle

Thank God (did I say that?) he didn't get a splinter in the eye!

Now they will have some great battle scars to share with their mates and stories to stretch.
Unfortunatly, your girls' holiday week is shot.

Gilliatt

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Ours or hers?

Now, she's going to be here all day, which certainly ruins mine!

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Originally Posted by OrphanPip

Losing an eye terrifies me, a perforated eyeball is one of the grosses things I've ever seen, that and teeth getting pulled makes my skin crawl.

I once got bit in the face by a dog at the shelter, when I was working with abused animals, and I was cut on the eyebrow and right below my eye. Imagine having your eye torn out by a dog. I don't know what compelled me to stay on there for another 2 years.

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I've seen one of those and it ain't pretty!

Nightmare hols Atheist. One of the worst sounds I find around the house is the bump bump bumpity bump down the stairs.

That might be from when I overbalanced at the top with the 9 month old clutched in my arms, and I had to run down to keep my feet. I don't know how I managed. Terrible when the kids get hurt.

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Originally Posted by Paulclem

Nightmare hols Atheist. One of the worst sounds I find around the house is the bump bump bumpity bump down the stairs.

That might be from when I overbalanced at the top with the 9 month old clutched in my arms, and I had to run down to keep my feet. I don't know how I managed. Terrible when the kids get hurt.

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Stairs & kids are a bad mix at the best of times!

Christ, one thing that's been an absolute epidemic over here - and Australia - is people running kids over in driveways.

How the hell would that feel? Driving over your toddler?

Mostly due to idiots that think a gigantic 4WD is "safer", it seems.

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

Cor blimey! What a couple of days.

This week is the first of NZ's spring school holidays, so the terrible two go their different ways to friends' houses to play.

3.15 Monday, daughter arrives home in a car unexpectedly. The mum whose house she'd been at explained that she'd fallen off the scooter and hurt her arm.

Hurt ended up being a bit short of the reality!

She'd managed to break both bones in her right arm. Taking a tumble off the scooter, she had somehow managed to land on the top of the bone on your outer wrist, right at the end of the ulna.

Both bones snapped clean in half about an inch from the hand end of her arm bones!

Monday night wasn't much fun with little sleep for either me or her - daddy, of course, had to sleep on the floor to be right there next to her. Daddy's bloody back did not enjoy that experience!

Last night, as I type, she's still asleep and has been for about 8 hours, so daddy's managed to not only get some kip, but in an actual bed!

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How awful, poor Baje, didn't she just get over a knee injury? How is your back? I used to spend the nights at hospitals with Mr Sounds, but I was much younger; I don't think I could manage it now...don't they even have a nice soft chair for you?

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Originally Posted by Paulclem

Nightmare hols Atheist. One of the worst sounds I find around the house is the bump bump bumpity bump down the stairs.

That might be from when I overbalanced at the top with the 9 month old clutched in my arms, and I had to run down to keep my feet. I don't know how I managed. Terrible when the kids get hurt.

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You aren't kidding. When Jess was a toddler, she started walking down the steps of our apartment building; I was afraid she was going to fall so I picked her up (I was in 3 inch heels on wet cement steps), tumbled down 16 steps and she was knocked out. I was in shock; I couldn't move or think. When I took her to the hospital they laughed it off, "Kids bounce" they said.

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Originally Posted by soundofmusic

How awful, poor Baje, didn't she just get over a knee injury? How is your back? I used to spend the nights at hospitals with Mr Sounds, but I was much younger; I don't think I could manage it now...don't they even have a nice soft chair for you?

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No hospital, just at home, and no, we don't have chairs and the couch won't fit in her room.

Everyone's AOK now, though.

Here is the famous double-broken arm!

You can clearly see the kink close to the wrist where the bone doubled over. I can tell from looking at it that that hurt!

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s...heist/arm2.jpg

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Originally Posted by soundofmusic

You aren't kidding. When Jess was a toddler, she started walking down the steps of our apartment building; I was afraid she was going to fall so I picked her up (I was in 3 inch heels on wet cement steps), tumbled down 16 steps and she was knocked out. I was in shock; I couldn't move or think. When I took her to the hospital they laughed it off, "Kids bounce" they said.

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Horrible. It makes me squirm.

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

No hospital, just at home, and no, we don't have chairs and the couch won't fit in her room.

Everyone's AOK now, though.

Here is the famous double-broken arm!

You can clearly see the kink close to the wrist where the bone doubled over. I can tell from looking at it that that hurt!

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I'm hurting just looking at it. Well, you're sure a good dad sleeping next to her bed...
My chairs are 30 years old; 2 gave out from under me and I've got them in my room, hoping to put them back together...the dowels gave way.

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Originally Posted by Paulclem

Horrible. It makes me squirm.

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No kidding; I could never go through parenthood again; I'd have a heart attack on the stairs at this age. :angelsad2:

Did I scare you guys with my new avatar?:alien:

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Originally Posted by soundofmusic

Did I scare you guys with my new avatar?:alien:

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Not scared but speechless in the presence of such beauty.
A face that launched a thousand Gulf shrimp boats.

Serously, whoever that is, she is lovely.


Gilliatt

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

Christ, one thing that's been an absolute epidemic over here - and Australia - is people running kids over in driveways.

How the hell would that feel? Driving over your toddler?

Mostly due to idiots that think a gigantic 4WD is "safer", it seems.

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I'm not sure if you are aware of this, but there was terrible news recently from China. A man ran over a boy with his car four times, and then tried to run off.
If you want to know more about this incident, here it is on a blog on China:
http://wtdevflnt.wordpress.com/2010/...raphic-photos/

I would advise against looking at the video. It is very disturbing. No one really did anything about the incident when it happened, and the images are sickening. But it did happen.

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Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle

Not scared but speechless in the presence of such beauty.
A face that launched a thousand Gulf shrimp boats.

Serously, whoever that is, she is lovely.

Gilliatt

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I'm all flustered now :blush2: :svengo: I barely recognized her either:bawling:...Ah, the ravages of time...

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Originally Posted by Silas Thorne

I'm not sure if you are aware of this, but there was terrible news recently from China. A man ran over a boy with his car four times, and then tried to run off.
If you want to know more about this incident, here it is on a blog on China:
http://wtdevflnt.wordpress.com/2010/...raphic-photos/

I would advise against looking at the video. It is very disturbing. No one really did anything about the incident when it happened, and the images are sickening. But it did happen.

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How awful; that had to be the stupidest and most unfeeling man alive:nonod:

I meant to ask you about the new avatar Sounds. It is your good self then. Nice photo.

:D

I always thought she was a babe (can I say that in here?)

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Originally Posted by Paulclem

I meant to ask you about the new avatar Sounds. It is your good self then. Nice photo.

:D

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Thank you, Paul. Yes, me in the day; photos not quite as old as I am. It's funny, when I took that picture, I hated it (Made my cheeks look fat). Funny how your photos look better as you get older...So when are we going to see a vision of Paul?

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Originally Posted by prendrelemick

I always thought she was a babe (can I say that in here?)

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Say it as many times as you want...It sounds better every time:hurray: Can I still be an honorary bloke?:aureola:

I'm afraid vision is not the right word.:D

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Originally Posted by Paulclem

I'm afraid vision is not the right word.:D

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Come on Paul. You must have a picture somewhere of yourself as a young man about town.

Gentlemen, all those who have fallen in lust, please form an orderly queue. Quite a revelation, I must say, and a very pleasant one too....

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Originally Posted by Brian Bean

Come on Paul. You must have a picture somewhere of yourself as a young man about town.

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Followed by:

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Originally Posted by dafydd manton

Gentlemen, all those who have fallen in lust, please form an orderly queue. Quite a revelation, I must say, and a very pleasant one too....

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Did Paul post a picture of himself and I missed it?

You are queuing for Paul, right?

Yeah, just my type, manly, ex-Rugby player, roughs it in the Midlands, Yorkshire accent... All it requires now is a few tattoos of bulldogs and the Union Jack, and I'm sold..oh,and the statutory shaven head and inalbitity to express oneself without the F-word........... I must buy him a cherry liquer with a slice of cherry, a paper umbrella and a packet of Woodbines....

I think you may have lost Scheherezade with... "a packet of Woodbines."

Ah, the sweet lang syne...... and that cough!!! OK, Black Cat, then. Park Drive? No. 6?

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Originally Posted by dafydd manton

Ah, the sweet lang syne...... and that cough!!! OK, Black Cat, then. Park Drive? No. 6?

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Naturally, but Peter Stuyvesant, De Reszke and Du Maurier ( red or blue) also had their place.

Wot, no Camel? Or Sobranie (which tasted awful but looked cool!)

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Originally Posted by dafydd manton

Wot, no Camel? Or Sobranie (which tasted awful but looked cool!)

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Ah yes, Camel with their wonderful toasted flavour and the sophistication of Balkan Sobranie with their connotation of mysterious European lands.
I never did try the multi-coloured cocktail variety; a regret I will carry to the grave.

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Originally Posted by Brian Bean

I think you may have lost Scheherezade with... "a packet of Woodbines."

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Hey, I do know what "Woodbines" are...

I am a little confused about the Union Jack and bulldogs, though.

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Originally Posted by Paulclem

I'm afraid vision is not the right word.:D

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I'll bet you're adorable...do you have something in your rugby suit?:hurray:

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Originally Posted by Brian Bean

Come on Paul. You must have a picture somewhere of yourself as a young man about town.

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How about you, Brian? Give us a bit of the BAT (Brian About Town):driving:

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Originally Posted by dafydd manton

Gentlemen, all those who have fallen in lust, please form an orderly queue. Quite a revelation, I must say, and a very pleasant one too....

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Thank you, Dafydd, you inspired me with your new avatar...all those lovely curls that made the ladies go wild:p

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Originally Posted by Scheherazade

Followed by:Did Paul post a picture of himself and I missed it?

You are queuing for Paul, right?

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Yes, it would be nice to see some of the folks in their favorite photos... Are we ever going to get a peek at the real Scher?

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Originally Posted by dafydd manton

Wot, no Camel? Or Sobranie (which tasted awful but looked cool!)

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Ah Camels...no filter, just a mouthful of soft-packed tobacco. Now the Camel man in the adverts...yum, yum...:brow:

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Originally Posted by soundofmusic

Did I scare you guys with my new avatar?:alien:

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Terrified!

:D

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Originally Posted by Silas Thorne

I would advise against looking at the video. It is very disturbing. No one really did anything about the incident when it happened, and the images are sickening. But it did happen.

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Speechless.

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Originally Posted by prendrelemick

I always thought she was a babe (can I say that in here?)

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Coming from a sheep farmer, it may be problematic, but I think you'll squeeze by.

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Originally Posted by soundofmusic

...So when are we going to see a vision of Paul?

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(Shhh! You're embarrassing the poor man - that is him in his avatar!)

I used my face as an avatar once. The suicide rate tripled!

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

Terrified!

:D

Speechless.

(Shhh! You're embarrassing the poor man - that is him in his avatar!)

I used my face as an avatar once. The suicide rate tripled!

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Well, I'm glad you've overcome the fear; I missed you on the forum...by the way; is Jocky back on one of his world tours.
I'm sure all of the fellows would be very pleasant to look at...Paul's got me really curious with his wifes and mother in laws descriptions.
Now you know, Atheist, I always thought you were rather an impressive bloke...cold blue eyes and pure muscle...I'm sure Mrs Atheist would agree. :iagree:

Its suprising what a Players number six could be traded for behind the bike sheds at our school.:ladysman:

Did anyone actually smoke those Capstan Full Strengh, or were they really for caulking the decks of ships.

As for a photo ..I really think the sheep are the better alternative.

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Originally Posted by prendrelemick

Its suprising what a Players number six could be traded for behind the bike sheds at our school.:ladysman:

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I went to a boys-only school, dammit!

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Originally Posted by prendrelemick

Did anyone actually smoke those Capstan Full Strengh, or were they really for caulking the decks of ships.

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They were actually popular with sailors - my old man and some of his Navy pals used to smoke them.

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Originally Posted by prendrelemick

Its suprising what a Players number six could be traded for behind the bike sheds at our school.:ladysman:

As for a photo ..I really think the sheep are the better alternative.

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You're kidding; are you sure the girls were not just using the trade to get the fellows to start low...I mean...No, that's not what I meant:devil:
I meant, did they think they would eventually get a cozy little house and a full time mate in the deal...

Nah, I think you would make a better picture than the sheep; I notice you even have ones backside expsosed:lol:

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

I went to a boys-only school, dammit!

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You know, in my day a youngster could go to the beverage store and buy any wine or cigarettes he wanted "for his parents"...

Though, I have the feeling there were plenty of trades offs in single and double gender schools:nonod:

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Originally Posted by prendrelemick

As for a photo ..I really think the sheep are the better alternative.

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I just saw your photos: beautiful country...alert Mrs P; I'm moving in...I don't think I can drive on those slopes; maybe I should by a go-cart:auto:

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Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle

Well

Gilliatt

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Hey, Gilliatt, is that handsome bearded war coorespondent you in all those pics on the picture thread...are you holding out on us:devil:

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Originally Posted by soundofmusic

...Hey, Gilliatt, is that handsome bearded war coorespondent you in all those pics on the picture thread...are you holding out on us:devil:

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Hehe
No, that isn't me. I look something more like the nerdy prarie dog popping his head out of the tank.

This is as close as you will get for the time being:

http://i963.photobucket.com/albums/a...loudGate03.jpg

I'm reluctant to show more until I am fully convinced that we dodged the Y2K bullet.
Oh, but wait, we now have December 21, 2012 to gear up for. Looks like you will have to wait a couple more years.
Now I'm off to take inventory of my non perishable food cache.
Vienna sausages, deviled ham, spaghetti -o's,...

Gilliatt

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

I used my face as an avatar once. The suicide rate tripled!

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I intend to outdo your enterprising efforts with my own mugshot in place. Wish me luck!

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Originally Posted by Satan

I intend to outdo your enterprising efforts with my own mugshot in place. Wish me luck!

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Wow.

You, Paul and I could start a blokey Gorgon club!

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

Wow.

You, Paul and I could start a blokey Gorgon club!

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That's more like it.

I don't know - you don't log in for a couple of days and suddenly you're in demand.

As for my visage - my wife advised me against shaving off my beard and tache as I "have no chin", as has been noted before.

What with the blotchy red and paleness, i look a bit like a corned beef hash. I keep the beard and tache partly to give my head definition. I wouldn't want anyone to think it was on upside down.

:biggrin5:

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Originally Posted by soundofmusic

How about you, Brian? Give us a bit of the BAT (Brian About Town):driving:

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Here's one taken about a million years ago. As you can see,the town in question is Venice.


http://img69.imageshack.us/img69/8987/scan0002ku.jpg

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Originally Posted by Paulclem

That's more like it.

I don't know - you don't log in for a couple of days and suddenly you're in demand.

As for my visage - my wife advised me against shaving off my beard and tache as I "have no chin", as has been noted before.

What with the blotchy red and paleness, i look a bit like a corned beef hash. I keep the beard and tache partly to give my head definition. I wouldn't want anyone to think it was on upside down.

:biggrin5:

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:smilielol5:

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Originally Posted by Brian Bean

Here's one taken about a million years ago. As you can see,the town in question is Venice.

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Lovely scenery!

:D

Taking into account the curmudgeonly age of some of our chaps, I'd like to know if any of you share with me the extremely annoying complaint of hyperprostatism - an elarged prostate gland? Medically known as benign prostate hyperplasia.

Thanks to some self-study, I have come to the conclusion that asparagus is an irritant to elarged prostates and I want to try to figure if it's just mine, or if it does affect other blokes as well.

I want to run an informal study, getting blokes with hyperprostatism to eat asparagus and take notes.

If you don't feel like publicising your urinating habits, feel free to do it by PM!

:D

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Originally Posted by Brian Bean

Come on Paul. You must have a picture somewhere of yourself as a young man about town.

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I don't think I have. Photos were sparse in my past - which is perhaps a good thing as I had a mullet for a good while in the 80s. (Though I never had a permed version).

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

:smilielol5:

Taking into account the curmudgeonly age of some of our chaps, I'd like to know if any of you share with me the extremely annoying complaint of hyperprostatism - an elarged prostate gland? Medically known as benign prostate hyperplasia.

Thanks to some self-study, I have come to the conclusion that asparagus is an irritant to elarged prostates and I want to try to figure if it's just mine, or if it does affect other blokes as well.

I want to run an informal study, getting blokes with hyperprostatism to eat asparagus and take notes.

If you don't feel like publicising your urinating habits, feel free to do it by PM!

:D

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I'd help if I could, but I don't - or am not aware of - having it. It's a good idea though.

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Originally Posted by Paulclem

I don't think I have. Photos were sparse in my past - which is perhaps a good thing as I had a mullet for a good while in the 80s. (Though I never had a permed version).

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I'm afraid I'm not up on modern day slang. What is a mullet? I have always thought it was some kind of fish.

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

Thanks to some self-study, I have come to the conclusion that asparagus is an irritant to elarged prostates and I want to try to figure if it's just mine, or if it does affect other blokes as well.

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I'm fairly certain you're supposed to eat the asparagus, Atheist.