So that the doors won't get bored!
Why does the clock tick?
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So that the doors won't get bored!
Why does the clock tick?
Because non-stop tocking would get on your nerves after awhile.
Why do cats stray?
Because they are so embarrassed about the thing round their necks saying "Tiddles, 47 Gasworks Lane, S****horpe", they pretend not to know where they live.
Why is "hunting pink" red?
It is an attempt to prove that animals are not colorblind
Why do mermaids always have the bottom half of a fish, rather than the top half?
Because something with a fishes head and varicose veins wouldn't look that fantastic - or, indeed, fintastic!
With all the various forms of coummunication (Facebook, Twitter, Forums, Telephones, Mobiles et al) why is almost impossible to get hold of people?
Because everyone is calling everyone else all the time of course.
How do they make Scotch Eggs, anyway?
They feed the chickens phenomenal quantities of sausage-meat, then wait.....and wait.... and wait..
Shouldn't the Pope's job be hereditary?
Only if legitimate candidates can't be found.
Its very nice, but is it Art?
If Tracey Emmen's unmade bed is "art" then anything is, I guess.
Why do they call language a "barrier"?
Just like an oil barrier, if we spill a few wrong words, it may lead to a problem.
Why do the stock markets sway up and down?
Side to side might bust the market
Why does the tide come in twice a day?
Because if it only did it once a day, it might forget the way.
Why do we say "See you" to someone we patently obviously aren't going to see?
It's all to do with the hypnotic rhythm of the tides and the pull of the moon
Why is the sky blue?
Because if it wan't, all those phots in holiday brochures that make places like Blackpool look attractive would look silly, and if it was pink, it'd look even sillier.
Why are women so ******* contrary?
They have to work twice as hard to reach the level of an contrary man...
Why do people go on vacation just to complain?
Because it gives them something different to complain about. (I was once stuck at Amsterdam airport for 5 hours, got lumbered with this terrible woman from Manchester, you know the type - size 6 feet, size 3 shoes, too much jewellery, who complained that she'd been to Africa and it was HOT!! She then came out with the all time Boring Brit Abroad line - "and you can't get a decent cup of tea". When I started to chat with an airman from the German Air Force, in German, if looks could have killed, I'd have been buried in Holland!)
If flying is so safe, how come the guy selling Life Insurance at the airport does such a roaring trade?
Flying is safe until OTHERS are aboard the plane and YOU are walking on earth.
Why are there traffic lights?
People go out to find flashy things and so there are traffic lights!
Why do we create websites?
To confuse the colour-blind, who otherwise don't get much in the way of mental stimulus.
If we are what we eat, why am I so fond of nuts?
Perhaps you still don't know who you are.
Why a computer mouse has no tail?
So it doesn't get mistaken for a rat.
is it the alcohol that gives rats those pink eyes?
No it's their tight underwear
Why does a potato have eyes?
All chips off the old block do.
What happened to that turtle that was holding the world up, when it retired?
It went to hell.
Why a coconut tree has no branch?
After the tires were repaired he was fine and is still holding up the world. (timing issue with post, this goes with the turtle re-tire)
OK, Coconut trees have no branches because of all the francise paper work involved.
Why are there locks on stores that are opened 24 hours a day?
In the same way that I'm not European....yet.
Why do we talk about Tex/Mex foods, when there's a dirty great barrier between the two?
It adds flavor, like a martini dirtyQuote:
Originally Posted by dafydd manton
Why do we ask why?
In order to frustrate those in the know
Why do the Scholarly Males affect what is call "academically long hair"?
To hide the fact that, on top, they are going bald.
that's a point though, why do men go bald, and women don't ?
Because men have beard and women don't have.
Why do women use make up?
Because when they make down it's simply hopeless
Why do we cut down trees and pull up grass and wildflowers to build buildings then put trees or flower pots around them, sometimes in them?
Florist's need to make a living too, you know.
Why do people say "pinch me, I'm dreaming", if the dream was that good wouldn't you want it to continue?
Because if they said "shoot me" and someone did, it could get ugly fast.
Why are flying saucers not accompanied by cups or tea pots?
they are. My wife makes no distinction
why does sitting in the same position make your feet go numb?
Your butt needs the sympathy.
Why do wolves have such a bad rep?
It's mostly the bad breath, but a lack of communication skills doesn't help.. Also, they're rubbish at flower-arranging.
They also are capable of really baad rap, man!
Why why why, Delilah?
Because, because, because Samson!
Why do people buy "books" on tape?
Because of the green green grass of home, and the valley was also green.
Back to Unidentified Flying Objects - once you'e identified it as such, what should you call it?
Because the book is propping up the table leg.
Why isn't blancmange always white?