Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

So Classic. :D About Jane Austen.

boobs are overrated. it's all about the butt...

yeah.

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Originally Posted by PoeticPassions

boobs are overrated. it's all about the butt...

yeah.

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Could this be a genuine man we have come across? :D
He speaks the way of the grunt...

I gotcha, Poetic, I gotcha. :cool: But you know, its the legs for me.

Well I like a woman with a brain!! Am I right, men? Anyone?

**listens for the crickets**

(Mulan reference, Classic? No? :D Yes?)

**Crickets**

I am resorting to TRUE man talk to sort out the fakies...

Grunt, grunt, gruntgrunt, grunt, gur-unt, grunt. *Points at female body* GURRRRRUNT!

Sometimes I wish I was a man, for at least a week. Oh all the things that I would do...

But hey, sometimes I want to talk about butts and boobs and alcohol... why must we have these classifications??? I don't like talking about make-up, designers, or any of that stuff anyway... the one girly thing I do talk about is hot men. Other than that, I don't see why all these supposedly male things must exclude women?? Down with the old ways of thinking, I say! :D

Quote:

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Originally Posted by *Classic*Charm*

Well I like a woman with a brain!! Am I right, men? Anyone?

**listens for the crickets**

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Yes. Ill take a brain over a body anyday.

Intelligence is the sexiest ASSet. Sorry, I have an obsession with butts.

Ah HAH. We've weeded out the woman imposter!! -

It's Kevinella. Nice job, Classic.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by a_little_wisp

Ah HAH. We've weeded out the woman imposter!! -

It's Kevinella. Nice job, Classic.

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Damn you.....

Yessss high fives! I mean...props? (I mean that awkward thing guys do with their hands)

??

Quote:

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Originally Posted by *Classic*Charm*

Yeah, this constant need to eat, expel noxious gasses,...

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Ah, but at least blokes do it honestly - my kids crack up with the finger-pull fart. Not like those sneaky girls who quietly let off a stinker then try to blame the dog!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by a_little_wisp

I gotcha, Poetic, I gotcha. :cool: But you know, its the legs for me.

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Yes indeed, a great pair of legs takes all sorts of beating. (Says he married to a dancer.... ;) )

Quote:

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Originally Posted by *Classic*Charm*

Well I like a woman with a brain!! Am I right, men? Anyone?

**listens for the crickets**

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*splutter*

A brain? God no! Those ones have their brain attached to their mouth and they talk! No, a lobotomy is an ideal trait in a woman.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by *Classic*Charm*

Yessss high fives! I mean...props? (I mean that awkward thing guys do with their hands)

??

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The high five slap is a tough one to learn.

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Originally Posted by The Atheist

The high five slap is a tough one to learn.

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No it's not! Look at each other's elbows and just give 'er. You'll never miss, guaranteed. Try it!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by kevinthediltz

Yes. Ill take a brain over a body anyday.

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As long as it is attached to a curvy female body?

;)


Even though it is "boys-only" thread here, could I address the girls in this thread please?

What are you doing?

I am a little embarrassed that some (will not name names but I am sure they know who they are) are claiming to be men and post in this thread pretending to be men! That is very disappointing.

Why, oh, why would anyone to pretend to be men? Want to be a man?

We have to give it to the guys that even if occassionally they post in the Coffee thread, none of them come in high heels and say things like "Why do my nails keek chipping? Should I have caramel or light blond highlights? Does my bum look big in this?"

I might even propose that those who have made that unfortunate choice get banned from the "girls-only" thread for a week or so!

I hope I wasn't pretending to be a guy... I think it was obvious I was just a girl wanting to talk about guy things :D

guy talk is more fun than girl talk sometimes.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mono

Fight Song for the Men of LitNet
by mono

Kindly, gentlemen, of the LitNet, lend me your ears,
Even you, our Creator Admin, and hold up your beers,
For a time has come that we keep our thread alive,
And we, the men of LitNet, will surely survive!

Come Atheist, Virgil, JBI, Brian, and kilted alike,
And bazarov, and Silas, and Taliesen, we can do as we like,
And we can speak in masculine tones that we connive,
For we, the men of LitNet, shall certainly survive!

Come skib, Lokasenna, and crisaor we cannot forget,
And Comedian and Aimus, we can do like we shall never regret,
And librarius and NikolaiI, let us make this our testosterone hive,
Since we, the men of LitNet, can definitely survive!

In other places, we can speak of literature and poetry,
Or of religion, or quotations, and even philosophy;
Here we may collect and let our manlyhood drive,
Hence we, the men of LitNet, do indeed survive!

Let us roar, and boast, and brag of sounds from our orfices,
And fantasize of secretaries working in our offices,
Since our endowed competitiveness cannot let this thread dive,
Because we, the men of LitNet, are to survive!

We can argue and parade of our various sports,
And leave the women to volleyball and tennis courts,
Yet as the very best we can always strive,
But we, the men of LitNet, come here to survive!

So hold up your ales, your lagers, and I’ll have my porter,
Since among we men, we can have no hoarder;
Bless us with a “Cheers!” as we have brought this to life,
For we, the men of LitNet, will of course survive!



*shakes fist in the air, with a vegetarian hotdog in the other hand* :D

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That is really cool Mono!!!!!:thumbs_up Found myself punching the air along with it and i'm not even a man! :lol:

Ok for all the "men" in this thread... you all asked for it!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lUjhEHlh7s

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mono

Fight Song for the Men of LitNet
by mono

Kindly, gentlemen, of the LitNet, lend me your ears,
Even you, our Creator Admin, and hold up your beers,
For a time has come that we keep our thread alive,
And we, the men of LitNet, will surely survive!

Come Atheist, Virgil, JBI, Brian, and kilted alike,
And bazarov, and Silas, and Taliesen, we can do as we like,
And we can speak in masculine tones that we connive,
For we, the men of LitNet, shall certainly survive!

Come skib, Lokasenna, and crisaor we cannot forget,
And Comedian and Aimus, we can do like we shall never regret,
And librarius and NikolaiI, let us make this our testosterone hive,
Since we, the men of LitNet, can definitely survive!

In other places, we can speak of literature and poetry,
Or of religion, or quotations, and even philosophy;
Here we may collect and let our manlyhood drive,
Hence we, the men of LitNet, do indeed survive!

Let us roar, and boast, and brag of sounds from our orfices,
And fantasize of secretaries working in our offices,
Since our endowed competitiveness cannot let this thread dive,
Because we, the men of LitNet, are to survive!

We can argue and parade of our various sports,
And leave the women to volleyball and tennis courts,
Yet as the very best we can always strive,
But we, the men of LitNet, come here to survive!

So hold up your ales, your lagers, and I’ll have my porter,
Since among we men, we can have no hoarder;
Bless us with a “Cheers!” as we have brought this to life,
For we, the men of LitNet, will of course survive!



*shakes fist in the air, with a vegetarian hotdog in the other hand* :D

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So... Does this come with a manly dance routine? Testosterone hive, indeed. :lol:

Mono, you are officially brilliant!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Scheherazade

We have to give it to the guys that even if occassionally they post in the Coffee thread, none of them come in high heels and say things like "Why do my nails keek chipping? Should I have caramel or light blond highlights? Does my bum look big in this?"

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There might be a few who would.

mono -- awesome poem, I plan to read it again the next time I have to hit the head.

To the rest of the men: I offer us to reflect on one of life's great pleasures. The pleasure of which I speak, of course, is drinking cold beer in the shower. Now, if you have not had the wherewithal to crack open a cold Budweiser (or brew of choice) before reaching for that bar of Ivory soap, then you are missing out.

In undergrad, drinking beer in the shower was so popular, that we had a miniature refrigerator well socked with the cheapest brew from the cheapest liquor store next to the toilet.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have to shower up before I go to work.

Good Hunting!

Quote:

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Originally Posted by The Comedian

To the rest of the men: I offer us to reflect on one of life's great pleasures. The pleasure of which I speak, of course, is drinking cold beer in the shower. Now, if you have not had the wherewithal to crack open a cold Budweiser (or brew of choice) before reaching for that bar of Ivory soap, then you are missing out.

In undergrad, drinking beer in the shower was so popular, that we had a miniature refrigerator well socked with the cheapest brew from the cheapest liquor store next to the toilet.

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Really?:lol:

"In undergrad, drinking beer in the shower was so popular, that we had a miniature refrigerator well socked with the cheapest brew from the cheapest liquor store next to the toilet. "

"Really?"

I expect they poured it straight in, just to cut out the middle man.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by mono

Fight Song for the Men of LitNet
by mono

Kindly, gentlemen, of the LitNet, lend me your ears,
Even you, our Creator Admin, and hold up your beers,
For a time has come that we keep our thread alive,
And we, the men of LitNet, will surely survive!


......


So hold up your ales, your lagers, and I’ll have my porter,
Since among we men, we can have no hoarder;
Bless us with a “Cheers!” as we have brought this to life,
For we, the men of LitNet, will of course survive!



*shakes fist in the air, with a vegetarian hotdog in the other hand* :D

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This ought to be published...

What thread am I missing out on here?

We talk about boobs and hammers. But the women couldnt resist joining us. Tired of talking about purses it seems...

Mono - BRAVO!!! :D

Atheist - agree on the beer, 45 angle rule was somehow forgotten :lol:

Some of you remember Denise Richards in early days? Or hate hairs in nose (I cried yesterday because of it)?

Smile and eyes are top; boobs and *** will be ruined after first child or after hard break up :)

Pilsner, wheat/white beer or black beer? What do you prefer?

P.S. Bud and something from Australia (Forest ?)- only two outside from Europe I tried and also two worst beers I ever tried.:sick:

Quote:

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Originally Posted by kevinthediltz

We talk about boobs and hammers. But the women couldnt resist joining us. Tired of talking about purses it seems...

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Well...I don't have any boobs yet, but as I guess as I get older, I'll have to get me one of Kramer's Bro contraptions (Seinfeld episode). But I do work in the construction field...that's where we hoot and holler...and make cat calls...right?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by BienvenuJDC

Well...I don't have any boobs yet, but as I guess as I get older, I'll have to get me one of Kramer's Bro contraptions (Seinfeld episode). But I do work in the construction field...that's where we hoot and holler...and make cat calls...right?

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The construction site is where we create all our philosophy.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by bazarov

Pilsner, wheat/white beer or black beer? What do you prefer?

P.S. Bud and something from Australia (Forest ?)- only two outside from Europe I tried and also two worst beers I ever tried.:sick:

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Fosters? Does it come in a dark blue can? They can't be worse than Stella Atois (sp?)

Hey guys,

I'm loving all the wonderful topics that this thread addresses: beer, chicks, poetry, beer, chicks, beer. . . But something was missing (to me at least): fish. Do any of you all go fishing? If so, I can' think of a better place than here to tell your "big fish" stories.

When I'm not at work, I'll post a picture of a beautiful brook trout (speckled trout, for the Canucks here) that I have mounted to the wall of my reading room.

:)

Quote:

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Originally Posted by bazarov

P.S. Bud and something from Australia (Forest ?)- only two outside from Europe I tried and also two worst beers I ever tried.:sick:

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Quote:

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Originally Posted by SleepyWitch

Fosters? Does it come in a dark blue can? They can't be worse than Stella Atois (sp?)

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Yeah i reckon hes on about Fosters. Possibly the rankest beer on the planet.
You forgot the R in Artois. And its not that bad...
*spots an Erdinger Weiss, grabs it, and sneaks out of "the blokes thread" and heads for "Who wants a Beer!"*

Quote:

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Originally Posted by bazarov

Or hate hairs in nose (I cried yesterday because of it)?

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Nose hair!

That's another of the things which prove that god is really a woman. I mean, childbirth, periods, bah - they're nothing; women would give up if they had to go through what we men do.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by bazarov

Smile and eyes are top; boobs and *** will be ruined after first child or after hard break up :)

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Shhh - we don't want the young fellas to get the right idea.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by bazarov

P.S. Bud and something from Australia (Forest ?)- only two outside from Europe I tried and also two worst beers I ever tried.:sick:

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Quote:

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Originally Posted by SleepyWitch

Fosters? Does it come in a dark blue can? They can't be worse than Stella Atois (sp?)

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It would definitely be Fosters, because that is the second-worst beer in the world.

Just behind Budweiser as the worst.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by The Comedian

Hey guys,

I'm loving all the wonderful topics that this thread addresses: beer, chicks, poetry, beer, chicks, beer. . . But something was missing (to me at least): fish. Do any of you all go fishing? If so, I can' think of a better place than here to tell your "big fish" stories.

When I'm not at work, I'll post a picture of a beautiful brook trout (speckled trout, for the Canucks here) that I have mounted to the wall of my reading room.

:)

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Fishing? You bet.

I dunno about that stuff you catch in rivers & lakes though - fishing is what we do in the sea and I don't think the excuse that the sea is 8000 miles away is much of an excuse.

This is just my daughter's best catch from a while back:

http://i150.photobucket.com/albums/s...baje20fish.jpg

In response to the aforementioned female tennis players, Ana Ivanovic (the third one) is by far the most attractive. Brunettes.

Are men obsessed with beer or something? I'd take straight whiskey over it any day.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by SleepyWitch

Fosters? Does it come in a dark blue can? They can't be worse than Stella Atois (sp?)

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Yes it is in a dark blue can and tastes absolutely dreadful but because it is weak and cheaper than many other beers, it is popular with teenagers. One must be carefull in pubs when talking about beers though because it could cause trouble. I went into a pub and asked for a pint of lager. The barman asked if I wanted Fosters and I said "That's only for women and children" and ordered something else. When the barman asked a guy standing next to me what he wanted, he replied "Fosters."
Stella Artois is a better drink but no match for Leffe Blonde which is the best lager in the world and rather expensive.
You must remember that we do not have the Reinheitsgebot in the UK, so most German lagers are made here under licence and bear no relation to the original German beers.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Brian Bean

Yes it is in a dark blue can and tastes absolutely dreadful but because it is weak and cheaper than many other beers, it is popular with teenagers. One must be carefull in pubs when talking about beers though because it could cause trouble. I went into a pub and asked for a pint of lager. The barman asked if I wanted Fosters and I said "That's only for women and children" and ordered something else. When the barman asked a guy standing next to me what he wanted, he replied "Fosters."
Stella Artois is a better drink but no match for Leffe Blonde which is the best lager in the world and rather expensive.
You must remember that we do not have the Reinheitsgebot in the UK, so most German lagers are made here under licence and bear no relation to the original German beers.

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Stella Artois makes me want to kill myself. I do not mind some Fosters, though. There are a lot of American beers that can compete with both of those on the 'nasty' scale.

I prefer the Vermont beer Magic Hat Number 9

EDIT: but then again, I'm American, what do I know

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mathor

Stella Artois makes me want to kill myself. I do not mind some Fosters, though. There are a lot of American beers that can compete with both of those on the 'nasty' scale.

I prefer the Vermont beer Magic Hat Number 9

EDIT: but then again, I'm American, what do I know

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I admit that I haven't had Stella Artois for some time so perhaps it has deteriorated in the interim. There are a number of American beers other than Budweiser available in the UK such as Coors and Miller Light but they are all pretty tasteless, as are the majority of British lagers. There is one really powerfull British lager called Tennants Super which does live up to its name but is very strong and, as far as I know, cannot be bought in pubs but is sold in tins. Americans and others coming to these shores are often puzzled by English Ale, colloquially known as bitter, and is completely different from lager and drunk by a large part of the male drinking public. It is, in my view, a much tatstier beer than lager and is also cheaper. The one drawback is the calorie count which means an increase in weight greater than that for lager drinkers. I like it but for visiting foreigners it is an acquired taste, I heard one German describe it as like drinking diesel oil.

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Virgil

If you have to ask, you're not too familiar with men. :lol:

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No, I don't have to ask; and I am quite familar with men's ways, thank you! And now, I see a lot of women invaders to this thread....it's getting more posts than any other threads, I noticed...quite the place to hang out these days....:D

....and Mono, I loved your poem! :thumbs_up:lol:

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This thread is a ball of laughs. :D

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hahaah...is that a play on words, Virgil? Like I don't know by now how you think. :lol:

Play on words...you ought to check out the Thread about clothing...would that be a Thread of threads?

Quote:

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Originally Posted by Mathor

In response to the aforementioned female tennis players, Ana Ivanovic (the third one) is by far the most attractive. Brunettes.

Are men obsessed with beer or something? I'd take straight whiskey over it any day.

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I'm with you, Mathor! Jack me! Or Jim me. Or Knob me. **** it. Just whiskey me.