A Non-Medical Poem

[Nick Capozzoli]

Here is another old poem in my collection. The occasion of this poem is a photograph of myself at age 8, taken just after my First Communion.

First Communion

He is neatly posed in the photograph
In blue suit with a white armband
On the left. There is the not-quite laugh
Of an eight-year-old. The right hand

Stiffly at his side displays a ring
Carved with an image of the Paraclete.
Last night he confessed everything
He’d done at school or on the street.

His soul was white as the armband
Or the Eucharist he’d swallowed whole
Moments before. He did not understand
Transubstantiation, yet knew his soul

Would go to heaven if he died right there.
Thus the angelic smile and rigid stance,
And the feeling that he could walk on air
Unburdened of sin, the inheritance

Of Adam and his own yet brief career.
The stiffness, perhaps, betrays a fear
Of what awaits him in the future when
His soul will never be so white again.

[cacian]

a really interesting interpretation of you age 8. Communion must have had a real impression on you. :)

what would an 8 year old confess that is so burdened I wonder?

my favourite lines:
''yet knew his soul
Would go to heaven if he died right there.
Thus the angelic smile and rigid stance,
And the feeling that he could walk on air


it is interesting you compare unsiness with the colour white or innocence.
I do not understand what you mean by:
''the white arm band''?
the Paraclete?
''the inheritance of Adam and his own yet brief career.''

[Nick Capozzoli]

a really interesting interpretation of you age 8. Communion must have had a real impression on you. :)

what would an 8 year old confess that is so burdened I wonder?

my favourite lines:
''yet knew his soul
Would go to heaven if he died right there.
Thus the angelic smile and rigid stance,
And the feeling that he could walk on air


it is interesting you compare unsiness with the colour white or innocence.
I do not understand what you mean by:
''the white arm band''?
the Paraclete?
''the inheritance of Adam and his own yet brief career.''

Thanks for the comments! I'll try to answer your questions.

what would an 8 year old confess that is so burdened I wonder?

Lots of things, at least for a Roman Catholic kid who was taught by nuns in NYC parochial schools, which were pretty good at instilling a robust self-flagellating superego and sense of guilt. That was just before Vatican II when the Mass was still said in Latin.

I do not understand what you mean by:
''the white arm band''?
the Paraclete?
''the inheritance of Adam and his own yet brief career.''

First Commumicants wore a white satin armband with some Christian symbols (cross, IHS, etc.) written on it. A few years later at Confirmation, a similar armband in red was worn. For First Communion I was given a gold ring, like a signet ring, to wear. It had a carved relief of the Holy Ghost (the Paraclete), basically a bird emanating tongues of fire. Standard ecclesiastical imagery, but I'm not sure it relates to Communion. It belonged to my Communion "godfather," and in fact may have been more appropriate for another Sacrament, like Confirmation or even Holy Orders.

As regards the inheritance of Adam, that is "Sin" in general, though technically it refers to "Original Sin." OS was conveniently taken care of by the first Sacrament, Baptism. Because Baptism, in Catholicism, is routinely received by an infant who has no choice in the matter (his "godparent" renounces Satan and accepts Jesus Christ for him), it is necessary for the baptized person to later consciously reaffirm his belief when he has achieved the "age of reason." By that time he in all likelihood has committed some sins since having had his slate whiped clean of his inherited Original Sin by Baptism. He needs to cleanse his soul of these acquired sins, through Confession, which is a sacramental prerequisite for Communion. I don't recall all that I confessed in my "First Confession," but it probably included stuff like talking back to my parents and teachers, telling lies, using "bad words," and saying "mean things" to people. Trivial stuff indeed from an adult perspective, but serious enough to bar my soul from immediately entering Heaven if I happened to get run over by a bus on my way to school.

I do remember, very distinctly, feeling great relief at having confessed my sins and achieving a state of sufficient grace to receive the Holy Communion (which we were taught was the Body of Christ). I also remember that I scrupulously avoided committing any new sins the time I made my First Confession and received First Communion, but I was worried that sooner or later I would commit new sins. I guess I imagined these sins would be more of the same sort of stuff I'd confessed. The "as yet brief career" was my life up to that point (and I could remember only about 3 or 4 of my previous 8 years ). Even then I had an inkling and fear that there would be many more opportunities to sin, and sin more seriously as an adult. This is the part of the poem where I'm thinking both forward from my 8 year old perspective and backward from my adult perspective.

I hope this explanation helps.

[cacian]

great feedback Nick thank you.
you mention an inkling and fear of sin from the age of 8. It must have been quite a thing to be aware of such at this very young age. I do not think I knew I was in this world when I was 10 and 11 let alone 8. I have to admit I was not aware of things like this.. I had no religious input of such. I am not sure it is a good thing for a child to be burden with such heavy concept.

[AuntShecky]

This poem is lovely, your best so far!

[Nick Capozzoli]

This poem is lovely, your best so far!

Thanks AS.

Nick