Dead Stare

[miyako73]

like a flesh offering
on the moist ground
unveiled to the dawn
birthing the warmth
the yellow of the sun
i offer myself naked
on the wooden floor
to the white ceiling
of infinite directions
as vast as memory.

anywhere is empty.

[Beautifull]

Very complex, yet it's so simple! The first five lines are refering to nature("moist ground" and "dawn" and "sun") , yet the last lines are like you're inside("wooden floor" and "white ceiling"). Maybe trying to connect to nature, and offering yourself as nature is, naked?

[Bar22do]

anywhere is empty.
is a strong statement, thought provoking...

Memory is a vast field for action... and action needs focus (i.e. choice); on the other hand, there is much daring in exposing oneself to the immensity, and who knows, the latter might pick up the courageous to endow him/her/it with a mission...

best regards - Bar

[Hawkman]

I really like this poem. It recognises the potential choices in life and accepts them. I don't think you need the last line though, it reads as an extraneous thought. best, H

[miyako73]

The impetus of this poem was the homeless man I saw half-covered on the ground.

This poem is about being "homeless" even though I have a home.

[Hawkman]

I'm afraid that doesn't really come accross very well. Perhaps a less ambiguous title would help.

H

[Beautifull]

The impetus of this poem was the homeless man I saw half-covered on the ground.

This poem is about being "homeless" even though I have a home.

Ah...

[PrinceMyshkin]

What elegant, unforced beauty there is here. Thank you.

[miyako73]

Thank you. Coming from you, it means a lot to me.