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I stood in the bathroom
watching the tap water,
splashing against
the white porcelain,
the crashing sound
seeped into my ears
like a hypnotic drug,
it jammed my hearing and
encapsulated my body,
I was drowning into
the transparent noise,
longitudinal waves
filled my lungs,
blocked my sight,
and pushed my body
into another dimension,
where my particles
were free.
Good poem! Even if near the end there is a decrease in pace and impact :
"and pushed my body
into another dimension,
where my particles
were free."
reminds me of one of those movie scenes where the camera zooms in sharply on everything and the volume increases on each small thing as the character is a) either losing their mind b) filled with terror or c) on a wild trip
Quote:
Originally Posted by Delta40
Delta you found the word that's it: SHARP... like that comparison... its a sharp text - like a little knife.
Jeos and Delta, Thanks for reading and commenting. ;]
Twota, I missed this one, sorry. And I like it. Reminds us (me) of so many possible dimensions we could go to or even go (sometimes unaware). Good to read you, thanks Twota.
Thanks bar, glad you enjoyed it. :)
Hello Twota
love poems about little moments in time. Got a bit universal towards the end but when you get into these little moments in your day it ends up that way. Looking at yourself in a mirror for example.
anyways, enjoyed and good to read you again.
cheers
JB
Thanks jerry, glad you liked it. x)