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Thread: The Sink

  1. #1
    Miaaow! Twota's Avatar
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    The Sink

    I stood in the bathroom
    watching the tap water,
    splashing against
    the white porcelain,
    the crashing sound
    seeped into my ears
    like a hypnotic drug,
    it jammed my hearing and
    encapsulated my body,
    I was drowning into
    the transparent noise,
    longitudinal waves
    filled my lungs,
    blocked my sight,
    and pushed my body
    into another dimension,
    where my particles
    were free.

  2. #2
    Registered User Jeos's Avatar
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    Good poem! Even if near the end there is a decrease in pace and impact :
    "and pushed my body
    into another dimension,
    where my particles
    were free."

  3. #3
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    reminds me of one of those movie scenes where the camera zooms in sharply on everything and the volume increases on each small thing as the character is a) either losing their mind b) filled with terror or c) on a wild trip
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  4. #4
    Registered User Jeos's Avatar
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    Twota's

    Quote Originally Posted by Delta40 View Post
    reminds me of one of those movie scenes where the camera zooms in sharply on everything and the volume increases on each small thing as the character is a) either losing their mind b) filled with terror or c) on a wild trip

    Delta you found the word that's it: SHARP... like that comparison... its a sharp text - like a little knife.

  5. #5
    Miaaow! Twota's Avatar
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    Jeos and Delta, Thanks for reading and commenting. ;]

  6. #6
    Still, on a chalk plateau Bar22do's Avatar
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    Twota, I missed this one, sorry. And I like it. Reminds us (me) of so many possible dimensions we could go to or even go (sometimes unaware). Good to read you, thanks Twota.

  7. #7
    Miaaow! Twota's Avatar
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    Thanks bar, glad you enjoyed it.

  8. #8
    It wasn't me Jerrybaldy's Avatar
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    Hello Twota
    love poems about little moments in time. Got a bit universal towards the end but when you get into these little moments in your day it ends up that way. Looking at yourself in a mirror for example.
    anyways, enjoyed and good to read you again.
    cheers
    JB

    For those who believe,
    no explanation is necessary.
    For those who do not,
    none will suffice.

  9. #9
    Miaaow! Twota's Avatar
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    Thanks jerry, glad you liked it. x)

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