Thank you!
It's really nice seeing you around again. I miss your constructive feedbacks.
Indeed I am
Sir, are you there?
Unfortunately I'm not qualified to comment on the accuracy of this text - I have no interest in religion. As for your writing style - it is dreadfully archaic. For example, no one uses words like 'thy' in this day and age even in poetry. I'm assuming you were trying to copy the style of the Old Testament or some similar ancient tome in order to make your writing appear more authentic. But there is also a fundamental problem with the way you write English - what you have sent me makes no sense whatsoever. It sounds quite extravagant but it's actually completely incomprehensible. It begs the question why you have chosen to produce such complex, well-researched (presumably?) material in a langiage with which you have only very limited skills. No one who speaks or reads English as their mother tongue will waste their time sifting through this nonsense in search of a shred of meaning. I'm afraid you are wasting your talents. H
Ye, the custodian of passions, let the reins wail And fill thy grail For Heavenly Hosts are lost among the swords As grudge awards And burnt in flames of infernal revenge of gloom And dusk of tomb Beating drums, stabbing flashes and appears Drinking their fears By his divine looks, grappling their dark lines As a star shines He told them “time to taste life, oh swords Tell your lords” When he stepped with pride, stepping on death’s pity And crashing their unity *** Oh grief, float my body on your waves of banes Or give me graves to hide my wounds and pains In spring of sorrow, I sail in seas of woe To mourn long-haired stars when flow And fall, and black sun of joys and bliss Covered with immortal light of sadness as Abyss The end
Hello my dear critic....I've been busy recently. I wanted you to criticize this text, for including religious allusions. I think you have heard about Imam Al-Husain, the one who was slaughtered, his six brothers and sons, and his household were captivated. I think you've heard Charles Dickens' saying about him. By the way, he is one of my ancestors. Anyway, maybe you are not interested with its philosophical contents, but I hope you give me your general impression about it. I need you to suggest a proper title, and whether it is appropriate to be posted in the forum. Thanx Again the sky howls and stones cry And the storm weeps upon the desert dry Turning in anarchy, the world can’t hold The center, and drowned in gloomy fears unfold God has lowered chaos when the world let His blood be shed and hid in sands and set *** To be continued... Part 1
