Little Things
A single bird
on night's sky.
A distant point
on some horizon
A single drop
on some tree's leaf.
A lonely cloud
with silver lining.
Life's small gifts.
Left unseen by man,
unnoticed by his mind,
unfelt by his soul.
Little Things
Little Things
A single bird
on night's sky.
A distant point
on some horizon
A single drop
on some tree's leaf.
A lonely cloud
with silver lining.
Life's small gifts.
Left unseen by man,
unnoticed by his mind,
unfelt by his soul.
Always, Sincere
The opposite of loneliness isn't togetherness, it's intimacy.
A very elegant poem - simple but subtle. Thanks for sharing.
H
You're very welcome hillwalker, and thank you for your reply. The people I've shown it to say it's my best one so far (I haven't uploaded any of my others yet). I'll upload the rest soon. I hope you'll like them too.
Always, Sincere
The opposite of loneliness isn't togetherness, it's intimacy.
A very hopeful poem. I do wish, however, you would find some phrase in place of the overly familiar "silver lining."
nice microscopic look at the world to remind us all....
Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb
Very inspiring.
Love how inspirational it is!
I sang of leaves, of leaves of gold, and leaves of gold there grew.
It's a nice little reminder to all of us that there's a larger scheme of things.
"But do you really, seriously, Major Scobie," Dr. Sykes asked, "believe in hell?"
"In flames and torment?""Oh, yes, I do."
"That sort of hell wouldn't worry me," Fellowes said."Perhaps not quite that. They tell us it may be a permanent sense of loss."
"Perhaps you've never lost anything of importance," Scobie said.
Bump.
Too sweet. The very last line I quoted on a different site- to you, yes. It's very touching.
Dreaming is the easiest part of growing up.
Achieving those dreams is a little harder.But in the end, it's always worth it.
Everybody, thank you for your awesome replies. PrinceMyshkin, thank you too. I see you've been in this forum for a very long time and have much more experience with poetry than me, but I'll keep Little Things as I wrote it. Please, don't take this as offence or a sign of disrespect, I just think, that if it changes every time someone thinks it could be better... In the end, it just won't be my Little Things.I hope you understand.
Last edited by Sincere; 10-22-2010 at 01:39 PM.
Always, Sincere
The opposite of loneliness isn't togetherness, it's intimacy.
Heartwarming, Sincere.
And reading this I have no doubt you are.
cheers
jerry
For those who believe,
no explanation is necessary.
For those who do not,
none will suffice.
It could just be my overwhelming cynicism, oh wait, I am sure it is that,
but I liked the thought better than what actually was written down.
I see that you don't want to change it and that I can really relate to, but for what it's worth,
It seems like a pretty mediocre poem to me. It could have been better if it focused on one small thing and how that small thing really mattered. I don't know if I am saying what I mean, but I hope I am.
Just my opinion. Not right or wrong, just mine.
Lovely little piece. Well done.
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