Buying through this banner helps support the forum!
Page 138 of 469 FirstFirst ... 3888128133134135136137138139140141142143148188238 ... LastLast
Results 2,056 to 2,070 of 7033

Thread: Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

  1. #2056
    Registered User jocky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    The Simpsons Treehouse. Duh
    Posts
    770
    Blog Entries
    2
    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    I would never snub buns.
    This is a most retrograde step Mick, one might even say backward. Is this the start of a bun fight? Well let me be the first to throw the buns, I pray the coffee girls are not watching, or we will never hear the end of it. By the way, Old Helmet has shuffled off his mortal coil, his last words were ' tell Gilly I forgive him'

    Guys, did I ever tell you about the time me and the wife went to Yorkshire on holiday ? On our last night we went to the Slaughtered Lamb for a few refreshments. What a time we almost had, the wife was arm wrestling with the local chapter of the Hells Angels and I was standing at the bar pontificating on the benefits of the Scottish Enlightenment. Everything was going swimmingly until I asked innocently if anyone knew of a character called Prendrelemick? Immediately the bar went deathly silent, even the Hells Angels went pale. The interminable silence was shattered by a loud peel of thunder and a flash of lightning which lit up the premises through the iron barred windows. An old man who had been sitting strangely silently shuffled over to me wearing a cloth cap and his coat tied with a length of rope and said in a soft but scary voice " Ey up Jocky lad, that is a name we never mention in these parts, when thou goes home tonight take thy sen and thine missus quietly back, and stick to the path Jocky, stick to the path "

  2. #2057
    sound of music soundofmusic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    florida
    Posts
    1,547
    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    SOUNDS: Tell us menfolk, what exactly are your "Buns" and why do you freeze them off? Are they like verrucas?
    My, you've given me something to think about. I had always assumed that everyone call derrieres "buns". Since a "bum" is a derilect and buns are nice soft sweet bread like things that carry our favorite meats: hot dogs and hamburgers...Perhaps there is more to this, I must reflect...
    Quote Originally Posted by The Atheist View Post


    I'm not sure whether it's a deliberate euphemism for "bum", or some other bit. The thought of bunions hadn't crossed my mind. Do they get worse in cold weather? They lk bad enough any old time.
    Yes, the manatees don't fare too well in the cold after the power boats run them over...
    Yes, buns definitely get worse in cold weather; particularly when they are placed in plastic lawn chairs

    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    I note, with some interest, that some of the fellows are getting into a lather over the semantics of "buns". It is time to apply some good Scottish common sense to the problem and Jocky is just the man to do it. Here are the dictionary defenitions of the noun buns:

    1. A small bread roll, often sweetened or spiced and sometimes containing dried fruit.

    2. A tight roll of hair worn at the back of the head.

    There is, of course, a slang term but I am sure Soundo would never stoop to discussing her keister on the blokes thread. I hope this has cleared the matter up once and for all.
    Thank you, jocky, for that vote of faith. As soon as I learn what a keister is; I intend to wipe it from my vocabulary...

    Quote Originally Posted by gbrekken View Post
    just as hot water freezes more quickly than cold, so it is with buns?
    I haven't proven that with water yet; but as far as leaving a hot tub...
    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    I would never snub buns.
    I'm touched; but my buns remain print free

  3. #2058
    Clinging to Douvres rocks Gilliatt Gurgle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    2,716
    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    ... By the way, Old Helmet has shuffled off his mortal coil, his last words were ' tell Gilly I forgive him'
    Quote Originally Posted by soundofmusic View Post
    ...Since a "bum" is a derilect and buns are nice soft sweet bread like things that carry our favorite meats: hot dogs and hamburgers...

    Yes, the manatees...
    Yes, buns definitely...
    ...a keister is...
    I'm touched; but my buns...
    I smell something rotten in the state of Scotland could it be that you delayed the internment of this funeral baked squab?

    Say, now there’s a tasty idea for those buns:
    “Come on down to McDonald’s and test fly the McSquab. A tasty delight starting with a select breast filet from our farm raised German short hair pigeons, marinated in Glenlivit for three days, placed on a PETA bun smothered in a layer of melted Allgäuer Emmentaler. And may we suggest a side of manatee Au Jus dipping sauce for those little bombers to dive into.
    On sale now for just 99 pence, so you better hurry on down before they all fly away!


    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    Guys, ...until I asked innocently if anyone knew of a character called Prendrelemick?
    ...An old man who had been sitting strangely silently shuffled over to me wearing a cloth cap and his coat tied with a length of rope and said in a soft but scary voice " Ey up Jocky lad, that is a name we never mention in these parts, when thou goes home tonight take thy sen and thine missus quietly back, and stick to the path Jocky, stick to the path "
    (smilie that is laughing)
    Jocky, your strange, silent, shuffling old man sounds an awful lot like the old shaman, “Terrier”, back in Dumas. Your gaffe at mentioning the name Prendrelemick explains the flurry of HAM radio chatter I picked up from the boys at the Dreary Beery. I am now convinced that the character of Prendrelemick is far more ominous than any of us could have ever imagined.
    I would agree Jocky, you best heed the warning; stick to the path and be wary of the Marfa Lights.
    "Mongo only pawn in game of life" - Mongo

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKRma7PDW10

  4. #2059
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Yorkshire
    Posts
    4,871
    Blog Entries
    29
    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    This is a most retrograde step Mick, one might even say backward. Is this the start of a bun fight? Well let me be the first to throw the buns, I pray the coffee girls are not watching, or we will never hear the end of it. By the way, Old Helmet has shuffled off his mortal coil, his last words were ' tell Gilly I forgive him'

    Guys, did I ever tell you about the time me and the wife went to Yorkshire on holiday ? On our last night we went to the Slaughtered Lamb for a few refreshments. What a time we almost had, the wife was arm wrestling with the local chapter of the Hells Angels and I was standing at the bar pontificating on the benefits of the Scottish Enlightenment. Everything was going swimmingly until I asked innocently if anyone knew of a character called Prendrelemick? Immediately the bar went deathly silent, even the Hells Angels went pale. The interminable silence was shattered by a loud peel of thunder and a flash of lightning which lit up the premises through the iron barred windows. An old man who had been sitting strangely silently shuffled over to me wearing a cloth cap and his coat tied with a length of rope and said in a soft but scary voice " Ey up Jocky lad, that is a name we never mention in these parts, when thou goes home tonight take thy sen and thine missus quietly back, and stick to the path Jocky, stick to the path "
    It were all a misunderstandin' ah tell thee! And anyway I wouldn't take much notice of awd Seth, he's not been the same since he sold his IT consultantcy to the Germans.

  5. #2060
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Coventry, West Midlands
    Posts
    6,363
    Blog Entries
    36
    Quote Originally Posted by soundofmusic View Post
    My, you've given me something to think about. I had always assumed that everyone call derrieres "buns". Since a "bum" is a derilect and buns are nice soft sweet bread like things that carry our favorite meats: hot dogs and hamburgers...Perhaps there is more to this, I must reflect...


    Yes, the manatees don't fare too well in the cold after the power boats run them over...
    Yes, buns definitely get worse in cold weather; particularly when they are placed in plastic lawn chairs



    Thank you, jocky, for that vote of faith. As soon as I learn what a keister is; I intend to wipe it from my vocabulary...



    I haven't proven that with water yet; but as far as leaving a hot tub...


    I'm touched; but my buns remain print free
    Are they called buns because when you hold two of them together...

  6. #2061
    sound of music soundofmusic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    florida
    Posts
    1,547
    Quote Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle View Post
    I smell something rotten in the state of Scotland could it be that you delayed the internment of this funeral baked squab?

    Say, now there’s a tasty idea for those buns:
    “Come on down to McDonald’s and test fly the McSquab. A tasty delight starting with a select breast filet from our farm raised German short hair pigeons, marinated in Glenlivit for three days, placed on a PETA bun smothered in a layer of melted Allgäuer Emmentaler. And may we suggest a side of manatee Au Jus dipping sauce for those little bombers to dive into.
    On sale now for just 99 pence, so you better hurry on down before they all .
    I'll stop before the 2nd course; I can't eat anything that looks like my 1st mother-in-law

    [QUOTE=Paulclem;827067]Are they called buns because when you hold two of them together...[/QUOTE

    Yes! It is always better to find a "bun warmer" to keep them at their peak and don't forget the clotted cream and lemon marmalade!

  7. #2062
    Orwellian The Atheist's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    The George Orwell sub-forum
    Posts
    4,638
    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    I note, with some interest, that some of the fellows are getting into a lather over the semantics of "buns". It is time to apply some good Scottish common sense to the problem and Jocky is just the man to do it. Here are the dictionary defenitions of the noun buns:

    1. A small bread roll, often sweetened or spiced and sometimes containing dried fruit.

    2. A tight roll of hair worn at the back of the head.

    There is, of course, a slang term but I am sure Soundo would never stoop to discussing her keister on the blokes thread. I hope this has cleared the matter up once and for all.
    Alas, it's a recurring problem.

    Lots of people also refer to rolls as buns, which is confusing, since a roll with a couple of buns in the open might well be misconstrued.

    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    " Ey up Jocky lad, that is a name we never mention in these parts, when thou goes home tonight take thy sen and thine missus quietly back, and stick to the path Jocky, stick to the path "
    Good god, it's Geoffrey Boycott!

    Quote Originally Posted by soundofmusic View Post
    Yes! It is always better to find a "bun warmer" to keep them at their peak and don't forget the clotted cream and lemon marmalade!
    Wouldn't the marmalade stick to your thermal underwear?

  8. #2063
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2008
    Location
    Yorkshire
    Posts
    4,871
    Blog Entries
    29
    Then there's baps, bloomers and bottom cakes, but lets not go there.

  9. #2064
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Coventry, West Midlands
    Posts
    6,363
    Blog Entries
    36
    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    Then there's baps, bloomers and bottom cakes, but lets not go there.
    Stotties in Sunderland and Newcastle - which sounds like a type of underwear, and batches in Coventry, which sounds like some kind of rash.

    You wouldn'twant to replace buns with stotties though - stottie are big, round and flat. They'd look more like an elephant's backside, which might be appropriate for some people - present company excepted - but it's not the image you want to conjure.

  10. #2065
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    Coventry, West Midlands
    Posts
    6,363
    Blog Entries
    36
    Good god, it's Geoffrey Boycott!

    My rough cousin and his mates used to throw stones at Geoffrey Boycott's house when he was a lad. I just thought you'd like to know.

  11. #2066
    Registered User gbrekken's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    near Lake Wobegon
    Posts
    159
    I have missed a few buttons, but they're some thi8ngs not even would joke about. HAs are one of them. Ask me no questions, and I will tell you no why. It's nice to be friends, but I've no intention of making enemies, here, or anywhere. PEACE
    heavenly blue morning glory

  12. #2067
    sound of music soundofmusic's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2009
    Location
    florida
    Posts
    1,547
    Quote Originally Posted by The Atheist View Post

    Wouldn't the marmalade stick to your thermal underwear?
    Hum, good question, I guess you remove the buns from the warmer and then remove the thermal underwear, then add the marmalade...Anyway, it seems to work for jelly rolls.

    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    Then there's baps, bloomers and bottom cakes, but lets not go there.
    I found the baps, I have a few friends who look like bottom cakes...what are bloomers?

    Quote Originally Posted by Paulclem View Post
    Stotties in Sunderland and Newcastle - which sounds like a type of underwear, and batches in Coventry, which sounds like some kind of rash.

    You wouldn'twant to replace buns with stotties though - stottie are big, round and flat. They'd look more like an elephant's backside, which might be appropriate for some people - present company excepted - but it's not the image you want to conjure.
    Ah yes, life is over when we begin looking like a stottie...I'm guessing I have about 40 more years.

    Quote Originally Posted by gbrekken View Post
    I have missed a few buttons, but they're some thi8ngs not even would joke about. HAs are one of them. Ask me no questions, and I will tell you no why. It's nice to be friends, but I've no intention of making enemies, here, or anywhere. PEACE
    Join the conversation, my friend. There is nothing more pleasant than sharing a cup, warm buns and conversation.

  13. #2068
    Registered User jocky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    The Simpsons Treehouse. Duh
    Posts
    770
    Blog Entries
    2
    Quote Originally Posted by soundofmusic View Post



    ...what are bloomers?

    Ask Mick's grandma?




    Join the conversation, my friend. There is nothing more pleasant than sharing a cup, warm buns and conversation.
    This is giving me a glow of sentimentality as it brings back happy memories of the tea debate. Started by Atheist I might add. Tea and buns bring out the worst in people, especially in the southern regions. As long as nobody mentions cucumber sandwiches we should be okay.

  14. #2069
    Registered User jocky's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    The Simpsons Treehouse. Duh
    Posts
    770
    Blog Entries
    2
    Quote Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle View Post
    stick to the path and be wary of the Marfa Lights.
    I was going to take up Atheists kind offer of a vacation in Auklaund, but since researching the Marfa lights I am heading for Texas, a ufologists dream. Me and my large extended family will be more than happy Gilliat to stay at your house for a prolonged period. Dont worry about the expense, I will square you up as soon as my first, as yet unwritten novel, is published. I can't wait, we will all mosey on down to Soundo's pad and mooch off her for an indefenite period, everyone knows Floridians are filthy rich. Then to round it all off we will pop in to one of Gbrekken' s English classes in Reno. P.S. Gilly we like our breakfast at 7 am sharp and dont worry about my four rotweillers, they are completely harmless.

  15. #2070
    Clinging to Douvres rocks Gilliatt Gurgle's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2009
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    2,716
    No, no...you don't want to go down there. Remember, Athesit said it is freezing down there at 29 deg.
    My gate is always open to weary travellers and I will make sure we leave the "lights" on for you. Roger on that breakfast at seven sharpe which, by the way, will consist of toasted McSquab, rabbit haunches smothered in buttered grits and warm Wild Turkey.

    We look forward to seeing you, so don't get too attached to Florida.

    Gilliatt
    "Mongo only pawn in game of life" - Mongo

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SKRma7PDW10

Similar Threads

  1. The "I Hate Shakespeare" Thread.
    By The Atheist in forum Shakespeare, William
    Replies: 115
    Last Post: 03-02-2014, 04:00 PM
  2. What makes a good thread?
    By Lioness_Heart in forum General Chat
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 02-08-2010, 09:54 PM
  3. LitNet FAQ Index:
    By Logos in forum The Literature Network
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 04-28-2009, 08:52 AM
  4. The Lit. Net Rate-A-Day Thread
    By misterlit in forum General Literature
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: 09-09-2008, 08:59 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •