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Thread: poverty sight

  1. #1
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    poverty sight

    hot wind swirls down the street
    and coats each verandah
    with evidence of other peoples misery
    the dilapidated armchair out the front
    slouches in real life depression
    a passerby's joy is
    spirited away upon its sight
    the chained mangy dog snarls
    from across the road
    where the dark view outshines
    beautiful flowering jacarandas
    purple pink and red
    their flowers fall like confetti
    on footpaths
    that people of no relevance
    shuffle, skip, swagger or reel
    wild lavender and rosemary perfume
    the air to cover the stench of poverty
    not here, amongst penniless folk
    amid crime, unemployment and pain
    do God-given visions count
    The bursting array of spring colours
    in suburban nature don't matter
    in this place so much
    as if you're black or you're white
    'that isn't true!'
    yes it is and don't deny it.
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  2. #2
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    Well done. It describes its subject even with its rhythm, slowly and surely.
    ...........
    “All" human beings "by nature desire to know.” ― Aristotle
    “Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.” ― Robert A. Heinlein

  3. #3
    Vincit Qui Se Vincit Virgil's Avatar
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    I agree, well done. I particularly liked the most vivid section, this:
    the dilapidated armchair out the front
    slouches in real life depression
    a passerby's joy is
    spirited away upon its sight
    the chained mangy dog snarls
    from across the road
    where the dark view outshines
    beautiful flowering jacarandas
    purple pink and red
    their flowers fall like confetti
    on footpaths
    LET THERE BE LIGHT

    "Love follows knowledge." – St. Catherine of Siena

    My literature blog: http://ashesfromburntroses.blogspot.com/

  4. #4
    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Delta40 View Post
    hot wind swirls down the street
    and coats each verandah
    with evidence of other peoples misery
    the dilapidated armchair out the front
    slouches in real life depression
    Very thought provoking entrance here
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  5. #5
    Registered User paperleaves's Avatar
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    This is truly a masterful work--full of evocative imagery and a delicate bed of despair covered up by your colorful descriptions....
    Incredible work!


    love
    paper
    "real
    loneliness
    is not
    necessarily
    limited to
    when
    you are
    alone
    "
    -C. Bukowski

  6. #6
    chercheur ~Sophia~'s Avatar
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    not here, amongst penniless folk
    amid crime, unemployment and pain
    do God-given visions count
    The bursting array of spring colours
    in suburban nature don't matter
    in this place so much
    as if you're black or you're white
    'that isn't true!'
    yes it is and don't deny it.
    Very powerful and saddening. Why can't we just learn to keep colour out of it! Ovations for not being afraid to say "it" and say it well!!!

  7. #7
    Registered User Delta40's Avatar
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    thank you everyone. I am trying to write in a powerful way - maybe its a phase!
    Before sunlight can shine through a window, the blinds must be raised - American Proverb

  8. #8
    Original Poster Buh4Bee's Avatar
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    You wrote about this subject matter beautifully.

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