Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

[jocky]

Listen all, Jocky has got to leave for a wee while as matters of great import to national security are calling. In the words of General MacArthur I will return, hopefully.

[The Atheist]

Sadly not Atheist, you have brought a tear to my eye as I remember those days when me and Denise sipped cheap cider followed by a couple of kippers between divinity lectures. Happy days

That's a greater disaster than Torrey Canyon!

You will love this one Atheist. Three University Professors of the supernatural came in to explain transubstantiation, they were dressed up for the occasion and looking suitably scary. They came mobhanded just in case some dullard might question them. They explained the body and the blood of Christ at the appointed moment of mass. There was a singular silence, which seemed to go on forever, until some idiot, I forget who, told them to get to f**k. They left in a hurry and one of their number was heard to say ' whatever happened to the good Samaritans ' ?

I love transubstantiation. You can taste the wine turning to blood on the way paste.

Either that, or I bit my tongue at the crap they serve in the RCC.

Maybe we'll just celebrate until Christmas; Sure you're invited . We're interviewing for entertainment; what do you think would make all the gents and lasses smile?

Party till Xmas, I like it!

I'll get Parker to lay supplies in at once!

[soundofmusic]

Guys, did I ever tell you about the time I was nearly awarded the Victoria Cross ? I accidentaly shot the company cook. The whole company signed a petition demanding I should be awarded the highest accolade the army could award, even the cook signed it when he eventually recovered from his horrendous injury. There was much deliberation amongst the top brass but sadly it was not to be. What swung it against me was the cook's wife's complaint that I had shot him in the groin and her life was ruined. Gentlemen, there is a fine dividing line between success and failure in this world. Still Jocky V.C. has a nice ring to it.

Jocky, just saw this old post, I never realized you were a hero: thumbs_up; was the man's cooking that bad. Though, I really don't know what could be that bad; all this talk of herrings in tomato sauce

[The Atheist]

Though, I really don't know what could be that bad; all this talk of herrings in tomato sauce

Herrings in tomato sauce isn't just food, it's commestibly orgasmic!

Tins of herrings in tomato sauce is what created the entire British Empire.

How to beat up people who live 23 weeks travel away from you?

Take cans of nourishing food so you don't die of beriberi on the way there. Top of the nourishing food chain is H in TS. Vitamins, vegetables, protein, calcium... you could feed an army (or navy) on this stuff. And we did. Why do you think we use English on this forum? Ever see any French food in a can? Let's see you try to make a filet de boeuf en croute sandwich!

[soundofmusic]

Party till Xmas, I like it!

I'll get Parker to lay supplies in at once!

I knew I could count on Atheist the Great, Keeper of Justice and Killer of Birds and other small annoying things.
Do you want Brooke Shields at the party also? I don't know, she looks a little too lean; like she's on the exercise bike too long ; She may need you to send out for some fattening American food and good Atheist loving

Herrings in tomato sauce isn't just food, it's commestibly orgasmic!

Tins of herrings in tomato sauce is what created the entire British Empire.

How to beat up people who live 23 weeks travel away from you?

Take cans of nourishing food so you don't die of beriberi on the way there. Top of the nourishing food chain is H in TS. Vitamins, vegetables, protein, calcium... you could feed an army (or navy) on this stuff. And we did. Why do you think we use English on this forum? Ever see any French food in a can? Let's see you try to make a filet de boeuf en croute sandwich!

Well, perhaps we should begin to feed it to our men over here who are going impotent at 40 Orgasmic, really, well maybe I can close my eyes, hold my nose and...No, don't think I can do it. Guess I'll just have to remain celibate and inorgasmic until the next 25 year old, tall, blond haired, blue eyed bloke falls in love with my wallet ,

[papayahed]

Well, perhaps we should begin to feed it to our men over here who are going impotent at 40

I think you maybe hanging out with the wrong crowd.

[soundofmusic]

I think you maybe hanging out with the wrong crowd.

You know, papayahed, I've been wondering about that after meeting all of these hearty British folk...Anyway, my daughter tells me the men I like are all "women with...."

[prendrelemick]

Think carefully before you invite Brooke to the party, you don't want Goji berry and Wheatgrass stains on the carpet.

As for entertainment, If Mr Jelly (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6IK-9...eature=related ) is unavailable, Jocky could do his world famous elephant impression.

[soundofmusic]

Think carefully before you invite Brooke to the party, you don't want Goji berry and Wheatgrass stains on the carpet.

As for entertainment, If Mr Jelly (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6IK-9...eature=related ) is unavailable, Jocky could do his world famous elephant impression.

Mick, you're starting to get scary; where do you find these things? Well, I was inviting Brooke for Atheist; I gave up all that breast feeding, making your own baby food talk years ago. It was hell My first husband was talking about cool stuff with the guys and I was being bored to tears with frightening stories of natural birth.
Fortunately, for the health food crowd and the alcoholics; we have tile is south florida; so no problem with mess Now tell me more about Jockys elephant impression

[Michael T]

Is this still The Blokes Thread





Ah... Thought so.

[jocky]

Is this still The Blokes Thread





Ah... Thought so.

This thread used to be so simple and uncomplicated why cant we get back to simple values, fishing, hunting, beer, sandwiches and war? Thank you Mike for reminding us who we are and the video as it has sentimental value, there is nothing to beat a big pair of eyes.

[jocky]

Now guys, here is a tale that will send tingles down your spines. This is a story for men only, the theme being fishing. I was standing in the river Dee on Royal Deeside up to my neck in waders and I got a tug, it had to be at least a fourteen pound salmon. I will repeat for effect a FOURTEEN POUND SALMON. The battle was on and the gloves were off. Promises were made and broken, Gods were invoked and deals with Lucifer were done , Faustus didn't have a look in, there was much sweating and swearing. Day turned to night, thunder, lightening the net was in my hand and, would you believe it , the line broke ? It leapt about six feet in the air and I am sure it winked at me as it made its way back up river. I am at present suing the fishing tackle shop for ruining my life. Match that

[soundofmusic]

Is this still The Blokes Thread





Ah... Thought so.

Good, I knew the girls would come to my party to entertain the blokes! She's rather hypnotic...Of course, as a woman we can seldom appreciate the value of a good pair of pecs because we are having a deep discussion of whether they are silicone? Shouldn't she have brought a bikini so she can do the water show?

[soundofmusic]

This thread used to be so simple and uncomplicated why cant we get back to simple values, fishing, hunting, beer, sandwiches and war? Thank you Mike for reminding us who we are and the video as it has sentimental value, there is nothing to beat a big pair of eyes.

I think this thread changed when somebody, not naming any names here, on the blokes thread invited all the guys to my birthday party on the Celibacy thread...
I don't know though, I think this is a taking over my really cool friend, jocky, that even has a Scottish brogue when he writes..'

[soundofmusic]

Think carefully before you invite Brooke to the party, you don't want Goji berry and Wheatgrass stains on the carpet.

As for entertainment, If Mr Jelly (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6IK-9...eature=related ) is unavailable, Jocky could do his world famous elephant impression.

Hey Mick, the guys need to get back their bloke thread spirit; do you have something to inspire them with?