Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

[prendrelemick]

Thats so macho, I felt a surge of testosterone just reading it.

[Virgil]

So woodpeckers keep on putting holes in my house, so my family has been at war with them for a while. I just shot one with a crossbow.

Have you tried a statue of a owl, one of trhose plastic things? Someone who had a similar problem tried it and told me it worked for a while. Then the woodpeckers realized it didn't move and felt comfortable going back. It might get you some relief and perhaps if you moved it around you might be able to fake them into thinking it's real.

[Emil Miller]

I have just checked this out on Google and am amazed that they pose a problem in the USA. I have never seen one, although I have occasionally heard them drilling away at trees in woodland but they are very shy birds here in the UK and its virtually impossible to spot them; they are also quite rare. I don't think I could kill one.

[jocky]

You know why women have smaller feet than men, its pretty obvious really, so they can get nearer to the kitchen sink. Scottish beer, of course, is far superior to that American Duff. Well its time to go as I can hear the Amazon's jungle drums beating. If your courageous experiment prospers you will hear from me again, however, I feel that female retribution is swiftly winging its way to you. Best wishes from your fairweather pal, Jocky.

[The Atheist]

You know why women have smaller feet than men, its pretty obvious really, so they can get nearer to the kitchen sink.

I take it you have a deep hidey-hole somewhere stocked with enough food to last about a year of siege after that!

[just mercedes]

Have you tried a statue of a owl, one of trhose plastic things? Someone who had a similar problem tried it and told me it worked for a while. Then the woodpeckers realized it didn't move and felt comfortable going back. It might get you some relief and perhaps if you moved it around you might be able to fake them into thinking it's real.

I used a plastic kite shaped like a hawk, strung between house and sheds - it works on most birds, but woodpeckers are not native here.

[imthefoolonthehill]

*shrug.

My little warning seems to be working.

We'll see if it lasts. If not, maybe plastic owls will adorn my roof.

[prendrelemick]

'Ay up Jockey. The Bay City Rollers are looking good on your avatar

[The Comedian]

I'm building a small post/timber fence to edge my yard from woods it boarders. Pictures to come!

[jocky]

Prendrelmick that was way below the belt. My son in law is from Yorkshire and I have informed him to form a posse right away. There will be no hiding place for you, even in the darkest dales of Yorkshire. Athiest, dont you worry about old Jocky. I know they will be '' knitting their brows like the gaithering storm '' but my survival skills are sharply honed.

[The Atheist]

*shrug.

My little warning seems to be working.

We'll see if it lasts. If not, maybe plastic owls will adorn my roof.

Yes, birds aren't as dumb as we think. When fishing, we often get pagued by muttonbirds which dive down and grab the bait after the line is cast. Killing one and leaving it floating keeps the rest away.

Prendrelmick that was way below the belt. My son in law is from Yorkshire and I have informed him to form a posse right away. There will be no hiding place for you, even in the darkest dales of Yorkshire. Athiest, dont you worry about old Jocky. I know they will be '' knitting their brows like the gaithering storm '' but my survival skills are sharply honed.

[Stargazer86]

Urrgh. Why is it that all hot topics have to do with allowing people to perform the lowest of behavior? And it always seems to be, I wouldn't do it, but others have the right to.

Good news is no news and bad news is best...or however the saying goes.


Where's your avatar, Virgil?

Comedian- How's that fence coming along? Are you doing it by yourself?

[Niamh]

You know why women have smaller feet than men, its pretty obvious really, so they can get nearer to the kitchen sink. Scottish beer, of course, is far superior to that American Duff. Well its time to go as I can hear the Amazon's jungle drums beating. If your courageous experiment prospers you will hear from me again, however, I feel that female retribution is swiftly winging its way to you. Best wishes from your fairweather pal, Jocky.

I take it you have a deep hidey-hole somewhere stocked with enough food to last about a year of siege after that!

You have been warned Jocky! better go crawl into that hole...

[Virgil]

Good news is no news and bad news is best...or however the saying goes.


Where's your avatar, Virgil?

Oh I had changed it and had an issue and had to go back to my regular one.

[jocky]

Crawling now Niahm!