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Thread: Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

  1. #676
    Registered User Stargazer86's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brian Bean View Post
    Now I know this story is hard to swallow, but what's even even more amazing is the name of the newspaper it was reported in ie. Sin Chew Daily.


    Woman bites off lover's penis in car crash
    A secretary involved in an affair with her boss reportedly bit off her lover's penis while performing oral sex in a car.

    Sin Chew Daily and China Press reports that the painful incident occurred in a park in Singapore where the couple met after work.

    The 30-year-old secretary was performing oral sex on her boss when the car was shunted by a reversing van. According to the China Press, the impact of the crash caused the woman to bite off her lover’s organ.

    Karma at its finest! I wonder if thier spouses are having a good laugh over this one.

    Oh, and if you like odd stories, check out msnbc.com and go to thier Weird News section...I believe it's under the U.S. news (although the weird news is not limited to bizarre happenings in the States alone)
    The stories up today are as follows:

    Cow bolts slaughterhouse, milks freedom

    Smuggler Hid 13 Birds in his Pants

    Man Sues Over Right to Wear Skirts in Public

    Girl Finds Condom in Happy Meal (a 7 year old in Switzerland...)

    Plane Crash Lands into Port-o-Potty

    No Pants, No Season for Oregon's Frisbee Team

    Virgin Mary seen on a Griddle

    Man Shoves Officer to Join Brother in Jail

    Vitamin "C" in Man's Oranges is Really Cocaine

    Burgler Steals Only JellyBeans

  2. #677
    Registered User Emil Miller's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stargazer86 View Post
    Karma at its finest! I wonder if thier spouses are having a good laugh over this one.
    I bet the spouse of the guy who lost his most essential piece of equipement isn't going to be happy. Unless, that is, she can find a replacement.

  3. #678
    Bibliophile JBI's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brian Bean View Post
    I bet the spouse of the guy who lost his most essential piece of equipement isn't going to be happy. Unless, that is, she can find a replacement.
    You think it was a clean "off", I just figured that was reporting - I assumed just severe damage, I didn't think actually OFF. Ouch.

  4. #679
    Registered User Stargazer86's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Brian Bean View Post
    I bet the spouse of the guy who lost his most essential piece of equipement isn't going to be happy. Unless, that is, she can find a replacement.
    But if he was having an affair (which will now cause her major public embarassment), she very likely will not want anything to do with it anymore. This just gives her a great chance to stick it to him (no pun intended) in court and milk him dry for alimony (it mentions that he is a boss so he is probably comfortably off..just not in the literal sense).
    When it comes down to it, many men are just horny, selfish jerks, and many women are bloodsucking, selfish leeches. So maybe it will work out for all of them

  5. #680
    Bibliophile JBI's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stargazer86 View Post
    But if he was having an affair (which will now cause her major public embarassment), she very likely will not want anything to do with it anymore. This just gives her a great chance to stick it to him (no pun intended) in court and milk him dry for alimony (it mentions that he is a boss so he is probably comfortably off..just not in the literal sense).
    When it comes down to it, many men are just horny, selfish jerks, and many women are bloodsucking, selfish leeches. So maybe it will work out for all of them
    Or perhaps they actually like each other.

  6. #681
    Registered User Stargazer86's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JBI View Post
    Or perhaps they actually like each other.

    If they like each other, why would he be cheating on her? And out in public in a car, no less...

  7. #682
    Orwellian The Atheist's Avatar
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    And in really important news, the cricket's going rather well!

    Unless you live in Jamaica.
    Go to work, get married, have some kids, pay your taxes, pay your bills, watch your tv, follow fashion, act normal, obey the law and repeat after me: "I am free."

    Anon

  8. #683
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    Get Parker to send Mr Onions a bottle of Bolly



    Hang on! he's from Durham, make that a crate of Newkie.
    Last edited by prendrelemick; 05-08-2009 at 08:17 AM.

  9. #684
    Registered User Emil Miller's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by prendrelemick View Post
    Get Parker to send Mr Onions a bottle of Bolly



    Hang on! he's from Durham, make that a crate of Newkie.



    Don't forget the pork scratchings.

  10. #685
    Bibliophile JBI's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stargazer86 View Post
    If they like each other, why would he be cheating on her? And out in public in a car, no less...
    I'm not talking about the wife, but the secretary.

  11. #686
    now then ;)
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    Thought I'd point out that the good guys won today.
    There once was a scotsman named Drew
    Who put too much wine in his stew
    He felt a bit drunk
    And fell off his bunk
    And landed smack into his shoe
    ~(C) Ms Niamh Anne King

  12. #687
    answers rhetorical ?'s
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    Huzzah! Who're the good guys? (almost forgot that apostrophe there . . .)

  13. #688
    Registered User Stargazer86's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by skib View Post
    Huzzah! Who're the good guys? (almost forgot that apostrophe there . . .)
    Why not just type "who are" (besides the fact that it wouldn't be nearly as amusing)

  14. #689
    answers rhetorical ?'s
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    Quote Originally Posted by Stargazer86 View Post
    Why not just type "who are" (besides the fact that it wouldn't be nearly as amusing)
    I'm lazy and often in a hurry so someone doesn't (does not) beat me to the next post.

  15. #690
    now then ;)
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    the good guys are the glorious glasgow rangers
    There once was a scotsman named Drew
    Who put too much wine in his stew
    He felt a bit drunk
    And fell off his bunk
    And landed smack into his shoe
    ~(C) Ms Niamh Anne King

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