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Thread: An Empty House Remembers (sonnet)

  1. #1
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    An Empty House Remembers (sonnet)

    The empty house around me ticks and creaks,
    A moody end to evening's gentle rains,
    A brooding quiet as the daylight wanes,
    The secret language empty houses speak.

    What stories might this house preserve entire
    In rhythmic code composed of click and groan?
    Does House recall a sadness with each moan?
    Is laughter stored in every plank and wire?

    And how might I, a fleeting visitor,
    Acquire an ear for stories trapped in time,
    And wrap a tale or two in words and rhyme?
    How can I tap the House's secret lore?

    In silence soft the house slips off to sleep.
    Alone I sit, in darkness vast and deep.
    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

    Written in a moment when I was alone, listening to the rain patter down off a roof in an empty house.

  2. #2
    Something's gotta give PrinceMyshkin's Avatar
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    Brilliant title, beautifully carried out by the body of the poem!!!
    "You must be the change you want to see in the world." Gandhi

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    Why thank you! That was one of those euphoric moments I get now and then. The poem was meant to help me remember it.

    Is that you with the lovely babe in arms in the picture?

  4. #4
    Something's gotta give PrinceMyshkin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by thegitksan View Post
    Why thank you! That was one of those euphoric moments I get now and then. The poem was meant to help me remember it.

    Is that you with the lovely babe in arms in the picture?
    Oh no, that's my daugter-in-law Maggie and her younger child, Lucy. I've written about that poem elsewhere

  5. #5
    Registered User windblown's Avatar
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    This sonnet captures perfectly the melancholy beauty of a rainy evening in an empty house. I love the bit of the "rhythmic code composed of click and groan" and think you did wrap House's secret story in wonderful words and rhyme.

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    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
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    Nice. The words seem chosen carefully for maximum effect.
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

  7. #7
    Vincit Qui Se Vincit Virgil's Avatar
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    Nicely done. If I have any qualms it's that the language just sounds like that of a previous era. But it's done perfectly.
    LET THERE BE LIGHT

    "Love follows knowledge." – St. Catherine of Siena

    My literature blog: http://ashesfromburntroses.blogspot.com/

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