Results 1 to 5 of 5

Thread: Leaving Work the Day that Autumn Died

  1. #1
    Registered User Xillus_Xavier's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2007
    Location
    Alabama
    Posts
    142

    Leaving Work the Day that Autumn Died

    I'm wanting to know if this poem is too obscure.
    Let me know your interpretation and overall impression of the poem please.

    Leaving Work the Day that Autumn Died

    Fallen oak leaves bathe on glass.
    Beneath that silica shield I escape
    icy rain from pall-bearing clouds
    carrying old man Autumn away.
    Radiated warmth - a vented breath -
    welcomes my wet and shivering hands
    to inner comforts of the car.
    Shedding I am, a workweeks' wear,
    yet home, and all its finish line glory,
    still waits for me a metal marathon away.

  2. #2
    The Poetic Warrior Dark Muse's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Within the winds
    Posts
    8,905
    Blog Entries
    964
    I do not think it is too obsecure, I thought it was well done with really good imagery. To me the poem is about modern convention putting a distance between man and nature, and the fact that it is so easy to just shut nature out in this day and age.

    Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before. ~ Edgar Allan Poe

  3. #3
    All are at the crossroads qimissung's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2008
    Location
    Lost in the bell's curve
    Posts
    5,123
    Blog Entries
    66
    I think Dark Muse understood the implications better than I, but I loved the imagery!
    "The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its' own reason for existing." ~ Albert Einstein
    "Remember, no matter where you go, there you are." Buckaroo Bonzai
    "Some people say I done alright for a girl." Melanie Safka

  4. #4
    ^My Pen Name^ Justin Rockwell's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2008
    Location
    Alabama
    Posts
    55
    I'm in Alabama too!!

    I'm not catching on to any flaws, so I'd say it's not too obscure, good work.

    please return the feedback...

    http://www.online-literature.com/for...ad.php?t=37748

  5. #5
    Not politically correct Pendragon's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Blue Ridge Mountains, SW VA
    Posts
    21,250
    Blog Entries
    133
    Great Imagery! I had this vision from the title of a girl named "Autumn" dying, perhaps for me the seasons are female since my only daughter is named Summer Dawn and if Ethan had been a girl we would have named Ethan "Autumn Angel".
    Some of us laugh
    Some of us cry
    Some of us smoke
    Some of us lie
    But it's all just the way
    that we cope with our lives...

Similar Threads

  1. Industrial Society Destroys Mind and Environment
    By sushil_yadav in forum Philosophical Literature
    Replies: 213
    Last Post: 12-09-2016, 08:33 PM
  2. Autumn
    By IrishCanadian in forum Personal Poetry
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 01-06-2006, 01:26 AM
  3. When you're tired from work, different work is rest
    By JohnBugay in forum Who Said That?
    Replies: 0
    Last Post: 06-27-2003, 04:15 AM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •