“You’ll come with me right!” she cried desperately.
Kioshi didn’t reply.
“Kioshi! You can’t leave me!” she cried, clutching onto his arm.
“I have to.” he replied tenderly stroking her cheek, brushing away a single tear.
Part of the tunnel began to fill with a pale blue light...
“But,” she started to say. For a instant their eyes met and he searched hers as if making sure of something. She suddenly realized how close they were and her senses became hyped, “but...”
Her words were lost when he rested his hand on her chin. He leaned forward, their lips meeting softly. At that moment when his lips touched hers, she felt her soul soar above the caverns ceiling and into an unknown abyss of emotions, her thoughts confused and lost within what she had known. Tenderly, he slipped his other hand that had been in Auni's grasp and wrapped it around her. Holding her securely, he angled his head to one side so that he may kiss her more deeply. His jaw was strong and steady. His lips firm and gentle.
The light in the tunnel grew till it washed away all signs of the wall. Unwillingly, Auni's tight grip on Kioshi began to loosen. Theirs lips separated and she tried to keep hold of him as she felt herself being pulled away by an invisible, unrelenting force. Two tears burned deep into Kioshi's cheek as he frantically held on. Every barrier Kioshi had ever held against her to hide his emotions had fallen and she saw clearly into his anguished soul. Her own soul felt like it was splitting apart, being called one way but being dragged another. In that simple kiss, she had been opened to a world she had never believed in. She had seen how in her deepest sorrows, Kioshi had always been there. But nothing seemed to be able to hold them together not even her desperate hold.
"Don't let me go!" Auni cried, tears streaming down her cheeks. As she looked at him and saw that he was fading, "Kioshi!" she screamed.
"I don't want to," he whispered, a comforting but heartbreaking expression appeared in his eyes.
"I won't see ever see you again!" she wept.
"It might not be forever..." He stroked her cheek and she placed her hand on his, but she couldn't feel it. She couldn't feel him anymore and then she couldn't see him.
Tirelessly, she fought with all her will and strength against the force, but to no avail. Kioshi was no longer there- lost within the surroundings.
Help!!! again....
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My only thing that I could say would be to make it a little more descriptive, like at the start where they're talking, just to increase the emotion/tension a little, for instance:
Originally Posted by Shurtugal
my mind is all over the place right now, I'm rushing so much that I only wrote half of what I was thinking about it, lol... Anyhow I think you might still be able to use that theory... somehow... actually my mind has just blanked again. Trying to think of a similar emotion to what she would be feeling during the kiss and I can't think of it now! 
You did really well though especially with not really having much knowledge about it 
