This is a column of mine that's going to be published this Monday in a local newspaper. I had tons of fun writing this and wanted to share, since we all have this particular character trait.Cheers.
Fellowship of Geeks
9/07
You’ve seen him before, haven’t you? The glazed-over eyes showing from under horn-rimmed glasses….the muttering in some strange language that has never been used in history…the dark, rumpled clothes…the crippled social skills…in other words, The Geek. Also known as dork, nerd, weirdo, and a plethora of other names that we wear with pride. A geek is a person passionately devoted to a subject in a way that separates him from mainstream fans. Geekiness can run in families or be in isolated cases…all of which can be different. My Dad and my cousin are computer geeks. My Mom is a gardening geek. Most geeks are out in the open, as well, especially since being called a geek is slowly becoming a compliment; a nod to specialized knowledge. Geeks have gained cult status, as shown by the new show Beauty and the Geek. People have taken to naming their children after their favorite characters, like Strider, Mara Jade, Arwen, Lestat, and Eowyn. No joke.
Where do I come in? I’m a Lord of the Rings geek. On the outside, I look boring and unimaginative. I wear glasses (though not horn rims), my clothing style is classic, and my hair is usually put up. A bit of prying, however, will bring out my love. My iPod is filled with over a hundred pictures from the movies and with the complete recordings of the score. I have the lyrics to the songs. I quote both book and movies. I try to steer the conversation to it. The decoupage I made for my bedroom is liberally peppered with my favorite characters and quotes. If I laugh at random things or if I say something strange in conversation it’s usually LOTR(Lord of the Rings) related. I watch the extended edition movies probably once a month. I know a bit of elvish, and I get supremely annoyed when someone makes a mistake when talking about LOTR. That is a typical geek.
What do you do if one comes up to you and starts declaiming whole sections from the book? Let me tell you what an acquaintance of mine said. It shut me up entirely. At a summer camp, I was sitting outside making lanyards with a sweet and popular teenager. Being polite, she started talking with me. Our conversation went something like this:
“So…what do you like to do?” she asked me.
“I’m a Lord of the Rings geek.” (I didn’t want to scare her off by gushing.)
“I LOVE Lord of the Rings!”
“Who’s your favorite character?” (Big smile on my face.)
“The king.” She said.
“Aragorn?”
“No, no. The REAL king!” I could feel my grin start to shrink. There are some five or six kings in Lord of the Rings.
“Theoden?” I asked.
“The blond one. You know, the one who has the hot blonde son and the niece.”
By now my hopes are thoroughly dashed. Blonde!? Hot!? And he’s NOT his son!
“Yeah, that’d be Theoden and Eomer and Eowyn. But Eomer isn’t Theoden’s son, he’s his nephew. And him and Eowyn are siblings.”
“What, really?” she said.
I went into a ten-minute long explanation, trying to tell her who everybody is. After I finished, she paused a bit. “Yeah,” she said finally. “You might not want to say that out in public.”
I laughed. The advice was kindly meant. “I told you I’m a geek!” I protested. She looked like she wanted to run and hide.
That is how to squash a geek. And now that I’ve proclaimed my geekhood to the entire Bay Area, I want to close with this nod to all fellow geeks: you’re not alone.



Cheers.
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! Oh well, need to find another name for future kids now.




