No you haven't left us confused. The whole area of mental health is highly confusing. No need to apologise.
No you haven't left us confused. The whole area of mental health is highly confusing. No need to apologise.
Previously JonathanB
The more I read, the more I shall covet to read. Robert Burton The Anatomy of Melancholy Partion3, Section 1, Member 1, Subsection 1
I am sure the voices come from you. Our world is constructed entirely within our brain. And I still think they are drawing on your own experiencies. But the way the voices manifest themselves - as another person separate from you with a different agenda from you, is interesting and a bit frightening. That is something most people don't experience.
Last edited by prendrelemick; 10-21-2016 at 04:32 AM.
ay up
Totoro, your posts are far from confusing. I offer a few thoughts.
Contrary to Prendrelemick, I understand most people do hear voices that seem to come from outside but instantly correct each impression where evidence suggests otherwise. Moreover, they quickly forget each impression as unimportant, and get on with living. Maintaining perspective, moment by moment, is crucial for all of us.
The mentally ill tend to find correction and maintaining perspective more difficult through lack of sleep, exercise, sunlight and good food to sustain the body; substance abuse; trauma; and lack of resilience and imagination among other things. Maintaining a healthy body fosters a healthy mind. (Recent research on the connection between diet, gut bacteria and brain function is just one example.) With such gross disadvantages, all manner of healthy and stimulating activities - mental, physical and social interactions - are increasing supplanted by unhealthy introspection, including the dwelling on voices.
With these disadvantages, many attractive paths close before the mentally ill. It is scarcely surprising that they behave in atypical ways. Access to religion is one pathway still open and, by no means, the worst. And religion's bread and butter is good and evil, angels and demons. Much of the Bible, for instance, is brimming with flights of the imagination, including the hearing of voices.
"Love does not alter the beloved, it alters itself"
Totoro,
Just a few thoughts, I hope they will help somehow.
You arenīt confusing at all, on the contrary, you are very lucid and very brave about your condition.
And be it though medication, therapy, religion or even art (you describe yourself as "starving artist" in your profile) you have the strong will to help yourself and a have been able to do a lot for yourself already. Congratulations!
As for the religious content of your voices, there are two things that occur to me. Itīs certainly not a conscious choice. There are different narratives: the alien narrative, the political narrative and others. I believe the religious narrative is very usual because people know the stories, even if they donīt practice the religion. And also because religion offers solace and protection against aflictions that escape the control of reason. I mean, there are the devils, who have to be reigned in, but there are the angels of light too offering their help.
Last edited by Danik 2016; 10-21-2016 at 07:53 AM.
"I seemed to have sensed also from an early age that some of my experiences as a reader would change me more as a person than would many an event in the world where I sat and read. "
Gerald Murnane, Tamarisk Row
Although I have not been diagnosed as mentally ill there is this chatter in my head. As prendrelemick suggests, I am modern enough to assume it is "me" creating this chatter, but then sometimes I wonder where the ideas come from. These ideas seem like they originate from some place "other" than me. For example, I "heard" one morning that I would get a good idea today and then later I did get an idea that kept me busy for weeks. So the chatter is making predictions about the future chatter. From my perspective, believing in muses, angels and even demons is rather easy.
However, I have noticed that the chatter is more positive when I am rested, as you point out, Gladys. I already turn off the advice of this chatter when I am tired. I have also tried reciting phrases, or mantrams as Eknath Easwaran calls them. This seems to make the chatter more positive, for me at any rate. Also, consciously maintaining a good posture, that is, keeping the back straight when sitting or walking, helps, too. The idea to try this came from Will Johnson who incorporates "Rolfing" into his meditation practices.
In my case, I don't want to turn this chatter off. I look forward to it. I only want to keep it positive.
That sounds distressing, Delta. You have always struck me as a plucky and resilient sort of person. Perhaps your situation has made you stronger. I apologize if that sounds presumptuous, by the way. It's always easy to find the bright side of someone else's problems. I wish you well in any case.
Last edited by Pompey Bum; 10-21-2016 at 11:14 AM.
Again, thank you everyone for your thoughts and experiences on the matter, Delta - I hope you can find some peace in your condition, but just know you aren't alone. Danik, thank you for the compliments. I do appreciate art very much.