that is true, and yet another proof that evading reality will not get you far.
that is true, and yet another proof that evading reality will not get you far.
“the sense of being which in calm hours arises, we know not how, in the soul, is not diverse from things, from space, from light, from time, from man, but one with them and proceeds obviously from the same source.... Here is the fountain of action and of thought....
My problem has been always seeing only my faults. I think narcissism is a result of not beeing appreciated and loved. If you don`t feel supports of others or you are alone you try to find the reason of it. For instance, you say: i ma too good, beautiful, genius but nobody understands me.
Originally Posted by hypatia_
Why would you want to? If you, the one who knows yourself best, don't love yourself, then why would anyone love you?
unfortunately, the people I know who do yoga tend to be more narcissistic: they tend to feel that doing yoga makes them better than everyone around them.
NB: I have nothing against yoga, just AmCan (American/Canadian.....you know, explaining my abbreviation makes it redundant) culture surrounding yoga.
I wrote a poem on a leaf and it blew away...
The best way to overcome narcissism is with a healthy does of Self Loathing.
LOL
Narcissisism springs from Self Loathing. Why do you think he/she has to look at the image all day long?
Break all your mirrors and avoid reflective surfaces. Alternatively, evolve into a daffodil
What do you think the culture of yoga in the West is like compared to the East?
Agreed. I've noticed a lot of times, the image people project is the opposite of their internal conflict.
“the sense of being which in calm hours arises, we know not how, in the soul, is not diverse from things, from space, from light, from time, from man, but one with them and proceeds obviously from the same source.... Here is the fountain of action and of thought....
Don't loathe yourself (that causes even more problems) and don't continuously bolster yourself up (which is what narcissism probably is - overcompensation). Instead, think about something other than yourself.
__________________
"Personal note: When I was a little kid my mother told me not to stare into the sun. So once when I was six, I did. At first the brightness was overwhelming, but I had seen that before. I kept looking, forcing myself not to blink, and then the brightness began to dissolve. My pupils shrunk to pinholes and everything came into focus and for a moment I understood. The doctors didn't know if my eyes would ever heal."
-Pi
The best way to avoid it is to lose yourself in work, relationships and art. Another way is to meditate upon the greatness of persons like Shakespeare and Einstein and Matin Luther King, thereby putting your own positive attributes into perspective. Christians do this with Christ, Buddhists with the Buddha, and if done rightly it is very efficacious at instilling a sense of humility. I have enough negative qualities and tendencies to counterbalance what might be exceptional about me that if I am being honest with myself narcissism isn't really a possibility. The only times it becomes an issue is when I first start a relationship with a young woman. With my looks and my charm and without the length of time required for my deep flaws to perceptibly emerge they often think I am quite literally perfect. They become infatuated and shamelessly heap hyperbolic praise upon me so relentlessly that I begin to believe in their false idealization of me and as a result become an arrogant self-satisfied disgrace.
“To practice any art, no matter how well or badly, is a way to make your soul grow. So do it.”
- Kurt Vonnegut
I am a narcissist. There is a psychological scale for diagnosing narcissism. I was surprised to learn that I score very high on the scale.
I am a perfectionist, but I am painfully aware that I cannot be absolutely perfect, and everything that is good about me will fade away and be lost. This doesn't just make me want to die, it makes me want to destroy myself. It's quite difficult for the people who have opted to be close to me.
I care about people, but I am self obsessed. My father died young. My mother went insane. I made myself. Narcissism isn't just self love. It's an unhealthy fixation. Narcissists do not feel good. I suggest further reading on the subject.
As for overcoming it, a person can school the way they treat others. I do not think it is possible to fix the internal condition.
What seems to characterise the narcissists I know are meteoric, instantaneous swings from good humour to irritation, annoyance and aggression. In these negative moods they are impervious to reason, and view everything in the worst light. They seem emotionally shallow and unstable, once you get to know them well. But when they are good, they are very, very good!
As for overcoming narcissism, all symptoms are amenable to surface change but the underlying world view is likely impregnable. They protect themselves, like armadillos, from emotional probing of any sort. Having allowed limited emotional engagement, having gained little emotional wisdom, I suppose they have good reason to feel vulnerable.
"Love does not alter the beloved, it alters itself"
if it's caused by limiting emotional engagement, then it would be interesting to see what the reason for that is. traumatic experience/childhood/etc. i am of a firm belief that anyone can change, but those scenarios are tough. some people don't even remember what it is that made them be so antisocial anymore. and if they can't remember it, they can't confront it.
If their self esteem is healthy, probably far too healthy, why would they see a need to change?
"Love does not alter the beloved, it alters itself"
Posting Permissions
Reply With Quote
