Your "Free Range" Eggs Are BS

[YesNo]

The colour of the egg is down to the breed of the bird. It makes no difference to flavour or quality which are more influenced by diet.

True fact (courtesy of QI)

That's what I was hoping to hear. We'll probably continue to buy the brown colored eggs since my wife likes that color on them. They look more like real eggs to us at the moment.

[YesNo]

I was fencing on a large free-range chicken farm and all the chickens stayed inside the shed! The hatches were open, but it was freezing and they had more sense than to leave their warm shed. We there for a week and saw about three chickens brave the outdoors.

Although they might enjoy some freedom, I think chickens prefer the security of a penned location, not so much to keep them in as to keep other predatory animals out.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I feel sad when I see cows being mistreated, but I've never felt the same when it came to chickens. They just seem so dumb. Come on, you can chop a chocken's head off and it'll still run around. I just don't think sadness or fear is possible for that animal.

[YesNo]

I feel sad when I see cows being mistreated, but I've never felt the same when it came to chickens. They just seem so dumb. Come on, you can chop a chocken's head off and it'll still run around. I just don't think sadness or fear is possible for that animal.

When I was a child I would help my dad slaughter chickens. He would place their head on a log of firewood set upright and use an axe to remove the head. Their wings do flap around after the shock of losing their head. I don't know what causes that. Perhaps death is not instantaneous once the head has been removed. I have heard that people have seen the eyes of the condemned blinking after they were guillotined, but I can't verify that.

My dad ultimately got rid of all animals and only grew grain because he did not want to slaughter any of them.

There are probably more humane ways to kill chickens, but I think they know they are going to die and they feel fear but they can't do anything about it. They may even feel betrayed, but that might be hard to argue.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

It's because the part of the brain, particularly the kind that controls motor functions, is low on the chicken's neck, so if you don't chop far enough down, it can live. There's actually a chicken that lived for months after having its head chopped off. The family fed it with an eye-dropper and put it on display at carnivals.

Edit: I just found the Wikipedia article. His name was Mike.

[JuniperWoolf]

^Yeah, but that's just motor function in the hind brain, the majority of the brain is removed so it's like you're giving them an über lobotomy. You could do something similar to humans, so removing part of an animal's brain doesn't prove that it doesn't suffer when it experiences elongated stress. I personally really like chickens, they're one of my favorite animals (much to my boyfriend's mockery). My dad's side is Sask. farmers, I always liked watching the chickens walk (bob, bob, bob, bob), and I like how fluffy they are, their stomach feathers are really soft. They're stupid, but most animals are stupid.

But that's not the point, it doesn't bother me that people who could care less about them aren't protesting in the streets for chicken welfare, I take issue with the fact that North Americans are being tricked with the phrase "free-range eggs," that's not right. If people want to buy something under the impression that it's causing less animal suffering, it should actually cause less animal suffering. What's more, outside of buying eggs at a farmer's market and asking the farmer who harvested those eggs (and there aren't any farmers markets in rural Alberta anyway), these people don't have the option to buy eggs or meat that they know was harvested in a way they accept as humane because the food labeling system here is so unspecific.

I do wonder whether that article Juniper posted is perhaps indulging in a spot of fear-mongering though?

Cracked is a humor site ("America's only humor site since 1958!"). The hyperlinks throughout which serve as "proof" are generally from science and news sites, though.

Although they might enjoy some freedom, I think chickens prefer the security of a penned location, not so much to keep them in as to keep other predatory animals out.

Well, they've been domesticated for thousands of years (are there even wild chickens?), so that's generations upon generations of chickens being bred for agriculture life, artificially selected for plumpness, egg production &c, not their ability to defend themselves and survive in the wild. I don't think the species would even exist if we didn't need them for eggs and meat, they're too helpless. Still, I understand that many people can't afford to buy fancy meat, eggs and milk from animals which suffered as little as possible, but it would be nice to have the option.

[MystyrMystyry]

Actually I think the brown eggs are wholemeal eggs (Whaa whaa! Stop me! Somebody stop me!)

The Kentucky Fried Chicken Corporation did quite a bit to prevent chicken suffering back in the seventies when it was found that they were using the cheaper rabbit meat in place of poultry. It contained so many chemicals for flavour and tenderising it was actually poison. They recovered market share by changing their name to KFC*.

Apparently free chicken meat is yummy, but though we did have a rooster at one point (Fred) which was acquired as a purple coloured chick from a fair, my infant mind was so scarred when I saw them lob its head off and then had to witness the nightmare spectacle of its body run around the yard spurting blood - well I couldn't eat it, and didn't. Couldn't even eat the vegetables so had cornflakes for dinner instead.



*Sorry, can't find a link - but it is true.

[billl]

My dad's side is Sask. farmers, I always liked watching the chickens walk (bob, bob, bob, bob), and I like how fluffy they are, their stomach feathers are really soft. They're stupid, but most animals are stupid.

Man, I love the chickens around here--the neighbors have some and they roam across several people's yards for grubs and fire ants, etc. (seriously, when the chickens showed up, suddenly no more fire ant problems EVER again). They are 100% primed to spaz out if something unusual happens, and they move around pretty herky-jerky, but they aren't quite as dumb as that motion makes them look.

But that's not the point, it doesn't bother me that people who could care less about them aren't protesting in the streets for chicken welfare, I take issue with the fact that North Americans are being tricked with the phrase "free-range eggs," that's not right. If people want to buy something under the impression that it's causing less animal suffering, it should actually cause less animal suffering. What's more, outside of buying eggs at a farmer's market and asking the farmer who harvested those eggs (and there aren't any farmers markets in rural Alberta anyway), these people don't have the option to buy eggs or meat that they know was harvested humanely because the food labeling system here is so unspecific and unregulated.

Well, they have been domesticated for thousands of years (are there even wild chickens?), so that's generations upon generations of chickens being bred for agriculture life, artificially selected for plumpness, egg production &c, not their ability to defend themselves and survive in the wild. I don't think the species would even exist if we didn't need them for eggs and meat, they're too helpless. Still, I understand that many people can't afford to buy fancy meat, eggs and milk from animals which suffered as little as possible, but it would be nice to have the option.

I used to see "wild chickens" (grouse) and "wild turkeys" (wild turkeys) where I liked to go hiking in Virginia. Those animals definitely had different behavior than the domestic versions. The turkeys roamed around in a dispersed flock, lurching distances, and then lookng around secretly, for food (best I could tell), and the grouse pretty much stayed absolutely hidden in bushes and leaves, and stayed completely quiet if anyone was in the area, and then shot off like a torpedo with a surprising "wooo" noise if "a threat" happened to get within 10-15 yards of them. They are like booby traps, kind of. (EDIT: actually, the Turkeys seemed to do the same sort of "suddenly fly for a while then crawl around" like the grouse, but the Turkeys fly further, don't hide as desperately, and are more casual about it--and do it as a flock)

The chickens in my neighborhood seem pretty vulnerable, compared to grouse--but a big rooster and the feisty hens are generally MORE than enough to dissuade the starving, feral cats eyeing chicks. For the most part anyhow, generally.

Actually, the hens are quite beautiful, and the chicks are of course VERY cute. The males in the particular species we got around here are pretty colorful, but the Number One Rooster Dude is something spectacular, the sort of guy you see on plates hung on the wall of a dining room. And he isn't dumb. I've seen him stand stock still, cool as ice, as a German Shepherd sprinted right at him in open space, recognizing that the dog would reach the end of his chain less than three yards from where the rooster was standing (something the youngish shepherd hadn't yet figured out). And this dog didn't always wear that chain out there...

Like other animals, chickens will learn things about people--in particular, they will figure out who might feed them. But another interesting thing is this: the rooster provides the best example of "gentlemanly" or "chivalrous" behavior I have ever personally seen in an animal. Apparently, if he doesn't leave lot of food lying around for the hens, they start to appreciate him less... So, although a rooster will sometimes grab the king's share of food available, the most common thing to see is him allowing the hens to fight over it as he struts around the vicinity, not eating much of any of it at all, just keeping an eye out for trouble and pecking at any other boys that might want to be part of the event. Yeah, actually, they also make it a point to pretty much deny other males of every opportunity to eat, when they can...

Sounds simple, but sometimes these things end up in delicate balances, and interesting decisions get made. (And, yes, sometimes stupid decisions too.) But I don't think they're as dumb as they sometimes look--that jerky and spazzy behavior is just a sort of "strategy" or "mode" or something. It's not quite the same as seeing humans spazzing out about stuff.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

We're tricked by a lot of phrases. Here's another: when it's claimed something is made with 100% anything, like, "Our burgers are made with 100% beef." Well, sure the beef part of the burger is surely 100% beef, and who knows which part of the cow.

[JuniperWoolf]

I used to see "wild chickens" (grouse) and "wild turkeys" (wild turkeys) where I liked to go hiking in Virginia.

Ohhh, grouse are wild chickens. We have those here, they make a really weird noise. It sounds like a ball falling down the stairs, you can heare it from pretty far away.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hgh7n...eature=related

We're tricked by a lot of phrases.

"Collateral damage? That doesn't sound so bad!"

[Alexander III]

A couple of year ago I was in Malta for summer, and I stooped by a MCdonalds and they had a huge advertisement saying "our French fries are now made of 100% potatoes"

It was the greatest marketing fail I have seen to date..

[YesNo]

And he isn't dumb. I've seen him stand stock still, cool as ice, as a German Shepherd sprinted right at him in open space, recognizing that the dog would reach the end of his chain less than three yards from where the rooster was standing (something the youngish shepherd hadn't yet figured out). And this dog didn't always wear that chain out there...

I've seen that happen. It makes me wonder which species is more stupid, dogs or chickens.

The last handful of chickens I was around were truly free-range. They could go anywhere, but stayed near the house. The dog we had had to be chained. The chickens knew exactly how far the dog's leash allowed it to go and they would walk right up to the circumference of the dog's space and just cross over. When they did that, the dog would lurch at them. They would turn around and rush away making squawking noises as if to say, "Help! The big, bad dog is gonna get us!" Then they would go back and try again.

Maybe they were trying to make friends with the dog, but I suspect they were deliberately tormenting it. It was the closest thing they had to a thrill ride at an amusement park.

[Calidore]

I feel sad when I see cows being mistreated, but I've never felt the same when it came to chickens. They just seem so dumb. Come on, you can chop a chocken's head off and it'll still run around. I just don't think sadness or fear is possible for that animal.

Chickens definitely feel fear. A friend and I once went to get some chicken for his grandmother at the butcher shop she goes to. They kept live chickens in a stack of wall cages, and when chicken was ordered, they'd pull one out and a few minutes later, give you fresh meat. Those birds screamed constantly whenever anyone walked near the cages.

I've seen that happen. It makes me wonder which species is more stupid, dogs or chickens.

The last handful of chickens I was around were truly free-range. They could go anywhere, but stayed near the house. The dog we had had to be chained. The chickens knew exactly how far the dog's leash allowed it to go and they would walk right up to the circumference of the dog's space and just cross over. When they did that, the dog would lurch at them. They would turn around and rush away making squawking noises as if to say, "Help! The big, bad dog is gonna get us!" Then they would go back and try again.

Maybe they were trying to make friends with the dog, but I suspect they were deliberately tormenting it. It was the closest thing they had to a thrill ride at an amusement park.

That's a funny story.

A few years ago, a nearby park had some significant standing water left over from a flood. I was walking by and saw a dog running through the water at a group of ducks. They flew up and settled on the other side of the "pond", and the dog immediately ran over there. They took off again to the other side, the dog followed, repeat. The dog was clearly having a great time; not sure the ducks were.

[Lokasenna]

To add to the growing pool of 'chickens are really dumb' stories, I was amused by some particularly idiotic speciens last year...

I was helping a friend clean up his allotment, which meant turning over the soil once we'd got rid of all the weeds. The allotment next door had chickens roaming about, and was seperated from ours by a chain-link fence. The gaps in this fence were just about big enough for a chicken to squeeze its head through, but because the feathers back up against the chain it made it very difficult for them to get their heads back through. I had great fun watching the chickens stick their heads through hoping to find something in the turned earth, get stuck, and then proceed with much frantic squaking and thrashing to finally get their heads back through the fence. Sure enough, though, after a few seconds they'd stick there heads back through for a second, third, fourth time, and so on.

Really, really stupid creatures.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I've had four dogs and they've all done that before, though nt multiple times.