what attracts you first?

[cacian]

to the opposite or same sex?

usually we know straight away when we see the person that we like them because something physically or maybe something else did it for us.

[Emil Miller]

to the opposite or same sex?

usually we know straight away when we see the person that we like them because something physically or maybe something else did it for us.

Petiteness, if there is such a word. In a world that seems dedicated to the survival of the fattest, small is indeed beautiful.

[Helga]

I'm not original at all and it may sound like a cliche but I notice eyes first.

[JuniperWoolf]

I think there are different types of people, like combinations of traits that re-occur fairly often. One specific trait isn't really enough to base attraction on. For males, I noticed I especially gravitate towards:

1. Messy-brown-hair-with-glasses types
2. Pale-skin-black-hair-and-blue-eyes types

This is all initial physical stuff though because that's what the OP asked, there's a lot more to attraction than that.

For girls that I find especially aesthetically pleasing, it's cutesy-types with red or blonde hair.

An example of "cutesy":

[PoeticPassions]

Totally off topic,but I have been meaning to say this for a while:Juniper, the text/quote in your signature is so great. Every time I read it, I somehow feel wiser and astounded.

As for the question in the thread-- I would also agree with Juniper about a combination of traits, though there are generally physical traits in men that I tend to consciously or subconsciously find attractive (e.g. a strong jaw line, high cheekbones, light eyes and/or long lashes)... but as far as attraction goes, for me it is usually something inexplicable... just a certain chemistry or spark. I think it has a lot to do with smell (love is half in smells) and possibly hormones, but I always know if there is a potential for something with someone within the first few minutes of talking to them. Or sometimes even before talking... I need to feel chemistry, otherwise no amount of good looks or even great conversation will make me feel (sexually and romantically) attracted to a person.

[JuniperWoolf]

Totally off topic,but I have been meaning to say this for a while:Juniper, the text/quote in your signature is so great. Every time I read it, I somehow feel wiser and astounded.

You can thank Darren Aronofsky for that one.

[paradoxical]

If she's crazy, I'm usually attracted to her. I'm always drawn to the crazy ones. I don't know why.

[Lokasenna]

Evidence of a brain..?

Perhaps that's a little harsh, but I am attracted to intelligence above all else. The most gorgeous woman in the world wouldn't much interest me if she couldn't support a decent conversation.

[cacian]

Evidence of a brain..?

Perhaps that's a little harsh, but I am attracted to intelligence above all else. The most gorgeous woman in the world wouldn't much interest me if she couldn't support a decent conversation.

Haha everyone has a brain so it is a bit difficult so what do you actually mean by a decent conversation?

[stlukesguild]

Now Emil... haven't we had this discussion before somewhere? I still suspect you are drawn toward those diminutive Asian women who are faithful, devoted and compliant. I've always leaned toward the other side of the spectrum. Not exactly being small, I've always preferred "voluptuous":





Must be why I love Rubens so much:



Luckily... in spite of the fact that my wife stands a foot shorter than be, she most certainly is voluptuous.

As for Lokasenna's comment... well it certainly seems the right thing to say. We can't go about admitting that we are just attracted to another human being based upon something as shallow as appearances now can we?

I do agree that in the long run other elements come into play... such as intelligence, personality, and even shared interests.

Interestingly enough, my wife's area of expertise (nursing) is quite removed from my own. We're actually quite different in many ways... but she is supportive of my interests and I of hers... and so far it's worked out.

[Lokasenna]

Haha everyone has a brain so it is a bit difficult so what do you actually mean by a decent conversation?

Well, you know, someone who is both interesting and interested. Someone who feels easy talking about things that matter. Someone who's abiding characteristic is curiousity. Someone who looks at the world and really thinks about it, and is happy to talk it through.

[Jack of Hearts]

Evidence of a brain..?

Perhaps that's a little harsh, but I am attracted to intelligence above all else. The most gorgeous woman in the world wouldn't much interest me if she couldn't support a decent conversation.

Dear Loka,

Agreed, intelligence is like gas on the fire, but what about the first ten seconds' impression of someone? You must've felt that. How could you think anybody was smart within the first ten seconds? Maybe poise?






J


EDIT: And also lol at stlukes

[Emil Miller]

Now Emil... haven't we had this discussion before somewhere? I still suspect you are drawn toward those diminutive Asian women who are faithful, devoted and compliant. I've always leaned toward the other side of the spectrum. Not exactly being small, I've always preferred "voluptuous":

OK then have this one on me.

[Alexander III]

1)Small, brown hair, delicately roundish, small nose, large eyes, little lips of red, milky breasts, small and gentle hands and feet, satin skin of either arabian olive or northern pale snow or sun ripened blonde. That is what inspires love.

2) Voluptuous and older and brown haired. That is what inspires the great lust.

3) Brains are always secondary to Character. To alter an Oscar Wilde epigram - "there is no such thing as an intelligent or a stupid woman, there only exist dull women and fascinating women"

[ClaesGefvenberg]

usually we know straight away when we see the person that we like them because something physically or maybe something else did it for us.

Thus far, we have...

• Petiteness
• Eyes
• Cutesy
• Messy-brown-hair-with-glasses types
• Pale-skin-black-hair-and-blue-eyes types
• Crazy
• Evidence of a brain
• Rubens
• and so on....

...but I would like to add something that can be spotted before all of those, from a hundred yards away: Graceful movement. That alone can spark your interest, and then, if you like what you see when you get closer, those other traits can do their job.

/Claes