To Swear Or Not To Swear

[MarkBastable]

Actually, there is one word that will usually offend me. That word is 'retard'.

As I go out of my way to make it plain that I disagree with you when that's the case, it seems only fair that I make the effort when I agree with you.

I agree with you.

[MarkBastable]

Considering that I'm over 6 ft. tall and over 250 lbs and often sport a rather surly-looking beard there aren't too many guys that would actually take the chance of saying something like that too me.

But, still, what would you have done?

[PoeticPassions]

sometimes swearing has a cathartic effect... or when I stub my toe, I usually swear.

I generally do not find most swear words that offensive... I think as an insult they are rather bland (well in English at least) and not so creative. I can be far more insulted by really clever comments that are meant to degrade me or subtle patronizing words... But I will add that I do find one word quite offensive, and I would never use it to describe a woman... and that is the word used for female genitalia starting with c and ending with nt.

[JuniperWoolf]

Alex and Darcy are taking what I said too much to heart, I'm not foaming-at-the-mouth and calling you insensitive condescending douchebags. I've known men who try chivalry with me, I consider them kind of cute and childish, I continue to present myself in the way I choose and they generally get the hint right away and stop trying to censor themselves. I honestly don't feel that strongly about this issue, talking to a woman with "chivalry" doesn't put me out, it puts you at a disadvantage because I can walk all over you (and I will, for the lol's). I simply prefer to make friends and lovers who are smart enough to see me for what I am and brave enough to behave accordingly.

I don't think its men looking on women as weak. Its respect. The two most important people in most men's lives are a man's mother and his wife. I may belong to a prior century but I lament the near total loss of chivalry. Women bring us into this world, give us life, and to live is to love and it is woman that we love most. No matter what cultural developments take place, all decent men will forever feel it imperative to protect the feminine and regard women as special. Furthermore, women may not be weak, but they will always be in need of good men to protect them from the bad, whether that means a brother or husband acting out of love or a cop just doing his job.

The number of female cops is sharply on the rise, and men need protection from the police as well. How many times have you actually physically defended a damsel in distress? That's not the modern world. Size and relative strength counts for very little in the modern age. Success depends on your brain, and safety depends on your gun.

My mother raised me to always behave like a gentleman, and treat women like princesses. At the end of the day there is not one woman in the world who does not wish to be treated princess, and the feminists tend to be the ones who were never treated with respect, and their rage is not directed towards men, but to other women, who are treated like princesses by men. It is all envy. I will concede that it is not equal, that is the point, for the man to show himself subservient towards the woman.

I don't like the feminist movement, because they pushed a law in the 1970's which entailed that cheerleading shouldn't be considered a sport and it passed. The reason why they don't want it to be a "sport" is because they don't want it to be officially recognized by the general public. They don't want girls to be seen as people who like dancing and looking pretty. The problem is, very many girls DO like dancing and looking pretty (dancing isn't for me, but I myself sure do like dressing up pretty) and all the feminist movement accomplished in making a law to inhibit cheerleading from being considered a "sport" is that funding for cheerleading safety regulation is now next to nil. Cheerleading is dangerous as **** and now it has a higher number of both serious and non-life threatening injuries than every other sport combined (look it up) because they don't even have trained safety staff or regulation mats to fall on, and have the head honchos of the feminist movement so much as batted an eye? No, they sure as **** haven't. They care more about the IMAGE of women suiting their own worldview, they want women to change to become what they want women to be. They don't care about the safety of REAL girls and women, that's literally ANTI-female. Don't call me a feminist.

Anyway, personal issues aside, I honestly don't want princess treatment, and I wouldn't be treated like a princess unless you have aspergers and can't pick up on communication cues in language, tone and facial expression. Talk to me for five minutes and you WILL pick up on my personality and adjust yourself accordingly, that's how human interaction works. Some women are different, some WANT to be coo-ed at and so they'd arrange your social interaction to pull that behavior out of you (which puts YOU at a huge disadvantage, if you want my opinion). You would come to learn very quickly through direct interaction with them that they expect you to be a "gentleman," and that's their choice (and your choice whether or not you follow their lead). They aren't the majority though, and neither am I. Most women probably don't even think about it, they're just being themselves. You can't expect all women to be exactly the same, or to be "mostly into being treated like a princess" or "mostly spit and curse like a sailor," we have personalities just like everyone else.

(except for your dislike of my favorite book )

Well really, The Great Gatsby?!? It's so - no, no, I'll leave it alone...

but my husband would never use the c word because of these reasons;
he finds it disrespectful
he thinks it's inappropriate in ALL situations
He is also the most "feminist" man I know. He treats women as equals, he loves smart, funny women who can challenge him intellectually, many of his favorite poets, singers, songwriters are women. I could go on.
At the same time, he opens doors for me all the time, has me order first in a restaurant.
These are the reasons I married him, and the one clue to his character was that he is able to be friends with women.

My boyfriend is almost exactly the same way with the word "b*tch," and the rest of your description of your husband matches my boyfriend exactly. He thinks it will hurt my feelings. What's annoying is that he's right, it does hurt a little. That word, which has nothing to do with my anatomy or our sexual inclinations (like "slut" - I've had some great retorts to words like "slut" over the years, haha!), exists for the purpose of equating me with a dog, less than human because I have a vagina. There's no way to argue against it using a clever little thing that I can come back with that makes an accurate and precise counter-point. Still, I don't want anyone to ban or censor this word on my account. The existence of the word b*tch makes us stronger, as does everything which hurts. We are considered less than human by some people - better we're aware of that fact and try to change it through our own behavior than have daddy (or as more commonly the case, "big sister," ie. the feminist movement) strip that word from the English vocabulary so we can pretend that everything is "nice."

You see more male CEOs and surgeons and politicians not only because of bias against women (which I believe is definitely out there and a significant contributor to the phenomenon) but because not all women hold up professional success up as the ultimate goal while that is precisely the case with most men. The current state of affairs, where a woman can choose to be independent or dependent, can look at a female Secretary of State, head of the IMF or German Chancellor and think "I can do anything I want," while still knowing she has the option of marrying, having children and making a home, to me that's a fine circumstance.

It's also TIME. The way you think, that women and men are intellectually equal, is the purveying opinion in today's world and that puts women in a great position to succeed (and they're acting on it) for which I'll always be greatful towards pre-1960's feminists and sufferegettes. This wasn't the way of the world before they fought and won our social and professional liberty. Most CEOs ect. were just starting out roughly forty years ago. They're at the top after decades of work. Forty years ago, women weren't starting with the intention of being on top, so you can't expect them to be at the top yet, not today, they haven't put in the time. We're just STARTING within the last few decades, at the bottom, with the other men who are starting today, in this atmosphere of gender intellectual and professional equality. Give it another forty years, another few decades of struggle and work and promotion for the people who are at the bottom in professional fields TODAY, and you'll see that those women who are starting out will, in the future, hold a greater chunk of the upper-tier jobs.

I don't swear with the intention of offending someone. I do it once in a while to punctuate or add flare to a conversation. It's hilarious because I'm adorable.

I’m liking you more and more.

I said they are not weak. You misread it and I understand. My viewpoint is not savoury.

Your point is that we’re small and people like to rape us. That's true, that’s just biology, denying facts only ends up screwing us in the end (no pun intended). However, your conclusion that our smallness requires large people around to protect us from being raped is flawed: depending on "chivalry" to protect you is for suckers, it's unreliable at best. You don't really know a person until you're in a scary situation with them. If I'm jumped by a gang in an ally, the coward I'm with is liable to run away. I wouldn’t travel without a gun, this is 2012. Tech, my friend.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I don't like the feminist movement, because they pushed a law in the 1970's which entailed that cheerleading shouldn't be considered a sport and it passed. The reason why they don't want it to be a "sport" is because they don't want it to be officially recognized by the general public. They don't want girls to be seen as people who like dancing and looking pretty. The problem is, very many girls DO like dancing and looking pretty (dancing isn't for me, but I myself sure do like dressing up pretty) and all the feminist movement accomplished in making a law to inhibit cheerleading from being considered a "sport" is that funding for cheerleading safety regulation is now next to nil. Cheerleading is dangerous as **** and now it has a higher number of both serious and non-life threatening injuries than every other sport combined (look it up) because they don't even have trained safety staff or regulation mats to fall on, and have the head honchos of the feminist movement so much as batted an eye? No, they sure as **** haven't. They care more about the IMAGE of women suiting their own worldview, they want women to change to become what they want women to be. They don't care about the safety of REAL girls and women, that's literally ANTI-female. Don't call me a feminist.

Again, this is just one type of feminist viewpoint, the structuralist kind. It's not representative of ALL feminist ideology. It sounds to me like you, as most people are, her pretty much in sync with essentialist feminism, which posits that women do have inherit, biological based traits that make women what they are--such as that love of dressing up and looking pretty. Essentialist feminism argues that women should embrace their differences from men and find empowerment through those differences. Structuralist feminism, which seems to be largely comprised of lesbians, argues differently. And, not surprisingly, the seem to be much, much louder than essentialist feminists.

I used to think the same way, that all feminists think the way you describe above, but I'm taking a class based on feminist theory, and now realize that, like most things, it's more complicated.

I don't swear with the intention of offending someone. I do it once in a while to punctuate or add flare to a conversation. It's hilarious because I'm adorable.

I can't be the only one wanting to see pictures of Varenne. Her profile picture is plenty cute, but I wants more! Enough teasing with comments referring to your perfect breasts and adorability. As they say on the internets, pics or it didn't happen!

[Emil Miller]

[QUOTE=Mutatis-Mutandi;1115804]

Enough teasing with comments referring to your perfect breasts and adorability. As they say on the internets, pics or it didn't happen!

You seem to have an obsession with breasts lately, so how about these?

[Sancho]

Whoa! I'll bet her back hurts.

I don't swear with the intention of offending someone. I do it once in a while to punctuate or add flare to a conversation. It's hilarious because I'm adorable.

I suppose I’m giving Swear the relatively narrow definition of an Invective or a Vituperation. The type of swearing, or profane speech, that you’re talking about I think of as cussing – a sort of punctuation mark. And you’re right, it can be fun, and as somebody else mentioned: stress relieving - just so long as you’re not doing it next to a bunch of nuns, or a playground, or something.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

[QUOTE=Emil Miller;1115811]

You seem to have an obsession with breasts lately, so how about these?

I'd bop those things like I was Sugar Ray Leonard.

[JuniperWoolf]

I've had a strange phobia of fake boobs ever since I saw China's pop when I was a kid (the wrestler, she jumped off the top rope or something, I can't remember). Ever since then, it's only been real-boob porn for me, because in my world A FAKE ONE COULD BURST AT ANY MINUTE AND SPRAY EVERYONE WITH BLOOD AND FATTY TISSUE AND SYNTHETIC JELLY!

[Darcy88]

Alex and Darcy are taking what I said too much to heart, I'm not foaming-at-the-mouth and calling you insensitive condescending douchebags. I've known men who try chivalry with me, I consider them kind of cute and childish, I continue to present myself in the way I choose and they generally get the hint right away and stop trying to censor themselves. I honestly don't feel that strongly about this issue, talking to a woman with "chivalry" doesn't put me out, it puts you at a disadvantage because I can walk all over you (and I will, for the lol's). I simply prefer to make friends and lovers who are smart enough to see me for what I am and brave enough to behave accordingly.

Anyway, personal issues aside, I honestly don't want princess treatment, and I wouldn't be treated like a princess unless you have aspergers and can't pick up on communication cues in language, tone and facial expression. Talk to me for five minutes and you WILL pick up on my personality and adjust yourself accordingly, that's how human interaction works. Some women are different, some WANT to be coo-ed at and so they'd arrange your social interaction to pull that behavior out of you (which puts YOU at a huge disadvantage, if you want my opinion). You would come to learn very quickly through direct interaction with them that they expect you to be a "gentleman," and that's their choice (and your choice whether or not you follow their lead). They aren't the majority though, and neither am I. Most women probably don't even think about it, they're just being themselves. You can't expect all women to be exactly the same, or to be "mostly into being treated like a princess" or "mostly spit and curse like a sailor," we have personalities just like everyone else.

Well when it comes to female friends I do that and match my behaviour to what they want, which is often to be treated just like a guy. But I still won't say the c word around them nor will I insult them the way my male friends and I break each other's balls. I don't treat them like crowned queens but I still treat them a little differently, perhaps better, than I would if they were male. My statement earlier about princesses might have been hyperbole, but I still think a man should have two standards of conduct around each gender, but without taking it too far.

I also sort of see now why some women might interpret excessive chivalry on a man's part to mean that he considers women weak, in need of sheltering. I can put myself in a woman's shoes and imagine such treatment making me feel like I'm regarded as a child. And I've dated girls who would only let me pay for dinner after my repeated imploring protest. I think the latter is due to the fact that so many men are douche bags a lot of women don't want to feel dependent on them.

[Mutatis-Mutandis]

I've had a strange phobia of fake boobs ever since I saw China's pop when I was a kid (the wrestler, she jumped off the top rope or something, I can't remember). Ever since then, it's only been real-boob porn for me, because in my world A FAKE ONE COULD BURST AT ANY MINUTE AND SPRAY EVERYONE WITH BLOOD AND FATTY TISSUE AND SYNTHETIC JELLY!

I can't stand fake boobs (the reply to Emil was a joke, in case some don't pick up on that). They just look weird. I've yet to see a pair that doesn't look like two stiff, hard, immovable balloons. I'll take a flat chest any day.

[Darcy88]

Again, this is just one type of feminist viewpoint, the structuralist kind. It's not representative of ALL feminist ideology. It sounds to me like you, as most people are, her pretty much in sync with essentialist feminism, which posits that women do have inherit, biological based traits that make women what they are--such as that love of dressing up and looking pretty. Essentialist feminism argues that women should embrace their differences from men and find empowerment through those differences. Structuralist feminism, which seems to be largely comprised of lesbians, argues differently. And, not surprisingly, the seem to be much, much louder than essentialist feminists.

I didn't know that. The feminism I so often encounter is what you label "structuralist." This "essentialist feminism" seems to accord rather closely to my own beliefs. Funny, I thought I was an anti-feminist but I guess I'm just a feminist of a certain kind.

[JuniperWoolf]

I didn't know that. The feminism I so often encounter is what you label "structuralist." This "essentialist feminism" seems to accord rather closely to my own beliefs. Funny, I thought I was an anti-feminist but I guess I'm just a feminist of a certain kind.

Ditto.

[Alexander III]

Well, I guess we have a pretty clear window into your view of homosexuals, don't we?

Plus, the tough guy act is laughable.

I have always been pro-gay. The fact that you equate homosexuality and efeminacy speaks more about the hillbilly stereotypes you are acustomed to than anything else.

Anyway, personal issues aside, I honestly don't want princess treatment, and I wouldn't be treated like a princess unless you have aspergers and can't pick up on communication cues in language, tone and facial expression. Talk to me for five minutes and you WILL pick up on my personality and adjust yourself accordingly, that's how human interaction works. Some women are different, some WANT to be coo-ed at and so they'd arrange your social interaction to pull that behavior out of you (which puts YOU at a huge disadvantage, if you want my opinion). You would come to learn very quickly through direct interaction with them that they expect you to be a "gentleman," and that's their choice (and your choice whether or not you follow their lead). They aren't the majority though, and neither am I. Most women probably don't even think about it, they're just being themselves. You can't expect all women to be exactly the same, or to be "mostly into being treated like a princess" or "mostly spit and curse like a sailor," we have personalities just like everyone else.

Ok, look, you have to realize that you are an abnormal female, you deviate from norm. Yes you may not be like that, but the majority of girls do like that. Heck the majority of guys would like that too, why do you think waitresses and such always flirt, because men just like women enjoy being validated, enjoy being treated as if they were princess and princes. Waitress makes guy feel like a handsome movie star, guy will tip. Guy makes girl feel like princess she will be more favorable to him.

We come from very different worlds. The girls you know are rougher than the norm and the girls I know are more demanding than the norm. But the majority of girls enjoy being treated as if they were the center of the universe. That is human nature.

But I guese we all adapt to our environments. Like amongst the jersey shore people, gals will screw the man who treats them like a douchebag. Ergo men learn to behave like douchebags in order to get women. But when you no longer look at an isolated peice of humanity, but rather the whole. When a girl has the option of being treated like a pal, or being treated like the center of the universe - the majority will always pick the latter.

[Varenne Rodin]

I can't be the only one wanting to see pictures of Varenne. Her profile picture is plenty cute, but I wants more! Enough teasing with comments referring to your perfect breasts and adorability. As they say on the internets, pics or it didn't happen!

Haha. I don't feel the need to prove anything, but I've been meaning to post more pictures. I'm not some breast flasher, so no one should get their hopes up. Scarlett Johansson is pretty much my boob twin (I think mine are better). For comic-con dress up purposes, I'm very lucky to be stacked like a marvel girl. I only brag because I'm very impressed with myself.