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Thread: Cold Ale - The Blokes' Thread!

  1. #5086
    Orwellian The Atheist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarkBastable View Post
    Or possibly the second best, after the dogs playing pool.
    I have actually been in houses where that is framed and hanging on the wall.
    Go to work, get married, have some kids, pay your taxes, pay your bills, watch your tv, follow fashion, act normal, obey the law and repeat after me: "I am free."

    Anon

  2. #5087
    TobeFrank Paulclem's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by The Atheist View Post
    I have actually been in houses where that is framed and hanging on the wall.
    Me too. And my ex landlord left me the tennis girl scratching her bum in 1983.

  3. #5088
    Registered User jocky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MarkBastable View Post
    That's the best selling painting of all time, or something. Or possibly the second best, after the dogs playing pool.

    As this entire fanciable-women-in-proper-art thing has been rendered a low-class joke by Brian 'jocky' Sewell over there, I shall be forced to seek out a Web page of that chick on a tennis court scratching her bum.
    Aye, no chance of that hanging in the rarified atmosphere of Bastable Hall. Sorry if I did not go into raptures over the Rosetti and am totally ignorant on the merits of the Pre Raphaelites and their antipathy toward Josh the Slosh.

    My point being that art is judged by individuals regardless of social status and just because that paticular work hung in the homes of millions of people worldwide, much the same as Andy Warhol's creations, it has as much merit as anything that is hung in a few Town Halls and Art Galleries.

    Right enough I am a dummy, enjoy:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBt0ER43trc

    Now might be the time to post some paintings of women by Lucien Freud.
    Last edited by jocky; 07-21-2011 at 07:25 PM.
    " There are few more impressive sights in the world than a Scotsman on the make. "

  4. #5089
    Registered User jocky's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gilliatt Gurgle View Post







    By the way Jocky, that poem you slipped in a few pages back did not go unnoticed. It went into my bag of tricks.




    .
    This reply should be read aloud in the slow drawl of John Wayne:

    Well hell Gurgle I'm a figurin we otta settle this in the old way,

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dKThgLq21Rc

    Anyone for a corn dodger ?
    " There are few more impressive sights in the world than a Scotsman on the make. "

  5. #5090
    Registered User jocky's Avatar
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    And if you think I am annoying you have obviously never met my late Uncle John:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FgsPzydgzxE

    He could spin a yarn
    " There are few more impressive sights in the world than a Scotsman on the make. "

  6. #5091
    www.markbastable.co.uk
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    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    Aye, no chance of that hanging in the rarified atmosphere of Bastable Hall. Sorry if I did not go into raptures over the Rosetti and am totally ignorant on the merits of the Pre Raphaelites and their antipathy toward Josh the Slosh.

    My point being that art is judged by individuals regardless of social status and just because that paticular work hung in the homes of millions of people worldwide, much the same as Andy Warhol's creations, it has as much merit as anything that is hung in a few Town Halls and Art Galleries.

    Right enough I am a dummy, enjoy:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBt0ER43trc

    Now might be the time to post some paintings of women by Lucien Freud.
    I rather like Freud's stuff - but the stuff at Bastable Halls isn't exclusively rarefied. From where I'm sitting I can see framed posters of this:




    and this



    and this



    (Also, a stuffed owl, a pewter Snoopy moneybox and a large plaster statue of Captain Hook.)

    I disagree with you about merit by numbers though. I think there are completely objective qualities by which it's possible to say that the Picasso above is a better painting than the dogs playing pool. Which is not to say that people should like it more.

  7. #5092
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    Mmm.. Anyway back to the girl scratching her bum.

    That poster was on the wall in many male student's bedroom in my student days.

    The students of the fairer sex had that "Wings of Love" on theirs' depicting a miserable looking naked man being delivered on the underside of a swans wing to a naked girl sat on a damp floor. Very romantic.

    In fact here it is.


    I always thought that swan was about to give the poor bloke a "Bobbiting"
    Last edited by prendrelemick; 07-22-2011 at 06:26 AM.

  8. #5093
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    Mark an' Gilliatt elevate the tone,
    With pics of Jane and Perse-phone,

  9. #5094
    Orwellian The Atheist's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    My point being that art is judged by individuals regardless of social status and just because that paticular work hung in the homes of millions of people worldwide, much the same as Andy Warhol's creations, it has as much merit as anything that is hung in a few Town Halls and Art Galleries.
    And often, quite a lot more!

    I wish more people knew that.
    Go to work, get married, have some kids, pay your taxes, pay your bills, watch your tv, follow fashion, act normal, obey the law and repeat after me: "I am free."

    Anon

  10. #5095
    Justifiably inexcusable DocHeart's Avatar
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    Parker, can you fix me a very mild one? And a glass of water, if you can, yes, I think I'll water it down a bit tonight, I'm driving. What are you staring at me like this, you daft lump, you still can't tell when I'm kidding? Get me a double, neat.

    Guys, I wanna share something with you. This gave me the horn:

    http://www.online-literature.com/for...ad.php?t=63061

    You think I should apologise to my shrink for deliberately burning a hole in his sofa with my cigarette and start having sessions with him again?

    Cheers
    Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks into mine...

  11. #5096
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    ^Noooo, this is the kind of thing women talk about - to their own kind - I'll have one of those too please Parker!

  12. #5097
    Registered User jocky's Avatar
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    That Doc, he does not pop in very often but he always leaves me feeling uneasy. I can just picture him standing at the bottom of my hospital bed:

    "Jocky I have good news and bad news for you"

    O.K Doc give me the bad news.

    "You have only got two weeks to live"

    Long silence , so what is the good news?.

    "The guy in the bed opposite you wants to buy your slippers."

  13. #5098
    Registered User jocky's Avatar
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    Guys and gal Jocky has got some breaking news which could have life changing repercussions. Scientists have announced without equivocation that the Hadron Collider may or may not have picked up elements of the God particle:

    http://www.thepeninsulaqatar.com/int...ggs-boson.html

    Remember you heard it in the Cold Ale Thread first. I can't wait to tell Mrs Jocky when she comes home from her work in the morning.
    " There are few more impressive sights in the world than a Scotsman on the make. "

  14. #5099
    Tralfamadorian Big Dante's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    That Doc, he does not pop in very often but he always leaves me feeling uneasy. I can just picture him standing at the bottom of my hospital bed:

    "Jocky I have good news and bad news for you"

    O.K Doc give me the bad news.

    "You have only got two weeks to live"

    Long silence , so what is the good news?.

    "The guy in the bed opposite you wants to buy your slippers."
    Quote Originally Posted by jocky View Post
    Guys and gal Jocky has got some breaking news which could have life changing repercussions. Scientists have announced without equivocation that the Hadron Collider may or may not have picked up elements of the God particle:

    http://www.thepeninsulaqatar.com/int...ggs-boson.html

    Remember you heard it in the Cold Ale Thread first. I can't wait to tell Mrs Jocky when she comes home from her work in the morning.

    How much for the slippers?
    Wait no... How much for the God or possibly not God particle?

  15. #5100
    Registered User prendrelemick's Avatar
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    I bet the God particle cost a bit more than the slippers.
    Last edited by prendrelemick; 07-23-2011 at 02:22 AM.

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