Minimalist Poetry Contest

[tailor STATELY]

Congratulations DieterM !

Yes, an excellent and most poignant poem.

Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor STATELY

[Pendragon]

Congrats DieterM, I enjoyed your poem as well!

Sorry, moonbird, chalk it up to my illness and recent hospital stay. You had a rather nice couplet there! Again I am sorry for skipping you.

[moonbird]

Sorry, moonbird, chalk it up to my illness and recent hospital stay. You had a rather nice couplet there! Again I am sorry for skipping you.

No problem, Pendragon.

[jajdude]

Good one Dieter, was quite a bunch of words. Pen, I also had no idea what I wrote. Booze. Hope you are well. We love you.

[DieterM]

Wow, thanks a lot guys, that really makes my day! I'm not sure it's deserved as all the other poems, each in its own personal way, were great. But it's a subjective decision anyway, and I mesure the responsability as it's mine now. First thing: what shall we write about next? That's a hard one... **still pondering**

Okay, for lack of space in my flat (and because I was too lazy to clean them yet again, I confess), I've been recently throwing away all my childhood cuddy toys.

So let's use this simple topic as our leitmotiv: 'Toys'.

Deadline is July 15th (incidentally the day after my birthday so I'll take your submissions as this year's birthday gift ;-))

To your quills, my friends!

[Pendragon]

It seems today
we have so many toys
but I have a picture
of a little girl with a corn shuck doll
The look in her eyes is rapture...

Pendragon

[jajdude]

The teddy bear without eyes
sits soiled in the corner
next to some broken Lego Blocks
and a few half-melted plastic soldiers

[YesNo]

Nothing Happened

Jane's boy toy from last weekend's gone.
Her husband asks about something.
"Nothing happened." Life will bring
The varied flowers from the spring
Along to feel the winter's frost.
They end like toys once played upon
With memories that linger on
Reminding them of what they lost.

[tailor STATELY]

Little Lost Teddy

O Father dear
I've lost my teddy
O what am I to do ?

O sleepy one
Ere the sun went down
You left him on the swing

O Father dear
By starlight's grace
I could not espy him there

O dearest child
Perhaps he's gone, and
Run off with the moon to play

O Father dear
Will he return
When the sun should rise ?

O precious one
His will be done
For this we too shall pray

:tailor STATELY

Inspiration for this poem came from a talk at church given by a visiting High Councilman last Sunday (except his child asked him to join her in prayer); and a banner in Placerville, CA up for auction by Cathie Urquhart titled "Bearly Summer" with a teddy bear sitting in a swing in a sunny country backyard.

[DieterM]

Half of the time is up already, 4 excellent poems foreshadow heavy migraines when the day of decision will be there for me… Let's say no more; I just wanted to cheer you on. 15 days left to submit your entry. The subject still being Toys.

[moonbird]

Plastic smile
shining white
under vacant eyes

Elegant feet
perfectly arched
to fit her shoes

Frozen in time
like a statue
in her cold beauty

The sun shines
on her face
but she cannot feel it

She is smiling
but somehow I doubt
she is happy

[breathtest]

The toy is him, because it is
his shape and his size, and it fits
her as he fits her,

and she feels him when he is not there.

[DieterM]

Thanks everyone for participating; decision time has come. I didn’t anticipate so many different poems dealing with the subject at hand yet, when reading your entries, with each new one, I told myself ‘Yes, exactly! Ah, and yes, there, too, another new way to speak of toys!’ Needless to say, thus, that I’m really happy to find all of you would qualify to be the winner (I never doubted that).

Now, my sincere excuses; as eager as I am to read your poems, I’m very very bad at analyzing them. I’m maybe just too enclosed in my subjectivity. I will try however to point out the things that touched me with each entry.

Pendragon, I loved the image you created in my mind of that little girl (I somehow see her black-skinned, serious look in her eyes, hair standing up in neat little peaks, perhaps because I see so many of them in this part of Paris) without ever describing her physically.

Jajdude, all the same, your poem makes images arise in my mind more with the things you don’t say than with what you say. You masterfully hint at something awful having – maybe –happened (war? earthquake?) that could be nothing at all, too (just some toys being left behind because people moved out or grew too old to play with the toys).

Yes No, I hadn’t thought of the idea of a boy toy bringing back some meaning to a frustrated wife’s life (and her husband’s as well, or at least, that’s how I read your lines) and find your poem very fitting as it turns the whole subject to something completely different (yet, it IS the same subject after all). Couldn’t prevent from singing ‘The Way We Were’ all along to your poem (“…can it be that life was all so simply then, or has memory re-written every line?…”)

Tailor Stately, I see that teddy bear sitting on the swing, and I hear the little child’s prayer. The structure reminded me of that great Goethe poem ‘Der Erlkönig’ where a father and his feverish son have a poetic dialogue until the little one dies at the end. I particularly liked the idea of the being having ‘run off with the moon to play’.

Moonbird, I simply loved that simple comparison of the doll as seen by the child (again, something you don’t say but imply) and the way we adults would see her, with all the questioning we add. Can a doll be happy? For a child, a non-question (of course she is ‘cause she’s my baby); for us, perhaps the essential (Ive-ish unanswered) one.

Breathtest, I’m not sure I’ve understood what you wanted to say; I had to re-read your poem over and over again. Yet, I don’t have to understand poems (or music) with my mind; if there is something that touches my heart. And ‘he fits her’ is such a strong, magic image (for good ol’ romantic me)… a great poem.

But there can only be one winner. And the decision is not easy. It took me a day too much (remember, I promised to be ready on July 15th). Congratulations, YesNo, the (virtual( prize is yours this time. And congrats & thanks to all of you for that wonderful birthday gift of your precious lines…

[blithe spirit]

Congratulations YesNo...I liked the metaphor you tucked in the middle and the creative use of "toy". "Bridges of Madison County" came to mind.

[YesNo]

Thanks, DieterM! And thanks, blythe spirit!

The next topic is beach. I haven't been to one recently, but with Lake Michigan nearby, I have no real excuse.

Deadline: August 6th, three weeks from now.