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  1. Thank you for your suggestions; this will help me...

    Thank you for your suggestions; this will help me out a lot. Good to get advice from someone who has been on this site for awhile.
  2. Thank you for the advice, DATo. I highly respect...

    Thank you for the advice, DATo. I highly respect your advice to the fullest. I do agree that I could have written it better. I do tend to try too hard at times with my writing, but I know I will take...
  3. Thanks for the advice; I will use it for future...

    Thanks for the advice; I will use it for future writings. I understand I could have put it more simple, but I really wanted her body to communicate a very desolate state. I could have still painted...
  4. I've been trying to improve for the best, and...

    I've been trying to improve for the best, and thank you. I know I can make the story even better from the criticism. Some places I can explain better, like the moving closer and their thighs touching...
  5. Silent Words (Decided to rewrite this one. It's short, but please read still, thanks)

    I had looked into her eyes when she told me to sit down. Wondering why, I tried to take deep breathes to keep myself calm. She looked at me trying to speak, but there had been nothing but silence...
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    Thanks for the constructive criticism,...

    Thanks for the constructive criticism, AuntShecky. This is exactly what I've been trying to do as of lately, trying to read more works to understand what is specifically done in good writing. I do...
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    I will definitely keep writing 108 Fountains....

    I will definitely keep writing 108 Fountains. Thank you for the response because I do feel that I tend to try to impress the reader or audience by wording my writing with "impressive" diction. When I...
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    Thank you for the reply, and I have found out...

    Thank you for the reply, and I have found out numerous things about my writing already from this site, which I am very grateful to hear about from all of you here on this forum. Hopefully, you will...
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    Again, thanks for the feedback 108 Fountains. I...

    Again, thanks for the feedback 108 Fountains. I guess I feel to describe the story the way I do because I want it to stick out to the reader. I can see that I can take out some words that I do not...
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    Thanks for your critique. I really appreciate it,...

    Thanks for your critique. I really appreciate it, and I will use your tips on my future writings. The learning process is a long one, but I'll fully find my writing voice sometime.
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    Yeah, I thought about that when I had written it;...

    Yeah, I thought about that when I had written it; it was supposed to be that he wasn't supposed to forgive her, but he genuinely understood the mistake she had made. I thought it would display a...
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    Yeah, I thought about that when I had written it;...

    Yeah, I thought about that when I had written it; it was supposed to be that he wasn't supposed to forgive her, but he genuinely understood the mistake she had made. I thought it would display a...
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    I really liked how you put both of the views in...

    I really liked how you put both of the views in the story. This was written very nicely as well, I believe. Pretty good for your first work. I can't wait to hear more.
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    The Days Are Blue

    * I decided to start a series of short stories in order to become better at writing; and I genuinely want to find my writing voice to the fullest extent possible, so I will be updating when I can if...
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    Echo of Pain

    I'm an beginning writer, so give me feedback, please. Enjoy.
    We sat down together, and I was glaring with startling eyes into her soft, watering eyes.
    “Hey, babe. You, okay?” I said, with a...
  16. Thread: Ditches

    by Move_Along91
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    Ditches

    Ditches:

    The family cemetery branched out like a tree, which spread out to every section of the graveyard; the main stone pathway reached out towards the rest of the cemetery, connecting to the...
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    Sticky: Hey, everyone. It's glad to be on the site. I...

    Hey, everyone. It's glad to be on the site. I just really want to experiment with some of my writing because I want to hopefully find my style one day. Give me some feedback, thanks.
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