-
Catching Up
You arrived first, as you always do
and I arrived late, as usual.
Your coffee has been poured already,
so I must order.
We say hello, as we always do
and you turn your cheek
for friendship's kiss
and I sit and listen to your news.
At last, my beverage arrives,
with its matching foam and sprinkles,
the biscuit in the saucer
could be the twin of yours.
I used not to drink cappuccino,
not until you taught me to.
Like Hancock, I had no need
of froth in my life.
It's been a year, so we catch up,
with time's interlude ignored.
Your son, now twenty-two,
was eight when I met you.
I sip and listen to vicarious adventures,
occasionally contributing a memory
of somewhere we've both been,
and then our cups are empty.
Lots more to be said
and it's too soon yet to part.
I ask if you'd like another,
you say yes, but decline my offer of a bun.
I treat you to a Madeleine anyway,
and we talk and watch from the balcony
as the coffee shop empties
and chairs are put up on tables.
-
Lines like these:
the biscuit in the saucer
could be the twin of yours.
is what keeps me coming back. I feel overwhelmed by certain non-poetry almost on a daily basis for God knows how many agonizing months while the "real" poets dwindle, it's such a wonderful feeling to read something that goes beyond artificial to something organic and so original.
I might be reading more into this, but and then our cups are empty and you say yes, but decline my offer of a bun seem to be rich in nuances if not caffeine and calories. One is left to wonder what happens after the place closes and the real catching up begins. Great job Hawk, loved it.
-
-
Simply loved it. I like the way you give a detailed picture of seemingly unimportant things, conveying the emotions through them. Can't mention any favorite line as I like the whole poem.
-
Haunted: cheers, glad you liked it. :) Organic coffee? I didn't ask - lol! Thanks for thinking it original; feel free to keep visiting. ;) Bit different for me I think. I'm glad you got so much out of it, though I must give some thought to the nuances of buns, especially when declined! Thanks so much for reading and letting me know you had :)
Twota: Long time no see. Thanks for reading and loving it :cheers2:
Ripley: Thanks to you to :) What can I say? I'm delighted that you enjoyed it so much.
Live and be well - H
-
Wow. Hawkman, it's very rare for me to find a poem on a forum great enough for me to add it to my favorites. This is the type of poetry that triggers a real emotional spark in me. Simply put, this is fantastic and I believe you'll easily find someone willing to publish it.
-
I like it, too, Hawkman. I like what Haunted had to say. When two old friends get together, the very air is replete with nuance and looking back and wondering...
-
It's really easy to like. It's simple and well communicated. It also invokes in this reader similar memories with friends in coffee shops. It's warm and familiar like a coffee shop, anyways.
J
-
XX: I'm most gratified that you rate it so highly. I guess it's because the poem is about one of those experiences that everyone can relate to. The reader is able to invoke their own memories of similar stuations to fit between the lines. Anyway, thanks for reading and for your complimentary comment. :)
qim: I'm delighted that you enjoyed it as well. As I said above, the nuances are probably as many and varied as the readers. Many thanks for your thoughts, and for enjoying the poem. :)
Jack: Thank you too Jack. Yes, the familiarity is probably the key to the poem's appeal.
Thanks again to all whove read and commented.
Live and be well - H
-
Appealing for its accesibility and as Jack said its familiarity. Capturing a moment is not as easy as you made it seem. Good job Mr Bird.
-
Cheers JB, Much appreciated.
Live and be well - H
-
this is the most vivid poem i have read in months... its concise and laced with a subtle passion... i'm glad it was the first poem i read after a long hiatus from these forums. cheers for posting boss!
-
Thanks Sampson, both for reading and enjoying. Nice to know that your first bite after long absence was mine, and that it was so satisfying :)
Live and be well - H
-
-
Thank you for bringing your poem up to date... don't know how I missed it the first time around.
Enjoyed very much :)
Ta ! (short for tarradiddle),
tailor