If you were a...

Russian

If you were an historic weapon, what would you be?

A shield... I love to shield the people I love.

If you were a Tennis racket, who would own you?

Ilie Nastase

If you were a house how many rooms would you have?

10... Because I have always wanted a big house.

If you were a truck, what goods would you be delivering?

I'd be empty

If you were a hermit, who would you love?

Another hermit... hahahaha

If you were a pen, what would you write?

Broken things mended.

If you were a dog, who would you bark at?

no one

If you were lost, how would you get found?

By my dog.

If you were a village, in what country would you be?

By dogs. I smell.

If you were on fire, would you blaze or smoulder?

Blaze...

If you were a germ, which one would you be?

without a country....
Hopefully blaze...
probably the one that just got covered in germicide...

If you were five again, what would you do today?

Hey Mary, snap on the dogs. Maybe we both smell.

If I were 5 I would dig a hole to australia.

If you were outside alone and you knew no-one inside would you still go in?

Is there candy inside?

If you were piece of money which denomination would you be?

a penny

If you were dead, would anyone mourn?